Perfectionist
by KingdomFlameVIII
Summary: Sometimes things in life don't go the way you expect them to. Sometimes you're given a small coffee instead of a large. And then sometimes your entire fucking job is just a cover for an underground resistance and your soulmate accidentally popped out the wrong gender. M for language, substance, very slight gore, Sonic the Hedgehog references and adult situations.
1. Late

**Hey all! KingdomFlameVIII here! It's been awhile since I've posted any kind of story, be it a oneshot or a novel. I've been hard at work writing... this! So originally I wasn't going to start posting chapters for this until I was finished with it, but I did that with my first story, and looking back on it, it just seemed really rushed to me because I was in such a hurry to get it typed and not edited! Also, I've realized that stories that are gradually posted over long periods of time get more hits and reviews. And you have NO IDEA how much I adore reviews. I practically pee my pants every time I see a new one (not really but you get the ides xD) **

**ANYWAY! Stop reading this and start the story! :D**

_Dammit! Gonna be late again!_

The tranquil silence of the stiff early morning was broken with a loud rustle of sheets as Axel scrambled to get out of bed. This wasn't the first time he'd been late for work, if he kept it up he knew he wouldn't have said job for long.

_Least I showered last night, _he thought to himself, pulling his long red hair into a rubber band with a loud snapping sound. He grabbed the first pair of jeans he saw and pulling them up over the boxers he'd slept in and yanked a shirt off a hanger at random. Quickly he went into the bathroom to check himself in the mirror. Though much of his hair was contained in the band, lots hung out, sticking up in long, gravity defying spikes. He never did anything to make it look that way; he was born with it.

_I look like Reno, _he thought with distaste.

Reno was his brother, elder by three years, but most people mistook them for twins. They had matching personalities, as well as features, their hair was the same in colour, even their voices were identical. They also each had a blatant disregard for the rules. The only immediate distinguishable difference between them was their eyes; Reno's a soft blue, whereas Axel's were piercing green. They did do a few things to help people tell them apart though. The first was the hair. Reno often tied his back in a long, low ponytail, the hair on the top of his head piled in messy spikes, very similar to how Axel had his now. Axel usually just let his go natural.

The two men also had tattoos underneath their eyes. They'd gotten them together, after their parents died in a building collapse. Axel (appropriately, he thought) got small purple teardrops in their memory. Reno got little red rims underneath each outer corner. It kind of looked like he'd been burned by a pair of riding goggles.

After looking into his own emerald eyes for a moment, Axel splashed some water onto his face to wake himself up and left the bathroom without brushing his teeth. He didn't have time to take his time.

He hurriedly gulped down some instant coffee, snatching his backpack off of the kitchen counter and rushing out the door. When he got downstairs and out the door onto the sidewalk, he hastily pulled a skateboard out of his backpack. It was a pretty juvenile way to get around, he knew, but it was much cheaper than a car, and easily fit inside of his backpack for easy transportation.

He liked his "ride" to work. Generally he left his home between seven and eight o'clock in the morning, only minutes after sunrise. He liked to watch his shadow coast through the soft, pink morning light, his shadow warping and twisting around everything he happened to pass. Even in a bustling city like Hollow Bastion, the crisp chilly mornings were peaceful. He liked to watch the bird sit on telephone wires and call out to one another, especially the mourning doves. He always loved the sounds they made, even as a kid, and one day, his father had taught him how to whistle with his hands, just like them. At any given time he could cup his hands together and blow through his thumbs, creating a similar sound. It could always calm him down if he needed it.

On this particular morning he wasn't exactly paying attention to where he was going, only absently did he follow his regular route to work. Instead he watched the birds come and go from their perch, taking in their lovely serenade, until—

_CRASH_

He flew off his skateboard and would have fallen flat on his face, had he not thrown both hands out to break the fall, scraping them in the process. He slowly got up, dazed, idly wondering what it was he hit. Turning around, he realized that it wasn't a something, but a someone that he'd hit. Sitting up on the pavement, clutching the side of his head, was a teenager with spikey blonde hair.

"Oh man! I'm so sorry, are you okay?" asked Axel concernedly, offering a hand to the kid.

The blonde boy glared daggers at him. Ouch. He got up, ignoring the hand he was being offered.

"What's your problem!" he demanded Axel.

So he was one of _those _kids. Well, Axel could fight fire with fire.

"Oh, you know, cruisin' down the street, I totally just felt like ruining someone's morning," he said with heavy sarcasm, "and when I saw you walking oh so innocently I just couldn't _help_ hitting you and possibly giving myself a concussion in the process."

Blondie rolled his eyes. Wow, his eyes were pretty. They were large, round, and the color of the sky, except deeper. Like if the sky and the ocean were merged. _That, _Axel thought, _is the color that the sky _should _be._

"Yeah, whatever, watch where you're going," the blonde hissed. With that, he turned around and walked off.

Axel ran his hand through his hair. If the kid hadn't been so rude about it, he might have felt sorry for knocking him down. He _was _pretty cute. Axel shrugged and picked up his skateboard, which lie upside down in the street, thankfully unharmed. He continued his ride to work, this time quickly, being very careful to _not _pay attention to things like shadows and singing birds. After a few moments, the streets he took began to become bare of buildings and ripe with trees, littering the sidewalk with dry leaves, skidding around in the chilly autumn breeze. He sighed as he approached the ten foot tall wrought iron gate, ready for just another day.

"Axel! You're late again!"

Axel checked his watch to make sure. Ten minutes late. Damn.

He grinned sheepishly and turned his palms skyward, "Sorry, Leon. It won't happen again."

"You bet your ass it won't," the moody brunette growled, "you're the best damn guy we got here, but this can't keep up. Next time you're out on your ass, capiche?"

Axel sighed, "Yes sir."

Leon was never really the cheerful type, though usually, unlike everyone else in this godforsaken place, he just grouched around instead of bitching at everyone else, and for that Axel was grateful. The brunette was quite a well-known model… once. That was before the motorcycle accident. Ever since then he had a great big scar, slashed right across his forehead, obviously rendering him incapable in working in front of the camera, at least not from the neck up. So he stood behind the camera and took over the studio that he once modeled in, leaving Axel the star prodigy.

Never once growing up did Axel ever imagine taking up the line of work that was now his career. Sure, he wasn't exactly straight, but that didn't make him a _girl._

Originally he'd just taken a job at the studio because he needed work; Reno and Leon had been dating at the time, so Leon offered him a job mainly as an assistant. He carried stuff around, he was in charge of managing the cameras. Well as it turned out, he _sucked _with cameras. He couldn't even _touch _them without screwing something up. Anything anyone tried to teach him would go through one ear and out the other.

He had a feeling he was about to lose the job when one of the models unexpectedly called in sick, leaving the photographer from one of the highest class clothing companies in Hollow Bastion with no one to shoot. So in a panic, Leon told Axel to step in, and according to everyone around him, he was very good at it.

Axel didn't understand what made his pictures any better than anyone else's. He didn't know jack about lighting or posing or symmetry or any of that other weird shit that Leon always went on about; he just did what he was told and held still. The pictures that came out of it didn't even look like him; his bottom teeth were never crooked, his tattoos were airbrushed over, they always photoshopped some stupid fake sparkle in his eyes.

If he were to be brutally honest (which Axel usually was) he despised the modeling world. He didn't hate his _job, _since all he had to do was sit still and let people take his picture, but he hated the snobs he had to work with. They were all stuck up and bitch and prissy, constantly yanking him around and telling him what to eat, when to sleep, and how he had to live. Because apparently, now that he lived in the fashion world, if he didn't live off tofu he wouldn't remain as naturally skinny as a beanpole, regardless of what he ate. He hated how everyone there made such a huge fuss about something that people don't even need. Why is it _absolutely _necessary to be leaning at _just _the right angle and tip your chin upward _just _enough to model an eighteen hundred dollar wristwatch? Axel didn't understand it.

As soon as Leon was out of sight, Axel punched in and grabbed his schedule for the day. Fruit of the loom, Calvin Klein, _and _2xist before noon? This was gonna be a rough morning…

* * *

><p>As Axel was getting ready to leave for his lunch break after being yanked, twisted and pulled all morning, Leon called him back.<p>

"Axel! Wait a moment, you need to come meet the new intern."

Axel stopped, but didn't turn around, "What for? We get a new one, like, once a month, and you know damn well I don't bother learning half of their names—"

"Because I'm assigning him to you," said Leon irritably.

"Alright, fine…"

Axel turned around to face the newcomer, and stopped in his tracks.

"Blondie?"

He gaped at him, open mouthed. Blondie sneered, "If you take a picture, it'll last longer."

Axel promptly shut his mouth. Why did this kid _hate _him so much?

Leon seemed to be thinking the same thing. "Do you two know each other? Most people don't take a disliking to him so quickly…"

Axel ran one had through his hair, "Awe come on Squally, Saïx didn't hate me," he reasoned, "and that pointy eared bastard hated _everyone!"_

His boss rolled his eyes, "Saïx didn't hate you because you were _sleeping _with him, Axel. And don't call me Squall."

Axel grinned and shrugged, "So? He still always had a stick up his ass, though in my case—"

"Okay! We get the point!" Leon cut him off again, "Anyway, this is Roxas," he gestured to Blondie, "Roxas, this is Axel. You got a problem with him, get over it, 'cause you two are stuck together until further notice." And with that he stalked off, to do whatever it was managers did, leaving the two of them alone.

"Roxas, huh?" Axel liked the name. It felt cool on his tongue. Rrrrrrrrrrroxxaaaaaaassssssss…

"Yes," Roxas spat.

"What's your problem?" Axel said, just as harshly, "this can't just be because I knocked you over this morning, you know damn well it was an accident, and I _did _apologize you know." He stopped himself before he could get into a rant; he knew that once he got started, it'd take forever to cool down, no matter how silly the issue at hand.

Roxas glared, "Just forget it," he said coolly, looking away, "we're stuck together, so let's just try to get along."

Axel put his hands up in surrender, "That's what I've been trying to do from the start, kid."

If Roxas' dirty look had softened any, it was back now, "Don't call me kid," he growled.

Axel allowed a chuckle, "But you're so small! What are you, like 4' 11''?"

Roxas turned red, "No," he said defensively, "I'm 5' 3''! You're just freakishly huge. What are _you, _seven feet tall?"

"Ooh, burn," said Axel, laughing again, "does it matter? If you must know I'm 6' 5''. How old are you anyway? You look kinda younger than the rest of the interns we usually see around here."

"If _you _must know, I'm nineteen," he deadpanned, "I'm an undergrad at HBU."

Nineteen huh? He _was _pretty cute.

"Well, _Roxas_," he emphasized the name as to show he wasn't calling the kid 'kid,' "I'm on my break right now, and you're taking up precious time," he pretended to check his watch, "So if you wanna keep chattin', you're gonna have to come with me."

Roxas snorted, "No thanks, I'll stay here."

"Okay, suit yourself," Axel winked at him, then continued out the door and headed for his favorite coffee shop.

* * *

><p>"Axel! You're late, man, your coffee's getting cold."<p>

"Sorry, dude, I was chattin with the new intern," said Axel, sitting down at his usual seat with the sandy haired man that had called out to him. His hair was styled into a mullet slash faux hawk, the result of a lawnmower accident several years back.

"Another one?" he asked, "Man, Leon goes through them like I go through hair gel."

"I think that's because they all leave within the month, Demyx." Axel laughed.

Demyx laughed too, "Yeah, Leon's a bit of a handful isn't he?" He started taking the creamers out of the little dish at their booth and stacking them into towers.

"Yeah. I don't know what he thinks he's playing at, pairing the poor guy with me, of all people, he'll be running away _screaming._"

"Screaming your _name,_ maybe," said Demyx, winking at him.

"Pft, no way, the kid hates me," said Axel almost wistfully.

"Screaming your name with a hatchet in his hand of course!" said Demyx, thumping him on the back of his head, "Get your mind out of the gutter."

"Well…" Axel began, "he _is_ pretty cute."

Demyx put one hand over his heart, "Why Axie, I'm hurt," he said in a false lament.

"Well if that's the case," Axel started, "then I'm hurt over Marluxia, Lexaeus, and What's-His-Face with the eyepatch." He smirked.

"Oh, cut it out," said Demyx, "You know I'm kidding. Besides you're one to talk, you broke the rules," he made a face, "you slept with a _girl._"

Axel wiggled two fingers at him, "Two things," he said, "One, I don't think Larxene really counts as a girl. And if we're gonna go down that road, two, I don't think Marluxia really counts as a man."

Demyx laughed, "Oh he's a dude alright. He was packing, like, eleven inches downstairs."

Axel (a mere eight) put his hand over his heart, " Why, Demyx, I'm hurt," he mocked.

Demyx waved his hand dismissively. "Sex life aside, how's your day going?"

Axel shrugged, "Same old same old," he said, "Leon's still bitching, the lights keep flashing, and the best is never good enough."

Demyx reached across the table for Axel's hand, intertwining their fingers, "are you unhappy there?" he asked softly.

"No," Axel replied. "Not unhappy per say. Just nobody there likes me. But they don't like anybody, I don't take it personally, it just—"

"Gets lonely," Demyx offered.

"Yeah."

They sipped at their coffees in silence until it was almost time for Axel to leave. After checking his watch and realizing the time, Axel stood up, "Well, I gotta get going," he sighed, tossing his empty cup into a nearby trash can, "I might get home a little bit late, I don't know how long it'll take to show the new guy the ropes."

Demyx nodded, "Okay. I'll see you later."

Axel embraced the shorter man and kissed him softly on the lips.

"Love you," Demyx said.

"Yeah. You too…" said Axel.

Axel still wasn't really comfortable with having an open relationship. He'd only agreed to it to make Demyx happy. He wanted to believe that what he and Demyx had was love…

_He jiggled his key in the faulty lock until the door swung open. He assumed that since the door had been locked, nobody was at home. So he decided to try and get a shower in before Demyx got home._

_Except the shower was already occupied; Demyx _was_ home, and he was making out, half naked, in the bathtub with some blonde with like ten earrings and a stupid little beard._

_Axel stopped dead. He didn't know what to do. How was he supposed to react? What was one supposed to do after catching their boyfriend _cheating _on them? Drunk, too, by the smell of it. He cleared his throat. Demyx looked up at him, horrified._

_He was gonna go with the classic, 'what the fuck is this?' but then his Axel gene took over._

"_Not to _interrupt _anything," he snapped, "but would you mind taking that somewhere else? I was kind of hoping I'd be able to take a shower."_

_Demyx started stammering and sputtering nonsense words. Axel ignored them, not even bothering to try to make sense of it. He didn't want to hear explanations. He turned to leave the room, "I'll leave you two to wrap up, I see how it is."_

"_No! Please Axel wait!" Demyx cried, his voice completely broken._

"_If you wanted me to join you, the answer's no," Axel hissed, slamming the door behind him._

_He went into his bedroom, _their _bedroom, and locked the door. He didn't know who to be angrier at. Demyx? Or himself? Should he have seen this coming? Was it _his _fault? What was he to Demyx, just some fuck toy? He felt so stupid for having been naïve enough to believe he loved him. _

_He cupped his hands together and blew into his thumbs, like his father taught him how to do when he was small. He closed his eyes and took in the sound, trying to steady his heart rate, trying to make sense of his scattered thoughts and ignore all the emotions running through his body._

_He felt sickened. He'd never even _considered_ cheating, ever, not on anybody. He and Demyx had only been dating for a few months, but what did that matter? You just don't _do_ that. He never hooked up with Saïx again when he called, no matter how many times he was asked._

_He put his head in his hands. He couldn't believe that _Demyx _would do that to him, of all people._

_The uncomfortable silence was broken by an unfamiliar voice, shouting. Axel didn't like it, having some prick he didn't even know yelling in _his _apartment, at _his _boyfriend, albeit his unfaithful boyfriend. _

_Demyx was crying now, Axel heard. He felt a surge of anger wash through him. He resisted going out there and punching the living daylights out of the stranger, though the bigger part of him still believed that Demyx _deserved _to cry. _

_Then he heard a sharp cry of pain and a thud of flesh on hard wood; the stranger had hit him. That was the last straw. Cheater or not, nobody touches Demyx._

_He bolted off his bed (their bed)and swung the door open with so much force that it slammed against the wall, breaking the sheet rock and leaving a hole._

_The man was standing over Demyx, who was sprawled on the floor, his hands brought up to protect his face. The blonde stopped dead and looked at Axel, his icy eyes narrowed and he shrunk back a bit. Axel had never seen himself angry, but he imagined it must have been terrifying, as he generally got a similar response from most people._

_He strode over to the man, who quickly began taking several steps backward, but Axel was faster than him. He caught up quickly and punched the asshole square in the face, sending him down flat on his ass. Axel grabbed as much of the short platinum blonde hair as he could, crouching down and glaring menacingly at the man._

"_Get the fuck out, now." He snarled, throwing the man to the ground. Without another word the man scrambled to his feet and booked it out the door._

_He turned to Demyx, who was still sitting on the floor, sobbing like a child. Most of Axel's anger had gone by then; he'd taken it out on Mr. High and Mighty with his stupid earrings. He scooped Demyx up and set him down on the couch._

"_Why, Demyx!" he demanded._

_Demyx sniffled a few times, then wiped away the tears that had been cascading freely down his face. When he was done tidying himself up he shifted his gaze warily to Axel._

"_How would you feel about an open relationship?"_

Axel was still thinking about Demyx when he skidded his board to a stop at the mansion in which he worked. Roxas sat on the swinging bench, no doubt awaiting Axel's return. He waved to the blonde as he kicked his board up and put it away in his back.

"What do we do first? Roxas asked him, following Axel through the ornate mahogany doors.

Axel checked his schedule, "I have a shoot to go to," he said, "I guess you're supposed to follow me around watch what I do. Most of it's pretty tedious though, and I swear I spend more time in hair and makeup than I do in front of the camera—"

"Wait," Roxas interjected, "I'm not a model, I'm a photographer."

"Really?" Axel asked. He'd just assumed that the blonde was a model, being paired with him and everything. He was pretty enough to be anyway.

"Yeah," Roxas answered, going red, "why do you reckon they paired me with you, then? What good is it for me to just follow you around and watch you pose?"

Axel shrugged, "I've been told I'm easy to pose, maybe Leon didn't want to start you off with too big a challenge," he suggested neutrally.

Roxas snorted, "Being around you is challenge enough."

"Ouch, that hurts Roxy," the redhead teased.

"Don't call me Roxy," he snapped in response.

"Can I ask you something?" Axel asked, changing his tone to something less mocking. Roxas gave him a cynical look, but nodded anyways. "Are you always this moody? Or is there a specific reason for your being so, for lack of a better word, pissy today?"

For the first time all day, Roxas' glare softened, the creases around his eyes and mouth smoothing over.

"No, I'm not usually _this _mad," he said quietly, "didn't know what to expect I guess."

Understandable, Axel reasoned. New job can be stressful on anyone, he couldn't blame Roxas for having his guard up. Axel decided not to press the matter anymore; he could be an asshole when he wanted to be, but for some reason or another he really didn't want to push it with this kid.

"Shoot's in room sixteen," said Axel casually, "third floor."

_Poir, First Sector, Hollow Bastion Branch _was located in a very strange building. The hallways and lobbies kept its original Victorian décor, though the wallpaper was peeling and some of the older statuettes were beginning to collect cobwebs. It was very dimly lit as well, all of the lamps were ornate as well as the wood and plasterwork, and every inch of the wall was covered in old portraits.

Despite its lack in professional setting, _Poir _was the most well known advertising company in Hollow Bastion; Axe saw his face plastered all over the city: Subway stations, park benches, magazines, and on the rare occasion a billboard or two.

"Pick a staircase," he said as he led Roxas into the main hall. He smirked in amusement as Roxas' jaw dropped as in took in the almost eerie settings. He turned to Axel with a skeptical expression on his face.

"Playboy mansion much?" he asked in a snide voice. It seemed as though his snobby attitude was back.

"Oh yeah," said Axel sarcastically, "by the time you're done takin' shots of _me _you'll have to change your pants."

Roxas made a 'tcheh,' noise and followed Axel through the large, echoing atrium.

"Go on, pick one," said Axel, gesturing to the two staircases on opposing ends of the room they were faced with (what would anyone ever need two staircases for, anyway, he used to wonder). Roxas shrugged his shoulders and pointed towards the closer one.

"Don't touch the railing," Axel instructed, "you'll get a splinter." He held up his left hand to show a small white scar at the base of his palm, "I learned the hard way."

"Ouch," said Roxas, leaning over to more closely inspect the scar, "On your _hand _too."

Axel shrugged his shoulders, "That was years ago."

"_You want a _what?_" Axel asked, confused._

"_Umm, it's like…" Demyx began, "It's like when we can uhh, like, sleep with other people._

_On any other occasion Axel would have teased him about his obnoxious use of the word 'like' and his inability to use a comma instead, but at this point it was all he could do to not grab his (ex?) boyfriend by the shoulders and shake him. He didn't like the idea at all. "So, what, you mean we just become friends with benefits?"_

"_No!" Demyx all but shouted, "No, no. It's like, we're still boyfriends, but we _have _friends with benefits."_

"_Why do you want them? Do you think our sex life is boring?" Axel asked._

_Demyx should his head, "No, our sex life is fine. I just like having something new once in a while."_

_Axel noted the use of 'something' instead of 'someone.' If sex was just an object to Demyx, maybe he could deal with this. "Please be straight with me," said Axel, pinching the bridge of his nose, "Do you even love me?"_

_Demyx immediately pounced on Axel and buried his face in his hair, sobbing again, "Yeah, Axel, I do. I…I know I f-fucked up bad. And I—" gulp "—hurt you… I wasn't t-trying to, and you probably hate me now, and I totally understand if you like never wanna talk to me again but I'm so so sorry and I love you and—"_

_He was rambling now. Axel really truly wanted to believe what Demyx was telling him. He didn't know if he could._

"_Demyx, shut up," he spat harshly. Demyx shut up, but continued to sob silently into his shoulder.\_

_Axel made no attempt to push his lover off of him, but didn't hold him either. He cupped his hands together and blew, as he had several minutes before. He still needed to clear his head, and calm himself down. Most people drank, he did this. Demyx was familiar with the action, so he didn't question it._

_He knew this wasn't right. It didn't feel right. He only wanted Demyx. Why didn't Demyx only want him? He should've broken it off then. But he didn't want to lose Demyx. In all reality, the cute brunette was all he really had left. His parents were dead, Reno was off being some top secret military spy or whatever in Midgar, all of his high school friends were gone…_

"_I'll think about it," Axel said after what seemed like hours. Maybe they could make it work, it was at least worth a shot. When Axel fell in love, he fell _hard. _He knew this about himself, and he knew he'd do stupid things to try to make it work. He knew he'd probably regret this someday, but he still loved Demyx. He just wanted everything to be okay…_

"Axel? Isn't that room sixteen?"

He stopped. He'd been so wrapped up in his thoughts he didn't realize that they'd walked right past the room they were supposed to be doing the shoot in.

"Oh, yeah…" said Axel absently, "Sorry, I zoned out a little," he chuckled airily as he headed towards the gleaming mahogany door, stamped with a bronze 16.

"Do that often do you?" Roxas asked amusedly."

"Actually I do. If I don't answer you right away you might have to slap me," he joked.

Roxas cracked a smile, "I'll hold you to that," he said sinisterly. What a little shit.

They entered the room and Roxas blinked a few times. It was set up exactly as it should be; lights, giant cameras, glossy linoleum tiled floors, backdrops. All very professional. Axel supposed that compared to the rest of the house the transition would be drastic to a newcomer.

Fiddling with the camera was a tall man with a toned figure, a heart shaped face and bubble gum pink hair falling down to his shoulders. His entire face lit up like Christmas when he saw Axel approaching him.

"Hey pyro!" He exclaimed cheerfully, "it's been too long, man!"

Axel gave a little wave, not expecting to see him back at work so soon, "Marly? What are you doing here? I thought you were in for… surgery?"

Marluxia waved a hand, "I chickened out," he said, laughing, "had it my whole life, you know? I took a little time off anyway 'coz my folks were home from touring for a little bit. Whoever said theatric arts was an easy business needs to be taught a lesson."

"Umm sure," said Axel, shaking his head, "Well I'm glad you're still you. It'd sure have been a waste, according to Demyx," he said, winking.

"Oh yeah, how is Demyx?" asked Marluxia.

"He's good, he's good," said Axel honestly, "So you're our paparazzi today, huh?"

"Yep!" said Marluxia happily, "You a new model?" he asked, addressing Roxas for the first time.

Roxas turned red again. "No…" he mumbled, "Why does everyone think that? I'm a photographer."

"Awe, lighten up, kid, it's a compliment," said Marluxia lightly, clapping him on the back, "It's only 'coz you're cute enough to be."

"Can we just start?" he asked weakly.

Marluxia just seemed to realize that it was time for work, not social hour, "Okay!" he said in his get-down-to-business voice, "seriously, though, loosen up. You're the new intern right? Do you have some kind of portfolio you have to do?"

"Umm, yeah, actually, I do," said Roxas, "should I use my own camera or—"

"Naw," said Marluxia, "I mean you can alternate if you want, but we're all set up here. You're one of us now, right? That means the set's all yours."

Roxas was clearly surprised at how welcoming the two of them were being. Axel supposed he had probably been expecting a bunch of Leons when he signed up. Which, admittedly, was pretty much what the rest of the company was like, except they bitched a lot more in shrilly, high-pitched voices. Even Leon was cooler than that.

"All of you this welcoming?" Roxas asked, approaching the camera and confirming Axel's suspicions.

"You got lucky with me and Marly," Axel said, "Everyone else around here is mostly a prissy little bitch."

"Yep!" said Marluxia cheerfully, "Fortunately for you, you got paired with Team Awesome for the first day."

"Team Awesome?" Axel and Roxas asked simultaneously. Roxas caught his eye but quickly looked away, "Okay, Axel, can you please go sit in front of the backdrop?"

Shrugging, Axel did what he was told. "How do you want me?" he asked. It was a pretty standard question in his line of work; he was used to being poked, prodded and re-positioned over and over again. Seriously, if he was an exceptionally _good _model, he didn't even want to know what the average one went through daily.

Roxas was still preparing the camera and shifting the focus, "Just put on whatever I'm supposed to be shooting, I'll be ready in a minute."

Axel looked at Marluxia expectantly. The pinkette didn't skip over to the wardrobe like he usually did. "It's a cologne ad," he said, "and your clothes are fine. So just kind of let your hair down, unbutton your shirt and put this on," he handed him a simple silver chain.

Axel nodded and slipped on the chain, pulling the rubber band out of his hair as he did so.

"Ready for me Roxy?" he asked, repositioning himself in front of the camera.

"Don't call me Roxy," he said disinterestedly, in a "I've-told-you-once-I've-told-you-a-thousand-times" voice, "and yes, I'm ready."

"Okay, so what should I do?"

Roxas studied him carefully a moment. Axel thought it only fair that since he was being stared at, he could stare back. Upon closer inspection he could see that unless the id used really damn good hairspray, the wild style he went about wearing was completely natural. It was full and soft looking. He wasn't wearing any makeup, and in Axel's opinion, he really didn't need it. And he could still not get over those eyes. No matter what they were doing, whether they be glaring, smiling, glazed over in thought, or staring intensely at him like they were now, they were beautiful.

"Just… hmm. Kind of relax. Support some of your weight on your hands, and fold one foot under the other. Sit like… like," he scrunched up his face in thought, "Like a mermaid on a rock."

Axel was a little bit taken aback. He'd never been told to relax before. He quickly tried to envision the pose Roxas was asking of him. He imagine a mermaid, her tail fin bent like knees, sitting almost lazily with her hands resting on the surface of a rock.

He tried to imitate the picture he had in his head. He bent his knees as one, tucking one foot under the other ad Roxas had instructed. He supported his upper body with one hand so he was sitting up, the other one draped casually over the curve of his waist.

"Is this okay?" he asked. He was expecting Roxas to slap on of his hands away or roughly grab his knees and position them the right way, or for him to grab his face and tilt it around like a hairdresser. But he didn't. He took a step back to observe and then nodded. "Yeah, that's fine. Pretend to be looking up at something intriguing, and hold still."

Axel angled his head and tilted it up the way he had a thousand times. He tried to imagine that he was looking at Demyx. He pictured his sandy hair, his childlike smile. For some reason the eyes wouldn't come to him. Instead of seeing the icy blue he was used to, a deep cerulean instead kept coming to mind…

"Axel? You can look down now."

"Mm? Oh!" He'd zoned out again, "How's it look?"

"Fine," Roxas stated flatly, "I need a natural one," he said to Marluxia. He said it like a question.

Natural? Axel had never been told to look natural before in a picture, ever. What was he even supposed to do?

"I… I don't know how," he confessed.

Marluxia laughed, "It means you make a smile and hold still, Axe. Like for a family picture."

That didn't sound too hard. "Oh… okay, I'll try it I guess," he said. He sat up so that his knees were bent out in front of him, like he would if he were playing a video game. That seemed like a "natural" enough pose to him.

"Okay, now look at the camera and smile," said Roxas, sounding amused.

Axel gave the camera his most charming smile. Roxas 'tsked' at him when he saw the photo.

"It looks forced, and fake," he said disapprovingly, "when I say I want a natural smile, I don't mean 'cover-of-sports-illustrated,' I mean, 'I'm-happy-to-be-here.' Can you make him laugh, Marluxia?"

Axel didn't realize that there was a difference between the smile he gave to the camera and a genuine one. One would think that with all the time he'd spent modeling that he'd have been given some kind of course on facial expressions. Looks like he still had a lot to learn.

"Hey Axel, Have you ever tried to _sneeze_ while you're takin' a piss? It's _frightening_, isn't it? It's frightening 'cause actually you _can't do it!_ It's _physically_ impossible to_sneeze_ while pissing! Your _brain_won't let it happen!"

"Umm, sure?" said Axel questioningly, amused but not yet smiling, "What are you getting at?"

"Well, your brain says: STOP _PISSING!_ WE'RE GOING TO _SNEEZE_NOW! 'Cause your brain_knows_...you might blow your asshole out," said Marluxia in a matter-of-fact tone.

He wasn't sure if it was the tone of voice Marluxia said it in, the spontaneity of it, or even such a random response to the topic in question. Whatever it was, it had Axel laughing his ass off.

_Click._

He blinked from the sudden exposure to bright light. He got the rest of his giggles out before rubbing his eyes and turning towards Roxas.

"Well? Was that one better?" he asked.

Roxas checked it and Axel spotted the ghost of a smile coast over the blonde's lips. "Yeah," he said amusedly, "It's good."

Marluxia approached Roxas, "Okay, I'm gonna step in now and do the rest. Roxas, your picture will be submitted with the rest of them as part of the collection, and you'll get copies for your portfolio," he assured him, "For the rest of the shoot, you just get to stand behind me and observe."

Roxas nodded and stepped to the side, making room for the pinkette.

Marluxia cracked his knuckles menacingly and smirked deviously at Axel, "Alright, Axe, let's see what you got."

* * *

><p>"I guess I've got quite a bit to learn about posing people," said Roxas, the blush that shone a bright red across his cheeks finally fading to a rosy pink, "I didn't realize just how… <em>suggestive<em> cologne ads were supposed to be."

"Don't take advice from Marly," Axel said, buttoning his shirt, "Sexy is his specialty. If any one person came close to turning this place into a playboy mansion, it was him. Almost had Leon convinced, too."

"I won't have to be taking any _nudes,_ will I?" Roxas asked cautiously.

Axel laughed a little bit, "No silly. Worst you might have to do is the occasional lingerie. Hope you're not too into girls, because Selphie, that brunette girl we passed on the way up here, probably has the biggest tits in the world. She knows it and she shows it."

"Are all of you sluts around here?" Roxas asked sarcastically.

"Part of the job description, Rox," Axel joked, clapping the blonde on the shoulder, "You'll be sleeping with the models in no time."

Roxas shook the hand off, "You're disgusting."

"Relax k—Roxas. I was just kidding. No, not everyone around here is a slut. And if they are, most of them are –ahem- classy about it. _I'm _not a slut."

Roxas snorted, "I find _that _hard to believe."

Axel put a hand over his heart, imitating Demyx for the second time that day, "Why Roxy, I'm hurt."

As soon as he did it, he felt terrible. He was definitely flirting. If this wasn't flirting, he didn't know what was. And not only that, but he teased him _exactly _the same was he and his _boyfriend_ teased each other. _Remember Axel! You're with DEMYX. That means ix-nay on the flirt-tay! _Even though technically he was allowed to. But he didn't want to. He didn't want multiple partners. True, he had slept with Larxene… or he was told he had done. He couldn't actually remember why he'd woken up in her apartment, the last thing he remembered about that night was going to the club with Demyx. And that beside, he couldn't see Roxas as a piece of ass anyway.

This would be a problem.

**I gotta say, I am EXTREMELY. PUMPED. For this story. You guys have no idea what I have in store, just for you :3 because I love you.**


	2. Mesmerized

**Le gasp! Look what it is! A brand new chapter just for you! At 11:11 at night to be exact. Right after my very first ever violin recital too, so you oughta be grateful! Just kidding, guys, I'm actually very grateful to you for ever reading this! On that note, thanks to everyone who favorited, added me to their alerts, reviewed, or even just read! Seriously, it's you guys that motivates me to keep writing this and get it up for you faster. *cough* and my lack of a life anywhere other than twitter and violin school.**

**ANYWAY! I'm rambling. If I don't update before Christmas (which I should, but JUST IN CASE) Merry Christmas everyone! Or whatever it is that you celebrate. Happy Christmannukawanzanakka(; **

"Babe, I'm home!" Roxas called as he shut the door to his apartment.

"I'm in the studio!" A soft voice called out to him.

He shook his shoes off and hung his coat up before heading down the dark long hallway that led to the studio. The room itself was much brighter than the hallway, in fact it was the brightest room in the house. He greeted the small, platinum blonde woman inside with a smile.

"Hey, Naminé," he said, swooping down to kiss her on the cheek.

"How was your first day?" she said, her dark blue eyes twinkling. She was painting a still life of some pretty white tiger lilies, and she'd gotten dried paint in her hair. So Roxas pulled up a stool and gently started picking it out.

"You would not believe the weirdo they paired me with. He practically ran me over with his skateboard this morning, and he always says the weirdest shit to me, and he calls me Roxy and I think he's _hitting on me!_" Roxas ranted.

Naminé hmmed sympathetically, "Does he at least know what he's doing as far as taking the pictures is concerned? Is he a good teacher?"

Roxas snorted, "He's not even a photographer. He's one of their models. He mistook _me _for a model. So did everyone else. He said they paired me with him because he's easy to pose."

"Is he at least nice to you?" Naminé asked hopefully.

"It's…hard to say. I don't think he was intentionally being an asshole. He's just one of those people. He's ridiculously sarcastic, and that being said I can never tell if he's flirting with me or not." He let out an exasperated sigh.

"What's his name?" she asked, turning around to play with his hair.

He flinched away. "You're gonna get paint on me," he laughed, "and it's Axel."

"Well, I'm sure you'll figure out how to make it work," she said with confidence, "Axel aside, how was the studio?"

"It was _weird_," he replied with renewed enthusiasm, "It was decked out in like, ancient pre Victorian shit. It was like some kind of rip off from that haunted mansion back home, all dimly lit. It's spooky. All the individual shooting rooms are normal though, modern. Enough that I actually knew what the hell I was doing. I swear it's like a freakin' playboy mansion though. Everyone in there is either gay, a slut, or both!" He finished his rant, out of breath.

"I think you're judging them a little too quickly," said Naminé calmly, "Give them more of a chance. This is your dream, remember? You got hand picked out of hundreds to do this. Don't be so eager to throw that away."

"I know that," said Roxas, suddenly filled with guilt and the urge to justify himself, "I'm not gonna wimp out or quit or anything like that. But that doesn't mean I have to like all the weirdos I'm stuck working with does it?"

"_Put your clothes on, I'm home!" _called a voice from the living room. Both blondes left the studio to greet the newcomer.

"Very funny Cloud," said Roxas dully. He and Naminé hadn't even kissed yet. They were both too shy to make the first move, and it amused Cloud to no end.

"Yeah yeah," said Cloud, waving his hand dismissively, "I'm starved. What's for dinner?"

"Cajun Shrimp Alfredo," said Naminé with a smile, "It's on the stove."

Roxas whistled lowly. "Damn, that's pretty fancy," he remarked.

"I sold a painting today," she informed him happily, "So I figured I'd splurge and make a nice dinner for everyone."

"That's great Nam!" Roxas exclaimed, "Congrats!"

Cloud, who was already in the kitchen, shouted over a mouthful of food, "Wow! This is great! Keep up the good work, kiddo."

Naminé smiled modestly and looked shyly at her feet.

"So, how was your first day?" Cloud mocked when Roxas and Naminé joined him at the table. He leaned across to ruffle Roxas' hair like a proud parent.

"Stop that," said Roxas defiantly to his older brother. "And it was fine."

"Any hot girls there? Or hot guys?" Cloud asked interestedly.

What a stupid question. "Of course there are. None that could handle your emoness though," Roxas shot at him. "Well, maybe Leon. But the rest of them are cheerful spazzes as far as I've seen."

Cloud snorted. "I'm not emo. Cheerful spazzes huh? Maybe they'll rub off on you."

"You _are _emo," said Roxas, ignoring the other comment. "I don't think I've ever seen you smile. And I've known you since I was born."

"I smile all the time," said Cloud, flashing him a smirk.

"That's not a smile, that's a sadistic smug-face," he argued.

"Oh _excuse me_, I didn't realize you were an expert on facial expressions!"

"_Boys!" _Naminé interjected, immediately diffusing what most likely would've become a very heated argument.

"Sorry," they mumbled in unison.

The rest of dinner was eaten in near silence, with the exception of the clanking of metal against dinnerware. When Roxas was finished, he stood up to put his plate in the sink, but Naminé stopped him, gently resting her hand on his arm.

"I got it," she said softly. He nodded and set the plate back where it was. Dinner always ended that way. See Naminé made an artist's living. In other words, not much at all. So she insisted on doing all the housework for the two sloppy men she lived with to compensate for the lack of income.

Still, Roxas always offered a helping hand, which Naminé blatantly refused every time. She might've looked tiny, but she had the will of an ox, neither Cloud nor Roxas had the balls to contradict her.

Having no further business in the kitchen, Roxas decided to go take a shower. There was a bathroom connected to his bedroom, so the area was pretty secluded. He grabbed some clothes suitable for lounging in from his dresser before heading into his bathroom, locking the door behind him.

He was starting to get concerned that clothes would be an issue, given the line of work he'd taken up. Everyone at _Poir _seemed to strut around in complete designer outfits in which the underwear alone probably cost more than his rent. It wasn't that he was concerned about his appearance, more that he wanted to keep as under the radar as possible. If what Axel said was true, it'd probably be best to try to just blend in.

Roxas turned the shower as hot as it could go and just stood under the spray for a moment. As his body absorbed the nice heat from the water as it coursed down his body in thin streams, he began to feel ashamed of all of his out bursts from earlier. Taking several deep breaths, he contemplated what exactly about Axel made him so mad.

Upon their first encounter, Roxas had immediately decided he didn't like the redhead. First he'd knocked him over: Strike one. He'd then flashed an arrogant grin and gave some kind of snotty response: Strike two. Then later in the day, he called Roxas kid: Strike three.

They were all dumb reasons and Roxas knew it. On the other hand, Axel had continued to tease him for the rest of the day as well. Then of course the question that had been swirling around his thought process for the better part of the day came into play: Was Axel flirting with him or not? It was so hard to tell. Either way Roxas was pretty sure he wasn't doing it consciously… and that beside, he'd commented on Selphie's body.

Roxas was starting to feel silly now. Seriously, Axel was probably straight… just a natural flirt. It was just best that he stay as far away from the redhead as his job would allow. The guy was bad news.

He tried to imagine all of his thoughts of Axel and work disappearing down the drain along with the water and let his mind wander. He thought of the movie he'd seen last week, wondered how it was birds flew, leading him to remember that one episode on puffins he'd seen on National Geographic once back when he lived in Twilight Town. As soon as the thought of his old home popped into his mind it wouldn't leave. He hadn't thought about home in a while, and as soon as he did a feeling of nostalgia ran through him.

A funny thing about Roxas was that he didn't just remember his memories; he literally _felt _them. He couldn't exactly put it into words for you how, but the feeling that he'd get when he remembered his high school days bore the signature specifically. It included little details like the taste of sea salt ice cream, the way the summer air smelled (yes, different seasons DO have different smells), the feeling of the warm healthy sun on his back, the pure simplicity of everything.

He began to miss his old friends even more. Hayner, with his almost ridiculous headstrong attitude and inability to wear anything other than cargo pants. He missed his chubby friend Pence and his good natured smile. His missed Olette and her upbeat nature, even if she _was _almost as bad as his mother when it came to unfinished homework. Hell, he even missed Seifer, head of the "disciplinary committee" slash town bully, and he had always been on their case.

All of the memories and details from his old town and old life suddenly came flooding back to him. Everything, his old house, his school, tram common, that old mansion they used to dare each other to go into on Halloween…

He shut off the water and stepped out of the tub, wrapping the towel around himself. After lingering in the bathroom for several long minutes, taking his time to dry himself and put on the clothes he'd brought in with him, he bundled up in one of Naminé's fluffy white housecoats and left the steamy room to find his cell.

It took him several minutes to find it; it had been hiding in the pocket of the jeans he'd been wearing the day before. He sat on the bed and dialed Hayner's phone number, mentally calculating that since there was only a two hour time difference between Hollow Bastion and Twilight Town, all three of his friends _should _be out of work and at the usual spot.

Hayner answered on the first ring.

"_Hello?"_

"Hey, Hayner."

"_Roxas! How you doing! Hang on a sec…"_ Roxas heard somebody fumbling with Hayner's phone through the receiver and could hear Hayner calling, "_Hey guys! Roxas is on the phone!" _Suddenly several excited voices and chatter became distinguishable as his other friends presumably were all gathering around the cell.

"_Hi Roxas! How are you?"_

"_We HAVE to come visit you soon!"_

"_Is school going okay?"_

Roxas felt a warm smile tugging at his lips as he tried to answer all of their questions as fast as they were coming to him.

"Good… Yes! You must!... Yeah, school's fine…"

"_How's Naminé doing?"_ Pence asked kindly.

"She's… fine." Roxas answered. Honestly he didn't know what to say about Naminé. She was just her same old self.

"_Me and Olette will both have time off next week you know," _said Hayner, "_I don't know about Pence—"_

"—_I think I can shuffle some things around," _said Pence lightly before Hayner could finish.

"Really?" Roxas asked, feeling excited already, "You guys… really wanna come see where I live?"

"_Sure!" _Olette reassured him, _"After all, it's just a train ride away!"_

"_Exactly! We need to catch up"_ said Hayner.

Before Roxas could reply Naminé entered the room. "Who's on the phone?" she asked curiously.

Roxas pushed the speaker button so that she could hear too, "Say hi to Naminé everyone," he said, instinctually a little louder since the phone was arm's length away, though it really wasn't necessary.

A collective, "_Hi Nam!" _echoed through the room from inside the receiver.

"Oh," said Naminé, a grin immediately breaking through her features, "Hi, everybody. I wasn't expecting to hear from you. What's going on?"

"They might come and visit us next weekend," Roxas informed her, feeling more and more excited by the minute.

"_Yep!" _Hayner added.

"Well that sounds great!" said Naminé, seeming genuinely excited even though Roxas had sprung this on her with virtually no warning, "you three will always be welcome here in Hollow Bastion. I should probably start getting some stuff together for us to do, then!"

"_Sounds like you haven't changed a bit, Princess," _said Olette. Back when Roxas and his "family" for all intents and purposes lived in Twilight Town, the gang always used to call Naminé "Polite Princess" as a sort of pet name because she hardly, if not never, raised her voice. Her smile widened at the use of her old nickname.

"_One can only hope," _Pence chimed in, _"can you guys even imagine a snotty Nam?"_

Everyone simply laughed at the thought of it. There are some things in this world, and every other world for that matter, that just don't happen. And snotty Naminé was definitely one of them.

"_Hey, maybe Xion can come too, if that's okay," _said Olette thoughtfully, "_Then we can have some girl time and go shopping, just the three of us!"_

"_Oh boy. Does anyone else sense a full on girl talk coming about?" _Hayner teased.

"_Oh, hush you. We'll have our girl talk later," _said Olette, "_and anyways, we should probably let you go, we don't want to keep you."_

"Yeah… okay," said Roxas, starting to regret that he'd brought Naminé into the conversation, "see you soon."

"_Okay, bye!" _Olette.

"_See you soon!" _Pence.

"_It's a promise!" _Hayner finished determinedly.

"Bye." Roxas hung up.

Naminé sighed contentedly, "Well that as nice. It's great that we can all catch up soon, I can't wait."

Roxas nodded, but he hadn't really been listening to her. He thought that calling his old friends up would make him feel better, a little less… he wanted to call it lonely, but that really wasn't the right word for it, since he had a family here. And they did cheer him up for a little bit, but now it was just back to this. Boring. He _was _bored, and there was no getting around that. Day in and day out, nothing ever changed. School, work, home, repeat. He really hoped this new job would provide some interest, and considering the goons he worked with, he had a hunch it would be.

This might not be so bad after all.

* * *

><p>"I'm home!" Axel called, tossing his keys carelessly onto the kitchen counter as he shut the door behind him. He always made sure to announce his arrival, just in case in boyfriend was… busy.<p>

Demyx wasn't busy, apparently, because seconds after Axel called to him he appeared in the doorway between their bedroom and the kitchen/living room, looking a little bit stressed out.

"Hey babe," he greeted tiredly, bouncing up on his toes to kiss Axel on the cheek. "I gotta go out in a little bit to replace one of Arpeggio's strings."

By Arpeggio, he was referring to his favorite instrument out of the collection he had, his sitar. That didn't have anything to do with the fact that it had a name though, Demyx named pretty much every inanimate object he owned. Including the bed, the couch, the toilet, and Axel's penis.

"You broke another one?" the redhead asked, a little bit irritated. He thought he had a right to be, since this was the second time it happened in the month, and they weren't even halfway through.

"I'm sorry!" said Demyx defensively, "I'm just trying to _tune _it and they snap!"

"You're overeager Dem, you gotta slow down a bit and not be so enthusiastic," Axel said lightly.

"That's not what you said last—hey!" he exclaimed when Axel thumped him on the back of his mullet head, "But yeah, I guess you're right. Wanna come with?"

In all honesty Axel was exhausted, and he really didn't feel like dealing with his perpetually energetic boyfriend at the moment; he needed time to think.

"Nah, you go ahead, I'll hang back here and get dinner started." It was just as well, since Demyx was a _terrible _cook and he knew it.

"Okay, but don't burn anything," Demyx teased.

Axel couldn't help it; he liked it food dark. "You call it burnt, I call it crispy," he retorted, retrieving a saucepan from one of the lower cabinets. To avoid a banter about the difference, he threw in, "But I won't. Pinky swear. Besides, it's kind of impossible to burn pasta, isn't it?"

"You'd be surprised," said Demyx cheerfully, "did I ever tell you about the time my mom tried to teach me to make lasagna?"

"Must've missed it, you'll have to tell me about it later," said Axel amusedly.

The sandy haired man skipped back into their bedroom for a moment, then reappeared carrying a colossal bulky case, which undoubtedly held arpeggio. Demyx might not look like much, but he was _strong. _Likely as a result of heavy lifting at a factory all day, he effortlessly swung his instrument back and forth, humming to himelf.

"It's like a twenty minute walk to the music store from here, right?" he asked Axel on his way out.

"You're not gonna take the bus?" Axel inquired warily. The area they lived in wasn't exactly the safest in Hollow Bastion.

Demyx seemed unfazed by this. "Yeah, I could use the exercise. Don't worry, if anyone messes with me, I'll hit 'em on the head," he said, brandishing his case at no one, "I'll be fine."

"Okay…be safe," Axel said quietly.

"Always," he said, swinging the door shut behind him, leaving Axel alone in the apartment.

He set the pot of water of the stove to boil, then went over to the couch and collapsed on it, sighing to himself. He wondered how long these feelings would last. The thing was, he still didn't _trust _Demyx. They'd promised to tell each other everything when they'd agreed upon the unorthodox terms of their relationship, and his lover told him plenty. But every time Demyx went somewhere without him, he felt a bit of fear swirling up inside his chest, like mud in a puddle after throwing a rock in it to unsettle the sediments below. The fear was always there, of a secret lover. That there was somebody else; that he would never be enough for Demyx…

_What a healthy ground for a relationship, _Axel thought begrudgingly to himself.

He wanted to be enough. He didn't want Demyx to screw other people. He didn't want to _want _to screw other people. When he _did _sleep with someone, or rather, when Larxene told him he'd slept with her, he just felt like shit. It felt like cheating, and he felt dirty, tainted. He'd never slept with someone else while in a relationship. One partner at a time, that was how Axel rolled.

Most people didn't know that about him, and he liked to keep it that way.

It wasn't that he wanted to broadcast himself as a whore, but it made things easier on him, if that makes any sense. Demyx was happier, thinking he wasn't the only "unfaithful" one, and when Axel wasn't in a relationship, but had a fuck buddy (like Saïx for example) he wouldn't make it weird by letting them know that they were his _only _fuck buddy at the time. Random hookups just didn't work for Axel; it was far out of his comfort zone. He'd only once ever even _considered _cheating on Demyx (while in his right mind). And it happened today.

And that scared the hell out of him.

He was completely mesmerized by this new kid. Who did he think he was, stepping into Axel's life and making him question himself, his relationship? Axel of course knew it wasn't Roxas' fault, as he was obviously not interested in the slightest. On the contrary, the cute blonde _hated _him. For seemingly no reason too.

But of course he had to look completely adorable while he was doing it.

Axel felt utterly disgusted with himself. What the hell was he _thinking!_ He didn't want to be attracted to Roxas. He really didn't. It was wrong on so many levels. He tried to comfort himself with the thought that Demyx wouldn't mind.

_Maybe this is what Dem was feeling when we first started out, _Axel reasoned with himself, _This attraction, it's beyond my control. I love Demyx, and I hope he loves me too. That much is solid. He's still sexy to me and I still want him. This 'want' for Roxas… it's different. _

He didn't like it. Not one bit. None of this made any difference in his mind; his morals were adamant.

_Just because we _have _attractions for other people doesn't mean we should act on them…_

Against his better judgment, Axel let his mind wander and conjure up several possible outcomes to this, should he choose to act upon his desire.

_Outcome one: I could try for him, and get rejected. End result: I feel like an ass and move on._

_Outcome two: I could try for him, and not get rejected. Tell Demyx later, who won't care. End result: I feel like an ass and move on._

Did Axel mention he didn't like this? He chose next to consider Roxas' end of all this. The blonde had made clear today that he didn't approve of sleeping around. He called it disgusting. Axel felt like he was wronging the kid even _considering _the possibility of fucking him without his knowledge, since the odds were slim to none that Roxas wanted him too. He could be in a relationship already. He could be straight. Hell, he could even be homophobic. He did make a face when Leon made that remark about Saïx earlier. But that could've just been out of disapproval of casual fucking.

Axel squeezed his eyes shut and clapped a hand to his forehead. This was much too confusing.

His eyes snapped open quicker than lightning when a sudden realization dawned on him: He _always _got attached emotionally to any object of his fixations.

_I'm not gonna do anything about it then, _He told himself firmly, _I won't open up the opportunity for myself to fall for anyone but Demyx._

He let out a resigned sigh and cupped his hands together and blew. He closed his eyes and tried to drive away any thoughts of the new kid.

After a minutes, he stood up and walked back into the kitchen, as the water was surely boiling by now, in search of something to make for dinner. He found a few boxes of macaroni and cheese, and looking into the fridge, a pound of ground beef and a block of cheddar cheese (Demyx's favorite snack). That was good enough, he decided. He could bring the leftovers into work tomorrow.

Demyx came in just as Axel was about to add the cheese sauce he'd made (because the packaged kind just didn't do it for him.)

"Just a sec," said Demyx quickly, running into their room, presumable to put his instrument away. Bouncing back into the room, he asked, "What'cha making?"

"Hamburger mac n' cheese," Axel replied, scooping up some of his concoction for Demyx to taste.

"It's good, babe," he said, hugging Axel from behind, "Call me when it's ready, kay?"

Axel nodded and Demyx pranced back into their room, and soon the sounds of a sitar being tuned began to float their way into the kitchen.

Finishing dinner didn't take very long, however. Within minutes the two were seated on the couch in front of the television, chowing away.

"Tell me more about the new kid," said Demyx after a short stretch of silence.

"Not really much to tell," said Axel slowly," He's kinda confusing, and he's actually a photographer, don't know what Leon was thinkin, giving him to me. Anyway, his tempers as short as his height, and believe me, he's short. And his approach is _really weird_. He told me to look natural in one of the shoots," he said it as though this were the most ridiculous thing in the world.

"Do you like him?"

He snapped his gaze up to meet Demyx's, "What do you mean?" he asked warily.

Demyx shrugged, "Can you guys get along okay? Think he's friend material? Would you tap that?"

"Umm…" Axel started. As casual as all of the questions were, he didn't want to answer them. He wasn't used to telling his boyfriend about _actual _guys. Usually he just made up a fuck or two off the top of his head occasionally to make Demyx feel better. He swallowed and pressed on, "I guess. Like I said, he's really hard to read. I don't know if he hates me in particular, or if that's just how he is. Hell, I don't even know if he's straight or not."

"Are ya up to finding out?" Demyx probed, peering at Axel over his glass as he took a sip of water.

"I… might," he said lamely.

That seemed to be enough for Demyx, because he didn't press the matter any further, he just prattled on about his day at his second job, the CD shop downtown, and when he was done with that, he picked up remote and turned on the television.

The rest of the evening went as uneventfully as any other. They finished dinner, cleaned up together, watched a few hours of cop shows on TV, then finally went to bed. As Axel lay awake, staring up at the ceiling with Demyx curled up around him, he hoped that tomorrow wouldn't be as confusing as today had been.

* * *

><p>The rest of the week had gone by without much progress on Axel's part. He was no closer to figuring out whether he liked Roxas in more than a "that thing is hot" way, nor was he any closer to figuring out Roxas himself.<p>

Their relationship was odd, to say the least. Roxas would _seem _okay, they could hold a halfway decent conversation now and then, and then as soon as Axel was beginning to get somewhere, the blonde would suddenly withdraw, as though someone had turned him off light a light switch, and go back to his usual moody self. All this ever did was make Axel more curious. Why was the kid being so cryptic with him? He _knew _Roxas was doing it on purpose, and he wanted more than anything to be able to pick his brain, see what he was hiding behind that glare.

On that particular day, Axel found Roxas as he entered the building, and he was carrying a rather large, very ancient looking camera. Now Axel was known to exaggerate, but seriously, the thing looked like a shoebox with a lens on it.

"Er, Rox? Does that thing actually run on _film?"_ He asked incredulously. Their particular studio had converted completely to digital years ago.

"Yeah," said Roxas, shooting him a glare. Axel noted that he didn't even bother correcting him on his use of 'Rox,' instead of 'Roxas,' and just went on to yell some more, "Is that a problem?"

"Actually, I think it's pretty cool," said Axel, who by then was completely used to Roxas' random outbursts, "If I weren't scared of breaking it with my infallible camera wrecking skills, I'd ask if I could see it. It's just that we don't have a dark room anymore, so I don't know what you're gonna do to develop those."

"There's one on campus I can use," said Roxas dismissively, "The only problem is I can't check to see if any individual shot is good, so I have to take a whole bunch. One disadvantage to classical photography I don't care for."

"Yeah, I'd imagine its inconvenient, not to mention a waste of film," said Axel, wanting the blonde to continue.

"Film isn't really an issue," said Roxas, "this is my grandfather's camera. Or maybe it was my great grandfather's first, I'm not sure… Anyway, he's got literally dozens of boxes full of film for this in his basement, so when I run out he can just send me more. When _he _runs out, then I'll really be screwed, 'cause it's like, next to impossible to find nowadays, not to mention expensive—" Suddenly he stopped himself.

"Where are we today?" he asked suddenly, changing the subject.

"Uhh," Axel checked the schedule, "Looks like were with none other than the boss himself today," he feigned shock, "room ten. Let's go."

Leon was waiting for them when they came in, "You two took your time," he remarked sullenly. The two younger men exchanged looks; they were ten minutes early.

"Is that an original Kodak Brownie?" the brunette asked Roxas suddenly, noticing the bulky camera in the blonde's hands.

"Uhh…"said Roxas, looking down at it, "Yeah. I think it's a No. 2, though. But I'm not really sure. It's my pappy's…"

Leon nodded, "I haven't seen one not behind glass in years. That's really quite something—"

"Yeah yeah, Squally," said Axel impatiently, cutting him off, "Can we stop oogling it and just use the damn thing already?"

Leon pinched the bridge of him nose like he did every time someone addressed him as 'Squall.' He'd adopted the name 'Leon' when he got into the modeling business. A very unoriginal name, in Axel's opinion, seeing as his surname was Leonhart.

"Axel, I swear, if you call me Squall again," Leon started menacingly.

"But you never minded when my _brother _used it," Axel teased, causing Leon to blush bright red, "he could scream it all night long, and you wouldn't say squat—"

"_AXEL!"_

Whatever Leon was going to say was cut short by an annoyingly high pitched, deafening screech. All three of them covered their ears, each looking as bewildered as the next.

After a few seconds of giving Leon a "what in the bloody hell is that really loud, annoying sound," look, he realized on his own that it must be the fire alarm. _The building was on fire._

Leon seemed to realize this too, because he swore loudly and yelled, "Get out! Don't bother trying to save anything you don't have on your person! Stick together, I'll meet you outside!" With that he ran out of the room, Axel and Roxas quickly following suit.

They both sprinted top speed down the seemingly winding hallways. You know how they always tell you to walk calmly, and not panic when they teach you how to react to the alarm in elementary school? Bullshit. When you know an old, wooden building is on fire, it becomes top priority to _high tail your ass out of there. _Though there was no sign of flames yet as far as Axel could see, he picked up the foreboding scent of smoke before long.

Before that moment, Axel never realized just how _huge _the mansion was. If he hadn't been working there for god knows how many years, he would have been in deep shit. Trekking through a maze of hallways with nothing but pictures for landmarks was hard enough as it was, and doing it while under the pressure of knowing that his ass might burn if he didn't take the fastest route out certainly didn't help that any.

Though he wasn't exactly in shape, the adrenaline pumping through his body and his long legs gave him the advantage of being a fast runner. He was faster than Roxas, and was a fair distance in front of him when the ceiling began to cave in.

The sight of wood falling all around him only drove Axel to run faster, the missing pieces from the ceiling revealed the source of the fire to apparently be coming from up above.

"_Axel!"_ Roxas called desperately.

Axel, with his instincts screaming at him not to, skidded to a stop and turned toward his name to see Roxas running at him, with burning timbers falling all around him, forcing dust and sparks to shoot up from the ancient rugs and setting alight all of the odd decorations placed throughout the hallway.

Things seemed to be happening in slow motion; Axel could see every flaming piece of wood drift to the floor, and Roxas, with tears in those beautiful blue eyes of his, trying desperately to reach him.

Axel spotted one particular blazing timber in shake loose and fall. _It's going to hit Roxas! He's running right at it! _His mind screamed to him. He could feel a new dose of adrenaline trailing from his chest all the way up through to his fingers and toes, but there was nothing he could do but stand there uselessly, his arm outstretched, and call, "Wait! Roxas don't!"

It was too late. The fiery object was now in freefall. Axel began sprinting toward them, knowing all too well that he wouldn't make it in time.

The debris hit Roxas on the shoulder, causing him to cry out in pain and fall to the ground. When Axel finally reached him, however, the blonde was already attempting to get up. That was when Axel realized with a shock that the wood wasn't burning anymore. It was black, and covered in soot and ash, but wasn't even smoldering.

He didn't take a moment to ponder it, though, as more and more wood continued to fall around them. His main focus was getting himself and Roxas the hell out of there in one piece.

"_Are you okay!_" He bellowed to Roxas over the alarm and the sounds of the collapsing hallway. Without waiting for Roxas to reply, he wrapped his long, spindly fingers over the blonde's good arm and pulled him up. They both started running again, this time together, Axel never releasing his hand.

After what could have been a lifetime as far as Axel knew, they finally reached the main hall, which was full of smoke and ablaze. The towering double doors were wide open, and several firemen were lingering inside, ushering people out.

Axel was just beginning to feel dizzy from the lack of clean air when they made it outside to the open. He waited until he was a fair distance from the building before collapsing onto the grass and coughing his lungs out. Immediately several medics rushed over and began tending to him.

"Don't," he sputtered as soon as he could get a good breath in, "take care of him, he got hurt." He motioned to Roxas, who was still latched onto his arm, whimpering quietly in pain. They gave Axel a blanket and let him be, as he requested. He sat with his arms around his knees, watching as people stumbled out one by one. He looked for familiar faces, in hopes that everyone he knew, and everyone who was in there at all, got out safely. He was left alone until he was joined by a petite dark haired man with a pointed chin, one of the models. Axel assumed by the way his indigo hair was styled that he specialized in the "emo" look.

"Do you know what happened back there?" he asked, approaching Axel. His voice was much deeper than the redhead had expected. He looked up to meet the short man's eye (the other eye being covered by long bangs) and shook his head slowly.

"Well do you at least know where Leon is? It's very important that I speak with him."

Axel shook his head again, "Sorry. He was there with me when the alarm went off, but he took off right after that. He said he'd meet me out here, but I haven't seen him. Gee, I hope he's okay…"

The slight man cursed under his breath, "I'm sure he'll be fine. Listen, if you see him around, tell him that Zexion's looking for him, okay?"

Axel nodded and Zexion took off, presumably to look for Leon elsewhere.

As soon as the model was out of sight, Roxas approached him, clutching his camera, his shoulder heavily bandaged. He was shivering, so Axel opened his blanket, as if to invite Roxas to sit with him. Roxas did so, and realizing how warm the redhead was, huddled as close to him as possible for warmth. Axel closed the blanket, gingerly wrapping his arm around Roxas, careful not to hurt him. He sighed as they both watched as high rising flames slowly consumed the building.

No one had told them what to do, or where to go, or whether they were allowed to leave or not, so they stayed put. Axel sighed contentedly.

_Wait, _he thought, stiffening, _Not good. My arm is around Roxas and _I like it _I should not be liking this!_

"Thank you," said Roxas, effectively wrecking Axel's train of thought.

"Hmm? What for?" Axel asked, genuinely confused.

"For saving me, doofus," said Roxas, cracking a smile, "When that thing fell on me… well, I'm not really sure what happened, but you helped me up and pretty much carried me out of there. I probably would'a burned if it wasn't for you… 'cause that hurt a lot."

"Oh…" said Axel, suddenly remembering the burning wood that didn't burn, "don't mention it. You would've done the same for me,"

"Don't count on it," said Roxas, smirking. They both laughed at that.

"Is that okay?" Axel asked, nudging Roxas' camera. Roxas just seemed to notice that he still had it, and he started messing with the adjustments. Then suddenly, without warning, he pointed it at Axel and snapped a picture. It clicked, and flashed, just like any camera should, though it also made a monstrous whining noise.

"It's supposed to do that," Roxas assured him, "but I gotta wait 'till I can get it developed to know for sure, though."

Axel nodded, still a bit flustered at having his picture taken for no apparent reason. He hesitantly reached over to take the camera from Roxas. The blonde allowed him to take it, letting the device slide gently from his fingers.

"How does it work?" Axel asked, after trying and failing to figure it out for himself. He didn't want to try anything without knowing what it did, since he was so bad with them.

Roxas gently lay his hands atop Axel's, guiding them so that he was holding it right. "Point and shoot," he said simply, tapping lightly on the large silver button on the top. His hands lingered on Axel's for a moment, but then he pulled them away, interlacing his own fingers and resting them on his lap.

Axel peered through the little window and focused the camera toward the burning building. He pushed the button like Roxas told him to, to his delight, the picture seemed to take. He lowered the camera. "Like that?" he asked uncertainly.

Roxas nodded his head and chuckled, "Yes, like that."

Before the little blonde could stop him, Axel quickly turned to him and snapped a picture. When he lowered the camera and looked up, Roxas was blinking and his mouth was open in shock.

"What was that for!" he demanded, his good old fashioned Roxas-glare returning.

Axel just laughed and handed the Kodak back, "You should be _in _the pictures more often, blondie," he joked. "By the way, I'll be wanting a copy of that."

Roxas' glare softened, and there was perhaps a hint of a smile tugging at his lips.

"You know what Axel?" He said, "You are obnoxious. But… you're alright."

Axel smiled, inwardly cursing his heart for doing backflips. "Uh, thanks I guess. You're alright too," he said nonchalantly.

Roxas gave a half assed chuckle. He opened his mouth to speak, but noticed that Leon was approaching them, so he closed it again.

"Neither of you are hurt, right?" Leon asked when he reached them.

Axel shook his head, and Roxas shrugged, "I got clipped on the shoulder by your ceiling, but it's fine, it's just a scratch. You don't have to worry about liability or whatever."

"Okay, great," said Leon. He turned to go, but then turned back to them, "Did either of you see anyone suspicious? Anyone you didn't know?"

Axel struggled to remember, but his memory was so hazy, it all happened too quickly.

"I don't know, Leon. I was just trying to get me and Roxas out. I don't really remember anything but running. Oh! Someone's looking for you, though. Says his name's Zexion."

Leon understood immediately. "All right. Thank you. You can both go home, now that you're safe and accounted for. I'll call you when we know what we're gonna do about…work."

"Okay," said Axel quietly, and the scarred brunette left.

Roxas shrugged the blanket off of him and stood up. "Umm… see you later I guess."

Axel took that as his queue to get up too, "Yeah, okay."

He stayed behind for a minute and watched Roxas walk off, simply to avoid awkwardly walking too close behind him after they'd already said goodbye to each other. The driveway was rather long, so it'd have been a few minutes contemplating actually speaking again. When the blonde disappeared from sight, Axel realized that he didn't have his backpack. His skateboard, hair gel, and change of clothes were all burning.

Silently thanking whoever was up there for not burning his wallet and keys (he'd taken a minute to transfer them into the designer jeans he'd been forced into before Roxas even arrived) he started his walk home.

**Denial, denial, boys(; **

***Fangirls glare***

**Don't worry! They're just confused!**

***Fangirls continue to glare***

**Just to give fair warning, this is going to be a slightly slow moving story. My intention is for it to be quite lengthy, because everyone knows that Romeo and Juliet is bullshit, falling in love takes time. So for you smut seekers, sorry, you won't find a quick fix here. HOWEVER! That doesn't mean there won't be smut, it's not rated M just for language you know ;D you're just going to have to sit still and wait for it :3**

**Although, the more reviews you give me, the faster I'll get it up here. Please oh please review my lovelies, even if you hated it!**


	3. Why Sea Salt?

**Hi readers! Merry Christmas! And a merry Christmas it is for me indeed! If you haven't seen the new eight minute trailer that Square Enix released for Dream Drop Distance, I command you to leave this page RIGHT NOW and go watch it. Yes, NOW. It's A-FUCKING-MAZING. Like, when I saw it, this was me: **

"**AHHHHHHHHHHHH *hyperventilate* *scream* *squeal* *fangasm* "**

**Once you see it, you'll completely understand why. I can't even think about certain parts with squeeing like the fangirl I am ^^**

**ANYWAY! Just for the occasion I made a super dooper long chapter :D hope you enjoy, and THANK YOU SO MUCH everyone for reviewing, subscribing, favoriting, and even just you readers! It means so very much to me.**

**Warning: This chapter contains mature content, but not the kind that most of you fans like (sorry guys, I PROMISE it's coming) but yeah, reader discretion advised or whatever 'cause some ppl wouldn't approve.**

**Okay I'm done rambling you can read now :3**

Roxas was freezing.

Like he was really really cold. He shoved his hands into his pockets and walked faster, in an attempt to both reach his destination faster and to warm himself up. He was successful in neither, but he tried his best to ignore the biting sting of the autumn air knawing at his fingertips and _not _think about what would make him warmer. He cursed himself for immediately clinging to any nearby warm object like a cat.

What was up with him today? He'd actually talked to Axel, exactly like he said he _wouldn't _do. He let him touch his camera, which he never under any circumstances let anybody do, not even Cloud. _And _he'd pretty much cuddled with the redhead, which he hardly ever even did with Naminé. It was out of his comfort zone, to say the least. Cuddling with Axel was not supposed to make him feel all melty inside. He was not supposed to be disappointed in himself for not asking for a phone number. He was _supposed _to be staying away from him.

He was drawn to Axel. And he could not for the life of him figure out why. He was in a steady relationship with the girl he'd liked since junior high. He was _straight. _Ish. He was content… wasn't he?

Maybe… maybe not.

He quickly pushed the traitorous thoughts of out his mind. Of course he was content. He had everything he ever wanted. He was going to be a photographer, a professional, like he'd always wanted. Like he'd left his home and worked hard to achieve. He finally had his girl, who he hoped to marry someday. He had his own place, and a nice one. The bills got paid. The rest of his life was already laid out for him. What more could he ask for?

_Stupid Axel, _he thought angrily as he spun through the revolving doors to the apartment building he lived in. After greeting the doorman and riding the elevator thirteen floors up, he would finally be able to just collapse on his couch and get his thoughts straightened out.

As if.

He opened the door to chaos. Before he could even ask what in the name of hell was making all that noise, he was distracted by a searing pain on his shoulder wounds; he was being tackled to the floor by not one, but four people.

"Roxas! You're okay, man!"

"Me and Naminé saw your building burning on the news, are you okay?"

"PARTY TIME! Didja miss us!"

Roxas freed himself, rubbing his sore arm, to see his three childhood friends beaming down at him, and Naminé, looking very concerned. That's right! They were supposed to come today! How could he have forgotten? What with work on his mind, plus Axel, plus having almost been crushed by a burning building, the thought had all but disappeared from his mind.

"Oh! Hi guys!" he cheered excitedly, "Yeah, it was completely crazy! One minute we're bickering with my boss, the next thing we know the fire alarm's going off and we're running for our lives out of a collapsing building!"

"Whoa…" said Hayner, his eyes wide with shock, "What happened to your shoulder?"

"Oh, right. Well, we were running, and this one massive chunk of the ceiling fell down and got me," he winced at the memory, his shoulder was still tingling, "if he wasn't there to get me up, I probably would've burned…"

They all had the same expression of wide eyed disbelief on their faces, except for Olette.

"Wait," she cut in, "You keep saying 'we' and 'he.' Who's this 'he' you keep mentioning?"

"Yeah, sorry, I forgot to tell you guys about Axel—"

He was cut off by a deafening squeal. Turning around, he caught sight of Xion, who'd just emerged from the bathroom, running full speed at him. Before he could protest or shake his head no, she tackled him into a hug with enough velocity to effectively knock the wind out of him.

"Xion!" he coughed, "Not breathing!"

She released him and started excitedly jumping up and down. "I haven't seen you in forever!" she shrieked, "I miiiiiiiiiissed you!"

"Hehe, missed you too, Xi," he said, grinning. No matter how annoying she might be, it was impossible to stay mad around Xion. She maintained such a strong aura of happy bubbly-ness, she could probably turn the scrooge into Santa Claus.

"Me and Xion are gonna go out shopping," said Naminé, "to catch up, you know? I don't what time Cloud will be home, but you know how he is when he's hungry. When he gets in you guys can order a pizza or something, right?"

Roxas nodded.

"Do you want to come too, Ollie?" Xion asked, sweeping her black hair out of her eyes.

"No, that's okay," Olette replied serenely, "I'll hang back with the boys."

Xion snorted, "Always the tomboy. Well! Okie dokie then! C'mon, Nam, let's go!" She took the blonde girl by the arm and started dragging her towards the door. Naminé shot them a little apologetic smile before the hyper active raven haired girl slammed the door shut behind them.

"Heh, guess nothing changes," said Hayner, "She's still a sweetie, and you're still a shrimp," he teased, rearing up to tower over Roxas.

"And you're still a douche," Roxas joked, punching Hayner in the gut. But Hayner was right. None of them appeared to have changed much. Olette's hair still fell in loose, brown ringlet curls, her green eyes clashed dramatically with the orange coat she still had on, which was probably accompanied with more orange underneath; Hayner's sandy blonde hair was still scraggly and crazy as always. And Pence, the oldest of the three, sporting his favorite 'mad dogs' T shirt over a forming pot belly. Roxas felt his heart swell a bit as a familiar sense of fondness washed over him. He really had missed them all.

"Gee, thanks," said Hayner, returning his punch in the gut, though his was much lighter, as he was trying not to hurt Roxas in case he was injured anywhere else, "And I brought you a present and everything!"

"Huh?" Roxas asked, confused, "What—?"

"Well, with Naminé around and everything," Pence started, "and since Olette isn't a bother about it anymore, we figured you'd appreciate it if you brought you some…" he paused for dramatic effect as Olette reached into her purse.

"Ta-da!" said Olette in a singsong voice, holding up a familiar small orange knapsack, "Just like old time!"

Roxas recognized the knapsack immediately. Olette made it when they were in high school, when they weren't quite as innocent as they made themselves out to be. After Seifer and his gang found out about their 'habits,' she made it for the purposed of carrying their…

"You guys are the fucking greatest," said Roxas, grinning ear to ear in a way that made him look like he could be the child of the Cheshire cat and the Grinch who stole Christmas, "Just like old times… well, come on! Let's go into Cloud's room! That's the only place to go where Nam won't smell it."

They grabbed three bags of Doritos and a gallon of Arizona iced tea from the fridge and headed excitedly into Cloud's bedroom, all four of them settling on his bed. Roxas knew that his brother would probably give him hell for this later; he couldn't _stand _it when people went into his room. But at the moment Roxas really could give two shits. It'd been way too long since he'd bonded with his friends like this.

"It's not the usual spot," said Roxas, stuffing a thick blanket into the crack under the door, "but it'll do."

His friends all nodded and Hayner, almost ritualistically, took a smaller baggie out from thick orange bag and carefully dumped the contents onto the first flat surface they could find; in this case, Cloud's senior yearbook.

Meanwhile, Roxas unceremoniously threw the window open and, knowing exactly which drawer to search in, withdrew a candle from the dresser, lighting it and setting it by the door. He'd done this in here with his brother before, and not getting caught was an art they'd mastered back when Roxas was in his high school days.

They all watched with greedy eyes as Hayner carefully broke up the sticky green bud. When he was done, he dragged one of his fingers over his teeth, not letting any leftover THC go to waste.

"Dude, it's good," he said, holding his thumb out for Roxas to repeat the action. Some would think it weird for someone to willingly stick their finger into their best friend's mouth, but for them, it was almost second nature. Doing this together all these years had brought the four of them closer than any outsider could imagine; they'd shared their laugher, their tears, their secrets, their dreams, their wishes openly to each other, all thanks to their good friend Mary Jane.

Roxas complied, scraping the THC crystals into his mouth with his teeth, and realized that Hayner was right, it was _very _good.

"Holy—what is that?" Roxas asked, unable to identify the stand.

"Golden Desert Kush," said Hayner, grinning, "Indica. Imported straight from Agrabah. Paper or piece?"

A standard enough question, but Roxas loved hearing it nonetheless, it brought back so many happy memories.

"Piece," he said, a wide grin already forming

Olette drew a little glass bowl from the sack, the very same one (orange, of course) that Roxas bought for her on her eighteenth birthday, and started packing the leaves as delicately and methodically as Hayner had broken them up.

When she was finally done, after what seemed like hours to Roxas, she handed the glass pipe to Roxas. "Green hit's yours, buddy," she said, smiling.

"Thanks," said Roxas, taking it, careful not to spill any. Hayner handed him a lighter. He took it, clicked it, lowered it to the green, and inhaled deeply.

It was harsh, but not harsh enough to make him cough. He made a face and held it in, passing the pipe to the left, back to Olette.

He coughed on exhale well after Olette was done, making them all giggle. He took a long swig of the iced tea, trying to sooth the dry, burning sensation that had spread from the back of his throat, down his esophagus down to his lungs.

"That—was _harsh_," he gasped, clearing his throat.

"Maybe if you weren't trying to be super lungs, it wouldn't be as rough," Hayner joked, waiting for Pence to finish.

"I wanna get the most I can out of this," said Roxas, sighing, "It's been _forever _since I could just let loose and have fun like this."

"Women," said Pence on exhale, "Like Naminé's cool and everything, but she's seriously got you pussy whipped."

Olette cleared her throat. "Tell me about Axel," she commanded, probably trying to steer the conversation away from becoming a sexist rant about women.

"Oh yeah," said Roxas, "Umm Axel… Well…he's weird. He treats me like a kid, except _not _at the same time. He has like these pet names for me, he'll tease me and then be serious—" he shut himself up before he said something else dumb. He was semi consciously aware that he sounded like a teenaged girl whining about her silly little crush.

He took a second hit to cover up the sudden silence.

"Ooh, sounds like you _like _him," said Pence, giggling. He said it in the weirdest tone, Roxas could help but laugh and cough, hard.

The room remained full of their conjoined laugher: Hayner's loud guffaws, Pence's throaty and belly jiggling, Olette's high and tinkling. Apparently the weed was taking its effects already.

"H-h-hey!" Roxas coughed, trying to hold back his laughter so he could be annoyed, "No-ho fair!"

Olette had already taken the bowl from him, and was now flaunting it in his face as she inhaled. He jerkily attempted to snatch it away from her, but she leaned back, out of his reach, only to end up leaning too far back than she intended. She lost her balance and whacked her head against the headboard, causing them all to laugh again.

"Uhh, wuh-hut were we talking about again?" Hayner asked, chuckling.

"Roxas' new boooooooyyfrieeeeeeeend, remember?" said Pence.

"Shut up, he's not my boyfriend!" Roxas snapped, "I'm with Naminé remember? Just because he flirts and he's sooooooooo cute~" he clapped a hand over his mouth. Did he seriously just fuckin say that!

There was a chorus of "Oooooooohh," from his three friends as it registered to them what he said.

"Wait, he flirts? _How _cute is he? Do you _like _him!" Olette probed, her now hazy green eyes staring hard at him.

"Sorry…"Roxas muttered quietly to her eyes, "You'll never be as green as his…"

"Hmm?"

"I don't even know if he flirts," said Roxas quickly, "like he does, but I don't know if it's uhh—umm… what's that word…" he trailed off, unable to remember the word he was looking for, "you know, that word that starts with I… it means on purpose," he laughed, clutching his head, "and yeah, he's like, _hot. _I mean, duh, he's a model!"

_Umm what! _The small bit of rational mind he had left screamed at him, _What the hell are you talking about? He's a dude! A weird looking dude!_

"But like," he continued, "he's got these weird-ass tattoos on his face, and his _hair…_ it's just ridiculous. Actually, he's just ridiculous in general."

"What's his hair look like?" asked Pence, giggling.

Roxas struggled to think of a way to describe Axel's messy red spikes, "It looks like… uhh, like… it looks like that porcupine! You know? The blue one! That cartoon one that runs around like a motherfucker and collects the rings!"

"You mean Sonic?" Hayner corrected, "dude, he's a _hedgehog _though!" He thumped Roxas on the back.

"He looks like a hedgehog!" Pence asked incredulously, widening his eyes. That in itself was such a comical sight, Roxas couldn't help but start up another fit of laughter.

"No! No no no no don't be ridiculous!" he said, mayber louder than he had to, "J-ju-hust his—haha-hair! Like it's all spikey, you know? It sticks up all over the place, even worse than mine! Except obviously it's not blue, it's red, so I guess he looks more like Fists or whatever his name is—"

"What does Sonic used the rings for?" Olette interjected.

Silence.

After a minute or so pondering this, Hayner suddenly realized something, "Hey! Hey, hey hey, who's turn is it?" he demanded.

"I have it," said Roxas, discovering it sitting almost forgotten in the palm of his hand. He quickly brought it to his lips and lit it, unsure if it was still even his turn or not.

"Well hurry up! It's been like ten minutes!"

"You just went, Hayner. We haven't even been at it for ten minutes," Pence pointed out.

"Let's open the doritos!"

They didn't talk for a few minutes, the only sounds filling the room was the click of the lighter, and the almost obnoxiously loud sound of the chips. Eating chips was starting to sound like a really good idea to Roxas. He smiled to himself and allowed himself to zone out as the familiar high feeling settled in him. Fortunately, he'd chosen to sit near the headboard, though Olette was taking up most of that space, he was able to lean his head back just far enough to rest against the wood.

Roxas nearly jumped out of his skin when the door burst open. They'd forgotten to lock it.

Cloud stood in the doorway. He took one look around, caught sight of what they were doing, and clapped his hand to his forehead, letting out a frustrated and slightly disappointed sigh.

"Shut the door!" Roxas shouted.

"Umm Roxas?" said Pence, ignoring his order and looking back and forth between him and Cloud utterly bemused, "Why are there two of you in here?"

"That's my brother, you doofus!" said Roxas, giving his friend's shoulder a good whack, "I have one of those you know."

"Guys! Hide it!" Hayner whispered loudly, flailing his arms.

But Olette knew better, "It's no use, Hayner," she said gently.

Cloud leaned up against the door frame and groaned. "I will pretend that you're not all getting stoned off your asses like closet smoking school kids _in my room_," he grumbled, "_IF _you share with me." He smirked smugly. After all, they really couldn't say no.

Being the friendly stoners they were though, it wasn't like they actually wanted to. One of the most commonly accepted rules of stoner etiquette: The more the merrier.

"Hell yeah!" said Hayner, bouncing up and down a little, "Step right up!"

"_Careful Hayner!_" said Pence seriously, "Don't spill it!"

Cloud took a seat with them, and Olette, who somehow managed to let herself completely zone out against the wall in the thirty seconds it had been since she'd last spoken, moved her hand just a little closer to him, offering the bowl. He took it and examined it.

"Uhh, guys? How long have you been trying to smoke this? It's completely beat."

Roxas spoke up, "I don't know, but here, take this." He passed his brother the bud covered yearbook, "and _you forgot to do the door!"_ he exclaimed, shooting off the bed and stumbling over to the door to fix the blanket himself.

"Relax, you're such a paranoid parrot when you're high," said Pence calmly, waving his hand, "they're gonna be gone for hours."

They all watched as Cloud took his first hit.

"Holy!" he exclaimed, cougher even harder than Roxas did and making them all laugh at him. He handed off to Roxas and propped himself up on his elbows, as he wasn't fortunate enough to obtain a seat up against the wall.

"What _is _that!" he asked incredulously, recognizing the almost immediate effects that this particular strain seemed to carry.

"Agrabah strain from Indica," said Hayner. He caught his mistake and quickly tried to correct it, "oops! I mean, uhh, well you know—"

"Yeah yeah, I got it, don't hurt yourself," Cloud scoffed.

Roxas felt great. This feather light feeling of total contentment seemed to wash over him. Everything was okay. There wasn't anything wrong in his world. Not right now. He hadn't felt this happy and carefree in a long time.

"Thanks you guys. You're so completely awesome. Naminé would never have stood for this…"

"She's totally got you whipped," said Cloud.

"That's what I said!" Pence exclaimed.

Cloud, apparently feeling the need to embarrass Roxas further, continued, "He doesn't even get any. Have you guys ever even gotten to first base, like one time?"

"Shut up," said Roxas. It was lame of him, but seeing as Cloud was right, there really wasn't anything better he could have said in his defense.

"Whoa, she hasn't even kissed you yet? ~Awkward," Hayner sung, "What are you guys, in middle school? Got a no touching below the waist rule too? No wonder you're so stressed out! Maybe you _should _go for dream boy."

"Who's dream boy?" asked Cloud warily, eyeing Roxas.

Roxas huffed at their inability to just let this go, "These goons are all under the impression that I have a crush on Axel."

Cloud burst into laughter. It was an odd sound, Roxas was unsure if he'd ever actually heard it before. In the nineteen years and however many months he'd known the man, the only "laugh" he'd ever really heard was a half assed little chuckle, which sounded more like a 'hmph' anyway. Even his laugh was emo. Not now though. Now it was coming full stream, a deep, throaty laugh, accompanied by, _holy shit, _an actual smile.

"Who are you, and what have you done with my brother!" Roxas demanded.

"You know," said Cloud between fits of giggles, "with that amount of time that you spend bitching about him, that _might _actually be plausible!"

"That's ridiculous," said Roxas, "I've liked Naminé since I was a little kid. Since before she even had tits! What are you smoking? …Oh yeah," he snorted, "Seriously though. I really really like her. With all the years I spent pining after her, I think that's kind of a given."

"Puppy love. C'mon Rox, it's obvious that you're bored with her," said Cloud, "it's practically oozing off you."

Before Roxas could question whether this was 'try to uproot Roxas' life' day, an image burst into his head of himself covered in ooze. What color would boredom be? He didn't know, but after a few seconds he decided that he looked best decked out in blue.

"Maybe you forgot, but I'm straight," said Roxas, "therefore your point is moot."

Hayner scoffed. "Maybe _you _forgot, but you and I had a thing in middle school, remember? Seifer was all over our asses about it? You're bi, dude."

"Whoa, you're right!" said Roxas, blushing at the memories, "I totally forgot about that!"

Hayner rolled his eyes, "You _liked _it," he teased.

"Okay enough! I do _not _wanna hear this," said Cloud disgruntledly, making an attempt to block his ears while holding a pipe.

"Oh, it wasn't that bad. Just dry humping really."

"_Hayner!" _they all exclaimed. The sudden volume seemed to rouse up Olette, because, completely oblivious to the conversation they'd been having previously, she jumped up and said excitedly, "Hey guys! Let's play Mario Kart!"

The next half hour was spent smoking the rest of what they had, and the next two hours was spent laughing at one another for pitiful DUI and cursing out those accursed red damn turtle shells. During all this, Axel had not come up again, and for that Roxas was grateful. He wanted to enjoy himself. And he did. He even snuck in his camera (after going out to the kitchen to get fruit rollups) and snapped several pictures, especially of Cloud; he was _really _funny when he was high.

Dinner seemed almost too mellow. By the time Naminé and Xion got home, they'd come down enough to pull a sober face. But not enough to the point where it wasn't a strained effort, leading them all to be super serious at the dinner table, which left them all with facial expressions appropriate for wearing at a funeral. Luckily, Naminé didn't seem to notice, as she was chatting animatedly with Xion the entire time.

She _did _approach Roxas after their guests left for the hotel they were staying in. He was in the bathroom at the time, washing his face and getting ready to go to bed.

"You seemed kind tense at dinner, Rox," she said gently. She stood in the doorway to the bathroom with her arms crossed. It wasn't a condemning position though, it was a relaxed one, "is something wrong? I thought you'd be happy seeing all our friends."

He shook his head, "No, I'm fine. It was just kind of weird, seeing them all again after so much has changed." He could practically taste the lie rolling off his tongue, and he hoped to God that Cloud wouldn't say anything to her.

"I understand," she said, her tone honest and clear. She walked up behind him and hugged him. "Are you coming to bed soon?"

He nodded, "Yeah, be there in a minute."

As silly as it sounded, the couple did share a bed, though it was more due to space issues than anything else. Since they were the couple Cloud appointed them the master bedroom (which wasn't really his call, since the apartment was under Roxas' name) and was very blunt in telling them he wanted his own bedroom so that he could bring home girls (or guys.)

Not that he ever did. Roxas knew that his brother was almost as inactive as he was; he was much shyer than he made himself out to be. Still, being a bartender, he had to keep his options open.

Roxas threw on some flannel pants, brushed his teeth, and reentered the bedroom. Naminé was already in bed, reading one of those crappy love stories that always seemed to have the exact same cover on it no matter how many different ones there were.

"Are you sure you're okay?" she asked, looking up momentarily from her read.

He climbed into bed, fluffed up his pillow, and buried himself under all of the blankets, plus the thick comforter; he was still cold.

"Yeah," he mumbled, sleep began to take him much more quickly than he'd anticipated, "I'm fine."

* * *

><p>Axel woke up early, for once, before his alarm clock even went off. It wasn't until he was showered, dressed, and halfway through his first cup of coffee before he remembered that his "office" had burned down, therefore he had no work to go to that day. He put his head down on the table and groaned, knowing that he wouldn't possibly be able to go back to bed, now that he was fully awake and caffeinated.<p>

What really struck him was that he wasn't sure what to do with his day (or days) off. It was a Tuesday, so naturally everybody would be working. He and Demyx both had weekends off, so most of their free time, obviously, was spent together.

Was he a bad person for wishing he could hang out with Roxas?

He decided to start by cooking himself breakfast, a _real _breakfast, for once. He killed nearly forty-five minutes making pancakes, very carefully, trying his very hardest not to burn them. Though he only actually ate three, he knew Demyx would eat any leftovers, he _loved _making peanut butter and banana sandwiches out of them.

Axel next decided on a whim to call his brother up. He didn't know what possessed him to do it, since phone conversations with Reno could last for _hours_. But, he was bored. There was an eight hour time difference between Hollow Bastion and Midgar, where Reno currently lived, so Axel assumed that by this time he was home. So, against his better judgment, he picked up the phone and dialed the familiar number.

"_Yo,_" his greeting came from the receiver.

"Yo," Axel mimicked, a perfect imitation of his elder brother.

"_Axel, man! It's been way too long! How ya doin', yo?"_

Axel couldn't help but laugh at Reno's slang. 'Yo' had been out of style for at least ten years now. Maybe in Midgar it was more current.

Even though he knew Reno couldn't see him, Axel shrugged, "Same old same old I guess," he sighed, "I just wanted to talk to you. Missed you, you know?"

"_D'awe, missed you too little bro,"_ said Reno in an almost mocking tone, "_You still with that tool?"_

"Demyx isn't a tool," Axel said crossly. This was precisely why he usually avoided phone conversations with Reno. Ever since he told him about the open relationship, Reno had it in for Demyx. Like Axel, he was a onesexual kind of person.

"_Yeah, sure. That's why he goes around to bang someone new every other night and leaves you by yourself to mope about it?" _Reno wasn't joking anymore and Axel could tell.

"He doesn't go out _that _much. And I told you it didn't bother me," said Axel stubbornly, "and how do you know I'm not doing the same thing?"

"_You act as if I don't know you at all! Plus, I can tell by your tone of voice. I bet you're sittin' there, tapping away right now, like you always do when you lie." _

Axel looked down to his legs. The hand that was not holding the cell phone was rested atop his knee, and, sure enough, his forefinger was rising and falling rapidly, tapping rhymically against his jeans. Reno might not seem it, but his was very perceptive.

He stopped tapping and shoved his hand in his pocket. "Well," he started, "If you'd called last week, you'd be right. But now I'm not so sure."

He didn't know why he was admitting this to his brother; he didn't even want to admit it to himself. He could hear Reno's chortling through the receiver, obviously not taking him seriously at all.

"_No way, yo! You're actually considering it!"_

"Yeah… and it's freaking me out," said Axel, not really thinking about what he was saying, just coming out with it, "there's just something about this guy… I can't put my finger on it, but I can tell that he's really special…"

"_Don't do it," _said Reno darkly, ceasing laughter immediately.

"What?" said Axel, confused by Reno's sudden change in tone, "Why not? It's not like Demyx would mind."

"_Because _you _will mind. And because you won't or can't grasp the concept of casual sex," _said Reno.

"That's not true… Remember Saïx?" Axel arugued weakly, knowing exactly what the response would be.

"_You might as well have been dating Saïx," _said Reno, _"Do you realize how easy you make it for people to use you? I'm not trying to be a dick or anything, yo, I'm just lookin' out for you. If you care about Demyx, which I don't know why you would, but for some reason do… ANYWAY. If you care about Demyx, don't go after this guy. You'll get hurt."_

Of course he was right. Reno was always right. "I know," said Axel slowly, not wanting to admit defeat, "I know you're right. It scares the shit out of me. It's like the more I try _not _to like him, the more I… sort of I guess I do."

"_Well, I don't really know what to tell you, man. Hopefully it'll just work itself out eventually."_

Axel nodded to himself. Before he could speak again, his brother exclaimed, "_Oh! Gotta go, little bro. Hey I made a rhyme! Rude is here, sooooo yeah."_

"Okay, see ya later. Love ya bro," said Axel lightly.

"_Love you too, and hey, good luck yo!" _

When the phone went dead, Axel sighed and put it down. Talking to Reno hadn't made him feel better at all. He knew that everything his brother had said to him was right. He got attached to people way too easily… He gave trust they didn't deserve. He became desperate.

The worst part was he _knew _just how bad he could get. He was afraid that maybe he'd already become attached to Roxas. It was a silly notion, since they hadn't known each other for very long at all. But… the blonde had enchanted him.

_Oh well, _he though, sighing to himself, _At least I won't be seeing him for a while; not until Leon finds us a place to use as a studio._ This was both relieving and disappointing for Axel.

He decided to take a ride to Barnes and Noble; books had always helped him clear his mind a little, or at least provided a short escape from reality. Maybe finding a good long read would keep his mind occupied for a little while.

He searched his messy room for nearly ten minutes before it occurred to him that he'd left his bag, therefore his skateboard, therefore his ride— back at the mansion. Looks like he'd be walking. Making a mental note to stop at the sports shop on the way back home, he grabbed his keys and left his empty apartment.

The walk to the bookstore was pleasant enough. Since it was midmorning on a workday, the streets were peaceful and uncrowded. Though to Axel's disappointment, the usual early-morning crowd of mourning doves was nowhere to be found.

When he reached his destination, he lingered in the doorway for a minute or so, unsure of what he was into reading on that particular morning. Not eager to stand around like an idiot for any length of time, he settled on browsing through the fiction section to see if anything caught his eye. He moseyed about until eventually his gaze fell on a thick-ish book with a very generic looking cover, sporting a red dragon.

He absently picked it up and started flicking through the pages. It seemed like it could potentially keep him occupied for a little while, so he settled on one of the cozy armchairs near the café and absorbed himself into the story.

It really wasn't that great, it was a story he'd read a hundred times in different words; a youth, unaware of his royal blood rises from obscurity to become a wise king. Of course not without the help of a friendly wizard and his magical staff. Then when the battles were fought and peace was regained, the old king would be transported to paradise. Typical King Arthur myth, with a few twists and turns here and there.

Nonetheless, he was beginning to get into it a little as the hero was caught in a battle to the death with his own kin, over the future queen; Axel was an incredibly fast reader.

"'_Argus! What lowly lore hast possessed thou to turn thy faith against his own kin?'_

_Blades clash, the shriek of metal on metal wailing, a cry, that could be heard throughout the kingdom as the young king prepared to make his final blow._

'_Twas love, good cousin. Do not despair as I strike thee down with thy own sword, that thou hast bestoweth upon me.'_

_A cut, a spurt of blood. The mocked and humiliated king fell to his knees._

'_Any final laments you wish to make?' A sneer. –"_

"Dude, why are you even reading that? The Shakespearean element isn't even _passable_."

Axel jumped, having been unexpectedly snapped out of his trancelike state. He looked up dazedly to meet a pair of cerulean eyes that he knew all too well. That he _shouldn't _know all too well. Goddammit, he couldn't seem to get away.

He shook his head; his brain general worked on slo-mo if he was snapped back into reality so quickly after reading. "Sorry, what?"

Roxas rolled his eyes, "I was asking why you were reading that crap. The linguistics of it all is pitiful."

Axel had to laugh, "Linguistics? Who _says _that?"

"I have an associates in English literature," Roxas huffed, "Sue me."

Axel didn't answer, as he was too busy zoning off into space once again. Roxas snapped his fingers in front of his face, startling him again.

"Next time I _will _slap you," he laughed, "anyway, what's with you? Did you catch that book's stupid or something? Are you high?"

"What? No," said Axel amusedly, "I just don't really function right after I've been reading for too long. It's like I'm stuck in a daze until I spend extensive amounts of time hanging out in reality."

Roxas nodded, "Oh… yeah, I know the feeling."

He loved finding these little things out about Roxas. There was actually another human being their age on this world that liked to read. He couldn't get enough of the adorably irritable little blonde. He wanted to know more.

"You wanna get coffee?" Axel blurted suddenly. He didn't really know where it came from, it just seemed like an innocent way to try to get to know him better. After two weeks of working together, he really didn't know him well at all.

Roxas blushed, shuffling his feet anxiously. "Uhh, I guess. I'm just here waiting for my friends, so I can't really stay long."

Axel mentally slapped himself for even asking, realizing then that he was supposed to be AVOIDING the kid.

He smirked as Roxas ordered some fancy flavored cappuccino. "Sure you can handle all that sugar, shorty?" he teased, sipping at his own black coffee.

"Don't push it," said Roxas, glaring, "I don't know how you can drink that, it's fucking gross," he eyed Axel's coffee with disgust.

"You know, once you man up and stop being a pussy about it, and get over the initial bitter of it, it's really not that bad," said Axel honestly, "It's actually quite good."

Roxas snorted, "You don't _know _good until you've tried this," he pushed his own drink across the table, "Don't know how you can drink naked coffee." Axel reluctantly picked up the creamy concoction and took a sip. It was so sweet it was almost repulsive. Like if you took Columbian Chip ice cream and stuck it in the microwave.

"It's gross," said Axel, "You're like, destroying the coffee, do you know how much those beans cost? It's only fair that since I tried yours, you have to try mine." He gave Roxas both of the Styrofoam cups at the same time. The blonde made a face.

"I think I'll stick with mine thanks," he muttered.

Axel made kissy noises as though summoning an animal, "Heeeeeeeeere pussy pussy pussy," he cooed.

"Oh shut up!" Roxas snapped. He determinedly picked up the hot drink and took a long. Seconds later he scrunched his face up and gagged, his eyes turning bright red as tears began swimming around the edges from lack of oxygen. Axel would've been worried if it weren't so funny to look at.

He thumped Roxas on the back, who was still retching and coughing.

"You're such a drama queen," said Axel, holding back a laugh.

"How—the _fuck—_do you drink that shit?" he gasped, "It's like, _impossible!"_

Axel took a large gulp of his black mixture just to disprove Roxas' statement, looking smugly at the blonde. "Say it, Roxy. Say 'Axel's a god.'"

"Psh, right," Roxas snorted

"Hey, did you get your pictures developed yet?" Axel asked curiously. He wasn't intentionally changing the subject, he really wanted to know. He wanted to see what he looked like 'natural' to see what the big deal was.

"No, not yet," said Roxas, "I was gonna do it today, but I completely spaced yesterday, I totally forgot my friends from out of town were coming," he explained. He glanced at the floor, "Does that make me a bad person?"

"Nah," said Axel, "One time, me and my brother were home indefinitely by ourselves. Since we were both over eighteen, legally they were allowed to leave us. Anyway, they were gummi engineers, and they were gone for like a month, working on some new models and conducting test flights. So, being dumb tweenagers that we were, the day they were scheduled to come home, we completely forgot and we threw a _party. _You can imagine my parent's faces when they came through the door, expecting a big welcome, and instead saw a half-naked girl lying shit-faced over the counter with a bottle of illegally obtained alcohol in her hands," he laughed at the memory, "Obviously it wasn't funny until years later, and at the time, I just felt _really _bad about forgetting them."

Roxas chuckled a little, "Well when you give me a story like that, I guess my situation isn't that bad. At least I don't have work, so we actually have time to hang out."

Axel nodded in agreement. Then, an unfamiliar voice called out, "Hey, Roxas! We're done!"

Several onlookers turned their heads, either shooting them disapproving glares, tsking, or even shushing them. They were in a bookstore after all. Axel turned his head to see three people that Axel had never met; a muscly boy with curly blonde hair, a girl with long, curly brown hair, and a round faced boy with black hair. They all looked to be about Roxas' age.

"Shut up, Hayner," Roxas laughed, addressing the crazy-haired ringleader, "you're gonna get us kicked out!"

"Whoops," said the one called Hayner cheerfully, "Who's this?" he asked, noticing Axel for the first time.

"Axel," he supplied, standing up and offering his hand for the loud one to shake.

"You're Axel?" the girl asked. Was that an excited tone Axel heard?

He grinned, "The one and only. Who's asking?" Had Roxas been talking about him?

"These are my friends I was telling you about: Hayner, Pence, and Olette," said Roxas, pointing to each one as he introduced them, "and as you guys just figured out, this is Axel," he gestured toward the redhead.

Olette beamed, "It's great to meet you Axel," she said genuinely, clasping his hand.

Hayner whispered something to Roxas, who promptly spun around to punch him in the gut.

Axel raised his eyebrows, unsure of what to make of the bunch. He felt like he was missing something, which he probably was. It was like being with a set of twins that could speak their own twin-made-up language to each other.

"He looks more like Knuckles, not Sonic," Pence remarked, cocking his head to the side and looking at Axel head to toe.

"You told them I looked like Sonic!" Axel asked incredulously, "like the hedgehog?"

The group burst into giggles. "Just the hair," said Roxas, looking shameful.

Axel ran a hand through said spikey hair, "Actually, that's kind of flattering. My ex used to call me Knuckles, and I called him Sonic 'cause he had blue hair. Plus when he got really mad, he'd go berserk and let me tell you, that motherfucker can run _fast—"_ He stopped, he didn't want to think about Saïx. They weren't even exes! "So am I the latest gossip in you little posse or what?" he asked curiously. He intended to know exactly what Roxas had been telling them about him. Probably that he was a crazy flaming homosexual.

"No, I was just telling them about yesterday," Roxas defended himself quickly, undoubtedly trying to hide a blush, "Obviously you came up, since you saved my ass and all."

"Not to mention he couldn't wait to tell us how _adorable _you are," Pence teased.

"He's full of shit," Olette interjected, giving Pence a stern look that reminded Axel of his own mother.

Hayner snorted, "Yeah, I think we've embarrassed Roxas enough for one day," he said. Then he addressed Axel, "Hey, do you wanna hang with us today?"

Even though Hayner was at least a head shorter than him, Axel was still slightly intimidated by the blonde. Even when he was smiling, his hazel eyes were always focused into a piercing stare, as if to say 'My word is law. Disobey the law and you'll get your ass kicked.'

Ignoring the alarms going off in his head, Axel hesitantly nodded, "Sure. I mean, if that's okay. I don't wanna intrude or anything. Not to mention Roxy gets all hot and bothered when I'm around." He winked, making Olette giggle.

"I thought you were done embarrassing me," Roxas growled. Hayner ignored him.

"Nah, it's all cool. Wouldn't'a invited you if it weren't" said Hayner, "We're going to see _Desert Moon _at the movies today. Come with us!"

_Desert Moon _was the latest blockbusting romance, complete with the floozy 'damsel in distress' actress that always seemed to be whining about something. And the heartthrob male actor that all the girls between ages 10 and 25 swooned over, that even Axel could not find anything attractive about. Not his kind of flick at all.

Axel laughed, "Really? I heard it sucked."

"Thank you!" Roxas exclaimed (quietly, as to avoid the glares they continued to receive for talking so loud), throwing his hands up in the air, "Finally somebody else sees it!"

"I know, right?" said Axel, "I don't think I'd be caught dead in the theater watching that. Sorry."

"Fine," said Olette, "We'll go in to see the movie with Naminé, and you guys can hang around the mall or something. Isn't it right across the street from the theater?"

"The theater is _in _the mall, Ollie," Roxas reminded her.

She shook her head, awestruck. "I feel like such a hick," she said sadly, sounding ashamed of herself, "Twilight Town doesn't have anything bit like this. All we have is a shopping plaza downtown at Tram Common."

"You'll get used to it," Roxas assured her, "I know, it's a bit overwhelming at first, but it's easy to adjust to."

"Who's Naminé?" Axel asked, looking around for a fifth head.

"That's his _girlfriend,_" Hayner sneered, thumping Roxas on the back. Roxas gave a noncommittal jerk of the head as a confirmation.

The tension hung thick in the air, invisible but obviously there, the way a room would get if one left an incense stick burning without opening a window or drawing the curtains. The smoke lingers, making the room uncomfortably warm and stuffy. Axel hoped he was the only who felt so awkward. He gave himself the disapproval stamp for being slightly disappointed at this news.

In a way, he felt relieved. Given the circumstance, it was obvious that he didn't have a chance with the blonde now, and it would likely stay that way. Axel was grateful to this girlfriend, whoever she was, for stopping him from doing something stupid and possible ruining his entire relationship.

Why did Roxas look as ashamed as he did?

"Ooh, lady killer, are ya?" said Axel, winking, trying to break the tension that had settled over the scene. Fortunately, Olette caught on quickly.

"Yeah, like a great big teddy bear," she said teasingly, pulling Roxas into a hug and snuggling into him like he was her favorite stuffed animal. Roxas pushed her off and looked at her with a half amused, half irritated expression on his face.

"Cut it out, Ollie, before Hayner blows a gasket."

Looking around, Axel could see that Hayner indeed was fuming, his hands balled up into fists. His wild, wispy curls gave the impression of steam rising from his quickly reddening face. As amusing as the sight was, Axel sorely hoped he would never be on the receiving end of that glare. Olette, however, seemed unperturbed. She approached Hayner lightly, almost dancing on her toes.

"Awe, does wittle Hayner wanna be shnuggled?" she cooed, laying one of her hands lightly over his arm. He jerked it away.

"As if!" he said, perhaps a little louder than necessary, "do I look like Winnie the Pooh to you?"

A sudden image burst into Axel's mind of the chubby golden cartoon bear with Hayner's hazel eyes, flyaway hair, and camo-military styled vest on, and that was it. He simply couldn't suppress the laugh that bubbled to his lips.

Roxas, who had remained perma-blushed and sullen this whole time, abruptly burst into laughter as well, presumably having conjured up the same mental image as Axel. Soon they were both double over, clutching each other for support in a fit of giggles.

"All—the way, dude!" Roxas chortled, wiping the tears from his eyes.

"We should probably go outside," said Axel quickly, noticing all the disdainful glares from nearby onlookers, "Before we get kicked out."

Pence caught his eye and nodded, "My thoughts exactly."

"Is there anything anyone wanted to get first?" Olette asked hopefully, looking around at them all.

"Right," said Roxas, "like Hayner knows how to read."

"Hey!" said Hayner irritably, "I passed high school, didn't I?"

Pence snorted, "You got a sixty six in English, Hayner," he reminded the taller boy, "Have you ever actually read an entire book, anyway? And no, Green Eggs and Ham by Dr. Suess does _not _count as an entire book."

"Yes," he retorted hotly, "Olette made me read fuckin Twilight…"

"Twilight isn't literature!" said Roxas exasperatedly, throwing his hands up in the air.

"It counts," said Olette crossly, folding her arms.

"If you say so," said Roxas, knowing better than to go against anything Olette said. He turned on his heel toward the exit. Axel followed, the book he had been reading lay forgotten on the café table he'd left it on.

Roxas and his three friends all joined hands and they all headed for the exit together. Axel assumed that they all must have been friends since early childhood to be comfortable with this, yet strangely he felt a little bit left out. They all looked so natural like that, fitting together perfectly. And there he was, the odd tall creepy guy following them.

He trailed behind them glumly, a third wheel, or rather, a fifth wheel. That was until Roxas craned his head around and extended the hand that wasn't already attached to Hayner's over to him. Axel gave him a look as if to say 'are you sure?' and was met with a reassuring smile. He took that as an okay since it was a rarity to ever see a smile from Roxas at all. So he picked up his pace up enough to catch up to the gang and hesitantly reach out to take Roxas' hand.

The blonde's hand was strange and foreign to him. It was a different temperature than his own, and obviously a different size and shape, though that didn't faze him any. It also wasn't Demyx's. His boyfriend's hands were cool, and sometimes clammy, because he washed them so often. The slender fingers that now encompassed his hands, light and warm, were completely unfamiliar. He had to admit it was a little exciting.

He glanced over to the rest of the group to find them all smiling up at him. Being at least a head taller than them, he imagined he looked a bit awkward tacked on to the end like that, but they just all looked delighted to have a new friend.

Just as they arrived outside, however, the brief moment of serenity was shattered by a high pitched scream of, "Who's that lanker ginger attached to my Roxas!" followed by a dark blur, and Roxas was gone.

Focusing properly, Axel see that the black blur had not been a blur at all, but a rather harmless looking petite girl, who had just tackled Roxas to the cement sidewalk. Ouch. _Was that his girlfriend!_

"_Your _Roxas?" asked yet another feminine voice, although this one thankfully was calmer. Roxas pushed the dark-haired girl off of him and attempted to stand up. Axel offered him a hand, but like the first time, he refused to take it. He stood up on his own and shoved the girl that 'attacked' him.

"What the _hell!" _He demanded of her.

"That kinda hurts you know," said Axel, running one hand through his flaming hair, "_I _don't think I look ginger." His hair was redder than a _stop sign_ for goodness' sake!

"Back! Back, soulless beast!" she screamed, brandishing an invisible sword at him. He raised his eyebrows and took a step back, losing about twenty-five percent of the respect he had for Roxas for dating this creature.

"Xion, cut it out," said the unfamiliar voice from before. Axel turned around to look at the girl for the first time, and in doing so, he immediately thought of an angel. She was short and thin, though not morbidly so, with smooth creamy skin. She looked almost breakable, like a porcelain doll, gentle and fragile. Her skin was very pale to the point where it looked almost translucent. She had light blonde shoulder-length hair that would make any of the models he worked with jealous. As if this wasn't enough, she was clad completely in white, everything from her flower-encrusted headband to her simple ballet flats. The only part of her that really stood out was her eyes. They were a deep, clear midnight blue. They were wide and innocent; child eyes, doe eyes. She was beautiful, and she was pure. Axel could easily see Roxas with someone like her.

"Thanks," he said, addressing the angelic girl.

She smiled at him, "No problem. Would you happen to be Axel?"

Jeez, did _everybody _here know who he was?

"I see you got it memorized," he replied, holding out his hand for her to shake, "And you are?"

"My name is Naminé," she said politely, "it's nice to see you getting along with Roxas," she clasped his hand in both of hers, "I wanted to meet you, at least once."

She released his hand. She was a strange one, he had to admit. But she seemed very kind.

"Well gee, it seems like everyone knows about me, but sadly I know nothing about any of you," he said accusingly, "you've been holding out on me, Roxy, I'm waiting."

He pretended to tap his foot expectantly, like his mother used to do whenever he was in trouble; when she was expecting him to fess up to something. Roxas rolled his eyes.

"You can tell him all about us when we're in watching the movie," Olette suggested cheerfully, "we'll meet you back at your place later. Just be home by six, so that we can go out to eat. Naminé already made a reservation at that Atlantean grill downtown."

"Hmm?" said Naminé, looking confusedly at Roxas, "You're not coming in with us?"

"They're too _manly _to go see _Desert Moon, _apparently," said Olette, shaking her head.

Xion started jumping up and down and growling. "But Roxyyy," she whined, "we haven't talked in _forever_!" she huffed, taking on the appearance of a kicked puppy. Roxas winced.

"You're not allowed to talk during the movie anyway. We'll catch u later, Xi, I promise," he said, slowly edging away from the group, "I'll se you all later, okay?" He swiftly kissed Naminé on the cheek, then turned around, heading back into the mall and ushered Axel to follow him.

Axel said his goodbyes to everyone, then followed obediently.

"Where are you taking me?" he asked curiously.

"To get ice cream," Roxas replied shortly, "You wanted to know about my friends, you got it."

He sounded irritated. Axel suddenly realized that the blonde had never actually opted to miss out on the movie ad hang out with the him, his friends kind of forced him to. Axel hoped he realized that it wasn't _his _fault, he'd just been reading a book, minding his own business.

"Okay…" said Axel slowly, it sounded more like a question, "How does ice cream tell me about your friends?"

Roxas turned around and gave him that 'you're-irritating-me' look that Axel was so fond of, making him shut up and wait.

"Two sea salt ice creams, medium," said Roxas as they approached an ice cream vendor. Sea salt? That sounded repulsive to Axel.

"Gee, Roxy, I didn't know we were to the point in our relationship where you could order for me," Axel teased. Roxas chose to ignore the comment, and decided instead to aggressively and determinedly tie his shoes.

While he was doing that, the vendor set both of their treats on the counter and held his hand out expectantly. Before Roxas could get up and do something about it, Axel tossed a ten munny ball onto the counter and took both cool cups."

"Hey!" Roxas shouted indignantly, scrambling up, "I was supposed to get that."

"You snooze, you lose, Blondie," said Axel lightly, planting himself on the glossy surface of the outer rim of one of the many false gardens scattered across the mall. Axel never really understood what they were for. It's not like they were much to look at, they weren't even real. The only use Axel could ever imagine for them was a perch for tired parents and ice cream eaters such as themselves.

"Why sea salt?" Axel inquired, passing one to Roxas and eyeing his own suspiciously. "I'll try it but frankly that sounds awful."

"I know," said Roxas, sitting next to him, "It's actually really good. It doesn't taste as good here as it does in Twilight Town though."

"Wouldn't know the difference," said Axel neutrally, "Born and raised in Hollow Bastion, y'know?"

He scooped up a small spoonful of ice cream and shoveled it into his mouth. At first, all he could pick up was the sweet taste of vanilla, but as it melted more on his tongue, he could taste a distinct salty flavor. But it was in no way overpowering, it actually enhanced the flavor. It was much better than he'd anticipated.

"Wow" he said faintly, "It _is _good."

Roxas smiled woefully, "This is our favorite flavor. We used to eat it every day… at our usual spot…" he looked so far away, "This really takes me back… It's like the embodiment of my childhood in this little bowl here."

"Tell me about them," said Axel gently. He really did want to know, the blonde was still a mystery to him. He told Roxas things about his own life, with the exception of Demyx, but everything he knew about Roxas he pretty much learned today.

"Well," he started, "if you haven't noticed, Hayner's a bit hotheaded, and if you ever call him a sissy, he'll beat you up," he chuckled a bit, "Pence is our peacekeeper, and Olette is like our mother hen. If it weren't for we none of us would've graduated high school probably."

"Are Hayner and Olette…together?" Axel asked.

Roxas chuckled again and shook his head, "You'd think so, but no. Hayner's clueless when it comes to girls. She's been trying to get through his thick skull for years. It's almost sad, really, he called _me _a pussy."

Axel just followed along and nodded. "How long have you been with Naminé?"

Roxas stiffened a little, and it didn't go unnoticed. "Since we moved here," he said quietly, "about a year and a half."

"She's cute," said Axel conversationally, "Seems really sweet."

"Yeah," said Roxas, a slight smile ghosting over his features, "Yeah, she is."

"And the other one? With the black hair? She seems uhh… enthusiastic."

Roxas actually laughed out loud at this, "Talk about the understatement of the century. She moved to Twilight Town from here, actually. A couple years before we left. She was actually the one that introduced the idea of moving to us. But yeah, she's crazy, and spastic. But she's a real good kid. And I'm pretty sure she had the biggest crush on me since Romeo fell for Juliet."

Axel scoffed, "That's a horrible analogy, Romeo and Juliet is such a dumb play. It's ridiculous. They didn't fall in love, they fell in lust. Romeo was just an angsty teenager that wanted to get laid. And Juliet," he continued, "was naïve. She was slightly more sensible but reckless and impulsive nonetheless. They knew each what, two day? Three days, tops. You don't fall in love in three days. You don't take your own life because of someone you don't know."

"You don't believe in love at first sight?" Roxas slurred, his spoon hanging out of his mouth. It was adorable.

Axel shook his head, "I believe in Chemistry. Two people can meet and click, like they're meant to be together," he took a bite out of his ice cream, "but not love. You can't just meet someone and be in love. For one, it's not possible, and two, thinking it is is really unhealthy."

Axel knew that was extremely hypocritical from him to say, since just that seemed to happen to him all the time. He was a hopeless romantic. He wondered why now he was choosing to writing off such ideas about love.

"I don't know," said Roxas, shrugging, "I thought I fell in love with Naminé the first time I saw her. But I was young, I think I was like twelve. I remember saying to my mom 'I'd never felt that way before,' but that was 'cause it turned out that she gave me my first ever hard-on," they both laughed out loud at that, "So I guess you're right. Love has to be built."

Axel stood up to throw away his empty cup, Roxas followed suit.

"Hey Roxas, you wanna play a game?" Axel asked, walking with his hands in his pockets.

"What kind of game?" Roxas asked warily.

"A safe one, I promise," Axel reassured him.

Roxas gave a noncommittal shrug, "I guess."

"It's called 'Never Have I Ever,'" said Axel, "know how to play?"

"I've heard of it, but I don't know the rules," said Roxas.

Axel began to explain and demonstrate at the same time, "You hold up one hand, and the first person says 'never have I ever' done… well, something. If the other person _has _done it, they have to put a finger down. You play until someone has all their fingers down. Lots of people like to say 'last man standing wins,' but that's no fun, if you're first to lose it means you've done more stuff."

"Does it matter?" Roxas asked, holding his hand up as instructed, "You go first."

"Okay," said Axel, "Never have I ever… worn high heels."

He glanced over to Roxas' hand. None of his fingers moved.

"What, you think I have?" the blonde sneered. "Never have I ever been to the zoo."

"What? Really?" Axel asked incredulously, tucking his thumb into his palm, "You're missing out, Rox. Used to be my favorite place to go as a kid. I love animals."

"I'm afraid of lions," Roxas admitted, "And tigers and bears."

"Oh my," said Axel, grinning. "Hmm let's see… Never have I ever… touched a drug."

His eyes widened when Roxas lowered his pinky.

"Really? Never woulda pegged you as the type—"

"Shut up," Roxas snapped hotly, "I'm not a _druggie _or anything like that. I've never shot up, never snorted anything. Never been addicted to anything, the only thing I've ever done extensive amounts of is pot… why the hell are you putting a finger down?"

"'Cause you said something that I did," Axel replied calmly.

Roxas whipped his head around, confused. "I thought you said—"

"I haven't ever done drugs," Axel interjected, "but that doesn't mean I've never been addicted to something."

"Oh…" said Roxas, his voice no longer angry, "What have you been addicted to?"

"People," Axel replied shortly, "It's not so much addicted as 'unhealthily attached to' but that's pretty much the same things as far as I'm concerned."

"You mean like, obsessed?" Roxas asked, his eyebrows shooting up. Axel shrugged.

"Not necessarily. Just like, I'd get really said when they weren't around. And they could attempt to _kill _me and I'd still try to make it work. It's not one of my better qualities," he admitted shyly, "Like I can't let things go, you know?"

"Oh…"

"I guess it's my turn," Axel added quickly. How did he keep getting himself into these things? "Never have I ever liked a girl."

It was Roxas' turn to be surprised. "You're gay?" he asked as if he weren't at all expecting it. He immediately put a finger down.

"You thought I was straight?" the redhead asked amusedly, "I play dress up for a living, Roxy."

"I don't know," said Roxas, shaking his head, "It's not exactly like you broadcast it. Seemed to me like you didn't exactly _like _the place you worked at. Plus, you did comment on that Selphie girl's tits."

"So? Have you _seen _them? They're fucking huge! That shit's gotta be fake. I was simply stating a fact," said Axel, "I have, however, as much as it pains me to admit it, slept with one. Something I never intend to do again, no sir."

"I thought you said you weren't a whore," said Roxas accusingly."

"I'm not," said Axel crossly, "I meant that. That night was… an off night, I guess. She got me punch drunk and seduced me. Or so I was told, I can't even remember it… But I do remember feeling really awful about it the next day. I'll only sleep with someone I care about."

Roxas looked at him apprehensively, "Well, that's another finger down for me. Because I know you're going to ask, yes, I'm a virgin." He looked away as if this were the most embarrassing thing one could reveal about themselves.

"Does that make it my turn?"

"What, you're not gonna tease me?" asked Roxas skeptically.

"Who you sleep with is your business," said Axel, "You're only nineteen. Now, if you were like, _thirty _I think I'd have to make fun of you. But we got a couple years of youth on us yet. Though by the looks of the little poppet you're with now, you won't be getting any till after you're _married_." He expected Roxas to get angry at him again and defend his girl. But he didn't, he just sighed.

"I know," he said miserably, "She won't even _kiss _me yet. Whenever I go for it, she just turns her head to the side so I get her cheek. I expect we'll have to go back to Twilight Town to get her father's permission before I try to purpose to her, should I even go down that road," he shook his head, "I kind of feel like an asshole," he confessed, "I mean, I pined after her for _years, _and now that I have her, who am I to say that she's not enough?"

Axel understood that perfectly. In fact he was beginning to feel similar about… _nope, not going there today._

"No, it's okay, I get it. I probably would be too. I don't really know how to flirt with women, but I figure it can't be that much harder than men," said Axel.

"I'm actually bi," Roxas admitted, "me and Hayner used to fool around a little in middle school."

Axel laughed. How could he not? Just imagining the muscular blonde getting red-faced and denying any kind of 'faghood' was enough to get him going.

"You don't say," he said, still smiling, "yet he seems intent on beating anybody up that would even consider questioning his orientation."

"Yeah, you probably shouldn't tell him I told you that," Roxas warned, "He doesn't like people to know. Something that just stays within the group, you know? Best friends forever or something like that? I don't know but it's like a pact that we keep each other's secrets."

Axel nodded, wondering idly whether that made him part of the group, "Hey Roxy," he asked absently, "Can I ask you something?"

"You just did," said Roxas wearily, "but go ahead."

"Where are we going? We've been wandering aimlessly through the mall for the last, like, ten minutes now. Did you have a particular place in mind?" He asked.

"Nope," said Roxas, shrugging, "I was gonna ask you the same thing, actually."

They passed an Abercrombie and Fitch, and Axel saw a huge poster of himself, shirtless, with some fake beach background plastered right where you walk into the store. He didn't have any tattoos on his face and they seem to have generously photoshopped him a six pack.

"I really hate shooting ads for Abercrombie," Axel mused, unaware that he was speaking out loud, "People print those out and _whack off _to them… fuckin' Marly.."

"If it makes you feel any better, it really doesn't look like you at all," Roxas commented, "It looks so…empty. Sometimes grayscale can work, hell, sometimes it even makes things look _better. _But not here. Here it's just a big blah."

Axel blinked, then suddenly realized that the blonde did not in fact have mind reading powers, but he had spoken out loud.

"Well that kind hurts Roxy. _I _think I'm sexy."

Roxas said nothing to this, but made a little 'tch' noise instead. Suddenly an idea popped into Axel's mind.

"Can we go develop your pictures?" he asked excitedly, "Since we're not actually doing anything right now?"

Roxas turned to look at him with a somewhat amused facial expression. "You're really into that, aren't you? Why? It's not the most exciting process, especially since there's nothing you can really do in there besides sit around and watch."

Axel shrugged, "I've never seen a candid of myself before. Plus this way I can guarantee myself that picture of you. I told you I wanted a copy."

"I don't even want to develop that one, Axel," he complained, shaking his head. "I just don't belong in pictures. I like to stay _behind _the camera for a reason."

"Well, that just won't do," Axel teased, "think you can take my picture all day and get away with it? _I don't thiiiiiiiink so._" He sang the last bit and grabbed Roxas by the wrist and started towing him toward the direction of the atrium.

"W-where are you taking me?" Roxas stammered nervously, his eyes wide.

"You'll see," Axel said, keeping a firm grasp on the struggling blonde.

Soon the large telltale water fountain structure came into view, surrounded by several small, temporary kiosks. Axel swept his gaze over the scene until finally his destination came into view; a small, dusty photobooth, the kind that spat out a little strip for people to take home. He started toward it, and Roxas understood.

"Oh, _hell _no," he mouthed, horrified.

Axel, still keeping a grip on the smaller boy, started loading change into the booth.

"Having nothing to pose for his out of my comfort zone," the redhead explained cheerfully, "so it's only fair that I take you out of your comfort zone too."

It was true; he really didn't like it when people took his picture for no reason. It was unnerving. To do it for work was one thing, or for a group picture on a trip. At least then it had a purpose. But when Roxas just captured him for completely no reason at all, just because he _could,_ Axel was taken completely off guard. What would anybody want with it, anyway?

He finished loading the change and swept the curtain at the entrance from the booth, motioning for Roxas to go in first.

"In you go, Blondie," he said, not trying at all to hide the grin on his face.

"Keep it in your pants, Knuckles," Roxas mumbled with resign, but stepped past him and took a seat on the plastic cushion nonetheless, "So if you don't like being in pictures for no reason, then what are we doing this for?" he asked, probably trying to dissuade Axel from using the booth altogether.

Axel just ruffled his soft blonde hair with his hand, "Just shut up and pose, it's about to take!"

Roxas quickly managed to shut his mouth in time for the flash and click that told him the picture was taken. The five second countdown shone brightly on the screen under the lens, and Axel draped his arm lazily over the blonde's shoulders, both of them better prepared for the second flash.

Because Axel knew that no matter who you were, what age you were, or what your relationship with the other person was, one cannot go into a photobooth without posing like he was about to do, Axel turned his head to the side and made a mock kissy face lingering semi close to Roxas' cheek. However, apparently Roxas _didn't _know that, because, alarmed by the sudden closeness, he snapped his head around to better see what was going on, and as a result, their lips smooshed together in a sloppy, shallow kiss.

_Click!_

"Augh!" Roxas exclaimed, scooting as far away from Axel as the cramped little booth would allow, "What the hell!"

Axel slumped up against the opposite wall and laughed hysterically, clutching his sides. "And you're—telling me… to keep it in _my _pants!"

Though Roxas shot him possibly the dirtiest look he'd ever received from the blonde, Axel made no efforts to stifle the laughter.

"It's not _that _funny," the blonde said disgruntledly.

"I bet that one's _priceless," _said Axel excitedly, "the last shot should've taken by now, c'mon, let's go see how they came out!" He slid out of the booth and hopped down eagerly; he could hear Roxas still grumbling as he too stepped out from behind the curtain. When he had fully emerged, Axel bent down and swiped the long, thin strip protruding from the machine, and they scanned it together.

The first picture was of an irritated-looking Roxas having his hair ruffled by a perhaps too amused-looking Axel. The next one was perfectly average, as this was the only one they were both prepared for. Both men were smiling into the camera, albeit Roxas' was pretty shy-looking. Axel liked that one especially. The 'glare' was cute, like a kitten trying to be a tiger, but in his opinion the blonde should smile more often. It suited his pretty face.

The next photo, Axel thought, was absolutely hilarious. His lips had remained puckered long enough for it to show in the picture, but his eyes were the size of dinner plates, making him look like a giant red blowfish. Roxas' mouth was actually open a little bit open; perhaps he'd been attempting to ask about his redhead companion's position? His eyes were scrunched shut very tightly, his face looking rather pinched. He looked as though Axel were a water balloon, and he was trying to get as little water on him, or in his eyes, as possible.

Adrenaline was coursing through Axel at tremendous speeds. He could feel that warm, tingly feeling spreading through to his fingertips, and to be honest it was kind of an uncomfortable feeling, it made him feel like he'd done something wrong. The tension crackling between he and Roxas seemed to have vanished completely when they "kissed," or at least, that's how Axel felt. Suddenly he found himself wishing he'd gotten a proper kiss from the blonde.

To his pleasant surprise, his thoughts were shattered by a small, shy little giggle. He turned to see Roxas staring almost fondly at the photo.

"It _is _funny," Roxas admitted, chuckling a bit. He lifted his gaze from the miniature Axel to Axel himself. "Sorry about—that, by the way."

"Are you kidding?" Axel asked, "This is freakin' hilarious! We couldn't have pulled off something this funny if we tried!"

"I guess," said Roxas, shrugging. He looked up and down the strip one last time. "I want that one," he said finally, pointing to the very last photo, in which Axel was laughing, and Roxas had his face hidden behind his hands, leaving behind only parts of a very red face.

"Why?" Axel questioned, "you can barely even see your face."

"That's the point," Roxas stated flatly, tearing the picture in question away from the rest of the strip and tucking it neatly into the pocket of his grayish khakis.

Axel looked at the rest of them, deciding which one he'd most like to keep. He pointed to the only one in which Roxas was smiling, "Okay, well I want that one," he said.

"Just take the rest of 'em," said Roxas, "wouldn't want Naminé seeing them, anyway."

"Ch'yeah," Axel snorted, remembering silently that Roxas didn't know that he had a boyfriend, something for some reason he'd been keeping from the blonde, "Or _worse. _Imagine if _Hayner _saw," he added.

"Oh the horror!" Roxas exclaimed dramatically, pretending to faint. "How much time do we have left, anyway?"

Axel checked his watch. _What! How is it two o-fucking-clock already!_

"It's two now," said Axel, hiding his shock at how quickly time seemed to be flying by, "If you gotta be home by six, we still got a good three to three and a half hours." He was delighted to see that Roxas didn't appear to be utterly horrified at spending the next three hours with him.

"Okay," said Roxas neutrally, "it's a twenty minute walk to the university from here, and a five minute walk from the university to my house, so we easily have enough time and then some."

"Sounds good," said Axel, nodding. It never occurred to him that that he didn't actually know his way home from the college, nor did he realize that he hadn't actually stopped at the sports shop to get a skateboard as he'd been intending on. He didn't think to let Demyx know that he'd be coming home late, and above all else, he was oblivious to the fact that he was falling for the blonde, and he was falling _hard._

**AN: Don't do drugs kiddies, they're bad for you. Okay well, weed really isn't but DON'T TELL ANYONE I TOLD YA THAT. *cough* as an ex druggie and occasional marijuana user I tend to include some kind of drug use in most of my stories since my characters are supposed to be normal people, with normal problems and come on, over half of America smokes weed. Anyway, I based the gang's experiences off of my own, but in no way am I trying to promote drug use. Just trying to make the story more realistic and plus how else would Roxas have admitted to thinking Axel was cute? **

**-insert witty plea for reviews here- **


	4. Amber Light and Bi Christians

** OMG I FINALLY FINISHED THIS CHAPTER *FF Victory FanFare plays in the background* Ugh you would think having all of winter break to do this I would've had like TWO chapters typed. But this one took so goddamn long!**

**Anyways, on New Years Day, after spending the week at parties I didn't want to go to, making art commissions I didn't want to make, wiping my stupid sick nose and finishing it off with a massive hangover *cough* I feel rather accomplished that I finally got this shit typed. HAPPY NEW YEARS EVERYONE! I was gonna write a oneshot for it, but looks like laziness prevails. Sorry ^^**

Roxas had to give it his all toward not grabbing Axel by the neck and demanding a reason for the strange behavior he'd been exhibiting for the better part of the day, and why that behavior was making Roxas feel so… odd. There was an unmistakable electricity crackling between them, Roxas could almost feel it shaking through his bones, rattling, awakening, destroying.

For him, it started when their lips met. That was the initial spark. The only reason that didn't deeply concern Roxas was because when he fell for Naminé, he didn't feel _anything _like this. With her, it was all butterflies, a brand of nervous that was sickeningly sweet, met with blushes and giggles, not the smoldering sensation that snuck its way through his veins throughout his body. He tried brushing off this feeling as much as possible. This was just the unavoidable awkwardness that would undoubtedly result from anyone accidently kissing their friend, wasn't it?

Was Axel even a friend? He was more than just a colleague for sure, given he acted so, well, _friendly._ Roxas would never admit it, even to himself, how he admired the redhead's flamboyant outgoing personality. Everything that Axel was doing to him brought him further and further out of his comfort zone.

It was infuriating, to say the least, to be rendered incapable of discovering one's motives. And it wasn't like Roxas could just _ask _him about it. "_Hey, Axel, why are you flirting with me so much?" "Hey Axel, are you trying to get into my pants?" _Yeah, because _that _would go over so well, since chances Axel was even flirting in the first place. What a trick.

He shook his head to himself, bewildered. He could not believe he just used the words 'Axel' and 'trick' in the same sentence. Or thought about them consecutively. Whatever.

In the middle of giving his mind a good scolding Axel spoke, breaking the stretching silence that had sneakily woven in between them. "Hey Roxas?" he inquired cautiously, "Are we friends?"

The question, asked so bluntly, left Roxas momentarily stunted. Axel was leaving that up to him? Or did he simply want to know what Roxas thought of him? In all honesty, even after knowing the man for some three or so weeks now, Roxas still didn't know what he thought of him. This was mainly because every time they really spoke or spent any significant lengths of time together, Roxas got a different impression. First he was just wacky and weird with his outrageous hair and tattoos, then he became kind of nice, and now he was acting like they were best friends or something. Then again, Roxas had to admit to himself that he was talking back. Conversations were so easily initiated, and could probably last hours.

"I don't know," Roxas answered honestly, still unable to figure out why the redhead would even ask such a question; all the friends he'd had, they'd been with him since childhood. How did one go about making friends? "Do you want to be?"

Axel shrugged. "People don't really choose to be friends. They just are."

Deep breath, "Then I guess we are."

Axel's face brightened up ever so slightly, almost imperceptibly, but Roxas caught it. Guess he'd picked the right answer.

"Why do you and your other friends hold hands?" Axel asked in a tone that was _almost _condescending, but not quite enough for Roxas to call him out on it, "Is that like a Twilight Town thing or something? 'Cause around here, it looks pretty weird."

Roxas smiled a bit, remembering all the crap he and his friends used to take from their peers about it, especially through Junior High, "Nope. That's just us. It's something we all did in Kindergarten or so, 'cause our parents though it was cute, and we never really grew out of it. I remember this guy I knew and his team of bullies used to follow us around and call us queers, even though we had a girl with us. It never really bothered _me _any, but Hayner used to get _mad," _he laughed at the memory of a red-faced Hayner beating up one of the cronies with a struggle bat, "That's probably why he doesn't want anyone to know that he's… I guess the word would be bi-curious, since he'd never swallow his pride enough to actually _date _a guy."

"I don't blame him," said Axel, "It took me forever to come out; everyone I knew, parents included, were pretty much homophobic. It was Reno that first found out, and _please _don't ask how. Anyway, we decided to come out together, 'cause he admitted to preferring guys too, though I'm pretty sure he swings both ways. It's not so bad anymore, considering my line of work."

This surprised Roxas. Axel didn't strike him as the type of person to be embarrassed or secretive about his sexuality, considering how outgoing he was. Perhaps that confidence came from being such a well sought-out model. But he wasn't really arrogant at all. Just… comfortable. He seemed comfortable with the world. Maybe it was façade. Everything that came out of the redhead's intrigued Roxas again and again, kept him curious.

"I don't really think of people in terms of gay or straight," Roxas admitted, "I know most people just _do, _naturally, even equality enthusiasts and stuff. But even growing up, I always just figured that people liked what they liked, I was never really told that there _was _a such thing as orientation until I got halfway through elementary school. I'm not into labels. When someone asks me if I'm bi, I figure that's just setting me up for a label. Nobody ever says 'that straight guy I know.'"

"I never thought of it that was," said Axel thoughtfully, "Nor has anyone ever told me something like that. But you're right, everyone else is just another person."

"I'm Christian you know," said Roxas. The redhead raised his short eyebrows noticeably at this.

"Oh?"

He withdrew a chain with a simple silver cross hanging off it from underneath his shirt. "Yep. Have been for a couple of years now. One time I went to confession, because I was told it was wrong for me to like another boy. The priest told me that yes, it was wrong, a sin. _But _it was just as evil as saying "Jesus Christ" in a fit of anger, or telling a lie. Or committing a murder…" he looked down a moment, "They're all the same in God's eyes. But every man sins, and every sin is forgivable. He told me that he didn't believe, as many Christians do, that I should die for it. A life is a life, even if it's lived in sin." He shrugged, "People label us too you know. Now I'm that bi Christian dude you know."

Axel laughed loudly, "Well, when you put it _that _way!" he said amusedly, "I mean come on! How many of them do _you _know?"

Roxas allowed himself to chuckle lightly, "Yeah, I'll admit it's a little strange. Sometimes I think I'm not doing it right, 'cause I don't feel the need to repent every time I see a guy with a nice ass. I still don't see anything wrong with it, other than my eyes cheating on Naminé."

"I wouldn't think so," said Axel, "if I felt like a dirty sinner every time I checked someone out, that would really suck."

"It's not so bad," said Roxas, "I haven't actually put much thought to guys, or even sex at all for that matter, in a pretty long time. I almost forgot I was even _into _boys. Hayner had to remind me. Though I was high at the time…" he trailed off, knowing he wasn't really making much sense anyway."

Axel shrugged, "Doesn't make a difference to how I see you."

"How's that?" Roxas asked before he could stop himself. Part of him was afraid of knowing the answer, whatever it might be.

The redhead considered a moment, then a sly grin spread wide across his features, "My sarcastic, short-tempered little blonde friend that takes pictures and has a knack for starting oddly philosophical conversations. See that? I just labeled you, shorty."

"And you're an obnoxious lanky ginger," Roxas retorted, smirking. "I'm not that short," he grumbled.

"Are too. Does the top of your head even reach my chin? Not including the hair."

"Look who's talking! You'd probably lose like a foot of height if I poured a bucket of water on you."

Axel ran a hand through said hair, "It's not _that _tall. And it doesn't go down when you pour water on it, anyway, it just gets… I guess pointier?" He scrunched up his face in concentration as he thought of a way to describe it, "It looks more like a porcupine than a hedgehog."

"I was kidding about that…" Roxas replied sheepishly. Axel clapped him on the back.

"Come on, kid, I was kidding too, jeez," he said, grinning.

"Pft, kid, _right,_" the blonde mumbled, more to himself, "how old are you then?"

"Twenty-fouuuuuuur," Axel said in a singsong voice.

"A twenty four year old porcupine," Roxas remarked, shaking his head, "more like twenty four going on five."

"As if!" Axel shouted, playfully elbowing the blonde in the gut, "If any five year old looked like _this, _the entire world would be questioning their morals concerning pedophilia," he smirked.

Roxas rolled his eyes, "Sure, you just keep telling yourself that." _Liar. _

"I'm the most desired model in Hollow Bastion, Rox, I'm allowed to tell myself whatever I want." So he was right about the whole confidence thing.

"Uhh, right," said Roxas awkwardly, "You're not narcissistic to the point where you like, fap to the mirror are you?" _Omygawd why did you just ask such a perverted question! Now he's gonna think I'm a creep AND an image of THAT is gonna come to mind… _he inconspicuously shook his head and tried to clear the (he wouldn't admit it was sexy) mental image that burst into his head.

"What!" Axel exclaimed, "No! Don't be silly. To be honest, I was completely kidding about the whole narcissism thing. I don't really see why people consider me to be so attractive, though I guess I never really cared that much to being with."

Roxas wasn't really sure how to answer, as he'd never given much thought to his own appearance, plus he was preoccupied with _not _thinking of all the reasons he could've given Axel concerning his, as he called it, attractiveness.

Thankfully, they'd arrived at his apartment building, so he used that as an excuse to not reply. He let himself into the lobby, Axel following.

"I thought we were going to the campus," he said, looking around.

"We are, but I gotta pick up my stuff first," Roxas explained, punching the button with an up-facing arrow on it on the wall to the right of the gleaming silver elevator doors.

"Oh, right. I knew that," Axel laughed. "Looks fancy," he remarked.

Roxas snorted, "Yeah, on the first floor maybe. A couple floors up it starts to get ratty." That wasn't necessarily true, he and his family were pretty well off in the unit they lived in. It was a pretty decent size, and Naminé's determined cleaning and decorating skills made it look very homey. If it didn't have a thirteen story view, one _might _mistake if for a small ranch.

Maybe it was just him, but to Roxas the elevator ride was tense and awkward. It gave him the perfect opportunity to mull over the day's events for the umpteenth time, and it occurred to him that he was showing _Axel _where he lived. Axel, who only days ago he was convincing himself to avoid at all costs. Yet today he'd invited him to hang out, had coffee with him, called him friend, bought him ice cream…

_Kissed him, _remarked the evil little half of his brain. The one he imagined would take the form of a little devil Roxas on his shoulder.

_It was an accident! _He argued with himself hopelessly.

_You liked it, _It said.

_Did not!_

He felt miserable about it. Though it really wasn't even a proper kiss, he felt the small pang of guilt travel from the base of his neck throughout his body. After all, he'd never even kissed Naminé! The guilt, however, came with another feeling, and it didn't go unnoticed. He could identify it immediately, coursing through his veins like adrenaline, the sharp feeling started in his chest and spread through his upper half until it ended at his fingertips.

throughout his body. After all, he'd never even kissed Naminé! The guilt, however, came with another feeling, and it didn't go unnoticed. He could identify it immediately, coursing through his veins like adrenaline, the sharp feeling started in his chest and spread through his upper half until it ended at his fingertips.

_Told you, you DID like it._

_Did. Not._

He opened the door to his apartment forcefully and probably aggressively. Maybe Axel would just think that he had a broken door or something. After all, half of the in the building were, anyway.

"You can come in if you want," said Roxas stiffly, stepping though the doorway and holding the door open. To both his dismay and delight, Axel mumbled a thanks and followed him in, graciously wiping his feet over the welcome mat to not leave tracks of dirt through the house.

"It's really tidy in here," said Axel, taking a look round, "OCD much?"

"No," Roxas replied casually, "Naminé cleans, 'cause she doesn't make much. She paints and draws mostly so…yeah," he explained.

"I see," said Axel neutrally.

Suddenly Roxas wasn't sure if he wanted Axel to see their studio. His own bedroom was probably less personally exposing to him than that room. He put his soul into his art, and he wasn't sure if he wanted those pretty green eyes seeing his soul just yet.

He mentally checked to make sure there weren't any pictures of Axel hanging on his clothesline before making his way down the short hallway to the room at the end. Without daring to check and see if Axel was still following him, he pushed the door open to the white room.

It was easily the brightest room in the house. The walls, floor, counters and ceiling were white, albeit stained with paint, charcoal, pastel, and all other messy means of creation. There were several large windows on one wall, letting the natural sunlight stream in. The setup of the room was pretty messy, there was no rhyme or reason to the placement of tables, easels, canvases, and plastic cabinets scattered across the floor. His personal corner included a table with his cameras and film on it, as well as a few memory cards, and a clothesline with several photos pinned onto it of several shapes and sizes. He had everything from polaroids to large glassy sheets for profiles. He had some especially good photos that he'd taken at work on the line as well, though strangely, he admitted, none were of Axel.

Roxas travelled through the maze of supplies to grab his Kodak Brownie and the film he'd been using on the day of the fire.

"Pretty…"

Guess Axel followed him after all. Roxas turned around to see him admiring a rather abstract piece that Naminé had completely and had hung on the wall. The smokey effect of all the bright colors swirling around and in and out of each other was mesmerizing; the design was so simple yet there was so much going on. That painting was one of Roxas' personal favorites out of her selection.

"Yeah, she's really talented," he mused. Then Axel did exactly what Roxas was so hoping he wouldn't. The redhead shifted his gaze from Naminé's work to his own. Axel unabashedly looked up and down his life's work, though he might as well have been looking at his naked body. He felt so exposed, like an open book. Axel surely couldn't have known how he felt about it, but it irked him knowing that everything he loved and admired about the universe was right there in the open and there was nothing he could do to hide it.

"Why do you have a picture of Zexion here?" was what Axel chose to ask, of all things, with a slightly amused and slightly 'im-creeped-out-' expression on his face.

The shoot on the particular day said picture was taken was a collab with Axel and Zexion for some kind of new punk clothing line. Both men had to wear extensive amounts of eyeliner and fake lip rings for the occasion, as well as some pretty odd dark clothing that Roxas recognized a little from high school. Zexion had really suited the part, and thought the emotions displayed on his face were fake, Roxas saw something deeper there. To an untrained eye, all one would see was a cliché black and white picture of an outcast in converse. But Roxas had an artist's eye, and it saw something different in this particular glint in the young man's eyes.

"I don't really know," Roxas admitted, "I couldn't explain it to you if tried. I just really like this one."

"It was a good shoot," Axel agreed, "I almost shit myself when they said we had to wear lip rings, though. Imagine me with a _hole _in my lipe," he made a face of disgust. "Not my style at all."

"Nope," said Roxas, a wide grin forming, "You're definitely an eyebrow person."

Axel feigned shock. "Why you little _shit. _I'll have you know I _burned them off_ as a little kid. The _nerve _of some people, making eyebrow comments like that," Roxas could tell he was kidding from the smile he was desperately trying to hide, "If we weren't surrounded by delicate works of art, I'd pound you to a pulp."

"That's what _she _said," said Roxas, waggling his eyebrows suggestively. Somewhere in his mind he became conscious of the fact that he was acting like an immature schoolchild. Where the hell was _that _coming from? Maybe it was the effect his old friends were having on him, since they used to act this way when they hung out in high school, as most teenagers did.

"And now you know why I call you kid," said Axel.

Roxas chuckled nervously, "Yeah, I guess sometimes I'm not the most mature of people."

"Yeah, my b—" Axel cleared his throat quickly, "My brother's the same way."

Suddenly Roxas realized the space between them. Or rather, the fact that the space between them was practically nonexistent. This was mostly due to the cramped space in which they had to stand in, but it was unnerving nonetheless. He hoped that Axel couldn't see his heart jumping through his chest as it surely must have been, that would be _really _embarrassing. He was starting to get extremely irritated with himself, and with Axel, for putting him in such compromising positions all the time.

Stupid Axel. Before he came around, Roxas was an almost-straight Christian in a normal relationship with a normal life. A boring life, maybe, but at least it wasn't so confusing! Now what was he? Now… he was a _bi _Christian, still in said relationship, with what? A semi-crush on some guy, a _model _no less, that he was barely even friends with? Now who was giving labels?

He couldn't believe he just thought that.

_Don't be stupid, _he though harshly to himself, _This is all irrelevant, because you _do not _have a crush on Axel. Remember your girlfriend? Your hot girlfriend?_

He would've slapped himself if he didn't suddenly become aware of where he was again. He stopped his thought process immediately with a resigned sigh. This would just have to wait for a better time and place to think it through. Though anymore time spent with the redhead was now potentially dangerous to Roxas' sanity.

"Let's go," he mumbled, scooping up what he needed and shuffling past Axel, leading them out. For a moment he pitied the redhead, his mood swings were probably confusing the life out of the poor guy. But then he remembered just how much Axel was confusing him, and took it back immediately.

The walk to the university was silent and uncomfortable for Roxas, just as the walk to his home had been. He wanted to speak, to just get lost in the easy friendship they were beginning to formulate, but was unsure of what to say.

The chilly silence wasn't broken until they were on campus, approaching the large glass doors that made up the main entrance.

"Am I actually allowed on campus?" Axel inquired, eyeing the building nervously.

"Course you are, doofus," said Roxas, rolling his eyes, "Just don't do anything stupid of crazy enough to get us kicked out."

"Yes, sir," said Axel, saluting him, "So how does this thingy work? Does the room have to be like, completely black?"

"Uhh," Roxas started, trying to think of a way to explain it that Axel would understand, "If it's not done in darkness, the light will ruin it. There is a kind of red light that you can use, that's for doing them in black and white."

Axel nodded. "Okay, I get it. How do you see then?"

"You don't," said Roxas shortly, tapping lightly on a heavy looking door. "You have to knock, to make sure you walk in on someone and ruin their pictures," he explained.

"Makes sense," said Axel.

When no reply came from the dark room, Roxas cracked open the door to reveal a room fully lit with florescent lights. Upon seeing this, he swung the door all the way open and motioned for Axel to follow him. "You can come in, just don't touch anything, 'cause this shit's expensive," he warned.

"I've never seen photos developed before," said Axel thoughtfully, "I guess technically I won't get to see it today, either," he used hand motions for quotation marks when he said 'see.'

"I'm going to use the amber light today, so we _can _see," said Roxas boredly, setting his things down atop the smooth granite counter.

"Okay, I guess I'll just go stand in the corner and watch."

"Sounds good."

Roxas shut the door, which sealed with a seemingly abnormally loud smacking sound as the rubber stopper slid over the linoleum. He turned a few switches in the corner where Axel stood, and the bright florescent lights flickered out, and slowly, the dim red light became visible.

"Hey, look, your face is the color of my hair," Axel teased, comparing a handful of his shoulder-length hair to his own bare flesh.

"Says the man who claims to not be ginger," Roxas muttered, taking the first strip of film and setting it in the enlarger.

"What's that for?" Axel asked, standing on his tiptoes as if that would get him a better view.

"It's to blow up the picture," Roxas explained, "Otherwise the photo would be about the size of a memory card, or a saltine cracker.

"Can't have that," said Axel amusedly, "it looks like a microscope.

At this point Roxas was paying more attention to the focus lens than to Axel, so he chose only to disinterestedly mutter, "Yeah," before returning to his work. Despite having not really planned on doing that with his day, Roxas was really enjoying himself. Most people considered this the most boring part of photographic arts, but him it was the best. It was like magic, to carefully submerge a blank sheet of paper into a developer and watching a picture slowly come into view. It was like watching a portrait paint itself.

It truly was art. Some people liked to say that there was no talent required here, that anyone could take a picture, that it wasn't _really _art. Roxas knew that wasn't true. Sure, any person could point a camera and push a button, but it took someone with a true eye to really _see _the beauty. No matter how many classes you took, if you didn't have that eye, you never would.

"Pretty," said a quiet voice behind him. Roxas froze. He'd been so lost in his work that he hadn't even noticed when Axel came right up behind him to watch. He squeaked and dropped the photo he was working on at the moment into the fixer a little more quickly than he originally would have.

"_Jeez, warn a guy before you sneak up like that!" _Roxas whispered back, irritated.

"What does that do?" Axel asked, ignoring Roxas outburst. He pointed a long, slender finger towards the solution which now held the photo.

Roxas took a minute, choosing his words carefully, before saying, "It's to kind of… protect the picture," he explained quietly, "It's to seal the ink in place, to protect it from smudging and easy wear."

Axel nodded once. He was so close that a few strands of his mane brushed up against Roxas' cheek, as he was hunched over the blonde's shoulder to better see what was going on. He was much, much too close for Roxas' liking…

"I don't know much about this kind of stuff," said Axel, "but I know that you have a gift."

Roxas was flattered. After all, it was just a lousy picture of a rose.

"Hey Axel?"

"Hmm?"

"Why are we whispering?"

"I don't know," said Axel, his voice now at full volume, "I just felt like I kinda had to, ya know? Seemed right, 'cause it's all ambient in here."

Roxas took the chemical soaked photograph to a clothesline, similar to the one he had at home, and pinned it up. "Ambient?"

"Yeah. Like, it's all dim and quiet in here, and you looked about a million miles away from Earth when you were doing… whatever it is that you're doing, I wasn't kidding when I said I really don't get it at all," said Axel lightly.

"Here, I'll show you," said Roxas.

With Axel standing behind him, Roxas slowly took him through each step, explaining each process in detail, talking about the specific timings, explaining the concept of exposure, all with precision. Half the time he didn't even hear the words coming out of his mouth, and barely paying attention to what he was doing with his hands. He worked on autopilot, constantly aware only of Axel, standing only centimeters away from him, the heat all but radiating off of his skin. He was like _right there._

Soon the entire clothesline was full, and Axel hadn't moved an inch. Most of the photos Roxas had taken on his own time, but as they were reaching the end of the roll, it came time to view the pictures from the burn site.

Roxas giggled when he saw the "candid" he took of Axel. Now that he could really take the time to look, he realized that the redhead (though that could not be seen in black and white) was truly a beautiful human being. Once he got past the hair and tattoos he was so fond of complaining about, he found that Axel really wasn't that strange-looking at all. His flawless skin showed off high cheekbones and a perfectly angled jaw. It wasn't hard now, to see why he was a model. Not that that particular picture was very flattering; he was covered in soot and his mouth was open in a very confused expression. Roxas continued, remembering that he too had his picture taken by surprise.

There was something mysteriously beautiful in seeing such a lovely, old building burning to the ground, decorated with bright, furious all-consuming flames and billowing black smoke. For someone who had claimed to have no experience whatsoever in photographic arts, Axel could take a pretty damn good picture.

"This is good," said Roxas, waving the still-wet photograph for Axel to see, "I mean _really _good. Can I put this in my showcase? For when we have viewings? You'll be credited for it, I'll have your name with it and everything."

"You really want it?" Axel asked, the surprise ringing clear in his deep voice.

"Yeah. It's like, perfect," Roxas assured him.

Axel nodded his head, "Sure, you can have it. You don't have to credit me for it though, all I did was push the big button, like you told me to."

"I think you have more talent than you give yourself credit for," said Roxas, absentmindedly moving on to the last one, the one he'd originally not intended to do. Though, thinking about it, Axel would probably never let him get away with skipping it anyway.

"Can I do that one?" Axel asked suddenly.

"Excuse me?" Roxas asked, confused.

"I wanna do the last one," Axel clarified, pointing to the glossy paper that Roxas held in his hands.

"Oh… yeah sure, I guess," said Roxas, unable to come up with a good reason to not let him try one. And goddammit, he was _still _way too close! He handed it over. "You figured out how?"

"Yeah, I got it memorized."

He watched quietly as Axel performed each action perfectly, though admittedly the exposure could've been a little bit better. Axel smiled as the picture came into view, and it didn't go unnoticed. It was, as Roxas knew it would be, of himself, with a look that seemed to linger between amusement and confusion glued onto his round, boyish face.

Axel's smile changed from an amused one to a proud one as he moved the photo from the stop bath to the fixer.

"I'll definitely be keeping that one," he said, pride hinting at his voice.

"What! Nu-uh!" Roxas exclaimed, "Are you kidding me? I look like an idiot!"

"You have dozens of pictures of me," Axel reminded him.

"Yeah, for _work._"

"Work or not, that's still my face you're flashin' around in that little portfolio of yours," Axel replied sassily, hands on his surprisingly feminine hips (not that Roxas had been looking), "besides, it's mine. I took it, and I developed it, all by myself."

Roxas snorted, "What do you even want with it?"

The question seemed to momentarily stunt Axel; perhaps the redhead himself didn't actually know the answer.

"I don't know," he admitted, "the memory I guess. It's gonna go up on my corkboard with all my old family pictures and stuff."

That didn't seem so bad to Roxas. Axel had made a decent point anyway.

"Fine," he said slowly, "I can live with that. Just as long as I don't see my silly, soot-covered face anywhere _but _your corkboard, understand? I _really _don't belong in pictures—"

Suddenly he was met with something very soft and warm against his lips. He wanted to speak, but his mother had always told him not to talk with his mouth full, and it was full, he realized, with _Axel's mouth!_ Which was, this time completely intentionally, pressed up against his own.

Well. What to do here. His first reaction was to freeze, stiff as a board (no pun intended). A million thoughts flashed through his head at random, some concerning Naminé, some memories of Hayner, some that were completely unrelated to his love life (or lack thereof), and _some _concerning tackling Axel to the floor and sucking the life out of the admittedly very nice mouth he was being presented with.

Before he could choose the latter, as he suspected he might have, Axel was off him, his entire temperature-raising presence gone. Looking wildly around, he found the man tucking the picture of Roxas safely in his pocket whilst heading for the door.

"Sure thing Blondie. Cross my heart," was all he said before swinging the heavy door open and walking out, leaving Roxas leaning dazedly up against the wall (how had he even gotten there in the first place?)to contemplate the situation.

"Umm, _what just happened!" _he frustratedly called to no one. He felt a headache coming on already at the thought of all the impending questions that were sure to arise, the first and foremost being _why?_

_Why _did Axel kiss him in the first place? _Did _he even kiss him? It all happened so fast, Roxas wasn't even sure if it was real, and not some crazy fantasy that his bored, sexually frustrated brain made up. And _why, _even if it didn't actually happen, did Roxas consider responding? Not only did he consider, he almost _did. _He scrunched his eyes shut tightly and tried to banish the idea from his mind.

The next question that began to wander its way into his mind was _what? _

What would this mean for him and Naminé? They'd been together for years, and as pitiful as it sounded, he'd just gone farther with Axel than he ever had with her. Would he even tell her? A solid pang of guilt spread painfully through his chest, he knew that chances were he probably wouldn't man up and say anything at all.

Also, what did this mean for Axel and him? Axel knew fully well that he was in a relationship. Then again, he also knew of Roxas' discontentment with said relationship. Some part of him realized that he should be angry about this, as Axel had no right to go around kissing him, _especially _since he knew pretty much everything. But at the moment, Roxas was more concerned with what this meant for _them. _Would they remain friends after this? Even though technically they'd only been friends for a few hours, he didn't really want to lose the easy relationship he'd gradually formed with the redhead. Roxas wasn't a slut, nor was he a cheater, so there was little to no chance of him partaking in any kind of affair, and despite the growing feelings he seemed to be having for Axel, he would never just abandon Naminé like that.

A break up, after all, would surely mean a change of living space for Nam, and she just couldn't make it on her own, Roxas knew. Though he was starting to consider that maybe he wasn't in love with her anymore, he still cared deeply about her as a person, and it's not like he was expected to act particularly romantic towards her. They were pretty much friends with pet names, kisses on the cheek, and a shared bed. It's not like they actually _did _anything in that bed.

But that still didn't give him the right to become involved with Axel, as he suspected the redhead might be attempting.

He was starting to grow irritated with Axel now. Not for the act of kissing him in the first place, but for not sticking around to explain himself… he didn't even have a phone number to work off of!

Roxas clenched his fist, and in doing so, realized that there was a small piece of photo paper crumpled between his fingers. He had no idea how it got there, but unfolded it to see if it said anything nonetheless.

_210-562-8898… memorize it._

Roxas snorted. Handwriting that girly could only belong to Axel. He shoved the slip into his pocket, wondering idly where Axel had gotten the pen from and making a mental note to slap him for ripping up a piece of precious photo paper.

He assumed that Axel most likely slipped the paper in his hand when they were kissing, seeing as he would've been much too distracted at the moment to notice.

Being confrontational like he was, Roxas decided that when he had the opportune moment later, he would call, just to try to figure out what the hell was going on, and to bring a bit of resolve to the situation. There was nothing that bothered him more than loose ends. They itched and scratched at the back of his mind like bug bites, for a while he could forget about them, but then touch it once, and it's all your mind can think about.

He touched one finger to his lips, as if looking for evidence that another pair of lips had actually been there, shaking his head at himself in disbelief.

Deciding that there were no further conclusions he could draw until he spoke with Axel, he quickly began to gather up all of his equipment as he prepared to wrap up and go home.

* * *

><p>Axel was running. Running loudly, breathing hard, feet smacking the moist ground, the icy autumn wind whipping through his hair and stinging his face. He didn't know where he was headed, he just knew he had to get his girly ass out of there before Roxas <em>killed <em>him.

Soon he became conscious of a dull aching at the base of his throat, the kind he always got when running in the cold, forcing him to slow his pace a bit. He figured he was at a far enough distance from the school here Roxas probably wouldn't be able to follow him, so he sighed and looked around for some clues as to where he was.

Nothing looked familiar to him, so, trying to not look like some lost tourist in his own city, he sat down on a nearby bench to think a moment. He could continue to aimlessly wander around until something looked familiar, ask someone else for directions, or call Demyx. Scratch that, he couldn't call Demyx, he didn't have his phone on him. None of the above seemed like a very good idea to him anyway, and he sure as hell wasn't about to go find Roxas and ask him for help, he had too much pride to ask someone for directions after running away from them.

Suddenly a taxi pulled right up to the curb in front of him, and he realized that he'd been sitting at a taxi stand.

Thanking his lucky stars for sending this beloved means of transportation, he got up and climbed into the backseat. Once inside the warm vehicle, he wrinkled his nose in disgust. The cab smelled like any other; like sweat and puke and old French fries.

"Corner of North 5th and Market, please," said Axel to the driver, who nodded in his rear view mirror and started toward Axel's destination. Axel looked outside, trying to memorize the area. After crossing Main Street, he realized that he must have been on the south side of Hollow Bastion. _Well, that explains how I got lost, _Axel thought to himself. He'd grown up and lived exclusively on the North side, and aside from rare occasion, he'd hardly ever had a reason to venture South of Main Street.

After about twenty minutes and a hell of a lot of traffic lights, the cab finally pulled up to a familiar curb. He paid the fare quickly, in order to faster escape the smelly vehicle. He felt slightly sick to his stomach now.

He hoped that Demyx wasn't home yet, because one: he knew that if his boyfriend had arrived any length of time before Axel, he'd become worried, as Axel usually didn't leave the apartment at all, besides work, and when he did, he always left a note. Today he hadn't left a note when he left in the morning; after all he'd left with the intention of getting a book, a board, and then coming home. He certainly didn't anticipate being out past—he checked his watch—four o'clock.

He also didn't much want to confront Demyx at all, anyway, because he needed time to slap himself for doing what he just did. Demyx would surely notice how upset he was about it if he didn't give himself time to compose himself. He'd never described an _actual _situation such as this to his boyfriend before, it was always just some story he'd made up, with the exception of Larxene. But that didn't really count since it was more like Demyx explained the story to him, not the other way around.

Taking a deep breath, he tried the door, and it swung open easily for him. Damn.

Before he could even shut the broken door properly, a bullet zoomed into his chest. A giant one, with a sandy mullet and a vice-like grip.

"Axel! Where the _hell_ have you been! You've been gone for hours! You didn't leave a note or anything! And you left your phone here, so I couldn't even call you. What gives?"

Gently, he pushed his hysterical boyfriend off of him, so that he could face him properly.

"Demyx, calm down. How long have you been home?" Axel asked.

Demyx crossed his arms, "Since noon. I got off early today. I came home, figuring we could spend some time together, since you were off today too, but.. yeah, obviously you weren't here, and after a few hours I started to get worried."

Axel leaned forward and touched his forehead affectionately to Demyx's, in an attempt to calm him down a little.

"I'm sorry," he said honestly, "I didn't think I'd be out for so long. I was just gonna go to the bookstore for a little bit, the one at the mall. But then I kinda ran into Roxas and his friends and we kinda just lost track of time."

Demyx's expression softened immediately. "Oh. Okay, I understand. Sorry for like, blowing up at you. You know how I get," he grinned sheepishly, "So what did you guys do for four plus hours?"

Axel walked over to the couch as casually as possible and sat down. "Not much," he said, trying to keep his voice even, "We got ice cream, hung around the mall for a little bit, then we went over to the college and Roxas taught me how to develop pictures."

The sandy-haired man nodded and took a seat next to Axel. "So whatcha thinking? You guys gonna go out again?"

This was a perfectly normal, casual conversation for the couple, but Axel was beginning to get very nervous. Because somewhere deep in his mind, he knew that, should he continue, Roxas wouldn't _be _just another fuck. How was he supposed to explain that to Demyx? You're not _supposed _to get attached to friends with benefits!

He cleared his throat, "Umm, maybe. I'm gonna go get a shower, okay?"

Demyx looked a little confused at the sudden halt in conversation, but he nodded anyway, "Okay, I'll start dinner. Or did you want me to get takeout?"

He attempted a smile. "Doesn't matter to me, babe," he replied lightly, "Just don't burn the place down."

Trying not to look too shifty, like he was going too fast, he made his way to the bathroom, shut the door, and locked it. He wondered if Demyx thought he was behaving strangely or not. It's not like he _thought _about what he was doing when he had nothing to hide, how was he to know if he was acting casual. He began to contemplate if this was how criminals felt when trying not to give themselves away. What's a wrong move? Or more importantly, what was a right one? This is why sneaking around was never Axel's strong spot. He liked things in the open for everyone to see.

He waiting until the steamy water was flowing freely before banging his head against the wall and cursing himself.

"_Why the __**hell**__ did you do that, you dumb fuck!" _he hissed to himself, "_he's probably freaking the fuck out right now! YOU are freaking out!" _ he, of course, referring to his temperamental blonde. No, not his. Shoo, traitorous thoughts! He growled and buried his head in his hands, as thought that little inch of flesh, muscle and bone would provide a sanctuary between himself and the world. But all that did was confine him more to his extremely frustrated self. Not only had he just ruined any chances of friendship he had with Roxas, but also made a complete and total ass out of himself in doing so. He _knew _that Roxas had a girlfriend. _He _had a _boyfriend! _Not that Roxas knew that but still!

He didn't _mean _to kiss him… it just happened. One minute he was admiring the photo he'd developed himself, next he was attacking the adorable little—no, Roxas—he was attacking _Roxas _with his lips! He didn't know what possessed him to do it, he just knew that Roxas had been standing there, hands on his hips, giving Axel that glare he was so fond of, and his self-control apparently couldn't hold out any longer.

And the phone number thing, what was _that _about? He wrote it down while Roxas was absorbed in his work, with intentions of giving it to him when they departed. In a way, he did, but obviously he wasn't expecting them to part _that _way.

Axel hastily shed his clothes and climbed into the shower. He felt _dirty. _Not only mentally, but physically as well. His mouth was dry and his palms were sweaty, plus he was covered head to toe with a thin sheen of cold sweat from running outside. Not to mention that thinking about Roxas had given him a raging hard-on. _No no __**no**__! I refuse to stoop to that level! _His body seemed to say otherwise.

He turned the shower to cold and tried to ignore it; no _way _was he going to 'take care of it' while the blonde was still on his mind. If all else failed maybe Demyx could help him out later. He squinted his eyes shut and shifted his focus back to the issue at hand. He didn't know what to do. Eventually he'd _have _to see Roxas again, he had to work sometime didn't he? What if he called? Axel wasn't sure he would, but he wasn't going to be a pussy about it, he knew that for sure. He'd just man up, apologize for his idiocy…

And hope Roxas wouldn't tear his face off.

Axel knew that some part of him _liked _Roxas' moody disposition. It's gotta be that glare. He didn't know anyone else who could look so angry yet so goddamn irresistible at the same time. _I must be a masochist, _he thought to himself, _or an idiot. One of the two. Or both! Yeah, probably both._

He despised uncertainty. It was one of his pet peeves. He was impatient, and impulsive and he knew it. In fact he was beginning to wish he stopped to ask for Roxas' number before hauling ass in the opposite direction. Though that would probably have just earned him a slap in the face. Still, the anticipation was killing him, it bit hard with gnashing teeth, right where it hurt.

He cupped his hands together and tried to blow into them, hoping the sounds may bring him some comfort, but he couldn't, since they were so wet. So he slumped against the smooth cool tile of the shower wall and covered his face once again with his large hands. Eventually he slid all the way down the wall and sat in the tub like a child, in a position of defeat, letting the chilled water travel in streams down his body, leaving a trail of goose pimples wherever they went.

He'd let himself become attached to Roxas, and he knew it.

Trying to keep calm despite this new revelation, he cleared the water off of his face (only for it to slowly drizzle back down again) and started contemplating what to do next. He knew what his _should _do: either come clean to both of them or forget about Roxas and move on. It couldn't possibly be _that _hard, they barely knew each other!

Well, the first option seemed immediately out of the question anyway… he knew he'd never be brave enough. Chances were they both get angry, and Demyx would just leave him. He briefly entertained the idea of simply going on with whatever was 'going on' without telling Demyx at all, but shot down the idea immediately. That would be like doing exactly what he feared his boyfriend would do to _him._

Simply kicking Roxas out of the equation seemed like the best thing to do. In theory. Why did that make Axel so sad? Oh… right.

He shut the water off and began to dry himself, attempting to clear his mind of all emotion on the subject; this should _not _be a big deal. Hopefully Demyx just wouldn't notice how flushed his cheeks were.

He exited the bathroom to find Demyx twirling around the kitchen, happy a can be, and singing into a ladle.

"_Simplllllllle and clleeeeeeean is the waaaaaaaaay that you're maaakiiiin me feeeeeeeel, tonii—_oh! Hey babe," said Demyx, halting hi ballad immediately and spinning right into Axel's arms and pecking him sweetly on the lips.

"Fancy meeting you here," said Axel, grinning a bit, because he couldn't help but be a little bit happy when his ever so cheerful boyfriend acted like this. "What's for dinner?"

"Frozen shrimp scaaaaaampi," Demyx sang. He skipped back to the stove and stirred it with the ladle he'd been previously using as a microphone. Axel wrinkled his nose.

"Frozen, you say?" he joked, making a noise of disgust. Demyx turned around, rolling his eyes, and disinterestedly smacked him on the arm.

"You know what I mean. I miss _real _seafood," he lamented, looking at his feet.

Demyx, having been born and raised in Atlantica, his parents being marine biologists, practically lived off seafood when he was growing up. Hollow Bastion, being as industrious as it was, had few sources of water. The only fish available here were the packaged and shipped kind. Technically it all came from Atlantica anyway, but being packed away replaced that fresh taste with a "I've been in a box for weeks" taste.

Axel absently started playing with a few strands of Demyx's hair. "I thought you moved to get away from the fish, Dem."

He leaned back into Axel's touch. "Don't know what you got until it's gone I guess," he sighed.

"Yeah... guess not."

Suddenly a shrill ringing sound pierced the air. It took Axel a minute to identify the sound as his own ringtone; his phone went off so little he'd forgotten what it sounded like. His heart dropped to the pit of his stomach as it occurred to him who would probably be calling.

"Be right back," he said stiffly. He detached himself from Demyx and snatched his phone off the counter. The number that appeared on the screen was unfamiliar. He took a deep breath, flipped the cell phone open and held the receiver to his ear.

"Hello?" he greeted the mysterious caller steadily.

"_Axel."_ Shit, he sounded pissed.

"That's my name," he said, trying to make his voice sound as light and teasing as possible, ignoring the queasy feeling building up in his chest.

"_We need to talk,"_ said Roxas, unamused.

_Keep it together, Axel, keep it together. _"That's generally why you call someone." He took the opportunity to exit the kitchen/living room into his (their) bedroom.

"_Ha-Ha."_

"Look, Rox, I'm sorry about earlier. That was really dumb, and I feel like a jackass—"

"_Why'd you leave?"_

Axel wasn't quite sure why Roxas had chosen to ask that of all things, instead of just 'why'd you do it?' but he'd take it. He didn't allow the wistful idea brimming under the surface of his mind that Roxas hadn't wanted him to leave, he didn't let it cross his mind just yet. But it was there, sticking out menacingly, like a shark fin sprouting from the sea, promising something much more dangerous for anyone who wanted to tread those waters. _Focus, Axel._

"I was scared of you punching the living daylights out of me, to be honest," he admitted. He could hear Roxas chuckling through the receiver. Chuckling was a good sign, wasn't it?

"_I… thought about it," _he replied slowly, _"But I wasn't going to. I just wished you'd have stuck around to explain yourself. You left me a bit confused."_

Axel breathed a sigh of relief he hoped the attractive blonde wouldn't hear. At least he wasn't angry. "Yeah, that was a bit of an… off moment for me, to say the least. I honestly couldn't tell you what the fuck I was thinking—"

"_It's fine," _Roxas interjected quickly, "_I don't care. Just… don't pull another stunt like that again, yeah? Or like, at least _warn _me next time," _he chuckled airly.

There was that though again, rising, rising, skimming the surface now. Axel fought to not look too deeply into that statement; Roxas was making this much too difficult for him. _Ignore the 'next time' bit, Axel. We're trying to __**not **__have a repeat of this, remember? Oh look, now you're talking to yourself. Get a fucking grip! _He faked a nervous chuckle.

"Yeah… uh, okay."

"_I gotta go, Axe," _said Roxas, "_the gang's here."_

"Take it easy," said Axel neutrally.

"_Bye." _Click.

Axel set the phone down next to him on the blue comforter he was sitting on. The phone conversation had left him hopelessly confused. Roxas didn't seem to be mad at him _at all. _In fact, disregarding the moody introduction, he sounded almost cheerful. He'd called him _Axe. _He shook his fiery mane. It didn't matter, because he and Roxas couldn't remain friend after this. It was a risk Axel simply wasn't willing to take. He'd pick that beautiful soul, singing his heart out in the kitchen, over Roxas any day. Right?

Since he was still confined within the private comforts of his bedroom, Axel took the opportunity to slip on a pair of comfortable sweats and a clean gray t-shirt before putting his phone on the charger on his nightstand and heading back into the kitchen.

"Who was that?" Demyx asked serenely. He turned around briefly when Axel entered the room, but was now facing the stove once again, still swinging his hips and humming to himself, making even the spices on the counter dance. Bless his little heart.

"Uhh Roxas. I… accidently left with one of his pictures and he wants it back," said Axel, lying on his toes, "it was the one I developed. Wanna see?"

"Sure!" said Demyx cheerfully, completely oblivious to Axel's shifty tone and wary movements. "Wait, how does he have your number?" he asked curiously.

"Hmm, I don't know, now that you mention it," said Axel from the bathroom, trying to make his voice sound intrigued. He fished around in his jean pockets on the floor until he found both glossy sheets of photo paper; the small strip from the photo booth, and the slightly larger one of Roxas. "Maybe Leon gave it to him when he assigned it to me, y'know? In case he had any questions." That sounded like a legitimate reason. He tucked the strip from the mall back into his jean pocket as he re-entered the room once again.

Demyx took the thirty seconds Axel had given him to switch from humming to whistling, and was now spooning their finished pasta onto paper plates.

"Bon appetite," Demyx sang, skipping over to the couch, where they generally ate their dinners.

"There ya go," said Axel, trading the plate of food for the photograph of Roxas. "I took it, and developed it, all by myself," he said, pride hinting in his voice. After all, he'd never done anything like that before. It made him feel pretty accomplished.

"Awe!" Demyx squealed, "he's so cute! When did you take this? He kinda looks… well for lack of a better word, hun, he kinda looks dirty."

"Oh, that was yesterday, after the fire. That's just soot he's covered in," Axel reassured him, "you can't see it here, but this giant chunk of wood got him on the shoulder pretty bad. I pretty much had to pick him up and carry him out of there."

Demyx giggled. "Axel the hero," he teased. "He has very pretty eyes, I can see why you like him."

Axel allowed a nervous chuckle; hopefully Demyx hadn't picked up on just how much he fancied the blonde. Who knows what a disaster reaction that would cause. Did Demyx actually know how to shout? Axel didn't care to find out.

"Yeah, you should see it when he pouts, it's the most adorable thing," said Axel fondly.

Apparently Demyx had had enough of the conversation, because he picked up the remote to their little television and turned it on, snuggling up against Axel like he would to a favorite teddy bear. It was a little awkward, because they were both still eating dinner, but Axel enjoyed the closeness nonetheless. He liked to touch and be touched.

Even though it was still early on in the evening, Axel was exhausted. He'd tired himself out running, not to mention he was tired emotionally from all the bloody thinking he was doing. A certain blonde seemed hellbent on not giving him a break. Crying, he knew (not that Axel had done any of that) was just about the most tiring thing a person could do. So the same rules applied to emotional stress, right? Who even cared.

"You look kinda tense, babe," Demyx remarked, playing with a strand of his hair, which looked less red and more maroon in the dim light, "Are you okay?"

The words were supposed to be calming, reassuring, but to Axel they cut like daggers, each word felt like another blow to the gut. He was _betraying _his boyfriend, and he didn't even have the balls to admit it. And the beautiful little person was asking him is he was okay. The guilt was making him sick to his stomach.

"I feel kind of lightheaded," he said tiredly. He leaned as far back into the squishy cushions as he could, taking deep breaths and staring up at the ceiling.

"I'll get you a glass of water," said Demyx at once, immediately jumping to his feet. He took Axel's barely-touched dinner with him, on the assumption that it wasn't going to be finished anyway. While he was over there, he scooped all the leftovers from the frying pan into a plastic container to be stored in the refrigerator, and washed his hands again for good measure. By the time he returned with Axel's promised glass of ice cold water and some Tylenol, the redhead was out cold.

He looked so peaceful in his sleep, the lines of stress and worry that had slowly but surely begun to form on his young face smoothed out as he snored quietly. Not wanting to disturb the rest he so obviously needed, Demyx took the blue afghan that lay previously untouched in the corner and draped it over Axel's sleeping form, placing a light kiss on each of his teardrop tattoos.

"Sweet dreams, Axie," he whispered.

**Could I be so mean as to ask for a Christmas/New Years gift? I don't want much, I'm not material, it doesn't cost a thing. Just please oh please, taking thirty seconds to give me a little review? You don't even have to say nice things, just any kind of advice you could give me to make this story better. **


	5. Corsets, Stilettos, and Lace, Oh My!

**Hi hi hi! This chapter's a bit of a shortie in terms of _Perfectionist,_ as a general rule I try to make them at least ten thousand words.. But oh well! Got some really cool stuff in this one for ya ;) **

**In other news, HOLY SHAT I GOT LIKE EIGHT REVIEWS FOR CHAPTER FOUR! You all have no idea how much I love love love reviews. They're like my favorite thing on the internet. Keep it up, you beautiful people! The more I get, the faster I write and the faster I get this shit uploaded for you**

**So it JUST occured to me that I've gone FIVE WHOLE CHAPTERS and 50,000 some odd words with NO DISCLAIMER! I am SO gonna get sued -.-' do you think they'll let me off the hook if I do one now? *Clears throat* Attention, attention! I WAS trying to sneak some of the characters into my house, but unfortunately, I was caught and had to give them back. That being said, I obviously don't own any of the Characters or the Kingdom Hearts franchise... just a whole lot of merchandise. **

As Demyx's voice was the last thing he heard before heavy sleep took him in it's comforting arms, it was also the first thing he heard upon waking up.

At first he thought it was just his dream, but the increasing volume forced him to slowly become aware, until he was swimming on the brink of consciousness, not quite breaking the calm surface until he felt cool fingers gently tracing shapes atop his forehead. He winced away from the cold and opened his eyes.

"Axel? Leon's on the phone. Should I tell him you're sick?"

"Hmm?" Demyx had finally broken through the delicate bubble of sleep that Axel had been floating around in. Before waiting for Demyx to repeat himself, the question suddenly registered in his mind and he gave a quick response. "No, no, s'okay," he mumbled, attempting to sit up, "Lemme talk to 'im."

"Are you sure?" Demyx replied, still concerned for Axel's health.

"I'm fine, Dem," Axel reassured him, albeit very groggily. "Just needed some sleep is all. Now I really gotta get up and move around, this couch kills."

"Okayyy… here," said Demyx, handing over Axel's own cell phone.

Axel placed it mechanically up against his ear.

"Axel," he stated his name blandly.

"I found a place to do a shoot today, Axel," said a voice that obviously belonged to Leon, as it didn't bother making any small talk at all, "our crew for the day is assembling in the parking lot of… the burn site. Be there in an hour." Jeez, he made it sound like they were going on some kind of spy mission with the utter seriousness of his tone.

Axel tiredly rubbed his eyes, clearing the crusty sleep out of them. "Sure, whatever."

Without even the courtesy of a reply, Leon hung up. In a way, Axel was grateful that he kept his conversations so short. It was rude, but at least he kept to the point."

"What'd he say?" Demyx asked, who had not moved from his spot on the couch next to Axel.

"He says he found work for me," he said on a yawn, stretching like a cat, "Guess I'm meetin' him and the crew at the mansion in an hour… Oh, fuck! I forgot to get a skateboard yesterday! I gotta run!"

He sprang off the couch at an alarming rate and booked it to his bedroom at a super human speed to change into a fresh set of clothes. While rummaging through the clothes piled at the bottom of his closet, he mentally calculated a journey on foot to take about forty-five minutes to get to Poir, the building (or what was left of it) was twenty or so blocks away from his home.

"I made you coffee!" Demyx called from the kitchen, "Want me to put it in a Styrofoam cup for you?"

"Yeah, thanks!" Axel called back, pulling a hoodie over his head. He quickly checked himself in the mirror to make sure he didn't forget anything important, like an undershirt or pants. When he deemed himself decent he ran, and stumbled, back into the kitchen, as a result of hopping on one foot and trying to pull a sock over the other.

"Axel! Calm down, it's gonna be fine!" Demyx cried, grabbing Axel by both of his shoulders and shaking him. "Are you calm now?"

"Yes, I'm calm," Axel huffed, for the sake of being let go of so he could get to work faster.

"Okay, now here's your coffee," he handed him a cup, warm on the outside despite the insulation, "And here's your kiss," he stood up on his tiptoes to place a gentle kiss on Axel's lips.

"Have a good day," Axel said, looking at his boyfriend directly in the eyes before turning on his heel and heading out the door.

The walk, or rather, run to work was not pleasant, like the other week. He didn't have time to listen to the birds sing or watch his bluish shadow move or run into any Roxases. Thankfully, he didn't have a second to spare thinking about him either. He really wasn't up for dealing with it at the moment, or at all for that matter. When he finally arrived at the telltale wrought iron gate, he paused to check his phone only to find out he was ten minutes early. Great, now he would freeze his bum off in the cold with that ache in his throat again and wait, and meanwhile his thoughts would probably unwillingly jump right back to Roxas… maybe he'd overreacted a little bit.

He sat, out of breath, right on the marble front stoop, which was slightly charred around the edges but otherwise okay. It was the only bit of building left that wasn't burnt to a crisp; of the manor that once stood, mighty and glourious, and icon to their world, and several others, as the fashion center. Not that Axel particularly cared about any of that, he was more concerned about where he would get his next paycheck in the mail. He didn't know how to do anything else. Hopefully Leon would be able to establish new headquarters, and soon, or he'd be out of work.

"Oh sure, he shows up early after the whole place burns down."

Axel jumped and snapped his head around to look behind him; Leon had emerged from inside the mansion.

"What were you doing in there?" he asked curiously. Technically it was the company's property, but he thought it a logical question to ask anyway, who goes to scope out the inside of a ruined building, besides dumb high school kids?

"Checking around to see if there was anything we could save. Tens of thousands of dollars' worth of equipment, destroyed," Leon replied gravely.

Axel couldn't help but feel bad for him a little bit. His entire business was just turned to ash. Literally.

"How are you holding up?" he asked, feeling obligated. Leon didn't look at him, he looked instead out into the abundant woods they were surrounded completely by.

"Nobody was hurt. That's the important thing. Supplies can be replaced, and all of those advertising companies? They need us just as much as we need them. The mansion, it was like a home for us. But Poir can survive without it." That was the most Leon had spoken to him since Reno went to Midgar; since they'd broken up.

"Yeah, I guess so," said Axel, "Did they figure out how the fire got started yet?"

Leon stiffened noticeably. "No. They still haven't found the source."

"I see," said Axel, though he narrowed his eyes a bit. He was almost certain that Leon was lying to him, but chose not to press the matter any. After all, it wasn't really his place to ask, anyway.

The chilled silence was broken by the roar of an engine as a shocking-pink convertible that looked like it was straight out of the Barbie aisle from Toys R' Us pulled into the driveway. Within seconds of parking it Marluxia stepped out, looking fresh as a daisy, followed by the slate-haired man from the other day, Zexion, and another photographer whose name Axel thought was Lexaeus. Last to emerge was—fucking Christ—Roxas.

"Hey Squally!" said Marluxia brightly, "Caught up to the rest of the gang on the way in, so I picked 'em all up at once. You ready to take off, or are we waiting up for someone else?"

Leon shook his head. "That's Leon," he corrected, "Anyway, no, this is everyone. Private shoot today, we're going to the falls."

Everyone's jaws, including Roxas', dropped at the statement.

"Y-you're kidding!" Marluxia exclaimed, stuttering for the first time Axel could remember. "You mean THE falls! You actually got permission!"

"Nope," said Leon, flashing a rare smirk, "We got requested."

Marluxia actually whooped and jumped up and down enthusiastically. "All right! We're gonna have to take the van though, my baby's not big enough for all of us."

Leon nodded curtly and they all headed to the back, where Axel knew Leon always parked his silver Chrysler. He waited up for Roxas, who was slowly trailing behind everyone, looking unsure of what to do or where they were all headed to.

"He parks in the back," Axel explained, catching the boy's cerulean eyes and motioning for him to join him. Roxas quickened his pace until he and Axel were walking side by side.

"So, when he said the falls, did he really mean—?"

"He must have." Roxas' mouth fell into a perfect 'O.'

"Holy shit," he breathed, "I've heard stories, but I never imagined I'd ever actually see them…"

They were heading to the only actual body of water remotely close to the city; the widely known, legendary Rising Falls of Hollow Bastion.

"I've seen them, once," said Axel. The falls, as mysterious and marvelous as they were, were shut off to the public for multiple reasons. As it was the city's only source of water, it was used as a reservoir, and therefore had to be kept clean, and most things stayed cleaner when people didn't piss in them. Part of them had been open for tourists, once, but had been shut down years and years ago; the jagged cliffs and that which made up the mountains were a dangerous threat, the area was treacherous.

"What was it like?" Roxas asked, his voice strung with awe.

"It was… incredible, Axel answered honestly, "You'll see for yourself soon enough, it's not that far North from here."

They rounded the corner to see all of their colleagues piling into a large silver-white van with tinted windows.

"I'll take the back," Zexion offered. It was quite possible that he feared an argument over seating arrangement, seeing as Marluxia was apparently arguing with Lexaeus over who would take shotgun. Axel rolled his eyes.

"Okay, if you want," he said neutrally, shrugging. Really, what did seating matter to him?

Zexion just nodded a confirmation and strode confidently over to Lexaeus. Axel had to admit the young man had balls; he would never try to contradict him. The man towered over Axel's six-foot-five and had the build of a football player. But Zexion seemed right at home grabbing a bulky shoulder and forcing him to look him in the eyes.

"Lexy," he said gently, "Let's give Marly the front seat this time, okay? You can sit in the front seat when he drives us home. Right?" he aimed the last word directly toward Marluxia, whose mouth hung open in utter shock at Zexion's ability to instantly calm the large man down.

"Uh, right," he said nervously.

Lexaeus seemed to contemplate this for a moment, then nodded with a sharp jerk of the head and headed in the direction Zexion was pointing him, towards the back end of the van.

Axel, who had been watching the scene whilst leaning up against the open door, cocked an eyebrow at the unfolding scene. What was the story with those two?

"He's my big brother," Zexion whispered as he passed by, Lexaeus had already climbed into the backseat, "he's got a bit of a temper, and he's not the brightest… but he's really good at taking pictures. He liked pretty things." He shrugged his shoulders and followed his brother into the van.

At this point Axel and Roxas were the only ones who had not been seated, so Axel took the opportunity to snag the window seat. He glided smoothly over the cool black vinyl until he reached the end of the bench. He motioned for the blonde to join him, who hesitantly did so. He followed shyly until he was perhaps a shade closer to Axel than he needed to be. He slammed the door shut before turning back to the redhead.

"Are there seatbelts in here?" he asked.

Axel laughed a little. "Sure there are, but we don't use 'em, 'cause there's only one per bench. Does this really seem like the kind of vehicle you'd use them in?"

Roxas turned a shade darker. "I guess not," he mumbled, "I was just wondering, feels weird not having one."

"Well, we can use it if you want—"

"It's fine, Axel!" he cried exasperatedly. Leon didn't seem to care either way, as he had started the van and was now backing out of his spot and starting to drive, seatbelts or not.

Axel would've found something witty to say as a retort had he not spotted Marluxia, turned fully around and staring at them from his perch in the front seat.

"What?" he said warily, beginning to feel a little creeped out.

"Hmm? Oh nothing," said Marluxia dreamily, twirling a finger through his wispy pink locks, "You guys are just too cute together. Are you dating?"

He and Roxas both exchanged looks of horror.

"What? No! Don't be stupid, Marls," said Axel defensively

At the exact same time, Roxas exclaimed, "Of course not!"

Marluxia touched two fingers to his perfect pouty lips and giggled. "I thought so, " he said, more to himself than them, and turned back around to face front.

"Don't mind him," said Axel, loudly enough for everyone to hear, "he just doesn't realize that not everybody spends their free time fucking everything and anything that walks, like himself." The entire van sniggered, save for Leon, who was used to childish behavior from them.

"You're one to talk," Marluxia replied accusingly, checking his reflection in the overhead mirror, "Demyx told me what you did. He told me you did the deed with Larxene."

Leon, who had remained silent the entire time, finally chimed in. "You're kidding me. The Larxene? As in that crazy blonde bimbo you introduced me to, the one with the infatuation for knives? "

"That's the one," Marluxia said cheerfully.

Leon inspected Axel from the rearview mirror, as if to try to verify what he'd just been told. Axel grinned sheepishly at him.

"Huh. Kinky," he said, shifting his focus back to the road.

"Very funny guys. I don't even remember it… Come to think of it, I really hope she's clean…" Axel mused. At this, Roxas scooted several inches away from him.

Marluxia laughed, "You know, I don't even know. I never asked her. Noticed anything unusual downstairs?"

Axel shook his head, "Not that I'm aware of no."

"Could we please, like, not talk about this," Roxas interjected quickly, looking anxiously between Axel and Marluxia.

"What's got you so hot and bothered, Roxy?" Axel teased, nudging Roxas in the gut with his elbow.

"Shush, Axel. His poor virginal ears can't handle such talk!" the pinkette exclaimed in a dramatic falsetto.

Roxas flicked him on the back of his head, causing the man to squeal impressively and immediately begin smoothing out his perfectly teased hair, which had not been bothered in the first place. "No. I just don't exactly feel like listening to you two talk about your crazy sexcapades, or sex lives in general. Or talk about mine, for that matter."

"Or lack therof," Axel muttered to himself so that only Roxas could hear.

"Oh shut up," he snapped, "how long should it take to get there, Leon?"

"Only a couple of minutes," Leon responded mechanically, "but the road will get pretty dangerous when we arrive, so getting to our actual destination will take a little bit."

"Okay," said Roxas, leaning back and wiggling into the cushions to get comfortable. "Fine by me," he sighed tiredly. He was a sleeper then? Interesting…

After about five or ten minutes, the blonde's blinking was becoming less often, he spent more time with his eyes closed. Finally, Axel could tell he had nodded off completely by the steady and even breaths he was making, and suddenly he dropped his head heavily onto Axel's shoulder. As surprised as he was, he made no attempt to push Roxas off of him, party because he kind of liked him there, and also because waking him up would probably result in a very grumpy Roxas. And Axel was beginning to like the not-grumpy Roxas he was becoming acquainted with.

Soon though, the red-brown dirt road they were driving on slowly began to morph in color; the brown became a bland and dusty magenta, then turned all out purple, and finally to blue. The sides of the narrow road became jagged and clean cut, taking on an almost crystal-like appearance. Pebbles glittered on the ground like little diamonds as the off-road wheels sent them in a spray behind the large vehicle. They were getting close.

Axel gripped one of Roxas' shoulders and gently tried shaking him awake.

"Roxy," he said lowly, in a near whisper, trying not to startle him too much, "Roxas, wake up, you don't wanna miss this."

His cerulean eyes shot open. "Wasn' sleepin…" he mumbled. He tried bringing his arms up to rub his eyes and stretch, only to find his arms wrapped around Axel's waist. His eyes widened considerably and he pushed himself to the other side of the bench.

"Shit! I'm so sorry man! I tend to—umm—_cuddle _everything when I sleep."

So he was a sleeper _and _a cuddle. How adorable.

"S'not a problem," said Axel, "I just woke you up to tell you that we're starting to get near the falls. I figured you'd want to see everything there was to see."

Roxas abruptly changed his facial expression from one of shock and worry to one of pure excitement. He all but leapt right across Axel's lap and pressed both hands up against the windows like a little kid looking into a candy shop.

"Whoaaaaaaaaa…"

The choppy, crystalline cliffs began to rise, higher and higher. They were a very deep blue, and sparkling but not quite clear enough to see through. One growth followed another, until they were driving through a deep chasm, slowly rising up to wind around the mountainside. The opposite side of the road forebodingly began to sink. Leon slowed the van to a crawl. They were literally driving on a winding mountain road; there were no guard rails, so if the van went off the narrow path, that was it. They'd fall god knows how many hundred feet to the jagged rocks below. Sweet.

Then, Axel saw it. Tinted a rosy pink from the sediment deposits underground, a thin stream of water _rose,_ from a little crevice, peaking out between the juncture of the ground and sharp decline of the wall. It glittered, just like the blue rocks did. Roxas whipped his head around to face Axel.

"D-did you see that!" he asked in an excited whisper, eyes wide. No matter how hard that mountain tried, its blue would never ever have anything on Roxas'.

"I saw it, Roxas!" Marluxia exclaimed, "Did you know that the rose was named because of these falls? Yep! Because of the coloring, and, obviously, it was derived from the word 'rise,' or more commonly, rose, as the falls do."

"This useless bit of information was brought to you by… Marluxia! The queen of roses himself!" said Axel sarcastically.

"And here I thought the rose was named after your hair," Zexion chimed in.

Marluxia's face fell. "Awe, Zexy, I thought you were on my side!"

"_Never _call me Zexy," the young man said, his eyes suddenly flashing in a way so dangerous that even Marluxia recoiled. "But he is right, by the way, these falls are the origin of the rose's name."

"Shh! Look!" said Roxas, pointing out the window. For a moment Zexion looked like he might retort, possibly never having been shushed before, but instead chose to follow Roxas' captivated gaze outside. The water was streaming with abundance now, through what appeared to be a gap between the road and the cliff face. It rose more slowly than water generally fell, it's smooth surface reflecting the glowing early morning sun.

"This sure beats my usual ride to work," Axel mused quietly.

"Ch'ya got that right," said Marluxia.

"It's _beautiful,"_ said Roxas in awe.

"Mm-hmm," Lexaeus grunted in agreement.

Even Leon added, "It is quite something."

For a few minutes the entire van stayed silent, the only sound being the constant sound of tired roughing up gravel, crystal pebbles continued to fly behind the van like pixie dust.

They rounded a corner, finally reaching what Axel assumed was the summit. The top of the mountain was surprisingly quite crater-like, all of the water from below collecting in a colossal lake at the top, which was to be collected, sent through treatment, and sent throughout the city. Several rocks surfaced along the edges of the 'lake' along with several in the center. Unlike the stones of which the falls were made, these were perfectly clear, every facet defined.

The sun was just starting to peek through the clouds, which were still pink from the sunrise, though a few patches of sky that was not obscured showed a pale blue, when the van skidded to a stop as they approached the edge of the 'lake.' The view of Hollow Bastion was unbelievable. They could see the entire city, all the way to the great maw on the south side. It didn't seem so big from up here.

"Wow," said Roxas breathlessly, "Look at this place."

"Forget looking Roxy, let's go check it out!" said Axel excitedly. Still being a child at heart, he pointed over towards a series of crystal rocks protruding from the glossy lake, "_that's _where all the action is!"

"What makes you think we're going out there, Axel?" Leon asked in his bossiest boss voice.

"I may not know much about ads, Squally," Axel began, "But I do know that _that,"_ he jabbed a thumb towards the city, "would make a really shitty background with _that _here for comparison." He pointed towards a particular glacier-like block with a flat surface large enough for a dozen or so people to stand on and a towering wall of ten or fifteen feet. The place was like an ice palace, where else would they shoot?

Leon pinched the bridge of his nose, not even bothering to correct Axel for calling him Squall. "Please be careful," he groaned.

Axel could swear he heard Roxas whisper, "Yes!" before the smaller blonde man yanked open the sliding door impatiently and leapt out. He waited against the front and waited for Axel to catch up.

"What? Scared to go first?" Axel taunted.

"_No_," said Roxas defiantly, looking scornful.

Axel laughed. "It's just as well," he said, "this way here I'll know which ones I can handle. After all, if your short ass can make it—"

"Shut up!"

Lexaeus, apparently, decided that _he _would be the one to go first. He zoomed past them and trekked easily across the rocks in long, heavy strides. Zexion scampered quickly after his brother, though not quite so easily, he managed to keep a steady pace.

"Well, at least we know it's not slippery," Axel concluded, "'cause to me it looks like ice." He looked back at Roxas and gestured towards the lake, "Shall we?"

Roxas nodded firmly and set off towards the rocks, as if he were starting some great adventure, with Axel flanking him. It wasn't very much different from crossing a creek, albeit the rocks were much harder, and pointier, considering their crystalline structure. What concerned Axel most was how deep the water was. Looking through his shadow on the surface (where there was no glare from the sun) he could see all the way to the bottom, where the crusty rocks glittered almost menacingly.

Suddenly his attention was turned back to Roxas when he slipped, lost his balance, and almost fell in. Without a second thought, Axel lunged forward and took hold of his arm, steadying him and preventing his untimely demise.

"Careful," he said lightly, releasing Roxas' arm as soon as he was sure he was balanced.

"That's twice you've saved my life," Roxas mumbled.

"Well, maybe if you weren't such a _klutz_," Axel teased. "Well, you could be worse off, look at Marly."

They both turned back to see Marluxia trying to cross in stilettos. Every step was wobbly, and occasionally he stumbled, flailing his arms wildly and shrieking. Roxas laughed out loud at the sight.

"Well, I don't know about you, but I'd much rather be on solid—well, solid-_er _ground," he said, looking fearfully at the water below. "I mean, I can swim but I bet it's really cold."

"Agreed," said Axel. They both turned back around and finished their "journey" uneventfully. When they finally reached the great rock, out of breath, Axel seated himself next to Zexion, who was leaning casually up against the almost mirrorlike wall.

"So how'd we do?" Roxas asked jokingly.

Zexion looked down and pinched the bridge of his nose, in a perfect impression of Leon. "I saw that fall," he said, imitating their boss' voice as well, "watch yourself next time, yeah?"

Axel and Roxas both laughed, Roxas slumped down the wall to sit next to Axel. Meanwhile Lexaeus, who had been watching their banter silently, leaned down to nudge Zexion, forcing the blue haired man to look up at him.

"Yes, Lexy? What is it?"

"Pull?" he asked questioningly, his head cocked to the side like a curious puppy.

"Yes, I think so," said Zexion in a reassuring tone of voice, giving his older brother a gentle pat on the shoulder. Lexaeus turned back around and smiled to himself. Axel and Roxas exchanged looks at the odd conversation that had taken place.

"What's that about?" Axel asked.

"Don't worry about it," said Zexion indifferently.

Axel shrugged and took a minute to look around at the scenery. He suddenly wished he had a camera of his own, to shoot himself just one picture of this place. As terrible as his photographing skills were, he couldn't imagine going wrong capturing something so beautiful. Suddenly everything seemed so serene to him. The sun shone freely now, rays shining across the sky and piercing through the rising stalagmites, throwing off a sparkling rainbow of colors in all directions. The sun left a trail across the 'lake,' which rippled in the breeze. A feeling of contentment and tranquility settled inside of Axel.

Roxas crawled forward to the edge of their little sanctuary and plunged his hands into the water. As soon as he had done so, he squealed in a pitch Axel hadn't thought possible of him.

"Holy fuck, it's cold!" he screeched.

Axel chucked. "Well then why'd you go and do that?" he asked amusedly.

"I wanted to see if it tasted any different," Roxas explained, "You know, without all that filtering crap they put it through. Do you realize how much disgusting metal this stuff had to go through before it reaches your sink? I don't, but I don't really wanna find out, either."

"Wow, I never thought of that," said Axel. He made a mental note to never bring that up around Demyx, since he was so OCD about his water already.

Roxas brought his hands, cupped together, out of the water and tipped his head down to drink. Watching made Axel thirsty.

"Mm!" the blonde grunted before he was done swallowing, "It's really good! Seriously, get over here, you gotta try it!"

Axel really wasn't up to moving at the moment, much less making his already nippy hands that much colder, but he crawled foreward nonetheless and following Roxas' lead, submerging his ungloved hands into the slushy, half frozen water. The blonde was right, it was freezing, to the point where it seemed to bite at his fingertips before numbing them completely. He, however, managed to go without screaming.

"You're crazy, kid," he said, quickly lifting his shaking hands out of the water and to his lips. Roxas might have been crazy, but he was also right.

It was beyond Axel how a tasteless liquid could have a distinguishable flavor, but it did. As if to emphasize just how metallic his regular drinking water was, it tasted almost sweet. He didn't want to relate the taste to dirt, because dirt tasted (yes, Axel knew what dirt tasted like) but it carried the same natural signature. It was like drinking rain water, straight out of the sky. Even the Atlantean water that Demyx sometimes brought from home didn't have anything on this.

"Wow," he said, smacking his lips, "you're right. Except now my hands are about to fall off." He stuffed them into his pockets in an attempt to warm them up a bit.

"Awe, boohoo," said Roxas, smirking.

_Boohoo, my ass_, Axel thought deviously to himself. He shot his hands out as quickly as he could and touched his fingers to the base of Roxas' neck, eliciting a loud squeal from the blonde.

"Gah! Cold! Cold hands!" he shrieked, reflexively scrunching his shoulders up and clamping his neck and shoulder together to try to expel the object, but all it did was effectively warm Axel's hands up much more than they had been.

"Dammit, Axel, what was that for?" Roxas demanded angrily, with as much pride as someone could after making a sound equivalent to that of a three year old.

"My hands were cold," said Axel nonchalantly, "and since it's _your _fault, I thought it only fair that _you _be the one to warm them up."

"Hmph. Keep your hands to yourself," said Roxas gruffly, turning his head in the other direction to try to hide the smile in his voice.

"Yeah, sure," said Axel dismissively, scooting back to his spot against the structure. Suddenly it occurred to him that he was at work. "Hey, shouldn't we be doing a shoot right now? We've been over here a good ten minutes, at least. Where's Leon?"

The four of them looked over to where the silver van was still parked, though now it was being accompanied by a black sports car. Marluxia was kneeling over on a rock in the middle of the lake, trying to remove his shoes to better hop along to his destination. Leon was standing by the cars, talking with someone Axel didn't recognize. The person was tall, almost as tall as Leon, and had long silver hair. Now that was pretty interesting, how many people do you see walking around with silver hair? At first Axel thought perhaps it was an elderly woman, but upon further inspection, he noticed the person's build and posture, and concluded that it was a man, and one not much older than himself. Maybe Zexion would know.

"Hey," said Axel, nudging the man next to him, "Do you know who that guy is over there? The one talking to Leon?"

Zexion followed Axel's gaze over to where to two men were talking. "I don't know," he said without much interest and shrugging his shoulders, "But my guess would be it's somebody from the water treatment facility. Either that or the person we're shooting for today. You know that sometimes they like to oversee."

Axel turned away from Zexion back to the van and saw that they were loading the equipment into a rather large rowboat. Marluxia, who had finally made it to their 'shore,' dropped his jaw upon seeing it.

"You're telling me," he seethed to apparently nobody, "that all this time we could've _taken the boat!"_ the last words came out in a furious screech, accompanied by much stomping of the feet. As a result, the sunglasses that had been seated atop his bouncy curls slipped off and fell into the water with a tiny splash, sinking God-knows-how deep into the abyss below.

"Those were special edition from _Valor_!" he cried helplessly, flinging himself desperately back to the edge as though this would prevent them from being gone forever. Because unless they magically ended up coming out someone's shower head, they weren't ever going to see the light of day again.

"Ain't that a shame," said Axel, noticing for the first time that they were _surrounded_ by crystal pebbles. He picked one up the size of a baseball and held it to the light, as if to inspect its legitimacy. It sparkled and threw off the rainbow, just as every crystal should.

"Here," he said, holding it out toward Marluxia even though they were six or seven feet apart, "this oughta cover for them."

Marluxia didn't even bother turning around to see what "this" was. "I don't want it," he said stubbornly.

"Oka-ay," said Axel, chucking the shimmering orb easily into the lake with a loud _KER-SPLUNK._ The splash that came from the impact splashed Marluxia right in the face.

He whipped his pink head around fast as lightning. At first Axel assumed he was going to bitch him out and throw a hissy fit for messing his hair up, but he didn't.

"Axel…" he growled, "Do you know how much that could've been _worth!"_

"No more than this one I'd imagine," said Axel smoothly, plucking a second one from the pile and tossing it back and forth to himself for the pinkette to clearly see.

Marluxia's face lit up like Christmas as he strode over to play in this pile of newly discovered treasures.

Axel picked one up that was the exact same shape and size of a walnut and pocketed it, with intentions of giving it to Demyx later. Even Roxas collected a little handful for himself, consisting of several stones, though all were no larger than that of an extravagant wedding ring.

"This isn't stealing, is it?" he asked concernedly, looking around for someone to slap him on the wrist.

"Nah," said Axel, "who would claim them?"

"Yeah, I guess that's true," Roxas mused. He scooped the little crystals up all at once and stored them in a pocket on his cargo pants, zipping them in for better security."

Leon and his silver-haired companion were now slowly approaching the glacier so, just in case they weren't actually supposed to be collecting gems as they were doing, all three of them stopped and pretended to be waiting patiently like good adults.

When the boat brushed up against the 'shore' Leon spoke, "This is Riku, everyone. He's a representative from Oathkeeper Jewlers, and he's here to monitor the shoot.

Zexion smirked to himself and gave Leon his attention. "So how is this going to work?"

"Put these on," Leon replied dully, tossing white garments over to Axel and Zexion.

"What the hell? You mean we're gonna have to _strip? _It's like, twenty degrees out here!" Axel shouted angrily.

"Well, if you'd waited five minutes before going on your little rock skipping adventure, you could've changed in the van," said Leon impatiently, tapping his foot like an angry mother. "Get to it. You too Roxas," he added to the blonde.

"W-what?" Roxas sputtered, blushing, "But why?"

"Because, Roxas," said Leon, the patience in his voice wearing dangerously thin, "The collection is supposed to be _angelic_. I'm well aware of you photographic skills , but as you can clearly see, I've got more than enough professional photographers here with me. Now, with this punk flamer and the little emo over there," he nudged his scarred face toward where the two men were changing, "the results would be far from angelic unless we put someone more innocent on the spot. And the only suitable person we could get today was you."

"I see," said Roxas through gritted teeth. He grimaced and snatched away the fluffy white clothing Leon held out for him.

Axel didn't watch as Roxas changed. He didn't! Cross his heart, hope to die, he did not stoop as low as to perv around watching Roxas as he was stripped of his pride, and his clothing, because come on, even he knew where to draw the line when it came to poor little blondes changing against their will.

But he might've _peeked_ once or twice.

Well, seeing as he was already dressed (in some ridiculous fluffy white sweater and scarf combo that was probably worth more than his rent) and waiting for Marluxia to finish with Zexion's hair and makeup, he didn't have much else to do, did he? The blonde was almost done anyway.

He saw as Roxas picked up the last garment, his mouth falling open in a petrified look of shock and horror. The expression was so comical that Axel had to stifle a giggle.

"Leon!" the blonde cried angrily, "This is a _fucking corset!"_

"Hmm?" said Leon absently; he had resumed his conversation with the one called Riku after he'd finished scolding Roxas the first time, "Oh, yeah. The idea is to look as feminine as possible. I assure you, Oathkeeper pays extremely generously.

Roxas turned back toward the wall and started fidgeting with the _risqué _bit of clothing. It was made of white suave, with a faux-fur trim that sparkled. The laces were also sparkling, Axel had a feeling that the poor kid would be covered with glitter by the time they were done here. Though, judging by the arsenal that Marluxia had equipped himself with, Axel probably would be too.

It was obvious that Roxas had never worn a corset before, as he was trying to put it on backwards _and _tie it from behind.

"Here," said Axel, approaching him, "let me."

At first Roxas was stubborn and determinedly continued to tie his laces the wrong way, but after a moment or so he gave up, letting his hands fall uselessly to his sides and let Axel spin it around and take over.

"You would know how to lace a corset," Roxas sneered as Axel set his long, slender fingers to work.

"The longer you stay in the biz, the more you pick up," said Axel neutrally, "You'd be surprised at how many things I've had to wear in my time, and I've only been working for _Poir _since I was eighteen. I also know how to walk in heels. Slight pull," he added quickly, to warn Roxas before he looped the laces around his fingers and yanked, causing the bodice to compress tightly around Roxas' midsection.

Apparently Roxas wasn't prepared for it, because he gasped loudly and whipped his hands out to grip Axel's forearms, scratching with his claws.

"I told you there would be a pull," Axel responded calmly, gently pulling each of the small, childlike hands off of his arms.

Roxas didn't say anything, but after several quick, shallow breaths he nodded, giving Axel the okay to continue.

"One more," said Axel after a few minutes, by which time Roxas was accustomed to the constant pulling. He gave one final tug, leaving a perfectly tied knot right over the blonde's toned (not that Axel had been looking) chest.

Roxas stood up, though he wobbled slightly, and used the gleaming wall behind them as a mirror, checking out his reflection.

"I look like a _chick_," he said, horrified, "like a slutty slutty chick!"

"Nah, you look sexy," said Axel appreciatively, "and you look classier than a slut. More like a burlesque queen if you want my opinion."

"That's not _helpful_," Roxas replied stiffly.

"Well, the sooner we do the shoot, the sooner you can get out of that monkey suit and breathe again, so scoot your sexy little ass over to hair and makeup so we can get this thing over and done with."

Roxas seemed to see the logic in that, because without another word he turned around and strutted bravely over to Marluxia, who was waiting for them, expectantly whacking his hand with a rather large hairbrush and wearing a devilish grin.

Twenty minutes later the two men (both of whom were covered in slivery blue glitter) headed over to join Zexion, who was leaned against his same spot on the wall, awaiting further instruction.

"Alright, everyone ready? Good! Let's get started. I know you're new at this, Roxas, but just bear with us," said Marluxia, who had taken the liberty of also covering himself in a generous amount of glitter.

"Whatever," said Roxas, his teeth chattering from the cold, "J-just hurry up with this, or you'll get a fuzzy picture from me s-shivering so much!"

Instinctually, Axel wrapped his arms around the blonde's waist from behind and pulled him closer, in an attempt to share his body heat and warm the boy up a little. It had absolutely _nothing _to do with his want to touch Roxas, so get the idea out of your head, you!

"Better?" he asked.

"Yeah, actually. How are you so warm?" Roxas asked incredulously. His teeth stopped chattering. Axel just shrugged his shoulders.

"I don't know, I've always been that way. I guess I just run hot. It doesn't bother me any, since it comes in handy in situations like these."

"OMIGAWD!" Marluxia suddenly exclaimed, "None of you move! Stay right there and make shy faces!"

That couldn't have been too hard for Roxas, given he was standing in a white tutu and corset with another man's arms wrapped around him. Axel attempted to form an innocent smile, imperceptibly pulling Roxas a little bit closer to him.

"Oh! Inspired!" Marluxia exclaimed cheerfully. "Seriously, you guys have no idea how cute you are!"

"That's… great, Marly," said Roxas, detangling himself from Axel's grip, "What now?"

The next half hour or so was spent being poked and prodded by Marluxia, and blinded by the flash of the camera, then the following ten minutes the same with Leon. Then the _next _forty-five minutes spent with Roxas, who had insisted on taking a turn. Riku all the while had just stood to the side, either looking about at the scenery or staring ahead blankly, a bored look glazed over his eyes.

"Sorry," said Roxas apologetically when Axel had questioned why they were at this for so goddamned long. "I'm a perfectionist, so I have to take a whole bunch of different ones. I think I'm just about done though, so you two can start getting changed as long as nobody else wants a turn."

To Axel's surprise, Lexaeus shook his head, so he went to start getting changed as fast as possible, eager to get his winter boots and coat back on. Looking up once or twice, he could see the burly man shooting the landscape. Probably to make postcards or something, or maybe even to just keep the memory on paper, as Axel wanted to.

"So are we done here?" Axel asked, zipping up his pants.

"Not so fast," said Roxas, who had managed to wriggle himself out of the corset and change faster than Axel or Zexion had, "Give me my Brownie, Leon. And my Terry."

"Terry?" Leon deadpanned.

"The Olympus I came here with," said Roxas impatiently.

"Make it quick," he grunted, handing Roxas what he wanted and then turning around to finish loading their stuff.

"You know, I really hate point and shoots," Roxas mused, talking seemingly to nobody in particular, "But there's just something great about developing old fashioned film from an old fashioned camera."

"What's a Terry?" Axel asked curiously.

Roxas waved his second camera, a digital one that Axel thought he might have seen at his apartment, "That's just what I call my Olympus," he said disinterestedly, "Giving it a name just seemed more attractive than running around calling it E-PI 1."

Axel didn't understand it, but then again, lots of artists were kind of eccentric that way. Demyx made a habit out of naming everything he owned, after all. Axel chose not to respond to Roxas, because he had started taking pictures, alternating cameras. Demyx had always told him to never bother somebody while they were making art. Or in his boyfriend's case, music. Axel figured that if music was art, then photography must be too, and judging by the concentrated look on Roxas' face, talking would just be a distraction.

"Okay, I'm ready," the blonde said finally, lowering his 'Terry,' as he called it.

"Could I get some copies of those?" Axel asked tentatively, "It's not every day you get to see the summit of Rising Falls."

"Of course," said Roxas, nodding.

They joined the rest of the men in the little rowboat and began to sail away from their little oasis, back to the silver van.

"Are you sure this boat can hold all of us?" Roxas asked concernedly, eyeing Lexaeus.

"Roxas, please. Everyone here weighs less than one hundred pounds, 'cept Lexy and maybe Leon," said Marluxia, twiddling his perfectly manicured thumbs, "how bout we sing some sailor songs?"

"No," a collective chorus rang from everybody else in the boat.

The sun broke through the clouds once again, the glittering rocks shining spectacularly in the midmorning light. Even though they'd only been there for a few hours, Axel felt sad to leave this place. It was so peaceful, tranquil and pure, contrary to the day to day life he'd have to go back to.

Rough stones scraped the underside of the boat loudly, and Axel knew it was time to go. It dawned on him that he might never see this place again. After all, technically he was never supposed to have been there in the first place. The only time he'd been in before was with Reno, they'd snuck in once, on a dare. But they never got anywhere near the top, just far enough to see one riding stream of water. But this was different. This was a once in a lifetime view, and Axel got to remember it forever.

Great… the memory of having the hots for his blonde photographer would be burned into his skull forever.

He shot a glance over at Roxas, who was climbing out of the rowboat and unloading his own equipment. The blonde seemed to realize he had eyes on him, because he shifted his gaze up to meet Axel's, before he had time to look away and avoid discovery.

To his surprise though, instead of shooting him a Roxas-glare, or rolling his pretty blue eyes, the blonde gave him a shy little smile, the corners of his totally kissable pink lips curving upwards.

"What?" he asked, in a shy voice equivalent to his smile, and… was that a giggle Axel caught? Damn in that kid would be the death of him.

"You still have glitter on your face," Axel lied smoothly, bearing his signature smirk, "Need some wings with that, Angel?"

Roxas' jaw dropped. "I know you _did not_ just call me angel, he snarled, bearing his teeth menacingly.

Marluxia seemed to decide it was a good idea to throw in, "Angel? Naw, he seems more like a faery to me."

"Are you kidding?" Axel replied, "Look at him, he's got the blonde hair and blue eyes and everything! His whole persona screams, 'look at me, I'm innocent.'" He grinned.

"Axel?" Roxas asked seductively. Surprised at the sudden tone, Axel turned back to seem him advancing on him, slowly, half lidded. Axel froze. There wasn't anything else he could do. The blonde beauty quite literally had him under a spell. Maybe he was a faery after all.

"W-wha—?"

Roxas was an arm's distance away, and _he didn't stop. _He put a hand on each shoulder, rearing up on his tiptoes, and then—

_SPLASH!_

Axel was overcome with the sensation of being submerged in icy water. The rocky shore was shallow, but not so shallow that Axel didn't get soaked from head to toe, just shallow enough for him to scrape his palms trying to break his fall. Desperate to get away from the bitter sting of the wintry lake, he sprung up wildly, shaking, and scrambled out of the puddle.

Marluxia was doubled over, laughing at him, and Roxas was just standing there, looking like a smug little shit.

_Oh no he didn't._

Axel was trembling violently. Goose pimples pricked all the way up his arms and legs, giving him the sensation of being stabbed all over with tiny little icepicks. He hated water, and just tossing him in _alone _was one thing, but then tossing him into _freezing _water. Well, there are some lines you just don't cross.

"Not so angelic now, am I?" said Roxas with a smirk, looking rather pleased with himself.

Axel shook his shaggy mane like a dog, plotting the boy's untimely demise, then started towards him. The grin abruptly vanished, and as replaced with a look of horror. Instead of tackling and/or jumping Roxas (like he _wasn't _planning to do) he thought of something much better. He did tackling the blonde, in a way, in a freezing, soaking hug.

Roxas shrieked loudly, in as Axel now dubbed it, the 'cold, wet Roxas screech.' And damn, that boy could sing. The shriek was so loud and clear as a bell, Axel almost let him go to clutch at his ringing ears and beg for mercy. Almost.

"Mother of _fuck, _Axel, you're fucking freezing!" He whined, struggling against Axel's vice-like grip, "Let me go, you're getting me all wet!" Axel struggled not to laugh and make an innuendo.

"You're telling _me,_" he replied moodily, with no intentions of letting Roxas go, "If you can't handle the burn, you shouldn't play with fire. Or—uhh, in this case, if you can't handle the frostbite… whatever. _You _did this and _you're _warm. So now _you _have to pay the price."

"Stop being a bitch, Axel," said Leon moodily, "I have towels."

He tossed Axel two. "Put the other one down on the seat, I don't want you ruining the material."

Axel nodded and climbed into the van, which was slightly warmer than it was outside. Roxas followed cautiously, as if he were scared that Axel would 'attack' him again. And he was right. As soon as he'd scooted all the way into the vehicle, Axel latched onto him like a parasite, shivering the way a wet cat would.

"Okay, okay! Jeez, enough already, I get the point! I've been punished!" He huffed exasperatedly.

"N-no," Axel chattered, "It's not that. I'm really really cold. And you actually are warm. I h-hate water."

"Oh," said Roxas, his tone much softer and almost hinting at apologetic, "I didn't know, I'm sorry I pushed you in." When Axel didn't reply, he added, "You seem pretty warm to me now, actually, now that your skin's lost its chill."

"M'always warm," he replied neutrally, the jerky trembling starting to subside a little bit, "Which is why water feels so cold to me. It's like how everything is freezing when you have a fever, because you're hotter than everything else around you. No pun intended."

Roxas relaxed a little with a sigh and allowed Axel to cling to him like a child. "I guess that makes sense. I guess I-I'll try to be as warm as possible then." He chuckled nervously underneath Axel.

"You're very warm," Axel reassured him. The heat from the van was starting to kick in now, but he found himself not wanting to let go of Roxas. As soon as the thought crossed his mind he stiffened, realizing he'd spent yet another day with Roxas, and though thoughts of Demyx _had _been swimming at the brink of his mind (he'd been thinking of minds in terms of oceans far too often lately) they had been in no danger of surfacing. He'd all but forgotten Demyx until now, except in passing thought. Now that he'd come up again, the guilty feeling he'd become familiar with was starting to creep through his veins, settling in all the most uncomfortable parts of him. The more and more he fought this, the farther he seemed to slip away from his lover and closer to the enchanting blonde that he now had his arms around. This wasn't going away. This couldn't be ignored. He had to come clean to both men. Maybe not at the same time, but they both needed to know.

Was it okay for Axel to say he was scared?

**A/N Poor Axel, I really oughta cut him some slack... BUT I probably won't. He's getting himself into shit, he's gonna have to get himself out(;**

**Anyway, it also occured to me that the lines i make in a word document don't register on here so I took you through a bunch of chapters with no page breaks! So if you got like a million alerts from this story, it's because I was fixing them. Sorry if I got your hopes up :3 (- *cough* Narcissist.) **

***dramatically gets on the floor and begs* Reviews? *gives puppy eyes* P-p-p-please?**


	6. Confession?

**Chapter Six is heeeeeeeeere! Thank you, thank you, thank you all for being so patient with me, I know it's been like, over two weeks since I last updated! My excuse this week is that it was finals week and I had to devote all my time to studying! *cough, what's studying?* **

**In other news, HOLY CRAP YOU GUYS! OVER 2000 HITS! *faints* That's more than like, four times what my first story got. **

**Also, in regards to the story. The company that Axel and Roxas work for, Poir? It's pronounced Pwah. I guess the idea for it was to be like, French-ish? I got it from once of the many strange and impractical nicknames I have, Mz. Puaw. Yep, thought I'd share that fun fact with you. Anywayssss, I got some new characters for you this week! Enjoy!**

_How exactly did I get myself into this situation? Oh yeah, I had to be stupid and have a soft spot for certain REDHEADS. What the fuck am I gonna do now? I suppose I could just wiggle around… nope, that's not doing the trick. Great Axel, I'm about to have heatstroke 'cause you're so fucking hot… FUCK, that's not what I meant! Shut up, brain, you're not helping my situation any!_

Axel _finally _decided to detach himself from Roxas and was now leaning up against the window, staring out to the wide rising falls, though how he could see them, Roxas didn't know; the windows were now covered in spray from the water to the point where it was impossible to see anything. Funny, in the fifteen or so minutes they'd spent inching down the mountainside, Roxas had put little to no thought to the physics-defying structure he'd been so excited to see.

He didn't even question why he'd let himself open up to Axel again, just like he told himself he _would not do_ only the night before, because by now it had become clear to him that he simply did not have his head when he was around Axel. An image burst into his head that he absolutely could not get out; a giggling Pence, rocking backwards and forwards, happy as can be, atop Cloud's bed.

"_Sounds like you liiiiiiiike him."_

Olivia, staring at him hard through cloudy green eyes, _"How cute is he? Do you LIKE him?"_

"_-Roxas' new boooooooooyfrieeeend."_

"_-You're bi, dude."_

"—_Maybe you SHOULD go for dream boy."_

"ENOUGH!" he felt like screaming. He couldn't confront this right now. He just couldn't. Not with Axel sitting right next to him. Actually, perhaps it _was _best to make such decisions now while Axel was present. That way, when Roxas decided to go back to reality to get his right mind back, he'd know exactly what to expect from himself.

_Well, what would Roxas do?_

A silly question to ask, since he _was _Roxas. But he was an utterly torn Roxas.

_Damn it, Axel, _he growled to himself in frustration, _what are you doing to me?_

He chanced a glance over to the redhead. He was just sitting there, completely oblivious, staring out the window without a care in the world. Roxas could see him sucking on the corner of one lip, and wondered idly what they tasted like. He thought back to the day before, scrolling through his memories, trying to recall if he'd been able to taste Axel. It wasn't surprising that he couldn't, as both (two! TWO damn kisses in ONE day!) were half-assed and completely unintentional, at least on Roxas' part. He sort of felt jipped, he had to carry around the guilt of kissing someone, a guy no less, who wasn't his girlfriend and he didn't even get the full experience!

He wanted it. He wanted them. Everyone else, be damned, he _knew _that Axel liked him. Maybe he'd been trying (an adorable, yet fruitless attempt) to cover it up, but there was really no getting around it. So damn it, if Roxas wanted to kiss him, he was going to.

But not without being a gentleman and asking for permission first.

* * *

><p>Roxas decided to wait until after they got back to the crumpled, dying building before he said anything, he didn't want that pink-haired fool hounding them the whole time. The ride back seemed to take <em>hours<em>, or at least, much longer than it'd taken to get there. Maybe it was because Roxas had fallen asleep on the way.

Finally the blue gravel faded to brown, and brown gravel became asphalt, taking them back to society and into reality.

"Who wants a ride home?" Marluxia asked as they pulled past the wrought-iron gate and around to the back of the ruined building.

"I live on the north side, it's out of your way," said Axel who was on the window seat again. He motioned for Roxas to get out of the van, so that he could too. Roxas didn't move just yet, thought, since he didn't want Axel running away on him.

"I'll walk," he said calmly, "I could use the exercise."

"Suit yourself," said Marluxia, shrugging, "come on then, you two," he said, gesturing towards Lexaeus and Zexion.

Roxas hopped out of the vehicle to give the brothers more room, Axel following closely behind.

"Thanks for coming today," said Leon, addressing all of them, "Since _Oathkeeper _is a private company, you'll all be receiving checks in the mail under my name in a few weeks."

They all nodded to show their acknowledgement, then the group parted and went their separate ways. The brothers and Marluxia headed toward his ridiculous hot-pink convertible, Leon stayed put in his van, and Axel and Roxas started to walk down the driveway, which was really more like a private road, since it stretched for such a long distance.

Axel walked alongside him, though he kept his gaze strictly glued to the road, and his mouth clamped shut tightly. He looked… troubled?

When Marluxia drove past, he honked playfully at them. Roxas waved to everyone in the car to be friendly and waited for the feminine convertible to disappear from sight.

"Axel, we need to talk," he stated boldly, surprising himself. He sounded much more firm out loud than he did in his mind. This was the first time he would actually address the mutual attraction that he thought (and admittedly hoped) was radiating between them. Before now, it was like some unspoken secret, avoided by both parties. Roxas wasn't sure what Axel's problem was, since he _was _openly gay, but he intended to find out. He wanted to know if this shit was for real.

As soon as Axel's piercing viridian gaze was shifted to him, he immediately lost his nerve, "I—you… I mean, uhh…"

"Spit it out, Roxy," said Axel cheerfully, "don't get all tongue-tied on me now."

"Damn it, Axel!" he exploded. Usage of the playful pet name was the last straw, "Could you maybe be serious for twenty goddamn seconds!" His outburst seemed to have stunned Axel into silence. He stopped walking and stared at Roxas as if he had multiple heads.

"Sorry," Roxas added quickly, "I wasn't trying to be like, a bitch or anything, I'm just kinda stressed right now and I'm trying to talk to you but I can't seem to get any of it out and dear, lord, now I'm babbling and—what the heck are you sitting down for?"

Axel had plopped his rear end right at the side of the road, regardless of the fact that the ground was probably freezing and he was surrounded by trees, shrubs, fallen leaves, moss and pinecones. "You wanted to talk," he said simply, "So we're gonne sit down, and we're gonna talk. But if you want to keep the conversation serious, you're gonna have to actually address a serious topic, 'cause I still have no idea what's gotten you so hot and bothered."

"Do you like me, Axel?" Roxas blurted out before he could stop himself. Well, shit, he couldn't very well back down now, so, gathering up all the courage he could muster, he took a seat next to the redhead, who'd stiffened considerably at the question.

"Why?" he asked warily.

"Ugh! Because," Roxas threw his hands up in the air in exasperation and let out everything he'd had to say to Axel since day one, "You flirt like a _machine._ You call my Roxy, you can never keep your freakin' hands off me! You're always saying I'm like, pretty and stuff. And as if that wasn't enough, maybe you forgot but you also _kissed me _yesterday! So tell me, do you have feelings for me, or are you the biggest tease on the goddamn planet? You need to tell me, because I don't know." He finished, completely out of breath and shaking a little bit. How embarrassing.

Axel ran a hand through his scarlet tresses, not meeting Roxas' eyes, "I guess I haven't been completely honest with you, Blondie—"

"Roxas," said blonde corrected.

"Roxas," Axel agreed, "Anyway, to answer your questions," he took a deep breath, "Yeah, I like you. But…" he trailed off, as if he really didn't want to finish his sentence at all. Oh, no, Roxas would be having none of that. He finally got him to admit something, he was going to hear the whole story.

"But what?" he probed.

"What about your girl?" Axel asked, concern showing on his face. Oh. Right, he'd brought up a decent point. What about Naminé?

Roxas shrugged, "I don't think she was ever really my girl," he said, "We weren't ever really more than friends." Well, gee, where'd that come from? He'd never even thought those things to himself! But he supposed, considering it, that it was the truth.

Axel gave a resigned sigh, like he was angry with himself, "So there you have it, Bl—Roxas… yeah," he finished awkwardly, "So if you're gonna like, castrate me, just do it now."

This remark made Roxas genuinely laugh out loud, "I'm not gonna castrate you, Axel," he giggled, trying to contain himself and be serious again, "I'm going to kiss you."

Axel stopped looking at the ground finally. In fact he snapped his head up at an astonishing speed, looking at Roxas in shock, as if he'd never heard of such a thing as kissing.

"R-really?"

Roxas was tired of talking. He'd gathered up enough nerve to take him this far, he didn't want to back down now. So he just rolled his eyes, and grabbed Axel by his shirt collar to keep him still. He leaned forward and pressed his lips up against the redhead's, like he'd been wanting to do for… longer than he was willing to admit to himself.

Even though Roxas did warn him, he grunted in surprise at the sudden contact. Not to be deterred by Axel's lack of response, Roxas shut his eyes and slid his hands from the shirt collar, to the base of Axel's neck, then through his hair. Then, hesitantly Axel began to kiss back. Roxas had really missed this. Some people were sex addicts, some people preferred to cuddle. But Roxas, his favorite thing was to kiss and be kissed. So one could imagine how his heart soared jubilantly when Axel wound his arms around his waist and enthusiastically returned the kiss, sneaking his tongue in between the other's parted lips.

After a short fight for dominance (Axel being the winner) they slowed it down a notch, each taking time in exploring the other's mouth. Roxas slowly began to learn what Axel liked, what he didn't like, which actions and touched prompted positive responses. By the time they broken apart, Axel's back was up against a tree, the slight blonde somewhat straddling his legs, with his hands placed slightly suggestively on his narrow hips. After he could get in a good breath or so, Roxas felt the soft petals touch his lips again.

After several minutes of short, gentle pecks went by, Roxas touched his forehead to Axel's, smiling shyly, though by now he wasn't feeling very shy at all. Being with him was simple, easy, beautiful, and not scary at all. It was like they fit together perfectly. He wanted to stay that way forever.

But of course he couldn't.

"What happens now?" Axel asked regretfully. He didn't want this sinful moment of bliss to end either.

"Now, we get up, and we go home, and we do what we always do when we go home," he smiled sadly, "And I get to go decide what to say to Naminé."

_Shit! Shit shit shit! _Axel screamed internally, _You need to tell him, RIGHT NOW. You damn pussy if you don't come clean, bad shit's gonna go down!_

"Are you sure about this?" he asked the blonde kindly. Pussy.

"Not at all," said Roxas, shaking his head, "but I can figure it out. I'm a big boy, time to make big boy decisions."

Axel tried his very best to resist making big boy comments. Roxas got off of him, offering a hand to help him up. At first he considered playfully rejecting it, as Roxas always seemed to do, but decided against it, since at this point he probably couldn't get up on his own anyway; his legs felt like jelly. Even after he was on his feet, Roxas didn't release his hand. Instead, he wrapped his fingers around Axel's, intertwining them. Despite the bitter cold autumn chill, Roxas' hands were surprisingly warm, and Axel wondered whether his own hands felt cold to the other boy.

The walked the length of the driveway, each contemplating what they were going to do about their lovers. Axel, meanwhile, was trying to figure out how to tell Roxas that _he _was the "other boy." How could he tell him without sounding like a total asshole? Maybe he was a total asshole.

_Come on, just come out with it before it's too late—_

"Umm, see you later I guess," said Roxas. They had reached the end of the driveway, and it was time for them to go their separate ways.

"Yeah… call me or something," said Axel, still trying to find the right words. Before he could get something out, Roxas stood up on his tiptoes and lightly kissed his cheek.

"Bye," he said quietly, releasing Axel's hand and walking away in the direction of his own home. Just like that, he was gone, and Axel didn't know what to do. Well he knew, but he didn't like it. He knew that he couldn't be with both Demyx and Roxas. Even if he _could _fool Demyx into thinking Roxas was just a friend with benefits, he wasn't capable of lying to him. And already he was attached to Roxas, there was no getting around it now.

His solution? Simple: Get wasted now, deal with his problem later. Or better yet, resolve the problem _while _wasted. The bar was bound to be full of people going through rough times, as he was. Maybe someone could give him advice. Then again, he considered, if they had a solution to problems such as this one they wouldn't be drinking, would they?

Before he could find out, though, he needed to find himself a new skateboard. Thankfully, the nearest sport shop he could get one in was in the mall complex, which was literally right in front of him. So, without a second thought, he headed towards the large building to purchase one. The mall, though large, thankfully was not crowded, as it was only the afternoon of a weekday. He soon passed the ice cream vendor that he and Roxas had bought ice cream at just the day before. It seemed like it'd been so much longer than that, and at the same time, the days had gone by in a blur. In less than a month the bewitching little blonde had managed to turn his whole world upside down.

Axel shook his head to himself and pressed on.

He was a regular at Struggle Sporting Goods, and luckily they still had the board Axel had purchased last time hanging on the back wall. He shimmied past a rack of BlitzBalls and closed his hands over the familiar grit. He checked out the front and back wheels to make sure they were aligned properly and took it once around the track meant for running shoes to get a feel for it before deciding it was the one he wanted. He grabbed a backpack to store it in on the way to the register.

The guy in front didn't make any small talk, so he got out of there pretty quickly. As soon as he was, he hopped onto the board and sped for the exit, disregarding completely the 'no skating' rule. It's not like he would care if they kicked him out, he was on his way out anyway.

He managed to make it outside without much trouble, though he may or may not have heard an indignant cry of, "Hey!" from a security guard near the exit. It didn't matter though, because now he was speeding down Main Street, with his and Demyx's favorite restaurant in mind. Before he made it, though, he realized that being there would only remind him of his boyfriend, who obviously he was trying to forget at the moment.

His eyes fell upon a very generic looking pub across the street. It looked pretty ratty and run-down, but in Axel's eyes, booze was booze, and he needed it immediately. So he crossed the street as quickly as he could without killing himself (though at that point it didn't seem like such a bad alternative) and entered the dimly lit building, making a beeline for the bar.

Before he reached it, however, he was stopped in his tracks by a mess of blonde spikes, whose owner was cleaning glasses with a dishrag behind the counter. It couldn't be Roxas, could it? Did he have a second job or something that Axel didn't know about? It came to his attention that being seen at a bar, obviously bent on getting drunk, would not look very good to Roxas at the moment. Maybe he could pretend to be meeting a friend? No, that was stupid, obviously he'd get the hint when nobody showed up.

He tried to hide himself from the blonde's line of sight, but it was too late. He'd looked up, and happened to catch Axel's eye…

And Axel relaxed immediately.

That wasn't Roxas. Axel had become so acquainted with the brilliant blue that were his eyes, he could pick it out anywhere. The cold gaze now locked with his was a much darker blue, the kind you would see while coloring with a plain old blue crayon. He could see now that he was also much taller than Roxas, and his hair was just a wee bit lighter. But damn, they looked a lot alike.

Not wanting to come off as some kind of creep, Axel continued towards the bar in long, confident strides, not bothering to break eye contact with the Roxas-look-alike since he'd have to talk to him in a minute anyway.

"Hey…" he greeted, sitting on the stool closest to the bartender, "Cloud," he finished, catching sight of the nametag.

Cloud… what an odd name. But Axel found he liked Roxas a bit better.

"What's your poison?" Cloud responded, sounding very bored. Yikes. Seemed like he could use some poison himself.

"Jack and Coke," Axel responded automatically, "And one for yourself. Seems like you need it."

"Can't drink on the job," he replied regretfully, "thanks for the thought, though. M' heading out for the dinner shift in a minute, so I'll get her to come take care of you." He pointed towards a slight brunette girl with wide, brown eyes, who'd walked in seconds after Axel and appeared to be heading for the back room.

"Sure, whatever," said Axel, settling better in his stool. The blonde-that-looked-like-but-wasn't Roxas left Axel alone at the bar. Thinking about it, Axel realized, it was kind of silly, to think anyone would be here so early in the evening; he was surprised it was even open.

He let his eyes wander around the place. It was very dim inside, with the exception of the small lamps that hung over each table. It wasn't crowed, nor was it deserted. Couples and families sat in crummy looking booths everywhere, though the volume never arose higher than a buzzing, or murmur, to Axel's ears. Who, he thought, would choose to eat at a place like this? Maybe the food was good…

"Hi! What was it Cloud said you wanted? Jack and Coke?"

Axel looked up to see the brunette girl bouncing her way over to him, and his first thought was, _Okay, this girl is way, way too energetic to be a barmaid. _

"Yeah," he replied dully.

"Coming right up!" She replied cheerfully. Was she even twenty-one? She looked like she was about twelve, and her overly bubbly mood was starting to get Axel even further down. He was almost starting to wish he'd been left with the almost-Roxas emo guy.

"Here ya go!" she said happily, pushing a fizzy pink drink in front of him, "Now before you say anything, don't worry, I only charged you for the Jack. Buuuut you seemed like you needed some _serious_ cheering up, so I made you my special. Enjoy!" She stuck a straw and a colorful little umbrella in between the ice.

Axel eyed the concoction skeptically. "What's in this? Fruit punch?"

"Cheery 7up," she corrected, "let it settle first, then if you suck it down really fast, it kinda tastes like a tootsie roll. It ya don't like it, I promise to get you your Jack on the house!"

Not about to deny the opportunity to possibly get a free drink, Axel did as he was told to find that it really did taste like a tootsie roll. It was strong, but actually quite good. For half a minute he considered telling her he didn't like it, just to get free booze, but decided against it, since chances were he'd probably order it again at some point later in the evening.

"It is good," he told her, "what else is in it?"

"Vodka, Kahlua, and this chocolate stuff I found in the back… umm, if you don't mind me saying so, you look like you've been having a pretty rough day," she remarked.

"Why else would I be here?" Axel replied dully.

The girl promptly set down the wet dishrag she was holding with a loud _smack,_ propped herself up over the counter, and leaned forward to stare at Axel, a commanding stare, with almost freakishly huge bug eyes. "Spill," she ordered.

"I don't want to talk about it," he sighed.

"Boy, you sure know how to bargain," she said, sounding a little miffed. She hopped back down and scampered over to the other side of the counter, where Axel could clearly see her mixing up a new drink. She returned in record time and set down the drink he'd originally ordered, "On me. Now, talk. It really does always help. That, and I'm bored."

What was with this chick? Was she so desperate for a story to go around giving people free drinks? He rolled his eyes. "I made out with a sexy blonde today."

She snorted, "Wow, that sounds _terrible._"

"Let me finish," said Axel, "See, he wasn't _my _sexy blonde. He's already got a woman," he sipped at his alcohol, "but I wish he was mine. Like I _really really _do. Now, if that weren't mildly upsetting to my human conscience, it would be just fine and dandy, because he wants to leave this girl for me."

"Youchies," she said. Was that even a word? "That'd be tough on anyone," she continued sympathetically, "is she a friend of yours or—?"

"Not at all," said Axel, "See, you're still not letting my finish. Not only does he have a girlfriend, I have a _boyfriend._ And my _boyfriend _isn't gonna reprimand me and/or leave me over something like kissing hot boys, because we have an _open relationship!_" He laughed, literally, because that was so much better than crying, "Yeah, he goes and just _fucks _other people all the time! All the time! I don't do that, nooooo, I don't even _like _sex that much. So why do I have to be the one that falls, possibly in _love,_ with somebody else? I never wanted either of us to ever want anyone else, but now I _do_, and I don't even know who to pick, and I just feel really bad for letting myself fall for the poor guy in the first place. He doesn't even know that I have a boyfriend…" he finished his rant and set back to his drink, taking heavy gulps.

It was a few minutes before she responded, she studied him intently and chewed on her lip, a regular habit of hers considering how chapped they were.

"And neither of them knows about the other?" She asked finally, in a much quieter tone than the one he'd become used to hearing from her. The story must have calmed her down a bit.

"No," he replied, "Well, my boyfriend knows, somewhat. But he just thinks that my plan is to just fuck him and be on my way. But I'm _not like that,_ I wouldn't. Not that he isn't totally fuckable, it's just that I can't do something like that. Cheating is cheating.

"I see," she muttered, "you really do have feelings for both of them, huh?"

"Yeah," Axel replied, "I feel like I shouldn't, because I haven't known the other one for very long at all. But yeah, I do. He's like… magnetic. And I still haven't told either one of them how I feel 'cause I'm scared of being alone."

She began bouncing on her heels, apparently back to her usual self. "Tell ya what I'm gonna do. When you're done with that," she nudged her head in the direction of his half-finished drink, "I'm gonna call you a cab, and it's gonna take you to a friend of mine. Go into the building, and tell the nun at the front that Yuffie sent you."

"Nun?" Axel questioned, "You're sending me to church?"

"That's right," she replied happily, "My friend in there, she might be able to help you out. See, dealing with issues like this isn't really my gig, but she'll know what to do."

"Maybe you didn't notice, but I'm _gay._ I was talking about _guys_," he hissed, "That means I'm a _fag. _Which means I'm gonna burn in hell, remember? Obviously I'm not welcome at any—"

She slapped a hand over his mouth almost harshly, silencing him.

"Don't talk like that," she commanded, for the first time taking on a rough, angry tone of voice, "You aren't going to burn in hell, and besides, everyone is welcome at church! Don't worry about it, she won't mind. She specializes in unorthodox cases, such as yours," she flashed him a smile.

He took one last gulp of his drink, leaving nothing but ice cubes and that silly umbrella. "Well, it's not like I have anything to lost. I only came here to kill time in the first place, to procrastinate going home and confronting my boyfriend."

"See? It all works out!"

Axel pulled out a little blue orb with a twenty on it and rolled it over the counter to her, "Get me one more of those while I'm waiting, please. And keep the change."

"Thank you!" She took the munny and disappeared into the back for a moment. When she came back, she fixed his drink and pushed it in front of him, adding yet another colorful umbrella. "Your ride is on its way."

_What am I getting myself into? _He thought to himself while absently stirring his drink with his straw.

"By the way, you look really familiar," the barmaid called Yuffie added, peering at him curiously from inside the glass she was holding.

"I'd be surprised if you didn't," he said. He wasn't stuck up, just stating a fact, "M' face is all over Hollow Bastion. I work for _Poir,_ see."

She snapped her fingers, "That's it! I see you on the subway every day on my way to work!" She squealed, "Wow, that's so cool! Can I like, get your autograph?"

He raised his eyebrows. What a strange little girl she was. One second, she'd be bouncing around like a rabbit on Adderall, next she'd be playing therapist, now she was squealing about models and asking Axel for his autograph. Well, it was the least he could do, she'd done a lot for him in the short time he'd spent at the bar.

"Sure. You got a pen?"

"Yep," she offered him an empty tab and a blue pen. In his best handwriting, he wrote_ Thanks for everything—Axel Sinclaire._

He handed the tab to her and she squealed, "Ooh! Thank you!"

"Uhh, don't mention it," Axel replied, hiding his face. He wasn't used to receiving extra attention for being a model. Sure, excited whispers followed him wherever he went, but nobody actually knew his name, or who he was. Being so known by thousands of total strangers was actually pretty uncomfortable. Especially since in half the ads he sees himself in, he was shirtless.

"Well, see you around I guess," she said, eyeing a few men who'd just arrived and were heading their way, "Good luck!"

She bounced down over to the end of the bar, waiting for the biker boys. Axel sucked down the rest of his drink and got up to leave, perhaps a little clumsily. Just before the door shut behind him, he heard Yuffie say in her upbeat voice, "_So, what's got you under a raincloud today?"_

While he was outside waiting for his ride, the blonde that looked like Roxas—Cloud, Axel recalled, stepped outside and crouched down next to Axel, pulling out a pack of cigarettes.

"You wanna smoke?" Cloud asked him. His voice was much deeper than Roxas'—damn it, wasn't Axel supposed to be trying to forget about him?

Never once in his life did Axel get the urge to suck smoke into his lungs. They didn't smell good and he'd inhaled a lot of smoke as a kid by accident from lighting so many things on fire. And really, it wasn't fun at all. But now… it didn't seem like such a bad idea. People seemed to do it a lot when they were under a lot of stress, and Axel had plenty of that going on in his life. So, against his better judgment, he nodded and said, "Sure, thanks."

Cloud opened the pack and pulled out one for Axel and a clip for himself. "M' trying to quit," he grunted, "So I figure one more for you is one less for me."

Ah, so that explained why he was giving cigarettes out like candy.

After lighting his own, Cloud passed the lighter over to Axel. He'd never smoked before, but he knew how to work a lighter. So he clicked it so that a flame appeared and leaned forward into it, until the end of the cancer stick was right in the flame. Not wanting to cough too bad his first time like everybody seemed to do, he inhaled shallowly. As soon as he felt the sensation of something other than oxygen sliding down his throat, he stopped inhaling and exhaled. It wasn't exactly comfortable, so he did cough a little bit, but a managed to pass it off as a sickly sounding cough and repeated the action.

It was gross. Like it was really, really gross. It tasted like a charcoal briquette (he'd been dared to lick one once) mixed with woody ash. But, slowly he found himself relaxing a little. The breathing became methodical. Breathe, inhale, hold, exhale, breathe, breathe, inhale, exhale, breathe. There wasn't much to it. By the time the cab showed up, there was about a centimeter left of the cigarette before it reached the filter, so Axel figured it would be socially acceptable to put it out on the ground as it was and crush it.

"Thanks for the smoke," said Axel, picking up his backpack and getting into the car. Strange, how he'd managed to find himself in a taxi again; he rarely ever used them. Especially when he had a perfectly good skateboard in the bag tucked between his legs.

"Yuffie sent you, right?" The driver asked sullenly, catching Axel's bloodshot eyes in the rearview mirror.

"Yeah…" he began; now that he thought about it, Yuffie had never told him the address of the church he was supposed to be going to. But thankfully, the driver seemed to know, because he pulled away from the curb with asking anything else of Axel and sped off into the night. Axel didn't even bother paying attention to which direction they were moving, since he knew he was more than half drunk and would just forget anyway. He didn't know or care how he was going to get home tonight, or what Demyx would have to say to him when he did.

Eventually the car pulled up to a stone building with colossal red doors, and stained glass windows that threw off the rapidly decreasing sunlight in an array of deep colors. The chapel was large, and a little wooden cross sat atop, to serve as a beacon for God-seekers all around.

"What's the fare?" Axel asked nervously; he was running short on cash.

"No fare," the driver replied shortly, "prepaid."

Jeez, he'd have to send Yuffie a gift basket or something one of these days, if he could remember.

"Okay, have a good night," said Axel, being careful to not forget his bag as he climbed out of the cab into the chilly unknown.

"Erm…" he muttered to himself. He hadn't been to church since he was a young teenager—since before he came out to his parents. He had feared the Church and the people in it ever since. They'd begun to shun him, and glare with condemning, smoldering eyes.

Then he thought about Roxas. He remembered how he told him that he didn't believe that they were condemned for being homosexual, that every human was a sinner, and that sinners will sin. Hopefully he'd be given that kind of respect here.

There was no sign that said to use a different door, so Axel hesitantly approached the big scary red ones and tried the handle. It opened easily, albeit heavily, for him. The sanctuary inside was enormous, the echo from the door reverberated off the walls loudly, ringing through the empty cathedral in a way that probably could've woken the dead. There was no nun at the front though, like Yuffie said there would be, and nobody came to the front to see who had just noisily entered their building, so Axel just made his way down the corridor of pews and sat in the one at the very front, unsure of what to do next.

_Well, as long as I'm here, I might as well pray,_ he thought to himself. He hadn't prayed in a long time, with the exception of the everyday "Please, God, let the damn CD work this time" or something similar when he was frustrated. This was mostly because he'd taught himself not to believe in God, and regardless whenever he'd prayed prior to that he felt like a faker, like he was just talking to himself. How does one distinguish the difference between God's voice and your own?

But, just for kicks, he bowed his head and closed his eyes, clasping his hands together like he used to do when he was a child.

_Hey, God, _he thought (prayed?) skeptically, _It's been awhile… and I haven't been the best follower. But seriously, can you blame me? Your entire community is always chasing me around, damning me to hell and calling me a sinful faggot—anyway,_ he shook his head, trying to stay on-track and sound more… Christian-y, _I need guidance. I'd explain the situation but well, being God you already know why so… yeah. I love both of them, like to the point where walking away isn't even an option anymore. But I'm so scared of being alone, and I was dumb and dug myself into this stupid hole, and OBVIOUSLY I can't be with both of them; hell, what am I thinking, you don't approve of either of them! I shouldn't have—_

His thoughts (prayers?) were cut short by a loud echoing sound. An altar boy had entered the from a wooden door in the back. He was small, pale, and drowning in his robes. Axel wasn't sure if the kid would be able to point him in the right direction or not.

"Can I help you, sir?" He squeaked in a small voice that matched his age.

"Maybe," Axel replied, "Someone named Yuffie told me to come here. That ring any bells?" He felt a bit self-conscious, because he was still obviously drunk and slurring over his words. He shouldn't be in a place like this in this condition.

"Another Yuffie case?" the boy repeated, more to himself than Axel, "Wait here just a minute."

He disappeared back into the room he'd come out of, and Axel looked back down at his feet, completely unsure of what to expect from this place, and for not the first time, he questioned himself for even coming in the first place. After several minutes, the boy appeared once again, strode past the large set of pipe organs to the other side of room, and pushed a door open and held it for Axel. "Aerith can see you now."

Aerith? Who was Aerith? Was this Yuffie's friend?

He crossed the large room with echoing footsteps and entered the room assigned to him. It was small, and dark, the only light source was streaming in from the other side of a… metal grate? Was he in a confession box? A woman with creamy pale skin and long chocolate brown hair came into view, on the other side of the grate. She smelled like roses, and her eyes were as green as his. She sat down in a chair next to his room and looked inside, though she did not meet his eyes directly. It was then that he realized that with the way the lights were set up, he could see her, but she could not see him.

"My name is Aerith," she said, in a soft, gentle voice that matched her appearance. "Are you comfortable telling me yours?"

Axel's goal, for the moment, was to remain unisex, he didn't trust her enough to believe that gender wasn't going to become an issue.

He tried to make his voice as high pitched as possible without trying to sound shrill or falsetto-y, before saying, "Call me Alex."

"Alex? Okay Alex, can you tell me why you're here?" She must have heard the drunk in his voice, because he hadn't been spoken to like that since Kindergarten.

"Because a hyper barista named Yuffie sent me," he replied honestly.

"Yuffie is sweet," he could hear the smile and admiration in her voice, "but she doesn't yet understand that those who don't seek resolve will never find resolve."

"No no no, you got me all wrong," Axel interjected quickly, "I'm here because I need help, I need a solution."

"Well, I can't help you find a solution of you don't tell me the problem," she said in a singsong voice. It wasn't a mocking one though. Again, she spoke to him as if to reassure a child. Strangely, he found it kind of comforting to be spoken to that way.

"I love two people," he blurted out. There, he'd said it. _Now please, just tell me how to fix it._

"I love many people," she replied simply, egging him on to tell her more.

"I love two people romantically," he confessed, seeing that he wouldn't be able to get out of this that easily, "As in, I'm attracted to them, both physically and emotionally. I'm not married to either of them. I know that I'll have to choose one over the other, and I'm in a pickle here because not only do I _not _want to have to choose, I can't stand the thought of hurting either of them."

She remained silent for a moment. "Alex, are you male or female?" She finally inquired.

"That's not the issue here," he snapped, perhaps a little more harshly than he should have. He was out now anyway, he'd lost his pathetic little voice disguise somewhere along the way.

"It is, because I need to know if you're in love or in lust," she reasoned, "and often, men can't tell the difference. Anyway, I don't think I've ever heard a woman's voice with that much testosterone in it. Tell me Alex, are you gay? You wouldn't be the first Yuffie sent to me. Your lack of willingness to tell me leads me to assume that you are, and that the two you are choosing from are also men. Now, before you get all defensive, I'll tell you that I'm not here to grill you about your sexuality, but I _am _going to tell you that committing a sexual act with another man _is _a sin, as it's made clear in Leviticus, because I'm obligated to say so. However, my telling you to just leave and be straight isn't going to help you at all, is it? So how about I give you the benefit of the doubt and trust that you can have a relationship without having sex?" She winked.

Axel was shocked into silence by her speech. How was it that women were so damn perceptive? He managed to clear his throat and say, "My name in Axel. And I'm _not _in lust. If I were, that wouldn't _really _ be a problem because I'm in an open relationship. Not saying I'd like that outcome any better, because like you, I believe that adultery is a sin, and I'm rather not go down that path. I agreed to it for my lover. But I'm not in lust," gulp, "I want to _be _with this man. I love them both. That's where you come in."

"Thank you for coming clean to me, Axel," said Aerith, her voice not once losing its trancelike composure, "but you already know the solution to this puzzle, don't you? You just don't want to hear the answer."

"I was hoping that you maybe had some kind of loophole for me," he replied lamely.

"I'm assuming that neither knows about the other?" she asked.

"No, not really," he confirmed. "Is there any way for me to come out of this not feeling like a total ass, and completely alone?" he asked desperately.

She hummed in though. "There are a couple of different ways for you to handle this. But whatever you choose, you'll face a very difficult decision. You _must_ tell both of them. To remain silent is to be deceitful, and deceit is a lie. Explain your situation the way you have to me. If you're lucky, _very _lucky, one will accept you, and one will not. But if that does happen, you'll have to live with that choice. Maybe it will seem like the obvious decision at the time, but you must consider what's best for everyone. Consider your future, and with which person it would be more harmonious with. As wrong as it may seem to make it business decision, it may be easier on you that way. Weigh the pros and cons. Consider who cares more for you. The conclusion you come to will not be the conclusion you'll like, and what it may come down to is not choosing and leaving both of them."

"I… I don't know if I can live with that," he confessed.

"Well, I'm also assuming that this isn't an option anyway, but it's my duty as a woman of the church to tell you that a polyamorous relationship is unacceptable, and it's my duty as a human being to tell you that they never work out anyway," she smiled.

"I understand," said Axel solemnly. A relationship with more than one person would go completely against the morale that Axel had carried with him his whole life. "What if it doesn't work?"

"You seem like a very level-headed person to me, Axel," she said serenely, "The way I see it, if the idea of hurting them bothered you so much that you got wasted enough for Yuffie to send you to _me,_ I'd wager at least one of them loves you enough to be willing to try to help you get through it."

"But what if I choose wrong?"

"I'm going to tell you a story that might be able to help, perhaps you've heard it before," said Aerith, "from the book of First Kings. This isn't quite verbatim, feel free to read the whole scripture when you get home," she cleared her throat, "First Kings 3:16: Now two prostitutes came to King Solomon and stood before him. 'My lord!' the first woman cried, 'last night, this woman's son died, because she lay on him, and so, she swapped my living baby with her dead one. At first I woke up in despair, but upon closer inspection it became clear to me that the baby was not the one I bourne.' The other woman argued with her, claiming the living child as her own. And so they quarreled before the king.

But King Solomon was wise, and he said, 'Bring me a sword, and I will cut the baby in two. One woman can have one half, one woman can have the other.'

The woman whose son was alive pleaded, 'No! Please, my lord, do not kill the child, give him to her, please, give him to her!' The king then knew who the true mother was, and he gave his ruling. 'Give the baby to this woman. Do not kill him, she is his mother.'"

"Is there a point to this story?" Axel asked weakly.

"Yes. You are the baby here, Axel. If one is willing to give you up to the other, should that make you happy, then he is probably one that truly loves you, unconditionally. Consider that when you make your decision."

"I understand," said Axel quietly.

"That's all the advice I can give to you, Axel," said Aerith compassionately, "the final decision must be yours."

Axel stood up. "Thank you for your time, and for your guidance," he said, his voice finally beginning to lose its slur, "maybe I'll swing by this Sunday."

"That would be wonderful," she said, the smile clear in her voice, "I hope to see a new face when Sunday does come around."

"See you," said Axel, picking up his bag and getting ready to leave.

"Axel?"

He turned around, "Yes?"

"May God be with you."

Axel wasn't really sure how to respond to that. He'd almost forgotten that he was in a church, and that he was talking to a nun, not a friend. What does an almost atheist say to something like that? He settled on, "Yeah, you too."

* * *

><p>"Axel! Where have you been!" Demyx cried.<p>

It had taken Axel two hours to find his way back home from the church, so it was about six or six-thirty by the time he'd stumbled through the door.

"Was at church," he mumbled incoherently. Technically, it was the truth.

"Bull_shit_ you were at church!" Demyx scolded, _far _too loudly for the likes of his intoxicated brain, "you _reek _of alcohol!"

He pushed past Demyx and collapsed on the couch. "Damn it, Demyx! Yes _I was_ at church! First I went to work, then I went to the falls, you know, the ones up north, and I got you this," he pulled the shimmering rock from his pocket and threw it at his boyfriend's feet, "and then I went to the mall to get this," he pulled the new skateboard out of the bag to wave it around, "and then I went to the bar to get a drink, which turned into two or three and then the crazy bar girl sent me to confession and then I got lost and couldn't find my way home!" Like the great big man he was, he sniffled once or twice and let a traitorous tear escape from his eyes. It was mostly out of frustration, but also out or sorrow, guilt, fear, and everything else he'd been feeling that day.

"So I'm _sorry,"_ he choked out, "my phone is probably broken, because I got chucked in the water, so that's why I didn't answer, if you called."

Demyx, whose eyes had also started to water, bent down to pick the crystal up. The heavy rock left a small dent in the floor when Axel threw it, but Demyx didn't seem to notice. His eyes crinkled up as he smiled at it. He ran to Axel and threw his arms around him.

"It's beautiful Axel, I love it," he whispered, rubbing the redheads heaving back. "I'm sorry for yelling at you after you had such a bad day. Please, please don't cry."

Well, it's not like he was _trying _to.

"You really went to the falls today?" Demyx asked, awestruck.

Axel nodded, "Yeah, and I knew you'd be jealous, and that's why I got you that. It was amazing up there, Dem, it really was. And those crystals, hundreds of them just like that one, were just _sitting there_. I know there isn't really much you can do with one like that besides as like a paper holder or something, but—"

He was cut off when a loud chorus of the song 'I Like My Sitar' so rudely interrupted him; Demyx's phone was ringing.

"I got it," said Demyx, hopping off that couch as if anyone else was going to answer it. He flipped it open, and held it up to his ear. "Hello?... Yep that's me!... Really? Damn that sucks!" he chatted, chewing on his pinky nail. Suddenly his eyes flashed over to Axel, "Huh? What about him?... NU-UH! You're kidding right? How many…? Ten! Are you shitting me? Yeah, yeah, I'll tell him… Yep, see ya, bye." He flipped the phone shut.

"Axel, I have some news for you, and you're not gonna like it. But please, promise me that you're not gonna freak out until after I'm done," said Demyx.

_Oh, fuck, what did he find out? _"Promise."

Demyx walked back over to the couch and sat back down next to Axel.

"Larxene is pregnant."

**Lookie there, I left you with a CLIFFHANGER *troll face* **

**I didn't really have much choice in the matter. I would've extended the chapter longer, BUT I'm a little OCD, and this is the point where the story completely filled up my first notebook. Because, yes, as ridiculous and oldschool as it sounds, I write everything out on paper first, before I type it out. This is mostly because I write this book predominantly in Chemistry class instead of doing work :3 Anyway, the end of this chapter happened to fit PERFECTLY on the very last line, at 150 pages. So you'll take my cliffhangers AND YOU'LL LIKE IT :3**

**Questions, comments, concerns? Leave them to me in a review. I try to reply to every one of them, and if I missed yours, I'm sorry, it wasn't intentional.**

**~KingdomFlameVIII**


	7. Photo?

**Hey hey hey, my beautiful readers. I have yet another excuse for my late update. Yep, this time it's because my internet has been down for the last few days, so, obviously there was no way for me to put this up.**

**Shout out to an anonymous reviewer who refers to him/herself as **_**M **_**(Death Note reference?), who left me a very extensive and thorough review! Your criticism was greatly appreciated, and I double checked this chapter for errors. Also, about what you said about my contradicting myself, I'm not sure specifically what you're talking about, but inner conflicts aren't exactly my strong point. I'm sorry if anything I said confused you, and if you spot it again in this chapter, please, please inform me so I can correct it.**

**It was also brought to my attention that the "real world" element in this story isn't exactly up to par. While that wasn't supposed to be crucial to the story (you'll find out why very, very soon) it should not be ignored. That being said, I'm considering rewriting a version in which the characters are still in school, since that's all I know, and Leon being their professor in digital photography or something. I'd leave this version up of course, but please tell me your opinions on this, since it's all for you, the reader.**

**Also, one more thing, ("KingdomFlameVIII, you're rambling! D:" Sorry!) if the characters in this story were given a name change and appearance alterations, is it potentially publishable? I should probably ask this later because I have crazy shit in store for you, but I'd just really like to know your opinions. I aspire to write and publish at least one book, could this be it? Let me know please please!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to Kingdom Hearts, Square Enix, or Disney. Not even Axel. Seriously, I'd be cool JUST owning Axel. And Riku. And Zexion. Actually, could I just take Organization XIII to go, please? Except Vexen, they can keep him.**

"What the _hell _do you mean, 'Larxene is pregnant!'" Axel demanded, grabbing Demyx by the shoulders in fear. _No. This cannot be happening. This is what I get for being a vile, dirty, rotten little cheater. But—fuck! I can't be a father. I just can't!_

Demyx threw his hands up in the air. "I _mean_ that there is a little embryo spawning in her uterus. And by embryo, I mean _baby_," he exasperatedly, "I mean, jeez, I know you don't like girls and all, but didn't you ever take Sex Ed in high school?"

"That's not what I meant," Axel growled.

"Oh," said Demyx shortly, catching on to Axel's disbelief, "Well, if it makes you feel any better, there's only _approximately_ a one in ten chance that it's yours. That's what she told me over the phone anyways, apparently she doesn't actually _know_ who most of them are so…"

Axel hid his face in his hands and groaned. This really wasn't the type of thing he needed to come home to, especially not drunk, frustrated, and trying to tell Demyx he was cheating on him. No sir, he was having enough trouble with blue-eyed blondes as it was. Or did Larxene have green eyes? He didn't know or care. What struck him the most was how cavalier Demyx was being about the whole pregnancy thing. Didn't it bother him at _all_ that Axel possibly could've impregnated some girl they barely knew? A girl! He didn't even _like _girls.

The whole 'girls are icky' ideology that took over every elementary school boy's mind had never really left him. Women were loud, and annoying, and they squealed over _everything_, then later they developed _growths _on their _chests _that spit out milk and _they bled from the orifice! _EW.

This was not to say that every woman was a disgusting nutcase, Axel was more mature that _that._ He'd met several girls just that week, that _day_ who were intelligent, kind, and not shallow in the slightest. But the thought of having to spend extensive amounts of time around one like Larxene, who shamelessly flaunted every unsatisfying womanly trait, made Axel sick to his stomach. And she was a _slut, _no less. From the impression he'd got from her the morning they'd met, one night stands were not that uncommon for her. Really, did she never have a father? Behind the blatant disgust he felt for her, he couldn't honestly say he didn't feel a bit sorry for her. She was violent, and she was mean, and she had a pathological need for attention.

What made her that way? He knew better than to assume that _just _her gender was to blame. So what was? What sort of past did she carry on her shoulders? Was she ignored as a child, maybe? Abused? What sort of family was she from? Or perhaps it was the opposite. Perhaps her parents kept her in such a sheltered environment that she felt the need to lash out to the extremes. To, as many put it, 'live her own life,' just as a big 'fuck you' to the folks. What would she do now, that everything she knew was about to change?

"Axel? Are you okay?" Demyx asked. He sounded so concerned…

He was not okay. This last bit of shit on top of the pile that was his life was the very last bit he could handle. He felt like he was going to go crazy, or fall onto the floor and die. Or both. And what was worse? He couldn't even bring himself to _tell _Demyx about half the things that were stressing him out. He was _supposed to,_ of course, but he couldn't. Cowardice had gotten the best of him. He found himself shaking his head, regardless of the front he was supposed to be putting up for his boyfriend.

"No," he said miserably, his shoulders heaving and his voice becoming thick, "I'm not okay…"

_Nothing _was okay. He was virtually unemployed, his entire love life was going to complete shit, and to top that off, he may be forced by nature to choose someone he could never love. Maybe she deserved love, but he wouldn't ever be able to care for her like he should. Meanwhile, the one his heart truly belonged to (whose identity he still wasn't sure of) would be far beyond his reach.

"Sit down, Axel, before you fall," said Demyx softly, trying to ease Axel's shaking form onto the couch.

"No, no, let me up, let me up!" Axel shouted, flailing his arms. Thankfully, Demyx got the message and let him go, just in time for him to make it to the bathroom and vomit noisily into the toilet. Were anyone to question him, he'd try to blame the sudden action on all the alcohol he'd consumed, but in his head he knew that wasn't the case. Who knew that the fiery, confident Axel was really such a pansy?

Demyx appeared behind him within seconds, gingerly reaching around his head to take the clumps of hair that framed his face and hold them back. "I told you, you were sick," he scolded, "you shouldn't have gone in today."

Axel opened his mouth to argue and say that no, he was not ill, and even if he were, they needed the money anyway, but before he could get a word out, he was met with another mouthful of sick. Fuck, it was disgusting. When he was sure it was all out he sucked up the residue and spat the rest of the vile substance in the toilet.

"I'm not sick," he said, sniffling and shaking his head, "I'm upset. I can't be a _father,_ when I can't even take care of myself! _I'm _still a kid." He moved away from the porcelain bowl and sat in a fetal position against the wall. Neither of them had turned the light on upon entering the room, so it was dimly lit only by the overhead light in the kitchen. Demyx moved over to join him.

"Hey, hey, shush," he said, placing a kiss atop Axel's head, "You're being silly. You do take care of yourself. There's nothing to worry about until there's something to worry about, okay? Stressing about it today isn't going to affect the outcome of tomorrow. What's gonna happen is gonna happen, regardless of what you do about it. There _is _nothing you can do but accept that and try to work with what ya got."

Axel swallowed. "But Demyx, you work two jobs. Hollow Bastion's industrious, without _Poir, _I'm not gonna be able to find work, unless we go somewhere crazy like Radiant Gardens where all the real designers are at. And even then, what? I have no experience other than that of a private company. I'm mediocre, how am I supposed to pay child support?"

"Maybe she won't ask you to," said Demyx, shrugging his shoulders, "And it's still just a one in ten chance, possibly _more._"

"But if that were the case, she wouldn't be tracking down all of the possible fathers" Axel pointed out.

He seemed to have made his point to Demyx, because the man remained silent for a few minutes. "She wants you to go to the hospital with the rest of the guys next Sunday," he said, his tone becoming increasingly gentler with each word, "I can take off work and come with you, if you like. Sundays are usually slow days anyway…"

"It's okay," Axel mumbled, wiping his mouth, "It probably wouldn't make her feel any better if she found out one of her possible baby-daddies was actually gay and in a relationship."

"Oh, she knows," Demyx responded in a matter-of-fact tone, "We chatted for a while that night at the club, that's how she got my number. Marluxia introduced us, remember? They made a bet to see if she could get into your flaming homosexual hot-pants… You really don't remember?"

Axel shook his head slowly, "All I remember is going to the club with you, then waking up in her apartment. It was really awkward; she had to introduce herself to me…" He hung his head in shame.

"Huh… wow, now I feel pretty guilty," said Demyx, shaking his head sadly, "I shouldn't have let you get so shitfaced. Or I should've at least babysat you."

Axel was in awe. He was the one wronging his lover in so many ways, yet _he _was the one feeling guilty? _He's too good for me, _Axel concluded, _That has to be it. He's way too good for me and a low bastard such as myself doesn't deserve him. _After a few more different wordings of the same "I don't deserve him," _How can I not be happy just with him? His soul is more beautiful than mine will ever be._

"I'm the one who broke the rules," he said somberly. What Demyx still didn't know was that he'd broken more of their ground relationship rules than one. In fact, it was the _only _other one. Rule number one: No sleeping with women. Rule number two: no falling in love. At the time Axel had just laughed at them, assuming he'd never even have to worry about it. Oh, how wrong he'd been.

"Screw the rules, Axe, I just want you to be happy," said Demyx. "Shit happens, and ya never know what life'll toss at ya. So we should just enjoy ourselves while we can, right? 'Cause who knows what tomorrow will dump on you."

_Yeah, ain't that the truth. _"I wish I was strong as you, Dem," he said honestly, putting his head between his legs and begging the room to just please, please stop spinning.

He felt a cool hand brushing over his forehead, easing, comforting. "Shh, you're so brave, Axel," Demyx whispered soothingly, "Everything's gonna be okay. We'll get through it, okay?"

Axel nodded, somewhat for Demyx's sake and somewhat for his own. It was foolish to believe that this speed bump in his life would never pass, because it would, and no matter what the outcome was, _eventually_ he would definitely have to get over it. Time does that to you. He knew that. He told himself that, over and over again. But convincing himself to believe it for the time being, that was a different matter entirely.

* * *

><p>"Guys, I'm back," Roxas called lightly as he stepped through the door of his apartment. It was still light out, and his cheeks were still flushed from the cold, his fingers still numb, and his heart still beating at a dangerous pace at the thought of the forbidden rendezvous between himself and Axel.<p>

"We're in here!" called Hayner from the living room. Roxas took his time shuffling out of his boots and coat, carefully retrieving from the pockets every crystal he'd collected for them. Before he entered the living room, he fixed himself a steamy mug of hot chocolate (extra marshmallows) to warm himself up.

"You would never guess where I went today," he said casually as he entered the room. He sat himself down next to Naminé on the loveseat.

"Ooh, tell us," said Olette interestedly, leaning forward to rest her elbows on her knees.

Roxas extended his previously closed fist out for everyone to see, and opened it to reveal the gleaming gemstones, eliciting several 'oohs' and 'ahs,' especially from the girls.

"The Rising Falls," he said dramatically, setting them on the coffee table in front of each of them, with the exception of Xion, who seemed to be absent from the scene. "These things were just _lying around _up there. And there were bigger ones too! A—" he began to say Axel, but an alarm in his head told him no, leave Axel out of this, "Marluxia picked up one the size of a golf ball! It was ridiculous—"

"Wait," Pence interrupted, "When you say the rising falls, do you mean the _actual _rising falls of Hollow Bastion? One of the seven legendary wonders of the worlds? They actually exist? I know Pride Rock does but the falls!"

"Huh? 'Course they do! Oh, right, forgot you don't live here," said Roxas, playful bonking himself on the head for forgetting such a silly detail, "Yeah, they're real. And they're _amazing_. Seriously guys, it was unbelievable. So beautiful…"

"Did you get any pictures for us?" Naminé asked hopefully.

"Actually, I did," he replied, only just remembering as she brought it up.

He went back into the kitchen and dug through his backpack, which lie on the kitchen counter, to retrieve his Terry and his point and shoot. Picking up the bag, he noticed that it felt a little lighter than usual. Had someone been going through his stuff? Nothing seemed out of the ordinary. After he'd found both cameras, he just shrugged it off and started flicking through the digital photos he'd taken of the place, deleting the, as he deemed them, 'bad shots' as he went. When he came to the end of the collection, he went back into the living room, taking his bag and both cameras with him, and passed Terry around so that everyone could see.

While they were all in an uproar over the beauty of the crystal lake, Roxas picked up his brownie. That seemed lighter too. What was going on? He opened it to find with a shock that there was no film inside. _Huh! That's so odd, I could swear I put film in it this morning. Maybe I left it on the table in the art room? Or in the bag? _He rummaged quickly through the knapsack, finding none.

He stood up. "I'll be right back, guys," he assured them as he left the living room and made his way down the darkened hallway. When he opened the door to the studio the first thing he noticed that they were gone. All of them, every single precious photo on his clothesline was missing. There were none hanging, nor were they set down on the table. There wasn't a hint of the glossy paper anywhere, or any canisters of undeveloped film for that matter.

"Guys!" Roxas called towards the room he'd come from, "Have any of you been in my stuff? All my photos are gone!"

"_What's gone_?" Naminé called back.

"My photos. The photos are missing!" He repeated.

…

"_What!"_

Roxas growled in frustration and aggressively hurried back into the living room. "All my stuff is gone. My film, the photos, everything."

Blank looks all around.

"What's with you guys?" he demanded angrily.

"Roxas, are you trying to say—" Olette began, but didn't finish. Or rather, she did finish, but she seemed to have trouble getting out the last word. Her mouth moved, but nothing came out.

"You're doing it too, Ollie!" Hayner exclaimed, jumping up off the couch.

Olette folded her arms, "I am not, I heard myself clearly," she argued crossly, pouting at them.

"Where's Xion?" Roxas inquired abruptly, ignoring the peculiar dilemma Olette and Hayner were having. Maybe Xion had taken his pictures?

"She's gone to visit some old friends," said Hayner quickly and dismissively, "But Roxas! Don't you see? We can't use the word—! See, I heard myself, but judging by all of your shocked expressions, I'd say I'm the only one that did."

He was exactly right. It was just the same as it had been with Olette. His lips moved, forming the word that Roxas realized must have been 'photo,' because that's what he'd been trying to ask them about before. But not a sound escaped Hayner's lips.

"Wait, this is ridiculous," said Pence, "Are you guys trying to pull some kind of gag on me or something? People can steal sure, but not words!"

"Actually, I was kind of thinking the same thing," said Roxas crossly, folding his arms like Olette, "especially since I can hear myself. How am I supposed to know that this isn't just you guys pulling a practical joke, and Xion's not gonna jump out of the closet in thirty seconds and say, "here's your stuff, Roxy, ha ha!"

Hayner scoffed, then put his hand to his throat and said, or mouthed, 'photo.'

"Yep, just as I thought," he said smugly to himself.

He stood up, walked over to the mouth of the hallway that led from the living room to the studio, where Roxas was leaned up against the wall. When he reached him he did something very strange. He took Roxas by the wrist and forced the palm of his hand to touch the base of his throat.

"Feel it? When I talk?" Hayner asked, "Humans have voice boxes, remember?" Indeed, with every word, Roxas could feel the shallow vibrations from Hayner's vocal cords against his hands. "Now, I'm going to mouth the word we all know is gone," he continued, mouthing the word for Roxas to clearly see. Nothing. "Now I'm actually going to say it." He moved his lips in the exact way as he had before, except this time Roxas could feel the syllables traveling through the young man's larynx, "Can't fake that."

Roxas removed his hand, convinced, and slid down the wall. _Impossible! _He thought repeatedly. It's not like the universe, or any human, could suddenly decide to not let anybody use a word! That shit just doesn't happen! Unless God suddenly decided He was sick of pottymouths down here, but even then, photo wasn't a dirty word. And that aside, Roxas was sure that God kept some kind of code for Himself against doing such things. It would cause massive panic worldwide!

"Wait, so you're trying to tell me that for no reason at all, suddenly we're not physically allowed to say photo?" Roxas asked incredulously, knowing that everyone understood what he was asking, even if they couldn't hear him say it.

"It would seem so, yes," said Olette gravely.

Roxas watched as they all experimentally mouthed the word photo, each trying to say it. He heard nothing. What did one do when thrown into a situation like this? He knew by his rapidly increasing heartbeat that he was nearing a state of panic, but rationally, he knew this really wasn't panic material. It's not like it was particularly dangerous for words to suddenly go missing, unless large chunks of the common language disappeared. But even then, there was always sign language. Still, it was pretty scary shit when a pending threat of losing the ability to communicate lingered over you.

"_Why?_" he asked miserably, completely at a loss for what to say or do.

"How about we turn on the news?" Pence suggested, "Just to see if anybody else has noticed this, or is even having this problem. For all we know, we could just be going crazy from some obscure, radioactive chemical in those rocks you gave us."

Roxas chuckled nervously, like one of those 'fill the awkward silence' laughs that weren't really sincere, but were needed in order to relieve some of the tension, even if said tension was only in the atmosphere of one's own mind.

Naminé, who was sitting closest to the television, didn't even bother searching for the remote. Instead she simply stood up and turned it on manually. It was already on the news channel, from when Roxas had been watching before Leon called him into work. He was an early riser, something none of his companions would never understand about him. The TV turned on to a news story, and then another after that, and another after that. Armed robbery, in which the criminal was caught and being put on trial; yet another missing person, added to the ever-growing list; and eye contacts that would allow the wearer to read their emails. When the news channel got to the point of talking about lazy email-reading contacts, it became safe to say that the media had not received any word (or lack thereof) on the mysterious phenomenon.

While the rest of his friends were concentrating on the TV, Roxas studied Naminé. She didn't look any different than she always did; clad in her favorite color, white. She was tiny, like a pixie, soft, fragile and beautiful. Nothing about her had changed, but Roxas felt different, _something_ was missing, and he couldn't put his finger on it.

Perhaps in reality, it was only he himself that had changed. People changed all the time, didn't they? This was something beyond his control, surely he couldn't be blamed for it, right? Sometimes you don't need a reason or explanation, because sometimes there just isn't one. Roxas could admit that he found some comfort in that. His only problem, really, would be telling Naminé. How do you tell a girl that you don't love her anymore? Sure, she was nice to look at, and a very kind person, but had he ever really seen anything more in her? Just considering that made him feel like a shallow asshole, but he preferred honesty, even if it were only with himself and the truth did hurt.

"Hey, Hayner?"

Hayner turned around at the sound of his name to face Roxas. "Yeah, what is it?"

"Can I talk to you about something? Just us?" he asked his friend, giving him a hopeful look.

Hayner, along with everyone else, looked thoroughly confused, but he shrugged his shoulders anyway and nodded shortly. "Sure, lead the way."

Roxas would've preferred to talk to Hayner, Pence, and Olette all together, but obviously that would have been way too suspicious. He chose to ask Hayner for advice mainly because they themselves had a romantic past, and also because Olette couldn't be trusted not to spill the beans to her fellow woman. And as for Pence, he was much better at diffusing arguments, as opposed to potentially starting them.

After shutting the door to his and Naminé's room behind him, he and Hayner sat down on the bed.

"What's up?" Hayner asked casually, leaning backwards and propping himself up on one elbow, "besides the whole freakish 'we can't talk anymore' thing?"

"Ummm…" how was one supposed to say this? "You remember Axel? Yeah I like him. You know, like, more than I _should,_ since the position of significant other in my life is currently taken…"

Hayner's first reaction, of course, was to burst out laughing. "Pah! I knew it!" he struggled to say, "Awe, wittle Woxy's got a cwush!"

"Shut up," Roxas mumbled, unable to come up with a better response, "That isn't helping."

He waited patiently for Hayner to get over his fit of giggles before continuing. "I mean, it's not the end of the world that I'm getting over Nam, we all knew it was gonna happen eventually." Hayner nodded in agreement, "What I'm really concerned about is breaking it to her that I'm totally gay for this model that I _just met,_ as opposed to _her, _who I've known since what? Seventh grade?"

"I dunno, it's your choice, man," said Hayner, "Sometimes you're allowed to make selfish decisions. If you're not happy, she's not gonna be happy, and it's gonna be tense and awkward. But before you go jumping all over that, does _he _like _you?_ Because if he doesn't, breaking up with her now would kind of be an epic waste of a civil relationship slash live-in housewife. No offense, but that's kind of what she is."

"Heh, none taken. But yeah, he does. He, uhh, admitted it to me today…" said Roxas, shifting uncomfortable and looking in every possible direction that wasn't Hayner.

"Oh?"

"And we made out," he finished miserably.

Hayner scrunched up his face as though in pain and made a noise that Roxas could only describe as 'sucking in a hissy breath,' as if to say 'tsk tsk Roxas, that's a foul.' "Youch," he scolded, "That's low, mate."

"Sorry," Roxas said quietly, defeated. Hayner sat up properly and thumped him on the back.

"Awe c'mon! You're only human. Just come clean to her. It can't be _that _bad," said Hayner, smiling reassuringly.

"But she's a _woman," _Roxas moaned, "I mean, don't they like, flip out and morph into weird, crazy little creatures when you tell them things like this? I've seen the movies dude, next they go around and like, scratch and gnash their teeth—"

Hayner snorted. "Don't be stupid, that only happens in high school," he said, scoffing, "Besides, this is Naminé you're talking about. The worst you'll get from her is a tear or two."

"Gee, that makes me feel loads better," said Roxas, "But can I like, not make her cry? I really don't want to hurt her feelings. Isn't there a way to go about this without sounding like a total dick? Because honestly, that's really what's bothering me."

"I don't know," said Hayner, lazily falling back down to lay spread eagled on the bed. "Maybe you should first get the conversation, or your lives, past the whole 'not together anymore' thing before you bring up the Axel thing. So that it doesn't seem so much like you're leaving her for someone else. Even if that is what you're doing, it's just the nicer thing to do… or the safer thing, since you're trying to cover your ass. But really, I think you're making a bigger deal out of this than you need to. It's not like you two will lose anything but a title."

"I just hope she sees it that way…"

"She'll be cool, you worry too much," said Hayner confidently, "At least in the end, you'll still have Axel."

"Hayner?"

"Hmm?"

"Thanks."

Hayner punched him in the shoulder lightly and embraced him in a manly type one-armed hug, "Hey, that's what friends are for, right?"

Roxas nodded. "Also Hayner?"

"Sup?"

"You should ask out Olette."

Hayner blanched. "W-what?"

Roxas shrugged at the reaction. He'd been expecting this. "You heard me," he said nonchalantly, "I _know _you like her. _Everyone _knows. Even she does, and she likes you too, you're just too dense to see it. She's been trying to tell you for _years _dude. I'm talking high school days. Freshman days."

Hayner's entire face brightened. "Really? How come you guys never told me?"

"We were waiting for you to figure it out on your own," Roxas laughed.

He was truly fortunate to have Hayner. How many people can you be friends with, then date, then break up with, and end up being just as good, if not better, friends than before? How many people could you give your entire trust and confidence to, because they'd already seen and heard it all from you? Roxas really missed having him around for that, just to talk to, and say all the things that he couldn't say around anyone else. He was also happy that he, for once, could play matchmaker/therapist for Hayner, instead of it being the other way around.

His best friend smiled at him like he'd just told him summer vacation had come early, "I guess I'm not so good with that kind of stuff," he admitted, smiling sheepishly, "Do you really think she likes me? But she's all like, smart, and pretty and girly and I'm all—not smart."

"Beautiful worded. Don't worry, it's endearing," Roxas assured him, "And yeah, she definitely does. She told me and Pence once, and she used to squeal over how hot you looked whenever you kicked Seifer's ass during the Struggle Championships."

Hayner looked very pleased with himself, "Yeah? I'll have to start doing those again…"

There was a short silence, in which both men sighed contentedly, each simply enjoying the company of the other.

"Listen to us, being mature," said Hayner, "Our parents always said that eventually we'd grow up, and it's really weird to actually be there. Eventually seemed like so far away, and I didn't even realize until now that we made it there. We'll have to thank those girls, Roxy, they made men out of us."

"Do you ever miss the old days?" Roxas asked suddenly.

"All the time," said Hayner nodding, "But we got tomorrow to worry about! Y'know? Live for today and all that jazz. But one thing, _never _let me say y'know again, I sounded way too much like Rai right there."

"Okay," Roxas agreed. "I know what you mean though. Life goes by and suddenly all you have left of the past is an old, washed out photograph."

Hayner jumped up and exclaimed, "Roxas, you just said photo!"

"So did you!" he replied upon hearing the word. "Let's go tell the others! Man, was that weird or what?"

Hayner already had his head and shoulders out the door. "Guys, the word is back! See, listen! Photo photo photo!"

This roused a chorus of several triumphant exclamations of 'photo' from everyone waiting in the living room.

"If any outsider was to walk in and see us, they would totally think we were crazy," Pence pointed out, laughing out loud at the commotion.

As soon as Roxas and Hayner made it back into the living room, their attention, as well as everyone else's, was shifted towards the doorway into the kitchen at the sound of another person entering the apartment. Within seconds, Xion was standing in the archway, completely oblivious to the odd happenings the rest of them had been experiencing only moments ago.

"Hey guys! What'd I miss?" She asked, looking like a happy puppy. Everyone swapped gazes and it was quickly decided that they should _not _say anything to the girl.

"You wouldn't believe us if we told you, Xi," said Naminé, shaking her head sadly and giggling at her friend's horrible timing.

"What! Tell meeeeee!" She commanded, looking wildly around the room for something that might give her hint. Obviously she couldn't find anything, as the problem they'd been facing wasn't exactly tangible.

Olette tried intervening next, before they lost control of Xion. "Just—never mind, Xi. We didn't do much, Roxas was just telling us about how he went to the Rising Falls today, and he was having trouble with his camera when we wanted to see the photos—"

There it was, the word. She said it, just to flaunt the fact that she could, and everyone in the room, save for Xion, shared a secret smile.

"What! You went to the _falls! _Without _me!_" Roxas couldn't tell whether the anger in her voice was sincere or not, but he didn't want to risk getting slapped. So he briskly trotted over to the coffee table, which held all of their crystals, and he plucked one from the pile and raised it high for her see.

"Yeah, and look what I brought for you!" He said with forced cheer. Diamonds were a girl's best friend, right? Not that these things were diamonds, at least he didn't think so, but the way Xion smiled assured him that it didn't matter one bit.

"Ooh! It's shiny! Gimme!" she cried, flinging herself towards Roxas and the gift he had for her at top speed. When she reached him, she took the little stone from him, examined it, then threw her arms around him and squealed right in his ear, "It's beautiful Roxas, thank you!"

Roxas pretended to stick his finger in his ear and wiggle it around. "Hey guys, do you think it's physically possible for her to speak _without _reaching maximum volume every time?"

"Of course I can," she responded serenely, "But!" Maximum volume again, "Where would the fun in that be! Do you know how powerful these vocal cords are?" She proceeded to sing a note so loudly and so high pitched Roxas was sure his ear drum had split, along with a mirror somewhere nearby.

"What the _hell _was that!" Hayner exclaimed, clutching his ears.

"That was a b-flat," Xion responded cheerfully.

Everyone rolled their eyes at that.

"Hey guys look! It's snowing!" said Naminé excitedly, pointing towards the window. Indeed, the little white crystals were falling in graceful clumps just outside the window. Everyone (particularly Twilight Town natives, who had never seen snow) rushed to the window to watch for a moment in awe.

This last bit of excitement was the last that Roxas felt like dealing with for the day, being the inclusive guy that he was. So he took the first opportunity he could to sit down on the loveseat with Naminé and suggest they all do something quiet, like watch a movie. They still had a good week or so left to stay, so it was agreed that this was an acceptable evening to just take a breather.

They decided on what to watch and what kind of pizza to order without much input on Roxas' part. He chose to confine himself to his own little bubble of Roxas-land, on the small couch that Naminé had picked out herself, and craftily placed right next to the heater. Roxas didn't bother the rest of them, and for the most part, surprisingly, nobody bothered him. He felt a little guilty, since they came mainly to see him. Aside from the first day they came, he hadn't spent much time with them at all… he spent it with Axel. True, he had work as an excuse today, but it felt more like a field trip than anything else.

But Hayner already knew that he needed time to think things through, and Olette had these crazy weird female sensors that apparently told her now wasn't the time to be talking to him. Aside from Xion's never ending list of probing questions about the falls, and his life in general, Roxas was pretty much left alone to his thoughts.

About halfway through the movie, he experimentally slipped his arm around Naminé's waist, just to see how she would respond, _if _she would respond, to see if there was any hope for a romantic relationship. Not that Roxas was big on sex in any way, but come on. Sometimes a guy just needed to be touched.

Roxas wasn't looking to compare the two or anything, but Axel liked to touch. Not _extensively,_ but he did little things like brush their hands together while they were walking, pat him on the shoulder, ruffle his hair, and, this one seemingly being his personal favorite, cuddling to keep warm.

Now Roxas wasn't gonna say that he was a very physical kind of guy, but admittedly, he _really _liked the little things like that. Maybe it was just Axel's hands in general that he liked; they were bigger than his own, dry, and very warm. Their fingers fit together perfectly.

Naminé didn't move. She didn't lean into him, but she didn't flinch away either. Not even a shift in position to acknowledge the fact that she was being held. She kept her eyes glued to the T.V. screen as if nothing had changed. Guess that answered his question.

He didn't blame her, particularly, nor did he resent her. Their relationship had always been strictly neutral, and he'd never expected any more… or less. Did he really _need _to break up with her? Nothing would change, really, if he didn't. They didn't hold hands in public, or by themselves. They didn't go on dates, they didn't say sweet things to one another. They just... coexisted. And it was a harmonious existence. Could he really be blamed for not wanting to offset that balance?

Of course he _could._ It was like living a lie, and lying was wrong. But given the choice, he would live that way. Clinging to her was kind of like clinging to his identity, because he'd "loved" her for so long. Somewhere in his heart he knew he still did, in a way. But it was normal for people to not forget their first love, especially so short a time after falling out of love, right? He thought so. There would always be a place in his heart for her. But the rest of it, well, he wanted to give it to Axel, and he wanted everyone to know it. So where did that leave him? Conflicted as fuck. Decisions, decisions.

_I'll ask Cloud what to do_, he decided. _He's the one that lives with us. After getting his input, I'll discuss it with Axel. After all, it is our relationship. _That, and even after Axel's confession, it was _still _like an unspoken secret! They still tiptoes around the subject. It was _there, _and now they both knew for sure that it was there, but what they were going to do about it was still in the gray. And Roxas, he needed things in black in white.

He slept on the couch that night.

**What's this? Are Roxas and the others going crazy? Stay tuned to find out! **

**My apologies for such a short chapter, hopefully the next one will be longer.**

**Coming up next! Is Axel the father of Larxene's child? What happened to his parents? Will hel get up the courage to tell Demyx about Roxas? Find out in Chapter Eight!**

***self-promotion over* **


	8. Trainwreck

**Hi! I hope you're all well! I've been neglecting you again… it's been like, a month since I've updated :/ and we're just getting to the good part! I'd use the development of my oneshot (which turned into like, a fiveshot xD) as an excuse for my absence, but unfortunately I've been neglecting that one too. Sorry, I know I left y'all with a cliffy and everything. **

**The good news is, now I'm like, five chapters ahead again. I think I've said this before, I like to write things out (my major projects, at least) before I type them. I was in danger of catching up with myself for a while, but now I've got a good eighty pages or so between here and my notebook (thumbs up!**

**ALSO. This might seem déjà vu to some of you, but have you seen the new "Special Trailer" for KH3D! Same thing goes for last time; if you haven't, exit this page and go there. This will still be here when you're done watching, I promise. There's the most adorable AkuRoku moment in there, and I was literally screaming my head off throughout the entire thing. I have proof; I taped my original reaction for my friend's entertainment xD. ANYWAY, sorry, I'm sure you didn't come here to read my silly updates.**

**Disclaimer: I **_**will**_** own KH… someday… *cries***

Roxas didn't get a chance to call Axel again until after Hayner, Pence, and Olette were on a train back to Twilight Town. Xion had opted to stay behind for a few more days, since she had more friends in Hollow Bastion than anyone else in the gang. She and Roxas had parted ways, on the promise that they would see each other again at some point before she had to leave.

The opportunity to discuss his situation with Cloud had not arisen until Sunday, when Naminé took her weekly shopping trip to the grocery store. When Roxas finally got up the courage to approach Cloud, he turned out to be of no help at all anyway.

"Psh, I knew it," he'd sniggered when Roxas had first explained the issue to him. He hadn't even turned his attention away from the video game he was playing.

"I'm serious, Cloud!" Roxas had groaned, his face stuffed into a pillow, "You gotta help me, I don't know what to do!"

Cloud's tone had softened, just a little, when he'd replied; heart-to-heart chats were never exactly his strong point. "I'm sorry, kid; I don't know what to tell you. I don't have any more experience with—err—boys, than you do. Now I like your girl, I do, but to me it doesn't matter whether she's here or not. If you want to go out and bang models, it makes no difference to me. Though having meals cooked for you and laundry done is kind of nice..."

Roxas had left him alone then, sensing he'd get no more help from his brother. He'd chosen then to call Axel, to either talk or set up a meeting place, before Naminé could get home.

Which is how he ended up sitting on a bench on the corner of 5th and Market Street, with handwritten directions in one hand and his cellphone in the other. It had been decided that he would go to Axel's place to hang out, but the real trouble was getting there. He'd made it to the right street, sure, but the slightly eccentric redhead had forgotten to tell him whether to go right or left at the intersection. He'd tried to replay Axel's directions in his head to try and figure out if there was something he'd missed:

"_You gotta take Broadway North until you get near Main Street, but don't take that, because it gets crowded as fuck and traffic sucks. Instead, take South... uh, I wanna say 3rd? Take that until it intersects Rt. 48 and you can take a left there and after you pass the big fountain you should, __**should **__see Market. Or, if you got a car, you can follow South Main to Rt. 48 to Main Street..."_

Roxas had simply given up and shushed him then, since all he needed to know was which street he had to take after Market, since he already knew where that was and he didn't have a car. Axel then told him that the apartment building he lived in was a couple of buildings down from the corner of 5th and Market. Except it was a four-way intersection, and all of the buildings looked the same. There was a pretty sketchy-looking café on one corner, but Roxas honestly was afraid to go in there to ask for directions, and plus even if he did, what would they have been able to tell him? He was looking for a building, not a street. So, there was nothing left to do really but send Axel a text asking which way to go.

After several minutes passed, Roxas was still on the bench and getting extremely irritated with Axel for not replying when he saw a familiar mane of messy red hair bouncing up and down as Axel jogged in his direction. Admittedly he looked pretty adorable; he wore no coat but he was sporting scarlet earmuffs, which even his bright red hair couldn't disguise, and black galoshes with flames going up the sides.

"You couldn't have just told me where to go?" Roxas asked amusedly when Axel finally reached him, huffing and puffing.

"I figured it would just be easier if I showed you," said Axel brightly, sweeping him into a hug. It was a little awkward, because he was so short, and they were in a public place, but after a second or two of being wrapped in Axel's warmth, he found he didn't mind so much. He thought he might just melt inside when the redhead flashed him that crooked, dorky smile that he loved so much.

Roxas soon found out that the walk to the building in which Axel lived _would _have taken about a minute or so, but as it turned out, Axel _loved _the snow. He made a task of stepping in it, stomping in it, and throwing it at Roxas whenever possible, initiating a full blown snowball fight between the two men, right on the city streets. Given they didn't really have much snow to work with, the fight didn't last long, but regardless, they were both dampened by the time Axel forfeited and opted to go inside.

_It should be a crime to look that good_, Roxas thought to himself as he watched Axel walk towards him in long, confident strides. The fabric of his clothing, now wet, clung to his masculine body perfectly. He looked so hot, Roxas fancied the thought of that water evaporating right off of him. _Wait, no! Remember, you have a task! _He firmly told himself as Axel took him by the hand and let him into the building.

As they made their way up the stairs (the elevator, apparently, was broken) Roxas began suddenly to feel very uncomfortable. Axel was being as casual as can be, mindlessly chattering about something or another, but Roxas still felt like this was so... forbidden. He felt slutty, like Axel was leading him up to his room to steal his virginity or something. Oh, God, he wasn't ready for that! Though his mind said so, his body shivered when the thought crossed his mind of those hands on him. So warm... _No, focus!_

"Just drop your coat anywhere," said Axel lightly, as if there was nothing out of the ordinary about showing a potential boyfriend where he lived. Maybe it really _wasn't _anything out of the ordinary. Maybe Roxas was just paranoid.

There was a round little breakfast table in the corner of the cramped room with two rickety-looking chairs tucked underneath it. Roxas took his jacket off and draped it over one of them.

"I'm gonna make a sandwich," said Axel, sounding a wee bit distracted, "You want one?"

Roxas shook his head. What the hell, why was he so nervous? It's not like he'd never hung out with Axel alone before. He sat down awkwardly on the couch, the way one always did when visiting a new place when they were still unsure of boundaries, where they were and weren't allowed to go. He tried not to look bored, because truthfully he wasn't, and that aside he didn't like making people feel like they had to entertain him.

When he couldn't help it anymore, he took a deep breath, and started blurting out all that was on his chest, "A-Axel, we should talk. I mean, uhh-I had something I wanted to ask you about. You know, 'cause I'm like, I guess at a loss for what I should do abou—"

Before he could even finish his babbling sentence, Axel was on him, and so were his lips, and all of the little thoughts and troubles that had been bothering Roxas temporarily slipped away. He didn't even put a second thought into returning the kiss; in fact he was probably putting more enthusiasm into it than Axel was. He wrapped his arms around the redhead's slender waist to pull them closer together, which made Axel gasp. He took the opportunity the experimentally snake his tongue between the other's open lips, earning a groan of approval from Axel as they began to dance.

It was pretty much magic, and Roxas couldn't get enough. Every time Axel's tongue brushed up against his, it was like a new fire spreading through his chest and _holy fuck, _he tasted delicious.

Soon though, much too soon, they broke apart, breathing hard.

"Sorry," Roxas mumbled, "I didn't mean to like, _attack _you." A silly thing for him to worry about, sure, since Axel was the one to start the kiss in the first place, but still.

Axel cracked a goofy smile. "Trust me, I don't mind."

Suddenly Roxas remembered what it was he needed to talk to Axel about. "Listen, Axe, I wanted to talk... about us. And I'm not really sure how I'm gonna handle the whole Naminé situation—"

"Wait, Rox," Axel interrupted, "there's something you gotta know about me first. I've been trying to get it off my chest for a while, pretty much since day one actually."

_Oh God, what is it? He's moving? He's got AIDS? He's __**straight! **__Oh my God, I bet he is, yep that's it, he's straight. Dammit-_

"Lemme just start off by saying that I care about you, a _lot. _You know that, right?"

Roxas went to nod, and as he did so, an unfamiliar voice called out from the direct of the doorway, "You what?"

Both men whipped their heads around to view the source of the voice; a tall man with dishwasher blond hair that Roxas did not recognize. He was leaned up against the doorframe with his arms crossed. He had a sour expression on his otherwise lovely face, and it seemed so out of place there. He didn't strike Roxas as the type to be angry. But now, his sharp, icy blue eyes cut like a knife.

"D-Demyx…" Axel whispered. Demyx? Roxas could swear he heard that name before…

"Who's this, Axel?" He asked, confused at the sudden tension, "Roommate?"

The redhead swallowed. "N-no. This is what I was trying to talk to you about…"

Demyx cut in, "I'm not his roommate, _Roxas,_" the blonde winced at the sound of his name being used so harshly, "I'm his _boyfriend. _Or ex, now, I don't know. Either I've been replace or you've been jipped. Either way, I think this calls for an explanation."

Roxas froze. Axel had never, _never_ said anything about a boyfriend! Roxas was about to break up with his girlfriend for someone who was _taken._ Never in his life had he felt so betrayed. And what was worse, _he _was just as guilty as Axel. Karma was a bitch.

He immediately jumped off the couch and took several steps back from Axel. "Y-you… why? Why didn't you say something to me! I was gonna leave Naminé! What the fuck did you think you had to gain, lying to us?" Why he was defending the angry boyfriend, he didn't know exactly, but just about any reason to be mad at Axel seemed like a pretty good one at the time. "What was I to you? Because I'd really like to know!"

Demyx chimed in, "I'd actually like to know this too, Axel, what exactly is he to you?"

A single tear slid from the corner of Axel's strikingly bright green eyes, which only looked even brighter now that the rims and the whites were tinted pink.

"I'm sorry," he said thickly, "to both of you. I know how wrong and selfish this is of me, but," he took a deep breath, "I think I love both of you. And I don't know who to choose. I was gonna talk to you about it, individually, to try to come up with a solution. But then, well, this happened..."

Roxas was speechless. On one hand, there was a pretty adorable crying redhead standing next to him, who had just, however of a train wreck it might have been, confessed _love. _On the other hand, he was a vile dirty traitorous manipulative bitch that absolutely did not deserve any of it. He found no remorse for Axel. He just felt very hurt.

"I'm out of here," he said, his traitorous voice breaking on him. He would go home, and he would face Naminé; tell her exactly what happened so he could beg on his knees for her forgiveness. He should never have considered leaving her. He passed Axel (taking extra care not to touch him as he did so) and grabbed his coat off of the chair.

"Please, Roxas wait," Axel begged.

Surprising both himself and Axel, Roxas waited. He stopped and turned around, hands on his hips. "What, Axel? You gonna tell me that this is all a joke? Because please, for the love of God don't tell me that, 'cause that's _sick. _What is it then, huh? What more do you have to say to me?"

Axel didn't say anything for a minute. He probably didn't even _have _anything to say.

"I don't want you to leave," he uttered quietly. Roxas snorted.

"Fuck you," he hissed menacingly. Demyx didn't try to stop him for leaving, he just stepped right aside and let Roxas storm past him. Once out of the apartment, Roxas hurriedly put his coat on (inside out, I might add) and punched the elevator button with one thought in his mind: _He didn't care._

* * *

><p>"What the fuck, Axel?" Demyx demanded, his icy blue eyes watering. "What was so <em>wrong <em>with our relationship? What did I do wrong? What didn't I do for you?"

Then, just like that, it all came out. Everything that Axel had pent up, pretty much since they'd started dating; things he'd kept quiet for Demyx's sake.

"You were going out and _fucking _other people!" He yelled, "All the time! You were just all "oh, yeah I'm gonna go have sex willy nilly" like it was okay!"

"Don't try to make this about me! _You _were doing it too!' Demyx retorted hotly.

"No, I wasn't," said Axel through gritted teeth, "I never cheated on you, not once, I just _said _those things so that you didn't feel bad. I _just wanted you to be happy_."

Demyx crossed his arms. "Uhh excuse me? I'm not the fault at fault. You just said yourself; _you agreed to it. _How was I supposed to know you weren't happy? And by the way, _I'm _not the one that knocked up some slut and got caught having an _affair _with some kid that I barely even know!"

Well, there was nothing Axel could've said to that.

"I mean, seriously, you couldn't have just _said _something to me? We could've talked things out, you didn't have to go and find somebody else!" Axel could hear tears in Demyx's voice; they were well on their way to the surface, "Why couldn't you just talk to me?"

"Whoa whoa, hold up," Axel interrupted, "It's not like I just _chose _to fall for someone else! Is that what you think!" The anger was steadily rising in his voice, that kind of anger that he knew could scare people shitless. "You think that I haven't been beating myself up for like, _a month_ trying to _avoid _this outcome! You wanted to know why I'm sick, _this is fucking why!_ I never said anything to you because I wanted this to work! I didn't want to lose you. _I didn't want to be alone._"

Demyx wasn't looking at him anymore. He was staring at Axel's feet, at his silly moon boots with flames on them. He stared hard, like he was trying to fry them with his mind.

"And you love him?" he asked quietly. The hurt in his voice rang loud and clear. Axel didn't want to answer; he really _really _didn't want to answer. He wanted to lie his little heart out and just hug Demyx and never let him go and tell him that everything would be alright. But he'd come this far, this was something he couldn't run away from anymore.

"I love _you,_" he began at a whisper, "and you _have _to believe that. But I can't lie to you, Dem, I let myself get attached to him. I... I love him too."

Oh, for the love of _fuck, _he sounded so cliché! He listened to the words come out of his mouth as though they were taken right from the script of a crappy soap opera. He wouldn't believe stupid crap like that if their roles were switched, if Demyx were trying to convince him. But then again, they'd been here before, hadn't they?

Demyx refused to look at him. He looked all around; at the stove, at the pretty stone Axel had brought him, at his feet. He swallowed visibly and sniffled once, three or four tears spilling over the rims of his bright eyes.

"I-Axel... I just- I-I can't," he said quickly, his melodious voice cracked and broken. He spun on his heel and ran out the broken door. Before it shut completely, he poked his head back in, "By the way, Larxene's waiting for you at the hospital," he spat harshly, then shut the door noisily behind him, making Axel's corkboard (which had adorned Roxas' face) fell to the floor.

And Axel was alone.

That eerie, empty feeling set on him, like when you open the door of an air-conditioned house and step outside into sweltering summer heat. The thick, humid kind that makes you feel like you're suffocating even though you're breathing normally.

He hadn't felt like this since his parents left him.

And he hadn't let himself think of his parents since the funeral. Since the day Reno left.

* * *

><p>"<em>No! No, I don't believe you! They aren't gone!"<em>

_Axel collapsed onto the floor _(the same floor, in fact, that he was standing on today)_ sobbing hard. The policeman that stood in the doorway got down on one knee to try to touch Axel, to comfort him, but Reno pushed him away._

_"Don't, yo! I got this."_

_Reno had his arms around him, but he barely felt it. He barely felt anything._

_"Get away from me!" he snarled, pushing Reno away from him as well, "You're leaving! You're leaving just like they did!"_

_Reno said nothing. How could he? He _was _leaving; he was being deployed to Midgar and there was nothing he could do about it. He was literally leaving the world and he wasn't coming back for at least four years. It wasn't _his _fault; he didn't know that his parents were going to die._

_Axel looked up to meet the cop's eyes. They were ugly, brown and slanted. They were full of pity and sympathy. Axel must have looked pretty bad, because the man in uniform took several steps back from him. _

_"How?" he asked sharply, addressing the cop. All the officer had managed to get out was "Son, there's been an accident. I'm extremely sorry to tell you this but your parents have died-" before Axel freaked out, and Reno, for the first time in his life, was forced to take on the role of mature big brother._

_The cop cleared his throat, "The gummi hangar collapsed; we are unsure of the source of the disaster at this time. We're looking into the possibility that it may have been the work of terrorists. They're building a memorial in their memory, along with all the others that have perished-"_

_Axel wasn't listening anymore. How could he care about something as stupid as a memorial when his _parents were dead? _They were gone. He'd never go out to breakfast on Sunday with his father again. He wouldn't bring his mother lunch when he came over to do laundry ever week. They'd never make another gay joke towards he and his brother, and he and his brother would never in turn bring them home another boyfriend to meet._

_He'd never lost someone extremely close to him before this, let alone _two _parents at once. How the hell was life supposed to go on after this? When he'd turned eighteen, he wasn't expecting to have to tackle the world on his own, he wasn't ready for that! How was he supposed to go on, with virtually no form of guidance, not even a big brother? _They were dead.

_The thought was continually crossing his mind, but his mind refused to register it. When he closed his eyes he could see his mother's face, laugh lines and all, framed by thick, red curls that were just a shade darker than his and Reno's. She had been so full of life, how could that have been taken away from her so quickly?_

_The three of them jumped at another knock on the door. What would this one say? Axel wondered. He couldn't handle any more bad news._

_Reno was the one to get up off the floor and wrench open the door. Through it ran Squall Leonhart. _

_"Reno! Have you turned on the news! The gummi hangar, it collapsed! At first they were saying it's an accident, but now they don't know! Are your parents... oh." He shut up, having noticed the cop and distraught Axel on the floor._

_"Oh my God... I'm so sorry," said Leon, taking Reno into a gentle hug._

_Then, before Axel knew it, the two of them were hugging and kissing and crying, and Axel was still on the floor, all alone, while the cop was very awkwardly and pointedly looking away. Axel didn't have a Leon. Saïx wouldn't come for him. Saïx wouldn't come to hug him or hold him or kiss the pain away. He'd lost his parents, and he was losing Reno. He never _had _Saïx to begin with. Where would that leave him?_

_The funeral was a small, hushed affair. Nobody knew or cared that Ariel and Eric Sinclair had died. They were just another of the hundreds of graves Hollow Bastion filled that week. Axel, Reno, and Leon attended, as did a few of their parent's former friends and surviving colleagues, but none that Axel knew. They were just faceless people dressed in black. He didn't remember if he cried that day, but he was sure Reno did. _

_He buried the grief deep inside that day; locked it, far underneath the surface to deal with another day. he stoically thanked Leon for offering him time off, but didn't take it, and he didn't go with Reno to see him off, nor did he even say goodbye to his big brother (how though, he'd wondered, did they even get to Midgar with no gummi hangar?) Life would get easier, he'd assumed, if he'd just ignore it._

* * *

><p>Axel didn't know how he went from standing to the floor, but he did. His wished, for the first time in years, that he could ask his dad what to do. He wished that he could go down to the crappy little diner on the corner to find him, sitting in their usual seat, having already ordered coffees for the both of them.<p>

But he was still gone. There was such a solidity, a permanence to forever, that you just can't understand, can't fathom until you really experience it. Never was never, and there was no taking that back.  
>Axel was alone.<p>

Today he lost Demyx. That was a blow. Today he lost Roxas. That was a blow. But today, he'd also lost his parents all over again. He'd patched things up with Reno since then, but he was so far away. But, Reno was all he had left now, while he was on the verge of breaking.

It was a long shot, but he picked up his cell phone with shaking hands and dialed his brother's number.

"_Yo, this is Reno-"_

"Hey, it's Axel," he choked out.

"-_I'm not in right now, so I'll just give ya the beep, hopefully you know what to do with it! Beeeeeep! Ha! Fooled you, didn't I? Okay, here's the real beep." _Beep.

"Hey, it's Axel," he repeated, "I-I wanted to talk to you because... because I don't know what to do. I went and did that thing that you told me not to do, and now they're both gone. And I keep thinking... about _them_. Needless to say, I'm not doing so hot. Please, just call me as soon as you can." He swallowed thickly as he hung up the phone.

"Guess it's time to see Larxene," he said to nobody. Suddenly having a kid and a girlfriend (wife?) he didn't love didn't sound like such a bad idea. At least she was somebody. He grabbed his skateboard and left the house.

Despite the hospital being on the South side, he arrived there only minutes later. He ignored the fluttering eyelashes the girl at the reception desk was giving him and promptly asked where he could find Larxene.

"Another one?" she asked, "What a shame. Fourth floor, left off the elevator, down the big hallway, just past oncology. Can't miss it."

He tried to memorize her directions as he punched the up button on the elevator. Hospital lifts are so weird. They had two sets of doors, one on each side, and it was hard to remember which one to use to exit, since they led to different place. It was an awkward ride up. He shared it with a middle aged nurse that had a cart full of something that smelled, and with a little girl clinging to the leg of her mother. All three sets of eyes were on him, and for not the first time in his life, he wished the fame away. After all, he didn't get the paycheck of a superstar, that was for damn sure.

Only one set of the doors opened, so he took them, on the presumption that the other set was for staff only, and this was the way he needed to go. But he couldn't remember, unfortunately, which was the right way to go. So he turned to the nurse.

"Excuse me, ma'am," he said politely, "Which way to maternity?"

She pointed down a hallway to his left, so he thanked her and took it. He soon passed a sign that read "Oncology," as well as a room with glass walls, in which he could see several little bald children playing on the floor without a care in the world, while their troubled parents were left to speak with the doctors. He swallowed the lump in his throat and pressed on.

The hall narrowed considerably, but it soon came out to a generic-looking waiting room with the sign "Maternity" hanging over it. In the room were seated a handful of men, at least seven or eight, in fact there was only one female in the room; a young, pretty dark haired woman who was so pregnant she looked like she was about to pop.

"Hey, Axel," a voice called out somberly to him. It was a familiar voice, though it was not feminine, and _certainly _not the one he was expecting to hear here. He turned to greet the man.

"Hey Marly."

He looked _terrible_, which was something he'd never allowed Axel, or anyone for that matter, to see in the past. His hair, which was normally curled and teased to perfection, hung in flat, matted layers against his head. Instead of the designer jeans he usually showed off with a flair, he wore battered old sweatpants and a gray hoodie. He had even allowed a short layer of light brown stubble to become visible on his normally flawless chin. At first glance, you would certainly not anticipate that he was one of the top boys for _Poir._

Axel took a seat away from Marluxia, despite his familiarity with the pinkette. He didn't much feel like making small talk. Instead, he surveyed the rest of the men scattered across the room, and the first thought to wriggle its way into his unbiased mind was _scumbag. _He couldn't help but notice it; _all _of them looked in a similar state to Marluxia, except they were _grimy_, whereas he remained squeaky clean, despite his lack of attempts to make himself pretty. Axel couldn't help but notice it, and, not to be an ass, but he was definitely the best-looking out of all of them,

A very stressed-looking Larxene emerged from the office opposite the chair Axel was sitting in. She identified him immediately.

"Oh, good, you're here. About time," she said, wiping the bags under her eyes, "I'll get you signed in and they'll send a doctor out to take care of you. Might as well make yourself comfortable, cause this shit takes _forever._"

He just nodded to acknowledge her and stared at the floor, trying to become mesmerized in its colorful pattern. There was no way he could be comfortable in a situation like that. He wished Demyx were there with him. He wished Roxas were there with him. He wasn't brave enough to pick up one of the dozen baby magazines set out for future parents, so he just sat and waited, letting terrifying thoughts creep up on him in the silence.

Suppose he had a child? What would happen to him then? His career? His sanity? What would the kid look like? Boy or girl? He, or she, would have green eyes, surely, since Larxene _did _in fact have green eyes. It would have a widow's peak, a dominant feature that Axel possessed. He didn't want to think about babies; he _never _planned to have one, _ever. _He never played 'Mommy and Daddy' like most children did, and by the time he'd fully decided on his sexuality he'd just accepted that he'd never have one and moved on. Axel was the youngest in his immediate family, and immediate family was all he'd ever had to begin with. Both of his parents were only-children, and he'd only ever met one of his grandparents. That being said, kids were a foreign entity to him. How was he supposed to raise one?

He felt trapped, and doomed. He knew what happened to people when they had children: They turned ugly and gray, and they get poor and cranky, and don't get to sleep properly for at least eighteen years. It was such a big commitment, such and adult thing to sign up for. And Axel _was not an adult!_

And he didn't even have anyone left to help him. Not even Demyx. A scary baby was coming and a scary mommy was coming, and he had nobody to tell him what to do. Were he not trying to look calm and collected like the rest in the room he probably would've started hyperventilating right there.

Suddenly the door to the office opened again. Surely it was the unborn child's doctor, ready to take the evidence of his (her?) existence off of Axel's tongue and prove him responsible for the parasite spawning in Larxene's uterus.

It was not. It was her again. She looked terrible. Her face had aged considerably with weary since he'd first met her; she looked like she hadn't slept in years. Her natural dark hair color was starting to show at the roots, and the rest of the silky blonde locks she once wore proudly was greasy and lifeless, and piled in a turd bun at the top of her head. Parenthood was starting to take an effect on her already, and she wasn't even showing yet.

"Kris, and Derek," she read off the two manila envelopes she was clutching. The man in the chair next to Axel, as well as the one four down from Marluxia, straightened immediately at the mention of their names. "I have your results."

They looked just as terrified as Axel felt. This was obviously not planned, and most of them probably knew her as well as he did, if that. Everyone in the room was staring at her, hoping. She didn't waste any time in carefully and dramatically opening the envelope, she tore it right open with angry and vicious claws. It took her about thirty seconds to run her eyes over the paper before she called, "Hey you! Aunt Jemima! How the fuck do you read these things?"

Axel blanched. _This _was the woman he might possibly have to spend the next two decades or so of his life with.

A harassed-looking dark woman came in, explaining to Larxene in a hushed whisper how to decipher the results.

"Okay then. Derek, it ain't you, get the fuck outta here."

The scruffy man next to Axel muttered, "Thank God," to himself and hurriedly got up to rush out of the room. He and Larxene didn't even acknowledge each other, he was just _gone. _She didn't seem to care; she was already working on the next package.

"Kris…" she read, "What a gay way to spell your name, who uses a K?"

He didn't answer her; he just swallowed visibly and shrugged his shoulders. Axel was becoming even more nervous. If she was going to be making gay jokes…

Thirty breathless seconds passed, before Larxene grimaced and said sarcastically, "Bravo Kris with a K, you're the lucky winner."

Poor Kris looked like he was about to pass out, and the rest of the room sighed a breath of relief, save for the other pregnant woman, who had tactfully hid herself behind a magazine while the rest of this was going on. Axel wasted not a second longer there. No, while it took minutes to dawn on the others that they weren't fathers, Axel was already out the door.

**Coming up next! Ex-boyfriends, mysterious figures in black, explosions! WHAT IS THIS SORCERY? **

**Lol I'm terrible to you guys :3**

**V**


	9. Decessus

**Hey! Look at this! It's a chapter on time! For once… and I've gotta say, personally this is my favorite chapter that I've written so far. You're probably going to hate it. But yeah, no extensive A/N today, I want ya to get right down to it ;) Probably full of typos... my "editing" consisted of skimming.**

**Disclaimer: If I owned Kingdom Hearts, the Organization uniforms would consist of hot pants and no shirt. Needless to say, I **_**don't **_**in fact own Kingdom Hearts or any of its affiliates… unfortunately.**

Axel had his skateboard with him, but he didn't use it. He just carried it lamely under his arm. This was a time for deep thinking, and previous experiences with certain Roxai had taught him that riding and thinking weren't a very good combination. His legs carried him numbly, aimlessly. He was having something of an out-of-body experience, the kind you get when everything and nothing is on your mind at the same time. While this was the case, a certain message repeated itself over and over in his head: _You are not a father. _

"I am never, ever having sex with a woman again," he vowed quietly to himself, silently sending a prayer of thanks to God. Since when did he pray?

Now that _that _was out of the way, he could focus on things a bit higher up on his priority list. Namely: Roxas. Dammit, he would miss that little fucker. Maybe he should be paying more attention to Demyx; _he _might actually take Axel back. But was that really what he wanted?

He walked the streets without any destination in mind, trying to think of a way to make everything okay, and trying for the umpteenth time to figure out who he'd rather have. But they were so different from each other! He loved Demyx for different reasons he loved Roxas. They were both beautiful, but that part didn't concern Axel any, appearance didn't go further with him than a first impression. Demyx was such a good soul. He was still a child at heart, he loved everything and everyone. He was a talented musician, and he never left Axel bored.

Roxas, on the other hand… he was smart, and insightful; he looked at things in a way Axel would never have dreamed possible. He took one look at you and it was like he _knew_ exactly who you were. Underneath that tough guy persona he tried so hard to keep up, Axel knew he had a heart of gold, and he always kept him guessing. Which begs the question: How could Axel possibly choose between them?

_Roxas wouldn't cheat on you. _

Maybe all hope wasn't lost. He and Roxas still had to maintain a relationship, at least on a professional level. While things concerning work were up in the air at the moment, they'd _have _to see each other again, for that purpose. Maybe it wouldn't be possible to get Roxas to trust him again, but it was worth a try. He cared, right? You don't get upset if you don't care. There was still a chance of building a healthy relationship. Maybe, _maybe, _there was still a glimmer of hope for them.

He retrieved his wallet from his back pocket and pulled from it the strip of photos he had saved of himself and Roxas. Despite the really shitty mood he was in, Axel couldn't help but giggle at the blonde's poor embarrassed face in the last one. He was so cute—

Abruptly the photos were gone from his hands, with a paper cut in place; someone, or some_thing_, snatched the strip right out of his hands and ran away with it. What the fuck? Who would want a picture of Roxas? Axel just barely caught a glimpse of swishy black fabric disappear into an alleyway.

Now, Axel wasn't stupid. He knew better than to chase a mysterious and potentially dangerous (yeah, paper cuts are lethal, right?) figure into a dark alley, especially in a part of town he wasn't familiar with. But dammit, those were _his _pictures of Roxas, and he wanted them back. Besides, what really did he have left to lose? So, ignoring his better judgment, he jumped onto his board and propelled himself after the thief.

"Hey, what the fuck!" He called out to the stranger loudly, to let them know that he was coming after them. He could see them moving, and were it not for his skateboard, he wouldn't ever have been able to keep up, because that fucker moved _fast._

If the mysterious person heard him, he didn't say so. He didn't even turn to see if Axel was following him. He just kept running around buildings, through alleyways, and Axel pursued relentlessly. He became more determined with each turn; he was driven mainly by curiosity now, because he still couldn't figure out who would go to so much trouble to get those pictures. Unless…

"Roxas!" he called. He sped right passed a wrought iron fence into a park, and came across the very last thing he expected.

Now, seeing Leon without his work clothes was strange enough, but it wasn't _that _weird. No, what was weird was that he was battle-clad, and sword fighting with _Saïx, _wielding, by the way, a sword that was bigger than a bazooka. Seeing _that _nearly had Axel convinced that he'd simply passed out at the hospital and was given drugs that which had hallucinations as a side effect. Yeah, that's gotta be it.

The shrouded figure went right to Saïx, who was wearing a similar jacket. But when the "person" wriggled out of the black cloak, Axel's jaw dropped.

_WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT THING!_

He was definitely hallucinating. He had to be, because swaying alongside Saïx was this—metal _thing_. Its body was sort of similar to that of a woman, but Axel was positive he'd never seen a woman, or any human being for that matter, that could be shaped like that. It had no hands or feet; it balanced itself on the tips of its legs. Then its face _unzipped itself_, to stare at him with cloudy yellow eyes.

Neither Leon nor Saïx took any notice of him. If they did, they didn't show it, they just carried out their battle. The thing—Saïx's ally, began to circle them, trying to close in on Leon while he was distracted. It was successful; it strutted over so Leon so that it was directly behind him, preparing to strike. Axel noticed that it still had the photo slip in its hands… and he made a crazy decision. With a mighty battle cry and absolutely nothing to defend himself with, he lunged at the creature with everything he had.

"Leon, watch out!" he cried out to alert Leon of the situation. He felt the urge to triumphantly laugh like a maniac when he successfully knocked the creature away from Leon, trapping it to the ground. Leon was aware of his and the other enemies' position now, but he did not avert his attention from Saïx, as the blunette was attacking relentlessly with a giant spiked claymore sword.

The thing beneath Axel wriggled out of his grip easily, and slapped him in the face, _hard. _Its flesh was cold, hard, and stinging, but it was undeniably flesh. He peered at the environment around him out of scrunched, stinging eyes, to find that the pictures had fluttered to the ground, and his attacker had strutted jerkily back over to defend Saïx. When Axel finally had the pictures in his hands, he screamed, without thinking, "Everybody fucking stop! Now!"

To his surprise, they _did _stop. Neither man moved, though the creature still swayed back and forth, as if awaiting orders from Saïx.

He looked different from the last time Axel saw him. If it was even possible, he looked even weirder than his Prideland descent made him naturally. He had an X-shaped scar, right between his eyes. His eyes, Axel noticed, were no longer blue, like he remembered them to be, but a gleaming, menacing gold, which were now crinkling as the man turned up the corners of his lips to sneer at Axel.

"It's good to see you, Knuckles," he said, as if it were absolutely _not _good to see him at all, "Nice tattoos."

"Wish I could say the same about you," he hissed to his ex, who really wasn't even his ex at all, "Nice scar."

"Axel, get out of here," Leon cut in before things could get too heated, "Don't be stupid, you aren't armed."

"You guys wanna tell me what the hell is going on first!" Axel yelled angrily. He didn't like being left in the dark when was obviously really fucked up shit. Organic machines don't come out of nowhere to steal your photographs and bring them to your ex, who is fighting your boss with ridiculously large, unworldly weapons. That _doesn't _happen. So either this was an extremely fucked up dream, a drug-induced hallucination, or hell was about to freeze.

"I see I've overstayed my welcome," Saïx deadpanned. He lifted his hand up, and a smoky block orb erupted around it, growing so large it eventually consumed him, and the metallic creature. Axel's knees gave out; he collapsed onto the hard, cold ground, with dead and half frozen leaves crunching underneath him. Leon growled in frustration and aggressively sunk his blade into the ground. Axel was beginning to hyperventilate, so Leon bent down on one knee and rested a hand on his shoulder.

"You okay?" he asked, "I guess seeing something like that for the first time would come as a bit of a shock."

Axel took several, shallow breaths. "What the hell was that thing?"

Leon cleared his throat uncomfortably. "We call them Dusks."

"We?"

_**BOOM.**_

The playscape, just twenty or so feet from them, was destroyed completely within a matter of seconds, with an earsplitting screech of bending metal, a lot of smoke and a puff of dust. Bits of plastic and metal flew in all directions, one of which grazed Axel's cheek before he'd even _considered _reacting to the pandemonium. Thankfully, Leon was faster than him, and managed to shield them both with his arms before they could take any real damage.

Then, somewhere not so far away, another building was beginning to crumple.

Leon cursed loudly and grabbed Axel by his upper arm, yanking him to his feet. "We need to go, _now._"

Axel struggled to keep up with what was going on around him; he was still dazed, confused, and completely convinced that he was dreaming. The sting from the welt on his cheek was becoming easier and easier to ignore.

"Go? Go where?" he asked stupidly.

"We have to go get Roxas, then get to _Poir_ before we die! Do you understand!" He shouted. They were blasted into the air from the impact of yet another explosion nearby. The trees and grass around them that was once a beautiful, healthy green were burning, and some were even uprooted. Axel could hear blaring horns and screams of panic nearby and _goddammit, _his wrist _really fucking hurt._ This was much, much too painful to be a dream. He used his other arms to hoist himself to his feet and follow Leon, who was running whilst crouched down all ninja style.

"Why Roxas!" he shouted. What the fuck was this all about? First his pictures of Roxas, now Roxas himself? What made him so special? Why not Marluxia, or Zexion, or Demyx? And what good would getting to a burned down mansion do them?

Leon turned around and faced him fully, his eyes locked on him seriously. "Axel. I promise to explain everything to you in _extensive _detail later, okay? But right now, it's really fucking important, like _life or death _important, that we find Roxas _now _and get him to _Poir._ It's safe there."

They took off running, Leon clutching his forearm protectively. Whatever Leon was doing, Axel thought, must be like, a really big deal. He'd never thought his boss liked him very much, and at this point he was nothing more than deadweight; why not just leave him for dead? A million and one questions materialized in his mind, all of which would have to wait until a moment that wasn't occupied with running for his life from sourceless exploding things.

The hospital was just about the only place on the south side of Hollow Bastion that Axel knew how to get to, because it was directly off of Broadway Ave. But he didn't know any of the streets or alleys that Leon was taking him through. He did know that Roxas lived around there somewhere, so it didn't surprise him any when Leon steered him into a seemingly random building.

"Call whoever you need to, I'm going up to get Roxas," Leon shouted over the din. With that, he left Axel alone in the lobby. He made a desperate decision to flip his cell phone open and scroll down to the D's.

Roxas felt perfectly justified in being pissed off. Axel had lied to him; he had a boyfriend! He'd toyed with Roxas when he knew perfectly well that they were _both _unavailable. He probably didn't give two shits about Roxas, and if that were the case, to hell with it if he was gonna give two shits about him.

Why then, did Roxas feel like all of this was his fault?

To be fair, he did betray Naminé, exactly as Axel had betrayed both him _and _Demyx. He'd toyed with them and told them empty words. _Life sucked. _

As silly as it sounded, he kind of wanted to talk to Cloud. His elder brother wasn't the most reliable form of guidance, but he made a point of being there whenever Roxas needed him. This afternoon, though, he was either napping in his room or working; and neither of which allowed Roxas to talk to him.

"Roxas, are you okay?"

Whoa, hold up. When had he started crying? He wiped a few stray tears from his cheeks and smeared them into the couch, trying to dispose of the evidence. He knew it was no good, since Naminé had very plainly just seen him cry. And even if she hadn't, his eyes were surely red and his face blotchy and tear-stained. But he would try to head her off anyway; he didn't need her seeing this.

"Yeah," his traitorous nose sniffled involuntarily as if to directly contradict him. "I'm all right."

One feeling that Roxas had not expected to feel at the time was insecurity. Curious emotion, insecurity was. He'd experienced it as much as the next person when he was a young teenager, but never really had he felt that something was particularly wrong with him. But now, suddenly, that feeling that he was worthless, it started creeping up on him. He figured he must be; Naminé didn't love him, and she never would. Axel didn't love him. Roxas wasn't shallow; he knew there were, as they say, "millions of fish in the sea." But there were only two fish he'd ever really wanted, and they just flashed their pretty scales at him, then swam away and left him with the bottom feeders—maybe he'd taken the metaphor a bit too far there. But the fact remained that he felt used, regardless of anyone else's intentions.

His train of thoughts abruptly skidded to a halt when he felt a pair of thin, gentle arms wrap around his shoulders as Naminé hugged him from behind the couch. Where did _that _come from? It there was any contact between them, _ever, _it was always Roxas that initiated it. He must've looked pretty miserable for Princess Prude herself to come over and touch him.

It registered to the nice, polite part of his mind that it was an awful thing to think about Naminé, but the brutally honest part of himself, that simply called them how it saw them, knew it was the truth. Damn, what an ass he was.

"Are you sure?" she asked softly. He wriggled out of her grip (which did not take much at all) and turned to face her. He didn't want to turn out like Axel, _who's probably having a date with his hand,_ he thought bitterly to himself. He'd tell her about the almost-affair he'd had with Axel, and beg her not to hold it against him. _Just please, please don't cry, _he pleaded silently.

Before he could so much as open his mouth to confess, however, the door burst open and Xion sprinted in, panting hard. _How fast could she have possibly been running to deplete her perpetual energy? _He wondered to himself.

"Guys, guys! Turn on the news, something's happening outside!" She screamed, throwing herself to the floor in front of the TV set to do it herself.

"—_strange disturbances, including Pentigo Park and Hollow Bastion University, as well as, oddly enough, a clothing factory, all coincidentally on the South side. Nevertheless, citizens are advised to stay indoors until the source of these explosions is identified. This footage was taken and sent to the studio minutes ago on an amateur camcorder…"_

While the anchorwoman continued, on the screen appeared a shaky home video of a little girl in a ball gown at what appeared to be a birthday party. The camera then zoomed in on a building visible out one of the windows in the background, where smoke was billowing up into the sky and the structure was sinking. "_—initially thought to be the work of pranksters, we are now considering the possibility of a series of terrorist attacks. More on the story as it develops…"_

"Shit…" said Roxas, having all but forgotten his previous endeavors. "This looks really bad." He turned his gaze over to both women, who were staring out the windows as though looking for verification of these explosions.

"We'd probably get a better view if we went into the art room," Roxas suggested, being rather alarmed and anxious to see as well, "since it's mostly windows in there anyway."

They both nodded and took off down the narrow hallway, Roxas flanking them. They were already inside, and he was in the doorway when he heard it; when he _felt _it. A loud, deep thud echoed through the building, one that he could feel underneath his shoes before he could hear it in his ears. Somewhere nearby, somewhere _dangerously_ nearby, one of the aforementioned explosions was happening.

"Oh my gosh! Roxas! Come look at this!"

He followed the girls into the room and saw it. The building right next door to theirs was coming down! Naminé was so close to the windows she could have been touching the glass.

"Nam, you shouldn't stand so close—"

You know how people say that during a catastrophe, everything slows down, and you can remember every single minute detail, because of like, the adrenaline surge or something? All of that was bullshit. Because Roxas could not remember a single thing between standing in his quaint little art room with his girlfriend, and _not _standing in a pile of rubble with no girlfriend. He couldn't hear anything, perhaps he'd been stricken deaf by the sound wave? Or perhaps there simply wasn't anything _to _hear. There wasn't time to be dazed, he looked around wildly in search of a sign of life, and screamed, not quite loud enough to wake the dead, when he saw _it._

It. It being her, her being Naminé, and Naminé being dead.

But it wasn't _her. _She was gone, and the mangled body as only an empty shell, the shell that used to _hold _Naminé. It was sickening to look at. There were shattered remains of the broken window stuck in its face, but there was no blood trickling out. Its spine was bent at an impossible angle, and its pale hair was fanned out around the dust and cement, making it look something like a fallen angel.

"Naminé…" he coughed hoarsely, trying to call her back. But he knew it was useless. Her—its, its eyes weren't blue anymore. They were gray; the light had left them. They hung at half-lid, staring at him without seeing. Its face, what was left of it, was sullen and gaunt like a tired ghost's.

Roxas got up onto his hands and knees and tried crawling toward it, but upon doing so he viewed for the first time its ankle, near which a fibular bone was poking right out of the skin. He vomited on the floor without bothering to aim it anywhere. He couldn't look at the thing anymore; he couldn't bear to look at the broken woman who he'd once believed was the love of his life.

"Naminé, wait!" he cried out desperately, "Please, don't leave without me!" He dug his nails into whatever it was they happened to be sunken into at the moment, which must have been hard and rough because it made them bleed. But his hands were already in searing pain; he didn't care. She was _gone,_ and she was never, ever going to come back. She left him behind with nothing to cling to. He hoped that at least, in a certain sense, that she died happy.

_She didn't know what I did,_ Roxas thought to himself, and may well have even spoken out loud, _and now she'll never know. I can never tell her. _The tears and the dust stung his eyes, so he shut them. He knew the building would probably come down soon, after a blow like that, but he didn't care enough to try to move. All of his life's work: His precious photos and everything else that was important to him was gone. It seemed now, like a better idea to just stay put and wait to die. Naminé would be where he was going, he was sure of it, and at least there his hands wouldn't hurt so goddamn bad.

"Roxas? Roxas, where are you?"

His eyes snapped open as soon as he heard the sound. _Xion._

He coughed shallowly. "Xion?" he called, "Xion, are you okay!"

"Roxas! I'm over here!" She called desperately, "I can't move! My leg is trapped, underneath the table! Where's Naminé?"

Suddenly, Roxas' eyes were swimming with tears again. He ignored Xion's question entirely.

"Stay calm!" he shouted, "I'm gonna come help you!"

He looked around the mess to see if he could spot a hint of Xion, or signs of a table. It was an unsightly view; the place was a disaster. Paints, brushes, and torn works of art littered the floor, along with plastic, shelves, sheet rock, fuzzy patches of insulation, glass, and broken cement. Finally, he was able to catch sight of a thin, bent piece of metal protruding from the rubble; the remnant of a table leg.

Roxas struggled to get to his feet, when he suddenly became aware of the source of the pain in his hands. Not just in his fingertips, on which the damage had been inflicted by himself, but the palms, and even the backs as well. They were bleeding and damaged heavily. It was pretty disgusting to look at, so he simply lowered his hands from his vision and pressed on. They could wait. Xion could not. A minute ago he didn't mind, or was possibly even keen for death to come. But there was no way he could abandon Xion like that. He would live, if for no other reason to keep her safe. She was all he had left.

He moved as quickly as he could to her location. Of course this was easier said than done; the room was cluttered and hard to get through even _before _this happened. At last he could make out one leg, sheathed in denim, followed by the rest of her body, then face, whose terrified child eyes looked up fearfully at him. One of them was red. Not the "I'm crying and/or tired" pink, no, bright scarlet, like the color of Axel's hair. She must have broken a blood vessel. It was frightening to look at, certainly, but it did not deter Roxas from looking for the source of her entrapment.

"Where are you stuck?" he asked her whimpering form. She wiggled around, trying to free herself, and then pointed to her leg, the one he could not see before. Her ankle was twisted in an odd, but not quite yet broken sort of way around the bent metal. He knelt down beside her.

"I'm going to take your shoe off, okay?"

She nodded at him, and he gently eased her sneaker off. It didn't put up much resistance, which meant her foot hadn't gotten around to swelling yet. That was a good sign. He then, _very _carefully, tried to bend her foot in a way that would allow it to slide between the table leg and the table itself, but she hissed and cried out in pain. Roxas heard another boom nearby; they were running out of time.

From the direction that he didn't even realize was the rest of his home, he heard a masculine voice cry out, "Roxas! Are you in here, can you hear me!"

Roxas could recognize the voice, but was unable to immediately identify it. Regardless, he immediately called back, "Yes! We're in here, we need help!" with as much volume as he could muster.

It seemed like an eternity passed before… Leon came into view? Roxas assumed after that that he'd probably died in the explosion after all. Why was his _boss, _of all people, here to rescue him, dressed in some kind of radical biking gear, and carrying the largest sword Roxas had ever seen?

No, he couldn't possibly have died; death wouldn't hurt this much. Unless he was a hell-condemned fag after all. But damn, if that were the case, and this was hell, people sure made a bigger fuss about it than necessary. Shredded hands were a bitch, but the pain was _manageable._

"Roxas, we have to leave, _now,_" said Leon, who at this point Roxas determined was nothing more than a hallucination. But hey, if hallucinations could help get Xion out to safety, he was willing to try anything.

"Can't. Gotta help Xion," he said numbly, trying to figure out yet another way to detangle her leg without inflicting further damage. Ghost-Leon approached him until Xion was in his line of sight.

"Hold that but of metal right there. Grip it tight," Leon instructed. Roxas nodded and did so, perchance that this Leon was actually real. The cold, dusty metal against his wounded palms stung something terrible, but he kept as firm a grip as his body would allow. Leon, meanwhile, set two gloved hands (lucky bastard) over the waxy plastic that once made up the surface of the table trapping Xion. He locked eyes with Roxas to ensure that he was holding on and, upon receiving the nod, heaved. To Roxas' surprise, it detached easily, freeing the weeping girl from her cage.

She cried out triumphantly and stood up, just because she could. Her eyes widened considerably when they fell upon the metal, stained with Roxas' blood.

"Oh my gosh, Roxas, what happened to your hands!" She yelled. Leon, who apparently was the real Leon after all, gingerly examined them briefly.

"We can fix them later," he assured them, "But we need to get you to safety. And that's not here."

"How do you know where safe is?" Roxas asked skeptically.

Leon shook his head, "Please Roxas, just trust me. The longer we stay here, the more danger we're in. Is there anyone else here with you?"

Roxas shook his head.

Xion, however, tugged at Roxas' sleeve and screamed, "Yes, _yes there is!_ What about Naminé!"

The lump in his throat began to compress in such an unbearable way that he couldn't hold back the tears anymore.

"N-no, Xion. She's—she's not here anymore," his eyes travelled over to where she lay, and Xion followed his gaze. When her eyes befell what remained of her best friend, she cried out in agony and threw herself into Roxas, sobbing. Under any normal kind of circumstanced Roxas would not allow this and would have thrown her off, but in all honesty, he needed this just as much as she did.

"We can send somebody to collect the body, so she can have a proper ceremony," said Leon gravely.

"Who the hell is _we!_" Roxas demanded, "What are you talking about, and why are you here! _You _know where safety is; _you _happen to show up right after my house gets bombed; who the hell are you!"

"I can tell you, but only if you let me get you out!" Leon growled, "I will tell you every damn detail you want to know _just as soon as we're out of a goddamned broken building!"_

Xion piped up, "Roxas, we should go with him. He did help us out an awful lot after all."

Roxas couldn't really see any other alternative, and now the panic alarm was sounding horrendously loudly throughout the building; the wind was rolling in through the broken windows, and the thuds and booms were becoming increasingly more frequent and loud. Nothing could be accomplished by staying. "All right."

"This way."

Roxas and Xion travelled closely as Leon wound his way through the dangerous maze, each nursing their wounds. The pain in Roxas' hands was getting worse. He could feel the hot, sticky liquid travelling down his fingertips, and along the grotesque, ragged skin that had become almost, but not completely detached from his palms during the explosion. He was missing about four fingernails altogether; it would be weeks before he could even so much as hold a pencil.

An eternity could've passed before they finally made it down to the lobby. In it were two pacing figures; one was Cloud, and the other was—

"Axel!"

"Great to see you too, Roxas. Yes I'm okay, don't worry…" Cloud mumbled under his breath.

The eccentric redhead was pacing nervously, and honestly, he looked like shit. His hair, though always wild, was even more unkempt than usual, and he too was covered in dirt and soot. One of his wrists was bent at an odd angle; his other hand, or forefinger, to be particular, was clamped between his teeth. As soon as Roxas spoke he snapped his head up, and relief spread visibly across his face.

"Are you alright! Holy shit, look at your hands! Leon, is he gonna be okay?"

"Axel." Roxas deadpanned, "What. Are. You. Doing. Here"

Axel rolled his eyes, grabbed Roxas by the upper arm, and started steering him towards the revolving doors.

"Hey! W-what are you doing!"

"Saving your life, dumbass," he said exasperatedly. He exchanged a look with Leon, and it didn't go unnoticed by Roxas. Seriously, what the hell!

Before he could protest and/or demand an explanation, the ceiling began caving in around them. There was no time for arguing, no time for fighting, no time for breathing, no time for _anything, _except running for dear life from being crushed by an eighteen story building. His body was on survival mode now, which meant if going with Axel kept him alive, that's where he would go, regardless of what his pissed off brain had to say about it. Live now, throw a bitch fit later.

Outside the building, things were even worse. It didn't even _look _like Hollow Bastion; it looked like a warzone. Down at street level, there were running, screaming people, scattering like ants around and through broken glass and other parts of destroyed buildings. There were also an increasing number of bodies littering the pavement, of those who had jumped out of their windows in a panic, thinking perhaps they could escape that way. Higher up, buildings everywhere were smoking, few were left unharmed. At sky level, were military aircrafts. Whether they be friend or foe, Roxas didn't know, and he was more intent on following Leon than finding out. He didn't know his boss very well, or trust him entirely, but as it was, he was Roxas' only hope for survival, unless by some miracle he didn't get hit by something. And as both Xion and his brother (how had he even gotten there, anyway?) were following too, it was just the obvious choice.

All the while Axel kept a firm grip on his arm, and Xion kept a firm grip on the back of his shirt. Soon the adrenaline pumping through his body was not enough to keep him from noticing the ever-growing ache in his legs and lungs from over exertion; he wasn't in the greatest shape. He tuned out everything else: the deafening sounds of panic, the putrid smell of burning flesh, that poor bleeding woman he just had to step over and leave behind, _everything _except the warm hand that gripped his arm, and keeping his legs moving. Eventually they would stop, right? Eventually the burn would go away the pain would go away. And hopefully, that was where he would be safe.

He ran without seeing, without thinking, without even hoping. He ran mechanically, for who knew how long. Breathe in, breathe out, one leg in front of the other, pain, repeat. Until finally, the hand keeping him glued to the world, the hand that kept him going, the hand that held him to his cycle, was gone. And where that hand left him, that was where he collapsed to the ground, having been literally thrown back into reality.

The first thing he noticed before opening his eyes was the sounds around him, or lack thereof. Aside from the heavy panting from his companions, he could hardly hear anything. The sounds of explosion and mass hysteria were naught but a background noise off in the distance. The air didn't smell heavily of smoke and bodies, only faintly of smoke. It smelled... fresh? Upon this observation, Roxas opened his eyes.

They were at _Poir. _Yes, _Poir. _And who was perched on the ash-ridden marble porch but Demyx. Fantastic. This was it?

"Uhh, Leon? I appreciate the effort, but this place is burned to the ground. How is that supposed to help us?" Roxas asked shakily, between heavy pants.

"It doesn't," said Leon through gritted teeth, "But we have to go inside to get there. And anyhow, do you see it getting bombed?"

He had a point there, so Roxas didn't reply. He didn't need to waste the energy. Looking around, he saw that Leon was the only one standing up. Xion was on the ground, holding her leg. She was no longer whimpering but her face was blotchy and tear-stained. Axel was sprawled across the marble front steps, holding his chest and breathing hard, apparently unaware that Demyx was standing over him. Roxas guessed that his stamina wasn't the greatest either. Even Cloud, who had won awards for Track in high school, was seated with his knees up.

"What's inside?" Cloud inquired, "And, sorry, could you tell me who are?"

Leon nodded curtly. "For the three of you that don't know me, my name is Leon. These two work for me," he pointed towards Roxas and Axel.

"Pleasure," said Cloud sarcastically, "Cloud. So what brings my little brother's boss and the freak I met at the bar the other say to our apartment building right when disaster strikes? Not that I'm not grateful, but can you see how from my perspective this all looks very sketchy?"

Personally Roxas agreed with Cloud, but he was either too tired or too scared to say so. Perhaps he, even more so than Cloud, was not happy about this, since he didn't trust Axel. Except now, he owed the stinking redhead his life.

"Hey, I'm just as much in the dark as you are!" said redhead spoke up, "I just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. Or the right place, depending on the way you look at it. Anyway, I just followed him 'cause it looked like he knew what he was doing. So it's all down to Squally here to explain to you what you're doing here, 'cause I don't know."

Roxas eyed Axel distrustfully, but he waited patiently for Leon to explain himself.

His boss pinched the bridge of his nose. "Listen, they're going to target this place next, _they know _we're here. Three's a tunnel of sorts inside, underneath, that will take us somewhere safe. I need you to give me the benefit of the doubt of just a few more minutes. When we get there, I will tell you why you're here, why I came for you, and why the city is under fire, and who it is that's firing."

Roxas didn't really see any other alternative. That was quite a bit of promising information. Whether Leon knew it, and would actually tell them everything if they did what he said was questionable, but so far he hadn't given Roxas any other reason not to trust him.

"Okay..." said Roxas slowly, turning everyone's attention to him, "I trust you."

Xion stood up, wobbling slightly, and gripped Roxas for support. "Me too. I owe you."

For the second time, Leon spun around and said briefly, "Follow me."

The difference inside the building since Roxas had last been there was astronomical. The floors, which were once shiny and glossy and donned with ornate rugs were dusty and covered in wreckage. Paintings that could well have been worth thousand were burned right through. Light streamed in from holes in the ceiling, walls, and windows that had lost their curtains. Broken vases scattered the floor, statues lie crumpled to ruins. The wallpaper was blackened from ash, as was everything else. It was a gloomy thing, seeing something that was once so magnificent and beautiful in such a ruined state.

"Are you sure it won't cave in on us?" Xion asked nervously, looking up fearfully at the broken ceiling.

"No," Leon replied shortly, "But coming through is necessary."

He opened a door underneath the remnant of the right stairwell, once that Roxas had never been through before. He pulled a flare from his pocket, lit it, and threw it through the doorway to reveal a staircase, leaning down into a now dimly lit basement. _Great... _Roxas thought to himself, _another layer that could cave down on us._ What an appropriate place to hide a passageway in.  
>Leon led them down the stairs into what appeared to be a giant computer. <em>What the hell! What is <em>_**this**__ doing underneath Poir? And this whole time too!_ Instead of leading them through the heavy-looking door on the other side of the room like Roxas suspected he would, he started fiddling around with the keyboard in front of the giant monitor.

"What are you doing?" Axel deadpanned, "I thought this was supposed to be a passageway."

Suddenly a bright white beam of light burst from the floor in one corner of the room, causing everybody to yelp in shock.

"Axel, your parents were gummi engineers, right?" Leon asked. Axel nodded an affirmation. "Did they ever explain to you how we get from one world to another?"

"Sort of," Axel replied. "They used to say that the worlds were connect like trees, and that they had lots of roots (routes) that we could travel on, branching out, so we could get everywhere and that the gummis allowed us to break through the atmosphere so we could use those routes. With the exception of the Twilight Town train, and the famous bridge between Radiant Gardens and Agrabah."

"Right," Leon agreed, "But what about the space _outside _the roots? What's there? What if we left this world outside a track? What would we find there?"

"I don't know," Axel said noncommittally, "Nothing?"

"You're on the right track," said Leon, "What waits there is not _nothing, _but space. Empty space, raw material that you can _build _in."

"Wait," Cloud interrupted, "You're telling us that all that empty space can be used? To support life?"

"Precisely," said Leon.

Axel pointed out, "But you'd need a really special gummi to be able to access an area such as that."

"Well, then it's a good thing I happen to _have _a really special gummi," said Leon. "Three is a world, outside of Hollow Bastion, that you cannot get to on a path. It's been there for centuries, and nobody knows about it. A world that technically doesn't exist. Should never have existed. The World That Never Was. It is not contained on a planet, like all the others. It can be expanded without limits. The only way to get there, is through that little beam of light right there. That's a special manmade path, created with the help of, as Axel puts it, "really special gummi" contained in this computer. It's secure, and it's safe. That's where we need to go."

Roxas was officially mindblown. This all sounded so ridiculous, like it was straight out of one of those creepy sci-fi thrillers that he and the gang used to watch on Friday nights after Olette forced them into studying.

"What!"

Leon rolled his eyes. "I'll go in first, granted if you don't follow me, I _can _come right back and drag your asses through."

Without another word, he turned away, stepped confidently into the light, and vanished faster than the blink of an eye. Roxas turned to Xion.

"What do you think of all this?" he asked her. He wasn't about to go through without his family.

"I'm gonna go," she said, "But only if you come with me." She extended her elbow, as an invitation for Roxas to link arms with her. Obviously he was incapable of holding her hand. Her midnight blue eyes pleaded with his, begging him not to leave her alone.

"Cloud?" he asked, facing his older brother. He didn't bother trying to talk to Axel. What did it matter if he came along? The redhead turned awkwardly away from them and chose to be the first to follow Leon into the light. Demyx went right after him.

"I'll go wherever you go," Cloud promised him. "I won't abandon you, squirt. Mom would kick my ass if I did." He smirked.

"Okay. Together, then," said Roxas, linking arms with both Xion and Cloud. He didn't know if they were all allowed to go through at once, but fuck it if he was gonna go through alone. Xion went first, she disappeared from his grip, and soon his arm was linked with just nothing. He shut his eyes tightly and followed her quickly, taking a leap of faith.

Travelling from world to nothing felt _weird,_ to say the least. Roxas felt as though he were being squeezed through a wringer; an intense feeling of compression traveled from his head down his feet, as though he were a bottle of toothpaste, and his feet were the cap. He didn't dare open his eyes, in fear of what he would see. He couldn't breathe. There was no air to breathe here.

_Please, don't let it last long. Give me air, please give me air, _he begged to nobody. He was unable to move, unable to scream, unable to panic, until finally-  
>He was tossed into the same computer room he'd just left, gasping for the air that had been stolen from his lungs.<p>

"What the hell?"

He looked around the room to see Xion on the ground next to him, and Axel, Demyx, and Leon standing side by side, leaning up against the wall. Seconds later, Cloud was tossed out of the light as well. Had something gone wrong?

"This is the same room we just left," he remarked, looking up at Leon.

"No, it's not," said Leon. "Look around you; it's a mirror image. It has to mimic the place it came from to create the two-way channel. This way, I can open and shut the connection from here as well as from Hollow Bastion. Now come with me, there are some people that I want you to meet. Some people who can help explain to you why you're here."

**A/N: Ha ha HA! I bet you NEVER saw that shit coming! Remember that wee note I left in chapter one? Telling y'all how you were in for something bi? THIS IS IT, BABY. And it's just the beginning :) I left you with a cliffhanger again, did you notice? All questions, comments, concerns, complaints, and death threats must be submitted in the form of a review :D**

**Also, how would y'all feel about some Zemyx?**


	10. Answers

**Holy snap, check that out! I actually updated twice in one week! –Le gasp- that never happens!**

**Okay, Dorothy, so if you're looking for Kansas *points* it's back there, like two or three chapters back. If not, buckle your seatbelt, kiddo, 'cause this shits about to get bumpy! In other words, my wonderful, beautiful, gorgeous readers, things are changing. And they ain't going back.**

**Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaand by popular vote, there will be Zemyx in this story ^^**

**Disclaimer: DUDE YOU WILL NEVER GUESS WHAT MY MOM GOT ME THIS WEEKEND—**

***door busts down and men in suits bust in* There she is! Get her!**

**-five minutes later-**

***sniffle* never mind T.T**

Now that he was out of immediate peril, it dawned on Roxas just how awkward this situation was. Axel walked with Leon; Cloud, Roxas and Xion all walked in a tight knit group, and Demyx just trailed behind them in the back, with his arms crossed. Roxas could almost feel the tension between the three of them. That is, he, Demyx, and Axel. It lingered heavily in the air.

He wondered if Demyx hated him. He didn't hate Demyx, because what had happened certainly wasn't his fault at all. He'd been left in the dark just as much as Roxas had. But being the "other boy" was a much more degrading and guilty status than the "it" boy. Roxas hadn't done anything wrong, either, but Demyx didn't necessarily know that.

The halls that Leon led them through were empty. And they echoed eerily with each footstep. If Roxas didn't know any better, he'd say they were inside a castle of sorts. Windows donned every empty, gray wall, but their purpose was unknown to Roxas. There was no visible sun, nor stars, nor a moon. Just darkness. He wondered if there was any kind of outdoors included in this place. Unlikely, as space was void of an atmosphere. How gloomy...

It was quiet now, and Roxas had a moment to think. He was here, in a place that doesn't exist, because his home was bombed, and _his girlfriend was dead._ Tears began to well up in his eyes all over again. He wondered about his other friends; about Hayner, Pence and Olette. And about his parents. Would they be safe? What if Twilight Town got bombed? He'd already lost Naminé…

"Leon," he asked in a choked voice. He knew everyone could hear his tears, he didn't care. "Are any of the other worlds in danger too?"

"Not that I'm aware of," Leon replied, "What they want is only in Hollow-well, _was _only in Hollow Bastion."

Xion gave his wrist a reassuring squeeze. "I'm sure they'll be fine, Roxas," she whispered.

Leon pushed through a set of double doors, and presented them with a small cafeteria. One of the walls was completely made of glass, showing off the nothingness all the more. There were four tables stretched across the room, but only one of them was full of people. Roxas was shocked at how many of them he knew.

Eight people were seated altogether at the table, and all eyes had been fixed on the television mounted on the wall before Leon had interrupted them. Now, all sixteen, pardon, fifteen eyes were on Roxas.

Zexion was seated among them, as well as Lexaeus. "You got him!" the young male exclaimed happily to Leon. "Huh. Got quite a few tag-alongs, don't you?"

Since when did he talk so much?

"That's enough, Zex," said a silver-haired man that Roxas recognized to be Riku, "they're obviously scared to death."

"_That's _him?" said a redheaded girl that looked shockingly similar to Naminé, "but he's like four feet tall!"

Angry chatter erupted at the table, led mainly by Riku and the redheaded girl, while the five newcomers stood awkwardly at the entrance, exchanging looks with one another. Leon leaned up against a metal column and just groaned. The din rose louder and louder until a scruffy blonde man that looked to be about Leon's age pulled a six-shooter from his back pocket and fired it towards the ceiling. The bullet just bounced right off. What was this castle made of, titanium? The loud bang that erupted through the echoing halls was enough to silence the table temporarily.

"Shut the fuck up, ya bunch o' little bitches!" he yelled in a raspy southern accent, "If y'all would just pipe down for twenty goddamn seconds and let the boss talk, maybe this crowd here wouldn't be so scared shitless!"

Honestly, Roxas was more afraid of this man than he was of any of the others. Put together, for that matter.

"Cid's right!" a brunette teenager next to Riku piped up, "At least give Leon a chance to explain to Roxas what's going on!"

With all the other traumatic and life changing events that Roxas had just experienced, he wasn't all that fazed by the brunette knowing his name, and he found himself warming up to the teen immediately.

"Thank you, Sora," said Leon, addressing said teen. "Now are we all going to have to go around the table and play name-games like first graders or can you lot shut up for long enough for me to talk to this bunch?"

An agreeable and slightly shameful murmur spread across the table, and those seated fell silent.

"Sit," Leon instructed. Roxas caught eyes with his brother, and they each nodded, as if to give the other the okay to do so. They started as a group to a table separate to the one everybody else was seated at.

Roxas sat down nervously at the very end. All of these people, they knew something, something concerning _him, _something about _him, _that he didn't know himself. Some of them even went about it _behind his back_. Even with his brother seated reassuringly next to him, he felt alone, betrayed, and put right in the spotlight. All eyes—other than Demyx's—were on him, as though they were waiting for something.

"Okay, Roxas," said Leon, seating himself beside Riku, who was closest by distance to Roxas, "What is it you'd like to know first?"

What _didn't _he want to know first?

"What is this place?" he asked, "Why is it here, why is my city being bombed, and why did you bring _me _here?"

"That's a pretty long story…" said Leon, "Are you sure you want to hear it all now? You should rest, and get your hands treated. They're probably getting infected—"

"No," said Roxas automatically, "I want to hear it now."

His hands could wait. The pain was manageable. The uncertainty, the sick feeling pooled in his stomach, that anxious feeling of not knowing a secret had built up to the point where he was about to burst—he needed to know now.

"Okay… but I'm not really sure where to start—" Leon began, but he was cut off by a deep, powerful male voice echoing through the room from the direction of the double doors they'd entered through.

"Start at the beginning," the owner said. He spoke with a ring of authority, leadership. A voice you could just _hear _the wisdom in.

Looking around to see where it came from, Roxas saw a tall figure, shrouded completely in red and black clothing. He wore an intricate black robe, and over it a deep maroon colored cape-like garment. What appeared to be an ace bandage of the same color was wrapped completely around his entire head, revealing only one bright, amber eye. Roxas could tell immediately that this man was important, from the way everybody stiffened and straightened in their seats.

"DiZ," Leon whispered.

The room was silent, until the brunette teen spoke up, "What's with the getup?" he asked lightly, meaning that obviously the man didn't always dress like that.

"I do not yet know whether or not there is a traitor among us," said DiZ, as if it were the simplest concept in the world, "That being said, it is in our best interest as a group that they do not know my face until they can be trusted, thus limiting the amount of information that could be leaked."

His voice made the hairs on the back on Roxas' neck stand up. _Wow… this shit is for real,_ he thought to himself, _Completely insane, of course, but they're all definitely taking this seriously._

"Why don't you start?" Leon suggested to DiZ. Nobody looked particularly comfortable, but they all seemed to be nodding him on.

"Very well," the old man murmured with a resigned sigh. He moved closer to the group and seated himself at an adjacent table, separate from the rest of them. He sat as close to Roxas as possible. Roxas was relieved that at least only one eye was on him now instead of dozens, regardless of how intimidating and frightening that eye may have been.

He began. "The men and women you see here make up a resistance group, called the King's Men," said DiZ, addressing Roxas.

"We formed several thousand years ago, during the Bastonian Revolution." He spoke with a strange accent; he especially put emphasis on the pronunciation of his R's. "Under King Mickey the first. Have you ever heard the legend of the three Keyblade Wielders of Light?"

Roxas shook his head. What the hell was a Keyblade?

"I have," said Xion. Roxas turned to face her in surprise.

"You have?" he questioned. She nodded solemnly, not turning her gaze to him. She stared at her feet instead.

"Would you tell the story, my dear?" DiZ asked. Apparently he disliked being on the spot and talking out loud as much as Roxas did.

"Okay…" she said, turning to face Roxas. She cleared her throat, and started to recite as though she were reading from a storybook. "The story goes that a very long time ago, an angel fell to earth. _This _earth. And that she broke her wing during the fall. A man saw her hit the ground, and he immediately wanted her beauty for himself. So he took her in, and he did his best to heal her. Over time, she began to trust him, to love him. She wanted to be with him, always. But angels couldn't stay down here, they did not belong. Soon she began to deteriorate. She still did not return to heaven, and before she disappeared completely, she gave him one last gift; her angel powers, and the secret to summoning her magical weapon called the Keyblade, so that he could protect himself and his loved ones."

"But the man was cunning. He'd tricked her. He was an evil, power-seeking man, and he wanted to use the powers he'd obtained for evil. He began to build an army, and he shared her very cells with all the soldiers. He had three special soldiers, who were stronger than the rest, as skilled with a blade as any man or woman could be. Their names were Terra, Aqua, and Ventus. When they fought as a team, even he could not defeat them. So he shared his secret with them, and gave them Keyblades of their own. With their help, he forged a special blade called the X- blade, and it was more powerful than any other. But when they found out about his plan to take over the world, they rose against him. What he didn't know, was that the Keyblade was a weapon of the light, used only to extinguish evil and do good. After many hard battles, one of the three, the eldest, sacrificed his own life, his own body, to stop him for goo. To destroy the power-drunk monster the man had become, and to restore peace to the universe."

She finished, and looked around at them all; they'd become entranced in her tale. "Was that right?" she asked timidly.

"Yes, that is how the legend goes," said DiZ, "but there's more to it than that."

Roxas cut in, "I'm sorry, but how does a bedtime story help explain to me any of this?"

"Because this legend is _real,_" Said DiZ, "It actually happened. The 'angel' in the story is actually an entity, a goddess, if you will, that we refer to as Jenova. You are familiar, I presume, with Xehanort?"

"Xehanort, sure," said Roxas irritably, "The one in our history books. Didn't he _lead _Hollow Bastion like a tyrant before the revolution?"

"Precisely. _He _is the one in the tale, the one who found Jenova. He found her, took her cells, and mass produced an army's worth of people with them. They and their descendants, they can do special things. The cells give them a tremendous amount of psychic energy."

Roxas decided to humor the man. "What kind of special things?"

"Zexion!" DiZ called sharply. The indigo-haired man rose from his seat and approached DiZ. "Show him."

"Yes, sir," he said, nodding nervously. He took a deep breath and shut his eyes, looking as though he were in deep concentration. Then suddenly, he duplicated. A second Zexion shot right out of the first, causing Demyx to jump from his place and shout in horror. The second Zexion gracefully, almost eerily so, approached Roxas. Roxas did his best to edge away, but there wasn't really anywhere to go. When the young man was an arm's length away, and leaned down and whispered, "I'm an illusion, Roxas," and disappeared as if blown away by the wind.

"Are you okay?" the real Zexion asked him, approaching cautiously, "It can be a bit unnerving at first, I know. But it wasn't real. I made it with my mind. I can make all kinds of things, anything, really."

Roxas just nodded, breathless. "So you have Jenova cells?"

"Yep," Zexion replied, sitting back down, "About half of us here do."

"Who's attacking the city?" Roxas asked suddenly, "Can someone tell me that?"

DiZ said blandly, "They call themselves Nobodies. Riku can tell you about them."

Riku stood up and moved to sit near DiZ. "I'm a direct descendant of Xehanort himself," he started, the regret shined in his bright eyes, "My brothers and I, we were raised as Nobodies. They're what's left of him. They're his followers, if you will. We, the resistance of King Mickey, have been fighting them over this soil since it all happened, because Xehanort isn't dead."

"How is he destroyed, but not dead?" Axel asked hoarsely.

"Remember how in the story, the one student—Terra, his name was—had to sacrifice his body? Well, he literally did. The three masters performed a ritual with their blades, a possession ritual. They tore Xehanort from his body and sent his could into Terra's, where they would battle; like an infection fighting a white blood cell. We don't know who won or lost, because in the midst of this battle, the Nobodies destroyed the temple. It collapsed upon all of them, crushing them. He—whoever it is that won—is still buried there, underneath the ruins past the great maw of Hollow Bastion; underneath the, well, the hollow bastion," he laughed dryly, "and it's been up to the King's Men to keep them from getting out, or being _let _out, by the Nobodies. Because the ritual was incomplete, Xehanort is neither dead nor alive. It's the Nobodies that attacked our world today, we're sure of it."

Roxas nodded for what he felt was the millionth time that day. "So let me get this straight: and angel bibbity bobbity booped Xehanort into a power hungry moron, who made an army, then his prodigy or whatever fucked him in the ass with a voodoo ritual and now he's hanging about like a zombie underneath the ruins? And now his cult's trying to undig him?"

"Pretty much," said Riku.

"But that _still _doesn't explain why Leon showed up at _my_apartment to get me!" he exclaimed, "Why carry the extra weight? Why involve _me,_ as opposed to pretty much _any _other goddamn person you know!"

"They were trying to kill _you_," said Leon, "they were targeting _you. _They went through the city and bombed every place they thought you might be."

"But _why!_"

Sora stood up and exclaimed, "Because you're the reincarnation of Ventus!"

He recoiled after receiving angry looks from both DiZ and Leon. "Sorry…" he mumbled, "I thought it'd be best to just _tell _him."

"Keep your thoughts to yourself next time," DiZ snapped.

"Sorry, I'm _what!_"

Leon slumped a bit in his seat. "I apologize, Roxas. It wasn't supposed to come out like that. But it is true, you are him. You have Jenova cells in you; you can wield a Keyblade. You were prophesized to come back, rise up, and destroy Xehanort once and for all. Once they found out who you were, they started planning to kill you, to stop the prophecy from coming true. Coincidental, isn't it? How I, merely a model, hired you to become my photographer at the base of our operations. Strange, don't you think? How mere _week _after you arrive, our cover base burns down? It's because of _you, _it's always been about you—"

"ENOUGH!" Roxas bellowed. "I am ME! Nobody else!"

DiZ stood up.

"Roxas," he stated, calmly but firmly. "You do not need to regard any of this. You may not believe us now, but in time you'll know the truth. Whether you are ready to accept that right now is irrelevant, but what _is,_ is that the only safe place for you is here," he spoke majestically, like a King. It was easy to see how he'd become Mickey's successor. Every single word was accented. "Leon, I leave you in charge of sorting out living arrangements for the new group."

With that, he stood up, and with a swish of his coat he exited the room through the doorway from which he came.

A low murmur spread across the table, particularly the end with the members of… what was it? The Resistance?

"She can share our room," piped up the redhead girl that had called Roxas short earlier. She was pointing to Xion. "I know you don't know me and Tifa well now, but you will! We're the only girls here and god knows you don't want to sleep with the boys."

Xion looked terrified. The redhead's welcoming smile faded just a tiny bit, but she pointed to herself and said, "Well, I'm Kairi. And this is Tifa," she gestured to the slightly older girl next to her. "Leon can show you our room when you're ready. Can we go?" she addressed Leon.

He nodded his head curtly, and she and Tifa rose to leave the room. "Don't worry, we're nice," Tifa supplied, "And we're sorry for your loss."

A man who had previously remained silent stood up from the far corner of the table. He had a very large build, almost as large as Lexaeus. Admittedly he was a little creepy. He had jet black dreadlocks that were surprisingly well-kept, and thick sideburns lined his square jaw.

"I'd like to be excused too, if you don't mind," he said blandly to Leon.

"Certainly, but could you do us a favor and fetch Merlin?" The scarred man asked. Even here, Leon seemed to be a boss.

"Hey, yeah, where is that crazy old coot anyway?" the southern blonde man asked loudly, "Ya sure you want 'im workin' on this lot? That wrist there's lookin purty bad," he eyed Axel's twisted forearm.

It occurred to Roxas that his fists were clenched, and that his nails had been digging into his already horridly injured palms. Though the idea of a possibly incompetent medic working on his wounds didn't excite Roxas too much, any medic would be better than none at all at this point.

"My name is Xaldin," the dreaded man offered, before following the others out of the room to find the one called Merlin.

Leon stood up from his seat and faced the five newcomers.

"How many of you are hurt?"

Axel, Roxas, and Xion raised their hands. Demyx wobbled his hand back and forth as if to say "not really."

"Only a few scratches, nothing serious," he said passively, "I'll be alright."

"I'm fine," said Cloud, "Just shaken, is all."

He didn't appear to be shaken at all, but that's just how Cloud was. Leon regarded him curiously for a moment, then moved on to Xion, who looked to be in the best condition out of the injured folks.

"Your ankle, right?" he asked.

"I think it might be broken," she supplied.

Zexion stood up from his seat, with Lexaeus trailing close behind him. "Lex and I don't mind sharing a room with somebody," he said, "I know there's only one free room, so one of you can come with us. There's a cot in our closet, I think."

"I'll go," said Demyx immediately. Roxas could understand why; he would _hate _to be in Demyx's position and end up stuck in a room with Axel. In fact, he'd hate to be stuck in his own position and end up stuck in a room with Axel. Unless… unless he and Demyx had gotten back together? Roxas wasn't sure what happened between them after he left the apartment. What was Demyx even _doing _here?

Zexion offered his hand for Demyx to shake, "My name is Zexion," he offered warmly, even though DiZ had very obviously called his name out already, "And this is my brother, Lexaeus."

"It's nice to meet you," said Lexaeus in a deep baritone, those five words possibly being the most that Roxas had even heard him speak at one time.

"Hey," said Demyx anxiously, shaking Zexion's hand, "I-I guess I'll just go with… with you guys?" He said it like it was a question, though there wasn't really anybody to verify it for him. He wasn't asking Axel for permission, in fact he seemed to be extremely interested in looking at the floor, and _not _Axel. That was a good sign, right?

_No, _Roxas thought to himself, _That is absolutely not a good sign, because I don't care what Axel does, or who. He can go play with whomever the hell he pleases, not my problem. I don't want anything to do with him. I don't care. I don't care… I don't care._

"Follow me," said Zexion, leading Demyx away from the group, leaving only Riku, Sora, and that scary blonde guy in the room with them and Leon.

"Well then I guess that settles it," said Leon, "It's not broken, by the way," he added to Xion, "Just sprained. Anyway, you three can take the free room. It might be a bit cramped; we weren't expecting so many extra people."

Roxas' heart sank. What if it had been just him that Leon had rescued? He should probably consider himself very lucky to have his brother with him. And Xion, even though they'd never really been particularly close before. He only knew her really because of Naminé.

"Oh, God, Naminé…" he whispered. Maybe they did hear him, maybe they didn't. Maybe all eyes were on him, he didn't care. He wasn't looking at any of them. His hands were fisted again, and it hurt. White hot tears streamed from his eyes, down his face. Maybe he was sobbing. His chest hurt, so he probably was. A warm hand ghosted over his clenched fist, was it her? Stupid to think, of course it wasn't her. But he had to be sure. He looked up…

"You're going to hurt yourself." Axel. It was Axel in front of him. Axel, who'd betrayed him and broken his heart, had the audacity to touch him while he was crying over his dead girlfriend?

"Don't," he hissed, and Axel retracted immediately. Roxas tried to stand up to leave—where the hell would he have gone, anyway? Somewhere away. Somewhere he could cry by himself, where people weren't shoving fairy tales down his throat and telling him what he was supposed to be. Maybe he'd go back the way he came. Back to find Naminé, in the rubble of their old home, where he could go die properly with her, and all of this would go away.

But alas, the world began to swim, and he became very light-headed. The stench of coppery blood stung inside his nose, making him very nauseas. He could feel the trickling crimson substance flowing from his wounds again, and he was becoming increasingly away of the sound of it dripping on the floor.

_Drip, drip, drip…_ the sounds echoed through his hears, and everything started shifting out of focus. The edge of his sight became blurry, and the room started rocking, back and forth, back and forth. It all became too much for him to bear. He barely made it two steps before he fell to his knees, vomited on the floor, and let everything go black.

"Hey, hey guys! I think we got him! Roxas? Roxas, can you hear me?"

_No. No I do not. Go away._ He didn't want to open his eyes yet. _I see what you're doing, sneaky. You're flashing those stupid lights in my face and talking real loud. Whyyy, why do you need me to get up?_

His thoughts made no sense and he knew it. So, rather unwillingly, he cracked his eyes open to try to find the owner of the voice, so he could glare at him.

What he saw was a man who looked like he might be older than Roxas' Kodak Brownie. His crooked nose was the size of a tomato, his eyebrows curled out even farther than said nose, and he had wrinkles underneath his wrinkles. The geezer breathed out a sigh of relief, revealing an incomplete row of yellowing teeth. Gross.

"He's up!" said the man, followed by a consecutive sigh of relief from several other voices.

Roxas looked around the unfamiliar room. Aside from the bed he found himself lying in, there was another bunk bed, a dresser, a wardrobe, and a work desk. Sitting on the bottom bunk was Cloud, who was hunched over with his fingers interlocked, and on the swivel chair near the desk Axel was perched, staring intently at Roxas with eyes full of worry. Leon was present also, pressed against the wooden doorframe.

"What happened?" Roxas asked. He didn't mean that, specifically, because obviously he'd fainted. It was like when people woke up and asked "where am I?" even though it couldn't be clearer that they were in a hospital. No, what he'd meant was what happened between the time he'd passed out and the present. Why was he in this room, who was this old fart crouched over his bed?

"You passed out," Leon informed him. _No shit, Einstein. _"And Merlin here did what he could to fix you up."

"That's right," said the old guy that must be Merlin, "gave us quite a scare, you did. I did what I could to fix your hands, but you probably won't gain full use of them for a solid month or so. Maybe more."

Looking down, Roxas could see that his hands were indeed heavily bandaged. Experimentally, he tried flexing them, but they didn't move. Either they were numbed my medication or they were molded into place. Shit, this was going to suck.

"Thanks," he croaked. Why couldn't they all just leave him alone?

Merlin straightened up, adjusted his round spectacles, and turned to leave. "If anything else is bothering you, Axel and Cloud both know where my room is."

With that, he and Leon both left the room, leaving him alone with his brother and the redhead.

"What happened?" Cloud asked him seriously. "One minute you were fine, and the next you were hyperventilating and crying." _He didn't know._

"Naminé is dead," Roxas said stoically. Cloud and Axel both blanched.

"But she was out… out shopping…" Cloud began to argue.

"She got back," said Roxas miserably, "She got back before all the shit started. Then Xion came in and told us things were blowing up, then the building got hit and sh-she… she didn't make it"

Surely he hadn't cried this much in one day since he was a small child. But just when he thought he'd run out of tears, there they were again, flowing shamelessly. He didn't even _deserve _to cry. He'd _betrayed _her. And for what? The selfish, insensitive redhead that was sitting over there… crying?

Yes, he was definitely crying. Albeit he wasn't doing it very loudly or noticeably, the tears were definitely there. His eyes were bloodshot, and two itty bitty tears were sliding gracefully down his perfectly angled cheekbones, leaving a glistening track in their wake.

"Oh, gosh, I'm so sorry, kid," said Cloud, crossing the room to do something very strange and Un-Cloud-like. He brushed away his bangs and kissed Roxas on the forehead. Looking his brother in the eyes, Roxas could see pity and misery, and that he was holding back tears as well. "I'm really—" he sniffled noticeably, "gonna miss that girl."

"I'm sorry," said Axel pointedly, gaining the attention of both Cloud and Roxas, "for your loss. I-I didn't know her well, but I know she was really special."

"Who the hell are you?" Cloud inquired grouchily.

"Name's Axel," the redhead grunted, looking back at the floor, "What about _you,_ Cloud? Let me guess, you're actually some kind of spy instead of a bartender?"

Roxas wasn't even going to bother asking how it was Axel knew Cloud; he was much too tired to care, and much too angry at Axel to swallow his pride and ask.

"Nope," Cloud deadpanned, flopping back down onto his bunk and settling into the sheets, "In case the obvious resemblance in appearance and personality wasn't a big enough hint for you, I'm the kid's brother. Now, other than the fact that he's clearly pissed at you for some reason or another, and that you like to bum cigarettes off of people, is there anything _I _should know about _you?"_

Wait, Axel smokes? Roxas had never seen him smoke before, nor did he ever smell of tobacco. It seems that Demyx wasn't the only thing he'd lied about.

"Nah," said Axel bluntly, "I'm boring. Speaking of which, you got any smokes on you?"

Cloud gave him a look as if to say "Are you fucking serious? Right now?" but then shrugged nonetheless. He pulled from his pocket a pack of shorts.

"Here," he said emotionlessly, tossing one and a lighter over to Axel.

Roxas really didn't want to fall back asleep, because already they'd been talking about him like he wasn't there, who knew what kind of things he'd miss if he fell asleep? But sleep was really starting to overtake him; they probably had him seriously medicated, and cigarette smoke had always made his mind go fuzzy and hazy. It was becoming a struggle to hold his eyes open. He was beginning to lose his sense of being; he didn't know how much time had passed before somebody talked again.

"Hey," said Cloud, snapping Roxas out of whatever sleep he actually may have been experiencing. When had he closed his eyes, anyway? Seconds ago? Hours ago? Surely Cloud wasn't talking to him, since Axel grunted a response. The smell of smoke lingered in the room, but Roxas couldn't tell if a cigarette was still lit.

"I don't, specifically, know what's going on between you two," he heard Cloud say, "But the last I heard about it, he seemed to believe that you cared about him. 'S that true?"

Axel didn't even take a second to think about his answer. There wasn't a bit of hesitation, not a falter, not a stutter, not a waver.

"Yeah. I do."

It was a curious thing, meeting the parents. Not that Cloud was a parent, but he carried the demeanor of one. He was obviously asking him all these things on Roxas' behalf. Admittedly, Axel was very nervous. It Cloud was anything like his brother, it was clear that Axel would have to watch what he said, because even though Roxas was too small to beat him up, Cloud sure wasn't.

"Probably a lot more than he does me," he added quietly. Next, surely, he would be asked what he had done to make Roxas angry with him in the first place, and then he'd have to tell the truth, and then certainly Cloud would _not _approve of him after that.

The older blonde glance over to his little brother's sleeping form, "I wouldn't be so sure of that," he said thoughtfully, "Just this morning he had his panties up in a bunch, because he's practically head over heels for you." He smirked, "Don't tell him I told you that, though. He'd never admit it, 'specially since his girl's gone…"

A tense moment of silence passed between them. Things were certainly complicated for everyone, now. On top of being "outed" about Demyx in a way he absolutely didn't find preferable, Naminé was dead now. And while Roxas had told him that he didn't love her anymore, he'd obviously lost someone very dear to him. And Axel, of all people, knew all the symptoms of the mourning stage.

"I let him down, Cloud," said Axel. He wasn't sure exactly why he was coming out with this, because Cloud probably didn't care to hear his pathetic story, "I had a boyfriend, and I just let things go on until it was too late. I was a goddamn coward, and now he's probably going to hate me forever."

He tensed in his chair, waiting for the blow. It never came.

"Well," said Cloud, "Congratu-fucking-lations, that makes you even _more _of a dumbass than him," he jabbed a thumb in Roxas' direction, "But behind that stubborn-as-fuck shell, he's a big softie. I give it a week or two before he comes around and starts talking to you again."

"Yeah?" said Axel hopefully. Two weeks wasn't that bad.

"Yeah, but if you even _think_ about pulling shit like that again, I _will _kick your ass," he said in a big boy voice.

"Okay," said Axel, hiding a smile. Suddenly it occurred to him that he'd made his decision. Oh.

Cloud shuffled around until he'd managed to cover most of his body with the blanket he'd been provided. "I doubt I'll be able to sleep through all of this shit, but I'm gonna try. Get the light, please?"

"Sure," said Axel in a monotonous voice. He rose from his chair slowly, taking extra care not to hit his broken wrist on anything. Thankfully it was his left wrist, and it didn't hurt too much unless he clumsily whacked it against something, which had already happened twice since he got the damn cast on.

Immediately after getting into bed, he decided that Cloud was a bastard. Climbing onto the top bunk with a cast on was hard enough, but doing it while being nearly six and a half feet tall was next to _impossible._ He hit his head on the ceiling, twice. Dick.

"I get the bottom bunk tomorrow," he hissed. He knew that Cloud definitely could not be asleep yet.

"Never thought _you _were the type to bottom, _Axel,"_ said Cloud, the smirk practically dripping from his voice.

"Ha ha. Goodnight Cloud."

He did not receive a reply from the bottom bunk, he simply heard the man shuffling about.

"Goodnight Roxas," he uttered under his breath, even though he knew Roxas wouldn't hear him.

To the surprise of both himself and Cloud, Roxas mumbled, "Mrmph Assel."

Whether he was attempting to say, "Shut up, asshole," or, "Goodnight, Axel," he didn't know, but honestly he was pleased to have gotten any response whatsoever.

In the quiet of the night, Axel actually had the time and silence in which he could think. There was so much to go process, like the fact that his home, and probably several people that he knew, were gone; that he was in a place that technically never existed. The events the day reeled through his mind over and over again. After thinking them through so many times, he began to doubt that they even happened. The memories were so fuzzy in his exhausted mind that he was starting to doubt they even happened. He had to open his eyes periodically just to be sure that he wasn't at home, curled up next to Demyx; or he had to poke at his cast to be sure that he really did have a broken wrist.

No matter had many other things may have happened that day, his mind invariably traced every stream of thoughts back to Roxas.

…_but none of that explains what __**Saïx **__of all people was doing there. And that __**thing!**__ And it was all for what, a picture of Roxas? Why Roxas? Poor Roxas… I hope he'll be okay…_

…_maybe that Yuffie girl drugged my drink and now I'm on some kind of psychedelic trip. Never been on one before, do these things normally happen? Nah, if this were a hallucination, Roxas probably wouldn't be wearing anything._

…_and shit, man, Demyx is right down the hall. This is gonna be so awkward now, especially if I end up dating Roxas eventually. There will __**be**__ an eventually…right?_

…_can't believe that she's dead. She was such a sweet little girl; no wonder Roxas hates me…_

_I wonder if he heard me talking to Cloud earlier. Part of me really hopes he did, just so he'd know I'm serious about him. But fuck, that still doesn't atone for what I've done._

Gradually Axel ran out of Roxas-related things to think about, after he'd gone through pretty much every memory he had between the time he met Roxas to the present. The last thing he could remember before he finally let sleep take him was the sound of a coffee grinder somewhere within the depths of the castle.

**Okay, guys, I promise to be nice to Axel and Roxas from now on. Well… maybe not. Not INDIVIDUALLY, but as a pair. Yeah. Yeah, let's go with that. As a couple, things are gonna get better. I'll leave you to chew on that while I devise a new chapter. Also, I did that thing again where I was in such a rush to get this up, that I didn't edit it :/ so it's probably full of errors again, and holes and things like that. I don't mean to mistreat you guys, I'm just SO IMPATIENT.**

**REVIEW! Please oh please oh please oh please review for me, I really want to hear what you guys are thinking of all of this. I never played BBS or FFVII, so I don't know in what ways the story is canon in comparison to the games. Not that I care, I just wanna make sure it's flowing nicely. PLEASE tell me what you think! *blows kisses* thank you :')**


	11. The Pull

**HAI! Yeah, I know, you probably all hate me now, 'cause I've been so so so neglectful T.T such a short chappie too... but I think you'll like it! Lots of meaningful stuff in here, guys, and I think I'm being a wee bit nicer to Axel and Roxas. Well... yeah. Let's go with that.**

**Disclaimer: Funny story, that! See, once upon a time, I was hopping down the old mill road, and-**

***Roxas interrupts* She still doesn't own Kingdom Hearts, guys.**

"Roxas! Roxy Roxy Roxyyyy! Wake UP!"

Axel yelped and bolted upright at the sudden intrusion, resulting in a rather rude awakening as he bashed his head against the ceiling.

Another female voice, one much calmer, floated into the room directly after the first. It said, "I'm so sorry, I couldn't keep her out."

Looking over the edge of the bunk bed he'd forgotten he'd been laying in, Axel could see Tifa, the brunette girl from the day before. She stood in the doorway with a sheepish expression on her face, along with a familiar dark blur that Axel could only identify as Xion's dark, cropped hair. He groaned loudly and let his head fall back onto the pillows, massaging the spot where he'd bumped it. If this was how he'd be waking up every morning, the living room was starting to sound like a good idea. If there even _was _a living room…

"Xion, what the fuck are you doing in here?" Cloud growled angrily from down below, "It's not even dawn yet!"

"Actually, it's ten a.m.," said Xion in a matter-of-fact tone, "but we don't have an atmosphere here, apparently, so you can't see the sun, 'cause it's hiding behind Hollow Bastion."

"No sun?" Roxas mumbled, finally coming to, "Ever? Bet the electric bill's through the roof," he laughed weakly.

Axel was already beginning to dislike this place. If the nights consisted of not sleeping, and the mornings consisted of a wild Xion and no sunrise, he didn't even want to imagine what the days were like.

"There's coffee and breakfast in the cafeteria," Tifa offered, "After you've eaten we can see about getting you all some fresh clothes."

Axel liked this woman. Breakfast and clothes sounded like a _marvelous _idea. He sat up and, once again, forgot just how tall he was and hit his head up against the ceiling. Feeling just about ready to give up, he snarled, "I'm serious, Cloud. I get bottom tomorrow!" to the snickering blonde.

"That's what she said," Xion whispered under her breath. Tifa rolled her eyes, hiding a smile, and even Roxas offered a half-assed snort.

"Tally ho," said Axel sarcastically, sliding off of his bunk gracefully to avoid climbing the ladder with a bum arm. He landed right next to Roxas' bed, where currently the younger blonde was sitting up and trying to get a bit of crusty sleep from his eyes off of his cheeks. Given the heavy amount of bandages covering his fingers, it wasn't an easy task.

"I got it," Axel said happily, wiping the crusty substance away easily with his thumb, "Good morning, sunshine," he added, flashing Roxas his most charming smile.

"Fuck off, I got this," Roxas snapped angrily, whipping the covers off of him with his elbow.

Axel watched the pitiful efforts. What would happen, he wondered, when Roxas would need to feed himself? Bathe himself? He knew how stubborn the blonde could be, and was certain that he would fight tooth and nail to do it all himself. Well, it couldn't be said that Roxas didn't have reason to be angry at the world.

"Come on, come on!" said Tifa, motioning for them to follow her, "The others all really want to get to know you!"

Others? _Oh right, the table of crazies, _Axel thought to himself. He slipped his hands in his pockets as he began to follow Tifa out of the door and he felt something thin and stiff brush against his hand. _The photos!_ He grasped it slightly, deciding to keep it on him from then on.

The two brothers reluctantly followed Tifa and Axel out of the room that was now familiar to them. Axel vaguely recognized some of the hallways and "intersections" she took them through from yesterday, but at the time he'd really been too focused on a certain unconscious Roxas to bother trying to memorize any of them.

"Here we are," she said warmly, "I think Demyx, Zexion and Lexaeus already left."

_Thank goodness for that,_ Axel thought to himself. He caught Roxas' eye and immediately knew he was thinking the same thing, even if he _was _angry with Axel. The blonde immediately looked away and refused to meet eyes with him again.

Upon entering the wide cafeteria, Axel could see Riku, the girl Xion had stayed with, and the boy whose name he thought was Sora. The boy looked to be about Roxas' age, maybe a bit older. In fact, he looked quite similar to Roxas. He bore something of an exotic look; his tanned skin in comparison to the two pale ones next to him gave him a healthy glow. He had laugh lines forming on his face already, and his milk chocolate brown hair fell in a similar way to Roxas': in messy spikes, everywhere. When his megawatt blue eyes fell upon the newcomers, his face lit up like a light bulb.

"Hey guys!" he called cheerfully, leaping up from his seat and dashing over to the group, "Did you sleep?"

Everyone but Roxas shook their heads.

"Oh… sorry to hear that," he responded, "I'm Sora, by the way, in case you didn't know… _COME ON, GUYS, WHERE ARE YOUR MANNERS!"_ He'd bellowed the last bit toward his two friends, who were still seated at the table. They exchanged looks before standing from their bench to approach the rest of them.

The redhead spoke up first, "Well, as you know already, I'm Kairi," she said shyly, twirling a strand of wine-colored hair nervously between her fingers.

"And this is Riku!" Sora exclaimed, introducing the silverette for him.

"Nice to see you again," he greeted Axel and Roxas, "And I'm pretty sure I know my own name, Sor," he added amusedly to Sora.

Riku was rather exotic looking too. His white bangs, though long and in need of cutting, did nothing to cover up his bright turquoise, almond-shaped eyes. He wore a white tank top, which showed off impressively toned arms. He rivaled Axel with his good looks, though his face was not quite as striking. He was the quiet kind of beautiful.

"You said you were with the nobodies?" Xion asked pointedly, eyeing him distrustfully.

"I was," he replied with ease, "I was born with very powerful Jenova cells, as a direct descendant of Xehanort and Jenova themselves. A remnant of a god, if you will. I was raised as part of an elite team of nobodies with my four brothers."

"Why the change of heart?" she asked coldly, not dropping her guard. Since when did Xion become so hostile?

Riku seemed to notice this, and he shuffled nervously, "Well, they sent me here, on a raid once," he explained, "It was my task to collect the manufactured Jenova materia that they'd—well, _we'd_ gotten our hands on. Anyway, I broke in, and _this _little punk," he ruffled Sora's hair affectionately, "Was on guard duty that night. Not that he put up much of a fight; he was just sleeping there, like a log. But I couldn't bring myself to leave him. He was _the _one. He was mine, and I was his."

Roxas snorted. "Just like that?"

Sora bonked himself on the head. "Oh, right! I forgot, no one explained the pull factor to you guys!"

"Pull?" Axel asked, thoroughly confused. Why did the term sound so familiar?

"Hmm… how to explain this…" Sora pondered, chewing on his lip. "Remember yesterday, how we were telling you how you're a reincarnation, Roxas?"

Roxas nodded his head stiffly, carrying a look of distaste. Sora looked apologetically at him and continued.

"Well, it goes by bloodline, so every fifty or so generations, the soul is thrown back into the world," he explained, "At least, that's what we think… could we sit down now? Xaldin's got breakfast on the counter over there," he pointed to a tray of scrambled eggs, a plate of toast, and a coffee pot.

They all helped themselves, save for Roxas (who Axel grabbed some extra toast for) and sat down at a table with Cloud and Tifa, who'd left before them to get settled. Roxas stared pointedly down at the table, at which point Axel silently offered him some toast. He accepted somewhat reluctantly, holding the bread in a very awkward way as he attempted to eat it by himself. Too afraid to offer to help, Axel let him be like that.

"So, anyway," Sora began again, "Back in those times, everyone was like, indigenous, you know? They were all into voodoo and rituals and spiritual journeys and shit like that."

Sora talked very animatedly, his hands moved as he talked, and so did his eyebrows, for some reason or another.

"Okay so when two people were married, or joined—whatever they called it, the chief of the tribe, and the shaman of the tribe, conjunctively, would perform a binding ritual on the two. According to the stories, and from old murals and stuff, if one partner was ever unfaithful after the spell, they would both die." The brunette shrugged his shoulder, "Whether that part's true or not, we don't know, but we've studied records of these bindings and cross referenced it with our heritage, and it seemingly fits with the phenomena that we call, 'The Pull.'"

"Which is?" Roxas asked skeptically. Suddenly Axel remembered:

"_Yes, Lexy? What is it?"_

"_Pull?" Lexaeus asked questioningly, his head cocked to the side like a curious puppy._

"_Yes, I think so," said Zexion in a reassuring tone of voice, giving his older brother a gentle pat on the shoulder. Lexaeus turned back around and smiled to himself. Axel and Roxas exchanged looks at the odd conversation that had taken place._

"_What's that about?" Axel asked._

"_Don't worry about it," said Zexion indifferently._

What, though, had they been referring to?

"It's the idea that the binding was permanent. That even in our re-occurring life cycles, the souls of those who had been put under the spell would remain bound to one another. No matter what you do about it, what you do to prevent it, once you've found that person, that's it. Their aura, designed specifically for you, 'pulls' you in. You're destined to be together, forever," Sora said, smiling dreamily.

"And as you can see," Riku added, wrapping his arm around Sora's shoulders and pulling him into a playful hug, "Age, gender, and any other previous allegiances are at the mercy of the pull. I was as hardcore as they got; bloodthirsty, savage, and lethal. But all of that was changed, was _forced _to change, by him. DiZ knew of the studies conducted by our former leaders, and he agreed to let me stay under those terms. He knew that I'd betrayed the nobodies, and that I'd be put to death if I ever went back."

"Thank goodness for that," Sora laughed, "because I would have been in _huge _shit if I'd let you get ahold of that materia."

"So let me get this straight," Roxas interrupted, "You're saying that according to these stories, you fall in love once and you die if you go with _anyone _besides your accursed beloved?" he asked sarcastically. He must not have been buying it either.

"Well, that's why we're not one hundred percent sure if the two are really related, 'cause I was dating Kairi when Riku swung into town," said Sora. "Straight as a rod, I was. Sorry, Kai," he added to his red haired friend.

She shrugged, "It's all water under the bridge now."

"Oh yeah, speaking of straight, funny thing that!" Sora continued, "Obviously, gays weren't allowed back then, I think they fed them to like, leeches or something… Anyway! That means that one of us was originally a chick!" he laughed as though it was the funniest thing in the world, "What do you guys think? I'm betting it's Riku. Seriously, look at his hair!"

"I can _cut _my hair, Sora," Riku reminded him.

"Yeah, but still!"

Axel didn't like this. Not at all. All of this fell strictly into his category of 'does not happen.' What was even more uncomfortable was that what Sora and Riku were describing seemed bone-chillingly accurate to what Axel had been feeling lately regarding Roxas. Everything from his job to his thriving relationship had been against it, yet he'd still found himself falling hard and fast for Roxas.

But that was all _his _fault. It wasn't fair to blame some bullshit hocus pocus on _his _issues. That wasn't fair to Roxas, Demyx, Naminé, or even to himself, for that matter. Given the choice, wouldn't he choose to have never met Roxas? It's what he _should _choose. If it weren't for the little towhead, he'd be happily celebrating his non fatherhood with Demyx right now. Well, given the current state of Hollow Bastion, he'd actually probably be lying in a pile of rubble right now, but with Demyx nonetheless. The last month of his life would not have gone to shit and he could've died happily with his lover in his arms. But yet, after all that, he could not bring himself to resent Roxas.

"Are you guys the only ones around here that are 'bonded?'" Roxas asked.

Sora and Riku exchanged knowing looks. "We've met a pair," said Sora, shrugging, "But we don't know them very well."

An awkward silence settled over them, in which the only sounds between them were the clinking of silverware and chewing.

"Good morning," a deep voice greeted after a few minutes of silence. Axel craned his head around to see the man with dreadlocks approaching them. Xaldin, Axel recalled his name was. He was wearing an apron and a hairnet, and he was carrying his own tray of food.

"Hey, Xaldin," said Tifa, smiling warmly and scooting closer to Cloud to make room for him.

Xaldin tugged his dreads out of the hairnet and tossed it onto a separate table. "The thing about being the chef, is that you always eat last," he sighed, digging into his breakfast.

"What do you guys do all day?" Axel inquired suddenly, "I mean, you're telling us all of these stories about things that _have _happened, years ago. What about now? I know _you _claimed to be from Oathkeeper," he pointed towards Riku, "and _you're _the chef," he motioned to Xaldin, "What about the rest of you? Do you live here?"

"Well, first off, I am _not _from Oathkeeper," said Riku, flashing him an evil smirk, "We came to investigate the area around the falls, because we detected some enemy activity around there."

"Wait… if you're not from Oathkeeper, then who was my last paycheck from?" Axel asked, confused.

There goes the evil smile again. "You think you're the only one that picked up a couple of diamonds on your way out?"

What a smart little fucker.

Riku continued, "Anyway, to answer your question, yeah some of us do live here. I do, and Sora does. We all have rooms here, but Lex and Zex used to live in the city. So did Leon. Kairi tends to switch a lot, but we don't really have much of a choice anymore, it's either live here or die, now.

"What about DiZ?" Axel interrupted suddenly, "What's the deal with him?"

The table went silent.

"Well, we don't really know much about him..." Sora began.

"Leon is the only one he really talks to," Kairi chimed in, "because he's second in command. All of our orders come from DiZ, but we hardly ever see him. I mean, I can count the times I've seen him on one hand, and I was _born _into the resistance."

"I've only seen him twice, not including yesterday," said Sora, "Once when I got in trouble because of Riku, and when I first came here. I used to live on Destiny Islands with my dad, 'cause he got stationed there. When I got old enough, he sent me out here to get trained, 'cause I got the cells too. But, see, the problem is, we're not the only ones that put our people all over the world. The nobodies send they're people around too. They caught on to who he was, and they shot 'im," he sniffled noticeably, "Shot 'im dead."

"My parents died too," said Axel gravely, laying his hand over Sora's, "When I was eighteen... I know how bad it hurts, even now."

Sora blinked and shook his head to himself, "A-Anyway," he cleared his throat, "We don't really hear from DiZ. He stays in his study, and only comes out when something really, really big happens."

"And the bandages?"

"I've never seen them on him before."

_Stranger and stranger,_ Axel thought to himself. _How can they all work under him when they don't even know him? How can they ever have trust? _

"Axel?" said Roxas uncertainly.

_Hey, that's me! _Axel thought triumphantly, _he's addressing me and it's not to screech, yell at, and/or threaten!_

"Yeah?" he gulped nervously. Who knew what the blonde would say? How lame is it that he could make Axel's heart beat so profusely when he wasn't even doing anything? He was just sitting there, head down, shoulders down, his beautiful blue eyes staring down at the table, refusing to meet his.

"How did your parents die? You talked about them once, but you never said anything..." he said softly. He looked so miserable, Axel just wanted to hug him, even though _he _had been the one to lose his family.

"Back a couple of years ago, I don't know if you were over here yet," Axel began, "You know the gummi hangar on the really far edge of the city? I don't know if anyone ever uses it to get to and from Twilight Town. Anyway, back a couple of years ago, it came down. Big, big accident. They don't know how or why it happened, forensics couldn't find any signs of bombs... but they were inside, w-when it happened." He cleared his throat nervously.

"Oh snap! They were there!" Sora exclaimed, "I remember when that happened! That was the same shit they used to attack the city!" Axel didn't need to ask who 'they' were. "We lost Ariel and Eric there! They were our best engineers... We'd just sent their poor kid to Midgar too..."

Axel's brain skidding to a screeching halt. 'Did you just say Ariel and Eric?"

"Hmm?" said Sora, "Oh. Yeah, Ariel and Eric Sinclair. They had kids too... Reno, I went through psyche training with him, and, uhh... hmm. Was it Alex, Riku?"

Riku shrugged, "I don't remember details like you, Sor."

Roxas' mouth fell open into an almost comical O, as he slowly began to understand what was happening. The other members of the table began to speculate on what the kid's name might have been, and Roxas, finally, met Axel's eyes, giving him a hesitant, but understanding look.

"The kid's name..." Axel started quietly, "was _Axel. _Axel Sinclair."

He was suddenly filled to the brim with a burning rage. Rage for Leon, for Reno, and everyone else around him. For everyone who'd kept it from him this whole time. He felt so _betrayed,_ and isolated. Why did nobody understand?

Sora seemed to be the only one to notice Axel's instability, as everyone else was still just in shock. He quickly interjected, "I'm sure they were only trying to protect—"

"AM I THE ONLY DAMN PERSON IN MY LIFE THAT'S BEEN LEFT IN THE DARK THIS WHOLE TIME?" he exploded. Saïx had always known, his brother had always known, Leon always knew, and nobody took a spare moment to tell him? "Never breathed a _word,_" he hissed, probably incoherently, "Not any of them..."

Nobody seemed to know what to say. Sora was actually crying silently now, poor thing, and Riku had his arms around him, giving Axel a disdainful look. Tifa looked at her knees shamefully as though it were all her fault, and Cloud and Xaldin were tastefully looking away. Xion and Roxas kept their eyes on him, as did Kairi, who was chewing on her lip. She looked as though she were holding back tears.

"A-Ariel was my auntie, Axel," she said, sniffling. The girl who apparently was his long lost cousin stood from her bench, crossed to the other side of the table, and embraced him, "They used to talk about you," she whispered," It's nice to meet you."

It was strange, being wrapped in her tiny arms. Axel had never really been hugged by a woman before, aside from his mother. Kairi reminded him of her. She held him soothingly, and protectively; he found himself returning her hug.

"It's nice to meet you too..." he mumbled.

"They were good people," said Sora, sniffling.

"Yeah," said Axel monotonously, "They were."

Kairi let him go and he sat down on his bench. He felt ashamed of himself for his earlier outburst. He was never one to lash out irrationally; in fact often he prided himself in his ability to keep his composure. He knew that once he got into something, once he was set off, it was impossible to head him off. So he'd trained himself long ago in the art of keeping a poker face.

"I'm sorry," he said, staring down at his knuckles, "for screaming at you all. It wasn't your fault."

"Are you kidding!" Sora asked incredulously, with tear streaks still staining his face, "You're perfectly justified in being upset! If it were me, I'd be _pissed._"

Sora was a weird one, Axel concluded. He'd gotten worked up to the point of _crying _when Axel started screaming, yet _he _was the one defending him _for_ the screaming. It reminded him of Demyx...

"In my defense, I did _not _know any more about this than you ever did," said Roxas pointedly.

"I know that," said Axel, "but I got a bone to pick with Leon. And my brother. Is there a phone in this place?" he asked Riku.

Riku shook his head. "No. I have a satellite phone, but we don't have any kind of signal here. Leon and myself are going to the city today to collect Naminé's body. If you want to come along you can. You can sort out any affairs you have in the outside world, and collect any kind of belongings that might have been left behind. If you don't _want _to stay here, obviously you don't have to, but it _is _dangerous out there. The city is in a state of ruin, it's gonna take years to restore it."

"I'll stay," said Axel dryly," I have nowhere else to go."

Riku's tone changed from formal and businesslike to something more human, like he was talking to a friend. "Friends? Relatives?"

"Nobody," Axel repeated, staring at the floor, "My brother, _Reno, _is still in Midgar, as your boss knows. But that place is at war anyway. Staying in the castle would be my best bet, assuming that I'm welcome."

"Of _course _you're welcome!" Kairi exclaimed, "You're family, Axel. I know we don't know each other very well, but I'd never just abandon you."

Axel smiled weakly at her. She, basically, was all he had here. Demyx was gone; surely he wanted nothing to do with him anymore. And Roxas? It was hard to say. He was angry, no doubt, but they seemed to be somewhat on speaking terms. Trying to work out a relationship was the last thing he should be worrying about, and he knew that. But if he still had a chance, fuck if he wasn't going to jump all over it.

"Are either of you going to come with us?" Riku asked, addressing Roxas and Xion, "Since you two knew her, it'd be best if we had somebody to identify the body."

Roxas shook his head immediately. "No," he said quickly, "I-I can't. I'm sorry."

"I want to stay here with Roxas," said Xion gravely, "I don't think I can either..."

Riku nodded. "I understand. Did you know her, Axel?"

"Not _well,_" Axel replied, "But well enough to be able to identify her."

"We'll leave in a few hours, then, after you've gotten cleaned up and dressed. I have some clothes that I think will fit you, and Roxas looks to be about Sora's size I think."

Sora flashed them a great big smile. "Yep! Pretty close!" he said, "Sharing is caring!"

"Okay, thanks," said Axel gratefully, realizing at the same time how uncomfortable his dirty clothes were. They were stiff from the dirt dried in with sweat and blood; not to mention they were practically ripped to shreds. He probably looked disgusting.

Riku took Sora's hand and began to walk away. A low murmur buzzed across the table again; Cloud and Tifa had struck up a new conversation, as had Kairi and Xion.

"Do you hate me?" Axel blurted suddenly to Roxas. He hadn't meant to ask, but it was killing him, not knowing. Was it even worth trying to make a new life here with both Roxas and Demyx hating him?

"I don't know," said Roxas bluntly, looking at him directly, for once. "I'm definitely _mad _at you, furious in fact. But I don't think I'm going to go as far as to say I hate you. I don't know what you hope to achieve by talking to me, though."

Axel swallowed. "I know I fucked up, but I'm just trying to do right by you."

"You _can't _do right by me!" Roxas screamed angrily, gaining the attention of everyone at the table once again, "There's just some shit that you _can't take back! _Just—rrgh! I never—never even got to _tell _her, and now she's _dead. _Dead! I-don't even h-have a _chance _to ever see her again! Don't you understand!"

He was standing up now, for the first time, towering over Axel. His face was bright red, with fat, angry tears streaming down it. Axel had never seen him get so angry; he was actually _shaking _with rage and slamming his injured fists down onto the hard plastic.

"Okay, I'm sorry, please calm down," Axel begged desperately, getting rather upset himself. He tried to grip Roxas' arm, but he tore himself away as though he'd been burned.

"Don't touch me!" he snapped. He stared Axel down, with angry, watery eyes. His facial expression was so hard, and tense. He looked like he was trying so hard to keep it together. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to prevent the tears from escaping. Then suddenly, he cracked. He started sobbing uncontrollably and slammed himself into Axel. With one arm he halfheartedly packed punches to Axel's shoulder, and the other arm was wound tightly around the redhead's upper body. Axel was at a loss for what to do. Was he supposed to try and comfort him? The reaction he was getting was absolutely not the one he'd been expecting.

"You-don't have-the _right_," Roxas choked out, still sobbing.

Axel looked around at everyone as if to say 'what do I do?' Xion was the only one looking; everyone else had bashfully turned away. She just shot Axel a sort of apologetic look and shrugged her shoulders.

"I don't know what you want me to say," Axel said gingerly, "I'm sorry... I'm sorry..." he repeated softly, holding the crying boy close to him. Roxas was taking deep breaths, surely trying to keep it together.

Out of the corner of his eye, Axel saw Demyx leaned up against the door frame, remnant of the other day. His arms were crossed and he had a bitter expression frozen on his face. His eyes met with Axel's briefly, and Axel was sure that there's be some kind of conflict, but as Demyx opened his mouth to say something, Zexion came to the rescue. He rested his hand on the sandy blonde's shoulder, and murmured something to him. Axel didn't know what he said, but whatever it was seemed to persuade Demyx to let it go and allow Zexion to lead him away.

Roxas finally stopped trying to hit him and wrapped both of his arms tightly around his neck. In turn, Axel held him tighter, having finally accepted that Demyx was gone, and not coming back.

_Take good care of him, Zexion,_ he thought to himself, _I'm counting on your to make sure he'll be okay._"

Suddenly, it felt as though a massive weight had been lifted from his shoulders. The guilt still lingered, but it no longer had to concern him. Demyx didn't have to be the center of his attention anymore. He wasn't there to dictate Axel's decisions anymore. Now it was all about Roxas.

He could live with that.

**Please leave me a review! I know I don't deserve one for making you wait so long. But... could you leave one anyway? Pretty please? *makes big kawaii eyes***


	12. Reflection

**__****Hey hey, gorgeous! What's this? Am I updating twice in one week! It appears to be! ****So I got a beta reader :3 finally! So this is hopefully the last chapter you'll ever have to deal with my raw typos in! **

**So I guess quite a few of you aren't liking the whole sci-fi thing :/ I'm so sorry to disappoint you, I guess maybe I should have labeled it "sci fi" instead of adventure. But I DID want to address one anonymous reviewer who asked why I was simply tossing out ideas at random. PLEASE have a little more faith in me than that. I've been designing and redesigning this plot for MONTHS. Every little bit has its role to play later. BE PATIENT, LOVES.**

**Disclaimer: Since KH has replaced Axel with Lea, I got his rights! WHOOPIE! ... lol jk. still not mine...**

* * *

><p><em>Stop it,<em> Roxas thought sharply, _Stop making me feel safe. Stop being so damn warm, and so nice to be around. Stop making it impossible for me to hate you!_

"Can't you at least see where I'm coming from?" he asked, lifting his head up from the redhead's shoulder. They were still in the cafeteria, and everyone was still around. Thankfully the edge had left his voice though, and people were trying to talk again. He detached himself from Axel and sat down on the bench next to him.

Axel just stood up, however, offering his hand, "Come on, we're going to talk about this somewhere else."

Roxas became aware of all the people subtly staring at him and nodded, ignoring the hand he was being offered (what could he have done with it, anyway?)

"Bye," he muttered before exiting the room, "Do you even know where we're going?" he asked Axel.

Axel shook his messy red hair, "Nope. Not at all. We're gonna go exploring."

Roxas wasn't sure if they were actually allowed to do that, but that wasn't really an issue that concerned him. They didn't walk hand in hand, given Roxas didn't even have access to his hands. They didn't know where they were heading, they were wearing torn clothes, and they were covered in dirt and dried blood. Axel had a red welt on his cheek, and Roxas had two or three cuts on his forehead. But somehow that was all okay.

"I _do _know where you're coming from," said Axel quietly. Oh hell, he was brushing his hand against Roxas' again as they walked, just often enough for it to pass as unintentional, even though Roxas knew damn well he was doing it on purpose. Secretly, he sort of liked it.

"I'm confused," said Roxas bluntly. Not in a distressed manner, or a guilty manner; he was simply stating a fact. "I couldn't tell you what I'm feeling right now. I-I think maybe the only reason," he was starting to break down a bit, "The only reason I c-care so much now is because she's g-gone."

He took several shaky breaths in an attempt to compose himself. He swallowed thickly, "And that makes me feel like a terrible person. It makes me feel all the more guilty for liking you—don't act all surprised, you know I do. Even though I _shouldn't, _not anymore.

"If it's any consolation," Axel muttered, "you're not the only one that feels like total shit. I wish things didn't happen like they did, I probably could've handled it way better. 'Cause I really like you too."

Roxas turned to meet green eyes. "You say that, but how am I supposed to trust you? You told me one that you weren't a slut. Evidence of that is against you, my friend."

"I know that, but really, I'm not," said Axel unhappily, "I'm not gonna be _that guy _and try telling you that Demyx meant nothing to me, because that's not true. I loved him for a long time, that's why this is so hard for me. Surely you can relate? You're not entirely innocent yourself, kid, it takes two to tango."

Thinking about it, he most definitely _could _relate. What Axel was saying was pretty much verbatim to what had been going through his own mind as of late. He _was _at fault, but he still felt justified in being angry with Axel, because he was also angry with himself.

"I think..." he began steadily, biting down on his lip, "that we can work through this. But I'm gonna need some time, Axe, okay?"

Axel's expression brightened _almost _imperceptibly, "I can give you time," he agreed, "take all the time you need. I'll be here."

Through the situation wasn't exactly ideal, Roxas was glad to be given hope. Hope for himself, and for Axel. Even if it was false hope, he needed it to hang on to. Perhaps at least one aspect of his life, eventually, would turn out okay.

They turned a random corner by mutual agreement and Leon, of all people, greeted them with a pile of folded clothing.

"There you go," he said flatly, "I have a change of clothes for each of you. Come with me, Axel, if you're going to go to Hollow Bastion with us today. Roxas, there's a conjoined bathroom between yours and Sora's room that you can use."

Roxas replied, "Alright. Where's my room again?"

Leon pointed in the direction opposite of whence they came. "Take a left at the end of the hall, then take the third right. Your room number is 13. The castle is set up in a similar manner to _Poir, _if you hadn't noticed."

He hadn't noticed, but given the drastic difference in size and decoration he didn't feel like that was too degrading.

"Okay, thanks."

"See ya, Roxas," said Axel, turning to walk away.

Roxas followed him on a whim, "Hey Axel?"

The redhead turned around. "Hmm?"

Roxas linked one of his arms around Axel's neck and pulled him down for a kiss. It was a nice kiss; short, sweet, and to the point. The point being, 'I will try for you.'

It felt good.

It felt right.

When they parted, Axel flashed him a dorky smile before turning around to follow Leon down the hallway and out of sight.

Roxas raised two fingers to touch his lips where Axel's did.

_I really shouldn't be doing this;_ he thought to himself, _it's like an insult to her memory. _He knew it really wasn't; that Naminé would have wanted him to move on, and be happy. It's what he would want for her, and that's what he'd want for Axel. He just felt so incredibly _guilty, _he felt like being with Axel would be like replacing her, like forgetting about her. It was cruel; what kind of person would wait for her to _die_, and then just move on? He never wanted that.

_Room 13... Room 13, where are you?_ He repeated to himself as he walked. He made it a priority to become friends with Sora; out of everyone else in this place, he was the most likeable in Roxas' opinion. He liked Zexion too, but if Demyx would be spending lots of time with him, then it would probably be best to avoid them both when possible. He was still intimidated by Demyx, and with good reason, he thought. But really, he didn't know anything about him except that obviously that he'd been dating Axel and was in some way acquainted with Marluxia.

He found his room finally and flopped down onto the bed that had been provided for him. Now, where was this bathroom? Looking around, he spotted a door near the closet on the far left wall. He knocked on it gingerly, perchance Sora or Riku was in there. When no response came, he swung the door open to reveal a pretty spacious bathroom.

The first thing Roxas noticed once inside was his reflection in the mirror, like most people did when in the presence of one. He wasn't purposefully looking into it, nor did he ever, really, aside from that passive look every time he passed one. It was like even though he knew exactly what he looked like, it was still intriguing to see his reflection, a perfect replica, staring back at him.

Roxas, now, was especially intrigued, and slightly mortified, by the young man staring at him. He didn't look like himself at all. His hair lie matted and flat, for once, and he could now see clearly the full extent of the damage inflicted on him.

His face was gaunt and sullen, and covered in blotchy tear streaks in a thin layer of grime, from all the crying he'd been doing since yesterday. He stared at himself through heavy lids, trying to find himself somewhere in the face he was staring at. He looked so dead, almost zombielike; which was only further enhanced by the layers of dusty cement, dirt, and blood he was covered in.

When he couldn't bear to look at himself anymore, he shook out of the torn clothes he was wearing without much difficulty, and attempted to take a shower.

Have you ever tried showering without the use of your hands? Don't. It's next to impossible. He wasn't sure at first, if it was even okay for him to get the bandages wet, but decided it didn't even matter to him and that he'd rather be clean. Leon didn't say anything, so it must be okay. The water soaked right through them, stinging him, but the pain was manageable. The tricky part was actually washing himself.

There was a lavender loofa hanging from the rack, but Roxas was a decent enough person not to use it, regardless of how much easier it would have been. This meant that in order to lather himself in shower gel, he'd have to squeeze it out onto his leg and spread it around with his elbows. It was a frustrating and tedious process, and shampooing was even worse. He couldn't reach the top of his head with his elbows, so he had to very carefully try to lather it into his hair with his stiffened, covered fingers.

After he'd gotten all of the dirt and other scum off of him, and deemed himself, 'clean enough,' he gave up and decided to instead take a soapy bubble bath.

It felt good to soak in the hot water. It saturated into his pores and loosened his tense, aching muscles. It was much easier like this for him to pour soap onto him and was ten times more relaxing. At some point he even decided to sing a little (after listening _very _closely for hints of movement on either side of the walls of the room).

He alternated between singing songs at complete random and mourning his dead girlfriend until the water got cold; about a half an hour. After which he stood up, drained the tub, gave himself a final rinse from the overhead spout, and set to the task of drying himself. Aside from getting the towel wrapped completely around himself, it really wasn't that hard. He sat on the toilet and enjoyed the warm air for several minutes before attempting to get his clothes on.

That was _far _worse that either the showering _or_ drying off. The tee shirt wasn't _too _too hard to shimmy over his head, nor was it _too _challenging to wriggle into his boxers, as ridiculous as it probably would have looked to an outside viewer. The jeans, however, were _murder. _The stiff denim fabric clung to his damn skin, and no amount of kicking or wiggling could get them to move. He ended up lying on his bag, sticking his legs up vertically, and yanking them down by shoving his immobilized thumbs through the belt loops and drawing them towards him.

It worked for the most part, until they stopped at his butt. He solved the problem by setting his legs down, and arching his back to pull them over that way.

He didn't even _attempt _to do his fly.

Just as he was scooping up the wet towel to hang over the curtain rod, there came a knock on the door.

"Be out in two seconds!" Roxas called shortly to the knocker. It came from Sora and Riku's end.

"Oh, okay! No worries, Roxas!" Sora's voice called back to him.

Roxas threw the towel carelessly over the rod and went to open the door. "I'm done in here," he informed Sora with a forced smile, "and I borrowed your soap," he admitted.

Sora laughed at him. 'Well I'd assume so!" he said, clapping him on the shoulder, "you're one of us now, right? My soap is your soap and all of that."

"Thanks."

At least the relationships between roommates would be harmonious.

"Do you want to hang out? After I go to the bathroom, I mean," Sora asked him. He wasn't regarding him pitifully, or with concern, fascination, or any other kind of looks the people here had been giving him. If anything there was only mild curiosity and genuine friendliness.

Roxas gave him what he hoped was an appreciative look as he nodded. 'Sure. I'll let you use the bathroom now."

He left the room on his side, gathering up the ruined shreds of his old clothes as he went. He wasn't sure what he was supposed to do with them, so he just bundled them up and threw them on the floor near the foot of his bed.

Within a minute, Roxas heard the toilet flush, the sink running, and then, a tentative knock on the door...

"Come on in," he replied.

Sora poked his head through the door.

"Hey," the brunette greeted, crossing the room to sit on the swivel chair Axel had used the day before. Even after he was seated he swung left to right, like a child, though he was careful to keep facing Roxas.  
>"Is there anything you want to talk about? You've had it pretty rough. Some people like to get it all out; I'm like that, anyway, I don't know about you."<p>

It became immediately clear to Roxas that Sora was a talker, and not much of a listener. That was okay though, he was more interested in what Sora had to say instead of his own traumatic life. He wanted to try and move on. Talking about it was lingering. Lingering was deadly.

"I don't want to talk about me," he said gravely. He looked at Sora, who was perfectly at home and relaxed in that little chair of his, 'Could you tell me more about the Keyblade?"

He didn't know what possessed him to ask about the wretched thing, especially since he didn't believe in such things. But this was what these people seemed to base their lives on. So, madhouse or not, it would probably be best to know the story.

"Sure," said Sora easily, "It's a weapon of the light, but that doesn't mean it can't be used for bad, too. I mean, the universe almost got destroyed because of it. Like the name implies, it looks like a key. I can wield it," he added quietly, "Because I'm an indirect descendant of Ventus."

It occurred to Roxas that he'd probably said it so quietly because Ventus had become quite a touchy subject with Roxas. But he was also intrigued. "Oh yeah? So you and me—?"

"Yep! We're kin, you and me. We're kind of like brothers! So, do you want to see?"

"See?" Roxas asked, confused.

"I can summon it, the Keyblade," Sora clarified.

Roxas wasn't sure what Sora meant by 'summon,' but if what he said was true, then he would be able to prove to Roxas that there was some sort of basis, factual basis, behind this crazy story. The trick that Zexion had done was cool, but the same thing could probably be achieved with trick mirrors. Needless to say, Roxas was very skeptical about the whole thing.

"Yes," Roxas said, "yes, I would like to see."

Sora nodded. "Okay. Stay where you are though, 'cause it's pretty big."

Roxas sat obediently on his bed and watched Sora. The brunette extended his hand, shut his eyes, and flexed his fingers as though he were trying to grab hold onto something invisible in midair. But before his fingers could close in on themselves, a giant key materialized out of nothing.

It looked like a skeleton key, the kind you could purchase at a hardware store. The base had a handle going through it, though, and that's where Sora held it. It was gold at the base, and the neck of the key was silver, as were the teeth. The teeth were interesting; they extended down into the shape of a crown.

"Wow," Roxas breathed. It had come, literally, out of nowhere. "Why is there a keychain hanging from it?"

That wasn't the question he'd meant to ask first, but it was the first logical question to appear in his mind. There _was _a bulky chain hanging down from the handle, and it looked like it would be quite an inconvenience in battle.

Sora picked up the object at the end of the chain and held it up for Roxas to see. "This was King Mickey's crest," he explained, "he was a Keyblade wielder himself; Xehanort taught him during his attempt to overthrow the kingdom. I don't know why mine looks like this. My dad's was the same though, 'cept his handle was silver and the neck was gold. I think they were just forged that way so that we of the resistance could identify each other. I'm told we were a lot bigger group back then..."

"So mine will look like that?" Roxas asked hopefully. It was pretty cool.

Sora shrugged. "It's hard to say. If you are who we think you are, it could look like anything. We don't know much about the three, but we know their names: Terra, Aqua, and Ventus. Ventus is recorded to have backhanded his Keyblade, which I found to be pretty interesting. I've tried it, but..." he trailed off, as though perhaps he were afraid he was talking too much.

"Records?" Roxas asked, unaffected by the talkative brunette. He was curious. "You have records of this stuff?"

'Well, not really _records," _Sora clarified, "But reference points and stuff. Like pages from the King's journal, old depictions of what the key-bearers looked like, and of course, everything that's been researched by our leaders; some five, six thousand years' worth of knowledge."

"I have a question..." said Roxas slowly, "this all happened in biblical times, right?" Sora nodded, "Is there any kind of reference to this in the Christian bible?"

"You're Christian yourself, right? No there isn't. There wouldn't be, see, because all this happened in Hollow Bastion, and Christianity and Judaism all originated in Agrabah, and was spread and popularized by Radiant Gardens. It didn't spread to Hollow Bastion until the discovery of gummi blocks, not until a thousand years ago. The men that recorded the bible didn't have any knowledge of the affairs around here. I hope that doesn't affect your decision to believe in us." Sora finished.

Roxas appreciated Sora for being able to tell him all of that without completely writing off his religion. While Sora's take on Christianity was unclear, Roxas was grateful that he at least had respect for it.

"I see..." said Roxas, "So, you have the cells, right? Can you do anything weird, like Zexion?"

"Not really," Sora admitted, "I'm still learning new things about the Keyblade, but I don't have the kind of psychic power to do anything but summon it. Which I don't mind, really, I think it's pretty rad. There are only four people here that can do other things. So far," he added, "I can't speak for you and your friends. If Axel is the child of Ariel and Eric, then he probably has them. I know they did."

"What can everyone here do?" Roxas asked quickly. He didn't want to touch the subject of Axel just yet.

Sora shifted on his chair so that he was sitting on his knees. "Well," he began, "You already saw Zex; he's an illusionist, so he can create pretty much any image for you to see if he concentrates hard enough. Lexaeus, you know they're brothers, right? He's an earthshaker; he can manipulate stone, and dirt, and other naturally occurring structures. We call Xaldin Windwaker, because his element is air, which could be _really _deadly for anyone that tries to pick a fight with him."

"Is that all?" Roxas asked.

He shook his head. "Not completely. Riku is very special. He was trained with all the other nobodies, he can use what they call dark Gaia. The only thing is, doing that requires him to take the life force of his enemies. It's hard to explain..." he scrunched his face up in concentration, "like, he takes the power slash energy away from his opponent, and turns it into like, this dark ball. It makes it really hard for him to train, because if he lets it get out of control, he could easily kill one of us. I've offered to help, but, you know..."

"Yeah," said Roxas, "I wonder if I can do anything cool," he mused.

"Oh, I'm _sure _you can!" said Sora enthusiastically. "We'll find out soon enough; as soon as your hands start to heal up. Do you wanna, like, go to the library with me or something? I could show you some of the 'records' we have. Like, the pictures and stuff. It would probably help you to understand better, cause I know this all probably sounds like insane, freaky-ass bullshit to you."

Roxas laughed hollowly, not because of the bullshit, but because he was actually beginning to _believe the bullshit. _"I would like to go, thanks. If I'm going to be here for a while, I might as well know what I've gotten myself into."

Sora hopped out of his chair with a grin on his face. "Cool! It's about time we gave you the tour anyway."

The castle, it turned out, was not nearly as complicated as Roxas originally thought it would be. It _was _set up in a similar was to _Poir;_ there was one main hallway, and all of the rooms were accessible through smaller hallways. The library was on the second floor, and the stairs going up and down were pretty much right across with wing with all of the bedrooms.

"Alright, here's the library, and the hall of records is right next door," said Sora, pushing open the large, ornate doors. The library was _huge, _bigger than any Roxas had ever seen. Were there any actual sun streaming through the stained glass windows, it would've been magnificent. The entire thing was magnificent, with the exception of one small detail: those who inhabited it.

Demyx and Zexion were both seated in some of the many ploofy arm chairs spread across the library. Zexion was reading, naturally, and Demyx was across from him, lightly strumming an acoustic guitar. According to Sora there was a musical based room somewhere in the depths of the castle, from which Roxas assumed Demyx acquired his instrument. Neither of the two had noticed his presence yet, and he really wanted to leave before they did; he didn't want to make trouble with Demyx.

But Sora, being Sora, did not seem to notice the tension between them, and he immediately shouted, "Hey Zex! Can me 'n Roxas join you? I'm gonna show him some stuff about Ventus."

Demyx stiffened in his chair, but he did not miss a chord. The song transferred smoothly to its melancholy bridge.

Zexion looked up from his book, unperturbed. "_I_ don't mind," he said quietly, as if interring that somebody else _would _mind.

"Could I have a word, Roxas?" Demyx asked suddenly, slapping his hands down onto the strings harshly, silencing them.

"Umm, yeah, I guess so," Roxas replied uncertainly. What was he supposed to do, say no? He was too nervous to meet Demyx's eyes, to see if they were angry or not.

He let Demyx lead him through the massive hedge maze of book shelves until they came across a pair of isolated chairs, accompanied by a work desk. He and Zexion must spend a lot of time in here for him to know his way around already.

"Relax. I'm not going to bite you," said Demyx, dropping down onto one of the chairs and motioning for Roxas to do the same.

"Yeah? Then what are you going to do?" Roxas asked, settling hesitantly in his own chair.

"Talk," he replied simply, "I want to know a few things."

This was ridiculously uncomfortable. Surely he would ask about Axel, and then Roxas would have to awkwardly explain how he'd been clueless the whole time, and _then _about how they planned be to together in the near future. What would happen then? Assuming that Demyx would be staying the TWTNW, he would forever have to feel like the ex-boyfriend. Roxas didn't want to inflict that upon him.

"Okay," Roxas greed numbly, "I'll answer any questions you have for me." Were he in Demyx's place, he'd want himself to do the same, after all.

"Do you buy it? The whole Jenova story?"

"Is _that _what you wanted to know_?" _Roxas asked incredulously. "I don't know... I think I'm starting to. I saw Sora summon a Keyblade out of nothing. Like legit, _nothing._ I don't like the idea of being reincarnated from some kind of warrior, and the whole pull thing seems really sketchy to me"

Demyx listened attentively, and despite the discomfort of the situation, it was nice to be able to vent and proclaim his suspicions to someone who would hear it. Someone who understood, by some level. He and Demyx weren't really that much different, Roxas realized.

"I see..." said Demyx, "Would you tell me what happened—what _is _happening between you and Axel? I'm not gonna freak out or anything, I just want to know"

"Saw that coming..." Roxas mumbled. "Yeah, sure. I have to have things in black and white, too. I get it. What do you wanna know?"

"What do you know about me?" Demyx inquired through suspicious eyes.

"Umm... well. I know that you told Marluxia that Axel fucked Larxene?" he offered weakly. "Serious, before yesterday, all I knew about the person named Demyx was that he was acquainted with both Axel and Marluxia."

"So you don't know that he and I were in an open relationship?"

Now this information surprised Roxas, and it also angered him a little bit. "Absolutely not. He said he'd only sleep with someone he cared about."

"Uh-huh. And was that before or after he slept with you?" said Demyx, tapping his foot against the floor.

"We never had sex," Roxas retorted hotly, "I mean, we sort of kissed and stuff, but he never made a pass at me like that. Actually, to be honest, I found him to be quite a gentleman."

Demyx's expression, surprisingly, softened at that. "Yeah, that sounds like my Axel," he said, almost wistfully, "But tell me this: You're just as guilty as he is—"

"I told you, I didn't—"

"Let me finish. You _supposedly _didn't know about me. I got that. But didn't you have a little lady of your own? If you didn't have a problem sneaking around behind her back, why should I believe that you wouldn't do the same to me? You don't even know me."

"My girlfriend is _dead,"_ said Roxas through gritted teeth. "I planned to leave her, before I knew you were around. Obviously after that, things changed. I went home, and before I could even come clean to her, she died. _Died._ I'll _never_ be able to atone for that. I _know _how bad I look to you, how bad I _should _look to you. But I am a human being. It was never my intention to hurt anyone; hell, it was never my intention to _be _with Axel at all. Things shouldn't have turned out the way they did, and for what it's worth, I am sorry for coming between the two of you."

There was a short pause in which Demyx looked torn. Apparently, he had come for a fight, after all.

Finally, he said, "I'm not heartless, either. I choose to not believe it was your fault. And... I guess I don't want things between us to be too harsh or complicated. Axel and I are over. But, if you don't mind me asking, do you guys plan to, err—continue in the future? Now that I'm out of the picture?"

Roxas, though uncertain of what was going through Demyx's head, decided that it was best to just be truthful. He'd find out eventually, anyway.

"I want to be angry at him," said Roxas. "I really, really want to be angry at him. And I am. But...I don't know, it's like it's impossible to stay away. That's probably not good. But to answer your question; yeah, probably."

Demyx furrowed his sandy brow. "I'll tell you what, kid, I don't like you much. But that's probably just the green eyed monster coming out of me. If Axel's happiness didn't matter to me, I'd probably punch your lights out. But... it does." He bit his lip, wet them, and then continued, "Congratulations, kid, you got yourself a fucking blessing."

"Really? Wait so, we're like, okay? _You're _okay with this?" Roxas asked.

Demyx shrugged. "Not really. But Axel never exactly denied having feelings for you, and that's gotta count for something. If I'm gonna be a bitch about this _nobody _is gonna be happy. I'd rather just try to let go. Isn't that what all of us are doing? Just... go about it discreetly, yeah? I already feel like crap about this. Not to be an ass or anything, seriously, but I don't need to see you two being all happy couple together just yet, okay?"

Roxas nodded immediately. "That sounds very reasonable to me. Thank you, Demyx."

The brunette nodded and mumbled a response. They simultaneously stood up as a common agreement that the conversation was over.

He was grateful to Demyx, truly, for being so calm about this whole situation. It was a long shot that Demyx would even listen to anything Roxas had to say, let alone believe him, let_ alone_ give him a blessing. Hopefully, after this conversation things wouldn't be so tense between them. Either that, or they'd have that kind of relationship where you take extra measures to simply avoid the presence of the other. Only time would tell.

It was astounding, really, how quickly life moved, with or without you on board; how quickly Roxas was adapting to the new world around him. The fact that he'd never be able to go home, that he had no home to go to; it took a commendable effort to be able to wrap his head around it. _Never _was such a funky concept.

He followed He followed Demyx out of the book maze and back into the main atrium, where Zexion and Sora were now chatting in hushed tones. They stopped as soon as the two came into sight, and Sora stood up.

"Hey…" he muttered as soon as Roxas was within earshot, "Zex explained what was going on, do you want to leave?"

"Nah, it's fine," Roxas muttered back, not wanting their conversation to be overheard, even if what they were discussing couldn't be more obvious, "I think we're okay."

Sora's voice went back to a more suitable volume for speaking when he replied, "All right, cool. I pulled out some photographs of these old murals that people'd made inside the bastion, as well as some of the king's old records."

"Sounds good," said Roxas agreeably, eager to get away from the subject of his relationships.

The first piece of paper he picked up was a thick scroll of ancient papyrus, covered in the sloppy scrawl that he assumed to be King Mickey's handwriting.

_Maleficent has requested an audience with me again. She says it's urgent that I hear what she has to say. All I know is that witch can't be up to any good-14 M_

_Today, I heard the prophecy with my own ears. Maleficent rumors in strange tongues that Terra, one of our three legendary Keyblade wielders, lies entombed beneath the hollow bastion. It gives me the heebie jeebies. She claims that Ventus, bless his soul, I'd known him since he was a small child, would come again, and defeat Master Xehanort once and for all. My toes sweat at the possibility that the most dangerous entity known to man lies so close to my people. Tonight, I attempt to beat myself rid of these fantasies, but it is indeed a test. She has never been wrong in the past.-15 M_

Roxas swallowed and set aside the ancient scroll, turning instead to look at the photographs.

It was something of a shock, seeing the depictions of the Keyblade-wielders on paper. Some of them were very crudely done, others reflected age-old craftsmanship, the kind one would expect to see in a history museum. But that wasn't what really got to him. No, what got to him was how remarkably similar the drawings looked to himself.

Not all of them, of course; a fair few showed a tall man and woman, often joined by the hand, brandishing their weapons. The man had dark hair and a wise, stony face, and the woman had bluish hair and notably bright colored eyes in the majority of them. The one that stood out the most to Roxas was a photograph of the inside of a large cathedral, in which the object of the rich, stained glass windows, was him. Or Ventus, rather. It must have been, since Roxas hadn't existed at the time of its creation. The boy who so closely resembled him was depicted holding a magical blade in his hands, as he stared below.

"You okay?" Sora asked, concern edging it voice. It was a lot to take in.

A question suddenly arose in Roxas' mind: How had they found him? After millennia of searching, surely they had more to go by than a picture.

"How was it that you guys figured out who I was?" Roxas repeated his question to Sora, "I'm sure you didn't just _happen _to see me walking down the street and think 'oh my god it's Ventus!'"

"That was all down to chance, really," said Sora, "Somewhere along the line, we lost track of your bloodline, one of your ancestors must have left us at some point… Anyway, we weren't the only ones tracking you. The nobodies found you first, according to our little friend in Twilight Town. The rest was fate, really. Maybe you don't believe in fat, that's okay. But to me, the odds of you coming here, to Hollow Bastion, and applying for a job at our cover base of operations; you coming _right _at us like that, are probably right next to the odds of our sun exploding right this second," he paused, "Does not happen. Leon found your file with like, twenty other applications he'd narrowed down his choices to. He had us run some backup checks. Later on, we knew that you were the one being trailed, and you _are _of direct bloodline to Ventus."

"And how was it that you deduced _me _to be Ventus himself?" Roxas asked, crossing his arms.

Sora shrugged. "They don't tell me everything, man. I'd assume that if you can summon the Keyblade all on your own, without a parent passing down the method to you, you must be him."

"What about Cloud? Does he have a part in any of this?"

"Cloud is your half-brother," said Sora, "I ran his background myself. You have different mothers, correct?"

Roxas nodded uncomfortably; it was strange, to say the least, to have a stranger know so much about you.

The brunette continued, "Since Cloud's mum is from Midgar, there's a very, _very _good chance that he has the cells, but your heritage traces back from your mother's side of the family."

Roxas suddenly thought of his own father. The man was tall, not like him, but he had the hair. The crazy, spikey, blonde Strife hair. He had the greatest sense of humor, even though, being a schoolteacher, he was relentless about Roxas' education. Would they ever even see each other again?

"You're thinking about him, aren't you?" said Sora. "I can see it in your eyes. You don't have to worry about him; he's safe and sound in Twilight Town. We have him under our protection. You'll see him again," he promised, "He doesn't even have to know about any of this."

"I know," said Roxas. "It's just… I think—I've been running away from the question I really want to ask. What's gonna happen to me now? Just tell me that. Nothing else really matters anymore…"

Everything was changing; he _needed _something to hold on to.

"That's up to you, really," said Sora, shrugging, "It'd be the most convenient for us if you agreed to stay here and become our agent, but of course you're at liberty to leave if you like. But just know that _they will be hunting you, _at _all _times. They know that Ventus is supposed to come again and kill Xehanort, and they already suspect you of being the one. The best case scenario if they find you is that they'll try to recruit you. But they know you've been here now, so, in the worst case scenario, they'll torture and kill you."

Roxas chuckled nervously, edging hysterics. "T-torture and death wasn't exactly on my list of things to do this month."

"We're not gonna let anything happen to you," said Sora determinedly, "We'll teach you self-defense, how to fight with the Keyblade, and our history. You can make a life here."

"And all of this is to fit your own agenda?" said Roxas skeptically.

"Essentially," Sora replied neutrally, "But this isn't just about all of us. This is also what's best for _you. _You are, first and foremost, a human being. Like I said, we can't and won't stop you from leaving, but if you do choose to leave, bad things will happen to you, and that I guarantee. They won't give up. No pressure, though."

As much as Roxas didn't like the idea of becoming an object to them, or a weapon, the fact stood that there were people out to get him. It _was _in his best interest to stay in the castle, to join the craziness. His life here would be hard, but it was his best option. At least he'd never be bored.

"It seems like I don't have much of a choice," said Roxas miserably. He never wanted this. He didn't opt to become some kind of warrior or fighter. He just wanted to take pictures...

"I know this really sucks for you," said Sora, "But it doesn't have to. I mean, you could be just as much a part of this as we are. I mean, me and Riku are in charge of maintenance; in other words, we keep the place up. Tifa handles the financial affairs; Xaldin's our chef... we all have lives, either in here or out there. Leon used to maintain _Poir_ so that we could afford this. Sure, we don't pay property taxes, but…"

"And what would I do?" asked Roxas, "You know, day to day?"

Sora turned his palm upwards, "I don't know. It depends. Zexion and Lexaeus haven't had much to do at all since _Poir_ burned; they were doing a lot of the management. A lot of times there isn't really much to do. Half of us used to live in the city, and keep normal jobs. I guess for a while you could find other people around and see what they need help with. You can learn a lot that way. Nobody expects you to just right in; first you need time to heal. After that, we'd probably focus a few hours a day on your physical training, and after that, it's all basically what you want to do."

Damn, does Sora talk a lot.

"I think… I think I'm done here," said Roxas plainly, pushing the neat little pile of records back to Sora. "Sorry. I know you went to a lot of trouble to dig it all up. It's just so overwhelming, you know?"

"Yeah, I get it," said Sora, stuffing it all into a manila folder. "Well, it's always here when you want it. Do you wanna go to the rec room or something? There's a ton of interesting things on this floor. We got a crafts room, and a greenhouse, and a planetarium. And let's see… there's the storage for _Poir,_ but I can't imagine why you'd want to go there. Oh, and we have a sanctuary. Riku's got a ton of DVD's in the rec room."

"That sounds great," said Roxas honestly, "I'll check out the other rooms some other time, but a movie sounds perfect, seriously."

Sora brightened considerably, probably happy to see Roxas actually being enthusiastic about something.

"Follow me," he said.

The recreation room was more or less like the recreation hall. It was the size of Roxas' entire apartment, and it included (but was not limited to) a pool table—which was currently surrounded by Tifa, Kairi, Xion, and Cloud— a foosball table, a dartboard, a giant flat screen (no cable though, as Sora sadly informed him) a full bar, a popcorn maker, and a karaoke machine.

"Leon is a firm believer that in order to work hard, one needs something to look forward to at the end of the day," Sora explained, "He's the one that invests in all of this stuff. Go pick out a movie, and I'll start the popcorn."

"Oh hey, could we watch too?"

The group across the room were making their way over. New clothes donned Roxas' crowd, and they appeared almost completely unharmed, with the exception of the cast that now covered Xion's leg; he hadn't noticed it earlier in the morning.

"Of course you can!" said Sora, prancing over to the popcorn maker, "The more the merrier."

"Have you been okay, Roxas?" Tifa asked, her big brown eyes full of concern.

"You guys don't need to keep asking, you know. I'll be fine," said Roxas, forcing a smile. He hated when people worried about him. He didn't need to be _babied_, for goodness sake. He was a grown man, and he could take care of himself. "I appreciate the concern," he added, not wanting to sound like an asshole, "But mostly, I'm just numb; waiting for all of this to catch up with me, you know?"

Tifa smiled. "Of course. We just want you to know that you're not alone."

Cloud sat next to him as they watched some really generic spy movie. It was a strange thing, getting a taste of the 'normal' life after so much had changed. TV still existed. Food, technology, even the people were all the same. Hollow Bastion would need restoring, but his mom and dad; Hayner, Pence, and Olette; everyone in Twilight Town; life was going on for them, just as it always had. He'd have to go back to the outside world at some point too. He could find a satellite phone, and call them from there.

For the first time ever, he found himself questioning the legitimacy of the film. Crazy movies like this used to entertain him because they made the impossible possible. But what if some of it was real? Not the storyline, obviously, but the advanced technology. With a self-sustaining, life supporting castle out in the middle of space, it was hard to _not_ believe in the impossible. It didn't all seem so insane anymore.

About thirty minutes in, the door to the rec room busted open, causing them all to jump.

"Sorry!" Zexion apologized quickly, being among the intruders. "All I said was that I smelled popcorn and we couldn't keep them away."

"Damn straight," said Cid, who was the ring leader. He marched right into the room, in all of his engine grease-covered glory, and started shoveling popcorn into a plastic cup. He was wearing a pair of goggles on his forehead, and he had a utility belt secured to his waist.

"Our apologies," said Xaldin in his deep baritone, stepping in to help himself as well. "We'll let you get back to your movie in a sec."

Demyx was among them too, but he stood shyly behind Zexion. The poor guy probably felt so out of place here; he was just a tag along. He didn't have anyone here, not even a brother.

Kairi seemed to be thinking along the same lines as Roxas, because she said, "Why don't you two join us?" she gestured to the quite ones in the doorway. "I can assure you, Demyx, none of us are going to bite. Except maybe Sora. But he doesn't usually do that unless we give him caffeine."

Now that was a bit strange. Kairi knew of the situation between them, surely, with Xion's help they could definitely piece things together. So what was she playing at? As far as Roxas knew, the only ones that knew of his and Demyx's agreement were the two of them, and possibly Zexion.

He wondered how Xion felt about all of this. Naminé was her best friend; it wouldn't surprise him if she were enraged by the affairs between himself and Axel. She should be, but Roxas wasn't sure if she even had the capacity to hold any amount of anger beyond slight irritation. He'd never seen her throw a fit before. Not a serious one, anyway.

At that moment, however, she looked unperturbed. In fact, she was nodding and smiling warmly to Demyx, and she, too, was beckoning for him to come sit with them.

In all honesty, Roxas didn't mind Demyx so much, and the guy certainly didn't deserve to be all alone in a situation like this. So he gave what he intended to be a meaningful nod of the head, a message from him to Demyx, saying, "It's okay, I don't have a problem with you."

And so, as Cid and Xaldin stepped out, Zexion and Demyx came in.

"What's the deal with Cid?" Cloud asked, before Roxas could, "Is he as crazy as I think he is?"

Tifa shook her head. "Nope. He's crazier. But he's brilliant. He's our top gummi engineer now. Almost all of the ships we have, he built himself. He is crazy, though," she added for emphasis, "He gets up in the wee hours of the morning to go tinker about in his workshop, and build new prototypes. We had to blastproof the entire basement, because if he blew something up, and that hit the _boiler_, oof."

"What do you mean, 'all the ships we have?'" asked Roxas. Apparently there was still a lot more things about the place he had to learn.

"There's a hangar in the basement," she informed him, "For when we need to go places other than Hollow Bastion, or like now, when the hangar in Hollow Bastion is out of commission."

_Or like several years ago_, Roxas thought. He had noted the "now" in her sentence as she'd described Cid and it clicked in his mind that he must have been the successor to Axel's parents. He felt strangely sad for the redhead.

"I see…" he mumbled numbly.

When Zexion and Demyx were seated comfortable on the loveseat, which had previously been empty, Sora tactfully pushed the play button, resuming the voluptuous basting and shooting and over accentuated spy music.

Roxas found himself thinking involuntarily about Axel for the umpteenth time. He wondered how _he_ was taking all of this. It was pretty obvious by now how Roxas was, what with all the yelling, fainting, and crying he'd been doing. But Axel, with the exception of this morning's outburst, had kept a pretty steady composure. Out of the group, besides ever happy-go-lucky Xion, Axel was definitely the one that seemed the most stable. Finding out that this place was here, that's hard enough, but to find out that throughout his life, the people he loved were involved, must have been unbearable. Maybe Roxas had been being a little bit selfish.

And what of their relationship? He seemed to remember waking up infuriated with Axel. How had he gone from that to kissing in the hallways in such a short amount of time?

_Maybe it's the pull,_ a sneaky little voice toward the back of his mind hissed_, After all, most of the other things they've been telling you have proven true, perhaps you don't have a choice in the matter_.

_Don't be stupid, I would have noticed,_ he countered, playing along with his mind's little banter_. It's not like I took one look at him and it was love at first sight, that's crazy!_

_Yet think about how much he's changed you,_ the sly voice replied_, You had an affair, you cheated on Naminé, you enabled all of that._

_That all was me though!_ He argued, _**My**__ fault, because I made the choice. I did bad things because __**humans. Make. Mistakes.**__ Just because I fell in love—_

He stopped short. He did not just think "I am in love," did he?

He leaned his head back against the couch and scoffed at himself in disbelief. He was not in love with Axel.

Was he?

* * *

><p><strong>Sorry guys... just deal with the filler chapters for a LITTLE longer, okay? I have a little treat for you coming up next :3<strong>

**P.S. Perhaps I haven't reminded you in a while, but j'adore reviews!**


	13. Destiny Can Be a Bitch

**Good evening, darlings! I don't even know how I'm popping all these things out so fast, since I've been a carrier of some sort of plague for days now. Like half the time, I can't even think straight and the rest of the time, I can't see straight.**

** So I went and read like, all of your reviews, and realized just how much I love chatting with you guys. Seriously, you're all so fucking funny! It like, makes my entire day when you give me suggestions and your opinions. I should write an interactive story one of these days... what would y'all think of that?**

**This is really just a happy/ish filler chapter for ya; the story (and the AkuRokuness) shall progress SOON. **

**Disclaimer: I'm still working on it...**

Demyx's mind often liked to wander. He'd heard of many other people doing this, so it didn't bother him too much that his mind liked to conjure up scenarios that weren't possible, or probable. Some of them were so ludicrous that he fancied he'd be locked away in a nuthouse for even thinking them. Demyx had always been like that.

So, when put in a traumatic experience such as this one, his mind acted somewhat on autopilot and did the one thing that came naturally to it: it imagined. He thought about his homeland, and then about his homeland being destroyed, as Hollow Bastion was. He thought about work, and then quickly remembered that he wouldn't have to go back to work. It almost made him sad.

He looked around to make sure that he hadn't missed anything while thinking. The room, decorated with Zexion's own personal touch, didn't look any different than the last time Demyx surveyed it. Lexaeus was hanging out with Xaldin and Cid, and Zexion was still just lounging about on his bed, a novel in hand. Zoning out was a pretty common thing for Demyx, and Zexion immediately understood that.

Zexion made a very good companion. He picked up on almost everything Demyx felt, but never badgered him to speak. He talked about—when he talked at all—things that did not matter. Silly things, little things, philosophical things…hypothetical things. If anyone ever brought up a touchy subject, it was Demyx himself, and the man with the strange hair would offer him advice or consolation if it was needed.

Often it was. But the rest of the time, he just sat on his bunk and silently read books, allowing Demyx to have his space.

Which is how Demyx's mind came to conjure up a scene that involved himself and the intellectual.

He _was not _fantasizing, honest! No, seriously, he wasn't.

Basically, in Demyx's mind, the two were walking through the castle's makeshift courtyard. Makeshift, meaning sky-patterned wallpapers, bright lights to mimic sunshine, trees, flowers, fountain; the works. It wasn't real, but it was the closest thing they had to the real thing. They walked, through mazes of flowers and around little trees and alongside hedges. Stone benches lined the false cobblestone path, but there wasn't really much need for them.

In Demyx's own head, of course, it was not exactly like the 'real' one; there was real sun, and it was shining. Birds were singing, and the wind was blowing. From somewhere nearby came the sound of a rippling brook.

Then, as something of a mutual agreement, the two young men reached out simultaneously for one another to interlock fingers. It was a bit strange, since Demyx had not imagined himself reaching, nor did he know that Zexion had been reaching for him. Yet there they were, walking hand in hand. He peeked down to the slighter man to see him smile.

Demyx snapped out of it suddenly. He'd never seen Zexion smile, nor had he ever seen both of his eyes. He wished he could; the man was beautiful.

_So soon after Axel, though, _he thought sadly,_ I couldn't do that._

But Axel was long gone. Bonded, Zexion told him. It was doubtful that Roxas was aware of the situation, and for that Demyx pardoned them both. But it was still hard to think about, how quickly he'd lost the one he loved. Another thing his mind fancied to conjure were things he could have done differently to avoid the outcome; one was exceedingly simple. Don't sleep around.

So, in a way, it was a bit counterproductive to be thinking about moving on and becoming involved with Zexion so soon.

"Demyx."

He snapped his head to up to meet one eye, that lingered between green and blue. Zexion was looking at him, quite seriously. It was like he could read him just as easily as the book he held in his lap.

"I know what you're thinking about," he said bluntly. "And I know what you're feeling."

He withdrew an old bit of parchment and tossed it over to Demyx's bed. It fluttered silently onto his knee.

"I know, because when I started feeling the same things, I took the liberty of tracing your own Atlantican heritage… back to mine."

The 'bit' of parchment paper turned out to be a _scroll _of parchment paper, and attached were several other pieces, some old, some new, modern, and bearing Zexion scrawl of notes. The top of the longest section bore Demyx's family crest, and right underneath, circled in red pen: _Demikkusu-Zekushion._

"I don't know whether to tell you I'm sorry or not, because I can't tell what you're thinking now," Zexion continued, "But you and I, we are bonded. Our destinies entwined, by the pull factor. There's something else you should know as well: you possess Jenova's cells, like me. You have heightened psychic abilities."

Demyx nodded to show he understood, and then took a moment to take it all in. It was kind of a drag, really, to be forced into forever. It's not like time stopped and everything fell into place and was right within the world; not how Sora and Riku described it. He was still conflicted, confused, and not quite over Axel. But maybe… this could be his way out. If he could swallow his pride and let himself be happy with Zexion, things wouldn't have to be so difficult for everyone.

He raised his eyebrows in an amused sort of fashion and established eye contact again with the smaller. Zexion blinked.

"Not a reaction I was anticipating," said Zexion, furrowing his one eyebrow in confusion. It was such a funny sight, Demyx actually laughed out loud.

"I could say the same about you!" he replied jovially, "You just found out that you have a soulmate and you're acting shockingly cavalier."

"Oh," said Zexion, the lines on his face smoothing out, "No, it did come as quite a shock. You could imagine the look on my face when I found out that I was in fact not asexual at all."

They both laughed at that. Demyx decided that he quite admired Zexion's laugh, it wasn't a noise you'd expect to hear from him at all; it was actually kind of barkish.

He also decided that he really, _really _liked that smile. It was exactly like the one he'd featured in his daydream.

"I wouldn't know," said Demyx, still chuckling shallowly, "I can't really see your face."

Zexion raised one hand to touch the skin over his right eye. "I'm blind in this eye," he confessed nervously, "I can't see out of it at all, and when people see it, they make the automatic assumption that I'm mentally unsound. Or just creepy in general. It doesn't _bother _me any, DiZ says that it probably lead to my being an illusionist. It's merely a social inconvenience. So I keep it covered."

Demyx then made a very bold move, a leap of faith, if you will. He crossed the room and sat right down next to Zexion.

"Could I please see you?" he asked gently.

"You might as well," Zexion replied quietly, "as it seems we will be spending quite an amount of time together in the future."

Demyx raised his hand to brush the bluish bangs away from Zexion's right eye. He took his time in doing so; he let his fingers trail over the pale skin, and by the time the hair was pushed back completely,

Zexion had his eyes close and was exhaling softly, like he was in nervous pleasure.

Then, finally, he opened them.

The iris was not scary, or white, or deformed in any way like Demyx was expecting it to be. It was almost the exact same color as the other, perhaps a shade lighter, as it was clouded over. It wasn't focused on him, obviously, like the other was, but it didn't matter. To him, Zexion was perfect. He could almost _feel _his heart swelling to let this man in, as a feeling of acceptance spread throughout his body. Is _this _what Axel and Roxas have been fighting all this time?

"Are you scared?" Demyx asked. It was a perfectly legitimate question to ask, in his opinion, since it was presumably the first time in Zexion's life that he'd ever been so intimate with anyone else. That, and it was happening _so _quickly. They'd been acquainted for a total number of _two _days.\

But Zexion shook his head and whispered, "No."

Kissing Zexion was not like kissing a stranger, like Demyx was used to. It was sort of like kissing Axel, in the sense that they weren't just linking lips together because it felt nice, there was _feeling _behind it. Zexion reached up to curl his fingers through Demyx's hair, which, having no access to product, hung shaggy, ruffled, and everywhere. It was then that Demyx let his eye, which were only at half lid to begin with, slide completely shut.

He was in complete awe at how _right _it felt. It was like Zexion's body was made to fit flawlessly in his arms, like their lips were made exclusively for each other.

Zexion was his missing puzzle piece. They fit together perfectly. Axel was close, perhaps, a good fit, but they sported separate colors. That, and once Axel found his Roxas, any hope for them was lost.

As Demyx realized this, _it _happened. It was like somebody took a pair of shears and sliced the strings that connected Demyx to Axel, as easily as cutting into butter. And in their place, thick, golden cords wrapped themselves around he and Zexion.

Demyx expected himself to feel guilty for letting go of Axel. He expected there to be at least some residual feelings. And there were, but they were only of joy, and happiness in memory of all the good things they shared. He didn't have to be sad, or broken, or upset anymore. He was free from the heartbreak and woe. The Bond, it wasn't shackles, not at all. It was _freedom._

He felt Zexion smile and they broke apart. A faint blush had spread across the other's cheeks and his eyes were wide and full of wonder. His hair looked windswept, even though it had been lying completely still.

He was positively glowing.

"So, whatcha thinking about?" Demyx asked lightly. Zexion reached out to interlock their fingers.

"Not bad for a first kiss," he replied, giving Demyx another one of those glorious smiles.

* * *

><p>Naminé's funeral was small, and gloomy, like all funerals. The people of the castle congregated in the sanctuary, and later, she would be brought down to the basement, where the hangar was; the only place in the castle that was not sealed airtight from the space around them.<p>

She lay in a closed casket, of course, all packed and wrapped up to be launched right into space. Her body would float along in a casket, forever and ever and ever.

Roxas felt properly numb. He supposed he was probably crying, like Xion was next to him; like Sora was, even though he'd never met Naminé once. Cloud, of all people, was the one to speak for her, as Roxas was deemed incapable at the last minute.

The tall blonde approached the casket, clad in some black ensemble that Leon threw together, and spoke with no microphone. He didn't need one, his voice echoed clearly through the wide, lonely room.

"I'm not really sure what can be said about Naminé," he began softly, "that would do her justice. It's not something that can be explained, how special she was. It wasn't fair that she had to die. She was a kind, wonderful, _beautiful _soul. If she saw a glass with water in it, she wouldn't call it half empty, _or _half full. She—" he voice began to tremble a little bit, "She would have put a flower in it. It blows that she's not here anymore. But in life, I believe that she was happy, and loved. The worlds lost a wonderful person, artist, and sister."

Cloud wasn't the most verbal of people, and his speech was delivered somewhat awkwardly, but in Roxas' opinion, he couldn't have worded it better. As the words sunk in, so did the harsh reality that she was inside the gleaming casket, and they were going to cast her away, and he could never, ever see her again. What they'd had wasn't true love, but it was the closest damn thing to it. It was like losing a sister, or a best friend. He didn't even have anything to remind him of her. Not a drawing, not even a photograph. She might as well have never even existed.

"..goodbye, Naminé." Cloud finished.

Roxas sunk to his knees and cried, and the rest of the room watched solemnly. Xion clung to him and sobbed into his shoulder. Nobody questioned the two broken people; everyone in the room had dealt with death, he was sure of it. Cloud approached them and embraced them as well, as red eyed as Cloud ever got.

* * *

><p>They did not have a wake for her; the gathering broke up shortly after Cloud's speech. Roxas didn't even see her go. Leon said it would be better that way.<p>

Axel kept his distance as the trio headed back to their bedroom, and Roxas was glad he understood that boundary. But at the same time, he longed for the redhead's touch. He missed the soft touches and the warm kisses, and everything that made Axel _Axel._

What a goddamn terrible person Roxas Strife was.

"Are you angry with me, Xion?"

The raven-haired girl, who was perched on Axel's bunk in the redhead's place, shifted her gaze (one of her eyes was still scarlet) over to him.

"No. Why would I be?" she asked, genuine curiosity shining in her eyes.

"Oh. Um…" he blushed awkwardly, knowing what he'd have to tell her next. "Because… me and Axel, we're, uhh, we're kind of a thing. Given the situation, that's not very honorable."

"Stop," Xion commanded, holding up a delicate little hand, "How could you even ask a question like that? I know perfectly well what's going on, Kairi and Tifa told me everything."

"Then why aren't you pissed!" Roxas demanded, "I had _no _right—"

For the first time, Roxas saw her get angry. "What! You think I'm that _insensitive!_" she screeched, her volume rising rapidly, "I _know _it's not a choi—wait. Do _you _ever know what's going on?" she changed her tone to something calm and more inquisitive.

Roxas rolled his eye. "Of course I do. It's _my _situation after all. I _left _her, while she was still alive, and now I can never come clean. I'm moving on _way _too soon. So. How do you justify my being a total asshole and fucking over your dead best friend!"

He spat the words out harshly, and regretted it as soon as he got them out. She shouldn't need to feel everything that he did. That wasn't fair to her.

To his great surprise, she didn't argue, or get angry, or cry. She keeled over in a fit of giggles.

"Oh you poor _thing_," she said happily, leaping across the room to hug him, "No wonder you feel so guilty! I can't _believe _nobody told you!"

"Told me what?" he asked cautiously. Somehow, he knew the answer before she even opened her mouth.

When she did, he was ready for it. "You didn't betray Nam, because you didn't have a choice. Roxas… you and Axel are bonded. Once you two met, destiny took over."

So that was it then. It was over from the moment he stepped into _Poir._ Actually, it was over from the moment Axel ran him over with his skateboard. Even that probably wasn't a chance meeting. What all would have been different, Roxas wondered, if they didn't happen to meet? Would Leon have still assigned them together? Would they have ran into one another at the bookstore? Would Roxas even be sitting here?

"We talked about it, you know," she informed him, "Me and Naminé, I mean. She said you were totally head over heels. I guess if anyone knew what that looked like, it was her," she said thoughtfully, "I wanted to severely injure you, but she said no. She said she wanted you to change on your own accord. So, if it makes you feel any better, she did know, in a way. She just never got to hear it from you."

Roxas' heart sank. He almost felt worse. It was like he didn't even know her.

"Was she happy?" he asked through gritted teeth, "Did. She. Die. Happy?"

Xion squeezed his hand gently. "She was worried about you. But essentially, yeah. She wasn't sad or angry, if that's what you're asking. She was just… princess."

Roxas felt tears pricking at the corners of his eyes, but he wouldn't let them go.

"Yeah…" he said lamely, "Yeah, she was."

Cloud said nothing. He just lay in his bunk and stared up toward the top.

"Axel said he wanted the bottom bunk," Roxas reminded him, "You can have this bed if you don't want to go up there."

"And how are _you _supposed to get up there?" Cloud asked, eyeing Roxas' hands, "Don't get your panties up in a bunch, I'll move."

After the switch, the three of them stayed silent for a long time. Roxas didn't know what to think. He didn't know what to feel. He wanted to let go and be _anything _other than the miserable wreck he was becoming. But how does one get over something like this? There's no way.

Axel. Axel lost his parents. Axel knew what to do. Axel could make things better.

Maybe.

"Everyone okay in here?"

Speak of the devil, and the devil shall appear.

Roxas was the first to speak, because he knew that his opinion was really the one Axel sought. "Yeah, we're okay. It's your room too you know."

"Just making sure," Axel replied, approaching his bunk cautiously to take a seat next to Xion. She didn't regard him reproachfully, she slid right aside to give him room. It looked like he'd earned her approval.

_Apparently she didn't have a choice, _Roxas thought, in a not so nice mocking of her voice.

He wasn't into buying her claim. He didn't want to believe that he had no choice in the matter, that it wasn't his fault. He was driven completely by guilt, and no matter how anyone else tried rationalizing it for him, there was no way to shake that guilt. It was absurd, to think that some ancient hocus pocus was responsible for destroying his relationship instead of him. Because that was not the case. It was true that, against all odds, he and Axel always seem to end up together. But—ah fuck it, he was just going in circles.

"Perhaps we should enlighten Axel," Xion suggested, with a sly grin planted across her face.

_Oh yes, lets. As if enough shit hasn't happened today, _Roxas thought sarcastically.

The redhead turned to the girl next to him. "Enlighten me? About what?"

Roxas groaned and plopped his head down into his pillow. It was the closest thing he could do to face palming in this situation.

"You and Roxy are stuck together!" She proclaimed, interlocking her fingers as if to further demonstrate.

Axel blinked. "Huh?"

Roxas had to do everything he could to suppress the giggle that bubbled to his lips at the sight of Axel's poor confused face. "She means we're bonded, idiot," he said, trying not to sound _too _serious, "It seems that _Ventus _or whoever decided it would be fun to marry and _bind _me to you. Ha. You were a _girl._"

Cloud snorted; Xion giggled like a little schoolgirl.

Axel looked dumbfounded. "For real?" he asked, his mouth agape.

"According to her, anyway," said Roxas, waving his hand in Xion's direction. "Also, I thought you should know, I managed to acquire a blessing from dear old Demyx. You're welcome."

He realized that he sounded like an asshole. He had no reason to be mad at Axel (for the time being) if what Xion said was true. He supposed it was just his way of coping. Axel didn't seem too affected, anyway. In fact, he appeared rather pleased.

"Really? How'd you go about doing that?"

Roxas shrugged. "He pulled me aside, and said that he didn't want to be "that guy" that never gets over a bad break up. He said he was gonna try not to hold it against us."

Axel held a very thoughtful expression on his face as he said, "Well that was thoughtful of him So!" he changed the subject with a cheery grin "If I was a woman before," he giggled, "Is that why I'm a fag now?"

"Not necessarily," said a bubbly voice from the doorway; Sora was poking his head in, backed by Riku, "Just because the days of the keyblade war were the first to be recorded, it doesn't necessarily mean that that was each of our first life cycles. Hi!," he greeted, waving at them all, "Is it okay if me and Riku come in? 'Cause we can leave if you want—"

"Ask them; I don't mind," said Roxas neutrally. In all honesty, he didn't mind. He'd found himself smiling, genuinely, for the first time in what seemed like so long. Namine would have wanted him to keep smiling. He was starting a new life here, whether he wanted to or not. He would cry, he guessed, for a long time. But that didn't mean he couldn't smile in between.

Xion gave them a welcoming smile, and Axel shrugged his shoulders. Sora looked up at Cloud, awaiting his approval.

"Cloud doesn't mind," said Roxas, "He's just not verbal enough to say so."

"Shut up," Cloud grouched.

"That means I'm right," Roxas clarified, looking affectionately up at his big brother.

Sora took a tentative step in. "Come on, Ku," he said quietly to Riku, dragging him in. "He's not as outgoing as I am," the brunette explained to the group.

Riku sat down awkwardly on the swivel chair, and Sora plopped down on the floor next to him.'

"You make it sound like I'm shy, Sora," Riku argued, "I just want to give them their space, is all."

"We were talking about other stuff anyway," said Xion, with a wave of the hand, "So, Kairi was right, right? Tell me she was right, it couldn't be more obvious that these two have a connection," she gestured towards Axel and Roxas.

Roxas could feel the blush rising in his cheeks. Whatever happened to them being a secret? He rested his chin in between his knees to try to hide the blush; glancing over, he noticed that Axel was doing the same.

"Yep, they totally are. Remember yesterday morning? We were talking about you guys."

Roxas thought back: _Are you two the only ones around here that are… bonded?_\

_Sora and Riku exchanged looks. "We've met a pair. But we don't know them very well._

_Those sly bastards,_ Roxas thought fondly. "O-oh," he stuttered.

"I'm pretty sure Demyx knows," Sora continued, "Zexion would've told him by now."

"That would explain why he let this go so easily," Axel mused, "Not the most logical of people, Demyx, but he _will listen_ to you if you present a decent argument."

Riku smirked, and said, "I think Demyx probably would've listened to him either way. I don't think you two are the _only _ones…" he trailed off omnisciently.

Axel looked round to Riku. "What? You're _kidding._ Him and Zexion?"

Sora and Riku both chuckled.

"We saw him going through the hall of records the other day, and you shoulda _seen_ the look on his face!" said Sora happily, "It looked like he was about to die from shock, 'cause I'm pretty sure he doesn't go one way or the other."

"Wow, I wonder how they're taking it," Roxas wondered. No doubt better than he was.

"Demyx is strong," said Axel fondly, "He'll be okay."

Roxas suddenly felt very jealous of Demyx. The mullet-head had managed to claim Axel all on his own, without using the pull to cheat. Axel was only here "with" him because he was forced by genetics. Obviously this isn't what he would have chosen otherwise. Then again, Axel had to use the pull to win _him _over, so the redhead probably felt the same way about… her.

He locked her name up, deep inside of him. He wouldn't say her name. If he thought of the name, he'd see the face, and the face would turn into memories, and in turn, Roxas would begin to cry again. He didn't want to shed any more tears for her. She wouldn't have wanted that.

"What now?" he muttered, not intending to have said it out loud.

Sora looked thoughtful. "Hollow Bastion is gonna need rebuilding," he said, "Leon's already looking into setting up a restoration committee. You could stay here, live with us. Become part of that. Take pictures in your spare time. Play pool with us on Friday nights. "He smiled reassuringly. "Just live."

Roxas laughed dryly to himself. "I never thought I'd miss my crappy apartment so much. I…I can't go back, can I? Hayner, Pence, Olette; my parents… they'd all be in danger."

Sora nodded solemnly. "I'm sorry…" he said, hanging his head.

"It isn't your fault," said Roxas, "I'll be okay."

And the thing was, he knew he would be.

**Don't fear, guys, Roxas' aloofness is just his way of showing affection! I got some pretty interesting shit for you guys coming up.**


	14. Getting on the Right Track

**Hey there guys OH MY GOSH it's been forever, hasn't it? I'm so sorry about that; my school year's wrapping up, so I've got finals, not to mention a violin recital, at which I GET TO PLAY HIKARI ALL BY MY LONESOME; AND I'm playing the national anthem at my state's minor league baseball game… yeah, I've been busy. But I DID give you an extra long chapter, and some fluffy treats! :D**

**Disclaimer: Kingdom Hearts isn't mine, but I'm working on getting this copyrighted, so soon the story will be :P**

In the next passing weeks Roxas began to heal, both physically and mentally. With Merlin's help (the old coot had _healing _cells); Roxas' hands were repairing wonderfully ahead of schedule. He was slowly beginning to regain fine motor functions such as feeding himself, bathing himself, and dressing himself.

By the time Christmastime swung around, he was down to wearing fingerless gloves day-by-day.

For the first week or so in the castle that never was, he followed Sora around, learning what he could about the castle and its functions. After that he made himself useful by becoming part of the Hollow Bastion Restoration Committee that Leon had set up. While he wasn't able to go to the site itself ("it's for your protection," Leon assured him), his ex-boss, who was still sort of his boss, promoted him to schedule managing.

It wasn't a very difficult job; every afternoon, he was given a list of tasks that needed to be done in the city every day, and he was responsible for creating and distributing itineraries for everyone who was part of it. He just had to have them all organized, typed, printed, and delivered to everyone involved by the next morning. He liked it that way, because he always knew what was going on, and because it was good practice for his fingers.

For the most part, his days were pretty simple. He got up at the same time as the committee members; a lovely six a.m. He didn't mind that too much, since naturally he was an early bird. Breakfast was eaten in the cafeteria with Leon, Tifa, and Cloud, the two former of which had formed a strange, unlikely friendship with Cloud. After seeing them off, he would head to the gymnasium (second floor) and fitness room to exercise, and try to get into shape for when his self-defense training would start.

Before then Roxas had never worked out before. He'd never had a reason to. He was naturally thin, and he ate as well as any nineteen year old. He did it now mainly out of boredom, and in determination to not let Naminé die in vain. These 'nobodies,' whoever they were, they would pay.

He couldn't do much weight-lifting or weapon training with his bum hands, but for at least an hour or two a day he would do crunches, run on the treadmill, use the elliptical, and if he was feeling okay, he'd attempt a few push-ups. He could feel himself getting stronger, and for the first time in a while, he had something to be proud of himself for.

Of course, his regular morning workouts didn't consume very much time, so he had to find other ways to occupy himself. Bath time came after that, which stretched for a rather long time, what with all the time singing consumed. After that he tended to find himself wandering about in the courtyard. It was the only remnant of the living world he had left.

Leon, or sometimes Cloud, would deliver the 'list' during the late afternoon, and Roxas would then go to the library to do his work for the day.

Everyone in the castle (with the exception of DiZ) at together, which combined only added up to fourteen people, not including Roxas. Dinner every night was, invariably, crazy. He could not remember one night where a tussle and or food fight had not ensued between Cid and one of the others, or Riku and Zexion, who had a very brother-like relationship, in Roxas' opinion.

It was okay though. It carried such an air of normalcy, sometimes Roxas would forget that he wasn't at home. That was a good thing, he supposed, that he could laugh again, and smile again, and not feel utterly miserable again.

But that didn't stop the nightmares.  
>Every few nights or so, not so frequently now as they were several weeks back, he would dream of running. Running, as fast as he could, away from the smell of burning bodies and smoke, from a crumbling city, and from a broken Naminé, always chasing him. Her lifeless corpse would be reanimated, and she would come for him at night. Sometimes, she would grow one wing, one black wing, which clashed sickeningly with the white. Then she would change. She got bigger, fuller, assuming a goddess-like form; with glowing eyes and flawless skin. He'd find himself frozen, unable to run.<p>

Then he would wake up, in a cold sweat. In the dead of night; the loneliest time of day, there was nothing he could really do to stop the tears from flowing.

Axel had to be the lightest sleeper in the world, because every time this happened, no matter how quiet Roxas tried to be, he just _knew._He would creep out of bed, without making a sound, and crawl into bed with Roxas, taking the blonde in his arms. And Roxas would let him. In fact he encouraged it; he would bury his head in Axel's warmth, and cry everything out, until he was ready to go back to sleep. Axel would stroke his bath soothingly, and hold him close. Sometimes they would kiss. Sometimes Axel would kiss Roxas, sometimes Roxas would kiss Axel. Eventually Roxas would calm down and get tired again, and they'd both go back to bed.

Their little midnight rendezvous went as secret and unspoken as their previously forbidden relationship had been. Not because it was uncomfortable or taboo, there was just a mutual understanding between them that there was no need to talk about it. During the day, in fact, they didn't talk much at all. Axel gave him his time, and his space, like he promised. They talked over dinner, and occasionally they hung out together in the rec room.

Sometimes, Roxas went into the sanctuary to pray. And Axel would find him there. Axel would sit beside him and hold him until he was done, and Roxas would let him.

What an enabler Roxas was turning out to be.  
>On this particular morning, Roxas was not in the gym. He was in the bathroom, splashing cold water on to his face, his heart practically jumping through his chest.<p>

"Don't be a coward," he was whispering to himself.

He stopped wearing his gloves yesterday. His hands were pink, and scarred over, but his palms were now almost completely healed. It had been exactly one month since he'd come to the world that never was.

Today, he would find out whether the King's Men were right about him. Today, he would find out if he was really the incarnation of Ventus. Today, he would learn to use to cells he was rumored to have been born with.

Today, he would be taught to summon his Keyblade.

There came a sharp rapping on the door, a sound that Roxas had long since learned belonged to Axel.

"Rox? You ready?"

The blonde shook his head no, only to himself, but aloud he said, in a quivering voice, "Yeah. Be out in a minute."

He had both of his palms on the sink and was staring helplessly at the mirror, so it wasn't a big deal when the door swung open and Axel stepped inside.

"Nervous?" he asked, his gaze piercing, even through the mirror.

"Umm." Roxas replied oh-so-literately. He turned his head back down towards the sink and he cleared his throat, "Yeah, I am."

He didn't bother trying to use his special glare on Axel, mostly because Axel was completely immune to it by now, and because in truth, Roxas really wasn't all that angry anymore. It shocked him, really, how easily and quickly he'd come to forgive the redhead; because he was the kind of person that held grudges. It must be the damn pull…

He felt a strong pair of arms weave between his own arms, to wrap around his waist from behind. He wasn't expecting them, so he jumped slightly. But Axel took no notice; he rested his hands firmly on Roxas' hips. He found himself relaxing into the elder's grip.

"Don't," said Axel softly. "You'll do fine. And I'll be right there."

"Yeah, you and the rest of the castle," Roxas muttered sarcastically  
>He felt Axel chuckle lightly. Suddenly, he felt like he could spend all day standing there like that. He tentatively reached his hand up behind him to curl into the thick tendrils growing from the base of Axel's skull. He leaned back and craned his head around so that he was somewhat facing Axel. Axel, in response, turned Roxas' hips ever so slightly. The moved simultaneously.<p>

Roxas shut his eyes and let himself kiss Axel. He let Axel kiss him back. He began to turn so that they could face each other entirely. Axel's touch lingered on his skin, like a burning trail was left from where his hands slid over. Roxas reached his other arm around Axel to pull them closer together, then changed the angle of his face so they could properly make out.

Before he was anywhere _near _finished, however, he heard somebody clearing their throat. A red-hot blush spread across Roxas' face as he broke the kiss to see who was so rudely interrupting them.

Kairi stood in the doorway, twirling a strand of hair nervously between her fingers. She had a slight blush on her cheeks as well.

"You two are adorable," she informed them. "Sora says that he's um, ready, whe-when you are."

She giggled anxiously.

"O-oh, right," Roxas stuttered, the nerves immediately returning to him when he remembered the task he was set to do today. "Okay. Yeah. Let's go."

There was a special room on the first floor designed specifically for psychic training. It was soundproof, lightproof (for cases such as Zexion) and element-proof. Roxas had only been inside once before, but he'd only caught a short glimpse as Sora was eager to show him the rest of the castle.

When Kairi led Axel and Roxas into the wide-spanning room, the south wall was already _completely _full of people, sitting against it. Merlin, Cid, Xaldin and DiZ were the only ones not present.

Seated on a little wooden stool in the center of the room was Sora. He was slouched over and grinning apologetically towards Roxas.

"Sorry," he said sheepishly, gesturing towards the chattering group, "I couldn't keep them out."

"I was expecting as much," Roxas replied with a halfhearted shrug. Axel and Kairi went to join the rest of the group, who were quieting themselves. Roxas, meanwhile, crossed to the center of the room to settle in a stool adjacent to Sora's. "So… how does it work?" he asked nervously.

"Well, the idea is, if you're Ventus, you should already know," said Sora. He pointed to the very middle of his own forehead, directly between the eyes. "See this spot right here? This is where your third eye is. Right where your brow bones kinda sink down a little bit. If ya push real hard on it you instantly get a massive headache. Anyway, everyone has one, but unless you have Jenova cells, you can't really tap into it. There isn't _really _an eye there, but for people who have the cells, it's the seat of all psychic energy. So uhh, shut your eyes, then concentrate on that. I can't really explain it—just sort of _think _about calling the Keyblade to you, and you should be able to figure it out. Take as much time as you need."

Sure, Sora _said _that, but with all eyes on him, Roxas couldn't help but feel rather pressured as he shut his eyes and attempted to do as he was told.

_Okay. Forehead. Keyblade Keyblade Keyblade… I feel so stupid; how the fuck should I know how to call the damn thing? Alright, just focus. Hmm… if I were a key, and a sword, where would I be?_

Suddenly, he felt a burning sensation underneath his forehead. It wasn't so much like a headache as it felt like his brain was jumpstarting. Like it was coming to life. That was probably a good thing.

_Alright, I see a door,_ he thought, and may possibly have said out loud. It was like a hypnotic trance; he couldn't be too sure his thoughts weren't vocalized. _And I'm standing on this huge pillar. It's like, stained glass or something. There are faces on it. Faces that look like the three._

_I really want to get through the door, _he thought frustratedly, trying to mentally force it open. _It just seems like it's __**really**__ important to open the door. But I can't. It's locked. Of course it's locked, that's what I need the damn key for…_

He looked around the dreamlike area, trying to find a trace of the thing. But everything was black. Only the floor and the door were illuminated. There was nothing else.

_I can walk around the door. I can walk behind the door, _he continued, his hypnotic self-projection traversing to the other side. _But I need to get __**through **__it. There's something else through it, I know there is. Come on—_

His thoughts abruptly stopped, and right then it came to him. _They _came to him. He involuntarily reached both hands out, and the door burst open, the brightest light streaming in, blinding him. And his hands, both of them, closed down on metal.

Roxas opened his eyes, his real eyes, and there they were. He was still seated on the stool, and in each of his hands he held a Keyblade. They were cool. Like they were really, really cool, and they weighed next to nothing. Experimentally, he swung them around a little.

Then he became aware of the delighted sounds of applause and shock coming from his companions. He had done it. He'd actually done it. When that thought dawned upon him, he dropped the blades in surprise. Upon hitting the floor, they vanished. The entire room held its breath, waiting, as he reached out to try calling them again. This time they came with ease, appearing in his fists exactly when he told them to.

"Wow…" he breathed. "I did it."

It was true. Everything they'd told him to this point had been the absolute truth. Something had opened, deep inside of him, when that door did. In that moment, the Keyblades warmed underneath him, and he could _feel _Ventus.

Sora observed in awe. "Two…" he whispered.

Roxas had _two _Keyblades.

"How do they feel?" the brunette asked excitedly. The two keys did not resemble Sora's. They were longer, and the designs were unique and intricate; one of them was black, and a chainlike design ran through the center. The other one was a blend of soft, light colors, and the teeth came down to form a starry design. They felt like extensions of himself, like they were always meant to be there.

"They feel… right," said Roxas honestly. He looked around at his friends. Xion was positively beaming, and Cloud was _almost _smiling, which in Cloud language was the equivalent to tears of joy.

He let the blades leave his hands. "I feel like that was somewhat anticlimactic," he chuckled.

Sora clapped him on the back. "Are you kidding? That was awesome! You have _two _Keyblades! I'm so jealous right now. I can't wait to train you, to see what you're capable of."

Roxas laughed awkwardly. "Heh, thanks, I guess. Are we gonna do some other stuff today, or…?"

"If you want," said Sora, shrugging. "But this lot doesn't have to be there for that. They just wanted to see Keyblades. How about we go have lunch, and then Zexion can help you figure out whether you have any other psychic abilities?" he turned his head to make eye contact with Zexion, "Zex?"

"It would be my pleasure," the smaller responded politely.

"Okay!" said Sora happily, jumping up from his stool. "I guess we're done, then. Clear out, you lot!"

It was unreal, Axel thought, watching his little blonde pull not one legendary blade, but two, right out of thin air like there was nothing to it.

Was he allowed to call Roxas _his_little blonde at this point? He didn't know. He'd given Roxas plenty of space, as was asked of him. Well, sort of. He kind of cheated during dinner. And at night. And pretty much any other time he and Roxas happened to be in the same vicinity. But he was _trying_, that's what was important. Not to mention Roxas had never actually told him no.

Axel had a feeling that everything was okay between them, it was just down to Roxas to accept and acknowledge The Pull.

He was both jubilant and vexed to find out that they indeed, were subject to The Pull. He was a bit skeptical at first, but with everything that had happened, it did seem logical that there were other things, bigger things, at work here. Axel had changed so much since meeting the charming boy.

Whoa, whoa. Had Roxas just taken his hand?

He had to look down with his own eyes to make sure. Yes, yes he had. They were walking together towards the cafeteria, along with everyone else, but Axel had never tried to pull couple-y things like that. But there they were, Roxas' hand, clamped almost hesitantly around Axel's own. Nobody else had even noticed. It was strange, how such a small gesture could mean so much to Axel. Was Roxas finally ready?

He caught with Roxas, or rather, Roxas caught him with his eyes. Axel gave the hand woven between his fingers a gentle squeeze, and in turn Roxas shot him a cheeky grin.

When the got to the dining room, Roxas didn't sit at his usual spot; across from Axel. Instead they sat side by side. Kairi, with whom Axel had formed a sibling-like relationship with, flicked him on the back of the head.

"Hey! You stole my seat, you!" she said teasingly. Roxas smiled and winked at her. It was nice to see him smiling again; Axel had been afraid for a while that it was gone for good.

It was hard for Roxas to be around Kairi, the blonde told him once, because Kairi was so similar in appearance to Naminé. The only difference was in their hair color and style. They really did strikingly resemble one another in facial features, body types, skin tone, and even eye color. Personality-wise, however, they were polar opposites, and that's probably why Roxas could stand being around her now.

Roxas, probably realizing that he and Axel had forgotten to get food, stood up, "Steal it if you can, then," he taunted, dragging Axel over to the little counter with him.

_At least he's eating again, _Axel thought as Roxas piled three grilled cheeses on a plate. "Are you gonna eat all of those?"

"Don't be silly, half of it is for you," Roxas replied nonchalantly. "I might eat two, though. Grilled cheese is finger food, and I swear to God it has been _way _too long since I've been able to eat finger food."

Axel chuckled at the logic.

When they got back to the table, Kairi had not taken her seat back, having instead gotten the message and settled in Roxas' old seat: between next to Sora and Riku.

"Feels weird, the change in seating," she commented casually, "You guys aren't going to start feeding each other, are you?"

"You're just jealous 'cause you wish you had you some of this," Axel retorted, nudging into Roxas.

Roxas nudged back, but flatly replied, "Absolutely not. I want to _enjoy _being able to eat without any assistance, for once." With that, he picked up one of his sandwiches and took a slightly aggressive bite out of it.

Axel took one for himself. "Agreed. I don't go for that kind of thing. Say Rox, are we together now?"

The blonde gave him something of a warning look as he held up one finger, waiting to swallow before he spoke. "We'll talk about it," he said simply.

Axel smirked to himself. _Victory is mine._

Suddenly, Demyx shouted from further down the table, "Hey! Can someone pass Zexy the ketchup? Please?"

Everyone fell silent except for Axel, who just shrugged like it was nothing and handed the ketchup over to Zexion. He thanked Axel quietly, and it was only then that Axel noticed that the rest of the room's volume had dropped ninety-eight percent.

"What?" he said obnoxiously, "This there something in my teeth?"

Tifa cut him off, speaking to Zexion. "Did you just allow him to call you Zexy?"

Zexion hunched his shoulders and hung his head low. Come to think of it, Axel couldn't recall a time anyone had ever gotten away with calling him anything other than Zexion. But apparently Demyx had, because instead of snapping, the young model murmured, "Maybe," in a bashful undertone.

"I think Demyx might have just made history," Kairi observed as chatter began to rise again. "Guess they really are bonded after all."

If they were, they did a pretty good job of hiding it. Sora and Riku, for example, were never, ever seen not making some kind of contact with one another, let alone being apart. Whether Sora was on his lap, holding his hand, or holding a thumb war, they were pretty much always touching. While Demyx was never found too far away from Zexion, their public relationship was nowhere near as extensive. Even Axel and Roxas found themselves in random bouts of affection from time to time.

But now that Axel put actual thought to it, now that he actually observed the couple, the fact that they were much closer than friends became apparent. Zexion was smiling in admiration as Demyx animatedly talked and laughed. As for Demyx himself, Axel could recognize all the signs of love from the early stages of their own relationship.

Demyx caught sight of Axel, who felt like a deer in headlights just sitting there watching him. He was expecting anger, or perhaps maybe a stiff nod. But he didn't get one. Instead, Demyx beamed at him, genuinely, gave him a little wave, and turned back toward the man that was presumably his lover. He was okay. He was _better _than okay. He was glowing.

It made Axel wonder what else he'd been missing. Like the fact that his family had been involved in an underground organization for his entire life…

_-Le Flashback Mode-_

_When Roxas was around, he had been able to keep his composure. But now it was just him, standing in the wreckage that had once, and always has been, his home. His blood was boiling._

_How could Reno not __**tell**__ him? Even after his parents __**died, **__his older brother couldn't have taken a spare minute to tell him why his parents were killed? Not deceased in an accident, no, __**killed!**__ And that he wasn't going to Midgar for the military after all? What made Reno so special, anyway? Axel had always been smarter, stronger, and more mature than him, so why had Axel been left out of the loop this whole time? Hopefully he'd find out soon._

_"Why didn't you tell me?" he demanded of Leon. "You knew all this time… my entire life. __**Your **__entire life."_

_Leon didn't take his eyes off the ground. This was pretty understandable, since there was quite a bit to step through._

_"It wasn't for me to tell," said Leon regretfully. "I know they were planning on telling you, since you turned eighteen. That's when they told Reno. But things happen. People get hurt," he pointed to the scar across his face. "People __**die.**__ I promised Reno that I'd protect you, and that I wouldn't get you involved unless it was absolutely necessary."_

_"So I'm not really a pro at modeling?" Axel asked bleakly._

_Leon looked at him like he was questioning his sanity. "Out of all that, you're worried about whether you look good in front of a camera?" he shook his head. "Axel, I can assure you, you are exceptional at posing. If you weren't I'd have you cleaning bathroom stalls. For what it's worth, I am sorry that you had to find out this way."_

_Axel kept his eyes on the road as he took in what was said._

_"When can I call Reno?" he asked upon passing a small family huddled underneath a blanket on the side of the road. "My phone… it got wrecked while we were out running. Or maybe even when we went to the falls; I don't know anymore."_

_Leon withdrew his own phone from one of his many pockets and tossed it back to Axel. "It's a satellite phone, so you should be able to reach him."_

_Reno, suspiciously, was third on speed dial. He answered on the third ring._

_"_Leon! What the hell, man, I've been trying to reach you, yo! What the fuck is happening over there! Is Axel okay!"

_"Reno," Axel answered, "It's me."_

"Axel! Shit, Axel, I was so freaked out! Are you okay? Where are you?"

_"I, Reno," Axel stated menacingly, "Am in Hollow Bastion, picking up the body of my current boyfriend's _dead _girlfriend, while he waits with my EX boyfriends, along with Kairi, Cid, and a load of other people I never knew existed. Care to explain what you're __**actually **__doing in Midgar?"_

_Reno cleared his throat. _"They died, Axel. _DIED. _Because they were involved. They were _killed. _I didn't want that to happen to you."

_"It's not your call!" Axel hissed. "I have a _right _to know! They were my parents too!"_

"I thought it was the right thing to do…" _Reno trailed off, "_I don't know what you want me to say."

_In truth, Axel didn't know what he wanted to hear. He just needed to vent to somebody. He needed to get all of the pent up, angry feelings he had off his chest. Reno had seen him explode before, and in that sense, exploding at Reno perhaps was not quite as bad at exploding at somebody he could scare away. Like Roxas._

_Reno cleared his throat again. _"I got your message from earlier," _he said, "_Are you all right? What's all this talk of boyfriends, you dog?"

_Axel knew that he was just trying to lighten the mood, but it really didn't help much at all. Nevertheless, he explained to Reno in extensive detail exactly what had happened, and what _was _happening between he, Roxas, and Demyx. To his great surprise, when he finished with the kiss that they shared only hours ago, Reno started chortling through the phone._

_"What!" Axel demanded, while simultaneously tripping over a particularly large chunk of metal._

_"Sorry, what was that?" he said, having missed what Reno's reply was._

"I said that's cute," _said Reno in a much louder (and incidentally, more obnoxious) voice, "_And that I totally know what's going on."

_"Really? You should tell me, 'cause I can't figure it the hell out," said Axel frustratedly._

_"_All in good time, baby brother."

_"Axel?" said Leon, who'd somehow managed to end up behind him, "We're here."_

SMACK

"The hell?" Axel exclaimed, bewildered.

"You were zoning out," said Roxas nonchalantly, "And I distinctly remember you telling me to slap you any time you did that."

Axel touched a hand to the tender skin where Roxas had hit him. "Huh, I guess I did," he said with a little laugh.

"What were you thinking about?" Roxas inquired, his head tilted slightly to the right.

"My brother," Axel replied, "I just can't believe he left me out of the loop this whole time, you know? How does family do that to each other?"

"Honestly, I was happier _not _knowing the truth," said Roxas bitterly, "Ignorance is bliss, no? I was _perfectly _content taking pictures. I had no problem with the idea of becoming a professional photographer, growing up, getting two kids and a dog, picket fence—the works. If I had been in your position, I'd rather live out a happy little life with no clue."

Roxas had a point. Things had been just fine the way they were, hadn't they?

"Still," said Axel. "It _did _happen. And I'd rather have been prepared."

He felt a light tap on his shoulder, temporarily zapping the thoughts from his mind. He turned around to see Zexion standing behind him.

"I think you have cells," he said quietly. "Jenova cells. When you're finished eating, would you mind coming with Roxas to the elemental training room? Lexaeus and I would like to get everyone with potential on the same track."

Training? Cells? Like he could do cool things too? Sweet.

"Yeah, sure. We'll be down in a sec," Axel agreed eagerly.

Zexion walked off, Demyx following close behind. Axel could see their fingers interlaced.

"Jealous?"

Axel turned towards Roxas to see the blonde staring at him with a spoon hanging from his mouth; he'd been previously using it to eat applesauce. He looked so innocent, it was adorable.

"Beg pardon?"

Roxas rolled his eyes and removed the spoon from his mouth. "I was asking if it made you jealous, seeing them together like that. Old feelings die hard, you know."

Axel hadn't even considered it. Was he jealous? He looked back to see, but all he could do was smile for them. "Nah. They really do seem to belong to each other. Maybe Demyx can finally find some security with him. He deserves that much. So!" he changed the subject, "You ready for this!"

Roxas scoffed. "Are _you _ready?"

Axel's face split into a wide grin. "_Hell_ yes."

"Okay! Now that you're all here, there is a simple test we can conduct to see whether or not you possess Jenova's cells."

Axel, Roxas, Xion, Cloud, and Demyx all stood in one line, facing Zexion, who had Lexaeus standing against the mirror behind them.

Zexion continued, "This is going to seem a little silly, but I want each of you to shut your eyes an imagine yourself standing somewhere. Try to imagine a place that holds fond memories to you. For example, maybe a beach, or woods, hell even Disney Town for all I care. Imagine every aspect of it; how it smells, the temperature…"

His voice began to fade into something of a background noise as Axel did as he was told. Beyond the bailey, beyond the great maw of Hollow Bastion, there was a forest, and in that forest, was a cabin; a little A-frame chalet that he and his family used to go to during almost every summer when he was younger.

"_Imagine every aspect of it; the smell—" _Axel inhaled deeply. Pine wood. "—_the temperature—" _

It was warm, but not too warm. He could feel the sun shining down on his back, but it was a comfortable kind of warm, countered by a slight wind chill.

"_Where are you? Are you standing or sitting?"_

He was sitting. He was sitting down on the reddened wood of the elevated deck. He could feel the cool surface underneath his rear and his bare feet. He tried moving his foot; the rough surface of the deck slid uncomfortably against the bottoms of his calloused feet.

"_Now, add everything else. Details, trees, animals, buildings, whatever it is that you're near. Incorporate the smallest little sights and sounds."_

The clearing was surrounded by trees, aside from the opening that led to a dirt road. The sliding glass door to the rest of the chalet was to his left; the edge of the deck to his right and behind. Beyond the deck to his right, a little tree stump that he and Reno used to use as a base when they played hide-and-seek. Directly in front of him, the way off the deck; two or three steps to the grass, and then several wooden planks to help a person get to the area for parking. Mourning doves were singing in the trees.

"_Okay, now look around you. Is there anything unusual about the place? You're looking for anything unusual, irritating, or perhaps frightening?"_

Axel looked round. Everything seemed in place to him: graphitied dumpster, charcoal grill, great big rock—oh hey, what was that? He was sure that wasn't there before…

It looked as though someone had piled strips of wood around the old tree stump and used it to light a bonfire. How had he not noticed it before? Huge, fast moving flames licked away at the wood; they were growing. He could feel the heat on his skin now.

"Yes," he said aloud. He wasn't sure how long he'd been silent for, but he was guessing a good fifteen minutes, since his voice was slightly raspy and coated with phlegm.

"_What do you see?"_

"A great big bonfire," said Axel, "It's massive, and it keeps getting bigger." The hairs on his arms were beginning to singe. "Nobody's put any kind of pit around it; if it gets bigger, it could start a forest fire."

"_You can stop it, Axel. Concentrate. __**Will**__it to stop."_

Axel did as he was told. He concentrated as hard as he could. But the flames were still growing, consuming, changing colors now, even. Suddenly, however, he stopped feeling the heat from them.

Or rather, he heat he _had _been feeling was beginning to collect, right in the spot Zexion had described for Roxas earlier. His third eye. The energy flowed abundantly through his veins, strengthening him, empowering him. It burned, searingly hot, but not in an unpleasant way.

It kept building up. It was kind of like sex, actually, except not nearly as pleasurable. But the burning heat kept gathering, gathering underneath his forehead. As it grew, so did the intense pressure. The pressure kept building, the harder he concentrated; he'd have to find a way to release it soon.

_Spread it around._

He wasn't sure whether the words came from Zexion or within himself, but either way it seemed like a pretty good idea. He could feel the heat traveling; off his forehead, down through his jugular, across his collarbones, to filter into his cephalic vein. It was still moving, spreading like a wildfire, leaving a burning trail in its wake as it coursed through his arms. Then finally—

The fire stopped. It had found its exit.

Axel opened his eyes and let out a startled cry of shock. His hand was _on fire. _It was glowing bright orange, for all of them to see. It was very warm on Axel's skin, but not hot enough to burn. It was like carrying a little life form. A little heart.

Zexion's eyes glowed behind the flame. "Pyroklectisis…" he whispered to himself. He face broke into a happy smile, the first, in fact, Axel had ever seen on him. "I'll be right back."

The others didn't have their eyes shut anymore, presumably because Axel's shout had broken their concentration. Roxas' baby blues were aflame as he watched Axel try to play with the fire. Axel soon found he could. He shrunk it, enlarged it, made it into a tiny column, and snaked it around his wrist. Upon making eye contact with Roxas, however, the flame vanished with a small little _pop._

"It looks like my giant keys have a little competition," said Roxas with a smirk. There was a hint of pride in his voice, and it made Axel really want to hug him. Before he could take a step, however, Zexion returned with a pair of circular metallic objects dotted with spikes.

"Your dad was a pyrokleptic too, Axel," he said proudly. He held up the wheel-like devices. "These are called chakrams. They're enforced with a special metallic alloy that can support a flame without being consumed by it. By my understanding, Eric made these himself. They belong to you now."

Axel took hold of the black handles, one in each hand. They were coated with a reasonably pliable material that he did not recognize. They seemed to recognize him, though. The material molded perfectly to the shape of his first. His father's fist.

"Wow…" he said out loud, swallowing the lump that had formed in his throat.

"They can be thrown like boomerangs, or used as melee weapons," Zexion continued, "And, if used properly, they can even shield you from certain attacks. While they are uniquely of your father's creation, I'm sure Leon can teach you how to use them properly.

"This means a lot to me, Zex," said Axel, "Thanks."

He spun them experimentally in his hands. They weren't too heavy, but they had enough weight to carry a decent momentum. He alternated arms, swinging them back and forth. He was able to maintain what he thought was a pretty steady balance, whilst throwing his hips back and forth. It reminded him of those silver creatures, although his movements weren't as sporadic.

"Hey, Zexion, what's a dusk?" Axel asked, having just remembered the metallic creature, "I kept meaning to ask, but I only seem to remember when the time's inconvenient."

"A dusk…" Zexion began hesitantly, as though unable to find his words, "Are what's left of a person if they're drained of their life force. Like… like with Riku. If Riku were to leech my psychic energy to use his own dark gaia, and he kept it up for long enough, or let it get out of control, I'd become a dusk instead of dying. It's like… it's like losing your soul. You become dead but not dead. You retain basic function and the ability to follow simple instruction, but the mind is lost. They feed on the things around them: scents, sounds, sometimes sights. Anything they're told to hunt. They can alter the area around to get what they want. It's really the worst fate that could be brought upon a person. The nobodies specialize in creating dusks. They have hundreds upon hundreds of men and women enslaved. Which is why we teach shielding."

"Shielding? What's that?" asked Xion, looking rather interested.

"It's exactly what it sounds like," Zexion replied, "It's a defense system to protect your mind from leeches, or telepaths, for that matter. When the resistance came across our first shadow-thrower ally, we managed to devise a way to prevent ourselves from becoming dusks. It's not infallible, but it helps."

The group remained silent, staring at their feet rather than to each other. After a moment, Zexion clapped his hands together awkwardly.

"Okay! So, um, Axel, you can sit down and take a break, so we can work on everyone else."

Axel nodded and sat next to Lexaeus against the north wall, which was made completely of mirror.

"Hello," Lexaeus greeted him kindly. Axel smiled and nodded to acknowledge him, but made no effort to hold a conversation, as Lexaeus didn't come across as talkative to him, one, and they shouldn't have been talking anyway, as it was polite to give the others silence.

Zexion repeated his trancelike statements, and this time, Demyx was the first to speak up.

"It's raining," he said after about ten minutes. "I mean, Atlantica is 95% water, but I mean it's _really _raining. At first it wasn't so bad, but now it's pelting me in the face."

He held an expression of pain and distress, but he didn't open his eyes. Axel wondered if _he _had looked like that with his big bonfire.

"Concentrate, Demyx," said Zexion, his calm, even tone wavering a little bit, "try to absorb the water. Will it to stop raining on you."

"I-I'll try," said Demyx. His face changed from one of pain to one resembling someone who was trying very hard to remember something. It almost looked similar to the one Zexion had during his demonstration on the first day.

Suddenly, from his very forehead burst a stream of water. His eyes remained shut very tightly, until an entire clone of him, made completely of water, stood before him. It was his exact shape, height, hell it even had a mullet.

He cracked an icy blue eye open.

"Wah!" he screamed. He fell down right on his ass, and meanwhile, the water-Demyx splashed over him and onto the ground, leaving a wet puddle to spread across the mat. Zexion ran to him immediately and crouched down next to him.

"That was amazing, Dem!" he exclaimed, "Are you alright?"

Demyx took several deep, shaky breaths. "Yeah, yeah I'm good. That was just kinda freaky, y'know?"

Axel wasn't at all offended that Zexion had so enthusiastically praised Demyx and not him. He understood his place, and he understood their relationship. He thought Demyx's water clone was cooler anyway.

Suddenly, everyone stood still as a bright light erupted, enveloping everyone and everything in the room.

"What the hell is that!" Cloud shouted, his eyes snapping open. Axel noticed that in this situation, their hue was raised to a color that matched Roxas.'

In his hands, Roxas held a blinding ball of warming light.

"What _is _that?" Roxas said in awe. Except his mouth did not move as the words fluttered through the air. Axel's jaw dropped.

"Did you just say something, Rox?" Axel asked uncertainly.

"_What? No, I don't think so."_

"No."

There was no mistaking it this time. Axel heard the words simultaneously, but the blonde's lips only moved enough to pronounce one syllable.

"Guy? What's going on? Aside from the glowing ball of light, I mean."

Zexion stood back up. "Well, it appears that you're showing signs of multiple talents already. I can hear your thoughts right now, Roxas. We all can. You're a communicator, or telepath, and light seems to be your element."

_Yeah? Then what am I thinking about right now?_

A glass of lemonade appeared in Axel's mind, as if he were thinking about or imagining one himself. Roxas must have planted it there.

"Lemonade," Zexion replied automatically, shielding his eyes from the light. "Roxas, do you mind…?"

"Hmm? Oh! Yeah, sorry," said Roxas, "I'm not—err, not sure how to make it—" he let his hands fall loosely to the side, and the light disappeared, leaving Axel in what seemed a very dimly-lit room with spots blurring his vision.

Zexion furrowed his brow. "Now, I'm not quite sure if the telepathic connection is still open."

Roxas turned completely away from Axel, and as he did so, Axel couldn't help but notice how damn _fine _those jeans made him look—

_Stop looking at my ass, Axel._

Cloud and Demyx snickered, and Axel could feel himself turning into a shade of red that matched his hair.

"Are you saying you can read my mind, too?" asked Demyx, sounding both bewildered and a bit alarmed.

"Only if you're craving ambrosia salad." Demyx's jaw dropped.

All chatter was abruptly halted as Lexaeus stood up. "We'll have to tell the others," he said in a deep, intimidating baritone, "And teach them to shield telepathically, as well as just from the shadow-throwers. We have to proceed with utmost caution."

Axel raised his eyebrow. Before just a moment ago, he didn't realize that Lexaeus was actually _capable _of talking in big sentences, and that's why he assumed the giant remained silent.

The color drained from Roxas' face. "You think I'm dangerous?" he asked fearfully.

Lexaeus nodded grimly. "By no means am I saying that you have any intentions of hurting us, or anyone. But we all need to learn to protect ourselves from you. As a precaution. We don't know what else you're capable of; you might hurt somebody without even meaning to. Until we learn the full extent of your Jenova cells, we're treading dangerous waters."

Roxas swallowed and nodded. Then he replied. "Okay, I understand."

"I can't hear you anymore, Roxy," Xion commented cheerfully. "That must mean you broke the connection on your own!"

'Not necessarily," Zexion countered, "We can't know for sure."

"I can't hear any of you, either," said Roxas, "Nobody knows what I'm thinking?"

They all shook their heads.

Roxas approached the wall Axel was seated against and slid onto the floor. "Well, that's a relief," he sighed, leaning against Axel's shoulder, "Because it would be _really _embarrassing if you all could hear what I was thinking all the time."

"Oh, really?" said Axel with a smirk, "I'm intrigued. What kind of things have you been hiding from me?"

Roxas shrugged. "Just… bad thoughts. I don't know, sarcastic thoughts, snide comments, general emo-ing. Things people don't need to hear. I'm sure everyone has them."

"Roxas," Zexion called. Axel and Roxas both turned to face him. "Sora and Riku are the best at shielding, as well as telepath-based techniques. You can pick this up again with them tomorrow, okay?" When Roxas nodded he continued, "Axel, could you summon your fire for me once more? After that, you can both be dismissed."

"But we just got here!" Axel exclaimed.

Zexion raised his visible eyebrow. "It's been over an hour. Plus, if I'm sure you can do it, I'll have more time to work on this lot."

"Alright, alright…"

He stood up, and crossed the room so that he was a far enough distance from his friends to not burn them.

"You don't have to picture the fire this time. Just call the energy to your third eye like you did last time," said Zexion.

_Okay, right. Fire. Forehead, forehead, go!_

To his surprise, the fire came immediately to him. It pooled up right between his eyes, and it seemed to build up behind them. Now that he knew which paths he had to spread it to, it was much easier to channel. Within the moment he had a little flame in his hands. He shaped it into a heart.

"Hey, check it out!" he said with a cheeky grin. Roxas giggled and shook his head.

"Thank you," said Zexion, eager to move forward, "You can go."

"Okay," he agreed, shrugging his shoulders, "Let's go, Roxy. Thanks for the lesson!"

"Bye," Roxas said, waving shyly at his brother and friend. He allowed Axel to escort him from the element-proof room. "What are you thinking about?" he asked as they traversed the long, narrow hallways, "I'd find out myself, but I can't figure out how to get it back. The thing, I mean. Getting it is like… I don't know how to describe it. It's like moving air."

"You," said Axel simply.

"What?"

Axel rolled his eyes. "I'm thinking about _you,_" he clarified.

Roxas turned a beautiful shade of magenta.

"O-oh," he stuttered, "I guess I've been thinking a bit too. A-about you, I mean."

_Well, here we are. The moment of truth._

"Dare I ask what those thoughts are?" Axel teased, trying to lighten things up some.

Roxas looked up seriously. "Ones that are far too sickeningly fluffy and disgusting for me ever to repeat out loud. **Ever."**

"Don't tell me you're turning into a girl!" Axel cried out melodramatically. Roxas hit him.

"I'm not kidding," he said solemnly, "I keep dreaming about you, and stuff. You keep showing up _everywhere. _Not necessarily in person, just," he tapped on his skull, "In here. Like yesterday, I made coffee for you even though you left early with the committee. And I saw a book in the library that was same color as your hair. Real dumb shit like that." He took a deep breath. "Listen, Axe, this isn't gonna go away. So uhh… let's just… let it happen."

If Axel could have paused time right there, he would have. And he would have done the most uncoordinated, horrifying little victory dance ever to be witnessed, and screamed his little heart out. But he did not have power over time (though it wouldn't have surprised him if Roxas did) and it was time to be serious.

"Really? Are you sure?" he asked. He hated asking the question, because what if Roxas wasn't sure? What if he changed his mind at the last minute? What if they had to go all the way back to square one and start over again? What if—?

"Just shut up and kiss me, damn it," Roxas growled.

Axel didn't need telling twice. Blue eyes met green for a moment, and then they were up against the nearest wall and kissing like it was their first. Limbs became twined in such a way that it became no longer distinguishable whose parts belonged to who. That exhilarating, first-kiss feeling was spreading through Axel like a wild fire, even if it wasn't really their first.

It was such a thrill, to be able to hold his little blonde the way he was doing, and to kiss him like he was doing. He put everything he had—fear, love, hurt, frustration, sadness, anger, and most of all, hope—into the movements of his lips, letting out everything he'd kept pent-up for the last several weeks.

And Roxas was eagerly kissing right back. He began to nudge Axel with his tongue a few times, egging him on to let things heat up a little bit. A few nudges later and they were having a full-blown, steamy make out session right in the hallway. Roxas was pressed so closely up against him that one could not fit a pin between them.

They were, unfortunately, abruptly cut off by a loud wolf-whistle. Without stepping back or attempting to shift their position in any way, Axel broke the kiss to see who was flagging them down. The answer rather surprised him.

It was Cloud, strangely enough, and he was accompanied by… Leon? How awkward.

"Yeeeeeah, Foxy Roxy, get some!" he yelled teasingly. Leon turned to whisper something in the taller blonde's ear, and that, amazingly, earned a chuckle.

"Well, hot damn, Roxas," said Axel, possibly loud enough for the others to hear, "I didn't know he was physically capable of making facial expressions."

Roxas giggled. "Neither did I. Yeah, you to, Cloud!" he shouted the last bit, suggestively winking at his big brother. A blush spread across his cheeks to match Roxas' and, as if this weren't strange enough, one appeared on Leon's too.

Roxas dropped his jaw. "_What! _You two? Seriously? Ha ha that is so _priceless! _I was only kidding you kno—_ah!_"

While he'd been talking, Axel had taken the opportunity to swoop his head down to latch on to the lovely little neck presented to him. The effect was immediate: blood pooled up in Roxas' little cheeks as he tilted his head to the side for better access. Axel could feel him slipping down the wall, so he gripped his waist firmly to steady him.

He could hear Leon and Cloud making hoots and catcalls, but he just flipped them off and kept going.

"Oh, hey now! There's no need for that! We just came to find you two to tell you that pool is about to start. Are you guys in or out?"

Axel and Roxas exchanged looks.

"In. We'll be down in a second," said Roxas, turning around to lazily lean up against Axel, who was purely delighted. His pulse quickened, and since Roxas was leaned up right against his chest, he could probably feel it.

Cloud nodded curtly at them and began to walk away. Leon, however, lingered for just long enough to make a threatening, cut-throat gesture to them before following Cloud towards the direction of the stairs to the second floor.

"Well that was weird," said Roxas, interlacing his fingers with Axel's. "I don't think I've ever seen Cloud acting like that. Unless he's bitching about something, his voice doesn't usually rise above sixty decibels."

"You think they're really together?" Axel asked disinterestedly. Roxas stood up fully and also began walking towards the stairs. Reluctantly, Axel followed.

"Hard to say," said Roxas thoughtfully. "On one hand, Cloud is totally awkward and clueless when it comes to any kind of romance. On the other, so is Leon. And, well, they were _smiling. _In the nineteen years of my short life, I've only ever seen Cloud smile while under the influence. If they _are _together, I'm happy for them."

Axel hmm'ed in response, opting not to continue the conversation. His thoughts were far more occupied with Roxas-related things.

_Holy shit holy shit I get to keep him and oh my god he's all mine. Roxas is mine! Ha ha ha! Hear that, world? Roxas is all mine mine mine hehehehheeheee he liiiiiikes meeeee!_

Charming, Axel was. Very mature.

If anyone dared call him up on it, he'd tell them to go to hell. Nothing could compare to how amazingly, incredibly _happy _he felt. He felt like he could fly. Axel had never done any drugs before, but by descriptions he'd received from friends, this, he assumed, was what it felt like to be on ecstasy. It was such an amazing high, the best kind of feeling to feel. But that's just love, he guessed.

"You're all smiles, aren't you?" said Roxas, who in spite of himself was smiling as well.

"Can't help it," said Axel happily, swinging their connected hands to and fro. "_I kissssed youuuu," _he continued in a singsong voice, _"And you kissed me baaaack."_

Roxas scoffed, "It's not like that's never happened before."

"But it was special!" Axel argued disgruntledly.

The blonde laughed. "You're a dork," he said informatively.

Axel gave his hand a little squeeze. "But I get to be _your _dork, right?"

Roxas squeezed back. "Yes, Axel, from here on out you are officially allowed to be _my _dork. Hope you don't mind my being your big, fat mess."

"Don't be silly, you aren't fat," Axel replied neutrally. "But, no offense love, you are a bit of a mess."

"I'm allowed to be a mess," said Roxas with a smirk. "Besides, I think I've been much less messier nowadays."

Axel pushed open the door to the rec room with his free hand.

"Yeah, I'd say you are."

"Hey! You made it!" Riku called jubilantly, "Leon thought for sure that you two were goners!"

"He's just deflecting," Axel called back easily. "Don't tell me nobody's noticed how far gone _he's _been with a certain someone we all know.'

Cloud popped his blonde head up over the bar (yes, the recreation room also included a full functioning bar) and threw a shot glass full of something or another toward Axel's head. He and Roxas both ducked and came back up laughing as it smashed against the wall.

"God damn it, Cloud!" Cid growled, "Throw an' empty one next time, eh? Alcohol's damn expensive!"

Demyx, who was holding Zexion on his lap, laughed out loud. "Oh snap!" he exclaimed, "At first I thought you were kidding!"

"Yeah, so did we," Roxas agreed.

Cloud started grumbling something unintelligible and disappeared behind the counter once again.

"They don't really like to talk about it," Tifa supplied as Leon grouched to some remote emo corner of the room.

"SCORE!" Sora shouted, remaining completely oblivious to all the other conversations occurring around the room. Everyone sniggered.

Cid, Tifa, Sora, Riku, Kairi, and Xion surrounded the pool table, and the others (Leon, Demyx, Zexion and Cloud) were spread about the room talking, drinking, and participating in all sort of general tomfoolery.

"Xion's just took Leon's place," said Sora, "If you like, you two can switch with Riku and I when the turn's over."

"Sure," Axel agreed, shrugging, "You better have some skills, dear coz," he said, addressing Kairi, "Cause me and Roxas suck at pool."

Roxas indignantly shouted, "Hey! I'm not that bad! I got one of the balls in the hole last—okay, I'm just gonna stop before you all go off and make innuendos about balls and sticks and holes and whatever else you crazy kids can come up with nowadays."

"Says the nineteen year old—oh, thanks, Cloud," said Axel, having just received his regular jack and coke from Cloud. "You wanna sip?"

It was meant to be teasing, but Roxas swatted his hands away and said determinedly, "Get me one of those."

"Uh, is that allowed?" Cloud asked Leon.

Leon shrugged. "Since we aren't technically in Hollow Bastion, nor affiliated with the Bastonian government, I don't see why not. We don't bother setting laws like that in our little dominion unless it's proven necessary."

"_Niiiiice," _said Sora who, Roxas found out shortly after arriving, was actually Axel's age. "Come and join the big boys!"

"Say Cloud!" Axel yelled. Cloud stopped what he was doing and looked up. "Do you remember Yuffie!"

"Do you know how to make her special?"

Cloud nodded.

"Whip one up for Roxy, please!" he shouted. Cloud gave him a thumbs-up.

Roxas tugged on his sleeve. "What's in Yuffie's special?"

Axel smirked. "A damn good time."

The remainder of the evening was spent inventing drinking games instead of playing pool; Axel's personal favorite being 'beer pool" instead of beer pong, which everyone forgot the rules to by morning. Roxas, as it turned out, was incredibly lightweight, and his evening included (but was not limited to): Karaoke on the pool table (which was actually so fantastic it earned him an audience of Xaldin and Merlin), having a samurai battle with Sora using pool sticks, taking body shots off of Axel, having Axel take body shots off of _him, _and finally managing to blow out all the light bulbs in the room with his overactive element.

As he and Axel walked (stumbled) back to their room at some ungodly hour in the morning, Roxas decided that life was okay. He had something to live for now, he had a purpose. He had somebody to _be, _and something meaningful and good to do with his time. It wasn't home, but there were people here who cared about him; and he cared about them. As it dawned upon him that he _had _made a new life here, he found himself happy that he did. There wasn't anything in the world he wouldn't trade in the world to have Naminé back, but the pain, it was becoming easier.

He knew that things wouldn't be able to stay this peaceful for long. They couldn't, not when his task to take down Xehanort loomed in the distance. But peace had been such a difficult thing to come by lately, he felt he deserved a break from pain.

And of course, he had Axel to help him through all of that.

He and the aforementioned redhead ended up collapsing on the same bed, and Roxas was just fine with that. He snuggled up close to his boyfriend's (boyfriend, waaah!) radiating body, and fell asleep just like that.

He was going to be okay.

**A/N: For those of you who forgot back from chapter six, Yuffie's special is made of cherry 7up, Vodka, Kahlua, and chocolate syrup. A recipe for Roxy fun!**

***Edit* My 100th reviewer shall receive a oneshot 8]**


	15. To Find Is To Lose

**A/N: I have no excuse. It's been like, a month and a half. I can't even begin to tell you how sorry I am for making you wait so long. I spit this out as fast as I could; I didn't even send it through my beta! (Don't worry, hun, you haven't been replaced. I still love you!) So if you find like, a shit-ton of errors, blame me. I'm sorry for being so unprofessional.**

**This chapter is **_**reeeeeeeeally **_**long, to make up for it. It was originally written as two chapters, but I was so **_**tired **_**of giving you guys fillers, fillers, fillers. After a wait like this, I'll be surprised if all of you haven't left me by now. Anyway, a lot of stuff happens in this chapter, including a little fanservice from yours truly.**

**So I tactfully changed my mind about the 100th reviewer thing. Instead, I picked a number between 95 and 105. Winner gets a oneshot. Go my babies, go! I realize that's almost like, whoring myself for reviews instead of a reward system like I originally planned, but it backfired. I really should've put that up when it was at like, 99. I really miss your reviews…**

**Disclaimer: do I really need to bother anymore?**

Christmas was, apparently, a great big to-do in The Castle That Never Was. This was due mainly to Sora's enthusiasm, which this year was partnered by Demyx and Xion's. For at least a week prior, the entire castle was decked out in twinkle lights, garlands, and mistletoe (much to Leon's dismay). Even Lexaeus had taken to roaming the halls, belting out Christmas carols however and whenever it suited him.

And for the first time since his arrival, Roxas would be allowed to visit the city, and see what's really become of it. While he was aware of the full extent of the damage inflicted (because of him), he had yet to see it with his own eyes. He and Cloud would also be allowed to call their parents.

On the morning of the special holiday, Axel was awoken by a loud, excited shriek. "Roxas! Axel! Cloud! Get your hot asses out of bed, _now. _It's Christmas morning!"

Axel cracked an eye open at the familiar voice of the intruder. Today it was Sora.

"Define 'morning,'" Cloud grumbled, turning over on his bunk (he'd reclaimed the bottom). Axel, for one, was not tired at all. In fact, he felt he'd definitely overslept. Everyone except Xion, Sora, and Demyx were ushered into the room at around six the previous day, and were told to sleep, for it'd be an early morning.

"Around four or five I think," Sora replied thoughtfully. Definitely an early morning. And while Axel and Roxas had heeded their advice (Axel knowing Demyx way too well to not take it) Cloud had not. "Don't be a bitch; Xaldin's making pancakes and cookies!"

At the mention of food, Cloud cracked an eye open. "Pancakes you say?"

Everyone had noticed the change in Cloud since he started seeing Leon. He was, if nothing else, just a _little _bit more lighthearted, and he spoke more often. Occasionally, if one was especially lucky, one could catch the glimmer of a smile.

He and Leon kept it very hush hush, though. It was imperceptible to the common eye that they were together, and had Axel not accidentally opened the door to his room to see them kissing once (much to their chagrin) he himself would have denied that such a relationship existed. They just appeared very buddy-buddy.

Sora kicked Axel and Roxas' bedframe. "Get uuuuup! Huh, you guys are real cute. Does Roxas always cuddle you in his sleep every night?"

Roxas decided to reply by flipping off Sora and burying his head deeper into Axel's collarbone.

Sora, unfazed, continued, "Come on, Roxy, you slept like, fifteen hours! I think…"

"Don't call me 'Roxy,'" the blonde mumbled at last.

Another body appeared behind Sora's, equipped with, dear god, a roll of toilet paper, a bag of glittering silver tinsel, and a bottle that read: _Super Tacky Super Glue._

"Oh good! They're up," Demyx murmured to himself, setting down his arsenal. "Hey! You guys are looking lively!"

Because the 100 watt compact bulb in the table lamp obviously wasn't enough to illuminate the room, Demyx flicked on the overhead light as well, effectively blinding Axel and forcing Roxas to pull the covers back over his head and burrow back down somewhere between the sheets and Axel's armpit.

"_Axeeeel,_" the blonde growled almost unintelligibly, "make them go away."

"Guys? Five minutes?" Axel asked with a forced apologetic smile. While being awake wasn't the problem anymore, he was slightly pissed at Demyx for being so darn pushy about it. Peaceful, happy moments with Roxas were still a new thing for him, and he wanted to enjoy every second he could. If Roxas wanted to take his time getting up and in the meantime give Axel some affection, who was he to deny that?

Demyx held up his hand, displaying his five fingers. "You have _exactly _five minutes. If you aren't in the cafeteria by the time I count five hundred seconds, I _will _come back here and _douse _you in _freezing _water. Don't think I haven't figured out how to manipulate the temperature."

"I'd listen to him, guys," said Zexion, who appeared behind his Pull, "He means business."

Everyone shuddered, even Sora, at the idea of being on the receiving end of one of Demyx's ambushes.

When all three intruders disappeared, Axel sat up, taking Roxas with him. Roxas' behavior was slightly confusing to him as he generally was a morning person and—admittedly, they did sleep quite a lot. Axel quickly remembered, however, that later in the day they were to be taking that field trip to Hollow Bastion. He'd almost forgotten, since he did odd jobs mostly every day. But this was big for Roxas, and Axel understood that, so he took to gently stroking Roxas' hair.

"You okay, love?" he asked quietly, "Did you sleep?"

"Hmm? Oh, yeah! No, I'm fine. I was just having a really nice dream. It's just that now when I try to think back on it, I keep coming up blank. Like I'm trying to remember specific elements of it all, hoping it'll come back, and then nothing. I can't remember a thing," said Roxas, sounding a little miffed.

"How do you know it was a good dream," Axel inquired, "if you can't remember it?"

Roxas shrugged. "It just was. Come on, I am _not _allowing myself to be splashed," he said, quickly rolling out of bed. That was one quirky thing about the blonde that Axel found absolutely adorable. He never sat up and stood to get out of bed; he always rolled sideways off and landed on his feet. Occasionally he landed elsewhere, like his behind, and it was times like those where even though it was at Roxas' expense, Axel at least got to start his day off with a laugh.

Fearing the worst, the redhead quickly followed suit. Cloud, surprisingly, had willed himself without any help from either of them to get up and leave, still wearing his pajamas. Since no one else had showed up fully clothed, it was silently agreed that they simply didn't have idle time to waste with things like getting fully dressed, bothering only enough to throw his hair into a haphazard ponytail.

Demyx was getting to his feet just as they arrived, and Axel had an ominous feeing that they would have been done for if they'd kept him waiting any longer.

"You guys are _so _lucky," he scolded, plopping back down between Lexaeus and Zexion, with whom he was sharing his perch, "You're late."

"You count quickly," Axel countered lazily, surveying the area.

The cafeteria was beyond recognition. The tables were all folded up and pushed to the far wall, and had been replaced by colossal beanie bag chairs. In the very center, a tree stood, stretching up almost as far as to brush against the ceiling. It was adorned with ornaments of every kind, and underneath it, appropriately, was a small pile of wrapped gifts. Ribbons were strewn across the ceiling, hung with wreaths and festive bows. Demyx had mentioned that they had about 1500 square feet of pure storage space up on the third floor, but until now, Axel had never taken him seriously.

"Oh _Cloooooud,"_ said Roxas in a smug, singsong voice. Hung from a stream precisely above where Cloud and Leon sat was a gleaming, pristine bouquet of white mistletoe.

A collective "oooooooh" rang throughout the cafeteria. Axel and Roxas had been the very last to arrive; everyone (in all manners of grogginess and irritability) except for DiZ had shown up to partake in the celebrations.

"You all did that on purpose!" Leon exclaimed, backing up several inches from Cloud.

"How could we?" Sora asked innocently, who was squashed between Riku and Kairi on a single beanie bag, "We just strategically placed that chair _exactly _where you two sit for your morning coffee. And if I recall correctly, Leon and Tifa were among the first to join us. We didn't tell you where to sit, we just hoped. It still would've been funny if like, Xaldin and Cid ended up there instead."

"Do you _want _to keep your dick?" Cid grouched.

"Come on Cloud, you gotta do it," Tifa taunted, who had her own seat neighboring Cloud and Leon's shared one.

"Oh my god, are they actually going to?" said Demyx in awe.

"Hell yeah, payback," said Axel, grinning.

"Oh for fuck's sake! Just come here already!" Cloud exclaimed, pulling a very surprised Leon into a much more heated and passionate than a "oh damn, we got caught under mistletoe" kiss, much to the shock and entertainment of their colleagues.

Sora, wide-eyed, broke the stunned silence by yelling, "Wait wait _wait! _You mean you guys are actually _together! _I thought everyone was just dicking around this whole time!"

"I didn't think Leon had the emotional capacity, to be perfectly honest," Merlin remarked.

"That's _hot_," said Tifa, her eyes aglow and super-glued to the kissing couple.

"Yeah, it is," Xion, Kairi, and Sora agreed together.

A deep crimson blush spread across Cloud's face as he shoved Leon away from him. He bashfully wiped his mouth off, though it looked more like a show for everyone else than for his own interest. "Are you all fucking happy now?" he asked irritably, allowing Leon to slip an arm around his waist.

"Yes. Hey Axel, could you give us a light?" asked Sora, gesturing to a collection of candles of all shapes and sizes, woven tightly together in the corner nearest everyone. "This was as close as we could get to a fireplace."

"Sure thing."

The fire came easily to him now. After weeks of practice, he didn't even have to think twice about it anymore. He could simply shut his eyes and wish the energy to gather, and it would. He could still feel it coursing through his veins, like adrenaline, but by now he'd attained a very high level of control. Should he wish it so, he could weave a thin tongue of flame between the limbs of any given person, provided they hold still.

Within seconds, the room was aglow with the luminous orangey flames, allowing them to turn off those awful florescent lights, leaving them only the candlelight, and the twinkle lights woven delicately around the tree.

"Thanks Axe. Come on, guys, let's open presents!"

Several people around the room hung their heads.

"We… we didn't get anyone presents, Sora," said Axel, feeling a bit ashamed of himself.

Sora's face fell a little. "How many of you skipped presents?"

Thankfully, Axel and Roxas weren't alone. About half the people in the room raised their hands, particularly the older ones.

"Awe, you grumpy old farts are no fun," Demyx whined.

"Eh, don't worry about it," said Xion, "That's not what Christmas is all about anyway."

"I'll pass them out," Axel suggested.

By Sora's ruling, nobody was allowed to open any gifts until every last one was passed out. To Axel's surprise, he ended up with a neat little pile, as did everyone else. After waiting for Xaldin to come out with the Christmas cookies, they dug into their gifts, noming passively at the treats and chatting idly with one another. When it was all said and done Axel ended up with: a book on Pyroklectisis from Zexion, a little ukulele from Demyx, a pair of black leather gloves from Tifa, some kind of dancing video game from Sora and Riku, respectively (which would go into the rec room for everyone to use) and lastly, a pretty little watch with a built in LED light from Xion, so he could tell the time in sunless mornings.

He couldn't keep the smile off his face as he looked around at the people that had almost become like a family to him. It wasn't really the presents in themselves that mattered so much to him, just the idea that he was important enough to these people for them to _want _to get him a gift.

"Oh my…" Roxas whispered beside him. "Axel, look!"

"That's from the three of us together," said Xion happily, pointing to herself and then to Sora and Demyx, "We thought it would be nice, since you spend your days in the library and all…"

Roxas, for once, moved just as fast of Xion could, tackling her in a cute little hug. "I love it, Xi! Thank you!"

Getting rather curious, Axel leaned over to where Roxas' head had been to get a view of whatever could possibly be inside the box. Nestled in what appeared to be a bundled little baby blanket, was a tiny black kitten, small enough to fit in the palm of Axel's hand. He—or she, Axel wasn't sure, was looking curiously up at him, and decided to pounce out the box to take a better look around. After a moment or two, it mewed softly (eliciting high pitched 'awwes' from the women), wiggles its little hindquarters, and leaped into Axel's lap, settling there for a nap.

"Look, he likes you!" said Sora happily.

"Probably only 'cause your temperature's always through the roof," Roxas joked affectionately, scooting back over to share the beanie bag with Axel. "Seriously, thank you guys!"

What started off as simple "thank you's" from everyone to each other eventually turned into a rousing battle of "Throw Your Tissue Paper and Wrappings at All of Your Friends and Use Your Element to Cheat." The kitten, meanwhile, tried chasing almost every piece of paper thrown, and occasionally, she (Axel had checked) actually caught one and pawed at it playfully. This was all frapping good fun, until a rather large gift bag ended up tossed in the candles, and Demyx had to put it out in order to keep the castle from setting ablaze. With no candles, Roxas had to provide a light, and it was then decided that it probably wasn't a good idea to play "Throw You Tissue Paper and Wrappings at All of Your Friends and Use Your Element to Cheat" anymore.

As soon as they finished their debate on whether it was Cloud who won (who had some very impressive powerful Jenova cells) or Lexaeus, the winner being Cloud, it was decided that it would probably be the best time to go to Hollow Bastion, given Roxas still wanted to go. By this time it was around eight thirty, and Axel could tell that if nothing else, Roxas was itching to see the sun again.

~o~

Axel, Roxas, and Cloud all got dressed in pretty much silence. Cloud, while having been able to leave the castle, had still not been allowed to stray far from _Poir. _He was in charge of taking inventory mostly, like documenting everything that came through and which supplies were meant to go to which part of the city. Otherwise, aside from a few delivery jobs, he had to remain in the clutches of, as he dubbed it, the "_Poir-thian _Forest."

Roxas was bubbling with anxiousness, and some excitement, he supposed. While he was looking forward to hearing his mom's voice again, he was still very scared to see what had really become of his city, the full extent of what he was responsible for.

"Hey Roxas, have you seen my cargo pants?" Axel asked abruptly, getting down on all fours to check under the beds.

"In the hamper" Roxas replied lazily, aiming a short kick to Axel's rear end, which was high up in the air.

Much to Roxas and Cloud's amusement, this caused Axel to squeal and knock his head against the metal bed frame. "Jeez, gimme a heart attack why don't ya," he grumbled, clutching the back of his head.

"You're already wearing pants, what do you need those for?" Roxas asked as Axel began rummaging through their pile of dirty clothes.

Less than seconds later, Axel apparently found what he was looking for. He let out a triumphant "ah ha!" and held up possibly the last thing Roxas expected.

Pinched between Axel's thumb and forefinger was a faded and slightly crumpled photo strip. A very specific photo strip. A certain photo strip that had been taken at a certain mall, which carried awkward pictures of a certain blonde and a certain redhead.

"Holy shit!" Roxas exclaimed, moving to snatch the incomplete strip from between Axel's fingers, "You actually _saved _this?"

Axel grinned. "Saved. Yes, literally, saved. Some nasty dusks tried to take it away from me."

Roxas made a face. "That's kind of strange," he mused, "That day that you and I went to the falls? All of my pictures went missing after that. Do you think maybe—oh!" his face lit up like a light bulb as a sudden realization dawned on him. "Photo!"

"Come again?" said Axel.

"Photo, photo!" Roxas replied impatiently waving his hands around. "That day, me and my friends couldn't actually _say _photo out loud. The dusks must have been there!" he snapped his fingers, "_That's _where all my stuff went to!"

Axel ran a hand through his hair. "Well, it's thanks to that little baby that I'm here. 'Cause if that dusk hadn't come along, or I didn't feel like chasing it, I wouldn't have found Leon, and me and Demyx would probably both be dead."

Roxas smiled as he looked down at the strip in question. "I wonder what they wanted it for…"

"Well, the dusks hunt by scent, don't they?" said Cloud, who Roxas had all but forgotten was still in the room with them. "That's what Leon told me. They probably couldn't distinguish between the real you and the things that smelled like you, resembled you. I'm surprised they didn't just pick Axel up and run away with him."

"That's pretty funny," said Axel, cocking an eyebrow. "Didn't know you told jokes…"

Cloud promptly shut up and left the room. Axel took the pictures back and pocketed them, linked hands with Roxas, and followed him.

The group leaving for Hollow Bastion congregated in the Gummi Hangar. They wouldn't be leaving that way, but there wasn't enough room in the transportation room for all of them to be inside at once.

The room was pretty much empty; the only people aside from the trio were Leon, Sora, Riku, Kairi, Xaldin and Cid.

"Hey people! Merry Christmas again!" said Axel cheerfully.

Kairi crossed the room and knocked into Axel with one of her bear hugs. "You too Axe!"

Axel and Kairi had formed something of a sibling-like relationship as of late, and even to Roxas she became like the sister he never had. Aside from her uncanny resemblance to Naminé, she had no qualities that he didn't like, and that was more than could be said about most of his companions.

"Hey guys, we're on guard duty today," Sora greeted, "So you get to cruise around with us! I'm so excited; I haven't seen the city in ages! You'd think I'd be paler, what from lack of sun and all—"

"All of you?" said Roxas, bewildered, "How are we all going to fit?"

"We are not accompanying you," said Xaldin, motioning to himself and Cid, "We're just here to work."

Indeed, now that Roxas looked, he and Cid were both already greased-stained and up to their ears in tools of which Roxas had never seen the liked of before. They were on their turf, after all. Nevertheless, their absence would make a tremendous difference in the amount of space they'd have in their vehicle.

"We're taking the van," said Leon. "It's the sturdiest thing we have, and we'll all fit easily."

"Just like old times, eh?" said Axel, nudging Roxas.

Since when were old times a mere few months ago?

"Yeah, like old times…"

_~o~_

The difference between the city Roxas had left and the city they were driving through was astounding. The north side was not hit nearly as bad as the south (which did not go unnoticed by Roxas), particularly public places and plazas. The worst places were residential; homes and apartment buildings alike were torn apart and decorating the streets, reduced only to rubble.

On many main roads, the asphalt had been uplifted, making them uncrossable, even in Leon's van. Wrecked cars littered the sidewalks and, in more severe case, had been either crushed by or had driven into the buildings themselves. Cracks ran intricately through windshields like spider webs, leaving broken glass glittering on the ground like little diamonds.

What perhaps affected Roxas most of all was the sheer amount of people there were in the streets. All of the dead bodies had been removed (Roxas had thrown together the procedure himself) but the streets were still crowded with families, small and large, that had lost their homes during the catastrophe, with nowhere to go. Leon and the others had been able to set up several shelters around the city in correlation with the Bastonian government, and many hotels were opening up vacant rooms free of charge, but that still wasn't enough. It was just impossible to rectify a disaster of this magnitude overnight.

Roxas couldn't shake the feeling that this was all his fault. All of the cold, starving families, all the people that now lie in mass graves, without so much as a _name, _they were in his hands. The Nobodies had been after _him. _All of those innocent lives, and for what? Just one sexually confused college kid? He knew there wasn't a way he possibly could have prevented it, but that didn't stop the guilt that ate away at his conscience.

"What did you tell them?" Roxas asked Leon, who was driving.

"What do you mean?" asked Leon.

"The people. They had to have been told something. Mass hysteria has already become a problem; obviously we couldn't tell them the truth. So, what does the public think happened here? Terrorists again, like last time? War? Natural fucking disaster?"

"We told them that landmines had been placed throughout the city back when the Olympians invaded, decades ago, and that sudden shifts in the planet's tectonic plates caused them all the detonate without warning," said Leon gravely.

Roxas' jaw dropped. "And they _bought _that!" he asked incredulously, "The Olympians don't even _manufacture _landmines!"

"I know that, Roxas," said Leon, "The Prime Minister of Olympus has been notified of the situation and has agreed to go along with it, for the time being, given we make sure they don't get an uprising of their own."

Roxas laid his head against the window. "Makes you wonder what else the government has covered up through history…"

"In cases such as these, it's better to keep the truth from the people, for the good of everyone," said Leon, "Besides, do you really think that the public would sooner believe the truth if we told it to them the way we've told it to you?"

Thinking back, Roxas realized just how ludicrous it'd sounded to him at the time. Telling the people such a thing would only create anger and distrust.

Axel reached out to take his hand. "You okay?" he whispered soothingly.

Roxas was not particularly "okay." He was hurt, saddened, and enraged at all of the suffering dealt upon innocent people. He was full to the brim with so many emotions, and just by having a penis he simply wasn't built to deal with that. It was overwhelming, and it made him want to scream. But he wanted to talk about it even less. So he nodded, and Axel let it drop.

There wasn't a doubt in his mind that Axel knew how upset he was. He was thankful that they'd achieved such a level of understanding that Axel could sense when he didn't want to talk, and would simply not press the matter any further. Roxas dealt with heavy emotions very rarely, and he expressed them out loud even more scarcely. But they both knew that when he wanted to discuss it, he would, and he would do it _loudly, _and irritably, but ultimately, he would gain comfort.

Cloud, who sat in the front seat, asked, "How much further?"

"Not too long." It was Riku who'd replied. "The restoration site is on the eastern border of the city. Normally, it could take a good two hours to get there, as _Poir _is on the west end. But… as you can see," he gestured to the vacant streets, "it's not like we have traffic to avoid anymore."

They did, however, have to maneuver between and around roadblocks, and had to detour through side streets, as the main roads were the most badly hit. People knew and respected the silver van, and they took great care in staying out of its way.

Roxas could tell immediately when they'd arrived. The "restoration site" was little more than an abandoned warehouse. Well, not abandoned anymore. It was surrounded by people. People trying to get in, people passing out food, people peddling for clothing. Clothing! Makeshift signs everywhere were up advertising places to get free showers, housing and food. The cleaner and better kept ones, Roxas noticed, were more often than not the ones giving out blankets and food, and presumably offering shelter.

"There's an office inside you can call from," said Leon, "It's the safest place for you to be, and conveniently, it's the only place inside that gets any kind of satellite reception."

He caught eyes with Roxas in the rearview mirror, and in turn Roxas nodded in thanks. When they pulled up to the entrance, Sora and Kairi got out first.

"We have to go through without Leon," Sora explained, "because everyone knows he's in charge. We'll be able to make it from one side to the other a whole lot faster if we slip you in discreetly."

"Take this," said Leon, handing Cloud the satellite phone.

Axel and Roxas hopped out behind them and as a group, they made for the entrance quickly.

Once inside, the smell alone brought bile to Roxas' throat. The smell of sweaty, dirty people was mixed in with blood and retch and god knows what else. Rotting flesh from the wounded, human waste, and burnt clothing were only some of the putrid smells adding to the horrendous stench.

Inside was the entire community Roxas had helped set up. On one side of the room, people were lined up to get cheap sludge they called food. On the other, an infirmary for those who had neither the means nor the money to get to the hospital. Everywhere else, people were huddled into small groups, sharing blankets and anything else they had. It brought Roxas incredibly close to tears. How could such a thriving city be reduced to this, in a matter of only hours? How long would it be before all of these people were in homes again?

"This way," said Sora, leading them through the throng. Roxas took a quick breath of the relatively cleaner air before diving headfirst into the madness.

When they arrived at the aforementioned office, Axel, Sora and Kairi hung back.

"We'll give you some privacy," said Kairi, shutting Cloud and Roxas into the office.

It was a tiny, cramped little space. It was shaped like a triangle and had only enough room for a desk with a computer in it and some filing cabinets. One wall was one giant window, and as the office was up some stairs some, it gave them a great visual of the crumbled world around them.

Roxas tore his eyes away from the scene and turned to Cloud. "You know the number?"

"Course I do," said Cloud, who began dialing.

As it was a Saturday morning AND Christmas, his parents (who were schoolteachers) had no excuse not to be home. After a few rings, Roxas' suspicions were confirmed as his mother's voice leaked through the loud speaker.

"Hello?"

It was her monotonous, businesslike "hello" that she saved for numbers she assumed were telemarketers, if she even picked them up at all. But behind that, Roxas could hear the grief and fatigue in her voice.

"Merry Christmas, mom," he choked out.

He could hear her crying hysterically on the other end, mixed with the occasional blubber of "_honey, it's Roxas!"_ or "_oh, my baby, my baby_" as well as some other non-intelligible things. It took her a good two minutes to collect herself and say something articulate to them.

"_Baby, are you okay? Are you hurt? Is Cloud with you?"_ she said shakily. Roxas felt her voice tugging at him in a way only a mother's could, and he felt terrible for putting her through so much.

"Yeah, Cloud's here, he's with me," said Roxas.

Cloud then leaned closer to the phone and said, "I'm here Ma, we're both okay."

Their dad's voice became recognizable. "_Cloud? Roxas? What's going on over there?"_

"Hi Pop," said Cloud, "Things have pretty much gone to hell here. You wouldn't believe the mess."

"We're sorry it took us so long to contact you," Roxas added, "The trouble it took to get to a phone was ridiculous. M-mine was in our building when it came down."

His mother gasped in shock. "_The building came down! Everyone got out okay though, right? Xion? Naminé? Nam's parents are worried sick!"_

Roxas' heart sank. How was he supposed to tell his parents, _her _parents, that their daughter was never coming home? He didn't even have a _body _to give them. She was long gone, gone forever, in body and soul.

He couldn't help himself. Tears were spilling over his cheeks now and he was doing his best not to start sobbing.

"Xion's safe," Cloud assured them, silently pulling Roxas close to him in a one-armed embrace.

"_And Naminé?"_

Roxas had to clutch Cloud for full support now. "She c-couldn't get out!" he hiccupped, "T-the building g-got hit and…" he cleared his throat, trying to make better sense of himself and quit the sobbing. "There's not even a trace of her. D-disintegrated, they told me."

He cried silently into Cloud as his mother took in the lie he told her. And he'd been doing so well…

"_Oh no. No no no no __**no**__!" _she cried.

"_Are you sure, son?_" his dad asked. His parents had known her parents long before she and Roxas had started seeing each other. Especially in recent years, she had become something of a child to them.

"Positive," said Roxas, S-she was gone, before the building even came down. I-I saw the body myself, before…" he didn't finish. He'd said all he had to.

"_When can you two come home!_" his mom howled in despair, "_I want my babies home!"_

"Mom, you know as well as I do that the trains are out of commission," said Cloud, "We'll be okay, okay? It's a promise. We just recently managed to join a volunteer help committee. That's how we were able to get ahold of a phone."

The rehearsed lie passed through his lips so smoothly, and in that instant Roxas knew what Leon had meant about protecting people from the truth.

Cloud continued, "So don't worry. We're safe, and we're doing our best to help others. And Xion too."

"_As soon as those trains are working, the __**instant**__ you aren't trapped on that planet, I want you boys home! You hear me, Cloud Strife?"_

"Yes mum," he replied automatically.

"_Roxy, can you still hear me? Everything's gonna be okay, baby. I promise. Na—…she's in a better place now. God has lifted her soul, and she's in a place where it doesn't hurt,"_ she said soothingly, "_So try not to be too sad, okay?"_

"Okay…" he said quietly.

"_How long can you stay for?"_

Roxas wasn't actually sure if they had a time limit. Kairi and Axel and Sora we're probably either very busy or very bored. But he didn't want to let go of his mom and dad just yet.

"A little while longer."

Eventually they got over the serious stuff and just got talking, two-on-two. It wasn't until Kairi poked her head in briefly that Roxas realized an entire hour had gone by. He took that as a sign that the others were waiting and that it was time to go.

"We gotta go," Roxas said reluctantly, "Other people have to use the phone, you know?"

"_Of course,_" his dad said in a soothing voice, "_We love you, okay? Hayner, Pence, and Olette too. We'll make sure to tell them you're okay."_

"Love you too," said Roxas. Cloud was the one to hang up.

It wasn't until then that Roxas realized just how much he missed his mom. He missed her laugh, and her hugs, and just the simple knowledge that she was there for him, and that she loved him unconditionally. Her voice alone reminded him of days not so long ago, when things were happy, and easy, and his biggest problem was knowing he had to clean his room before they'd give him the car keys. Now that she was gone again, he was thrown back into the present, where people were dead, or dying. Where there was tragedy and harm. Where the fate of the world rested on his shoulders.

"Mommy…" he said pathetically, like a little kid. He didn't want to cry again in front of Cloud, or at all for that matter. He was a man for goodness' sake, and he'd have to get over that shit just happens, and now it's time to go out and slay some assholes, because that was what was right. So he swallowed the lump in his throat, and put on his war face (figuratively, of course) as he exited the office.

Sora and Kairi had not strayed too far, and Axel was waiting at the bottom of the stairs, balancing a very small child on his hip. She was a little girl, one who looked to be about two or three years old.

"She lost her big sissy," Axel explained, while awkwardly trying to bounce her back up so as not to drop her. He looked like he had no clue what he was doing, and honestly, it was adorable. If they lived in a perfect world and led a normal life, right about now Roxas would be entertaining the idea of getting a little girl of their own.

"I can take her," said a soft feminine voice. Roxas turned around to see a young woman approaching them. She had wide eye and a good natured face, with long, chocolate brown hair pulled together into a neat little pink bow. Roxas didn't recognize her, but Axel seemed to.

"_Aerith!" _he exclaimed, startling the poor kid.

She smiled at him as she took the child from him with practiced arms.

"I'm not sure if we know each other," she said, a mild curiosity touching her voice, "Have we met?"

"Alex, I mean, Axel," the redhead replied, smirking at the intentional mistake.

She didn't even blink, but her gaze did flash down to lock onto two hands, clasped together. They lingered there only a moment, but the comprehension that registered in her eyes did not go unnoticed by Roxas. "It's wonderful to meet you," she said with a wide, wide smile.

She winked at them before turning around and walking off, graceful even with a child in her arms.

"Who was that?" asked Roxas, looking to his Pull.

Axel shrugged. "Somebody I met awhile back. She helped me out of a pretty sticky situation."

"Oh really?"

Roxas got the feeling that Axel wasn't telling him the whole truth, and that he wouldn't get much more out of him anyway, so he let the subject drop. He wasn't particularly inclined to know Axel's entire life story, so if he felt like not sharing something, he could knock himself out.

Sora and Kairi each left the small groups they'd been sitting with to approach the couple.

"All set?" Sora questioned. Cloud and Roxas nodded.

It took much longer to get out than it did to go in, as they were going against traffic. The group remained pretty much silent; allowing the overpowering noise of hundreds of people to fill their ears. Roxas thought quite a bit, about everything.

"When will it be safe enough to go home?" Roxas asked quietly.

Sora chose his words carefully. Roxas could tell. "It depends, I guess," he started, "If you mean home in Twilight Town, maintaining a permanent residence will be tricky. They know your name, and they might know your face. As long as they're hunting you, nowhere you go is safe. Just today I've already seen a couple of dusks hanging around. They're doing recon, just like we are. They're going to go to Twilight Town next, if they haven't already. We have people there, just like Midgar and Destiny Islands, to protect your family—"

"But how am I supposed to tell my mom I can't come home without telling her the truth?"

Sora frowned. "I know this isn't easy for you, Roxas. But sometimes, there just isn't a way. I know you don't want her to worry about you, but what can we do, really? What's the alternative to the truth once the trains start working again? Prison? Death?"

"Are you saying we should tell her I'm _dead?_" Roxas growled.

Axel gave his hand a sharp squeeze. "Calm down, love."

"Easier to do it now, while there's a chance that one day, you could go back to them," said Sora, "instead of giving them false hope when you might not—"

"_Enough,_" said Axel hotly.

Sora hung his head, "Sorry…"

What he said was really affecting Roxas. Never go home? As in, stay and live with them forever? Or, die trying to protect the universe? As far as he could see, the only way out of this was death. Whether it be dealt by his hands, or by someone else to him, _someone _had to die from him to get out of this. He wouldn't be able to go home until the nobodies were defeated.

Suddenly it clicked inside him. _Oh. Duh. _That's _why _he was with the resistance in the first place, wasn't it? That's what they'd been telling him from day one. _Learn to use a Keyblade. Kill Xehanort. Undermine and destroy an age-old group of evil-doers. Also, everything you've ever been told is a lie. You're the only one who can do this. Kill, or be killed… _It's what they needed him for. Behind the steady friendships he thought were starting to form, the group still had the ulterior motives for keeping him around. Maleficent's prophecy.

Not that he _minded _helping; he didn't even mind living there anymore. What he hated was the fact that he couldn't _choose _to help, couldn't _choose _to live there. He didn't have the choice. None. Zip. They weren't holding him against his will, as Leon liked to remind him, but leaving meant certain death.

"I don't have a choice, do I?" he croaked as Leon's van pulled up to the entrance.

"You always have a _choice_," Sora pressed, "Just… one option means… dying, and the other one, heh, the other one doesn't…"

"Right…"

Sora remained uncharacteristically silent, for once, as they entered the van and readied to head back h—to the castle. As comfortable as Roxas had become living there, he refused to call the castle home. Home was where his parents were. Where his friends were. Where Naminé was.

He was, essentially, homeless. He didn't want to accept that he'd built a life without the people that were truly important. It was like forgetting them; like moving on and leaving them all behind.

Home is where the heart is, but Roxas' heart seemed split. One part of it, a rapidly growing part of it, had given its allegiance over to Axel, and Axel seemed to be giving his in exchange. Which was all fine and dandy, but the other part adamantly remained in Twilight Town, and that's where Roxas wanted it to stay.

Right?

He leaned against Axel, who accepted him into his arms immediately. He shut his eyes and let himself melt into the redhead's warmth. Axel had a very comforting grasp, but every time Roxas found himself being cuddled, he surprised himself, because no matter how hard he looked, he couldn't find any resentment. It was like all the anger he had had dissipated, leaving him with nothing but acceptance. It was almost odd to find himself there, after such a roller coaster ride of a relationship. Acceptance was still a new concept to him. He wasn't exactly sure how to go about it.

But he figured, having a nice healthy cuddle time in the back seat of a van was a pretty good place to start.

He wanted to know what Axel was thinking about. Often the redhead didn't talk much, especially not now like he used to. It made Roxas curious.

In the passing weeks, Roxas had somewhat learned to harness a certain degree of control over his psychic abilities, particularly his telepathic ones. He wondered if…

He shut his eyes an allowed the power to gather in his forehead. He could feel it all the time now, traveling through him like blood coursed through his veins. It was like a fire had erupted inside him the first time he found his light, and since then, in times where he did not need to use it, it smoldered, like charcoal.

Probing around for another mind was like trying to find something in the dark; he had to feel around the empty air for it. Actually, more or less it was like trying to find a ringing alarm clock in the darkness, because he could _sense _everyone around him. Getting in tune with their particular aura was the tricky part. He pushed his mind to go a bit further, a bit further, until finally—

_Aha! _He picked up Axel's radiant frequency, and so far that fact remained undetected by the redhead. It wasn't an exactly science, and for the moment, Roxas couldn't pick up actual streams of though. However, an array of emotions and ideas seemed to be flowing into him; including Christmassy cheer, comfort, nostalgia, worry, fear, and… dear god, _love. _

Axel loved him.

An overwhelming amount of affection surged up in his chest at the new information, and he was glad Axel wasn't looking at him, because surely in would be showing on his cheeks. He was a little worried that Axel might detect the change in his heartbeat, but so far it was as if nothing had change.

Love… the word prompted several feelings on Roxas' part. Uncertainty, some. Fear, admittedly. Happiness, absolutely.

Reciprocation? Probably.

He was faced with a growing desire to just _kiss _Axel. Not to particularly jump him or anything… just a kiss. Although, he supposed that would be kind of weird, given the tension was still thick from the last conversation, and to Axel, it'd seemingly be brought on by _nothing _at all. And they were in company—

Without warning, Axel decided for them. He reached a few fingers underneath Roxas' chin, murmured "come here," and tenderly brought their lips together.

It was possibly the sweetest kiss Roxas had ever experienced in his life; it only lasted about four seconds.

After making sure he was withdrawn completely from Axel's mind, he thought to himself, _Did I just do that?_

"What was that for?" he asked, genuinely curious.

Axel shrugged, "Just wanted to," he said easily.

Interesting…

The telltale rocky road told them that they were approaching _Poir_. He didn't want to go back yet. He hadn't breathed enough fresh air, hadn't seen enough of the sun. What he wouldn't give to see a Twilight Town sunset right now. Or have a taste of sea salt ice cream…

He shook the ideas out of his head, deciding instead to look forward to celebrating more Christmas with everyone. As long as he didn't think of home too often, he could keep himself relatively happy. He and Axel were the last to exit the van when it finally pulled up to the burnt down _Poir _(which now had support beams set up all around it to keep it from collapsing in on itself.)

Roxas said one last goodbye to sun as they entered the building and headed for the basement. One uncomfortable warp later, and he and Axel were heading back to their rooms, while everyone else went to do who knows what. Honestly, Roxas would have preferred to go to the rec room with everyone, but Axel was leading, so he followed along.

When the door was shut behind them, Axel shook his head and blinked.

"Honestly, I don't know why I brought us in here," he admitted. "I guess the transition from afternoon to total blackness had me thinking it was nighttime."

A sudden thought struck Roxas. A sudden reckless, happy though. A sudden _naughty _thought. He smirked and gave a false chuckle. "Well you know, Axe, I'm not tired _at all._"

Now, Roxas loved him (he thought(he hoped)) but Axel was dense. He flopped right down on the bed, resting his head up against the headboard and sighed, "Yeah well, I figured that much, silly. What do you want to do then?"

"Maybe," Roxas replied, feeling rather brave at the moment, "We can spread around some Christmas cheer?" As the words left his mouth, he climbed onto their bed and approached Axel on his knees.

Understanding finally struck the redhead as his face morphed into a sexy little grin. He propped himself up on his elbows as Roxas began crawling over his legs. "Yeah?"

"Mhmm."

Roxas didn't know why or how the idea decided to materialize in his skull, but the fact remained that it had. He wanted Axel, and he wanted him _now. _Which made seducing his Pull a top priority.

But Axel didn't really need all that much seducing, apparently, because he seemed utterly transfixed with Roxas. He was touching him everywhere, and Roxas was touching back. Roxas was still scooting forward, inch by inch, when Axel abruptly shifted his legs up, causing Roxas to tumble down closer to Axel's stomach. It brought him inches away from the redhead's face.

"Well hi there," he said giddily, "Fancy meeting you here."

Axel coyly lifted his hand up, gesturing with his pointer finger for Roxas to "come hither."

All Roxas could think was _yes sir! _as he swooped his head down to meet Axel's in a heavy, bruising kiss. There was nothing sweet or tender about it, not like in the van. This was full of heavy gasping and panting and grunting. Axel knew exactly how to drive his crazy. He would push his tongue out to meet Roxas', but barely. An oh-so-soft brush of the tongue, so to speak, before retracting it again. Roxas, desperate for a taste, would whimper and try harder. Axel could _tease _with his _tongue. _And he was doing it shamelessly.

_Oh, I'll show you who's a tease,_ Roxas thought to himself. Without breaking the feverish kiss, he slowly started to rock his hips, back and forth, because at some point they had ended up straight on top of Axel's. The friction it created was far too much for his Pull, and almost too much for himself. Stopping himself was a bother, but it finally got the message across, because Axel decided then to take full control. He stopped his teasing and swept his tongue thoroughly and greedily through the other's mouth. Roxas let out a tiny squeak as Axel's hands slid down to cup his ass.

When he initiated this, Roxas wasn't quite sure how far he wanted to take it, but he did know that he was turning on, _fast. _He had resumed his shallow grinding and his hands, having a will of their own, had taken on the task of exploring the defined muscles hidden underneath Axel's t-shirt.

Axel, meanwhile, had disconnected their lips and was doing _incredible _things to his neck. It was almost embarrassing, really, to be a full grown man and whimpering softly and arching his back just to try to get more closeness, to get more Axel.

His shirt was halfway off, and his hands seemed to be trailing lower down Axel's frame when their bedroom door swung right open and in walked Cloud.

Roxas froze, staring at his brother in horror.

"Cloud!" He screamed once he could find his voice, "What the hell are you _doing _in here! Go away!" Roxas growled. Axel, who'd remained oblivious until Roxas spoke up, let his lips leave the blonde's neck so he could observe the situation.

Cloud sniggered, "Well, I was _just _about to leave and tell the others you were busy. But now that I think about it, it would be irresponsible to let my poor, virginous baby brother get into such trouble, wouldn't it?"

"Go fuck Squall why don't ya!" Roxas yelled. To Axel he added in an undertone, "We could ignore him…"

"I'll tape it," Cloud threatened with a sadistic smirk, "I'll tape it and play it in the cafeteria at breakfast tomorrow. Don't you think I won't; Demyx salvaged an old projector from the storage room, and I'm not above using—wait a sec, who's Squall?"

Axel cocked an eyebrow. "You don't know your boyfriend's name? What, did you think it was Leon Leonhart?"

"Demyx says get down to the pool room now," Cloud replied quickly, "And I'll be back in about five minutes with a video camera and an attitude, you better be clear."

Without another word, he turned on his heel and left the room, leaving Axel and Roxas half-laughing, half-panting on each other.

"I _hate _you!" Roxas groaned after him, rolling off of Axel and onto the bed next to him. He was _not _looking forward to changing into swim trunks with a half hard dick, no sir.

Axel, however, seemed more or less unperturbed, and got off the bed to do as he was told. Roxas briefly considered locking the door, but one of Cloud's many psyche talents was telekinesis, and Roxas knew full well that he could unlock the door when the mood struck him. And the mood had obviously stricken.

Changing in the same vicinity of the redhead had never been a problem. They always changed with their backs to one another, always. As silly as it sounded, Roxas had still never seen _all _of Axel. And as far as he knew, the same went for Axel.

Needless to say, when he slid his sweatpants off and felt a pair of arms wrap around him from behind, he was rather startled indeed.

"Axel, wha—?"

"You know, one time, when I was seventeen and hormonal, I timed myself to see how fast I could get myself from start to finish," Axel said in a matter-of-fact tone. "One minute, eighteen seconds."

Roxas felt his face heat up as his heart began jumping through his chest. There was no getting anything by Axel, was there? At the same time he felt oddly at ease. Being completely exposed to Axel, even in this state, wasn't as uncomfortable as he thought it ever would be. Nor was the idea of getting a hand job at the moment. Or even giving one.

"Yeah?" Roxas breathed, "I got twenty-four seconds on you. Wanna race?"

The arms tightened, and Roxas was pushed up against a very nude, very aroused Axel. "_Hell_ yes I do."

A kiss and a half later, they were sitting on the hardwood floor across from each other, Indian style, each with one hand reached across to rest in the other's lap. Roxas couldn't deny that it was slightly awkward, but by now he was far too turned on to care. Time was a-ticking, and they had to finish before Cloud came back. Or at the very least, before he had time to start recording anything of value.

"Together," Axel murmured huskily.

"Together," Roxas agreed.

His shyness evaporated as soon as Axel's hand started moving. He could do nothing but stare, out of half lidded eyes, at his Pull's expressions of pleasure. He hardly noticed his own hand moving; he'd told himself to think of it like doing it to himself, just to another person. They moved in perfect synchronization, so he might as well have been. But it wasn't his hand, stroking firmly across his length. It was Axel's, and that made all the difference.

As delectable Axel's sex faces were, Roxas could no longer keep himself from exposing his throats to the heavens. Every time he needed more, he upped his own speed, and Axel would comply. Little grunts and groans were coming from the redhead, the noises bringing Roxas closer and closer by the second.

Even though the object of the exercise was to get Axel off as quickly as possible, and vice versa, he couldn't help but feel a little bit alarmed when the need to finish built inside him like water against a dam. It had barely been a minute, if that! It was certainly not the best way to prove how well he could perform in bed. Then again, he didn't really know how well he could perform in bed.

"Almost—Roxas," Axel gasped, quickening his pace on Roxas' shaft. The sudden change was so unexpected, but that made it all the better. Roxas found himself panting like a dog as he struggle to comply to Axel's needs. It was becoming harder to focus. His fingers were smeared with Axel's precum and he was getting all sweaty and gross, but this was by far better than any jerking off he'd ever done.

The orgasm came without warning. It quaked through his body, depositing its spoils onto the floor between them. Axel followed behind maybe ten seconds, mixing his own love juice into the puddle on the floor.

A moment was taken only to breathe, when a sudden thought struck Roxas. He gave out a shaky laugh.

"What's up?" Axel questioned, still catching his own breath.

"You weren't kidding," said Roxas. When Axel gave him a blank look, he continued, "Your hair… it is natural."

They laughed together a moment, then, using a nearby shirt, disposed of the evidence of their… playtime, so to speak. Axel was first to stand up, offering Roxas a hand. Roxas was suddenly reminded of the first time they'd met, all those mornings ago. Axel looked exactly the same, with his hair tied back the same way and everything. Whereas Roxas felt like he'd changed so completely. Who'd have guessed that something so good could come out of Axel's clumsiness? Despite everything he'd been through, Roxas decided that yes, stumbling across Axel (literally) and fucking his entire life up had to be a good thing. He wouldn't be so happy otherwise, right? Right.

~o~

The swimming pool was probably Axel's favorite place in the castle. Nothing could calm a troubled mind like a therapeutic dip. Not that Axel was troubled, but it was relaxing nonetheless. The room itself had a _very _high, hexagonal ceiling, and the walls were white and tiled, rather than the bland gray alloy that seemed to cover the majority of the castle. When lit, the pool was a magnificent blue, and it spanned much further than the average size.

Everyone had waited up for them, and it was decided when Roxas performed an ungraceful cannonball that it was okay to play. Everyone except Merlin (who had opted to watch the cat) showed up, and now began jumping in all at once, either around or on top of one another.

There was only one problem. Axel didn't know how to swim.

He knew he wouldn't be able to get away with it for long, but he sat around at the pool's edge and kept his feet in pleasantly warmed water, waiting for the inevitable moment when someone would realize he wasn't dunking them.

Before long, Roxas popped his little head out of the water, right in front of him. It was something of an amusing sight. As it turned out, Roxas' hair _did _go flat when wet, at least, if he were fully submerged. It hung straight and soaked and plastered against his face.

"What are you still doing way out here, silly?" he asked playfully, splashing water at Axel. Without warning, the blonde grabbed him by the ankles and dragged him into the water, "All the fun is this way!"

"Ahh!" Axel yelled, clinging to the edge for dear life, "No wait!"

"What's wrong?" Roxas asked blankly, releasing his ankle, "It's not like you could possibly be on your period or anything."

Despite his fear, Axel had to roll his eyes. "N-no. Rox, I can't swim."

"Huh? But, that day… at the falls—"

"I lied," he said, "I was just really, really hoping I wouldn't fall in."

Roxas bit down on his lip. "How come?"

"Jesus! I had a crush on you, I didn't want you to think I couldn't even swim!" said Axel exasperatedly.

To his surprise, Roxas was giggling innocently at him. A giggling Roxas. That was more than he'd ever hoped to achieve.

"Well," the blonde started, "It's never too late to learn, right? It's really _not _hard at all. Despite being 95% water, wild red Axels are surprisingly buoyant. Very capable of floating in the water. It's all about learning how to propel yourself."

Hesitantly, Axel let go of the wall to find that Roxas was right; he was _much _more buoyant than he'd realized. While at this point he was still frantically doing the doggy paddle to keep his head and shoulders out of the water, at least he wasn't sinking.

"Relax," Roxas instructed, "You don't have to be so far out of the water. I know it feels like you're sinking, but I promise you aren't. It's about five and a half feet deep here, anyway. You can bounce on your toes easily."

Axel nodded determinedly, gripping Roxas' shoulder with one hand and allowing himself to lower fluidly towards the bottom. The water rose to just below his chin when he felt his toes touch.

"See?" said Roxas who, being as short as he was, was still treading water. "It's not that bad."

It wasn't that bad. If he could shoot flaming balls of fire by snapping his fingers, he could definitely learn to do this. He was just beginning to get the hang of treading water, when Demyx decided it would be a good idea to make a wave pool.

It rocked Axel back and forth, and was threatening to sweep him away to the deepest waters.

Panicking, he shouted, "Demyx, stop!"

"Why?" Demyx called jubilantly. Axel had never told him he couldn't swim, either.

"_He can't swim!" _Roxas called frantically, holding on to Axel and trying to keep him where he could still stand. They were torn apart by the waves and Roxas was swept toward the shallow end, while Axel was pulled closer to the diving board.

Suddenly, the waters calmed.

And Demyx was staring at them, utterly confused.

"I didn't do that," he said, looking wildly back and forth between everyone. "I didn't even hear what you guys said. I don't know what happened…"

Roxas was still breathing heavily, his eyes shut and his hands clenched into fists. He was completely still, yet he wasn't sinking any further, and quick ripples were expanding in rings around him. Axel, using the wall as a guide, made his way over to him to make sure he was all right.

"Roxas was trying to tell you that I couldn't swim," Axel told Demyx. "Are you okay, Roxy?"

"I think," said Roxas, starting to move again, "I think _I _did that. I feel… really fucking tired."

Axel looked around at everyone, who had stopped what they were doing to observe the situation. "Could I maybe get some help here?"

Demyx sent them on a tiny little wave back towards the stairs on the very shallowest section of the pool, where Axel could traverse easily and set Roxas down properly.

"What did you do?" he asked in awe. Nobody, as far as he knew, had ever used multiple elements before. Cloud could do some pretty crazy shit, but his only element was light, like his brother.

"I don't know," said Roxas, shaking his head, "I just panicked.

Demyx swam over to help, accompanied by Zexion and Lexaeus. The threesome had become almost inseparable, much like how Sora, Riku, and Kairi were, are Cloud, Leon and Tifa.

"Are you two okay?" asked Demyx. When he received matching nods from the couple, he smacked Axel lightly on the shoulder, "You never told me you couldn't swim! What about at our one-year? We totally went skinny dipping at the one hotel! Remember? We climbed the fence—"

"Dem!"

"Sorry…"

Axel felt his face heat up. "First of all, it wasn't our one-year, it was two. Second, the pool was only six feet deep to begin with, and if you remember correctly we pretty much stuck to the shallow end. And third, _please _show a little discretion! We're surrounded by Jelly Bellies."

Indeed, both Zexion and Roxas were close to fuming, each glaring at their boyfriends' ex.

"Roxas, what did you do?" Lexaeus asked before Demyx could open his mouth again, his voice alert with fear and concern.

"I-I think I was trying to send Demyx like, a mental warning or something," Roxas replied, his eyes shut like he was straining to remember. "I _thought _I'd gotten through, but instead it was like… like _I _was being filled with water. I kind of just panicked and thought _stop, stop, stop! _and everything did."

The others were beginning to approach to see what the big fuss was about.

"Did you feel anything, Demyx?" Lexaeus asked.

Demyx shook his head. "I had no clue what was happening until it was over."

Leon, Lexaeus, Zexion, and Riku all exchanged wary looks.

"This has never happened before," said Leon. "We need to discuss it, study it further. It seems as though we've underestimated you again, chosen one. This could indicate some sort of connection between your psychic abilities and the shadow-throwers."

"Did I do something wrong?" Roxas asked irritably.

"It's never wrong to act on instinct, especially when someone else is in danger," Zexion reassured him, "It's just, we don't _know. _We have no idea what we're dealing with, and that's why we need to figure out the _full _extent of your abilities, so we can document them and, more importantly, make sure you know how to control them. It _might _just be that you have power over multiple elements, but there's no way to know for sure yet. You might have tapped into Demyx's lifestream just now, and harnessed his own energy, and that's what concerns us. If that's the case, you could be, potentially, a very dangerous threat to all of us. We just don't want any dusks."

"I understand," said Roxas shakily.

What must it be like, Axel wondered, to have to fear oneself? To be at a constant risk of hurting the ones you care about without even knowing how?

"We should consult DiZ," said Lexaeus. He paused, frowning. "Perhaps he has insight to share."

Sora threw in, "Now would probably be the best time to."

"Why's that?" asked Leon.

"Because he's standing in the doorway.

Every head turned towards the opposite end of the room, where stood a man Axel did not recognize, but could only be DiZ. He wore clothes of a similar variety to the first time they'd met, but the bandages were absent. There was no mistaking the amber eyes.

DiZ was considerably older than all of the members of the King's Men, save for Merlin; Axel would guess him to be in his mid-fifties. Wisdom marked his face, and his blonde, shoulder-length hair was beginning to gray. He bore the demeanor and appearance of a powerful leader, making Axel feel suddenly very intimidated. Sitting in a pool in a pair of floral swim trunks was not exactly the most dignified way to meet someone so important for a second time. Much less macho than torn up, blood stained man clothes.

"No masks this time?" said Sora, who was probably the only one brave enough to ask such an outright question.

"I've studied you all, and I haven't noticed any implications of spywork, here. I believe we are all safe," said DiZ calmly.

While Axel was relieved that none of his friends were double-agents, DiZ's statement still made him rather uncomfortable. Studied? What did that mean? This was only the second time Axel had even _seen _him. Did that mean he had like, cameras and stuff on them?

"Go on, then," said Leon, "To what do we owe the visit?"

"I bear grave news," said DiZ, regarding them with sad eyes. "I've just received intel from the Bastonian government. They say a group of spies managed to surpass their defenses and penetrate into the hollow bastion." He paused. "Xehanort's body has been successfully excavated. By the enemy."


	16. Choices

**This chapter is painfully short. And dialogue-y. But I figured I owed it to you, after making you wait so damn long for the last one. **

Not a sound could be heard throughout the colossal pool room as the news dawned on them that Xehanort was out. Out. Free.

Roxas froze completely. Up to this point, the enemy hadn't really seemed like a tangible force. He knew they _existed, _but he'd never seen one of their people, as far as he knew. The attack on the city was so large-scale, it seemed more like a tragedy than an act of evil.

But now, things were happening. They _had _him, they had_ the _Xehanort, that tried to take over their world.

"T-Terra?" Roxas asked questioningly. What if Terra had won the battle? What if the enemy had Terra? It was their only hope…"

"Whoever's soul resides in that body is weak," said DiZ. "He will be dazed, confused, and unaware of his surroundings for weeks. It will be like the awakening of someone who has been comatose for thousands of years. A birth by sleep. Whether Terra's soul has been saved or not is irrelevant; the enemy has reached him first. He will be committed to their cause long before we can reach him. I'm sorry, Roxas."

Roxas reached up to touch his face to realize there were warm tears there. They confused him; they were not tears of fear, but he found himself full of worry and sadness for Terra. He would be forced, possibly, to hunt his own side. That, or he was already dead.

At the thought of the word, dead, more tears flew freely from his eyes.

"I don't understand…" he tried to explain, pointing to his wetted cheeks.

"Ventus and Terra were very close," said Leon, resting a hand on Roxas' shoulder. "This is natural."

"Is there a way to save him?" said Roxas.

DiZ closed his eyes and sighed briefly. "Riku," he said, gaining the silverette's immediate attention. "Do you remember that which we discussed the day you joined our forces?"

"I do, sir," said Riku, nodding, "They have moved, sir, to the hollow base of the falls. But I can."

Roxas didn't understand what in the world Riku was talking about. He was having something of an out-of-body experience. Just when things seemed to be settling down, his life was thrown into shambles. He knew this day would come eventually, but eventually wasn't supposed to be _so soon. _He was supposed to have _years _to figure this out. He couldn't fight, not when he didn't even know the full extent of his powers."

"Might we adjourn in the conference room?" said DiZ, "My apologies, but it's becoming more in more difficult for me to breath in here, in such heavy clothing."

~o~

"Okay, what we know is, that the enemy has moved their location, from the temple ruins of the South, to underneath the rising falls of the North," said Riku, pacing around the elongated table.

The conference room was on the third floor, a place Roxas had never dared to venture before. Prior to today, all he knew to be up here was DiZ's study, and a shit-ton of storage. By some unwritten rule, usually nobody went up, and nobody came down.

DiZ sat at the end of the table, and the others were placed loosely according to age and experience within the resistance. Sora, for example, was seated much closer to him than Cloud because of rank.

"Now we know that the enemy has Xehanort, obviously, but whether he is still Xehanort now, or not, he _has _been made our enemy. I know how to infiltrate their base; I wrote the security system myself. I'm the only one that knows how to crack it. We need to get into the base; to gather intel, at the very least, on where they're keeping him. If Roxas comes with me, maybe we can stop him before he's even regained the full extent of Jenova's magic."

"You mean, kill him," said Roxas faintly. He couldn't kill a person. He couldn't. Bad or not, it was a _human _life.

Riku's expression softened greatly. "This goes against everything we believe in, everything _you _believe in. But it must be done. Discretion isn't a luxury we can afford. He will hold no discretion. He will _kill you. _He will kill all of us, and enslave the human race. The things we can do now? Our cells? They're barely _remnants _of Jenova's full powers. When he wakes up fully, he will become the equivalent of a human god, and when that happens, even you might not be able to stop him."

"I _know_," said Roxas, clenching his hands, one of which attached to Axels. Axel squeezed back softly, helping Roxas to relax just a little bit.

"I want to go with them," Axel spoke up, "Should they decide to do this."

"See it done," said DiZ. "I believe you to be a sound fight, Axel. You will be an asset."

"Thank you sir" said Axel.

Roxas wondered what Axel was thinking about, how he felt about all this. Roxas was the only thing that really tied him here. He didn't have to be involved in all of this. He, at the very least, could instead be in Midgar with Reno, where it was at substantially safer than it was where they were going. What which sparked his curiosity even further however, was DiZ. What he wouldn't give to pick _that _brain.

"It is impolite to probe about the lobes of one's mind," said DiZ, his voice lingering on the brink of amusement, "you would do well to ask permission next time."

Embarrassed, Roxas hung his head. He should have known that DiZ would be prepared; he'd spent the majority of his life specializing particularly in telepathics. He was probably the best shielder alive today.

"What can the rest of us do to help?" Demyx piped up.

DiZ stood up, crossed the room, and laid a hand on Demyx's shoulder.

"Believe, my friend," he said softly. "Leon, I will leave details pertaining to the specific course of action in your capable hands."

"Yes, sir," said Leon, bowing his head.

With that, the old leader left the room.

"Doesn't get in on the action much, does he?" Cloud asked skeptically.

"He's more brilliant than the rest of us put together," said Cid harshly, "So shut yer trap an' let the old man do 'is thinking, cause you can be fer damn sure he ain't gonna let nuthin go through till we run it by 'im."

"Cid is right," said Leon, "We'd be helpless, and most of us wouldn't even _be _here if it weren't for DiZ. What we _should _be discussing is a plan. The time has come for you to make a choice, Roxas. You've seen the records of our olden people; the great witch Maleficent made a prophecy, that Ventus would rise from the shadows as Xehanort rises from the ashes, and strike him down. You must be skeptical, but she'd never been wrong. And, really, so far, it has all been coming true. You possess the kind of cells the rest of us can only dream about, and your skills with _dual _Keyblades are unparalleled, already surpassing Sora's. We will most likely not succeed without you. Will you fight with us?"

_Yeah, and you'd likely succeed with me? _Roxas wanted to say. Everyone's eyes were on him, waiting, expecting. They were asking him to risk his life to _kill _a man. And possibly others. And for what?

_For humanity, _he answered for himself. The safety and tranquility of the _universe _was on his shoulders. How could he say no?

_I'm not ready,_ he thought miserably, _I'm not ready to take on the world. I-I can't._

_Do it for Naminé. _

Who said that? Where had it come from. He looked around at everyone, looking for some sign that a connection had been made, that someone had given him that message. But he couldn't feel any minds even relatively near his.

Do it for Naminé…

Anger boiled up inside of him for the people who took her life. It filled him, empowered him, like a really strong shot of espresso. He would fight for her, in her memory. He would fight for his parents, his brother. For Hayner, Pence, and Olette. He would fight for Axel.

With determination in his eyes, he looked toward the center of the table and nodded firmly.

"I'll do everything in my power to stop them, for good," he said, anger and strength still edging his voice. "I-I don't know if I'm strong enough to put somebody to death, but I will try. For all of you. And for you," he said, squeezing Axel's hand. "I'm not going to let them get you."

Axel dropped his hand entirely and let his arm slide around Roxas' waist. "I'm not going to let them get you, either."

He lifted his head and met Leon's expecting gaze. "Tell me what I need to do."


	17. Preparation

**I have an author's note of epic proportions for you guys, although it's mostly gonna be me gushing and fangirling and a little bit of apologizing so if you want, I would totally understand if you just skipped it completely and went to the chapter.**

**OH MY GOD. DREAM DROP DISTANCE. I got the Mark of Mastery Collectors Edition. IT'S SO GREAT. Like, I thought it might disappoint, since there's been so many spinoffs since KH2. BUT IT DIDN'T. It really tied everything together brilliantly and I AM SO IN LOVE. I didn't think it was possible for me to love a character more than Axel. But OHMYGAWD. I have fallen totally and completely and undeniably in love with Lea. Also, I'm ready to kill Xehanort and the soundtrack is awesome. **

**So... sorry for lack of updates. I know most of you have left me by now... No seriously, I have. But that's no excuse. Also, the oneshot for my lucky reviewer, a certain MyHartDoesNotBeat, will probably be up by AkuRoku day. That's what I'm aiming for anyway. Thank you, darling, for being so patient with me.**

**Last thing: OMFG AASDFGHJMKLGJBUOWJ I found out that one of my EXES IS READING THESE. PARTICULARLY ONESHOTS. HOLY SHIT, THAT'S LIKE IF MY PARENTS READ THESE. I do not know how to cope with this. I told him to check out my crossover, NOT MY SMUT. Ugh. **

**Okay. Go read now. Sorry.**

Dinner was not nearly as cheerful and Christmassy as everyone had hoped it would be. Sora weakly tried to start a conversation once or twice, but nobody was really in the mood for happiness and fun. Even the kitten (Roxas had gloomily named her Shadow) slept soundlessly on Axel's lap almost the entire time. Everything was delicious. They ate foods of many different traditions and origin, and Demyx had done a flawless job in decorating the cafeteria.

Yet nobody said a word. Roxas could feel eyes on him all evening, and he could almost feel the anxiety eradiating from Axel.

It was only seven o'clock by the time the "party" broke up and everyone went their separate ways. Some claimed to be going to bed, others (Sora and Demyx in particular) to scoop out the storage space for fun stuff, some to the rec room, while Leon and Riku said they were going to speak to DiZ.

Roxas, feeling drained from the entire day in general, opted to go back to his room and try to get some sleep, on the promise that they would delve further into his Jenova cells the next day. They would need to, after all, if they were going to go through with the plan.

Axel, being Axel, followed him, bringing Shadow along with him. When they arrived, Roxas found a little kitty structure waiting for them, as well as a litter box in the bathroom.

Shadow, upon seeing it, delightfully pounced onto her new kitty castle and settled immediately for a nap.

"At least one of us will sleep tonight," Axel chuckled, a bittersweet tone marking his voice.

Roxas knew that his Pull wasn't delighted with the plan, because it involved Roxas going right into the inner clutches of the enemy. But in complete honesty, Roxas wasn't too thrilled about Axel coming with him. Though he'd still never admit it, he didn't know what he could possibly do with himself if anything were to happen to Axel.

By some unspoken agreement, it was decided that they would in fact go to bed, as opposed to any earlier activities they'd been planning to pick up with. Just because really Roxas was far too depressed to want to even initiate any kind of lovemaking.

Roxas had long since learned that sleeping with Axel (by the literal sense of the word) could get really hot (again, literally) because of the redhead's scorching body heat. So he peeled off his the t-shirt he'd changed into before the meeting, put on some night pants, and climbed right into bed next to Axel. Instinctually they leaned into one another, and before long Roxas was trying as hard as he could to fall asleep in Axel's warm embrace.

An hour later, Cloud snuck in to come to bed, and both Axel and Roxas were awake to bid him goodnight.

It almost felt like a sleep over, in Roxas' opinion. He knew that the other two were awake, and he knew that _they _knew that he was awake. He almost wanted to talk about the day's earlier events, but he could find neither the words nor a place to start. That, and the tense silence in which everyone was waiting for _somebody _to talk threw him off guard.

So he settled for just thinking instead.

With little to no contribution from the blonde himself, Leon and Riku formulated a plan that would get their team (Axel, Riku, and Roxas) into the enemy's base without detection. In order to make the plan a reality, Roxas would have to learn to create telepathic webs over long-distances in which all three of them could communicate with one another. Since the sediments in the falls created a highly reactive magnetic field, any bugging devices that they could try to use would be rendered useless.

After the connection was made, Riku would work on the infiltration itself. He had been the fourth most trusted member of the Nobodies; and as such he was given the task of writing the program for their entire security system. Whether they had changed the codes or not, Riku knew his way around every flaw in the system, and would be able to shut it down completely if that's what it came to. Once a route into the physics-defying structure was made, he would send Axel and Roxas mental instructions. Once inside, it was like a blind hunt. The operation would be done at night, obviously, while the enemy is at their weakest. It would be "get in, find Xehanort, kill him, and get out before someone notices."

Easier said than done, right?

They'd be equipped, of course, with not only their own weapons but back up firearms as well. But, as Riku had sadly informed them, once discovered, there wasn't a likely chance of survival for any of them. There would be no rescue missions. If a man was lost, he was to be left behind. Roxas had nodded his head at the time, but he knew inside (as did Riku, he was positive) that if Axel got caught, Roxas would be there, kneeling next to him with his hands above his head. It was either both of them or neither.

He tried to imagine what would happen then, if they discovered who he was. He was to dye his hair brown and pose as Sora for the mission, just as a precaution. Since the Nobodies knew who Sora was and that he was indeed a Key-bearer, it was ideal. Roxas tried not to imagine what they would do to him if they'd already discovered the real Sora's connection to Riku. They'd probably turn him into a dusk… then it would all be over anyway.

He was terrified. There wasn't any denying it. He didn't want to lose his life, and he certainly didn't want to lose Axel.

The mission had no set date, but he felt like he was on a countdown. There were only X amount of days left, weeks left, hours left with Axel. What if they couldn't ever see each other after that, until the next life? By then, who knows what will have happened to the worlds, what with Xehanort on the rise.

Without really thinking about it, he tightened his arms around Axel and did the equivalent of melting into him. Axel was awake, he knew, because he shifted into a more comfortable position, and then held Roxas closer as well. They were scared for each other. They were afraid to let go.

~o~

Roxas opened his eyes to see a girl with violet eyes and choppy, medium-blue hair staring down at him. They startled him (he had just been sleeping) and he jolted awake with a loud cry of surprise.

"Gimme a break, Aqua," he complained playfully. Aqua? This was Aqua? Of course it was. It had to be. She looked just like the woman in the murals.

Roxas was strangely aware of himself. He didn't know where exactly he was, but _he_ knew it was home. He didn't know exactly who she was, but _he _knew it was Aqua. He didn't wasn't the one to yell at her. It was _him. _Ventus.

Roxas was Ventus.

His body moved without his consent, spoke without him telling to. It was like he was in a dream, except lucid, and yet still with no control.

Aqua was giggling at him. It was dark outside, but not black. They were not in the Castle That Never Was. They were in Hollow Bastion. Yes, Roxas knew it inside. Or rather, Ventus must have. They sat in what appeared to be a little courtyard. It was green. That surprised Roxas. Hollow Bastion was anything but green, unless you went south enough to reach the forest, in no-man's land.

"Ven, you hopeless sleepyhead," she said, affection lacing her voice, "You know you should have at least brought a blanket."

He felt mild annoyance at her tone. She was always treating him like a child.

"I dreamt this weird place up," Ven told her, "It seemed so familiar…"

She ruffled his hair gently, like a mother, soothing her child after a nightmare, "'Cept you've always lived here, with us."

Her voice was steady, almost robotic. From Roxas' perspective, it was clear that she cared a lot about Ventus, and felt almost an obligation to take care of him. From Ventus' perspective, they were equals. Friends, best friends at that. At least, he hoped. There was part of him that also suspected that she held herself a little bit above him.

"Yeah, I know," said Ventus, shrugging it off. It was becoming easier for Roxas to distinguish between Ventus' thoughts and his own. This _had _to be a bizarre dream. It was like having two minds at the same time. Unnerving but kind of sweet. Even though Ventus' thoughts and actions were clearly his own, and unaffected by Roxas, Roxas could still feel them.

He was thankful when Ven started walking towards the edge of the courtyard, so he could take a better look around. It was built on a cliff, and in the distance Roxas could see forests, hills, and other mountains. And a flat valley. Beyond the valley, a great drop off, into what seemed like a giant, jagged crater. Could it be the great maw of Roxas' Hollow Bastion?

"Hey Aqua?" Ventus asked, "D'you ever wonder what stars are? Where light comes from?"

Okay, so it was clear that they knew nothing about interworld travel. If this was Hollow Bastion, then it would have to be thousands of years earlier. And if that were the case…

…He could very well be looking into Ventus' memories.

"Hmm…" she considered a moment, "Well, they say—"

"—that every star up there is another world," said a male voice.

Ventus' heart leapt with delight as he turned around to face the man who owned the voice. He was tall, about as tall as Riku, except more broad-shouldered, and his hair was dark brown. He dressed similar to them; primitive, hand-sewn clothing that looked like it was enforced with armor. So the three already knew one another. And judging by the way they were dressed, they'd already become a part of Xehanort's army.

"Terra," the blunette introduced him for Roxas.

"Yep," he continued, "It's hard to believe that there are so many worlds out there other than our own."

He was right on the dot there. Perhaps the people were not quite as far behind as Roxas originally assumed. They were wearing woven clothing, shoes, and Terra was clean shaven. Roxas placed them right around the age of the first industrial revolution; about 2000 years ago. According to textbook, Hollow Bastion had taken longer to evolve than any other planet known to them, even ones that are still behind them technologically. But Roxas still found it hard to believe that they were this advanced back then. Twilight Town was on the same page as Hollow Bastion, and they'd only had the combustion engine since the time of the great railroad, when humankind finally figured out transport to other words.

"The light is their hearts," Terra continued, "And it's shining down on us like a million lanterns."

Both Roxas and Ventus found that kind of lame. It was starting to sound more like a bedtime story.

"I don't get it," said Ven blankly.

"They're just like you, Ven," Terra replied. Ven knew that tone, it was that tone he used when he had a secret, a secret that no matter how much he begged, wouldn't be shared.

He tried it anyway, "What do you mean?"

"You'll find out someday, I'm sure."

Again, with the parenting. Roxas couldn't think that Terra was _that _much older than Ventus. Maybe by three years or so.

"I wanna know now!" Ven huffed.

"You're too young to know now," Terra reasoned.

"Stop treating me like a kid!" the blonde growled. Really, Roxas agreed, what gives? This was supposedly the great hero that would return and whoop Xehanort's rear. He couldn't have been a pushover.

Aqua was laughing again. "You two would make the weirdest brothers."

They stopped arguing, each shouting their denials. And suddenly Roxas understood. The way Ven aspired to be like Terra, the authoritve way that Terra could boss Ven around sometimes (again, things he just _knew_), Terra holding Ventus at arm's length.

Ventus had a crush on Terra.

And Terra knew it.

_Wait a sec_, Roxas thought. _Time out. I thought I was supposed to be… with Axel? Where is he? Terra can't be Axel, cause Terra gets bonded to Aqua, doesn't he?_

Before he could contemplate it further, he was being yanked away from the scene as unnatural light streamed through his eyelids. Morning was greeting him.

_~o~_

_Jesus Christ, Axel! You gave me a fucking heart attack! Where are you!? _Roxas thought frantically as he pushed through the darkened, barren corridors aimlessly in search of his lover.

_Calm down, love, _said (thought) Axel, _I'm in the cafeteria. We're getting better at this!_

Roxas growled and angrily exited the pitch black gymnasium, heading over (in what he assumed to be the right direction) to the cafeteria where Axel claimed to be, and, in accordance to the shaking boom Roxas just heard, had just practiced his new favorite attack, in which he could create and explosions just by compressing and heating the air around him. It was pretty sweet, but always freaking terrifying. The lights in the hallways had been turned off too, so, after a minute of trying to feel around, Roxas gave up and held out a small orb of light so as to not run into any walls.

_You need to be more alert, Roxas, _Riku's mental voice said to him, _you look like a lighthouse. _

Startled, Roxas flung himself around in search of Riku, his heart pounding loudly in the dense silence. Even after brightening the ball of light in his hands, the corridor appeared as empty as ever. There was still no sign of the silverette that he could see.

Suddenly, a large and gloved hand clamped over his mouth.

_Think more like the enemy, _Riku said harshly into his ear. Or would have, if they were speaking out loud. Roxas took hold of the exposed wrist next to his other ear and managed to flip Riku over his shoulder. Now in complete darkness, he summoned both of his Keyblades and held them in an X over Riku's throat, pinning him down.

"Don't underestimate me," Roxas hissed out loud, the connection having been broken when he lost his light.

Axel was right, they _were _getting better. Though Roxas predominantly worked with Axel and Riku, he'd practiced making mental connections over distances to everyone in the castle, so that in turn, they could learn to conceal and protect their thoughts from him and others like him that weren't so kind about it. He and Riku had also formed a brother-like connection; the _real kind_, where you fight nonsensically over stupid things almost 24/7. They spent hours a day practicing what Riku called "leeching" on one another.

Roxas hated leeching. Hence their constant bickering. When Riku did it to him, it was possibly one of the most unpleasant sensations he'd ever felt on his body. First it would make his stomach churn, then his head would get heavy; his knees would give out, and he could just feel the energy being drained from his body. Riku would try and do it as quickly and gently as possible, but in the end, that was still _Roxas' _life energy that Riku tossed at an unsuspecting target.

The blonde's powers were much tamer than Riku's. All he had to do was tap into another's lifestream, and whatever their element was became his element. With Axel it was fire, Demyx water, etc. With Riku it was shadow throwing, enabling him to return the favor to the silverette.

"Guys, what happened?" Axel called. He entered the room, carrying a little flame in his hands, using it as a makeshift flashlight. Not as bright as Roxas, but still effective. "I thought we were supposed to meet in the cafeteria?"

"We were, but Riku jumped me," Roxas growled. Riku, meanwhile, was squirming around and trying to kick his legs up high enough to free himself from Roxas' little cage. "Oh no you _don't_," Roxas countered, pinning Riku's legs down with his knees.

"Jeez, I leave you two alone for _two _seconds and look what happens," Axel said jokingly.

In one fluid motion, Roxas jammed his Keyblades into the cracks in the floor, trapping Riku. Then his raised his hands up, and called Axel's fire to him. It really wasn't hard. As soon as a connection was made, he could call the flames to him just as easily as he could call his light.

The flames changed in color a little as they changed from Axel's will to Roxas'. Instead of their normal orangey yellow, they turned bright white gold as Roxas formed a shining golden cage around his love. Roxas wasn't _really _angry with anyone anymore, but it was common practice to start a fight at least once a day. It was good training, good exercise, and great for alleviating stress.

"Silly Roxas, don't you know I'm immune to my own fire," said Axel, stepping through his cage like it was little more than a projection.

Roxas was blindingly lethal in midair. He moved like the night; he was small, fast, and deadly. With only his hands to work with (as his Keyblades still had Riku stuck on the floor) he had the redhead pinned to the ground in ten seconds flat, straddling his skinny waist and holding his hands above his head. Though it proved useless, they were still surrounded by a ring of glowing, hot flames. Though Axel was no match for him, he _had _put up quite a fight. They were both catching their breaths.

"Okay, okay, I surrender," Axel panted, "Christ, Rox, that is so hot."

"What happened to all of you being on the same team," asked Demyx, poking his head into the main hallway to see what was causing all the commotion.

"Riku cheated," said Roxas simply, removing the flames but not yet removing himself from Axel.

Demyx turned on the light and wolf whistled at the sight of both older men on the ground with their asses beat.

"I just want you to be _prepared,_" said Riku, pulling the Keyblades out of the ground to free himself. "They're not all as nice and loveable as me. They won't hesitate to kill you. Can't you guys see that I just want you to be _safe?" _ He added in an after tone, "You're getting much stronger, I admit it. I think you can do this."

"Damn, if Riku is kind and loveable I don't think these Nobodies should even classify as _human,_" Roxas joked. He kissed Axel's nose. "_You, _on the other hand, need more practice."

"I let you win," said Axel nonchalantly, trying to lean up for a real kiss.

"Nope," said Roxas, jumping to his feet. "Beat me first."

Axel frowned. He knew fully well that Roxas was dead serious, and that he wasn't skilled enough to win against the blonde just yet. "What if I just pronounced you king of the world instead?" he tried, his eyes pleading.

"Not good enough," said Roxas. "Come on, Axe, I'm serious. You _have _to get better. _I'm _not even the best that's out there, and if you lose to them, they're not gonna sit around your sorry ass and kiss the bruises they left. They'll kill you. And I _can't _have any dead Axels. Understand?"

It was as close as he could come to telling Axel he loved him.

Roxas was never the most skilled with his feelings, and he was certainly never the most skilled at expressing them. He could acknowledge them internally, but externally, if they ever showed at all, they were sporadic and generally pretty extreme. He knew Axel knew, though. They'd shared minds enough times to know how each felt about the other. It was almost like having a twin, Roxas assumed, minus the making out every few hours. They were familiar enough with one another they could finish sentences, and more or less just had a vast knowledge of who they were. Roxas knew that Axel couldn't sleep with his socks on, had a secret love for folk music, didn't like pickles and sometimes sang in the shower when he didn't think anyone was looking.

Axel whined at him and picked up his chakrams, which had clattered to the floor not long after he'd entered the wide spanning hallway. He had a very open fighting stance, and he moved quickly and unpredictably, like a fire. No matter what, he was always moving. Even at a rest position, he swung his deadly wheels back and forth, and threw his hips along with the beat.

Roxas was still faster, though. While the shape and maneuverability of the chakrams gave Axel something of an advantage, Roxas was able to dodge them easily and come up from behind before Axel could so much as blink.

The blonde worked on making himself look as seductive as possibly as they fought. He made sure to show off his flexibility whenever the opportunity presented itself, and he kept his shirt partially unbuttoned. It was his and Axel's favorite game. It was perfect for honing any number of skills; offensive, defensive, psychic, whatever. Though Roxas was probably the most motivated anyway, the promise of making out could always give it a little something extra. Like a little gold star at the end of the day.

The fight was gradually becoming less like a fight and more like a dance. Many of the same steps and advances repeated themselves, but Roxas was always one step ahead of Axel. The redhead could sometimes get close enough to touch, and would even occasionally try to go in for a kiss. It was during those times that Roxas liked to perform his most brutal submissions, and more often than not, Axel would end up on the floor, unarmed, seconds later.

Word had spread that Axel and Roxas were sparring again, and many residents began to gather around and watch. Even though many _many _of them were much better fighters than the duo, they were, by far, the most entertaining to watch. If the rounds lasted long enough, sometimes friends would place friendly bets, or even pass around an assortment of snacks. More than once Demyx suggested that they should charge admission, and Roxas wouldn't go as far as to say some wouldn't pay.

There was only one field in which Axel surpassed Roxas in: stamina. Though he never showed it, Roxas would often begin to tire after the fifth or sixth round. During one dazed slip up from Roxas, Axel managed to catch the blades in his chakrams like a stick in the spokes of a bicycle, and yank them from his grip. As the Keyblades fell to the floor, Axel backed Roxas up against the wall by aiming one of the eight spikes on the circular device at the blonde's jugular.

Applause burst out from Kairi, Demyx, and Sora as Roxas put his hands down in surrender.

"All right, fine. You got me," said Roxas, smirking. "Good job."

Without any regard of the company they had, Axel dropped his weapons on the ground next to Roxas', advanced in on the blonde and began kissing him feverishly. It was hot, deep, and totally unrestrained. Roxas heard his friends making all manner of noises, including wolf-whistles, catcalls, and false retching, all of which they ignored. They began exiting the scene in small groups, clearly receiving the message that the couple wasn't going to be sparring again soon.

Roxas gripped his Pull tightly and let himself get lost in their tiny, personal moment of bliss.

~o~

"Axel? Will you pray with me?"

Axel looked up from behind his hands to see his little blonde staring at him out of tired, bloodshot eyes. They were going to do it. They were leaving for the mission very soon. Tomorrow, to be specific.

"Uhh…" was his reply. He still wasn't very good at the whole praying thing. When Roxas did it, it was just fine because he could do whatever he wanted with his god as long as it gave him peace of mind and it gave Axel his time to think quietly, or even to just sit and stroke the back of Roxas' hand.

He knew Roxas would win him over sooner or later anyway, so he allowed himself to be towed over to the windowless sanctuary. He supposed if any situation was worth praying over, theirs was.

Thankfully, Roxas wasn't the type to pray out loud in funky tongues, like some of the other loons Axel had seen in his time, so Axel was able to think (pray?) a little.

_Hey again, _he began, _funny how we keep meeting every time I'm in trouble, eh? All because of that little guy… Anyway—I don't know where to start, really. Should I repent for the deceptive and possibly murderous (not to mention sexual) sins I'm about to commit, ahead of time? Only to ask for your help in accomplishing them? Well, not the sex bit, obviously, but the other two. But that's not very fair, huh? How about this? Please just don't take Roxas away from me. I know the whole reincarnation Pull thingy doesn't tie in much with what's in your book—okay, ANYWAY (_damn him always getting off topic) _Regardless of whether The Pull is even _real _or not, you know what he means to me. And you know DAMN well that the feelings I have for him aren't blasphemous or sinful or whatever the fuck they're calling it these days. If not then fuck you._

…

_Oops. Sorry. I didn't mean it. Please, just, if nothing else, don't take Roxas away from me. That's all I'm asking man, I don't think it should really be too strenuous a task for a big guy like you._

Axel let it drop. He felt so silly. It just felt like he was thinking to himself. So many different believe systems— from goddesses to indigenous voodoo to the bible—were intertwined together here, it was difficult to know what to believe, difficult to believe that there even was a god.

When he was a teenager, Axel had decided that God was just an entity created by man to bring emotional fulfillment and peace of mind to those who feared what they could not understand, to fill the void (such an original, groundbreaking theory). But even if He did exist, Axel doubted that they would be on speaking terms anyway.

A silent, warm pressure on his hand signified that Roxas was done. They looked up at each other at the same time.

"Ready?" said Axel. What he'd meant to say for the moment was, 'are you ready to leave this room?' But both of them knew that it ran much deeper than that.

"I guess," Roxas replied unenthusiastically. They would be heading to the crafts room (one of the many which Axel had never bothered looking in) to dye Roxas' hair brown. His pretty blonde hair… what if it never grew back the same color?

Roxas didn't seem too thrilled about it either. Over the last few days especially, Axel noticed him running his fingers through it a lot more often and looking miserable at it in the mirror. Axel knew he'd never admit to it should anyone call him up on it, so the redhead just kept quiet.

"We can strip it when we get back," said Axel reassuringly. They were going to use permanent, top quality dye just in case the mission turned for the worst and the team was captured and held prisoners. It would be impossible to tell how long they could be kept for. Although Axel, for one, thought it fruitless, seeing as sooner or later, the enemy was going to notice.

The blonde shook his head. "It's really not a big deal," he mumbled, standing up as he spoke.

Their walk to the crafts room was silent. When they arrived, Leon and Zexion were waiting for Roxas with a smock and what looked like a mortar dish of solution.

"Are you sure it's the right color?" Roxas asked, eyeing the reddish concoction suspiciously.

"Absolutely," said Leon, "Hand mixed this morning by Marluxia himself."

Axel snapped his head up from whatever passive corner of the room he was checking out to give Leon his undivided attention. "Marly? Like, bubble-gum pink haired 'I'm the biggest, most divalicious faggot alive Marly? He's okay!?"

"Is there any other?" Leon mumbled, "Yeah, he's just fine. His penthouse is in one of the few buildings that took no damage at all. From what I heard he's doing pretty well. Said he was trading some clothes and renting rooms out for food and such.

Axel wasn't really that well acquainted with Marluxia, but hearing that he was alive and well sparked hope in the redhead. Despite all the nasty shit going on, life was still moving, at least for some people. He was glad someone as fair and delicate as Marluxia didn't need to get so tangled into this violent mess.

By the end of the evening, Roxas' hair was cut, dyed, and styled to look exactly like Sora's. Admittedly, when Leon and Zexion showed each of them how to appropriately style it, even without gel, it wasn't really too difficult for either of them to pick up. His hair already fell in a very similar way to Sora. If Axel didn't know every contour of Roxas' face perfectly, even he agreed that it would be pretty hard to distinguish between the two.

Even Sora, when he came in, stopped dead for a second, and then said, "Hey Zex? Is there something you guys should be telling me? Like why you decided to conjure up a nice little clone of me?"

"It's _me, _stupid," said Roxas, his voice giving it away, "Seriously, do I really look that much like him?" he asked Riku, who had followed Sora into the room.

"I can tell who's who," said Riku, circling them and sizing them up, "But it's very close."

In Axel's opinion, being Sora didn't really become him. They stuck him in a tanning booth for like, twenty minutes (one of the many almost-useless captives of the labyrinth that was the castle's storage chamber), so even the skin color was closer. The look just didn't suit his face.

"What do you think?" said Roxas, spinning around in front of Axel.

"Sorry, Sora isn't my type," Axel mocked. At Roxas' reproachful glare, he quickly added, "I'm just kidding, love. I'm pretty sure I could write a book on not giving a fuck. You could change into Xaldin if you wanted to, I really don't think it would make a difference as to how I see you: beautiful."

"You sap," said Roxas, cracking a smile.

Axel shrugged, "You asked," he said nonchalantly. Showering Roxas with compliments was among Axel's favorite hobbies, holding a candle only to sparring with Roxas, sharing a bed with Roxas, and kissing Roxas. If Axel weren't taller, bolder, overprotective, and all around more masculine (ha) he'd probably be the female of the relationship. Roxas was _not _one for flattery, but he accepted it from Axel because, well, he was Axel. Axel said nice thing, Roxas called him a sap, and they moved on.

"Well, it looks like you're done," said Zexion, "The eye color is close enough, and contacts really aren't suitable for long-term disguise anyway. How do you feel?"

"I feel like me," said Roxas dryly. He ran a hand through his hair. The roots ached from being parted the wrong way and tingled from the residual dye. "My hair hurts, but I'll get over it." He surveyed his arms and legs, "I also feel like a cheese puff."

"Hey!" Sora yelled defensively, "Do I look like a cheese puff to you, Riku?"

Riku laughed and shook his head. "No Sora, you do not look like a cheese puff. You would look silly if you were as white as Roxas usually is."

"Or maybe I would look like Roxas," the brunette pointed out, "We could do the ol' switcheroony."

"_NO!"_ Riku and Axel shouted in unison. "Do you know how _confusing _that could get?" said Riku, "Knowing me, I'd mistake you from a distance and accidentally molest Roxas from behind."

"And then I'd have to kill you," Axel added.

Roxas and Sora smirked to one another and pounded fists. In Axel's opinion, they looked and behaved more like twins than clones, and it was pretty adorable to watch.

Dinner that night was rather bittersweet. Xaldin had made lasagna, and it was delicious, as everything of his was. Yet everybody's smiles were forced, and fake. Axel could tell that they were all doing the best they could to act normally, but there was no covering up the hopeless feeling that loomed over them like a circle of scavengers. Everybody knew that there was a good chance that somebody would not come home.

Roxas, Axel, and Riku especially avoided eye contact with each other. It was difficult to feel nervous about the upcoming mission when a conversation between oneself, Xion, and Demyx ensued, but Axel found that just as soon as he caught eyes with Riku, or even Roxas, he remembered that this may be the last meal they'd ever share together.

Nobody said this out loud, of course. Quite the contrary, everyone, Kairi in particular, seemed to be making extra efforts to discuss all the things that would happen _after _the mission was successfully completed. She was overly optimistic that they would find Xehanort, get him, and be home in time for dinner, or breakfast, as the schedule may have it.

"Then, after that, it'll all be _smoooooth _sailing," she'd say, _"_Gosh, this is so exciting, isn't it!? When this is done, I don't even know what I'm going to _do _with my life. I guess I'll just keep working on restoring Hollow Bastion. Or maybe Sora, Riku and I could go on vacation to Destiny Islands…"

And it kept going like that. Axel smiled and nodded frequently, for Kairi's sake, but it was so surreal to imagine that if they _did _manage to do the job, that it would be _all_ over. There would be no need for the King's Men anymore, with their enemy rendered powerless. There would be no need for the Castle That Never Was, or for his chakrams, or for any of their Jenova cells. And if it were hard for Axel to wrap his mind around, he couldn't even imaging what it was like for Sora, or DiZ, who's spent their entire _lives _working up to this night.

The final outcome of the very same Bastonian war they'd read about in their 5th grade textbooks; the same stalemate that had carried on for thousands of years, hung in the balance of one tiny infiltration.

The nobodies had Xehanort; they had Roxas. It was everything or nothing, like the story (possibly the only one save for creation and redemption that Axel knew from the bible) of David and Goliath. Axel only hoped that Roxas would be the David in this story.

Dinner had broken up rather awkwardly, and a line began to form around Axel, Roxas, and Riku. Everyone wanted to wish them luck, tell them how great they were going to do. Everyone wanted to give them hugs, shake their hands.

Everyone wanted to tell them goodbye.

Pool wasn't very competitive that night. Nobody argued over what genre of movie they would put on. Nobody make bets concerning the outcome of poker. The only thing there wasn't a shortage of was alcohol. Everyone, even Xion, sat solemnly with a drink in hand, waiting for the appropriate time to call it a night and go back to their rooms, where no one would sleep.

When that time came, Axel and Roxas were the first to leave. As they walked back, hand in hand, Axel couldn't help but think, _This is our last night. _

He'd spent the day trying to convince himself that was okay, that by this time tomorrow they'd be victoriously announcing that the universe was safe again. But that all seemed so silly. He couldn't see it happening. What if he got hurt? Or worse, what if Roxas—? He stopped himself. He wouldn't let himself think those thoughts.

"You don't think we're going to make it, do you?"

Axel froze, his hand on their doorknob? How could Roxas know? Oh yeah, telepathy…

That's okay, Axel would just lie anyway. He swung the door open and shrugged. "Riku said we have a good chance. He knows his way around and stuff."

Roxas followed him inside, "Hmm. Yeah. Except I'm pretty sure I didn't _ask _what Riku said."

Axel didn't answer. Some time ago, Roxas gave him strict orders to not be negative about this, and for the most part, Axel followed them. But now that they were here, and this was really happening, it was hard to find hope. He supposed that he was like every other stupid human that existed, scared of the unknown, and scared of death.

They undressed and climbed into bed silently. Roxas made no move to turn the table lamp off just yet, and that meant that they still had things to talk about.

"You know, Rox, I love—"

Before Axel could say 'you,' one of Roxas' little hands snaked out of nowhere to clamp hard over Axel's mouth.

"Don't say it," he said quietly.

Feeling slightly deflated, Axel stuck his tongue out, efficiently removing Roxas' hand from his face.

"Why not?" he asked in a tiny voice. Did Roxas feel awkward because he needed more time? Or did he not feel the same way?

The blonde seemed to sense what Axel was feeling, or perhaps he just heard what the redhead was thinking, because he wiggled around until he was literally sprawled across Axel's chest. He propped his chin up on his forearms and looked Axel directly in the eyes, with red rings encircled around his own.

"Because that's like saying goodbye," he said, his voice breaking on goodbye. He cleared his throat, "And I _will not _say goodbye to you. Whether we make _any _progress whatsoever, no matter _what _happens, I'm not gonna leave that place without you, understand?"

Axel could feel the not-blonde's chest heaving, one of the few signs that signified that Roxas did in fact have emotional capacity surpassing that of a toad. It made him feel awful.

"Okay, love," he murmured into Roxas' hair, "No goodbyes."

Axel shut the light off and they lay together in darkness. Axel knew it would be another sleepless night for him. He pretended to be asleep when Cloud came in, just to skip the awkwardness of saying goodnight and then lying there awake not saying anything. He wished he could fall asleep. He didn't toss and turn much, in fear of disturbing Roxas.

Long after he could hear light snores coming from Cloud's bunk, and long after he was sure Roxas had drifted to sleep, he felt the not-blonde stir.

He froze. He wasn't sure if Roxas knew he was awake or not. When he felt a familiar pair of lips touch his, curiosity was the only thing that kept him from responding.

"I know," his Pull whispered, "I love you too."

~o~

Ventus liked to walk with his arms swinging, a lot. He and Terra were walking, side by side, through the woods. Aqua was nowhere to be found.

The narrow pathway was rocky, and surrounded by mossy rocks and viney trees.

"I'm not that young, you know," said Ventus. It was daytime now, and Ven was still thinking about the last joke Terra had made about his young age. Apparently, it was a habit of his. "I mean, Master Xehanort chose _me _too. Just because you have a couple years' seniority doesn't mean you and Aqua get to treat me like your kid brother or something. I thought we were friends."

"Are you _still _mad about that?" Terra asked. He smirked as they arrived in a small clearing, "If you're that much of a man, fight me."

Ventus stopped. He could still never beat Terra when they sparred. He could beat Aqua occasionally. He was good, one of the three best in the world, but not as good as Terra. But that didn't necessarily mean he wasn't up for the challenge. If he got lucky, maybe he'd get to see Terra with his shirt off.

_Ugh, _thought Roxas, with thoughts of Axel still fresh in his mind. He wondered how long these flashbacks would keep up for.

"Try and keep up with me," Ventus challenged, summoning his Keyblade. For a moment Roxas understood why Terra was so confident. Ventus was _holding _his Keyblade wrong. Its length stretched out _behind _him instead of in front of him.

As soon as they started moving, Roxas took it back completely, and let himself be mesmerized. He'd never imagined using the Keyblade in this way. Ventus' technique was strictly offensive, yet each blow was dealt entirely backhand, making it defensive by default. Even with a free ride in a body doing all the work for him, Roxas still couldn't completely wrap his head around it. Even with one Keyblade, Ventus was good. _Extremely _good. Far better than Roxas, anyway.

Roxas shut his (figurative) eyes to everything else and worked on focusing solely on Ventus' actions. He tried to imagine himself exercising each action; telling Ventus' body to fight, and hoping that the real Ventus was doing the same thing. Sadly, it did not happen often, and Roxas feared that if he tried this in reality, he'd end up dislocating all the joints in his arms.

Ventus, however, was having the time of his life. Despite never being able to defeat Terra, he was still a good match. What Ventus lacked in strength he made up for with speed and agility, whereas Terra relied almost completely on brawn.

They were at it for almost ten minutes when Terra finally caught the teeth of Ventus' Keyblade with his own and gave it a firm yank. Roxas felt the pain shoot up Ventus' arms as he was forced to let go of his weapon and watch it fall ungracefully to the forest floor.

"Ven Ven!"

Both men turned around to see two young females approaching them, following the same trail as the other two previously had. One of them was tan and very stunning, with ebony black hair and a very—to put it bluntly—sexy demeanor. She was dressed scantily and she had a rather piercing confidence about her. She had not been the one to call out to Ventus.

Roxas' heart soared at the sight of an adorably female Axel running toward them, yet Ventus' did not. She was definitely Axel, Roxas was sure of it. She had bright red hair, tied into curly pigtails, and precisely the same eyes, in shape and color. There was no mistaking it. Roxas scowled as he noticed she was about the same height as Ventus, contrary to her soul's current vessel.

"Hullo, Vanille," Ventus replied dully, reluctantly taking the girl into a short little hug. Roxas noticed Terra smirking at the sight, and Ven noticed too. "How are you?"

"Fabulous," she replied, "Me and Fang were just talking, and she reckons I oughta wear pink to the bonding ceremony. Pink! I think she's crazy. I mean, it would totally clash with my hair!"

"It's not like you've ever let that stop you," the raven-haired girl who must be Fang said, "You're wearing pink right now. And I'm right here, you know."

Vanille waved a hand dismissively, "Anyway, I was thinking more of a white. I know that like, no one wears white at weddings but I think it's just such a nice color. What do you think?"

"I don't know, Vanni," said Ventus wearily. "I always did like white on you, but you can do whatever you like. It's a girl thing."

"Well, okay, Mr. Manly Man," said Vanille with a giggle. "I'll leave you alone about it. But you _do _need to figure out what you're gonna wear too. It _is _in just two weeks, you know."

"Yeah, I know," Ventus replied, trying not to sound too deflated. "I know that your sister and Terra are going to be in blue. If you want we could try to match them. It really makes no difference to me."

Being the daughter of the chief of the village meant being married to the strongest warrior. That was just the way the cookie crumbled. Aqua, already being the strongest warrior in the village, got immediate first choice between Ventus and Terra. And she chose Terra. Ventus wasn't offended by her decision; after all, he wanted Terra too. But he didn't know Vanille like he knew Aqua. She made him almost uncomfortable, having jumped so readily into a relationship. He tried not to hold it against her, but it'd been hard after liking Terra so long.

Roxas frowned inside. What wasn't to like? Sure, she was pretty girly, and slightly ignorant, but really, she was cute. And she was completely into Ventus. That was more than could be said about either of his other friends, the ones that apparently he was much more ready to commit the rest of eternity to. Or maybe just this life, perhaps they didn't know just how _binding _marriage of this time was. Maybe Roxas was just unintentionally biased.

Vanille frowned. "I know you're not as into this as I'd like you to be, so I don't mind arranging everything on my own. But I _would _like to see you smile for once. It's not gonna be as bad as you say, I promise. We just go up, let my mom sprinkle some weird powder on us, kiss one time, and eat some paopu fruit. It'll be over before you know it. It's not like we have to _live _together yet, what with you going to war and all anyway."

"Yeah…" Ventus said noncommittally. It didn't _matter _that they weren't going to be living together. He'd never be able to sleep with _anyone _else anyway. Not if he wanted to live to see the dawn. Not that he was compelled to sleep around for the rest of his life, but getting married completely crushed any hopes he had for Terra.

Vanille gently brushed some of Ventus' hair away from his eyes. "I guess I'll go now. Try and cheer up, okay?"

He tried to smile for her sake. "Okay."

"Come on, Fang," she said, walking away from the clearing. Fang, who had struck up a light conversation with Terra, bade him goodbye as she made to follow her friend. As soon as they were out of earshot, Terra turned to him, a relentless smirk plastered on his face.

"Awe, aren't you two cute," he cooed, "You excited for the big day?"

"Psh, no," said Ventus coolly. "Are you?"

Terra shrugged. "More or less. I mean, Aqua and I are friends. But I like the idea of settling down, so to speak. Marriage marks manhood."

"And you'd rather settle for her than someone you love?" Ventus demanded. _Whoa, easy tiger_, Roxas thought. Then again, Ventus technically was him. They were the same feisty, impulsive person inside, so he'd probably be doing the same thing.

The brunette looked surprised at Ventus' hostility. "Well, it's not like I have a choice in the matter!" he said defensively, "Maybe you forgot, but this marriage was arranged for me, too! You're not the only one who'd prefer it under different circumstances!"

They glared at one another a moment, then Terra seemed to remember himself. "I'm sorry, Ven. I shouldn't have yelled at you. You're right. You're not a child, and you've just as much right to be upset as anyone else. I know you're not thrilled about this. Neither am I. I wish I had more time…"

The silence that followed was _very _awkward. Neither would look at the other. If Roxas weren't head over heels for Axel, and subsequently, Vanille, he would have been thinking, _oh for goodness' sake, just make out already. _But that wasn't the case. So he waited.

And waited. Until _finally—_

"Ven! Terra!"

Both men swung their heads around to see Aqua running for them, full speed. Panic crept in through Ven's veins, sparking curiosity in Roxas. When she reached them, she sank down with her hands on her knees, taking a minute to catch her breath. "Master Xehanort told me to come and get you two right away! He says it's urgent!"

The urgency in her own voice was clear, and it was obvious to Roxas that even before he was showing his true colors, it was evident that Master Xehanort wasn't someone to be reckoned with. These three young people were supposedly his very best soldiers; the cream of the crop; army dogs. But they bent to his will like wire hangers.

When Ventus' running body started making him tired, Roxas felt himself seamlessly fading out of the memories and into senseless dreams that included bits of Ventus' past, Roxas' past, and just downright silly, dreamlike material. Hoping that his brain wouldn't skip anything too critical the next time he tuned in, Roxas allowed himself to drift out of lucidity and float around in subconscious dreamland until the time came to wake up and consider more important things.

**So, what do you guys think of Vanille as Axel's previous vessel? I was gonna name her Lea, but then I was like, nah, that's too mainstream. I've never played Final Fantasy XIII either, so sorry if she's completely OOC.**


	18. Infiltration

**Hi everyone. So I'm starting senior year in like, eight hours, and I keep thinking about _Senioritis. _I'm not as excited about it as Roxas, though. Think my last year of school will be as interesting as his? Lol I hope not. **

***sighhhhh* Looks like my summer vacation... is over.**

* * *

><p>"Psst! Axel, Roxas. Wake up. It's time."<p>

Roxas gingerly cracked an eye open, blinded by his overhead light, to try and figure out what bothersome thing could be prodding him when he so obviously needed way more sleep that _that. _It was Riku, who this time was not accompanied by Sora.

"Mm, whatime issit?" he mumbled, rolling over into Axel, who was sitting up.

"Around one," Axel replied, not a trace of sleep lacing his voice. Had he slept at all? "Come on, love, up and at 'em."  
>Grumbling and hating the world, Roxas tumbled out of bed. Then he remembered why they were up at such an ungodly hour. He bolted upright, though it didn't do much good, since the sudden action was making his vision darken over so he couldn't see a thing. He didn't bother to wait for his vision to clear; he got right up to look around for everything he needed. <em>Switchblade—check. Hooker pistol—check. Underarmor—check.<em>

Riku clutched his shoulder firmly, stopping him from his mad scramble. "Roxas. You have to breathe."

Roxas inhaled and his lungs opened up gratefully, flushing his system with relief. That was odd, when had he stopped?

"S-sorry," he said shakily, the adrenaline already starting to seep in. "I'm just freaking out a bit."

_Okay, _he thought to himself, _Whew. Calm down. No big deal. Riku knows what to do. We all know what to do. Get in, get out. Easy peacey. They won't know we're there until we're gone. Now, in the event of an emergency…_

He repeated the plan to himself over and over again as he dressed himself and double-checked his arsenal. They were to wear coats like the Nobodies did; black, to better conceal themselves in darkness and also to help their disguises. Underneath, Roxas wore plates of light, durable body armor, although Riku had told him, on multiple occasions, that he probably wouldn't end up needing it, should a confrontation arise.

He took to watching Axel pack up while he waited. Along with an arsenal identical to Roxas,' he was also bringing his chakrams, which Leon showed him could retract to a small enough size to fit, although a little awkwardly, into his coat pocket.

Fifteen minutes later, the trio was fully dressed, armed, and on their way to the warping room. Just as they'd reached the stairs that led to the basement (which Roxas had learned also contained, disturbingly, the boiler, their water supply _and _the power grid, plus the laundry room and the gummi hangar) Kairi came sprinting for them, from the direction of the cafeteria.

"Riku! Axel! Wait!" she cried, not even slowing down when she came near to them. She knocked into Riku at full momentum, almost sending both of them to the ground. "I had to see you off before you left," she panted.

She hugged each of them for a long while. She smelled like coffee, Roxas noticed. The thought stung him a little, that she'd been up since god knows when-or perhaps, like Axel, she hadn't slept at all-sitting in the cafeteria, drinking coffee in the darkness, all to see them leave for their death mission.

"Here," said Kairi, reaching into her pocket. She retrieved a star-shaped trinket made of sea-shells. "It's my _lucky charm, _be sure to bring it back to me!" She commanded, handing the charm over to Roxas.

Roxas was not nearly as close to Kairi as his two companions were, so he felt rather touched. He closed his fingers as sadness welled up inside him, and he threw his arms around the tiny woman.

"I will," he promised.

When the hugs were all said and done, Kairi's eyes were shiny and wet. "Okay. Off with you now," she said, sniffling. "I'll see you later."

It sounded more like an order than a goodbye.

Minutes later, they were walking out of a partially restored _Poir, _into the cold winter night. It was several weeks after the New Year, and the ground was covered with a fresh layer of snow. The storm had just passed over, which went in perfect accordance to the plan, and the full moon reflected bright enough off the blanket of white to illuminate their path without needing headlights. They wouldn't be taking the van this time, but the silent, black Rikumobile.

The drive to the Rising Falls took much more time than it did the first time Roxas had been. Riku drove slowly, as there were many people, camped out or otherwise, to maneuver around. For Roxas, the time it took was torture. To pass the time, he created the psychic web between them, and silently they began to plan some of their initial moves.

_I'm gonna park at the base of the mountain,_ said Riku, _You two stay in the car until I figure out where the entrance is. I'll let you know when it's safe._

Even in thought form, Roxas could catch the sarcasm dripping from the word "safe."

_We know, Riku, _said Axel impatiently, _And then we run about, look for clues to lead us to X. Hope to god we get the hallways memorized. Stay connected. Meet back up at three. I got it. What do we do if we run into someone? Me and Roxas don't have ninja cells like you. Our elements are flashy._

_I told you, _said Riku, _Don't attack unless you're sure they can see you, and they suspect you. Chances are if someone catches a glimpse of you with your hood up, they'll assume you're one of them. But if there's a confrontation, you can knock 'em out, but only if there's only one. If it's Loz, Yazoo, or Kadaj…_

He projected images of each name as he said them so that Axel and Roxas would know their profiles.

…_you should be okay. And if it's Vexen, you'll __**definitely **__be okay. Just… watch out for Sephiroth._

_Sephiroth? _Axel asked, _who's Sephiroth?_

Riku paused for a long while. Finally he brought up an image of a man who looked the most similar to Kadaj. His unyielding eyes showed no love, no kindness, and no remorse. _Sephiroth is my father. He doesn't wear the coat, and he hasn't cut his hair once in my lifetime. His sword is over twice as long as Squall's and it's really fucking sharp. It's designed to __**cut, **__not incapacitate._  
><em>What do we do if we run into Sephiroth? <em>Roxas asked.

Riku's lips curled into a sadistic grimace. _You __**run. **__And you better pray, god-child._

_Great. Thanks. Anyone else to worry about?_

Riku shook his head. _He doesn't trust Luxord enough to let him take the night patrol, as far as I'm aware. But if you do happen to run into him, knock him out quick. It doesn't matter how, just get it done. He can manipulate time, to a certain extent. But he can't fight worth two shits. Other than that, all they have are the dusks. And there are a __**lot **__of dusks__**. **__You can take them by the dozen, but any more than that could overpower you._

_What about Saïx? _Axel growled. _He was fighting Leon with a dusk when the city came down. I know he's one of them…_

_I don't know any Saïx, _said Riku. _Most likely they picked him up after I left. You'll have to be the one to decide whether you can take him down or not. And remember, Roxas, don't summon your Keyblades unless you __**absolutely have to.**_

_Got it, _said Roxas dryly. He felt numb from head to toe. He wasn't shaking anymore; he wasn't moving at all. It was kind of an out-of-body experience, like he wasn't _actually _getting ready to do all of this. He thought about Naminé. What would Naminé tell him to do?

He supposed she'd tell him to be brave, and to never forget what he was fighting for. He could imagine her now, sitting in her cluttered art room with flecks of paint in her hair, assuring him with a tiny smile that faith in himself was all he needed, and everything else would work out fine.

He was doing this for her. Well, for Axel too, but especially for her. This was so that her death could _matter. _It _had _to mean something. People can't just die without reason, without honor. This was to protect everyone that mattered from being like her, gone.

The car slowed to a stop. Behind them, all he could see was a road, littered with purple gravel. Though in the dark it was nigh impossible to distinguish color, the gravel still glittered eerily in the moonlight. Ahead of them, one little telltale stream, frozen halfway up like an upside down ice-stalactite, was visible. They had arrived.

_Good luck, _said Roxas as Riku cut the ignition and exited the vehicle.

_Be safe, _Axel added.

The first few minutes were agonizing. Roxas sat in the back, Axel the front. They were in complete silence, having received no word from Riku yet.  
><em>I found the entrance, <em>his voice rang through their minds like an angelic chorus from heaven. _They've probably changed the codes since I've been, so it could take a minute for me to rewire the system._

_Right. Keep us posted, _said Axel.

Roxas climbed over the seats and sat on the driver's side, next to Axel.

"I'm not gonna lie, Axe, I'm fucking terrified," he said aloud, leaning up against his Pull's arm.

"We're not gonna die," Axel said confidently, reminding Roxas somewhat of "The Little Engine that Could." Sure, he _sounded _just fine, but the uncertainty still lingered in his mind, like the awful smell of a skunk that had long since scampered away.

"I'm not scared of _dying,_" Roxas lied, "I'm scared that they're gonna catch _you, _and not me. And I _am _scared of them killing Riku. They won't even bother keeping him alive long enough to ask him what he's doing here."

_I heard that, _said Riku, _I'm in, by the way. The entrance is on the North side at the base of the mountain, round a twenty minute walk. There's a little crevice that isn't leaking water; that's where they've blocked it. If you slide down into that, there's a little pocket big enough to stand in. I'll wait for you there._

_Okay! _Said Axel and Roxas together.

"You ready, Roxas?" Axel asked.

"Nope," Roxas replied, "You ready, Axel?"

"Nope," said Axel.

"Let's go."

The terrain was uneven and difficult to traverse in darkness, especially for Roxas, due to his lack of height and the length of his coat. He wanted so badly to use his light, but he didn't dare, in fear that perhaps the enemy had men patrolling outside as well as inside. If they did, Roxas reasoned, chances were his team was already caught anyway. The Rikumoblie gleamed ominously, a dead giveaway.

Several minutes and stumbles later, Riku hissed mentally, _I see you coming. Could you be any louder, guys!?_

_Just shut up and wait, _said Axel.

Roxas raked his eyes over the area. Nothing looked any out of the ordinary in comparison to the rest of the mountain base. The canyon walls, made of crystal, were covered in other growths and formations. A stream here, an upward cascade over there, and—hang on, what was that?

The average human would consider it a tiny gap in the cliff. But, nestled in the darkness was a pair of gleaming eyes. Eyes that didn't belong to any animal, and they were fixated on him. He jumped slightly at the recognition and silently nudged his partner, who was looking much farther ahead.

_All right, Riku? _He asked with a grin as he wriggled into the tiny space behind Axel. The area ahead was pitch dark; it seemed to stretch on and on.

_Never better, _Riku replied grimly. _Come on, it's now or never_

_Okay, just remember your training, _Roxas repeated. He knew the other men could hear, but this particular stream of thoughts wasn't meant for them.

His instincts were screaming for him to _not _jump into the deep, dark pit of death. Every little alarm his brain had told him to go back, that certain death awaited. It was so dark he felt like he was losing his sight, the way a person's eyes will close automatically if they place their hands over them, no matter how hard they try to keep them open. He took Axel by the hand and took the first step forward.

The initial corridor, once past the crowded, narrow entrance, was rather long, and wide. The three of them silently made their way through together until a pinprick of bluish light became visible in the distance. From their position it seemed sourceless, glowing eerily through a blanket of darkness. Roxas thought that perhaps it were a cave insect of some sort, the kind that lured their meals to them by glowing. He remembered the day he saw the program about it on the Animal channel; he was home sick from school. Eighth grade. He never thought it would be relevant in a way such as this.

As they approached further, however, Roxas spotted several more of these lights, lining a neat row across the ceiling. They weren't cave insects at all, but ordinary, lame old lights. He had the strange urge to roll his eyes at himself. Darkness, it seemed, could play more rotten tricks on the mind than he'd ever realized.

When the first light was almost directly over their heads, Roxas realized that two smaller hallways branched off from the main one, creating an intersection of sorts. The next light signified another fork. And the next, and the next, until he couldn't tell anymore. He sighed a breath of relief; the layout was exactly the same to that which Riku had briefed them on earlier.

_Now what? _said Roxas. They couldn't linger, even if the light _was _very dim. They were making themselves sitting ducks.

_Now we've got to split up and search, _said Riku. _If you come across any stairs leading down, __**don't **__take them. That's where they keep the dusks. The barracks __**should **__be on the left hand side, so try keeping to the right if you can. Report anything interesting you see. They'll most likely be keeping him in an ornate, highly decorative room, probably close to the summit too. That's their style. If anyone finds that, signal back so we can back each other up._

Roxas visibly nodded and moved forward; Riku and Axel went to the left and right.

He pressed forward, ignoring the forks for now until something in one of them caught his eye. It was a glimmer of sorts, shining out of a hallway on the left hand side; probably either the fourth or fifth one Roxas was to pass. A moment of looking then he froze. It was an eye. One eye.

When the realization that this was a human being struck him, Roxas was almost startled enough to shout out. He felt a sharp pang in his chest, the kind one always gets when a particularly loud noise sounds by surprise in a suspense film, or when one finds himself on the verge of sleep when suddenly he is suddenly overcome by sensation of falling, forcing him to jolt awake.

"Kadaj? Is that you?"

Whoever the owner was had a raspy voice, one that Roxas couldn't recognize from any of the memories Riku had shown him. He mentally freaked out and started sending all kinds of mental signals to Axel and Riku.

The figure stepped forward, revealing himself to be a very tall man, a very _dangerous _looking tall man with evident battle scars and an eye patch. And that was just his _face. _Everything else was covered in black: like everyone else, this man wore the coat. While he did look rather tired, he carried an overall air of menace and intimidation.

_Tell him you're going to take the patrol! _Riku screamed internally, _you and Kadaj sound __**just **__alike enough, you could pass for him._

"I'm here to relieve you," said Roxas, fighting hard to keep his voice steady. He wasn't shaking so much from nerves, just the after effects of the scare. The man was graying; probably around ten years younger than DiZ. If it came to it, Roxas could probably fight him.

The man paused a moment, blinking his visible eye. "You sound kind of off, Kadaj. You're not still freaked about last night, are you?"

_Damn it! _He needed more information. _Guys, I'm going in._

_**No don't—**_they both started in unison, but it was too late. Within half a second, Roxas had withdrawn from both their minds and was probing around the area for his enemy's. It was very easy to find; he was surprised at how minimal the man's efforts were to shield himself. Roxas found and linked into his lifestream quickly. Thankfully, he didn't half to search for memories, either. This man was already replaying last night's incidents in his mind.

By the looks of it, he'd cornered Kadaj and was trying to obtain something from him. Whatever it was, it had Kadaj pretty upset. He was shouting, "_Xigbar, stop it! I mean it!_"  
>Carefully, Roxas withdrew.<p>

"Go to bed, Xigbar," he commanded, trying to fill his voice with the same kind of authority Kadaj had in his. "Maybe you've forgotten, I still outrank you. I'll let it go this time. After all, we wouldn't want my father hearing about this, would we?"

It was a long shot that his words even bore any kind of relevance to whatever the real Kadaj and this Xigbar were quarreling about, and even to Roxas, they sounded quite childish. But bringing up Sephiroth did seem to strike a chord in Xigbar, because he backed up almost immediately.

"As if…" the old man muttered. "I was just kidding, little dude, re_lax. _I think I liked you better _before _you got your silly little promotion."

When Xigbar retreated back into the little corridor and out of sight, Roxas thought he just might faint. He took his time in looking for Axel and Riku's minds again. Long-distance connections were always more difficult to obtain, it took him a good three minutes to find Axel again.

When he did, Axel was still fruitlessly shouting, _Roxas!? Roxas, can you hear me? Helloooooo! Motherfuck—_

_I'm here Axe, _said Roxas, clutching his head from the ringing. _Now shut up, I still gotta find Riku._

_Don't ever fucking do that again! You hear? Don't ever fucking—_

_**Axel. Shut up, **_said Riku, who was much easier to find than Axel, since, like Roxas, his Jenova cells required him to link with his target in order for them to work.  
><em>That was way too close, <em>Axel said angrily, still in no danger of shutting up, _we should get out of here._

_**WAIT!**_Roxas interrupted, a headache coming on fast. _We've made it this far, and I just got rid of possibly the only guard we're gonna have to deal with. We should keep going._  
><em>Roxas is right, Axel. We're twice as safe now than we were five minutes ago, <em>said Riku. _We need to continue._

While they argued amongst themselves, Roxas decided enough was enough and tuned them out as much as he could without losing connection. He tested his legs and took a shaky step forward. Now that his heart rate has gone down a little bit, his legs didn't feel so much like jelly anymore. Despite whatever direction Axel and Riku's little spats was turning in, Roxas continued down the long hallway.

Finally he reached what appeared to be the end. Although at this point the hallway split into two, going in either direction, the end was clearly marked by a pair of colossal double-doors, which bore an odd, heart-shaped insignia.

_Hey you two. Look at this, _said Roxas, projecting a mental image of the door to them. _What do you think? Should I give it a shot?_

_I think you should go for it, _said Riku. _I can't think of anything else they'd use a door like that for._

_Wait, wait, wait, _Axel shouted, _Wait for me to get there._

_It's at the end of the main hallway, _said Roxas, retreating into the shadows and wondering whether this was a really good idea. The door seemed almost too easy to find…

_I'll cover for you, _Riku added.

When Roxas heard approaching footsteps, he tensed warily, on the chance that it was a foe. But when Axel's unmistakable silhouette came into view, he relaxed immediately. He felt a hundred times safer with his Pull by his side.

_Rox? I can't see you._

_Don't worry, I can see you. To your right, _said Roxas, stepping forward.

Axel jumped slightly, then turned towards Roxas. Even though he had his hood up too, Roxas knew they could see each other.

_Man, how come we always get stuck with the icky jobs? _Axel greeted.

_Come on, together, _said Roxas, linking his hand with Axel's free one. The other one, Roxas knew, was in his pocket, clamped around his chakrams, ready to whip them out in a moment's notice. After several seconds and a few deep breaths, Roxas grabbed one of the handles and pulled. It didn't budge.

_Here, lemme try, _said Axel, releasing his Roxas' hand momentarily to try pulling. It didn't work for him either.

_Ever think of pushing, guys? _said Riku snidely.

Roxas scoffed and unceremoniously threw a good amount of his weight against the door, but to his surprise it opened for him. His heart jolted for the third time as he stumbled forward into the giant room.

If he weren't petrified of who could be waiting inside, he would have said it was cool. Like this room was _really _cool. The cave walls were illuminated by little torches, but it hardly needed it. The moonlight streamed in through little crevices lining the point where wall met ceiling, but that wasn't the most fascinating part.

The most fascinating part was the rosy liquid pooled at the top of the ceiling. There was a foot of water at least, leaking slowly through the little breaks. The walls looked like cut and polished crystal, and although the clusters inside were impossible to see through, they reflected the moving texture of the water perfectly. As Roxas looked around, he began to wish they'd brought Demyx along.

The interior was decorated like a throne room, or perhaps an audience chamber. An ornate throne was carved from the face of the wall itself, and perched comfortably on it was a man. A man who was clearly awake and alert; a man who was expecting them.

He wore the black coat, and a sadistic smile. His face bore classic Pridelandish features: golden, almond-shaped eyes, pointed ears, and shimmering blue hair, almost black in the dim light. He even had an ominous looking X-shaped slash between his eyes to complete the look.

"T-that's not Xehanort, is it?" Roxas whispered aloud.

He could _feel _the anger and fury building up inside of Axel as he replied, "No, it isn't."

* * *

><p><strong>Oh noez! I left you with a nasty nasty cliffhanger. All complaints must be submitted in the form of a review :P<strong>


	19. Meet Superior

**I'm a horrible person. Yeah. This is possibly the shortest chapter in the entirety of **_**Perfectionist, **_**and it took approximately for fucking ever and a day to type it. I'm so sorry, guys. My motivation's like, in the toilet. I've got like, five chapters written out on paper in advance, but I'm not making any progress. I did spend the entire summer writing a totally immaculate lemon for you guys, though. There's your incentive to not leave me… even though I doubt any of you are still here after I've made you wait so long…**

**Also, my beta fell off the face of the earth, so you can blame me for imminent grammatical errors.**

Roxas was rooted to the spot. He couldn't have moved if he wanted to. He stood completely still, clutching Axel's arm as the blunette retrieved from the floor a silver claymore that bore the same insignia as the one on the door. The Nobodies' insignia.

As the man crossed the room, he pointed his weapon not at Roxas, nor to Axel, but to the chakrams the redhead had whipped out the moment he saw that the room was not deserted. At this point they lay forgotten on the floor.

_Saïx… _Axel growled, both aloud and to himself.

"I recognize these," said Saïx. His voice was deep and intimidating, but his tone suggested he were talking about the weather or what he ate for dinner or something else of little significance. "These belonged to one Eric Sinclair, I believe. Quite a strong fighter, he was. These have shed my blood before."

He turned his golden eyes onto Axel, knowing but not seeing. "I remember the day I planted the bombs that ended his life."

If the rage was burning before, it was nothing compared to what Axel was feeling now. Hatred, loss, insecurity, sadness… it hurt Roxas just to feel it secondhand.

_Axel, keep it together… _he tried feebly, but he knew it was no use. An angry snarl ripped from Axel's throat, and Saïx's eyes gleamed as his lips curved into a smile.

"I'm going to enjoy killing you, Knuckles," he said, turning the blade of his claymore to Axel.

_Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck, _Roxas thought, panic setting in. He had to think of something, and _fast._

"Wait!" he interjected out loud, throwing out his arm in an attempt to shield his Pull. "Wait, wait! We aren't here to fight!"

_Roxas, what are you __**doing? **_Riku demanded, _What's going on in there?_

_Get out of here Riku, _Roxas snarled. _**Now. **__We're caught. Go, before they raise an alarm or something. They don't know you're here._

Saïx ripped down Axel's hood angrily, "_What _the hell _are _you doing here, then!?" he snapped, spitting in Axel's face.

Roxas sent his idea to Axel and hoped to god it went through before Axel decided to do something stupid, like get his ass kicked. It was a little crazy, but if they had any hope of getting out of here alive, they were just going to have to run with it.

"…we're here to join you," Axel said stiffly.

Saïx raised an eyebrow; in doing so the scar on his face curved in a nasty and unpleasant way, leaving his features looking similar to that of a grotesque and old reptile. "Nobody from the King's Men has ever stepped into our territory and lived," he said with dry amusement. "What have you to offer that makes you think we won't drain you like the rest of them?"

"Inside information, skill, addition to numbers…" said Roxas, pretending to count off his fingers, "Oh, and Axel's an excellent soprano."

"Who do you think you are?" Saïx demanded, tearing down Roxas' hood as well.

Roxas fought to keep his tone glib as he replied, "Oh, just your average ordinary Keyblade-wielder. My name is Sora; descendent of Terra."

Saïx widened his eyes, the hostility all but melting off his face, unveiling an expression of pure greed. He lowered his weapon. "A key-bearer? Show me," he whispered.

Roxas had never called only one blade to himself before, but he couldn't imagine it being that much different than calling both. The theory remained the same. He balled his left hand into a fist and stuffed it into his pocket, focusing only on summoning the black one to his right hand.

He knew it had come before he'd opened his eyes. When he did, he found his midnight black Keyblade, pointed directly at Saïx. He felt terribly unbalanced though; he didn't know what good it would be to only have one blade if his technique with it would be all out of whack. Perhaps he wouldn't need to perform any kind of demonstration right away.

"Good," said Saïx, the fascination in his voice unmasked, "You could be of great use to us."

_I can't leave you there with them! _Riku called, his voice laced something just shy of desperation.

_Oh, yeah you will, _Axel commanded, _I don't give a __**shit **__about any of the authority you might have over me or whatever, I'm __**telling **__you to leave us. If you don't, and you die, so help me I will __**personally **__see to it that Sora knows you refused to go home to him. Now get the fuck out of here before they all get up!_

"Why are _you _here?" Saïx hissed, regarding Axel suspiciously.

"I go where Sora goes," the redhead replied flatly. "And trust me, it ain't a picnic showing submission, least of all to you. You took my family, my work, my home, but there was no way in _hell _I was gonna let you take Sora too. I know who the winning side will be. You have Jenova in the flesh."

Saïx paused. "I don't trust you. But that judgment isn't for me to pass. Let's see what Superior has to say about you."

Roxas could feel Riku's fear. It was genuine and it was about to sway him into changing his mind about leaving them behind.

_You better not, _Roxas snapped. He wasn't only looking out for Riku anymore. This was about all of them. _If you get caught, all our cover will be blown. Axel and I won't __**have **__the chance to escape while they're not looking. Think about all the information we could obtain! We're another step closer to Xehanort. _

_If you aren't out and waiting by Poir in… 24 hours, I'm going in to get everyone to come and get you, _Riku growled angrily.

_Get somewhere safe, _Roxas instructed with a tone of finality.

Both doors behind them swung open, and Roxas immediately understood Riku's concern. He wasn't even _looking _for a lifestream and he could feel the evil eradiating from this man's aura. The temperature of the room took a nosedive as Roxas turned on his heel to face the man they called "Superior."

There was not one man, but two. They were both tall, long-haired, and wearing identical, devilish smirks. One of them wore the coat, and judging by the blue tint on his lips, he was the one causing the uncomfortable change in room temperature. One of his eyes was considerably larger than the other, and his self-assuredness was so strong that, were it not for his companion, Roxas would have been convinced that _he _was the Superior.

But no, the icy man looked a mere pawn in comparison to the entity beside him. Said entity had one jet black wing, a feature that Roxas would forever associate with Jenova… and Naminé. The coat he wore was similar to the rest of the organization, but unlike the others, the purpose of his was not to conceal, but to _display _the variety of weapons and torture devices secured to his body. Not that he needed any of them; the sword in his hand was long enough to skewer Roxas from where he stood. There was no doubt in Roxas' mind that this man was Riku's father. Sephiroth.

"There's no need to freeze everything in sight, Vexen," said Saïx dismissively, "These are our _friends." _

"How _dare _you!?" the one with the funky eyes exclaimed, "Perhaps you've forgotten," he continued, sniffing importantly, "That _I _rank number _four!"_

"Gentlemen, enough," said Sephiroth. He carried a low, smooth and serpentine tone of voice. Roxas could just envision that voice twisting and coiling lies among ranks like this, and around himself and Axel as well. "Now, what have we here? They look rather like resistance miscreants. Why are they still in flesh, breathing my air? Who has given them the divine right to wear our coats?"

Saïx cleared his throat. "They've given it to themselves, sir," he replied formally, "I caught them sneaking around. The one with the Key claims to seek a place among our ranks."

Greed and curiosity sparked unmistakably in Sephiroth's eyes. "A key-bearer?"

"Yes sir," said Saïx, pointing to Roxas. "That one. Sora."

Sephiroth swooped in on them, clearing the gap between them in virtually no time at all. Roxas fought to keep his composure beneath the terrifying lynx eyes that swept over him. His insides were quivering as though he'd been placed in front of god on judgment day. These were the eyes that would decide his fate.

_You have to __**want **__it, Roxas, _said Axel, _We can't pretend now. _

"I don't trust the red-haired one," said Saïx, "I killed his parents myself, I don't think—"

"Saïx, Saïx," said Sephiroth, as though reasoning with a child, "You sound a little edgy? Does he make you that nervous? Or is it… lust?"

Saïx's face turned a very angry red, "S-Superior!" he cried, stunned.

Axel snorted, but Roxas was flaring up quick. _Oh no, sneak sneaky. You keep your stinking paws off him; he belongs to __**me! **_He glared at Saïx and tried so very hard to keep from incinerating him. _Yeah, I see what you're thinking. Well you better stop thinking them right now, bitch._

_I can still hear you, love, _Axel thought, sounding on the brink of amusement, _You're being silly._

"Anyhow, I see no reason to say no," said Sephiroth thoughtfully. "After all, this is our territory. We have all the power. We have ourselves, if nothing else, a pair of hostages. If they are traitorous spies, that fact will come to reveal itself in time."

_By the time, Xehanort will be dead, you'll be on your knees, and we'll be on our way, _Roxas thought menacingly.

"Tomorrow you'll be assessed, and we'll see whether you're to be kept in the quarters or in the dungeons," Saïx growled sorely, "Vexen can show you to your rooms."

"I'll do no such thing!" Vexen cried out, flabbergasted, "Where do you get the _gall _to order me around!?"

"Do as you're told, Vexen," said Sephiroth dismissively, "Good night."

With that, he swept his cloak aside and exited the room, leaving the tension so thick it could be cut with a knife. The two men glared at one another, looking as though they might just forget about Axel and Roxas and fight to the death. If they did, Roxas hoped they'd do it quietly, because the noise would draw way more attention to them than favorable.

But after a few moments of staring and a significant drop in room temperature, Vexen irritably ushered them away from the man who basked in the moonlight. He said nothing as he led them through the stony, cold hallways. At least, he said nothing to _them. _An incomprehensible stream of mutters and curse words escaped his lips concerning rank, loyalty, and something about a bond.

"You two will be in here," he said flatly, gesturing towards a barred door. "I'm afraid you'll have to pardon the condition, this room is for the… better _behaved _prisoners," he sneered. "Don't think for one _second _that I trust you. I can see right through those pretty blue eyes of yours."

He stared Roxas down with wide, hazel eyes, but after facing Sephiroth, dealing with Vexen was like dealing with a goldfish that thought it was a shark.

"I don't recall asking for _your _trust," he replied coolly.

The temperature of the room, which has slowly been rising as Vexen cooled off (or warmed up?) suddenly dropped again to about thirty degrees. "You little ingrate!" Vexen hissed, "I suggest you watch you _back, _because I certainly will be."

He whipped around and stormed away, taking the icy chill with him.

As soon as the footsteps faded away, Axel swept Roxas into a crushing hug, which Roxas returned with full enthusiasm. They were _in. _They were _alive. _Adrenaline pumped through his veins as the magnitude of the situation registered in his brain. He wasn't going to die tonight. He and Axel still had twenty four hours, at the very least, gather information about Xehanort and the Nobodies' plans.

He felt Axel's sigh of relief too as they clutched each other.

"They're probably listening," said Axel out loud. Roxas had broken their psychic connection upon entering the room, but he could understand Axel's concerns for speaking freely.

"Oh well," he replied passively, shrugging his shoulders. He tapped Axel on the nose, "You need to work on your temper, mister. That stunt of yours damn near got us killed tonight."

"That cocky, pointy-eared bastard killed my parents," Axel growled.

In fear that he might have unintentionally gotten his Pull all riled up again, Roxas yanked him down onto one of the beds. "I know," he whispered, "But he's our ally now. Hurting Saïx isn't exactly going to earn us any love from the top man. They're totally screwing."

"Yeah…" Axel agreed passively. "Come on, that shit really wore me out. Let's go to bed."

There were two beds in the room, but Roxas didn't bother moving to the second one. He figured if Sephiroth could make fun of Saïx for liking Axel (damn him), then they could share a bed if they wanted to. He didn't want to sleep alone, anyway. He felt much safer with Axel, knowing that if they were ambushed and killed in their sleep, at least they'd be together.

When all the adrenaline finally ebbed away, Roxas found himself extremely tired, and surprisingly had no trouble being lulled to sleep by Axel's steady breathing. He could fear for his life again… tomorrow.


	20. Into the Belly of the Beast

**Dude, check it out, it's a chapter on time! Even thought it's really friggin short... again... Sorry guys, I've been having insanely bad writer's block. **

"So, what makes you think you are able enough to join the Organization?"

Sephiroth, and the three sons Riku described, were circling them in a wide hall. Similar to the "throne room," water was gathered on the ceiling, and from the cracks, sunlight was seeping through. Wow. Sunlight. Aside from the jolting realization that he was not in the castle, it was the first thing Roxas noticed upon waking.

"Sora and I both possess class A Jenova cells," Axel stated, "We've been trained in advanced weaponry, hand-to-hand combat, and Sora is a leecher."

A look of curiosity briefly shaped the Superior's face, but it passed as soon as it came. "A leecher? Show me."

Axel went first. Though it took him a little longer than usual, both of his arms were aflame up to his shoulders within the minute. His aura was so bright and radiant, Roxas could pick it up from the other side of the city if he wanted to. Tapping into his lifestream was easier than blinking. He inhaled deeply, and soon Axel's flames were extinguished, and Roxas had his own little flame. He shaped it into a phoenix and sent it flying around the four silver heads.

They were murmuring in hushed voices to one another, but the astonishment was etched clearly in their expressions. It was obvious they'd never seen a natural leecher before, but Roxas knew they'd achieved their goal. Sephiroth leaned toward Kadaj, who appeared to be his youngest son, yet the oldest ranking. Whatever words were exchanged seemed to take him off guard, but he nodded regardless. He dismissed the brothers from the room, leaving Axel and Roxas alone with him.

"Follow me," he said, like a host speaking to a guest. Yet there was so much malice behind those eyes of his, that Roxas had to remind himself that he was _not _their biggest enemy. Fear struck him at the idea that if they didn't get to him soon, Xehanort would be even _worse. _

Sephiroth led them into a white circular room with seats that stood ten feet off the ground at the very lowest. There were thirteen altogether, but only seven were occupied. All were people that Roxas had seen before, save for one. He was an inquisitive-looking man with sharp blue eyes, hair _almost _as light as his leader's and a short goatee. This was, presumably, Luxord. But who were all the other chairs for?

Suddenly, Sephiroth was lifted into the air, and it wasn't the work of his wing. Roxas recognized the gravitational force field, for Riku could do similar things when he was at his most powerful. But nothing near as strong as this. Roxas looked up to see that Xigbar was the only one with his eyes shut. The man had power over _space?_

"Good tidings, friends," Sephiroth greeted, after being seating in the second highest chair. "Today is a momentous day. I am pleased to announce that a new comrade has been chosen to ear the coat."

Everyone in the room, including Axel, and probably Roxas too, looked shocked.

_What!? _Roxas thought, _It was that easy? He said __**a **__new comrade… does that mean he intends to kill one of us?_

"Let us all welcome one of the Keyblade's chosen," he finished, his eyes gleaming greedily. He regarded Roxas as a most fabulous prize to be won. It was better than being considered an enemy, anyhow.

"What about Axel?" he blurted stupidly. At everyone's sudden murmurs, he quickly tacked on, "I-it works both ways, Superior. I'll only go where he goes."

Sephiroth paused for a moment. "Clearly. Very well, Axel too," he said. "But as you can see, we have but thirteen pedestals, and all but one have an owner, even if they are not present today."

"Sir?" Xigbar interrupted, "Sir, what of Riku? Obviously, he ain't coming back. Why don't you put the beanpole in his place?"

All eyes regarded Sephiroth. "You all know why, my colleagues. But if you all see fit, see it done. Congratulations, Axel. You have the opportunity to join our ranks at number eight."

Axel and Roxas were both lifted into the air and seated accordingly, Roxas in the lower seat, and Axel a rank only higher than Luxord, who glared viciously at him. It would seem that Riku had been demoted most severely in his absence if all of his brothers were ahead of him.

"Before we part, there is one more matter we must attend to," said Sephiroth, "Vexen, your experiments…?"

"Are complete, sir," said Vexen pompously, "Vanitas will be ready for battle shortly."

"And the other?"

The iceman paused, biting his lip. "I'm confident that he _will _be successful," he said, faltering a bit, "But—well, he seems to be gathering a will of his own."

Roxas didn't understand. Experiments? They were referring to a _he, _not an it. Bile rose to the blondes throat at the idea of that… _freak _conducting his sick experiments on people. The Nobodies truly were nothing but pure evil. He closed his eyes, trying not to shake.

"I see. What of our friends in the dungeon?"

It was Saïx who answered this time. "We have an estimated number of ten thousand dusks at our disposal. They can be assembled at your command."

"Superior?" said Luxord, speaking for the first time. He looked a bit nervous about voicing his opinion, but he spoke regardless. "Are you sure we should be discussing topics of this magnitude i-in front of this lot?" he gestured towards Axel and Roxas, "How are we to be sure they can be trusted?"

"Luxord, Luxord," said Sephiroth silkily, "Do you not see? The war is already won! If they are spies, I _want _them to hear this information. I want them to _know _their end is coming."

His sickly green eyes met Roxas.' "There is a traitor in your midst," he said, with a demeanor that almost reminded Roxas of DiZ. "One who, by the end of the lunar cycle, will have assassinated the heir of Ventus. With him gone, our road to victory is clear."

Roxas' immediate response was to relax. What a relief it was that he was _here, _then. Then, the entirely of the statement processed, and he stopped dead. A traitor? But who? But DiZ… DiZ said that everyone was trustworthy! Who had he been walking alongside, for so many months, unaware of their ultimate intentions of killing him?

Riku?

_No, _Roxas thought to himself sternly, shaking the thought from his head, _No, Riku's one of us now. He's on our side. With Sora. Anyone could see that. I won't believe it was him, I won't._

"Even if our little friend is unsuccessful, we still have Vanitas," Sephiroth continued, "Vexen, would you like to explain to our new comrades what Vanitas is?"

"Vanitas is a program designed to target a specific individual's genetic code," said Vexen, as though reciting from a textbook, "I took the liberty of trekking to the Keyblade graveyard, and what should I find but the ancient blade of Ventus. With a simple DNA implantation, swabbed from the handle, I have fashioned a puppet, a doppelganger, so to speak, that will be able to track the target, learn its weakness and…dispose of it."

Axel spoke in a bright, ass-kissing voice that really didn't suit him, "That's incredible, four. You've done some amazing work!"

Vexen looked highly flattered. Roxas wondered what Axel was trying to accomplish. He'd have to make a point of asking him in a moment.

"Thank you, Vexen," Sephiroth cut in, "Now, the Bastonian government is expecting us to attack from the North, from here. While they don't know the exact location of the base, they know we've moved. So, using the underground tunnel network beneath the city, the same that which we used to first attack the heir of Ventus, we will quietly transport our dusks to our base from the South. When the Keyblade master is disposed of, we will send the dusks across the great maw, trampling down the _pathetic _forces their excuse for a government have set up. That should lure out the King's Fools. The day of our victory draws near. Soon, this planet will be ours, and the rest will follow. Xemnas is almost ready."

Xemnas? Who was Xemnas?

"Meeting adjourned."

In one great wave, Xigbar swept everyone, including himself, off of their thrones and onto the floor below. If Sephiroth's intentions had been to frighten Roxas, well, he had succeeded. Every word spoken only made him more terrified of the enemy, made him more sure that Xehanort had to be disposed of, _now. _But where the devil was he!? They hadn't uttered a word, a _single word, _about his conditions or his whereabouts. Perhaps it had been withheld because it was the only thing Roxas _could _use against them.

The more he thought about it, the more likely it seemed that the entirety of the organization was only humoring him with the meeting. He was sure that everything they had just discussed had already been carefully and meticulously planned. Perhaps they, like Axel and Roxas, could communicate telepathically and had been conversing in secret the whole time. This whole thing could be but a ploy, set up to make them falter.

"Who d'you reckon Xemnas is?" Axel asked, once they were out of earshot.

"I don't know," the not-blonde admitted, "I was just thinking the same thing."

There was a short silence in which they wandered the unlit corridors aimlessly. It wasn't as cold as it was outside but, being underground, it was still colder than Roxas would've liked. Even without Vexen around, he was sure that, given a little more light, he would've been able to see his breath.

"I've been thinking," said Axel, "Me and Zexion get talking occasionally, you know, like when it's downtime and there's nothing else for me to do, and sometimes, we talk about like, linguistics and stuff—"

"Get to the point, Axel," Roxas said, almost cracking a smile. It was good to hear his pull talking in his usual run-on sentences again.

Axel turned a little pink, "Okay what I was getting at, is that the pre-Colonial Bastonian word for evil, or like, ill-intentions, was _zhem," _he pronounced it like 'shem,' "It's where the word 'shame' comes from. And the word 'noose' was derived from 'nest.' But back then, nest _literally _meant 'last living place.'"

Roxas was thoroughly confused. "I don't get it. What does that have to do with anything?"

"Roxas, what if there is no Xehanort?" Axel blurted, grabbing the not-blonde's shoulders, "What if Terra won?"

"You really think he'd be hanging around this lot if that were the case?" Roxas asked skeptically.

"He would if they convinced him he was on the right side. Think about it. He wakes up, essentially, after eras of sleep. Not literal sleep, but he's been cut off. Weak. What would _you _think if everyone around you were praising you in a language you could barely understand anymore, calling you 'the last living place of evil?'"

He had a point. What if it was Terra they'd caught, after all? What if they'd convinced him that they were actually the King's Men, as DiZ predicted? Roxas would still have to kill him, an innocent man, trapped in a god's body.

A rush of sorrow, presumably from Ventus, washed over him, trying to will him to cry. No, he would not cry here. He swallowed the lump in his throat and cleared his throat. "What are we going to do?"

"What we came here to do," said Axel stonily. "If nothing else, we should work on getting out of here. I don't know about you, but I think we've got _plenty _of information to go back home and work with. Even if we don't find Xehanort, or Xemnas or whoever, today, we could still have a fighting chance."

"And who exactly are we going to report to? I don't know who to trust anymore," said Roxas darkly.

He could see the hurt written on Axel's face, too. Who was sitting in the Castle That Never Was right now, grinding their teeth because Axel and Roxas hadn't returned; not in fear for their safety, but because they had lost their target?

"DiZ," said Axel, "We'll report straight to DiZ. If there's anyone we can trust in that entire damn place, it's DiZ. And Sora, since _you're _supposed to be Sora."

"Okay, but not yet," said Roxas, "I want to keep looking. If we have a chance to end all this now, we should take it. Before anyone else gets hurt."

Suddenly, the place was pandemonium. Some sort of high pitched alarm echoed shrilly through the empty hallways. Roxas froze. Had Riku come for them before he was supposed to? Riku… had he been playing for the other side all along? Is that why he seemed so unconcerned about getting caught?

Voices were traveling towards them at an incredibly fast pace. Confused cries and angry shouts reverberated through the caverns, filling Roxas' ears from all directions, making it impossible to target the direction from which they were coming. It seemed, for whatever reason, the majority of the organization was coming _right _at them.

"There they are! Catch them! Catch the deceptive traitors!"

Roxas whipped his head around rapidly, looking for someone other than Axel. Because that high-pitched squeal, surely, wherever it came from, _had _to be someone on their side.

At least, that's what Roxas thought.

From the shadows, a figure emerged, clad completely in black. Large blue doe eyes were fixed on him, but in the darkness, he couldn't make out the rest of the face.

"N-Naminé?" he stuttered. Impossible. It was impossible, he told himself. Just wishful thinking.

He'd been stunned for a moment too late. The figure sprang, knocking down Axel with practiced ease. Roxas, having come back to his senses, drew a Keyblade in one hand and called some light to the other. When the figure turned around, Roxas thought he was going to be sick.

"Guess again, sweetheart," she spat coldly. Roxas was stupefied, frozen solid. His Keyblade fell to the ground and de-materialized. He didn't even try to avoid the heeled boot that smacked into his face, striking him down onto the marble floor, beside Axel.

The last thing he caught a glimpse of was Xion's face, hovering over him as the black clouded his vision.

**You guys should review. Yeahyeahyeah. I really miss those...**


	21. A Conspiracy Unmasked

**Hey, guys. So listen, nanowrimo is upon us, so updates are gonna be scarce this month. As if I update every month anyway. The only reason this chapter's going up is because I lost internet for like, a week because of the hurricane, so I didn't have the tumblr to distract me from typing. **

**Anywhoosles, are any of **_**you **_**doing nanowrimo? If so, how do you plan on organizing your month? I have a lot of OCD things that I'm going to have to get around. For example, I can't stand if my paragraphs aren't more than one line when I type in web format, I don't like when too many lines in a row start with quotation marks, and I NEED to write long things, such as this and FTCT, out in a notebook before I type and post. Do you have any problems like that, or am I a weirdo?**

* * *

><p>Swimming around the brink of consciousness was not exactly a new experience for Roxas, but it got scarier each time around.<p>

He did not want to wake up. His head felt so unbearably heavy, but somewhere inside he knew he had to move. He couldn't remember why at first, but he got this terrible foreboding feelingthat if he didn't move soon, bad things were going to happen. Unspeakable things. People were going to die. _He _was going to die. _Axel was going to die._

Despite the searing pain in his head, Roxas shot straight up. A strangled cry of Axel's name escaped his lips as he searched fruitlessly around the pitch black. He couldn't hear anything but a sourceless _drip, drip, drip, _and he saw nothing but a dim light emanating from a distance. As his eyes adjusted to the dark, he could make out a tiny window. It was ten or fifteen feet above him, and it offered only a tiny sliver of silver moonlight to leak through and provide some light. The ground below him was stony, damp, and cold. Was he in a cell?

He tried recalling what it was that happened to land him in here. He remembered going to the meeting, and leaving the meeting, and then talking to Axel. And he remembered that Axel thought that the Xemnas they'd mentioned was actually Terra, trapped in Xehanort's body. But past that… what on earth had happened? There were alarms… obviously they'd been discovered. Someone kicked him in the face, too. Who was it, again? That much he couldn't remember. But they were wearing a coat, he knew that much.

How had they been discovered? Did someone follow them, and listen to their conversations? Or maybe they'd been bugged? Or… what if the traitor Sephiroth mentioned, they traitor to the King's Men, had come back to tip them off? It was all so fuzzy.

"Axel!" he cried out, to see if maybe his Pull was in a neighboring cell, "Axel, can you hear me!?"

"He can't hear you, Roxas."

Roxas let out a startled cry and fell backwards slightly, "Wh-who are you? Where am I? Where's Axel?"

The woman speaking changed her voice from the smooth, cold alto to a more familiar, much higher pitched squeak. "But _Roxyyyyy! _Don't you _recognize _me!? I thought we were supposed to be _friends!"_

Any residual grogginess Roxas had been experiencing evaporated on the spot. He summoned his Keyblades, clenching his fists around them. He could remember who the traitor was now, all right, and it certainly wasn't Riku. "I thought we were supposed to be friends too, Xion!" he snarled.

He swung the blades with as much force as he could towards the direction of the voice, but jolts of pain shot up his arms as they clashed loudly against metal. He let the Blades vanish and began digging through his coat pockets for something else to use. His switchblade, pistol, everything but Kairi's little doodad had been confiscated.

"Don't bother," Xion sneered, her voice once again changing from the sweet, energetic one he knew to one of confidence and malevolence, "Why don't you just sit in the corner and _pray _instead. After all, it's done so much good for you in the past. You and you little _boyfriend _will be dead by morning, anyway."

With a growl of fury, Roxas initiated a bright beam of light from within himself, causing a loud ruckus all around him from what he assumed were the dusks that Riku claimed resided in the dungeon. Xion stood directly behind the barred door. When the light fell on her, she didn't move, wince, or falter. Her pupils shrunk to the size of poppy seeds, but otherwise she didn't react at all.

Clutching the bars, he shouted, "Why don't _you _look me in the eye and tell me why you betrayed us?!"

She backed off a step or two, letting out a loud, mirthless laugh. "Betrayed you? I was never _with _you! Do you honestly _believe _that your moving to Hollow Bastion was a _coincidence? _Are you that naïve? Who _told _you about the photography program at HBU? Who yanked your little fairy head out of the clouds long enough to get you to this country? Don't you see? _This _is what I was created for!"

Roxas dropped his forehead onto the bars, teeth clenched, one frustrated tear slipping from his eyes. "All these months I blamed myself… and it was YOU! YOU KILLED NAMINÉ! How _could you?!_ She was your best friend! How do you just _kill _someone who trusted you so much?"

"I didn't mean to kill her!" Xion shrieked. "I was trying to kill _you!_ I should have killed you myself when I had the chance… She didn't need to die."

"You're _mad!_" Roxas shouted, "They're _murderers, _Xion! They—"

His words were drowned out by a tortured scream. It echoed through the stony ceiling from up above, reverberating many times over against the walls and through the clattering cells. It went from the walls, straight through his heart, like a knife. He could recognize that voice from anywhere. _Axel._

"Whew! I wondered when they were going to break him," she said, as casually as she would had she just finished describing her morning run. "He's a strong one. Maybe we shouldn't turn him into a dusk after all."

Roxas' knees quaked beneath him as he tried desperately to think of something he could do for his Pull. _Anything, _but sit here like a useless lump.

"Xion, please…" he begged, falling to the floor as though an invisible hand attached to the screams were pushing him down. "Please help me. Or don't help me. Kill me, for all I care. But—" Just as the echoes were beginning to fade away, a ripe scream filtered through, filling the cavern with the sound of Axel's distress once more. "_Goddammit, please! _Get them to stop!"

He tried to tell himself that it wasn't her fault. She was only a puppet. Sephiroth—no, Xehanort was the one pulling all the strings. But it was hard to see it that way when they were up there _torturing _Axel and Xion was just standing there, laughing at him mercilessly. He looked frantically around for anything he could use either to escape or to at least kill Xion. Or himself, for that matter, if that's what it came to. But he found nothing but his Keyblades, which were nice and sharp but useless for when it came to fitting between the little crisscross pattern of iron.

"What do you want, then?!" he demanded, looking pleadingly at her. He didn't care if he looked weak. He didn't care if he was making himself vulnerable to the Organization. They had obviously been looking for his weakness and they'd found it. He'd do whatever it took to get Axel back.

Xion's lips curled up into a half disgusted, half satisfied sneer. "Isn't it obvious? We're trying to break _you. _Think of it as…hmm, _payback _for the millennia of trouble you've put us through. Add that to treason against the Organization and you're marked for duskhood. Forget dying, that would be much too easy. We can't have you coming back and mucking up our plans _again. _Enjoy your last few hours of sanity."

"Sanity?" he breathed distractedly. He felt as though he hadn't been properly sane for a long time.

"Also known as heartbreak syndrome? No? Oh, how delightful!" she squealed, clapping her hands together in a heartbreakingly accurate impression of her old self. "You see, in cases such as this, when a person subject to the Pull loses the one to which they're bound, well, they just can't _take _it!" She melodramatically splayed her hand across her forehead, "You'll start to block out brain functions, one by one, until all that's left is an emotionless blob."

"_You're an emotionless blob!" _Roxas snapped. He stood up and spat in her face, only to be torn back down by another drawn out wail. It hurt even more to realize that it sounded as though Axel were trying to hold them back.

Then, all of a sudden, something snapped inside him, and it wasn't his lucidity. It was his psyche. He could feel the energy growing, much more powerful than it had ever been before. The pressure was so much that he felt as though at any second he would explode from the inside out.

"You've taken everything from me! You're not going to take him too!" he screamed, his light growing brighter with his rage.

Then, it happened. A telepathic force field erupted from his chest like an elastic band of energy, connecting to every mind it happened across. Xion's, cold, stony; how had Roxas never noticed before? Vexen's, icy, yet yearning, unsatisfied. Resentful, even. Riku's brothers were all the same; sadistic and sharp. Sephiroth's…unyielding.

He felt Axel's next. It was slowly being drained from him, but Roxas was delighted to find that it still carried that signature, warm radiance. They hadn't gotten to him yet.

The ring was still spreading. There were more people in the castle than just the Organization now, but Roxas didn't have time to think about what that could mean, because his mind had just connected to an essence that could only belong to Xehanort. It was like a giant headache rammed into him with the force of a thousand freight trains. There was so much there, more than Roxas could even begin to comprehend. Through it he could only distinguish one thing: malevolence. Trademark to that of the Organization, the intent to destroy was there, growing, infesting. Taking over, even.

Xion chuckled almost maniacally. Of course she'd known what he was feeling. Her mind was still within his. "You see?" she growled. "Your _Terra _is no more. Only Lord Xemnas is left."

New anger surged through Roxas. Despite the pounding headache brought on by Xehanort—or Xemnas now, as they were calling him, the psychic field was forced to spread even further. He was connecting to more minds, but by now, they were just voices added to the rising din of a crowded room.

One last mind in particular stood out to him. A cool, collected mind, one as sharp as his eyes but pure as his companion's. Perhaps it was because Roxas had spent so much time connected with him as of late, or maybe because he'd been on a constant watch for him for the last twenty four hours anyway. Riku.

_Riku! Sora! Help us! _Roxas begged, knowing all too well that every other damn person in the castle could hear them anyway. _They have me in a cell with the dusks and they're __**torturing **__Axel!_

Alertness was raised immediately. The same alarm from earlier sounded, even through the dungeons, and rage was a pretty common feeling amongst everyone.

"You idiot!" Xion screamed, "You'll ruin everything! Do you want Riku and Sora to die, too?!"

A pair of tiny, yet powerful hands clamped around his throat, forcing his light to go out and all psychic connections to cease so he could focus on keeping himself alive. "I'll kill you." She whispered, a tiny vein popping out on her forehead. For a tiny thing, she was very powerful. He wasn't breathing, and he was panicking. The threat she was making against his life was very real, and quite possible, she was going to make good on it. Part of him, in fact, hoped she would, just so he wouldn't have to listen to Axel's pain anymore. "I'll kill you, Strife."

"Not if I kill you first, bitch."

Xion might have died from the blow. Perhaps she was only knocked out. Perhaps she only feigned incapacitation out of self-preservations, as she was now outnumbered and clearly overpowered. Roxas never found out what became of her. He didn't really care. As he watched her body fall limply to the ground like a ragdoll, his eyes were drawn up towards his savior.

"Cloud!" he whisper-shrieked, not wanting anyone to hear them. "Why are you here?!"

His older brother rolled his eyes and ushered him to the side. Roxas complied, knowing that the full extent of Cloud's Jenova cells could be deadly. With a mighty battle cry and a powerful blast, the door was ripped from the stone wall by its hinges and sent crashing into the wall behind them.

"Let's go," he said. Roxas nodded firmly and let him lead the way out.

"How did you find me?" he asked as they hauled ass through the dungeons. The rows and rows of cells that lined the hallways were packed to the brim full of dusks, to the point where they had hardly any room to get around each other. With the clatter they were making, added to the scream of the alarm, added to the almost drowned out but not quite silent sounds of Axel screaming, it was a wonder Cloud could even hear him.

"It was hard not to. Right now you're like a psychic _beacon,_" Cloud said, "Which is why we need to leave _now._"

It was hard for Roxas to just leave. All those dusks were still down there, trapped, innocent souls, possibly even people he'd already known. But he cleared his throat and pressed on. If Cloud was right, then it wouldn't be long before he had nobodies swarming in on him.

Once on a higher floor (a better lit floor) it wasn't as difficult to navigate the hallways. The sounds of battle nearby made the location of their friends a dead giveaway. When Roxas made to head in that direction, however, Cloud tugged him back.

"We have to get you to safety," he said roughly.

"Are you _shitting _me!?" Roxas screamed, "Fuck you, I have to go find Axel! They're _torturing _him, Cloud! And I _have _to find Riku and Sora; they wouldn't even _be _here if it weren't for me!"

Cloud looked torn. Roxas knew he'd most likely been given direct orders to get him to safety. But he also knew that, if the same Cloud he grew up with was still in there, secretly he agreed with Roxas. Never in his life had Roxas known his brother to be a coward. But Roxas really wasn't in the mood to just idly stand there while he figured it out.

"Whatever, I'm not gonna wait around for you to make up your mind," said Roxas. "_I'm _going to find Axel. If you want to go back, I'm not going to stop you. Thanks for getting me out."

He didn't wait for Cloud to reply. Instead, he wheeled around and burst through the door to the room where all the noise was coming from, also the room in which he'd first met Saïx. It sat directly above the dungeons, so he'd reckoned chances were good he'd find Axel inside.

The room was cold as ice, which immediately informed Roxas that Vexen was present. The old man did not seem to be taking much part in combat, though. Just freezing the room to give his side an advantage. Elsewise, Riku's entire family was present, including Riku himself. Loz and Yazoo were prowling along the perimeter, and Sora and Riku were sword fighting with Sephiroth and Kadaj, who were both attempting to keep them from reaching the unconscious person settled in the "throne."

"Axel!" shouted Roxas, summoning his Keyblades, prepared to fight. Kadaj turned his double-pronged blade to Roxas, and Loz jumped in to help his father fight the other boys.

"Riku!" he whined, "Come back to us!"

"Not happening!" Riku countered, "Not like this."

Yazoo jumped in too. "But Riku, we finally have mother!" he cried, "Haven't we been waiting our whole lives to meet her? We're not supposed to be separated like this. Together, we can be a whole family again, right?"

"Don't cry Yazoo," said Loz, sounding almost like a small child. What was _wrong _with this bunch?

"She isn't mother anymore!" Riku argued, not without a hint of pity in his voice. "She hasn't been here for a long, long time. Either we all look out for _each other, _or we can destroy each other trying to get back what's been lost for longer than any of our lifetimes. Which is it going to be?"

Both Loz and Yazoo stopped moving and looked at one another. Loz looked to be on the verge of tears. Even Vexen was looking back and forth from Sephiroth to Riku, as if unsure of which side to choose.

"Idiots! Destroy them!" Sephiroth commanded.

Loz stood adamantly. "You've been a _very bad man, _father. Riku's right! The time for mother has passed. That Xemnas is not the mother you told us about! You said we'd be able to feel her. I can't feel her, and neither can Yaz. You're just doing mean things to nice people."

"Fine! Kadaj, take them out!"

Kadaj nodded and went to fight the three brothers alone. Roxas, still not totally sure of the subject of their argument, tried instead to think of the best way to break through Sephiroth's defenses and Vexen's wall of ice to get to Axel. If only he _had _Axel with him, so he could melt the wall…

Then it hit him. Mentally he calculated how much time he would have. If Kadaj's battle could keep them occupied long enough… it was worth a try. He tapped instantaneously into Axel's lifestream and, _very _carefully, tried breaking down the sheet of ice. He didn't want to do anything too quickly, or take too much energy from Axel, in case he awoke.

Occasionally deflecting a stray attack or making a few of his own, he melted the wall just enough to see a little gaping hole. Vexen was too transfixed on the battle—which fortunately now included Sephiroth— to notice. Roxas saw the opportunity and took it. He sprang forward with enough force to break through, Axel was within reach—

But before he could reach him, his concentration was shattered completely and replaced by a searing pain. Sephiroth, even though he was standing over ten feet away, had caught Roxas' shoulder with his masume, and was now skewering him in midair like a shish kabob.

"I might not have a heart anymore," Sephiroth said casually, "But I do know how to injure one."

Roxas gritted his teeth, trying to hold back the screams of both pain and frustration trying to escape his throat. It was like someone set a fire on his arm; the deeper the blade dug into his muscle, the hotter it burned. His resistance broke and he growled a loudly as the pain from lack of proper blood flow began shooting down the rest of his arm as well.

"Roxas!" Sora called. He screamed out furiously and finally managed to deliver a blow that landed Kadaj on the ground, bleeding, and unable to continue in battle.

Despite what Sephiroth said about not having a heart, he seemed pretty infuriated. He flung Roxas to the ground, yelled and stomped around for a second, and then Axel was lifted into the air, his head flopping around uselessly. A dark material surrounded him, drawing out the life from within him. Roxas had seen Riku leech before, the proper way, but he'd never had intents to kill. But Roxas knew, in that instant, that if he didn't do something, Sephiroth would kill him. He couldn't let that happen. He couldn't let them turn Axel into a dusk.

"Axel!" he yelled again, struggling to get to his feet. Once he had, though, Sephiroth's sword pierced his shoulder again, pinning him to the ground and causing him to knock his head against the floor. On one hand, this was somewhat of a good thing since his head was too fuzzy to process the intense _pain _he was bringing upon himself by struggling against the sword. It might even have gone all the way through this time. It didn't matter, he didn't care. He had to get to Axel before Sephiroth killed him.

"_AAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH!"_

Suddenly, the pain lessened considerably, and Roxas was able to get up. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Cloud swinging his giant sword expertly against Sephiroth's. But none of that interested Roxas. He was dead intent on getting to Axel, whose lifestream was so faint that Roxas could barely even pick it up anymore. But it was hardly any use trying. Roxas could barely even drag himself along, let alone take Axel with him, once he reached him.

"Now, Cloud," said Sephiroth, rising from the floor by means of his single wing, "I have seen into your heart, and you cannot lie to me. Are you not jealous of Roxas? Your kid brother, the Keyblade's chosen wielder? You can do so much better than him."

"SHUT UP!" Cloud bellowed. "I _know _my place, and I am _not _going to let you hurt my brother!"

He hurdled himself into Sephiroth, his skin glowing a faint blue from the energy of his Jenova cells. He was much faster and stronger than any human being, every sense incredibly heightened. The weight of his blade alone, Roxas knew, was enough to kill. He saw the sword sink into the side of Sephiroth's skull, fracturing it, and he knew the battle was won.

The great and mighty Sephiroth sunk almost gracefully from the air to the floor, defeated, to be encased in Vexen's ice. A ghost of his last smile remained on his face, as though even in death, he was still pleased that he'd made his final act tormenting Cloud.

The effect on everyone was immediate. Riku tensed, grasping his serrated blade tightly. Loz had actually started crying, the tears looking very out of place on a face as masculine as his. Yazoo was looking on edge as well, like he would lose it any minute. Vexen just looked stunned, unsure of what to do now that his leader had gone.

Kadaj was the worst.

"You killed him!" he screamed, "Mother! Father! Don't leave!"

He lunged himself at Cloud, but was grasped tightly by Sora. "Don't!" said Sora, as gently as he could muster. "You're hurt. You'll only hurt yourself more."

"You killed him!" Kadaj spat again, ignoring Sora. "You killed father. I'll kill you!"

All heads abruptly turned the wall as it, with a deafening crack, split into a wide enough gap to allow Lexaeus to step through. "The other members are rousing," he said seriously. "They are going to let the dusks loose through the entire stronghold. We must leave now. We'd be outnumbered well over one thousand to one."

Riku and Sora nodded to show understanding, while Kadaj still struggled viciously to get to Cloud. Loz approached Sora hesitantly, but once he was close enough, he struck Kadaj over the head, knocking him out, properly this time.

"Can we come with you, big brother?" he asked Riku.

Riku patted him a few times on the shoulder. "You may, but I don't think you're going to like it," he replied. "If you do, you mustn't struggle. You must do everything we tell you to do, even if you don't want to do it. You are our prisoner. Do you understand?"

Loz nodded solemnly, with Yazoo eagerly coming up behind him as well.

Roxas laid his head down on Axel's chest, unconcerned with anything else. It was rising and falling, and though the movements were shallow, his heartbeat was steady and even.

_Thump thump _Axel's alive _thump thump _for now, anyway _thump thump _are we even going to make it? _Thump thump _don't die. Please don't die _thump thump _I don't think I could live without you.

"Roxas, can you walk?"

The not-blonde opened his eyes. They'd laid Kadaj in the corner and bound Loz and Yazoo to one another. Vexen and Lexaeus were glaring rather strongly at one another. Riku was standing above Axel, and Sora was gently trying to pry Roxas off his body.

"I think so…" Roxas replied, wincing as Sora examined his shoulder. "He's gonna wake up, right? I-I can hardly feel him…"

"He's weak," said Riku, hoisting Roxas up so he could walk. "But not gone. He might be a little bit… different, but he'll be okay. He'll still be Axel, anyway."

Roxas shuddered. "Don't let him out of my sight."

"Are you coming with us or not?! We don't have all day, so make up your damn mind already!" Riku demanded Vexen. The old man lowered his shield and looked frantically between Kadaj, his dead superior, and Lexaeus.

"Y-yes," he stuttered bashfully. "That is—I mean, yes, please take me with you."

Lexaeus picked Axel easily and slung him over his shoulder, which was plenty wide enough to hold him without threat of sliding off. "This way."

"Wait wait!" Sora shouted. "Where's Xion! She hadn't come home by the time we left! What if she got captured? We have to go back for her!"

Roxas tightened his lips considerably. Hate and anger and hurt towards Xion bubbled up inside him. Yet he had neither the heart nor the words to explain it to Sora. Cloud spoke up for him.

"Xion's not coming back with us," he spat. "She's been playing us the whole time."

Sora's jaw dropped. He looked to Roxas, who nodded gravely. They entered Lexaeus' makeshift tunnel quietly. With his free hand, Roxas lit the way so that he and Riku could see Axel's fiery mess of hair at all times, and Sora kept watch on Loz and Yazoo.

"What do you mean she played us?" Sora asked in a little voice. "That just can't be right… I thought you and Cloud had always known her!"

"Not always," Roxas replied shortly through gritted teeth. The pain was becoming more and more difficult to endure. He didn't want to think about Xion on top of that.

Thankfully, the tunnel was short, and Roxas could see moonlight already. In a few moments, they'd be out of that prison and could figure out how to strike Xemnas another day. They would still have a fighting chance, especially with their new allies.

Just then, a shadowy figure began blocking the light shining through the end of the tunnel. It was a man, Roxas saw, but past that, there was no telling who it could be. Until they got close enough for Roxas' light to illuminate his face, they'd only be able to see his silhouette.

"Riku, do you see that?" Roxas whispered fearfully. If someone were to attack them again, he wouldn't be able to do anything to defend himself, let alone Axel. He was really beginning to regret not searching Xion for his pistol when he still had the chance.

"Yeah," said Riku stiffly. "But trust me, at this point I'm not above turning this bitch into a dusk."

"But Riku!" Sora argued, "That would make you no better than they are!"

As they approached the figure, Roxas' light began to light up his face. Pointed chin, white long bangs, teal, almond shaped eyes…

The man was unmistakably Riku.

Roxas looked wildly back and forth between the man he was hanging off of and the man at the end of the tunnel. Their Riku (he hoped, anyway) hadn't bothered changing out of his Organization coat, and the other Riku was wearing one too. They were exactly identical.

"Why are you outside of your quarters, Replica?" Vexen asked, sounding both appalled and authoritve. "You must return at once."

"Roxas, get away from that thing!" the Riku at the end of the tunnel instructed. "He's a _puppet! _A _fake!_"

Roxas tensed, but he made no moves away from his Riku just yet. How could a fake know his name?

"How could I possibly be a fake? I came in here with you," he said reassuringly. "After your 24 hours expired, I went to get Sora and the others, and he and I have been together the whole time."

"No we haven't!" the other Riku insisted with conviction. "Remember, we split up to search the grounds! He ambushed me and took my place. I've been wandering out here looking for you ever since. Seriously, get away from there! He could attack at any minute!"

Roxas' confidence in their Riku was wavering, and he could tell Sora's was too.

"I-I'm so sorry… I'm not sure anymore," he said sadly.

At that, Roxas removed himself from Riku's grip, only to fall against the wall and slip down to the floor. His mind was beginning to go fuzzy. Meanwhile, Riku (the one nearest him, that is) removed his cloak to reveal his own normal, boring ass clothes. The ones he left in. The other Riku did the same. Identical. They both sprang at the same time.

If there was any hope in identifying the real Riku before, it was gone now. With all the commotion of their clashing and fighting (with identical blades, by the way) now it was impossible to be sure of who was even on which side of the tunnel when the fight began. There was nothing they could do to help the real Riku, either, because they might accidentally harm the wrong one.

"Puppet, I _order_ you to stop!" Vexen screeched. "Do you hear me?! Obey your master!"

Roxas let himself slide diagonally over the wall until his head hit the floor. He was losing too much blood. His head swam as he tried to keep conscious.

A Riku crashed to the floor in front of his eyes, defeated. The clothing on his skin melted away, revealing a fleshless, red and blue doppelganger, stamped with the Nobodies' insignia. Roxas' light, which had been providing most if not all illumination the group had, flickered and went out.

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><p><strong>AN I really hate Xion. Like I was seriously gonna have Cloud slit her throat, but I figured it would be sexist to kill off two girls in a row.**


	22. Lost and Found

**Hello my fantastic readers! Remember how I said updates would be scarce this month? Turns out the only time I get motivated to do something it when something **_**else **_**is higher on my priority list. Typing this out is my way of procrastinating.**

**So anyway, I'm just gonna warn you now, I did something really bad in this chapter. It's more like a violation of fanfiction law than anything meaningful to the story, so don't worry too much.**

**Fun Perfectionist fact: When I write Merlin, I imagine him to have a heavy Scottish accent.**

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><p>Things from there got kind of strange. Roxas could hear all of the sounds of panic going on around him, only it was as though he'd been placed in a glass tank underwater. Sometimes he could see flashes of things, and semi consciously he <em>knew <em>that he was being carried on somebody's back, yet he simply couldn't find the will to move.

Voices went from clear to fuzzy as he traveled in and out of lucidity. He could feel chilled fingers feeling at his pulse, but it didn't register to him that they'd been there until they were gone. He felt the rev of an engine underneath leather interior, but he couldn't have told you that the vehicle in question most likely belonged to Riku. Who was Riku? Who was anyone?

Had there really ever been anything… other than this?

The environment outside his closed eyelids brightened, and warmth washed over his body. The change was almost enough to make him scream out in fear, if only he'd had the strength. Who were these people? What were the sounds he could hear? The vibrations underneath his body, the smooth feeling of the engine, that was the only reality he'd known. What was this alien light?

He was making out a voice now. Funny… did he recognize it? He was sure that there was nothing left where he was. Or maybe, he was all that there'd ever been. But there it was, a picture in his mind to accompany the voice. The picture was of an elderly man with amber eyes.

_Do I know… that guy?_

The environment underneath him had morphed again. When had he been set down? When had he even been picked up again in the first place? It was all too much. Nothing made sense anymore. He was fading… fading…

And he was surrounded by a white, white light. He got the impression he was standing… but on what? There was nothing here. But then, he heard another voice—clear as anything had ever been, and he wasn't even sure if it was real.

"You came!"

"Huh?!"

Roxas looked around for a source to the voice. It sounded… so familiar… so real. He knew that if nothing else… _she _must have existed before. And that meant, _he_ had too. A soft warmth touched his arm. A hand. _Her _hand.

"Even though you're about to break…" she continued. "That's a good sign."

Who was she? She was important. Very important. He knew that. More important than anything… now if he could just figure out who she was. All this white everywhere…

Naminé.

He jolted with the realization. Had he died? Gone to heaven, with her, maybe?

"So… why did you come?"

"I think… I want to be forgiven," he replied, tears stinging his eyes. _I let you die. _"More than… anything…"

"By who?"

~o~

"Hey Ven? Could I ask you something?"

Ventus smiled and nodded his head. He and Terra were walking together again, this time just around camp. They had officially been at war for five days now, much earlier than expected, but even then, no battle had been seen as of yet. Master Xehanort had explained to them that their takeover would be like a game of chess. The pawns were sent out to weaken; and many would be sacrificed, before the stronger pieces were sent out for the kill. While he wouldn't let them see battle, he did, however, train them until they were raw.

"It's a little crazy," Terra warned.

"Please," Ven laughed, "I don't think you could freak me out with your crazy ideas if you _tried. _Not after all I've seen and heard from you."

It was true, they'd been friends for as long as Ventus could remember. All three of them, really, were thick as thieves. They had seen the best and worst of one another.

"Okay, here goes I guess. Do you think what we're doing is right?" Terra asked nervously, looking around to make sure no one was listening.

"Elaboration?"

After another double-take, Terra pulled them into a nearby tent. It was wide, and there was a full mahogany table set inside, set with a three dimensional map of Hollow Bastion. Strategy notes littered the tables, transcribed on state of the art parchment, and fine wooden chess pieces, fittingly, were used as representations of their troops. Ventus knew all this already, of course, as the plan of action had been decided not long ago in this very tent. Ventus, Aqua, and Terra were among the select few Generals to be invited.

"What I mean to say is…" Terra tried, his brown eyes looking everywhere but Ventus, "This whole war. I know the three of us agreed to volunteer for it, and I'm not saying I regret that—well maybe I do. I'm not sure about anything anymore. I mean, what did King Mickey ever do to oppress us, in all the years we've known him? Do you really think that Master Xehanort is fit to rule this planet? Mass producing people with Jenova cells… it's not right. I swear, that manufactured stuff makes people go funny—"

"Terra, stop!" Ventus whispered-yelled frantically, slapping his hand over Terra's mouth, "He'll have you put to death if he hears you talking like that!"

"Exactly!" Terra exclaimed, his voice muffled behind Ven's hand, "Is that really the kind of person you want to become the new king? I've been talking to some of the people living in the Capitol, Ven, and not one of them has one bad thing to say about King Mickey and frankly, neither do I. Do you know what's happening right now? This isn't a war, it's an extinction! We're killing off our own fellow human, innocent men, with the power we've been given, but why? Just because we have it? Aren't you seeing the problem!?"

Ventus looked wildly around to make sure they still weren't being overheard, "Yes but, not here!" he said, still in an undertone, "This isn't the place! For the love of Jenova, _please, _keep your voice down! I understand, Terra, I do, but what can we do about it? We'll be killed for sure if we tried to betray him now."

"We can beat him, though," said Terra, "Don't you remember? You, me, and Aqua can beat him if we work together. We have something the rest of them don't." He extended his arm to summon his own Keyblade, "We have these."

"He doesn't go anywhere without Master Eraqus anymore though, not to mention the rest of the army that we'd have to deal with," said Ventus, frowning.

"We'd ambush them alone," said Terra, "And I think, _I think, _Eraqus is on our side."

"Yeah but Terra, three Keyblades aren't going to do much good when put up against ten thousand soldiers, even if they didn't have Mother's power," Ven argued.

Something about Ven's last statement struck a chord within Terra, because he burst out angrily, "_I don't like it when you talk about Jenova that way!_"

The moment came as soon as it passed, and the brunette realized his mistake. "I'm sorry. But I really don't like it. Jenova isn't our mother, Ventus. She wasn't even _human._ Don't you remember your true mother? I remember mine._"_

"But I can _feel _Her in me," said Ventus, "She's in here, taking care of me—"

"That's because Xehanort sucked the _life _out of Her and put Her in you and me. Do you know how they mass produce Her? _Do you!?_"

Ventus was starting to get nervous. Not only for himself, but for Terra too. It was very unlike the brunette to lose his cool, especially around Ventus, and _especially _especially when it came to Mother. Master Xehanort had taught them to respect Mother and Her sacrifice, and to remember to be grateful for Her gift to them every day, because in a sense, She gave them life.

Ven shook his head. No one had ever told him how they manufactured Mother. That was a job for the lower class of soldier.

"From _dead people,_" said Terra, not a drop of irony lacing his voice. "I overheard Master Eraqus training the newbies. You need to _kill _people to get her now. The real Jenova is gone. Once they're dead y-you use Her power to suck up the energy they had from their remaining lifespan and that's—that's how you get it. The more life a person was supposed to live, the more powerful Her materia. Do you see now what he has us doing? He's making us go out there and _kill babies. _He's trying to build a superior race! He's putting her in our DNA, one person at a time. But you, me and Aquathe only ones who actually have anything left of the real _Her _in us. The rest of them… they're all using each other. It's not right."

The argument was won. Ventus could see that now. Terra was absolutely right. There was no way he could let this go on, not when they were killing off a race of their fellow _human beings._ Just thinking about it felt like tossing a brick into the pit of his stomach. But it _still _wasn't the place! Not when any old grunt soldier could rat them out to Xehanort in exchange for a day off. This kind of talk could wait until they went back home. They were due back home to be married in a few weeks' time anyway. They could discuss it then.

"You're right," said Ventus with resign, "If what you're saying is true, then you're absolutely right. And what I'm about to say next, please don't take it as me not taking this seriously enough, because I am. We _cannot _talk about it _here._ Don't you understand how much _danger _that puts us in? We'll talk about it the day after the wedding, kay? The day we get off work? We'll be home then, just the three of us. Nobody to bother us there. "

There was a long pause, in which Terra looked like he was deep in thought. It was the kind of silence in which Ventus assumed each party was waiting for the other to say something, but neither felt prepared to speak up.

Finally, Terra said, "Okay. The day after the wedding. As long as we're here, I have one last thing I need to do."

Without warning, the brunette stepped forward and caught Ven's lips with his own, very quickly, very lightly, very meaningfully. "We're out of time," he explained quickly. "I need you to know that after everything I've tried to make us out to be, after all this time that I've been treating you like I'm better than you? I need you to know that I was just trying to fool myself. I love you, Ven. I know it, Aqua knows it, and now you know. I'll always love you, till marriage do us part."

~o~

"I never blamed you. Not once. You came for me. That's all that matters."

Naminé?

_Roxas! Roxas, can you hear me? Are you still there? They keep telling me you're dead. But you can't really be dead, can you? You just can't be…_

Roxas? Who was Roxas? Where was Terra? That voice… it sounded so familiar. It was a man's voice, definitely, a light tenor that lingered in the middle ground between hoarse and soft. It was full of warmth, yet fatigue at the same time. But what was warmth, or fatigue? Who was speaking to him?

_Who is… Roxas?_

The thought escaped the confines of his mind, but he didn't realize it until floods of comfort entered his system. Were they from the intruder? Or something else? Funny, he'd never even noticed any tension to begin with. Nothing was, until it wasn't.

_Talk about blank with a capital B, _the intruder said, _What about me? Do you know me? Do you remember me, Roxas?_

The white that was the only sanctuary for his mind suddenly morphed, and many other images took their place. Most of them were the same face, with a different background. Was it… _his _face? That color red, that color green, they all seemed familiar…somehow. The images kept coming, but he was sure they didn't belong to him. Not when he'd spent the entirety of his existence here. There was the face again, twisted into a smirk, laughing at him, calling him 'kid.'

_Flash_

That face, laughing jovially at him (or… could it have been _with _him?) as he held up a small strip of paper for examination. That moment, it felt good. Happy, even. It was a carefree time, before everything that was bad came into their lives. The memory was fond, and full of light.

_Flash_

A dark place, the woods, maybe? This memory wasn't as happy as the first. Well… maybe it was. But it different kind of happy. It was weighed down by nerves and guilt, but triumph at the same time. There was that face, _his _face, approach slowly, eyelashes shut and fluttering a little bit.

_Flash._

Darkness. No face. Only a voice, whispering kind words to him in the dead of night.

"_You know, Rox, I love you."_

Axel.

Of course. Of course it was Axel. How could he have ever forgotten? Axel, his entire life, the one he was bound to forever. His reason to fight. His entire reason to continue existing. As for himself… he was Roxas. He'd always been Roxas. Everything was coming back. He was pouring every memory he had of Axel back into the perpetually radiant mind connected to his own.

_I'm here, Axel. I'm here, I'm not going to leave you._

Dead. They called him dead. He thought of Naminé, lifeless, broken. Did he looked like that right now? She was just floating, vacuum compressed, somewhere through the null and void. Doomed to zoom around in space forever and ever. They thought he was dead! They were going to do that to him!

_Axel, I'm not dead! _He thought frantically, panicking, _Don't let them get rid of my body! Please! They're gonna launch me into space just like they did to her!_

He was so scared. How much time had passed since the night in the cave? How many times had Axel fruitlessly tried to talk to him? What if he was already packed up and ready to be shipped now, like Juliet in her tomb? A pressure was pounding in his head now. Was this it? Was that space, prepared to turn him into a flat pancake as soon his left the hangar? This couldn't be the end… it couldn't.

"Someone get the life support off him! The heart monitor's going haywire!"

He felt so heavy. The light was way too bright._ Whyyy oh why _did it have to be so bright on his poor, aching eyes? Was it heaven, welcoming him? No he didn't want to go. He still had things to do back home. There was no Axel where he was going.

"Roxas! _Roxas. _Open your eyes, dammit!"

The voice, though not _his _voice, was so urgent and demanding that Roxas' eyelids, despite the heaviness, were startled into opening immediately.

"Are you _you_ this time?"

"I'm Roxas…" he whispered fearfully. Who had he been before?

"We got 'im!" Merlin shouted triumphantly. Hmm, why did _this _seem so familiar, Roxas felt like scoffing.

He surveyed the area. He was in a wing of the castle that, prior to now, he'd never bothered to venture into; the infirmary. It looked like a pretty ordinary hospital. The sheets he lie on were white, his bed had little grey railings on them, and there was pink floral curtain, ready to be drawn around his bed if necessary. In all ways it resembled most an ICU, rather than just a low priority room, due to all the equipment surrounding him. A solid, unmoving, unchanging black window told him despite how professional it all looked, that somehow he'd made it back home.

His eyes halted when they landed on Axel. He looked awful. Roxas could honestly and truly say, trying to discount all the bias he had, that he'd never seen Axel look _bad _before. But today, his hair was unwashed and unbrushed, he had dark circles under his eyes, and his skin looked pale and pasty. Roxas would wager that he hadn't slept, eaten, or showered in days.

"You know, Axe, there's this thing humans have been doing nowadays," he said, his unused voice hoarse and scratchy from neglect, "It's called _sleeping. _I think you should give it a try."

Axel put his hand over his mouth as he choked with laughter and tears. From the looks of his red, swollen eyes, he'd probably been dealing with the latter before Roxas got up anyway.

"_Never _do that again!" he growled, placing a warm hand on Roxas' cheek. "_Ever. Never ever. _Can you even begin to imagine the _hell _I've been going through?!"

"Now, see here! It's a little early to be yellin' at the poor lad just yet!" Merlin said sternly, looking rather ruffled. "I need to perform a series of tests to make sure his brain function is normal! Or did you forget what happened last time?"

"What do you mean 'last time?'" Roxas interrupted, a million questions going through his head. "How long was I out? Is Riku okay? Oh, _shit, _the maw! Merlin, you gotta let me up! I have to tell DiZ—"

"If you don't settle down this instant, I will sedate you!" said Merlin irritably. "We can do this two ways. I can knock you out, and you can wake up in eight hours with a massive headache and _still _have to go through all the tests, or we can do this now, nice and easy, and pain free. Which is it going to be? I'll even let us play a game, okay? I'm going to ask you one question at a time, and as a reward for answering right, you may ask me one. Do we have a deal?"

Roxas huffed and crossed his arms. "But—fine. Let's play."

Axel held his hand as Merlin started talking. "What's the last thing you remember before waking up here?"

"A lot of noise," Roxas said. "We were on our way out of the Falls, and there were two Riku's fighting… that sounds crazy. Did that actually happen?"

"Yes, it did," said Merlin, "And before you cheat and ask another question: the real Riku is just fine, and the doppelganger is under secure observation. Vexen created him from data gathered from the real Riku. We're trying to teach him to become his own person. Follow my finger with your eyes."

Roxas did as he was told. "What did you mean when you said, 'last time?'"

Merlin frowned. "You woke up the day after we brought you home… but you weren't you, exactly. You went on a bit about Terra and Mother and something about playing chess. We couldn't get you intelligible. But we lost you again after the organ failure—"

"_Organ failure!? _Merlin, what's _happened _to me?!"

"This is a red pen," said Merlin, withdrawing said object from a pocket in his lab coat. "It has red ink in it, and it writes with red ink. Does every pen in the world have red ink?"

"What? Of course not," said Roxas, "Dammit, Merlin, what's been happening?"

Axel answered for him. "You've been out for a total of ten days…"

Ten _days?!_ The nobodies could have taken over by then! "What happened since?"

Merlin sighed. "You lost a lot of blood," he said, "and that caused your heart to fail. After several transfusions from a certain admirer—" he cast a glance toward Axel, "—your condition improved enough for you to regain consciousness, but then your body started to reject the blood, and that caused some of your other organs to fail. I'd been working on coaxing your body into accepting the blood, but then we lost brain signal. We had you on life support for the remainder of your days, until now. This is the first time we've managed to get you back since."

"Apparently we have the same blood type," Axel added, giving his hand a little squeeze. Roxas shuddered. He'd spent days on life support to keep breathing… what if he shut down again?

Merlin held up a flash card with a shape on it. "This is a rectangular prism. It is a three-dimensional shape. Is the card itself three-dimensional?"

"No," Roxas replied. "Are _you _okay?" he asked Axel. "You aren't the only one that got scared out of their mind."

Axel smiled weakly and nodded. "Just peachy. Riku tried this crazy thing, it works like reverse leeching. Instead of taking energy from a person, you can weaken yourself by giving from your lifestream to theirs. So they all kind of huddled together and filled me up… or so I'm told. Got me up 'bout twelve hours after we came home. Can't remember a damn thing past that fucking meeting though. I hate it. I feel like I'm missing something important."

Roxas nodded as relief washed through him. He could fill in some of the bigger details, but Axel never need know that he'd been tortured half to death.

"What color is on this card?" Merlin asked, holding up a flashcard with a rainbow.

"Well that's kind of a trick question. It's a rainbow," said Roxas. "There's six colors: red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and purple. And it's not on this one, but some people like to include indigo, too. Did you tell DiZ everything we heard at the meeting?" he asked Axel.

"Yeah," said Axel. "He's calling in our allies and stuff who are stationed all around the rest of the worlds. He thinks they're still gonna march, even with most of the royal family either dead or on our side."

"Without looking, can you tell me the color of Axel's eyes?"

"Green," Roxas said automatically, tiring of the stupid questions. "What's with them, anyway? Riku's brothers, I mean,"

Axel shrugged. "They're just weird. It's how they were raised. I've been told Riku was like that too, when he first came here."

"Touch your finger to your nose," Merlin instructed. Roxas did so.

"Can I ask the next question?" Axel asked. Roxas nodded. "What happened with Xion? You're the only one that really knows what went on down there."

At Xion's name, hurt flooded through Roxas, as it would every time he thought about her for many years to come. He could hardly come to grips with the idea that the only reason she'd ever been in his life was to get him killed. When he pictured her face, he could only see the happy, innocent girl he'd always thought she'd been.

He swallowed the heavy lump in his throat. "She… she was with them all along. She only came to Twilight Town in the first place as their agent. All so that she could lure me here. All this… is because of her."

They had never _really _been that close, him and Xion, but she'd inserted herself effortlessly into their group and charmed her way into making it impossible for anyone to hate her. And yet, she was gone… just like that. He was running out of people that loved him.

He didn't mean to cry. It was silly to cry. But it looked like he was going to do it anyway.

Merlin tactfully looked away as Axel hugged him. "It wasn't your fault, Rox. She had us all fooled."

"C-Cloud hit her," he hiccupped, "and that was it. I don't know if she's dead or alive or—"

"Shhh…" said Axel "Don't even worry about it. She's not worth it."

Axel was angry. That was his angry voice, and Roxas knew that if they ever did see Xion again, she wouldn't be receiving any mercy from him.

After a moment of silence, the lines on Axel's face smoothed over, and he looked thoughtful instead. "Hmm… you know what? Now that it's over and done with, I'm glad that she did what she did."

He must have noticed Roxas' face, which was angry and shocked, when he quickly added. "Hang on, hang on, let me explain. I mean, yeah, if she never tricked you into coming over to Hollow Bastion, then the city would still be in one piece and no one would have gotten hurt but then, it only would've prolonged the inevitable. And if she didn't bring you here, Leon wouldn't have found your picture and your name in all those files and had Sora run your background. And the King's Men might never have found you, and maybe the Organization would have still have dug up Xemnas and taken over easily.

Now, forgetting about how good that is for the world, that also means that I never would have met you. I wouldn't have run you over with my skateboard on my way into work, and then I never would have fallen in love with you. And then I would never have chased you into this place, and I never would have met Kairi, or found out how my parents died. I just would have lived the rest of my life being a miserable, boring old model, waiting to die without my Pull."

Roxas stopped to consider. It had never occurred to him that if it weren't for Xion, he wouldn't have Axel in his life. Maybe his life wouldn't have been _bad. _He probably would've gone to college, got some normal ass job in Twilight Town, married Naminé and had a couple of kids. That didn't sound _bad, _but when put next to living without Axel, it was just downright miserable.

"I guess I owe her, then," Roxas said finally, showing the first smile he had since he'd woken up. He looked over to Merlin and nodded to show that he was ready to continue the test.

"Can you repeat this tune?" he said, his voice definitely not as irritated as it had been. He whistled a simple, three note tune.

Roxas couldn't whistle, so he just hummed it. "Did anyone else get hurt?" he asked, remembering that he was still allowed to ask questions.

"Nope," said Axel happily, "Just you and me."

"Finish this tune," said Merlin. He began to whistle the beginning of _Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. _Roxas finished.

"How many of these stupid questions do I have to go through before I can get up and see everyone?!" he snapped. "Sorry…" he added immediately, feeling ashamed of himself. "I'm just a little irritable, apparently."

"It's normal," said Merlin with resign. "Your cognitive function seems fine. Repeat what I just said."

"Your cognative function seems fine," Roxas mumbled.

Merlin stood up. "I'll let you take a break from questions, but Tifa and Kairi will be in shortly to check your physical condition. Even if everything seems okay now, we'll need to monitor your condition closely. But if all goes well, you should be able to see all your friends shortly."

But Roxas was impatient. As soon as the old man left the room, he was trying to sit up. Just as his head left the pillows, however, he regretted trying. His head felt so heavy, it was as though someone had filled his skull with liquid cement. So he let it fall back onto the pillows, which Merlin had elevated nicely before he left.

"Ugh," he complained, "I feel like crap."

"At least you're alive to feel anything at all," Axel pointed out.

Right. Roxas still hadn't been able to wrap his head around the idea that he almost died. Technically _was _dead, and would have stayed that way, if not for the noisy machines he'd been hooked up to. He remembered the agony he'd felt when he heard Axel being tortured, and watched as he was literally stripped of his life. That only lasted a few minutes, an hour at the most. What must it have been like for Axel, who went _ten _days being told Roxas was dead? Roxas knew he certainly wouldn't have been able to take that if their roles were switched.

"I really missed you when you were out," said Axel quietly. It was almost a whisper. It'd been what? Two weeks since he'd last kissed Roxas? More? That had to be a record.

"Oh, come here, then," said Roxas. He wasn't sure if he was actually allowed to be kissing anyone right now, but Axel didn't seem to have any sort of resistance today. Or tonight, Roxas wasn't sure, since they weren't near a clock. Whatever.

When their lips met, it wasn't exactly tender or romantic, as it was nothing if a tiny bit sloppy. But certainly there wasn't any lust present, either. It was kind of like eating after being hungry all day. Relieving. This was comfortable; it was familiar. Roxas moved his lips slowly, taking in all of Axel. His lips were chapped, and he had a little bit of stubble growing in from days of not bothering to shave. But things like that didn't matter, when you were with the one you loved. It seemed to Roxas like he'd been trapped in limbo for eternity. He'd really missed this.

The heart monitor beeped once, loudly, screaming for the entire world to hear that Roxas' heart was jumping out of his chest. How awkward. The sound startled Roxas, making him jolt away. But Axel just sat there and giggled.

"You _are _a sap after all!" he exclaimed triumphantly, "I knew you were! I knew it!"

Roxas felt his face heat up, but no amount of deep breaths were going to get his heart rate down now. Might as well go with it. "Hey," he scolded playfully, "Get back here. I wasn't finished with you yet."

Axel made a happy sort of noise and swooped down to claim Roxas' lips again.

_Yes… _Roxas thought in a lazy, comfortable sort of way. He felt as though life were flowing into him. _I need this. Don't stop. Please don't stop. _He reached one hand up to cradle Axel's warm, stubble covered face. _You're here. You're not dead. Thank god you're not dead. I don't know what I'd do without you. You haven't the slightest idea how much I love you._

The kiss wasn't as gentle now as it was before. Roxas parted his lips slightly to let Axel's tongue inside and wreak all sorts of havoc. Though it was heated and sensual, there still wasn't much for lust behind it. It was more like they were making up for the time that they'd lost. As the slick muscle curled around his own tongue Roxas wondered idly whether his mouth fell cool to Axel, since Axel's felt so ridiculously arm to him.

"Looks like you're feeling better."

Axel made to pull away, but Roxas threw one arm around his neck, holding him there, and used his other arm to flip off the female voice that greeted him. He wasn't done yet, and he wasn't letting go until he was. Axel didn't seem to be complaining, anyway.

"Hey now, if you're feeling healthy enough for _that, _then the exam shouldn't take too long!" Tifa complained gruffly.

"That's not gonna work, Tif," said a different voice, Kairi's voice. "If you want to get their attention, you're going to have to change your tactics."

Not one to put anything past Kairi, Roxas finally gave up and pushed Axel off him fearfully. "Don't you dare," he warned.

Kairi smiled smugly. "Don't need to. All I need to do is threaten you. You did the rest on your own."

Feeling foolish and hating Kairi, Roxas raised his bed level a little bit more so he could see them better. Tifa's big brown eyes glowed as she beamed at him, looking thrilled to see him awake and functioning. Roxas looked over to Kairi, who, though she taken a bit better care of herself, looked almost as tired from worry as Axel had been. As soon as he saw her, he remembered their promise.

"I uh…" he started, reaching down to where his pocket should be. He found nothing but skin; they'd put him in a flimsy, granny patterned hospital gown. "Where's my coat? I have your charm…"

It was Tifa that answered. "I washed it. I set everything that was on your person on the bed in your room. Aside Axel, I mean," she added with a wink. "He doesn't seem to have gone anywhere."

Indeed, Axel had taken to playing with Roxas' hair and fingers, and also to kissing his head, neck, and cheeks frequently.

"What can I say? We're a package deal," said Axel serenely, not taking his eyes off Roxas.

"Right well, you're gonna have to detach yourself from him for _just _a few minutes so we can do this thing," said Kairi, snapping the latex gloved onto her hands in a menacing way, a threatening smirk plastered on her face. "You're not allergic to latex, are you?"

~o~

"Remember my first day at _Poir, _when Marluxia showed me the proper way to shoot a cologne ad?" Roxas asked, shrugging his gown back on.

"Yeah?"

"That's how I feel right now."

Axel couldn't help but laugh. The last nine days, eight hours, and thirteen minutes of his life had been all but unbearable. Now that Roxas was awake, everything seemed about twenty thousand times funnier. It was better than the time they accidentally kissed in the photo booth. It was better than when Roxas decided it would be okay for them to succumb to the Pull. Hell, it was even better then when Roxas (although unknowingly) let Axel know that he loved him.

"What? Embarrassed, under-experienced, and slightly aroused?" Axel teased.

"Ha ha. Just the first one," said Roxas. He shuddered, "I didn't expect my physical examination to be quite so thorough."

It was true. After making Roxas flex pretty much every joint in his body and checking all the usual things like ears, eyes, and throat, Kairi stripped him completely naked, insisting that they do a full body search for any kind of bugging device the Nobodies could have placed on him while he was unconscious. Tifa agreed to leave the room at which point, but Roxas asked Axel to stay so he'd be more comfortable. Which thrilled Axel by the way. Not the part about Roxas being nude, just that it was _him _that Roxas wanted to keep around to make everything casual and as non-awkward as possible.

Roxas still wasn't standing well, so it also became Axel's job to wheel him around in a wheelchair if they wanted to get anywhere, and currently they were on their way to surprise everyone. It was around nine thirty at which point, so the majority of their friends would be in the rec room.

"Why's it so quiet?" Roxas asked. Usually the rousing sounds of shenanigans, tomfoolery, horseplay, and nautical nonsense could be heard from as far as the pool room at the height of the evening.

"Things have been real boring without you here, Rox," said Axel quietly. "Believe it or not, folks round here all really love you."

Roxas didn't say anything after that until Axel pulled him over in front of the rec room.

"Wait here," said Axel.

"Like I could go anywhere if I wanted to," the not-blonde replied dryly.

Axel pushed the door open, careful to conceal Roxas and hide the grin that seemed to be permanently glued to his features.

Everyone inside looked so gloomy. And that was saying quite a bit, since pretty much only the ones under twenty-five (not including Cloud, who was twenty-seven) ever bothered to go to the rec room anymore. Some romantic comedy was on the TV, but nobody was laughing. Nobody even seemed to be watching. Demyx was strumming a sitar (not Arpeggio though, Axel realized), Zexion was reading, Riku's eyes were on the floor, and Sora's eyes seemed glazed over, like he wasn't staring at a TV screen at all.

"Hey guys," said Axel in the most depressing voice he could manage.

All eyes turned to him. "Hey Axel," said Demyx. "You're looking better. Any word on… on Roxas?"

They asked him every day, if he even bothered to leave Roxas' side long enough to give them an update. Every day he would reply 'no change,' and sit down, detached from everything, and stare off into space for hours.

But today, he allowed his face to give a little, revealing some of the grin he'd been concealing. "Good news," he said.

Everyone seemed to inch forward in their seats as he held up one finger and exited the room quickly. He found Roxas sitting there with his arms crossed. Apparently he'd missed them as much as they'd missed him. "Are you ready now?" he asked irritably.

Several cries of "Roxas!" echoed around the room as Axel wheeled him in. Roxas beamed as everyone closed in on him. Surprisingly, the first person to reach Roxas and hug him was Demyx.

"I'm glad to see you're still with us, kid," he said shortly.

"Thanks, buddy," said Roxas, returning the hug. It was an odd sight, one Axel never thought he'd get a chance to behold. He caught eyes—er, eye—with Zexion, who shortly after looked at them both fondly as if to say 'how cute are they?' Axel couldn't agree more.

Next it was Sora's turn, who took hold of the not-blonde and gave him an affectionate noogie. Riku was smiling like it was nobody's business, which was also a peculiar sight to see. And Cloud, well, Cloud was pretty much on the verge of tears. Apart from Axel, he'd been the biggest mess of them all. He kept going on about how it was his fault and he should have looked after his brother better.

"When did you wake up?" Zexion asked, "and how come nobody informed us?"

"It had to be what? A few hours ago maybe, Axel?" Roxas replied, shifting around in his wheelchair to make eye contact with his Pull.

"Sounds about right. We wanted to surprise everyone," said Axel passively. He watched as Roxas stretched his arms and yawned. It was so cute; it looked just like a little kid up from a nap.

After a wide-mouthed yawn, Roxas said, "I'm still pretty tired, but I wouldn't want to go back to sleep again, I don't think. I feel like I've missed so much. Like, I wasn't _aware _of the time passing as it did, but it does feel like I've been sleeping for a week.

Zexion nodded. "Your internal clock was still going. That's a good sign."

They filled Roxas in on what happened in the last week. It wasn't much. Mostly everyone had been busy building stabilized quarters ("or confinement," Riku added darkly.) for the Nobodies' converts, and DiZ had actually been out and about, issuing emergency summons to all the other branches stationed around the worlds. Axel had recalled enough of the Organization's meeting to realize that a war was coming. Despite the extreme lack of high ranking Nobodies, Loz and Yazoo had both adamantly stated that Kadaj wouldn't give up what they'd spent their lives working on so easily. If anything, they said, the losses would only drive him harder.

Axel didn't do much explaining at all. He sat back and listened quietly, having missed a lot of activity due to his preoccupation with Roxas. He let Riku do all the talking, and jumped in only when Roxas asked him a direct question.

He opted to watch Roxas, instead. He paid attention to the very tiniest details, like how the not-blonde quirked only one eyebrow when he was confused, or how he only used his left hand to accompany his words, or how when he looked more distressed than normal, he'd get a miniscule crinkle on the bridge of his nose.

It was not hard to realize that this war was very real, and coming very fast. Axel knew this, and there really wasn't much left for him to do but take in as much of life as he still could. And by life of course, he meant Roxas.

It was a pessimistic way to think, but really, the outcome was grim no matter how he sliced it. Even if Loz, Yazoo, and Vexen were seriously about joining ranks with them, that only left their number a dozen and a half, maybe two dozen if he counted their comrades from other worlds. There just wasn't any way they could match an army of ten thousand dusks, a handful of assholes, and Xehanort. Xemnas. Whoever.

Axel knew that by next month, most if not all of the people in the room with him would be dead.

* * *

><p><strong>AN I feel truly ashamed of myself. Swapping out Cloud and Aerith for Axel and Naminé. But it felt so **_**right. **_**I wanted to make it clear that even though Axel is the most important thing to Roxas, that Naminé is the one that really drives him. And I feel like Aerith in that sense is what drives Cloud. Don't kill me!**

**P.S. I think you're really gonna like the next chapter! It was one of my favorites to write, and it also took me **_**the **_**longest, hands down, to get down.**

**P.P.S. Go answer my poll**


	23. Indian Summer

**Hello hello, my dearest readers! I think y'all are going to like this chapter! It's definitely my favorite of all that I've done so far. Prepare for a CLUSTERFUCK of Disney and Final Fantasy characters alike, as well as cameos from some other things that I don't own (insert sneaky disclaimer here). **

**You know what smut word I can't stand? Nipple. Like UGH, I can't even **_**look **_**at it! And wanton. I can't do it. Every time I think of, read, or write the word wanton, I think of Wonton soup, and then I can't stop fucking laughing. Likewise, now every time I eat Wonton soup I think of smut, and then I also laugh and people think I'm crazy.**

**In other news… I WON, GUYS! I WON NANOWRIMO! 50,300 words in TWENTY SIX days! And the novel isn't even done! :D Of course, when it's completed, I'll swap some names around, play around with a gender or two, and post it as an AkuRoku JUST for you as a thanks for all of your support! **

**Here, have a smut! Happy Thanksgiving.**

* * *

><p>"I trust you all know why you have been summoned to this meeting?" DiZ spoke, addressing every person that was currently situated in the Castle That Never Was. All heads nodded. "Then you all know that this is a matter of great importance. Ladies and gentlemen, it would seem that Hollow Bastion is at war once again. After many dormant years, the enemy has decided to strike. I won't downplay it for you, comrades. Our time is becoming short. Our nation is already at its most vulnerable. The military is a joke and the government is in shambles. If the Nobodies make it through the great valley, at least in considerable numbers, they can and will seize authority over Hollow Bastion.<p>

Axel looked over to Roxas, who was edging forward uncomfortably in his seat and running his hand through his stripped, re-blonde hair. Axel knew they were thinking about the same things: all the people trapped in the city, that warehouse, the pathetic excuse for a Restoration Site.

"_I _will fight," said DiZ, "at whatever cost. I'll do it alone if I have to. That much is certain. If Xehanort once again claims reign over Hollow Bastion, I fear that the other Planets shall not be far behind, and that is something I would rather not live to see. The only question that stands here is; who here is also willing to go to battle? Let it be known, even if the Key-bearer succeeds in his task—" all eyes swapped to Roxas for a brief moment—"I cannot guarantee the safety of anyone here. Now, if you should choose to fight—"

"I'm sorry, sir," Demyx piped up, looking outraged, "But is that really a question?! We all know the risks, and with all due respect, sir, who the hell do you think you are to assume we don't? Most of us—maybe not me—but _most _of us have been preparing for this our _whole lives. _What gives you the right to say that we all won't fight for the only thing we believe in?"

He glared at DiZ for a moment, but then recoiled, blushing and murmuring apologies. Everyone looked expectantly at DiZ, waiting. It was possible that nobody had ever actually spoken to him like that before.

But to the surprise of nearly everyone, Axel included, the old man laughed. Not in a condescending manner; more like a triumphant one. "You have so much spirit, Demyx," he said, "Don't ever let that go. I commend you greatly for standing up for your friends. Please allow me to rephrase: Is there anyone here who possesses any special skills that could be in another way useful? We'll need a medic, for example—"

"I'm the most qualified," Merlin spoke up, "However, begging pardon, I must request that Kairi serve in my place. She is ready, and I want her out of harm's way."

Kairi was not pleased. She interjected loudly, "Hey! Just who do you think you're talking to, old man? I'm not some dewey-eyed schoolgirl! I could kick your ass down the street any day of the week!"

"Kairi, shut up and take his advice!" Sora hissed, stopping Kairi in her tracks. "We're going to _need _you out there."

She promptly shut up.

"You leave all the aerial stuff to me n' Xaldin, boss," said Cid. "We just done finished our latest prototype, and I gotta say, she's a real beaut. We'll knock the shit outta any tin can they send flyin' at us, and that's a promise, boss."

"Thank you, Cid," said DiZ (**A/N **lol I just realized DiZ is like Cid backwards xD) "Anyone else?"

A brief contemplative silence, until—

"Us, sir," said Loz quickly, nodding his head to Yazoo and to the Riku replica, all three of whom were bound to their seats. "We can set a diversion. Kadaj is a loyalist. He'll want to believe that we've come back home. We could help pick off some of the more important ones, so to speak. An ambush."

DiZ contemplated this for a moment with a frown on his face. "I commend you for your enthusiasm, Loz, but are you ready to fight your own brother to the death?"

"We can incapacitate without killing," said Yazoo, "And I can't speak for Loz, but me, I don't give a damn about any of the rest. They are _very bad _people!"

The mannerisms that the two brothers shared reminded Axel of unruly elementary students. They were quick to make rash decisions, and from what he'd seen, they weren't really the brightest.

"Very well. How then, are we to know that you really haven't changed allegiances after all?" DiZ asked.

Loz shrugged. "We could swear it, but that isn't good for much around here. All you've got is our word. But would the odds in your favor decrease so much if we switched again?"

"Ah, but a single grain of rice could tip the scale," said DiZ, "One man may be the difference between victory and defeat."

The three silver ones stayed quiet. In all honesty, considering their upbringing, Axel couldn't imagine them being good liars. If Riku was convinced of their sincerity, that would good enough for Axel.

"Right. Now, it is time to discuss battle tactics…"

~o~

Around dinner that evening, agents from other worlds began flocking in. Some used their own vessels; others used emergency military ships through Hollow Bastion's public gummi system. Regardless, they all came stomping up the stairs from the basement, which was where Axel and Roxas took to hanging out to greet the newcomers.

The first to arrive came through the portal, and consisted of an attractive, tanned blonde man named Tidus, and his companion, Wakka, who was also very tan but had soft, strawberry-blonde colored hair. They both bore the same exotic look as Sora, and Axel would soon find out from the loud, ecstatic cries of welcome that Tidus was Sora's cousin, and that he and Wakka both lived and worked on Destiny Islands.

The next couple flew in directly through their hangar; this time a man named Aladdin and his wife, Jasmine from Agrabah. According to them, she was royalty in their world, which gave the King's Men a very firm grip upon that world's happenings.

Coming from Stateside was none other than the current president of the United States of America, from Earth. He didn't introduce himself by name, he simply asked them to call him "Mr. President." He was surrounded by men with suits who all wore watches that could project images onto thin air and were connected by chips to a human's own cerebral cortex. Earth was about 300 years ahead of Hollow Bastion technology wise, and the president pretentiously sniffed around for a moment and asked to be shown his living quarters. In Axel's opinion, he was a cocky bastard and it was best to just avoid him when possible. According to Leon, the man had flown over some ten dozen troops of the National Guard over to aid Hollow Bastion and recruit some soldiers for themselves, and that was the only reason DiZ put up with him.

The next bunch to come through was much livelier. The three called themselves the Gull Wings, from Radiant Garden, each with their own set of real wings, genetically given to them before birth. Radiant Garden specialized in genetic modification, which is why so much came out of there in terms of advertisement. The first one, who wore more accessories than clothing, introduced herself as Rikku (not to be confused with Riku) and she was blonde, bodacious, and beautiful.

Her two friends, thankfully, were wearing more than she was. The brunette curtsied and introduced herself as Yuna, and began eccentrically babbling about how great it was in Hollow Bastion, and "like, what an honor it is to be in the famous _Poir." _The last girl, Paine, was the most down to earth by far, but if nothing else was very, very creepy. Her parents had modified her to have blood red eyes, jet black, batlike wings, and long, curved feline claws. Not to mention they'd named her Paine. The style that which she chose to keep was slightly androgynous, but all in all, she was okay.

Axel found out that the three girls, like him, had grown up with modeling as their cover job. After discovering this common ground, he was not so off-put by them and was able to hold a decent conversation.

By the following morning, the group from Twilight Town had arrived. Axel didn't recognize any of them, but apparently Roxas had, because when they entered the cafeteria, Roxas choked on his coffee and sputtered, "_Seifer?!"_

Seifer, as Roxas would later inform Axel, was the source of most if not all the trouble Roxas had ever gotten into growing up. Their own two posses rivaled one another's, but as self-appointed 'head of the town's disciplinary committee,' Seifer's gang always had the upper hand and had never hesitated to make Roxas' life miserable.

"That's right," Seifer sneered. In Axel's opinion, he looked like a complete douchebag, and that was _before _he'd been given time to form a bias. And also a closet case. Just saying. Seriously, the man wore a beanie, a vest, _and _a _belly shirt, _for goodness' sake. "And don't think this changes anything. You might be some Keyblade master or the prodigal child or whatever, but I can still kick your ass, chickenwuss."

"Yeah, Seifer's still number one, y'know?" the big one next to him challenged. "And don't you forget it!"

The other two stayed silent until the group walked away. Along with Seifer and the big one, who was named Rai, there was a girl with silver-blonde hair, who Roxas introduced as Fuu, and a very small boy who kept his face hidden, called Vivi. Axel could tell that Roxas wasn't thrilled to be fighting side by side with old enemies instead of against them, but the blonde manfully insisted that a common enemy was much more important to be mindful of than some old rivalry.

By noon, Olympia's one and only representative had arrived; a short, stout body-builder named Phil. From what Axel had seen, which wasn't really much, he was fairly irritable and a little nutty. When Axel asked what his profession was, he jerkily replied, "Three words: Keeping. Your ass. Alive," and then he stalked off, muttering, "Rule number twenty six…"

After Phil, Axel and Roxas agreed to quit wandering around the basement greeting people and instead go to the elemental room to get some training in. When they arrived, Zexion and Demyx were already there, trying to get Demyx's fighting skills up to par. Axel offered to spar with him in turns, but every time the poor guy actually landed a hit on him, he would cry "I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" and refuse to fight again for the following fifteen minutes.

Aladdin had also come to join and, after many questions about the room's reinforcements and elemental composition (Agrabah was considerably further behind than Hollow Bastion on the technology scale), he showed them the massive sandstorms he could create using his own Jenova cells. Needless to say, the room _almost _became crowded as more people showed up to practice offensive battle within the sandstorm. When Xaldin entered, all hell broke loose. Combining both his and Aladdin's powers resulted in such powerful sandsweeps and dust devils that every single person in the room became incapacitated and had to take a break.

Dinner. Was. Chaos. Contrary to what Axel had previously believed, their number had more than doubled with all the new arrivals. Tables were packed with friends and foreigners alike, all intermingling and chattering away, creating a wonderful mixture of accents and ideals. But that wasn't what made it chaotic. Take dinner every night, right? Then amplify that by like, a hundred.

It started when a Pridelandish fellow, a handsome, dark-skinned man named Mufasa, sat down a whoopee cushion planted by Zanarkand's representative, Kefka. Kefka was, undeniably, completely, downright _batshit _insane. Not only did he dress like a jester, but oftentimes he giggled to himself for no apparent reason and pranced around proclaiming his world domination. Cid informed them (also originally being from Zanarkand) that Kefka was highly unstable, but had unparalleled battle skills and an uncontrollable thirst for power. Ergo, let him at someone _else _who yearned world domination, and he turned them into mince meat.

Anyway, it didn't take long for everyone else to find out what Mufasa's cells enabled. He whipped around and animalistically let out a feral snarl in Kefka's direction, which then became a roar so loud that it cracked and shattered one of the eight layers of glass (each a solid foot each, Axel was reminded) that kept them from being sucked out into space.

Kefka simply jumped up and down and giggled, "Ooh, how delightful!"

Meanwhile, Mushu, one of Skyrim's three agents, jumped to his feet, clutching his ears, and proved that Axel was no longer that only Pyrokleptic in the vicinity. Great jets of fire escaped from within his _mouth, _rather than his hands, in between shouts of what Axel could only assumed were swearwords of the *Dragon Tongue.

The couple that Axel and Roxas got along best with, Neku, and his Pull, Joshua from Shibuya, excused themselves to join the fray simply because they could. They had the most unique way of fighting that Axel had seen so far. Rather than using abilities naturally woven into their DNA (they had none), they had found a way to compress the synthetic materia collected and protected by the resistance, and harness the power contained within them by means of manufactured pins. All they had to do was press, touch, or hold one of the dozens of pinned attached to their clothing, and boom. That pin's power was theirs. They had everything from shields to elements to heightened aerobic abilities, the only drawback being that they needed at least one free hand to use them.

At this point, Axel and Roxas simultaneously agreed to leave the cafeteria in order to avoid any other damage that could be inflicted by the clashing powers, and who should they run into but Reno. _Literally _run into, as in, send flying to the ground.

"Hey Axel?" asked Roxas, who, like the others had fallen down and was rubbing his head.

"Yes Roxas?"

"Correct me if I'm wrong, as you may have just given me a concussion, but isn't Zexion still in the cafeteria?" said Roxas.

"That's right," said Axel, "What's your point?"

"Why am I seeing two of you?"

Axel couldn't help but laugh, and neither could Reno, or any of the three others he'd come with. "Nice to meet you too, yo! My name's Reno, the cooler, hotter older brother!" then he tapped on his forehead and said, in a very convincing impression of Axel, "Got it memorized?"

Axel was momentarily stunted. On one hand, he hadn't seen Reno in person since the day of his parents' funeral, and honestly, he'd really, really missed him. On the other, Axel still hadn't forgiven him for all the secrets he'd kept over the years and for leaving to go to Midgar in the first place.

After a moment of tense silence, Axel decided to get the best of both. He punched Reno square in the jaw, sending him sprawling. And then, just as Reno's friends were getting ready to react, he helped him up and hugged him as tightly as he possibly could.

"The next time you even _think _about leaving me for that long," Axel growled, "I'll aim a lot lower than that. And instead of mangling your face, I'll make sure to _permanently _disable you from having children."

"Yeah, yeah, I get it, I missed you too," said Reno, shoving Axel off him. "Hey, is this him, yo? That blue-eyed sex toy you were telling me about?"

"He's kidding," Axel interjected hastily.

Reno laughed barkishly. "It is! Oh my gosh, Axel you dog, he's so cute!" he gushed. He approached Roxas and circled him, earning some very apprehensive stares from the blonde. "I know I just did this like, five seconds ago, but hi! I'm Reno, this idiots big brother and judging by your demeanor, body of a prepubescent girl, and the fact that Axel looks like he's gonna kill me if I come any closer, you must be Axel's Pull! Roxas, I believe?"

"Reno, would you shut the f—wait, how'd you guess?" said Axel, slightly taken aback.

"Uhh, I think I just said. Demeanor, body of—"

"No no, I get that you know it's _Roxas, _("Hey!" Roxas cried indignantly) but how'd you figure out he was my Pull?"

Reno snorted. "Well maybe if you'd _call _at a semi decent time once in a while, you'd know I found one of my own. And I figure that it can't look much different on you as it does me, since we might as well be twins."

Axel went bug-eyed. "You have a Pull? _You? _For real?"

"Yep!" his brother replied with a grin. He turned around and dragged a rather reluctant man with mocha skin and a bald head towards them. The man gritted his teeth but offered a quiet nod to both Axel and Roxas. "He's rude," Reno explained.

"How do you figure?" Axel asked, confused. "_You're _the one that's pushing him around."

To Axel's surprise, Reno's apparent Pull quivered his lip, and then he keeled over, a deep, rumbling laugh shaking through him. Reno was quickly on the ground laughing too, leaving Axel and Roxas to exchange hopelessly confused looks.

"Forgive me," said Reno's Pull in an intimidating baritone. "My _name _is Rude. It isn't a very unusual name in Midgar, but the translation into the common tongue can be something of a hindrance."

Roxas was quicker to get it than Axel. "Yeah, my brother has the same problem," he said with a nod of understanding. "His dad was from Midgar too, and he named him Cloud, of all things. Growing up, all our friends used to think our parents were hippies."

Rude cracked a smile at that. "Looks like we have some things in common."

A moment of silence passed between them in which Axel assumed they were, in their own quiet, tough guy kind of way of doing things, establishing a bond of peace and mutual respect for one another. After the moment was gone, Roxas turned to Reno.

"So you're Reno," he said, with a mischievous glint in his eyes that made Axel feel slightly nervous. "I've heard all sorts about you. You look a lot more like Axel than I anticipated, though."

"Hey now!" said Reno indignantly. "First of all, I don't look like Axel, Axel looks like _me. _I got three years' seniority on his ass to prove it. And secondly, you can't listen to anything this buffoon has to say about me! He's totally prejudiced!"

"You call it prejudice, I call it experience," Axel countered lazily.

"I must say, I agree with Axel on this one," said Rude.

Reno looked wildly between back and forth between them. "What, now you're taking his side too?! That's no cool, yo," he exclaimed, looking crestfallen. He hung his head. "You all hate me."

A door opening and closing caused the group to look over to the entrance of the cafeteria. Zexion and Demyx were just exiting, opening the door to all the sounds of excitement and then closing it again. As soon as Demyx's sights zeroed in on Reno, the corners of his lips twitched up, and he burst out laughing. "Reno!" he shouted between giggles. "Nice to finally see you in person."

Axel put his face in his hands. He had no clue what Demyx's problem was, but whatever it was, it probably was not helping Reno's impression of him any. Axel could tell that he wasn't amused. But thankfully, he wasn't being hostile yet, either.

"I recognize you," the redhead said evenly. "You must be Demyx. Not that it's not an absolute charm to meet you, but would you mind cluing us in on what the hell is so funny?"

Axel could tell he was trying, but the irritation was starting to seep through. Demyx waved it off as if it were nothing important, but he still seemed to have trouble relenting enough to compose himself. "I'm—sorry!" he gasped. "It's not you! I double dog pinky promise it isn't you! I just had a totally inappropriate thought!"

He bent down slightly, just enough to whisper whatever had made him laugh so profusely into Zexion's ear. His one visible eye widened considerably before not only did he turn red, but he broke into a wide grin as well, shouting 'PAH!' and began laughing as well. Axel stared, with round wide eyes, wondering what on this dismal fucking planet could be so damn funny as to cause _Zexion _to laugh like that.

"Zex? A little help here?" he asked weakly. Unlike Demyx, Zexion was able to retain a relatively straight face with much more ease.

"Axel and Roxas sandwich," he said, looking slightly uncomfortable. He looked as though he were resisting the urge to laugh for a second time as he whispered a reply back to his Pull. Whatever he said was obviously too much because Demyx was sent sprawling in another fit of streaming giggles. Meanwhile, Roxas seemed to be attempting to merge himself with Axel's shoulder.

"I'm sorry in advance for anything else they say to you," said Axel to Reno with his hand on his forehead. "Growing up with you seems to have trained me to keep only the company of bigoted idiots. Oh, and Roxas too. He doesn't count."

"Oh, gimme a break, Axe, you'd have to admit that'd be hot!" said Demyx, who seemed to have finally calmed himself down enough to manage words. "Imagine if we got _Cloud _in on it too? We'd have a double decker! Credit goes to Zexion for that one though, not me. He's just too polite to say it out loud."

"As tempting as that sounds, I doubt Rude would allow that," Roxas scoffed, sending a pleading look to Rude that clearly said, _Please, help me end this fuckery._

But Rude heeded it not. As a matter of fact, he grinned a little as he said, "If I'm allowed a front row seat and a video camera, I think I'd be willing to let it slide."

Roxas paled, and Axel knew that he soon had to make it clear that there would _not _be any threesomes any time soon, especially since he hadn't even had Roxas to himself yet. "No way!" he said, catching Roxas around the waist and pulling him protectively toward him. "He is _mine, _and I'm not willing to share. Plus. Ew. This is my older kid brother we're talking about!" He made a face.

"Yeah, good going Demyx," said Roxas, tapping his foot, "Not only has all this talk of fucking given Reno a first impression of me that he can tease me about until I die, but has also left me extremely sexually frustrated. I hope you're happy," he finished with a huff, crossing his arms.

Axel's thought process reeled to a screeching halt. Had Roxas just said what Axel _thought _he said? And amongst company? Either he was joking for the sake of being a dick, or he _really _really wanted it. If he'd just said what Axel thought he just said, then, well…why the hell were they still standing there?

He kept his cool though, but tightened his grip around Roxas to show reaction.

"Well, fear not, because we might not even make it out of next week's feisty bloodbath. Can't tease you if I'm dead, can I?" said Reno, grinning. Axel groaned. Reno, though having a very sweet disposition normally, was borderline socially awkward and also had a slightly disturbing indifference to the idea of bloodshed. Indeed, even Zexion and Demyx were edgily inching away as the other parties stood awkwardly, unsure of what to say next.

"Uhh, right, the cafeteria is to the left and then down through the big doors," said Axel, pointing to illustrate. "Leon can get you all settled and whatnot. I'll catch up with you later, okay. Roxy and I gotta get some laundry done before dinner ends and everyone starts fighting over the wash."

Reno snorted. "I know my way around Axel, I've been part of the resistance a lot longer than you. See? Tseng and Elena have already gone in, but whatever, I'd love to get a chance to pick at old Squally again. You two have fun with your 'laundry,' he said, obviously not buying their story. He stalked off with a jovial expression on his face, with Rude following closely at his heels.

"You know, I'm almost tempted to follow them in," Axel confessed. "Do you know how _funny _that would be to watch?"

But Roxas wasn't having any of that. He crossed his arms and tapped his foot, immediately reminding Axel that he meant business. Without any further dillydallying or shillyshallying, he and Roxas were joined by the hand and racing through the hallway like a couple of kids frolicking in a field of daisies. Anxious giggles filled the air, accompanied only by the echoes of their shoes against the metallic floor, and a feeling of nerves and giddiness that spread quickly through Axel's body.

When they reached their room, Roxas shut the door behind them and quickly turned his gaze to Axel. There was a gorgeously unmistakable glint in his eyes, something that told Axel that the blonde was thinking about doing very, _very _naughty things to him.

"I hope you know that I've got absolutely _no _intentions of doing any laundry tonight," said Roxas mischievously.

Axel, feigning innocence, looked down at him with wide eyes. "You mean you _tricked _me? All so you could bring me up here and have your evil way with me?"

Roxas snorted. "If I recall correctly, coming here was _your _idea. But essentially, yeah, I'd say there's a pretty good chance I did."

"Um… are you healthy enough?" Axel blurted, totally ruining all of their fun teasing and playful banter. It had been about a week and a half since Roxas woke up, and Axel wasn't sure what the blonde's recovery time was supposed to be. Organ failure was no walk in the park after all, even with all of Merlin's awesome healing cells.

"Merlin said I'll be fine, as long as I don't go around losing morbid amounts of blood again," said Roxas, scowling. "I hardly see how it matters, since we're all going to be dead in a week's time anyway."

The ghost of a smirk that had been lingering on Axel's face vanished on the spot. He stood silently, staring with intense eyes down at his Pull.

"Axel, I didn't mean that," said Roxas quickly, obviously ashamed of himself for suggesting such a thing.

"…"

"Axel?"

"So what, was all this just to squeeze in a bit of fun before we kick the bucket," Axel spat. "Is that all this is?"

Roxas looked stricken. "No! Axe, please don't think like that! I really am sorry, I don't know why I said that. That—I mean—yeah it's been on my mind, I guess, and I'm really scared we aren't going to come out alive. But don't misunderstand, that's not why I wanted this, I swear! Honestly, I wasn't even _thinking _about it until you brought up my health," he gushed defensively. "Seriously, the mood kinda just struck me, and I've been looking for an excuse to jump you since like, Christmas—"

Axel, though not quite ready to forgive Roxas entirely just yet, interrupted him. "Shh, stop. Stop, I get it!" After finally Roxas did stop, he continued, "Look, I understand. Yes, you were just in the mood to fuck. I got that, but I'm still not thrilled about you talking like that."

Roxas looked crestfallen, and soon had broken down all of Axel's prickliness and the redhead gave in. He sighed, beckoning for Roxas to come sit on their bed with him. "Listen… that week that you were out, I was in agony," he said. "And I'm not prepared to face anything like that ever again. They were seriously considering putting me on suicide watch for a while. And I never _ever _want to make _you _go through that. I _need _to know that you haven't given up hope. I need to know that when you go out on that battlefield, that you go in with the intention of _winning. _Or at the very least, giving everything you possibly can to _keep breathing. _Call me selfish but I need you to live. And I need to know that you aren't going to go out and half ass it because your think the battle's already lost."

"…I totally killed the mood, didn't I?"

"Yes, you did," said Axel impatiently. "That's not the point. Answer the question."

"_How _is that even a question?!" the blonde cried. "You think I'm ready to just give up and die after all I've been through?! All _we've _been through?! Cause you're fucking wrong. I'm not about the let a bunch of creeps take everything that's important to me! They've already taken my home, and Naminé. I don't care if they've got us outnumbered, I don't care if all the odds are against us, and I don't care if we end up the last two people alive when the time comes! I'm _never _going to stop fighting for you, because I love you!"

With a mutter of "Jesus fucking Christ," Roxas fell backwards onto the mattress airily, letting out an exasperated sigh. Axel was about to open his mouth to retaliate, but the words fell short as he backpedalled to what Roxas just told him.

"What did you say?" he asked quietly.

"Fuck if I'm gonna repeat all that," said Roxas irritably.

"No no, just the last part," Axel insisted.

He could swear he saw the hint of a smile tugging behind Roxas' lips. "I know you heard me, because I shouted and you always hear every stupid thing I say. I _think _I just said I love you. Eye…" he pointed to his left eye. "Love…" he jabbed himself in the heart. "You." He jabbed Axel in the heart.

"Thought you weren't into the whole goodbye thing," said Axel glumly.

Roxas growled frustratedly and bolted back up into a sitting position. He also grabbed Axel roughly by the chin and forced him to look straight into his eyes. "Hey asshole. Didn't you hear the rest of my fucking rant? I changed my mind. I'm _not _saying it because I'm afraid I'll never have another opportunity to. I'm saying it so you'll know _why _I'm going to make absolutely sure I _will _have more opportunities to. If that even makes any fucking sense."

Not exactly how Axel would have worded it, but he got the gist. He already knew how Roxas felt about him, but hearing it from his own lips made Axel's heart do backflips. It wasn't exactly fluffy or romantic, but that's what made it so Roxas, and also what made him sure that Roxas _did _mean it. The fact that it was so simply there and out of the blue and unrehearsed; that's what made it so real for Axel.

He couldn't help it. He did as best he could to smile around Roxas' constricting fingers. "Shay it ahghain, prleash," he slurred.

Roxas' fingers slacked, no longer anchoring Axel's face in place, but instead holding it gently. He stroked his Pull's cheek a few times before shifting so that he was sitting on his knees and leaning in very close.

"I love you, Axel," he whispered, molding his lips to Axel's with quiet passion. It didn't last very long, but it couldn't have been sweeter.

"I can't tell you how psyched I am to hear you say that," said Axel. He was. He could practically feel his chest expanding as he took in what he'd been waiting to hear for so long. Though he'd never admit it, he hadn't felt so _truly _wanted and cared for in a long, long time. The sheer joy was almost enough to bring his sappy ass to tears. "And in case you haven't figured it out already, I totally love you too. I fell in love with you right when I ran over you with my skateboard. Hell, I was probably a goner before I even hit the road."

"Liar," said Roxas, smirking.

Axel had something to say to that, but the words were lost as he was met with more feverish kissing. Only this time, tongues were quick to escape and become twined with one another. Muffled sighs and heavy panting filled the air quickly as Axel's rational mind began to diminish. His wrists were beginning to hurt, as they were bent so that his palms were on the bed, and he had to support himself _and _Roxas. So he let himself sink down and lie his head against their pillow. Roxas didn't mind; he moved to straddle Axel's waist without even breaking the kiss.

Those tender 'I love you' kisses from before were gone, leaving only raw, lustful desire in their wake. They were glued at the lips and the hips, everything else was free game. Little hands fisted themselves through red hair, whereas bigger hands were ripping and clawing at the buttons on Roxas' shirt, trying desperately to get it open so he could explore underneath.

"Roxas, I _hate _your shirt," he growled. Not only were the buttonholes impossibly small, but his fingers were also trembling from excitement, and probably nerve too, making him feel oddly under experienced. He was far from being a virgin, but come on, this was Roxas.

"Oh, just let me," the blonde replied, letting his hands leave Axel's hair so he could grab either side of his shirt's collar and _yank, _exposing one inch of himself at a time as the buttons tore out. His chest was already glistening from a thin, sheen layer of sweat, and Axel could tell that he was quickly becoming aroused.

He and Roxas had not been quite this intimate since Christmas, and, remembering that Cloud did still exist somewhere, Axel cursed under his breath.

"What?" said Roxas, looking slightly alarmed. Axel kissed him quickly to let him know that everything was still fine.

"The door," he breathed, "We forgot to do the door."

Roxas nodded stiffly and Axel felt the weight leave him, leaving him feeling rather cold. Roxas yanked both of his socks off and stuffed one between the door and its frame, and then, once it was closed again, he locked it for good measure. When he turned around so that Axel could see him again, he was wearing the most alluring little smirk the redhead had ever seen. He held up one finger and pointed it at Axel.

"Stay," he commanded.

Axel gulped and nodded. Roxas' shirt, though open, was still draped loosely around his shoulders, threatening to slide off at any minute. The blonde was more than aware of his predicament, and he started using it to his advantage. Never taking his eyes off Axel, he let the material slide a few inches down his shoulders, before quickly shimmying it back up again. He repeated the movement, the next time showing a little bit more skin, and a bit more, until finally, the accursed thing was gone.

Axel was enthralled by the performance. As much as he wanted to get up and tear the rest of Roxas' clothes off, he couldn't. He found himself put under a trance, mouth agape, with nothing to do but watch as Roxas, with a teasing smirk splayed across his face, began to ease off his belt with nimble fingers. Axel found that his lips were very dry, so quickly he ran his tongue across them.

Roxas tossed the belt with careless ease into the clothes basket. Without it there for support, his jeans were already beginning to skin, exposing a tiny patch of fine, blonde hairs.

And then suddenly, the both froze as voices floated in from outside their door. One belonged to Sora, who was jovially chatting with Riku as they approached their own bedroom. The voices stopped as the footsteps halted in front of Axel and Roxas' door.

The two parties each lingered for a moment, listening, before muffled snickers erupted from the hallway. The footsteps picked up again, but neither Axel nor Roxas moved before they heard Sora and Riku's door shut.

With an almost silent _snap, _the button on Roxas' pants was undone, and Axel snapped his gaze back to the blonde just in time to see them drop to the floor, leaving naught but a pair of checkered black boxer briefs.

But the tease wasn't over yet. Roxas leaned both shoulders against the door, leaving his hips jutted out as he began to finger the waistband on his underwear. Axel groaned and clutched the front of his crotch, which was totally visible under simple lounge pants. The area was much too constricting for his liking, but fuck if he was going to take his eyes off Roxas for even a second.

The blonde seemed to notice the problem though, because he stopped moving completely.

"Axel," he whispered, his eyes darkening two or three shades. "Take your clothes off. All of them. Now."

Axel had half a mind to refuse, just to be a little shit and give Roxas a taste of his own medicine. Unfortunately, his body said otherwise. No clothes = sex faster. _Get rid of clothes. _So he nodded and set his trembling hands to work, thankful that, unlike Roxas, he _had _chosen to dress down that day. When one wore nothing but a tanktop and lounge pants, it took them a lot less time to get undressed then one who wore, say, a fucking button up shirt and tight jeans.

When his pants were gone, he crossed his legs so that his shins formed a little X, hiding the embarrassingly large erection that had already formed. He was amazing to see that just the act of removing his clothes was getting to Roxas as well. He was leaning back against the door again, this time with one arm thrown against the wall as though he were lying down. The other one—Axel licked his lips again—was massaging the front of his boxers, which were notably tented.

When he and Axel caught glances, he stopped, moving once again to lower his underwear one inch at a time, revealing creamy, perfect hipbones that Axel couldn't wait to abuse.

"Damn it Rox, stop with your stupid little strip tease and get over here!" Axel hissed. Roxas smiled seductively, this time showing his teeth, slid the clothing down _just _a bit lower, and then—

_Click._

The bothersome item finally dropped to the floor. Only Axel couldn't _see _it, because his torturous fucking boyfriend turned the lights off! With nothing but the light from under the doors to illuminate the area, all Axel could do was sit around and wait for Roxas to come to him. And come to him Roxas did. Within seconds Axel was knocked backwards by clumsy hands, and there was a sudden weight pressing down on his chest, robbing him of air.

"Knees on my lungs! Knees on my lungs!" Axel choked out.

"Sorry, Roxas mumbled quickly, moving off of Axel and settling on top of his legs. "Put your hands on me," he whispered. "Axel, please. Please touch me."

Axel was vividly and _painfully _aware of Roxas' state of dress. Or rather, undress. He was completely bare, his unclothed erection placed firmly up against Axel's inner thigh. Hands were quick to jump out and anchor themselves onto Roxas' hips, while his lips went to touch the first bit of skid they could find. In this instance, it was the torso.

Everything was messy. Hot breaths mixed into the heavy air, as both sighed out nonsensical words. Saliva became mixed with sweat as Roxas' body shook and trembled under Axel's tongue, reminding Axel that, despite natural skill, the blonde was a virgin.

"You're mine, aren't you?" Axel groaned, sliding his hands up around Roxas' shoulders. "No one has ever marked you… here." His teeth clamped down gently on the hollow of his lover's throat, his lips closing over the spot and sucking harshly. When the spot was sufficiently reddened, he dragged his tongue down until he met a raised nipple. "No one has ever teased you… here."

His tongue flicked out to lap at the spot, forcing a shiver of anticipation out of Roxas. He seemed in no danger of stopping his breathy moans, that beautiful, soft ones that screamed 'oh god, yes, give me more!' They made Axel's skin tingle oh so pleasantly.

"Axel," Roxas breathed, making the redhead's nether regions twitch. "Please…" he begged.

"Mm," was Axel's response. Lower and lower he went, ravishing whatever skin happened to glide under his mouth. Roxas' hands threaded through his hair again, massaging and sometimes pulling gently.

Axel spent the most time at the blonde's hips, the ones he'd been so eagerly admiring some time ago. The bones that jutted out made the most perfect little grooves of sensitive skin for him to sink his teeth into.

"Nobody has ever kissed you…here," he whispered, placing a few tiny kisses over the skin. Gradually he started licking too, and then incorporating so much tongue and teeth that it felt more like he was making out with Roxas' hip. Which was all fine, what with Roxas being so responsive. He had his marked throat exposed to the heavens, whilst crying out softly with his hands still buried in Axel's hair. The skin was so hot, salty, and delectable, Axel was having almost as good a time as Roxas. He ended up leaving a few marks here as well, looking forward to seeing the damage tomorrow when they were done.

Roxas whined as Axel began moving away from his hips, trailing tiny little kisses down his thighs. His tongue dipped into the inside of Roxas' knee, which caused a surprisingly loud reaction. They had to shift a little to make it word, but soon Axel was feeling up places he'd never before considered to be erogenous. Knees, shins, thighs, all at the mercy of his fingertips.

"No one's ever loved you here," he stated, pressing his nose affectionately against Roxas' shin. It was smooth. "Did you shave your legs?"

"Mm," Roxas groaned. Damn, that was so hot. Axel was sure that this was not what the blonde had in mind when he asked Axel to touch him, but he sure seemed to be loving it. Axel wanted to _know, _and to feel every inch of his Pull's body. He wanted to _know _that nibbling on that spot under the knee made Roxas shiver and trap a moan between his teeth. He wanted to _know _that Roxas liked having his waist fondled infinitely more than his backside. He wanted to _memorize _his Pull, every little niche and crevice.

But Roxas was getting impatient. He leaned forward and caught the loose skin under Axel's ear between his teeth, giving it a needy little tug. The painful and pleasant sensations shot straight from his ear and to his groin, drawing out a lengthy groan from deep inside him. It was like a flash of burning heat, a new edge to an already dangerously burning flame.

And then, out of nowhere, a million pictures scrolled through his mind, as though he'd taken a step outside his body and was viewing the scenes from another person's point of view. The first image was just of a simple kiss between the two of them, but then they progressed. In the next, he had a full view of their nude bodies, pressed up against one another. Then, it because continuous, like an old, choppy film.

An old, choppy porno.

Now, in his time at _Poir, _Axel had never starred in any pornographic films or magazines (thank the lord) but he'd always figure that if he had been, that it was sure as fuck _not _be this damn arousing to watch it of himself.

"A-are you doing that?" he stuttered dumbly.

"Depends…" Roxas replied, the smirk evident in his voice even though Axel couldn't see it on his face. The film changed to a closeup of Roxas' face, twisted up in such a way that he could only be ready to climax, or was already experiencing it. Fuck, it was beautiful. "Is it working?"

"Fuck you, _yes _it's working," Axel growled, "You're getting me all off-track! Where was I again?"

"Something about being the first person to love my legs?" Roxas suggested, sending Axel a mental image of what it would look like if they screwed from behind.

Finally remembering what he was going to need for his next step, Axel swore.

Roxas paused. "What's up?"

"Lube, Rox, we need lube!" he growled frustratedly, knocking his head up against the headboard. Christ, how could he have forgotten?

"Wait here," Roxas instructed, untangling himself from Axel and disappearing from sight, silhouette and all. "Don't go anywhere, I'll be right back."

Suddenly light was streaming into the room as Roxas opened Sora and Riku's door from the bathroom without even bothering to knock. He had modestly hidden most of himself off to the side of the door frame, leaving only a few parts exposed.

"_Holy shit! Way to knock, Roxas! What do you want?" _came Riku's startled yell.

"_Is that a hickey on your __**ankle?**__" _Sora's intrigued voice followed.

"Yes, Sora. I need lube. I _know _you assholes keep lube in here, because we can hear you going at it in here all the time, and Cloud likes to make fun of you. I solemnly swear that I will replace the entire damn bottle if you want me to, but I need lube _pronto._"

Laughter followed, but behind that, Axel could hear a drawer being opened and a bottle being thrown.

"Cheers," Roxas muttered.

"_Have fun now,_" Riku's voice sounded as the door swung closed behind him.

Roxas could be heard feeling his way around until he ended up back under Axel where he belonged. "Here you go," he said, pushing the bottle into Axel's hand. "I found lube. Let's go."

"How do you know where that's _been?"_ Axel asked, now that he was able to think with a slightly clearer head.

"Jesus, Axel, it's not like it has a nozzle you can stick anywhere!" Roxas cried, clearly impatient and annoyed. "I got you your damn lube, so are we gonna do this all the way or what?"

"You're gonna be mighty happy I made you get that in about three seconds," Axel warned, deciding last minute to go in for a sneak attack.

"What are y—WOOOOOAAAH THERE!" Roxas yelped, squirming and twisting uncomfortably around Axel's finger, which had oh so inconspicuously wormed its way into Roxas' opening, ninja style. "You know, I'm betting that half the pain people always associate with this has to do with fucking _digging claws!_"

Axel made an apologetic face that he knew Roxas couldn't see and pushed his finger more to the inside so that the nail was as far away from his Pull's flesh as possible. "Remind me to to clip my nails next time, then," he muttered dryly, searching around for that telltale little bundle of nerves. "Hmm, that's right, I remember where I was going," he continued slyly, "No one's ever touched you here, have they?"

Under struggled breaths, the blonde uttered, "_Ohfuckdamnhnng—_none that I can recall, but if you count a rectal thermometer when I was a baby, yes."

"So no, then," Axel said brightly, _Ha ha! _He thought, pressing down on his newfound plaything.

Roxas' reaction was priceless. He made a noise that sounded like a cross between a strangled hiss and a whine, and his body seemed like it was conflicted between jolting away and rolling down for more. The result was a funky spasm that left him not really doing either of them efficiently, but Axel was pleased nonetheless.

"Okay, so if anybody else _had _touched you there, they never did _that, _right?" Axel asked, not once losing his suave and friendly tone of voice.

"N-no…" the blonde admitted. "Damn it, where was horny Axel from about five minutes ago? I'd like him back if you please, he was a lot more fun than you."

"Fuck you, get him back yourself," Axel challenged, swirling the digit around one last time before adding a second.

Then all of a sudden, there were no more fingers. Well, there were; Axel could still feel them in their proper place, but the front of his mind wasn't focused on that anymore. Roxas was projecting more images to him, so strong they were this time that they seemed almost real. As real, at the very least, as Zexion's illustrations; and because the room was so dark, all he could see was what Roxas was telling him he could see.

This was also different from Zexion in the sense that now, the pictures were associated with feelings too. Imaginary, physical feelings. Except they couldn't have been imaginary. They couldn't, because they were still affecting Axel.

"I'm about to," Roxas replied, the satisfaction ringing clear in his voice.

Then it was Christmas morning. The light was back on, and they were sitting cross-legged on the floor, staring at one another, challenging, yet tender at the same time. Roxas' fingers were wrapped delicately yet deliberately around his length. That memory was real, so in that sense, it affected Axel even more than the pictures. His own memories supplemented in the little details Roxas hadn't imagined for him. He could remember _exactly _how those fingers felt.

They were in Axel's apartment building, the one he'd once shared with Demyx. Bright white daylight streamed in, whiter still from the sun's reflection off the newly fallen snow. Axel was sitting on the ratty, worn old couch across from the TV set—he was surprised Roxas remembered the details of the place so vividly. Or maybe he didn't; maybe he was just recalling Axel's memories. But those things weren't what was important anyway. What was important was that his legs were spread far apart, and Roxas was in between them. More particularly, Roxas' face was in between them. He was kneeling front and center, his mouth hovering right over Axel's member, which was conveniently already out and ready to go.

The blonde's head lowered a few inches, all it needed to, and Axel—the real Axel—tensed up, moving nothing but his fingers. It felt so _accurate._

"How…the hell?" he gasped out loud, unable to finish his original sentence: _How the hell do you know __**exactly **__what a perfect blowjob feels like?_

"Hayner gave me one once," Roxas admitted. It was strange to hear his unmuffled voice whilst perfectly clearly seeing his mouth closed over a dick at the same time. "I was sort of just working off of that."

Curiosity satiated, Axel banished thoughts of anything but himself being with his Roxas and just enjoyed being sucked off. He knew it wasn't real, since he could feel his real penis pressed up against..what was that, Roxas' thigh? His hip? Something like that. Regardless, the effects it had on Axel _were _real. His skin broke out in a sweat, his heart was racing marathons, and damn it he was hard enough to explode.

When Roxas began deep throating him, a loud moan escaped hi real body and he added a third finger.

The next scene, Roxas had to reach into Axel's own memories for—partially. Only for the physical bits, not the visual. They were doing it, _it _it, sitting up, a lap dance from the front, on a spinny chair. Silent amber light surrounded them, accompanied by the distinct smell of fixer and sex.

Axel's only remaining reminder of his body in the real world were his fingers, still even moving. The closer he drew to orgasm, the faster and more sporadically he stroked them. He was that Roxas was used to the feeling of being penetrated by now, because he didn't think he could control himself anymore if he wanted to.

The rest of him was focused solely on the living fantasy. He was pumping in and out of Roxas at a paced perfectly matched with the pleasure he was feeling. And there was a limit to it, and that was coming very quickly.

"R-Roxas, stop!" he pleaded, with which voice, he wasn't sure. "You're gonna make me come!"

But Roxas didn't stop. Nope, not even by a fraction. He wasn't even _entertaining _the idea of stopping.

"Ohh! Oh _yes!_" Roxas' mental projection screamed. "_Yes, _Axel OH! Right there! Oh, Axel, don't stop! Ungh! Right there!"

Axel was jolting his fingers into Roxas' prostate at a maddening pace, hoping that as long as he was going to finish ahead of schedule, Roxas wouldn't be far behind. Finally, it just became too much, and the scene changed right at that precise moment.

For the duration of the orgasm, Axel was standing with Roxas on the deck of his old vacation home, pine needles stuck to the bottoms of his feet and everything. He and Roxas were just laughing, hugging, and kissing. Axel wasn't sure if even Roxas knew how to get into a place that deep in his mind. That picture was, in its simplest sense, a visual manifestation of perfect happiness, personalized just for Axel. It was a moment of true serenity.

Then suddenly, it all blanked out, and Axel was thrown back completely into reality, a reality here he could feel his own, warm semen dribbling down his leg. And they hadn't even actually made love yet. "What happened?" he wondered aloud.

"What d'you think happened? I just _came, _dumbass," said Roxas' voice, hoarse from all the screaming it turned out he had been doing after all. "_You _try keeping up a mental projection after getting your prostate _abused _like that!"

"You… you just _thought _me to orgasm," Axel laughed, astounded. "I can't believe you just thought me to orgasm."

"Yeah well, get your damn fingers out of me and yourself in me. You know we aren't finished yet."

Indeed, just thinking about thirty seconds ago got Axel hard again. Despite his innocence and inexperience, Roxas really, _really _knew how to put on a damn good show.

"Fuck yeah, let's do this shit for _real!" _said Axel enthusiastically, finding himself full to the brim with excited energy, having not actually exerted himself to get all the perks of a climax. He paused though, and whispered to Roxas, "Are you ready? This is still gonna hurt more than the fingers."

Roxas replied sarcastically, "After a manhandling like that? Please. Really, please… I am ready. Do it."

Soft lips found Axel's, and wet kissing sounds filled the air as Axel did as he was told. The projection had been good, _really _good, but there was nothing that could compare to taking his love for the first time. As he slid deeper in, Roxas let out a breathy groan, but not uncomfortably. It was most similar to a sound of relief, and contentment. Axel wished they were in the light, so that he could observe Roxas' face.

"Okay?" he asked.

"Super," said Roxas. "Seriously, you can go whenever. It doesn't hurt."

"I love you," said Axel simply.

Roxas didn't even hesitate with his reply. "I know. I love you more."

"We'll have that argument later," Axel decided neutrally, figuring it was high time to quit talking and start fucking.

Roxas had been right. Axel wasn't me with any resistance during the initial penetration, but that didn't mean that the incomprehensible virgin tightness was anything short of unreal. Roxas wasn't the first virgin he'd taken, but nobody else had ever _fit _quite so perfectly.

When he moved, it was slow and precise. After the fast-paced action they gotten back there, he was in the mood for a slow fuck.

Roxas made a sort of throat-clearing noise, but it certainly didn't sound like one of pain, so Axel figured it was okay to _really _go, like not just experimentally rocking forwards to test the waters. As soon as he made the decision, Roxas' ankles crossed over his back and he wondered briefly whether their minds were still connected. He hadn't heard anything from Roxas, unless his outloud voice had actually been his mental one the whole time.

_I'm here. Go. _

And so Axel went. And he took his own sweet time and went nice and slow. Every move was precise and deliberate, all of which Roxas seemed to _quite _enjoy. He wound his arms around Axel's neck in a way that strongly reminded him of a Koala bear, his head simply rolling back and forth limply with every move.

Axel immersed himself completely into the sounds of his Pull's breath, the way he smelled, the salty tinge the skin on his neck carried, the way his skin raised goosebumps with every touch, even though to Axel he felt searingly hot.

"Deeper…" Roxas whispered.

Without warning, Axel rolled them over so that Roxas was on top now. It sort of came instinctually to him, since that's how he used to do it with Demyx. When Roxas let out a little yelp of surprise, Axel remembered only then that this was just their first time.

"Sorry," he murmured, "Shoulda warned you."

Roxas didn't seem to mind being on top, though, in fact he was rather excellent about it. While Axel wasn't making him do _all _the work, he still had the majority of control and he seemed to prefer it that way. He ground down fiercely and while he didn't have much of a technique, as to be expected, Axel didn't think it was possible for him to _not _enjoy it.

The weight on his shoulders shifted, and Axel felt lips on his chin, looking for his mouth, presumably. It was slightly awkward, but they found each other relatively quickly. Mouths and tongues slid together without rhyme or reason. Warm bodies pressed together, minds blank, heads spinning.

Intimacy with Roxas of this level was, to say the least, exhilarating. To be one with his Pull, both physically and emotionally was more than Axel had ever hoped for. If he had a mind at the moment, it would have been overwhelmed with sheer joy.

But he had no mind at the moment, he was too busy getting the shit fucked out of him. While usually he prided himself on almost always being dominant, there was no question that Roxas had full control this time. Axel was the one writhing, toes curling, crying out softly and going slightly crazy.

The pace picked up even further still, they were both getting close. The rhythm was beginning to waver slightly, but it hardly even mattered. He felt Roxas' euphoria in his mind, and he knew Roxas could feel his. This, he thought, is how _all _sex should be, all the time.

When the orgasm came, it came _hard. _Like, leave scratchy finger marks, arch your back, roll your eyes back hard. The time between when it started and when it ended was almost a total blank to Axel, but at some point, Roxas had finished to and had at some point also rolled off of him and back onto the bed.

The next few moments were spent in silence, save for the catching of the breath. It wasn't until Roxas made an adorable, tired little "Mm" sound and snuggled up next to Axel that either of them said anything.

"I feel like, so much better," Roxas admitted which made Axel feel so much better. After all, he'd never want to hurt his Pull or pressure him into anything.

"Not too sore?" Axel asked teasingly.

"Not yet," Roxas assured him. "Can't speak for tomorrow, though…"

They both laughed quietly together. It was a beautiful sound, because even though he couldn't see him in the darkness, it made Axel feel good to know that Roxas was smiling again, instead of forming premature frown lines and spending all of his time worried and afraid.

"Think we should clean up?" Roxas asked passively.

"Probably."

After a lazy stripping of sheets from the bed and a quick round two in the shower, the couple stumbled into bed, ready for a well-earned sleep. Axel was about ready to fall asleep when Roxas uttered a tiny, "Hey Axel?"

"Mm."

"D'you think that when this is all over, Reno will go back to Midgar?"

In truth, Axel hadn't really considered hat Reno would do. Just seeing his brother today came as a complete surprise. He thought about it perspectively. If _he _were forced to spend several years away from his home, wouldn't he want to go back?

"Axel?"

"I'm thinking about it," he replied.

He supposed that, when this was over, that personally, he'd want to go wherever Roxas went. Reno did have an entire team that he was part of, but would any of that even be _necessary _after this? It was all down to what Rude wanted. Perhaps he had family in Midgar, a whole family. Maybe he wanted to enlist and help settle the civil war. Axel, if given the choice, knew that he didn't really want to go back and live in Hollow Bastion. It wouldn't be home anymore.

"My guess is that he'll go where Rude goes," said Axel, "It's kind of funny. I talk about missing him all the time, but I don't really know his life anymore. Why do you ask?"

Roxas started to say something, but then he paused. "N-nothing," he stammered. "Just trying to think about where _my _brother will want to go."

"What you mean, back to Twilight Town?" said Axel, "Or here with Leon?"

"Yeah…" Roxas replied, trying to stifle a yawn.

Axel chuckled and pulled the blanket (they'd salvaged a clean one from the vacant top bunk of the other bed) and spread it over them. The clean fabric felt warm and cozy on his water chilled skin, and he was getting sleepier and sleepier by the second.

He didn't know who fell asleep first, but after so long of sleep deprivation, sinking into peaceful, dreamless sleep felt _nice._

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><p><strong>AN: This is, by far, the longest lemon I have ever written, ever. Do you know how long this took? It took the whole **_**summer, **_**cause writing smut is such a challenge**_**. **_**You better appreciate this.**

***See what I did there? :3**


	24. Calm Before the Storm

**SHE LIVES! I can't believe it's been *does a quick check* WHAT!? FIVE MONTHS!? Five whole fucking months since I've updated. I really don't know what happened. Nanowrimo beat the shit out of me, I guess. I… really can't even believe this fuckery. I think I'm madder at myself than you guys probably are. I hope this chapter redeems me a little bit.**

* * *

><p>"I'll—I'll give you two a moment…"<p>

It was the day of the bonding ceremony. Aqua, Terra and Ventus all waited together in the same tent for Vanille to announce she was properly decorated and ready to start. Aqua looked heartstoppingly radiant in her midnight blue gown, and Terra was clad in matching robs. Even Ventus, all decked out in white, was dressed to impress.

The men nodded their thanks to Aqua and she left the tent, giving them one last opportunity to be… whatever it is they thought they were being.

Roxas was, once again, aware of himself, having not been on the verge of death anymore. Although… at this point he was really starting to wish he could stop getting pulled into this. Right now it wasn't so bad. Terra and Ventus were just hugging. Yet everything about Terra screamed _'not Axel!' _He was more muscle-y than he was skinny, and he smelled different, and he held Ventus differently.

Then came the kissing. Ewwwwwwwwwwe kissing. Terra's mouth was harsh and rough and did not taste _anything _like Axel. He tasted like the smell of Earth after a good rain. And it wasn't like, totally _bad, _per say, it just _wasn't Axel. _He was _kissing _another _dude_ and _it wasn't fucking Axel. EW. _

And what was worse is that Ven _liked _it. He really really fucking liked it. Adrenaline and endorphins were all over that shit, and he was literally buzzing with happiness and excitement, even with the wedding looming over their heads. The enthusiasm made Roxas feel so _dirty, _because he was forced to feel it as well. Ventus' hands would their way up around Terra's neck, and Terra's hands kept firmly in place around Ventus' hips. There was no escaping for Roxas anytime soon, and he wondered miserably why he had to view this particular patch of Ven's memories.

It went on like that for a few minutes, but thankfully Aqua came back in and saved the day. She's seen them in their embrace, but surprisingly she didn't seem very perturbed. If nothing else she looked as unhappy as they did.

"I'm really sorry," she said, her regular drone even more melancholy than usual, "But Vanille is ready. It's time…"

"Right," said Terra. He turned to Ventus one last time. "No matter what happens, I love you."

"I love you…" Ven whispered back. _Ugh, _Roxas thought. How ridiculously and uncharacteristically sappy of him. It was like watching a crappy sitcom.

The ceremonial hall was made of the same crystalline material seen up around the rising falls. Roxas knew that most of the Earth around and underneath Hollow Bastion was like that, but seeing it in such great amounts was startling nonetheless. Terra in Aqua, blue as could be, fit right in; whereas Ventus and Vanille stood out something terrible. Well, terrible for Ventus. Vanille looked right at home in the center of attention, and of course, all eyes were on her.

As the only person out of the four who did not have ceremonial warrior plates, Vanille, by popular opinion, looked the most beautiful. Even though her silky, floor length gown was an unconventional shade of the brightest white, it complemented her frame beautifully. Gorgeous white lilies adorned her hair, which even in its formal updo hung down in untamable spirals.

But Ventus didn't want to look at her. He didn't want to marry her. Even Roxas felt sympathy for his previous carnation. Though he loved Vanille to pieces just for being Axel, he imagined Ventus' feelings for Terra to be somewhat like his own feelings for Naminé, before they began to dwindle. He remembered how horrible he felt when fate first began pulling him towards Axel.

He tuned out most of the ceremony. The vows were of different tradition than the modern ones, as these had no Christian lineage, but the concept remained the same. Ventus and Vanille held hands, or forearms, as the case may have, as were Aqua and Terra on the other side of the altar. Roxas thought it a bit odd that they had group weddings, and wondered absently whether this was a rushed circumstance because of the war, or if all of the village's bonding ceremonies took place as such.

Roxas wasn't paying attention much at all until a cool, tangy something was pushed between his lips. It tasted very sweet but citrusy at the same time. The priest, or whatever he was called, was leading the entire hall into some weird chant and sprinkling powder over the couples. As weirded out as he was, there wasn't anything Roxas could do about it so he just let Ventus chew on the fruit. Just as he was deciding he rather enjoyed the flavor of whatever it is that he was eating, Ventus shut down.

Not by the literal sense of the word, of course, but mentally, he was gone. Roxas didn't have to block out his thoughts anymore; there weren't any there. Looking out of unseeing eyes, Roxas saw that Vanille stared back, the same mindless expression plastered on her face.

It was over as soon as it came on. Barely thirty seconds had passed before Roxas was overwhelmed by a feeling of sheer joy. _Ventus' _joy. He could hardly even think for himself over everything going on with his other.

Of course everything was okay. He was with Vanille, why wouldn't it be? What reason did he have not to be happy? He couldn't even remember why he'd been dreading this so much. How could he not have been looking forward to spending the rest of his life with Vanille? Beautiful, sweet, sweet Vanille, with her perfect glowing skin and wild red hair. Her charming personality was suddenly so drawing to him.

Tears were running down his cheeks; Roxas wondered who they belonged to. Before now, he hadn't fully comprehended the Pull. Even though he'd experienced its effects and even been hurt by them, nothing could have prepared him for this. All those feelings for Terra, every bit of them, the happiness, the sadness, the confusion, the _love, _was all just _gone. _Roxas was at least lucky enough to retain the love and emotions he had towards Naminé, even if they were dulled by those for Axel. Ventus didn't get anything. He was wiped clean like a slate. Even _if _Axel was the best thing that'd ever happened to him, even if he chose to believe what they had _was _real… he wouldn't wish this fate upon anyone.

Roxas took the tears as those of pain and anger, Ventus took them as those of happiness and love. He kissed Vanille blissfully and fully, the girl so much like Axel that Roxas had to succumb to her, if only briefly. People cheered for the newlywed couples, and the tense, gloomy atmosphere was gone. Terra and Aqua looked just as happy together, _were _just as happy together.

The only thing that could possibly get Ventus down was the idea of dying so shortly after he'd been united with his love.

~o~

Morning on the eve of the new moon was not like the eve of the full moon. This wasn't just the possibility of losing a few friends; it was the possibility of losing _everything. _And as such, people seemed to be making the most out of their last few hours. Nobody seemed discouraged from making chitchat with one another, at least. The last of the foreigners had arrived: an elderly man who called himself Master Yen Sid, and two other men.

Each of them had black hair, but that seemed to be their only similarity. One introduced himself as Zack, with a tone much too lively to suit that of warfare, and introduced the other as well. Vincent, he said, was his half-brother.

Zack, as Roxas surmised, was a pretty cheerful fellow. He told them outright he represented a very special class of the military called SOLDIER, though he refused to disclose his nationality. He and Vincent both had pale skin, though Vincent kept his face so shrouded under cloth and hair, it was impossible to see much at all aside from a pair of disturbingly crimson eyes. Zack's eyes were blue. He reminded Roxas a little bit of Xion.

Nobody seemed at all fazed at the idea of war, and even Roxas was feeling pretty numb. He felt as though he should be more afraid, but he just could summon the enthusiasm. He laughed dryly when Zack cracked his jokes. He smiled back when Joshua smiled at him. He joined the food fight Kefka gleefully started, though the fun was cut short of Xaldin came storming in from the depths of the kitchen to start a heated brawl with the aforementioned clown.

It was like Roxas had spent so much time worrying about the last mission, that this one didn't even seem worth it anymore. Well, it was obviously worth _doing, _but not worth the stress. After already having thought before that he himself was dead, that _Axel _was dead, or dying, after all the physical and emotional pain he'd been put through, this was just another chip in the pile.

After breakfast, almost everyone went to the elements room to practice. It was undecided when exactly the little army would depart for the Great Maw, as Sephiroth wasn't particular about the date. But there were men out and watching, and since the coming night was the new moon, it was assumed that tonight, they would go to battle.

Needless to say, everyone was limbering up as much as possible. After a dual healing session from both Merlin and Master Yen Sid, Roxas felt as though he could run marathons. He sparred with almost everybody, honing his skills against all different fighting styles and arsenals. He knew all the right pressure points to compromise the human body, and he used that information to fight mercilessly, losing only once in a while to Sora, because Sora had so many more years' experience with the Keyblade.

Roxas had been told that his skills had heightened considerably, and also inexplicably. His style reflected neither Sora's nor Leon's, and they were the only instructors he'd ever had. While he couldn't understand his sudden shift in technique either, Roxas did take full advantage of it. Many people who were used to sparring with him (Axel, Riku, etc.) had to learn to fight him from scratch.

During down time he'd taken to hanging around the ex-Nobodies, particularly the Riku doppelganger, as was the case after practice. They were confined to, rather unfittingly, the sanctuary, and while they were no longer chained in place, they were not yet permitted to roam about the castle without a chaperone.

Since making their acquaintance, Roxas learned that the brothers merited a visitor, and so did Vexen, oddly enough. The brothers got Riku, who was the most versed in their behavioral patterns, while Vexen got Lexaeus. It was a good thing, Roxas thought, even if it was strange, because while Loz and Yazoo didn't seem to mind being locked up, Vexen got very restless.

"Do you regret coming here with us?" Roxas asked for maybe the third time that week. Vexen always had different answers, so Roxas would keep asking until the iceman got fed up with the question.

While Vexen's lips went blue at the question, he shook his head calmly. "Saïx wormed his way to the top. He had Superior wrapped around his slimy fingers, and I got sick of it," he snapped. "And yet, I don't claim to know what possessed me to join my enemy. I still cannot comprehend it. I've subjected myself to a life away from my research, a life without life. But…" he said after a pause, "It would seem that even in this dismal place, I have found myself a companion."

Just as the man finished speaking, Lexaeus strode in without a word. He sat on the pew across from Roxas, closest to where Vexen paced. He said nothing but allowed Roxas a silent nod. Roxas nodded back, finding it rather odd to see him alone, as opposed to in the company of his brother. Although Roxas had seen Zexion without Lexaeus, seeing them vice versa was a rare sight indeed. Lexaeus never went anywhere alone.

Well…maybe he wasn't alone. Although neither man said a word, Vexen had stopped pacing and they were making unwavering eye contact. Roxas wasn't sure, but he got the feeling that they were having an entire conversation without needing to say anything. Vexen's head twitched occasionally and now and then Lexaeus nodded with his eyes.

Roxas stood up quietly, getting the feeling that he was no longer welcome. He muttered an almost indistinct 'see you' and left, giving the three silverettes each a small nod of acknowledgement as well on the way out.

He didn't know where to go. There were plenty of places he _could _go, of course, but none drew his appeal. If he went back to the training room, he would just get dozens of pairs of eyes on him. Which was to be expected, obviously, but he didn't want to encourage anyone to regard him as a hero. He wasn't a hero. Heroes were brave, and strong, and… not bloody fags.

Going to the pool would almost certainly merit a visit from Demyx, which Roxas would also rather avoid. There wasn't any residual tension between the two, or anything of that sort, but Roxas wasn't quite in the mood to face the sandy man's perpetual optimism. No, today he wanted to be alone. He didn't even want to see Axel at the moment.

His feet carried him numbly; he let them go wherever they fancied until he found himself facing the stairwell which led to floor three. Floor three… now there was somewhere people weren't likely to venture. There wasn't anything up there but storage and DiZ's office, and if DiZ marked a place as his turf, people generally avoided it. But Roxas doubted DiZ spent his time wandering around in the equivalent to an attic, so he decided to risk it.

Storage looked less like a room and more like a warehouse. Roxas had never seen so much useless _shit _piled in one place. It was like everyone in the world cleared out their basement and threw all of their strangest junk into one big compilation. Everything from holiday decorations, to vintage clothing, to records, to an old pong machine lingered, and that was only at the mouth of the cave. As he pressed further into the labyrinth, the objects started becoming stranger. Things like mannequins, cages, and parts of old automobiles poked out, and even what Roxas suspected could be an early-industrial gummi ship.

He took a seat on a pretty wrought iron bench and let his head in his hands. He needed some time to think. Axel had taken a nap not too long ago, so Roxas knew he had a bit of time before he would be missed. As he looked further, Roxas' gaze landed on a familiar pair of eyes. A short pang jolted his innards as the recognition dawned on him.

"Hullo Shadow," he said dully as the little black kitten slinked out of her hiding hole to greet her master. He'd almost forgotten he had her. As she jumped into his lap and snuggled into the warmth, Roxas wondered what would happen if he did what she did. What if he decided to just… slip away, and disappear into the maze?

What would he find, he wondered, if he reappeared in a week's time?

"Not thinking of running away, are you?"

Roxas' heart jumped out of his chest as he fell off his seat with a startled cry. Perched in what might have been a prototype cockpit at one time was a second unexpected visitor; DiZ. Despite having his private time on the top of a column of junk rudely interrupted, DiZ sat unfazed, idly sucking on an ice cream bar and regarding Roxas with thorough amusement.

"DiZ!" Roxas exclaimed breathlessly, scrambling to collect himself, or stand up, or do anything to make himself a bit more presentable to such an intimidating leader. He didn't succeed much, all he managed to do was piss off his cat. "W-what are you doing here?! With all due respect!" he added quickly.

DiZ chuckled shortly and waved off Roxas' formality. "Like you, I've taken to wandering through these halls when I need to think. I've come to find that relics of the past…they make much better food for thought than the trials of the present. And eugh, between you and I, they make much better company."

"Umm…" Roxas said blandly. He didn't know what there was to be said without making an idiot of himself.

"You never did answer my question," DiZ pointed out, idly plucking the strings of an old cello. He didn't look like he was very angry or judgmental, but Roxas got the feeling that DiZ could read his mind.

Roxas cleared his throat. "D-do you have the cells too?" he asked timidly, which in a very polite, roundabout way was the same as asking whether his mind was being read or not.

"If I did, I would not use them on you, my dear boy," the old man replied with a weak smile. "but I get the feeling that I'm not wrong in my assumption?"

"I'm not running anywhere!" Roxas retorted hotly.

"Please, child, relax. You misunderstand," DiZ replied calmly. "I do not mean to accuse you of cowardice; I have complete and utter faith in you. There isn't a doubt in my mind that you can and will do as you say you will. What I mean to say is, you _are _doubting yourself, no? Some second guessing, I'd imagine?"

Roxas sunk back down onto his bench. "Yes…" he admitted. "I was considering just… disappearing. But I'd never do it."

"I understand," said DiZ thoughtfully. "You know, I knew a very nice young gentleman once. His spirit was as free as they came, a trait I believe is passed down from father to son," he chuckled to himself. "Anyhow, he used to tell me that life was too short to play the hero. But in the end, when danger came, he sacrificed his own life to save countless others."

"DiZ…?" said Roxas uncertainly.

"Ansem."

"Beg pardon?"

"I think you can just call me'Ansem' now," said DiZ. "My name is Ansem."

"O-oh," Roxas stuttered, feeling honored. "Ansem?"

"Yes Roxas?"

"What was _his_ name?"

"I believe it was Eric," said Ansem, slurping the last of the ice cream off his stick. "Eric Sinclair."

Roxas missed a beat. "Sir…?"

"Hm?"

"Where are you going with this?"

Ansem sighed. "My apologies. Tangents of an old man. I mean to say that I believe bravery will find us, even in the worst of times. In fact, I believe that our own bravery comes to us _especially _during the worst of times."

"I'm not so sure…" said Roxas uncertainly. "I don't want to run away. I don't intend to run away. But what if my body just, I don't know, picks me up without my consent and flies away?"

The old man hummed in thought. "I don't think that will happen. Generally when one's Pull is involved, life and death is not really the top of one's priorities anymore."

Roxas turned red at the ears. "Let's just hope I can get this done before one of us dies, then. Unless I go into some kind of trauma induced rage, losing Axel…" he cringed and shuddered at the thought. "Losing Axel will not bode well for us. I would break."

"I don't doubt it," said Ansem. "Is it is any consolation to us, it will only be a matter of time before you see one another again."

"But not in this life," Roxas remarked. "And I don't know if I'd see this one through if that happened."

Ansem opened his mouth to reply, but was startled greatly by a loud, shrill ringing. It echoed bodingly through the labyrinth, rattling old bits of metal and warping around things lost in time. Roxas had never heard the sound before, but he knew very well what it was. The emergency alarm.

It was time.

~o~

The castle was in chaos as all of the King's Men scrambled to get properly equipped and armed. The armory wasn't a foreign place to Roxas, but he'd never seen it like this. Babble of every nationality filled the air as people rushed to collect either they're own personalized weapons, or one of the many that this branch had to offer.

It the midst of the pandemonium, Roxas could be seen walking through slowly, numb to the world, and to all the nods and words of encouragement from his companions. His heart rate was normal, his breathing was normal. Everything just felt… empty.

His armor was waiting for him at the far side of the room. Unlike the underarmor he'd worn to infiltrate the enemy base, these plates were external. He would be covered, from his helmet to his boot, giving the appearance of a hard, shining exoskeleton. He suited up in silence, uttering not a word under Axel appeared in similar attire, chakrams in hand. The look really didn't become him.

"Hey Roxas," said the redhead solemnly.

"Hey Axel," Roxas replied in the same tone.

"Where've you been all morning?" Axel asked, almost indifferently. He didn't look as self-assured as Roxas did; he looked nervous like he was supposed to be. He spun his weapons anxiously and paced back and forth.

Roxas shrugged. "Here and there," he said noncommittally. "I went exploring. What'd you do?"

"Talked to Kairi," Axel said, helping Roxas set the shoulder plates. "She's not holding up very well. Says she'd rather fight than hold us while we die."

"That's a morbid way to think," Roxas replied, "But probably true. I think it'd be worse to become a dusk, though. Is there any way to restore a person that's been lost, do you think? All this time, I've been thinking of them like… I don't know, aluminum wrapped corpses. D'you think maybe whoever they were are still inside?"

"Doubt it," Axel said darkly. "Riku'd probably know."

They sat in an uncomfortable silence, each trying dully to follow the chaotic scramble with their eyes, to no avail. When Roxas finished doing all the clasps on his boots, he leaned up against Axel to join him in his people watching. It would have been cute, were Axel's body plates not hard, sharp, and clanking distractedly against his own.

Eventually Zack and Vincent appeared in the crowd, sauntering over to join them. The two looked perfectly at ease, despite not being quite as heavily clad as Axel and Roxas. Zack at least had shoulder and chest plates, but it was impossible to tell what Vincent was wearing under his weathered red cloak.

"Hey guys," said Zack cheerfully, as though they were not about to march off to war and possible slaughter. "Feeling okay?"

"Not feeling much at all," Roxas responded honestly. "Physically I think I'm all right, though."

Zack waved him aside. "I felt like that before my first battle too. After a couple of wars, you learn to make it more like a game."

"A _couple _of wars? How old are you?" asked Axel incredulously.

"Twenty-nine in a week," said Zack. "Say, speaking of which, how old's your brother, Roxas? Is he single?"

Roxas snorted. "I think he's twenty-seven, but no, he's not single," he nudged his head over to where Leon was putting on the same gear he'd been wearing the day Hollow Bastion was attacked. Zack let out a barkish laugh.

"They do seem meant for each other, don't they?" he twittered. "It's just as well, I wouldn't be able to bring him home with me anyway. The climate would probably kill him."

"Where the heck are you from?" Roxas blurted. "Yeah, I know, you don't want to give stuff away, but I mean come on, if _I _were out to betray the resistance, I'm pretty sure you'd be screwed whether you told me anything or not."

Zack and Vincent exchanged amused looks. "It's not that we think you're out to betray anyone," Vincent explained. "Quite the contrary, we all trust you. Nevertheless, word has a way of traveling, intentional or not."

"Ah, lighten up Vinny," said Zack, earning a disturbingly fierce glare from Vincent. "We're from Nibelheim."

Axel blinked. "Nibelheim? As in, _the _Nibelheim? I thought Midgar nuked that entire planet during the Mako war."

"And I thought the Olympians planted landmines underneath Hollow Bastion last decade," Zack countered. "You see why we couldn't tell you? We're trying to stay under the radar long enough to at least rebuild. We're at a truce with Midgar right now. After they backed off, the rate of invasion's dropped considerably, but we still have to fight people off every five years or so."

"Wow…" said Roxas, "Just dealing with this one battle is getting to me. I can't imagine being at war all the time. I feel bad enough about having _one _target."

"Me and Vincent make a game out of it to make it more bearable," Zack said with a grimace. "If our orders are to capture, the guy with the lowest body count wins. If orders are to kill, the guy with the highest body count wins… we try to do it painlessly."

Roxas felt like he might be sick. Breakfast had been churning through his stomach all morning, now it was threatening to come up. "Does it ever… bother you?" he asked, "Do you ever think about all those people?"

"I try not to," Zack admitted. "After the first night, I didn't sleep for a week. But whether I kill for my country or not, that isn't my choice. How I feel about it is. So I try to think of it like this: every life I take is another one saved. I've killed a lot of good, decent honest men who were only following orders, like me. But at least I know that I'm fighting to protect, rather than to take."

"You talk too much," Vincent scoffed, folding his arms. "Zack got drafted. I enrolled. I sleep at night knowing his ass would be dead without me."

"So you say, so you say," Zack sang. "He's a teleporter, see. It's handy for getting out of tight spots. Anyway, to answer your question, I guess it does get to me occasionally, but I like to think we're good guys. At least we're not like Clowny over there," he added darkly, pointing to Kefka. "Zanarkand is full of monsters. Heard they _like _killing over there. And Kefka's _definitely _gone round the bend."

"Be glad he's on your side, then," Vincent snapped.

The two brothers disregarded Axel and Roxas after that, too busy with their own quarrel to pay any heed. That was fine with Roxas, in fact he'd even summoned the enthusiasm to smile at how childish they could behave in the face of war. The argument was short lived, however, because a moment later Ansem emerged, with his mask on again. He was as battle-clad as the rest of them, holding a gun blade similar to Leon's.

Silence passed over everyone as Ansem paced the length of the room. When he reached Roxas' end, he stood to the side and turned around so that all could give him their attention.

"In a few moments, we will meet the Nobodies in battle once again," he began, "The Bastonian government has been informed of the situation, but I'm afraid they will be of no help to us. I don't know for sure, but they certainly gave me the impression that our bloody _fool _of a leader has gone into hiding."

He paused to shake his head at himself as if to calm down. "Needless to say, this leaves us at a disadvantage. Without the law to back us up, it is down to you and I. Now, their numbers are small, by my count, only five or six humans still live within the organization. But, couple them with ten thousand dusks, and we become highly outnumbered, even with the U.S. troops at our disposal.

I want to thank each and every one of you for your courage, and for your services. I am proud to have been given the privilege of working alongside you. I wish you all the best of luck, and when everything is said and done, I hope to see you again at the end of the day."

Even after Ansem finished his speech, the silence buzzed awkwardly in the air. Nobody was really sure what to do. Applauding seemed silly, and since none of the underlings had anything to say, most people just looked at their feet. A few of the women were crying; even Zack and Vincent looked on edge. For certain, nobody was at ease anymore.

"We will be crossing into the real world momentarily," said Ansem. "Please follow me when you are ready."

~o~

It never snowed in Twilight Town. The only mass of land occupied by people was resting partially on the planet's equator. The lowest recorded temperature on land was twenty-four degrees, and because of which, school had been closed for weeks while the technicians figured out how to fix the power outages.

When Roxas stepped out of the remains of _Poir, _it was twenty-three degrees outside. Aside from the narrow path of footprints leading from the building to the road, the virgin snow laid untouched from the last storm. Some of it was uneven from the layering of one snowfall after the other, but in some rare spots, a few wiry blades of grass had fought their way through the blanket of white.

Because there really wasn't any other suitable way to transport everyone to the Great Maw, they would be walking.

The gauntlets Roxas wore didn't allow him to intertwine his fingers with Axel's, so they held hands the normal way. As they passed a certain tree, fond memories flooded Roxas' mind from a time that seemed years ago. In reality, it had only been a few short months since the trees were ablaze with fiery color, since the driveway had been littered with crumbling auburn leaves and discarded pine needles. When they passed the tree, Roxas felt a warm pressure on his hand. Axel must have remembered too.

"What are you thinking about?" Roxas blurted.

"…our first kiss," Axel admitted after a moment's hesitation. "Do you remember it?"

"Ha, which one?" Roxas muttered sarcastically. "The one where you attacked me in the photobooth, the one where you attacked me in the dark room, or the one on that tree?" he asked, pointing to the one in question.

"You do remember!" Axel twittered merrily. "I was thinking about all three."

"It was so _awkward, _though!" Roxas groaned, briefly touching his clawlike hand to his face. "You could have communicated a little better, you know."

Axel made a _pfft _noise. "Yeah well, you aren't exactly innocent yourself," he said, "I seem to recall Nam—"

He stopped dead, but it was too late. It was out. He peeked warily at Roxas to try and gauge his reaction. Naminé often was still a pretty touchy subject.

Roxas wasn't sure how he felt. The hurt had never really _stopped, _but it nothing else it had dulled a little bit. It was like the chip off the metal monopoly piece Roxas had stepped on when he was four. Sometimes even to that day, if he walked on it wrong, a flash of pain would shoot through the arch of his foot. On other days, it didn't bother him at all.

Of course, Naminé meant a lot more to him than some childhood accident, but at least the time had come where a day might go by and he hadn't thought of her, hadn't lain awake to grieve. He _did _think of her, most days, how could he not? But sometimes he allowed himself to forget, and that is a somewhat encouraging thought.

"It's fine," Roxas assured him. "It doesn't matter now, right? What's done is done. Besides, this is all for her. For closure."

"Hmm. Maybe getting Saïx will bring me some closure too," said Axel. "I don't fancy the idea of killing another human, but I'm certainly not going to hold back when he comes after me. And part of me hopes he comes after me."

"Don't be so keen to do anything on your own," said Roxas. "Saïx has his friends. You're going to need some too. I'd help you out myself but… well, you know…"

"Yeah," Axel agreed.

They walked in silence for a couple of minutes, and then when they reached the end of the driveway and began to approach the city, Axel pulled Roxas aside and kissed him. It was slightly awkward, because of their headgear, but the message was the same. Roxas' legs were shaking and his mouth was dry and Axel's mouth was dry and they were a little off balance. But Roxas needed this. They both did.

"Axel, we have to go," said Roxas as his Pull began fingering through his hair and hiding his face in Roxas' chain mail.

"No…" Axel moaned, sounding like a child refusing to get up for school.

"But we have to…" Roxas replied reasonably. He wasn't moving either, though. "I think they'd notice if we went missing, Axe."

Ten seconds or so passed, and Axel finally dropped his arms and said, "Yeah, okay."

It seemed as though the others were following their example, anyway. Zexion and Demyx stood together a few yards away, holding and whispering to each other. Joshua and Neku were walking slowly with their heads pressed together. Even Leon and Cloud were holding hands, which was the most apparent display of affection they'd shown since Christmas. Sora was all but sobbing into Kairi's boobs, but Riku didn't seem to mind.

Cid's aircraft could be seen zooming by overhead, and the party began moving again.

As they moved through the outer city, more common people began following them. The group earned stares of confusion from citizens of all kind; those oblivious to the danger. Roxas ignored the eyes on him, both from his comrades and otherwise, until a pair of tiny young girls approached him.

One of them, despite being only eleven or twelve years old, wore a haggard, sullen expression that reflected premature age. Her face was still young, but she no longer had a child's eyes. The other one still looked like a little girl. She was much younger, and there was still a certain radiance about her.

"I found my sissy!" squeaked the little one happily. She clung to Axel's leg, halting them in their tracks. That's when it occurred to Roxas that she was the same child Axel happened across at the restoration site. Her two front teeth were missing, so her S's sounded like Th's.

"I see that," he said kindly, trying to return her enthusiasm.

The older girl turned her gaze to Roxas. "Where are you going?" she asked, "People keep saying that we're being invaded again…"

"Something like that," said Roxas. "We're on our way to take care of it."

He started walking again, catching eyes with Axel, who had hoisted up the little one so he could move again as well.

"Is there gonna be another war?" the little one asked.

Roxas didn't know how to answer. Did this count as a war? By general definition, wars tending to last a while, years even. But this conflict all hinged on one battle. It wasn't the start of a new war, so much as the end of an old one. "Listen, take your sister and go into the woods," said Roxas, pointing them in the right direction, "and take as many people as you can. There's a big, burned down house in there. Find it, and stay near it. But don't go inside unless you need to and make sure you stay away from the road. If you have to, you can use some of the wood to make a fire."

"But there's monsters in the woods!" she cried in fright as Axel set her down.

Roxas got on his knee so that he was level with her. "I _promise _that there aren't any monsters in there. The worst you'll see are some foxes, okay? Make sure you take lots of grownups with you. As many as you can find."

"How long should we stay for?" the older one asked, grasping her sister's hand.

"When you see us again, you'll know," Roxas promised.

Most of the party was some twenty feet ahead now, only Cloud and Leon stayed behind to survey the scene from a distance.

"We have to go now," said Roxas, "hold down the fort until we come back, okay?"

They both smiled, and said 'okay' in unision.

It took them some time to catch up. When they did, Leon and Cloud matched their step. "Did you know them?" the brunet asked.

Roxas shook his head. "No. They just wanted to know what was happening. I told them to hang out in the woods near _Poir _until it's over. At least that way, if things take a turn for the worse, they could use if as a shelter or as firewood."

Leon looked perfectly ruffled at the idea of his renowned _Poir _becoming firewood, but before he could voice his opinion, he stopped dead at the sight that unfolded.

"Whoa…" he said in awe.

"Whoa" was right. At last, they'd approached the Great Maw of Hollow Bastion. The bastion from which the city was named stood high, despite its state of decrepitude. The valley looked more like a grassless, sunken plain than a maw.

The company hung back, unseen, allowing Loz, Yazoo, and the copy of Riku to go ahead and meet with the organization. In the far distance, Roxas could see what was left of them emerging from inside the crumpled temple. Still clad in black, they were clearly still overconfident, despite having lost almost their entire—for all intents and purposes—royal family.

Kadaj was leading, the other three members flanking him. They also had two others with them: Roxas recognized neither, but the power and strength rippling from the group told him that Xemnas was among them. Both strangers had their faces hidden, making it impossible for Roxas to do anything but guess for the time being. He swallowed, although his mouth was really too dry for it to do anything, as he watched the scene play out.

~o~

My name is Riku. At least, that's the name my creators gave me. I look like Riku. I sound like Riku. I am Riku, down to the last freckle on my shoulder. But all the memories I have are those artificially given to me. I remember growing up, but I lack the scar from when Riku was pushed down the stairs by Yazoo. I lack the burn from when Riku accidently electrocuted himself wiring the security system.

I am not Riku.

I don't even have the privilege of being my own person. They ask me what I want them to call me, but I can't think of any other name to be called. I have over two decades' worth of memories of being called Riku, even though I am only a few months old.

I've been told the truth about what I am, and it's been proven. The other Riku has the scars. The other Riku has friends, a family. He has Sora. Sora, whom I find myself so inexplicably drawn to. Many times have I dreamt of going to him, claiming to be the real thing. Sometimes I even find myself fantasizing killing the real one to take Sora for myself.

I envy him so much for being real, while I, a miserable puppet, could never be considered anything more than a freak that looks like him. But I cannot bring myself to hate him for it, and so cannot bring myself to kill him for it. With no name, no home, and nothing to live for, I can only think of one thing to do: Destroy my creators.

Despite having perhaps the largest hand in my creation, Vexen had treated me the best by far. He took care of me, while the others sneered in my face. From what the memories tell me, he was twice the father to me that Sephiroth was to Riku. Regardless, even if I'd wanted to kill him, the real Riku has forbidden me from doing so. How pathetic I am, becoming a slave to myself.

I don't know where I will go or what I will do when this is over. But I am certain that the only way for me to find true liberation is to end those who made me in the first place.

My brothers and I are marching together, and I can see Kadaj. I'm not supposed to kill him, but I will. Even if they hate me for it. I'll kill them all. I'd kill Loz and Yazoo right now if they weren't helping me. They are low priority. I'll get them later.

Kadaj doesn't see our army yet. He thinks we're here of our own accord. He's smiling at us, and his arms are spread wide as though welcoming us into a hug. What a fool he is.

Xigbar and Luxord aren't so sure. I can see them exchanging looks; silently considering the possibilities. I can feel Lexaeus moving underground, ready to spring up if given the order. Saïx is in the back, protecting Xemnas, and so is my lab mate.

Vanitas.

I hadn't expected him to be here. Actually, I'd really all but forgotten about him what with everything that's happened. Vanitas was the only companion I'd had when Vexen wasn't around. He knew what it was like to be a replica before I did. Unlike me, he was created without a conscience, but once I got him to quit talking about his "one true purpose," getting along with him was rather easy. I wish I could talk to him now. I doubt he'll go after me on his own, but I fear he won't have any qualms against killing me if he's ordered to.

Though his mask covered his face, I could see that it was turned towards me, looking at me, wondering whether I was me or not. I gave him a pleasant nod, as though we were meeting to play cards. I tried not to look too apologetic. I wish I didn't have to make him my enemy.

Our parties were close enough to speak now.

"Brothers!" Kadaj cheered jubilantly. "Are you ready to come home with us, and take back what is ours?"

"Yes," I said shortly, tasting the lie like sweet candy on my tongue. "Forgive us, brother. We had lost ourselves."

Now we were close enough to touch. Come on Loz, I urged, just like we planned. I gripped my blade tightly, ready to draw it and use it in a moment's notice.

"I'm so sorry, brother, we don't want to hurt you," Loz apologized, just before walloping Kadaj over the head, knocking him out.

I was the first to react. Before the others could so much as blink, I had my blade out and was spearing my "brother" like a fish. It was a strange sensation, feeling one's life underneath your fingertips. He really was so easy to skewer. I felt the point driving into him, ripping through flesh, blood, and muscle. How easily were his vital organs compromised.

Barely a half second passed, and I was shouting, "The other two! Quickly!"

But my actions had thrown them off guard. They're just standing there, dumbfounded. Fine, let them die. I can handle these assholes myself.

I whip myself around, bringing my sword with me, ready to cut my closest target, whether they be friend or foe. I caught glimpse of Luxord, and I'd picked my next victim. The poor stupid bastard, he's not even saying anything. He's just standing there, with that confident, smug ass grin he never takes off. I would take pleasure in watching it vanish.

Vanish

Nish

Ish

Ish

Sh…

I don't know what happened, or how it happened. But I'm stuck now, I feel hot metal tearing through the flesh in my neck. When had Xigbar come between Luxord and I? When had my brothers fallen to the ground. I'm just frozen in midair. I can't move, I can hardly think in sequence. Everything is wrong. I want to scream out, partially in pain and partially in frustration. I can't move my hand to stop the blood flow, and by now I've realized that Xigbar's bullet has torn through my jugular.

In another instant, I was let go and dropped to the ground, and my concept of time restored. My palm is pressed as hard as it can be to my wound, but the blood's flowing too fast. I know my life is going to end. Well, that's not entirely true. I'd never lived my own life in the first place. I was going to go back to where I belonged.

Riku's childhood is flashing before my eyes, now. But I can only laugh at the irony. I was made to replace Riku, and now I'm being destroyed, because they think I am Riku. It's as fitting an end as any, for someone like me.

My false skin is disappearing again, and my enemies have realized their mistake. Xigbar is going bug eyed, trying to figure out a way to save me. I am a valuable asset, after all, and very expensive. But I know it's too late. I'm laughing as hard as my dying body will allow. I'm a little pissed that I couldn't even succeed in punishing my creators, but I guess I'll just have to rely on the real Riku to finish my work. A faithful replica until the end.

Blood is filling my lungs. I'm not afraid, but my body is reacting as such. I had to scoff at what the body did in such situations. My heart was pounding, which really wasn't helping with the blood loss. My lungs craved more oxygen, which would only add to the hemorrhaging. The earthshaker is coming up down, I can feel the ground collapsing around me. I can't—

~o~

Roxas watched in horror as the dying replica was drawn into the earth, unable to save himself. They said they weren't going to kill Kadaj, but Riku'd just… _impaled _him without a second thought.

He'd never seen Luxord's powers in action before. But when Riku'd been lifted into the air, frozen completely, Roxas could only assume that it was the result of Xigbar and Luxord's powers combined—a perfect demonstration of time and space.

Loz and Yazoo were down, but not dead. Kadaj hadn't even known what hit him. Roxas wondered if he'd even felt any pain, or if it just ended the moment Loz hit him. As Lexaeus rose up from under the ground, the remaining organization members backed into their sea of dusks, leaving the dead and dying to sink into the earth below.

"_Now!" _DiZ thundered. "Quickly, before we lose them!"

Weapons drawn and fury high, the company charged down the hill, DiZ at the head. Roxas, Axel, Leon and Cloud lead the rest. From there, everyone broke off into tiny groups, and Roxas was left alone. He caught a swish of black between rows and rows of silver, and he went after it.

Struggling to keep his enemy in sight Roxas sped closer and closer toward the army of souls. He'd have to break through the ranks, dive headfirst into them. Keyblades drawn into a protective X around his body, Roxas charged into the group. Cold metallic flesh struck every bit of him, stinging his already bitten, frozen skin.

Once within the ranks, he'd lost sight of his enemy. So, reluctantly, he turned to face the lost souls closing in around him.

Roxas was lethal. He could clear a six foot radius of living dusks in twenty seconds. He used both blades flawlessly and effortlessly, his only hindrance being his guilt. He was soon joined by Zack, DiZ and Kefka. Zack was mesmerizing to watch. He had such strength, and he moved like nature itself.

But Roxas didn't have time to watch. Unbeknownst to him, a dusk crept up on him, ready to cut him from behind. It was struck down by Kefka, who was giggling madly. "I won't save you again, Twinkle Toes!" he called gleefully, incinerating about eight dusks at once with a single bit of materia.

Once again, Roxas caught a flash of black in the corner of his eye. Realizing that the only way he could get to it was by fighting his way through, Roxas raised his weapons with renewed vigor.

* * *

><p><strong>We're almost there, guys. Almost to the end. Just a bit more...<strong>


	25. L'Oscurita Dell'Ignoto

This is the end, everyone.

Okay, so because I'm a pretty narcissistic and overly dramatic person, I put together a sort of playlist for this chapter. The first song is "Dominant" by Emilie Autumn, and you can listen to that at your leisure. It can go pretty much anywhere in this chapter. If you type it on youtube, it's the first one that comes up. The second one is a completely and wonderfully epic version of the Other Promise, which, unless you actually bought it, can only be viewed here - www .youtube watch ?v=sNaVMcKLfJA&feature= I recommend starting that one at "And then he remembered…"

The song happened to come on my itunes when I was typing that part and, shit the feels. I had to take a break. So yeah, I'm a little ridiculous. You can do that if you want. Moving on.

Okay, here we go! This is the part where I personally thank every single one of you little Flames that reviewed for me. Thank you to:** P5hng-Me-AW'y, WillCosplayForFood, ReliveTheGreat, CoconutMigration, becca670, BornxThroughxSleep, lovelyhellfire, duchess. farfie, AnimositysDaughter, XionAmmy, xXxAxelxRoxasxXx, Takara Yume, Radiant Waterfalls, Tennciel, Lalebis, Clover-x-Charm, Coenum, Riku's my dark prince, StrangeSisters, loveisover, destructivedoll, Madriddler, satori02, Axel Puppy, blood as soft as silk, mikepd, KatzeSchnee, AnElegantCatastrophe, I. Love. Lollipops., Sayonara7, Axel-Got it Memorized, Tierra the Awesome, RainbowNinjaD, Lazy. Elegance, StevieUnderground, Silver-Haired-Theif, bitterbeauty813, Lele-the-Greek-Geek, Tabbi-18, twilighttimefan, KuroChaos01, Eletigalo, Arcadian Rapture, Ewonsama, and midnight. raven. 15. **I LOVE EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU FOREVER.

* * *

><p>"Easy Demyx… Just remember what we planned," said Zexion. Regardless of entering the battle in the back row, Demyx was clearly struggling with any sort of offensive strategy. But a group of dusks was heading towards them fast, and the pressure was high.<p>

"O-okay," said Demyx quickly. Despite his shaking, he managed to rise up a thick enough cloud of fog to buy Zexion the time he needed to do his part. The dusks were, essentially, disoriented. At least, as disoriented as a dusk could get. It was easy to hear them clanging into each other. But they still hunted by scent, and as such, they were still relatively organized on their approach. That's where Zexion came in.

It took him a while to muster up enough energy to do it, but he did in the end render every single dusk useless. He blanked their senses completely. As of that moment, no dusk within 50 feet of them could see, hear, or smell. And that time, there was a panic. They flailed amongst themselves frantically, knocking into each other and trampling over one another. They even began attacking one another in search of the source.

But that wasn't the end of Zexion's attack. He conjured up one, tiny little ball of light in the darkness. One of course, that only the dusks could see. The effect was immediate. They all stopped dead in their tracks and were tripping over themselves trying to reach the light.

They charged as one giant group—right over the cliff.

Demyx laughed and jumped up and down triumphantly, ready to move on to the next group.

~o~

"Be ready, gents, I'm takin' 'er down!" Cid shouted over the roar of his aircraft's engine.

He pulled his ship down on the southernmost end of the maw, the end that none of the other King's Men had reached just yet. The dusks, however, seemed endless.

"We're ready!" Aladdin called, getting into position to face the wind, Xaldin standing beside him.

"Steady she goes," Cid murmured, preparing to open the hull.

Xaldin managed to steady most of the gusts that blasted through the hull, but the sound was still deafening. Clutching onto either a railing or each other, the two men performed their dual attack, sweeping close to four hundred dusks clean out of the field. They'd be back, in twenty minutes maybe, but the point of the attack was to buy time, and buy time it did.

~o~

"Get out of here!" Neku called angrily, slashing clean through the nearest dusk with an attack pin. "I don't need you here!"

A blast of heat sounded behind him, though he didn't hear it over his headphones. It was the heat that caused him to whip around and see a team of dusks preparing to attack him from behind. At least, they had been. Currently they were being reduced to an odd mix of molten metal and boiled skin. Joshua hovered above, throwing a high intensity flame from a Class A materia pin attached to his chest.

"Of course you do," said Joshua serenely, lowering himself gracefully to the ground. "At least as much as I need you."

In a sweeping motion Neku lifted three dusks into the air at once, and Joshua, in turn, sent a beam of electricity through them. As it turned out, dusks were excellent conductors of electricity. Set one off, and lovely bright blue arcs could travel through as many as twelve.

Neku's lip quirked irritably, but he at least allowed his Pull to indulge in a fist pound. As much as he hated being wrong, it was clear that without using one another for help, neither of them were going to get very far.

~o~

"Lemme up! Lemme up! Get your hands off me, you stupid fucking geezer! I can still fight!" Phil bellowed, struggling against the medical crew trying effortlessly to restrain him.

"Your ankle is _shattered, _Phil!" Kairi insisted. "If you don't sit down willingly, I will _make _you sit down and that might hurt you. Don't make me sedate you."

Still grumbling, Phil finally began to move towards one of the smelly, lumpy stretch cots. It was early yet, but there were already four American soldiers in the tent, three of them unconscious and apparently missing limbs. The last one was being examined by Jasmine for head trauma.

"How about you come over here and see me, doll? I betcha I'm a lot more fun than the Yank over there," Phil suggested.

Jasmine, though showing no signs of accepting his invitation, giggled softly. "Just be patient. They're getting ready to come take care of you."

"I don't _need _taking care of, goddammit!" he roared. "Don't you get it!? I should be out _there!" _

"And do what, be a useless hindrance to everyone around you!?" Jasmine snapped, for the first time taking on a very harsh, angry tone. "You're nothing but deadweight now! So stay put and let us fix you up! You've done what you can, but now you're just going to have to sit back and do anything you can over _here!"_

She stormed away, and Phil realized that as a princess, she'd been forced to stay behind against her will, too. He looked around, ashamed of himself. Neither of the older men were looking at him, but Kairi was observing quietly, albeit disdainfully.

"Put me by the window, please," Phil asked quietly.

~o~

Axel was alone. He'd been alone since the battle first started when he and Roxas had been separated. He hadn't seen anyone, friend or foe, aside from those in the endless collection of dusks. After several long minutes of just fighting, fighting, fighting, Axel was beginning to tire and finding it harder and harder to believe that there _was _a finite number of dusks on the field.

It must have been an hour before he saw it. A flash of black in a flood of silver. It distracted him enough to be knocked over, but the low-ranking dusk that had done it didn't even put a dent in his armor. He sent a wall of fire between the dusks, going in the direction in which he saw the black, and they parted like the red sea for him.

Between the dancing columns of red, orange and yellow, one splash of blue drew his vision from everything else. By the devilish smirk on his permanently marred face, it became perfectly clear to Axel that Saïx was _intending _to be found by Axel, and by Axel alone.

"Hello, Knuckles," he sneered. "Come to beg for your life?"

"I'm giving you one chance, Saïx!" Axel bellowed. The dusks might have just been foot soldiers, but the humans, the Nobodies, they were to be considered generals. And those of the resistance were expected to show compassion. "Surrender to us, and we can work things out peacefully. You won't be harmed. But if you refuse to retreat, I _will _kill you, and that is a promise. Look around you! I don't see any moon. You're useless!"

Saïx bared his teeth. "I hope you got a chance to say goodbye to your precious Pull," he snarled, raising his claymore to a battling position. "Prepare to say hello to your precious parents."

And then they sprang. Axel closed off the area in flames so that Saïx had nowhere to run or hide. The blunette ran towards him, his mutilated face twisted in fury as he raised the claymore over his head in preparation to strike. Axel zeroed in on the opening and he took it. He threw one of his chakrams at the exposed midsection area, which Saïx dodged and let it come zooming back.

Cursing, Axel caught the weapon and used the two of them as shields as Saïx brought his weapon crashing down. One of the blades on it cut Axel's pinky, but he took little notice of it. His knuckles were already bruised and bloodied from the battles and Axel certainly wasn't going to let something so trivial as a pinky slow him down.

He shoved Saïx off, reminding himself that he wasn't sparring anymore. Dirty, cheap hits were allowed, and the rules of a fair fight were gone. He was fighting to kill.

Spinning the chakrams between his fingers, Axel ignited them and sent them both flying into Saïx. Throwing both could be a risky move, since it left him virtually defenseless, but it also doubled his chances of getting a hit. And one of them _did _hit. It cut shallowly through the side of Saïx's gut; he could see the blood spurting out. It also burned. The black fabric melted and became fused to Saïx's flesh. He yelled out harshly but shortly in pain, and he swung at Axel before he could get his wheels back. It cut deeply into his thigh, and it hit a nerve. Axel sunk to the ground.

"How easy your family was to kill," said Saïx, his voice betraying none of the pain he was feeling, if the bastard could feel at all. "Your parents didn't even know what hit him, but your _brother," _he tsked. "Why, he went down so easily. All I had to do was knock out his Pull, and he practically killed _himself. _You're weak. All of you. So weak. What have you to live for now?

"When you're dead, I'll welcome death with open arms!" Axel shouted. If what Saïx said was true, and Reno was gone too, Axel was _pissed. _Hardened with a new thirst for revenge, not a cell in Axel's body stood in favor of showing mercy. A slow, painful death he deserved, and a slow, painful death he would get. "Goodbye."

He snapped his fingers and a giant, blue white flame erupted from the ground, engulfing Saïx in flames. He screamed and screamed and flailed viciously as the flesh melted off his face. Axel sat and watched from the ground, a hard, unchanging expression on his face. If anything was getting to him, it was the smell. But nothing to worry about. When Saïx became ash, the stench would pass.

When Saïx lay unmoving, only then did Axel lift his hand and withdraw the flames. What he left behind was a lumpy mass of black, atop which lie a featureless, lumpy face composed of nothing but blackened muscle, veins, and bubbled, boiled skin. It was nothing like how they showed it in the movies, looking like burning was the equivalent of skinning. They didn't understand that bits of skin would still be there, didn't show that burned flesh could still bleed. Teeth lined what was left of the jaw, blackened and almost reduced to dust.

At last Axel tore his eyes from the remains and covered his leg wound with his palm. It was bleeding. A _lot. _The cut went through all the layers of his skin, and even the fat layer was exposed. He didn't know much about anatomy, but Axel knew enough to realize that when a wound was that deep, he could die. He would have to step out, at least for a little while, to get his leg bound. He just hoped that Kairi would let him out to fight again.

Keeping the protective ring of fire around him, Axel limped away, leaving Saïx to be buried among the rest of the lost souls.

~o~

Closer to the center of the army, where Xemnas was, the dusks began to get more powerful. Some carried weapons, some were _made _of weapons. Some could burrow into the ground and ambush from below or even detonate. Some had mechanical wings, and some few were even artificially infused with Jenova cells, aside from the fundamental cell-based core they were made with.

So far, only Cloud had broken through the lower ranking wave of dusks, and he and Leon had lost each other somewhere along the way. It didn't affect Cloud in battle. His Jenova cells were so powerful, he could take down most dusks in only a few hits. The newer dusks, of course, were not so easy to kill, but they still weren't much of a match for Cloud. He swung his colossal sword effortlessly, crunching metal beneath it.

Now there was this one dusk, right, and it was majorly pimped out. It carried six giant lances to be thrown like javelins, and, unbeknownst to Cloud, it would self-destruct on high impact. So, like any good soldier, when his eyes landed on it, he went after it immediately. His buster sword went through all the dusks surrounding it, and though he had to do quite a bit of maneuvering to avoid the lances, he managed to land a deadly blow.

It landed on the ground, and where its "eyes" had been before, the holes were instead emitting a blinking red glow. It hadn't shattered into thousands of pieces and that had Cloud concerned.

Zack knew better. He was well-versed in every class of dusk, and he knew that any second, it would explode. It had its javelin pointed right at Cloud. Vincent saw it too. He shook his head warningly at Zack, but Zack promptly ignored it.

"I'm going in! Bring us out!" he called, already sprinting towards the spikey blonde.

"Cloud! Run!" he shouted, waving his arms like a lunatic. Cloud looked, and Zack could tell he'd immediately figured out what was happening. His eyes went wide, and he began sprinting towards Zack as Zack was him. When they were in close enough vicinity of one another, Vincent's red cloak surrounded them. Or at least, that's how it looked to any normal human being.

As a teleporter, Vincent had to be in many places at once to retrieve any number of other people. The span of his cloak allowed him to pull them into the vortex in much less time than it would take otherwise. This technique had saved Zack's life dozens if not hundreds of times. They whipped away and out of sight, staying just long enough to see the dusk explode and the spears fly everywhere.

The process of moving from one spot to another was much like travelling from Hollow Bastion into the World That Never Was. That was Cloud's first impression, anyway. He couldn't breathe, as though someone had compressed his lungs by means of a very tight corset. Like somebody was shoving him feet first through a wringer. When his feet hit the hard ground, he was in no way prepared. His knees jerked the wrong way slightly, and as a result he crumpled into a heap onto the earth, concerned with nothing more than filling his lungs and clearing his fuzzy, oxygen deprived head.

Vincent had taken them to an area that had already been cleared of dusks, courtesy of Demyx and Zexion. Cloud, however, had no way of knowing that, and being all alone on the edge of a cliff was very confusing and frightening to him.

Zack was not so lucky as to get away with confusion and fear as his only ailments. Out of the four lances the dusk still had on it when it self-destructed, two of them managed to wriggle between Vincent's defenses and hitch a ride into the vortex. They clattered to the ground the second they finished materializing, but it didn't matter. They'd already done their damage.

Vincent had passed out, seemingly. At least, he was on the ground and not moving, but he was breathing and showed no signs of external damage. Cloud took that to be a good sign. His heart plummeted when he spotted Zack, who was also on the ground.

Cloud had never been squeamish about anything in his whole life, but when he saw what had happened to his new companion, his blood ran cold, his palms started shaking, and he thought he might barf up his entire stomach.

Zack lay on the ground, his chest rising and falling rapidly. One of his temples looked like they'd been slashed with a knife—there the spear only grazed him. Blood poured out the wound and down the side of his face, but in reality, it wasn't nearly as bad as it looked. Not bad enough to draw any attention to it anyway. No, not when there was a _gaping hole _in his chest, the javelin having gone clean through it. It wasn't even poking out. It had actually gone _through _his chest and out the other side.

As if this were not bad enough, Zack was still conscious. His eyes, which Cloud noticed were precisely the same blue as his own, were wide open and looking all around for someone, or something, that could help. When they fell on Cloud, he closed them briefly, turning them back towards the sky.

"I-it hurts to breathe," he coughed.

Cloud, realizing immediately the urgency of the situation, forced his head to stop spinning long enough to crawl over and get a better look. It was hard to see anything past the pool of deep crimson that'd spread over Zack's chest and onto the ground.

"Then don't talk," Cloud urged. Without thinking, he applied as much pressure to the wound as he could. "What do I do? How do I fix it?"

To his shock and horror, Zack smiled at him. "Can't. Lungs'll start—" a shallow cough, "—fillin up any second. You're gonna… gonna… live. For both of us. My honor… my dreams… they're yours now. S'the least you can do for me—"

"How can you say that?!" Cloud choked, shaking uncontrollably, "When it's all my-my fault?"

With an impressive show of dying strength, Zack hooked his arm around Cloud's neck. It may have been that he was trying to pull him down to whisper in his ear, but simply didn't have the precision. The result was Cloud's forehead falling limply against his chest.

"_Not _your fault… _not… _was my choice…" Zack muttered. His eyes were impossibly wide open now, as though keeping them from closing would keep him from dying.

"How are you so okay with this?" Cloud demanded, lifting his head up but not bothering to try and clean the blood off his face and hair.

Zack smiled again. "Easy. I know I picked the right person… to be… my living legacy."

And then he died. Just like that. It didn't help that he was holding his eyes open; his consciousness just melted away whether he was on board with it or not. He stopped blinking. He stopped breathing. His heart stopped beating.

Cloud was panicking. He'd never actually seen someone die before. He'd lost people, sure, and he might have slain Sephiroth like an animal, but that was basically what Sephiroth was anyway. He'd never been forced to literally watch the light leave somebody's eyes as he'd watched the life leave Zack's. He couldn't come to grips with it.

With an angry and frustrated scream, he began to cry. And then he began to fruitlessly yell for help. But nobody was coming, nobody was even within eyesight, not with all this fog. His heart sped up, and his body began acting on autopilot. He hyperventilated until he made himself dizzier than he already was. The smell of blood filled his nose, his eyes clouded up. Was he dying? The thought only made him panic more. He was _dying, _when Zack had just entrusted him with his own life. He was dying, and nobody was coming to save him, just as he couldn't save Zack. The arms enclosing him could only belong to death…

By the time Leon had pulled Cloud onto his lap, the blonde had passed out from lack of oxygen, or too much oxygen, however the case may have it. Once he verified that Cloud was physically unharmed, Leon help the man close to his body, hopeful that this would be the last time he'd have to comfort a boyfriend over the loss of somebody important. First it was Reno, with Ariel and Eric, then Naminé for Cloud. Zack… they hardly even _knew _Zack. Leon couldn't stay strong forever. He hoped, for both their sakes, that Roxas would make it out okay.

~o~

The majority of the battle centered around Roxas. Many kinds of dusk, enemies, and friends alike surrounded him. Despite their attempts to flee from him, Roxas had not yet lost sight of the battalion that had first marched out onto the field: Xigbar, Luxord, and the boy in the mask. They all stayed mostly out of battle to protect Xemnas. Saïx was nowhere to be found.

The more Roxas fought to get to them, the farther back they seemed to retreat, but the maw didn't go on forever. A cliff face was approaching, and Roxas wasn't relenting. He was backing them into a corner, heart rate rising, vision clouding at the edges, his body prepared to strike.

That was when they sent out the ranks. The highest class of dusk hung back, protecting Xemnas, while the other three joined the fray, battling people of the King's Men in order to draw them further back. Once out of sight, Roxas didn't see Xigbar or Luxord again.

The one wearing the mask had skin like the Riku Replica's—nonexistent, with the Nobodies' insignia stamped over his chest. It had a Keyblade, like Roxas, so Roxas could only assume that was Vanitas, coming to get him. He feared to see what was under that mask. Did it have a face at all? Or were they identical, it and Roxas, like the Rikus? What if it went for Axel after finishing him off? What if it took his armor? Would Axel be able to figure it out? Sora couldn't. The only solution was to live, for Axel's sake.

Obviously that was easier said than done. The Vanitas hadn't even reached him yet and he could tell that he was outdone in speed and agility. Vanitas zipped between the dusks like they were wooden posts in an obstacle course. Maybe it was because it was on their side and they'd been ordered not to harm it, but they weren't moving out of its way, either. However the case would have it, it was clear that Roxas would have to take it down quickly, before it learned too much about him.

One blade clanged loudly against two as Vanitas launched itself into the air to attempt a downward blow. Roxas blocked it by crossing his Keyblades together. Vanitas was _wicked _fast, though. It'd lifted its blade and swung it around to the side so quickly that Roxas _barely _had enough time to duck. Because of his sloppiness, Roxas ended up on the ground. Vanitas was going for another downward blow already. Roxas took the second and a half he had after dodging it to get up and counter the attack. But by the time he'd done so, Vanitas had already turned around and attacked. Their blades clashed again. Roxas would have to change his strategy, and quickly.

The thing about Vanitas was that it didn't bother trying to break Roxas' strength. As soon as Roxas blocked it, it moved on to another strike, giving Roxas no time to do more than dodge or block it again. It was trying to outsmart him, so he, in turn, needed to outsmart it

When Vanitas attacked again, he was ready. Rather than using his regular X, Roxas blocked only with his left blade, and made a strike with his right. The Keyblade cut through its side, but its face betrayed no pain. Roxas didn't take even a second to smile at his victory, he didn't have time to. Vanitas was changing its strategy now, too. Now it was dancing around to try and get behind him. With a sickening _smack, _its bulky Keyblade struck Roxas in the shoulder. It was his good shoulder, thankfully, and the armor was holding up pretty well, but Vanitas would figure that out before long.

With a kicksweep from the ground, Roxas knocked Vanitas down and started wailing on him. The masked one had its Keyblade up to block him, but after so many blows, eventually its knee gave out, and Roxas could knock the blade away from it. With his Keyblades crossed over its throat, he had Vanitas trapped.

"Surrender," he said darkly. "And I won't kill you."

What a mistake that had been. Roxas had forgotten something, something so very obvious and vital, he wanted to kick himself. Key bearers could summon their blades. Vanitas, newly summoned blade in its hand, stood up and slashed the armor over Roxas' chest. It didn't cut through to the skin, but it did knock the wind clean out of him. He choked on his own breath, his head going foggy.

"Roxas! You must run! A Vanitas is impossible to fight alone!"

_Squelch._

Roxas blinked back the spots in his vision just in time to see a thin, simple gunblade go straight through Vanitas. But the attacker had given himself away. Whoever his savior was had put themselves in mortal peril. Roxas could only wait, wide eyed, to see who it was and whether or not they were safe.

Vanitas, upon being skewered, let out a gurgled, furious cry of pain and frustration before sinking to the ground. His blade stayed behind, the first six inches sunken into a time worn, but powerful old man. Said old man didn't seem too fazed. He angrily kicked off Vanitas' mask to reveal a disturbing sight. With a hysterical, maniacal expression of laughter on its face, a golden-eyed, black-haired version of Roxas stared up at them. Its complexion was synthetic and flawless looking, and its hair was much too long and unruly, but it was most certainly Roxas. The blonde cursed at his own naivety. There was no way the organization could have created that thing and not recognized him.

But he couldn't linger on the past now, not with the dire situation of the present. The old man sunk to his knees, grunting quietly in pain and clutching his skin near the sword.

"Ansem!" Roxas called, hurrying over to help him. "God dammit! You stupid old man, why did you do that!?"

"Because," Ansem coughed, "Some things are worth dying for."

Panicking, Roxas shook his head frantically, snarling, "Don't talk like that. You're not going to die. You're _not _dying on me today, gramps."

"I will if it is my time," said Ansem. "Leave me. There are more important things than my life at stake."

Roxas didn't know that those were the last words he'd ever speak. He didn't know for sure when Ansem lost consciousness, that he'd never get it back. The old man shut his eyes and became still. Maybe Roxas didn't know for sure, but he had a pretty damn good guess.

"_Son of a bitch_!" he shouted, pounding his fists on the ground, "You're all fucking dead!"

The blonde stood up and _charged. _He was unstoppable. No one, no dusk, no other Nobody could get in his way. His ears were filled with that clattering sound of his Keyblades against the metallic flesh. Dusks were shattering everywhere, littering the ground with their crumpling remains. Moments ago, Roxas conflicted greatly about killing dusks. But no more. They would _all _die, if it meant getting to Xemnas.

Xemnas was within reach now, guarded only by his pet dusk. The same class of dusk, as a matter of fact, that had taken Zack's life. Naturally, being Xemnas' guard dog made it look a lot sketchier to Roxas than it had to Cloud. That being said, he was hesitant and unsure how to kill it strategically.

"Hey Roxas!"

Roxas turned his head slightly to see Joshua running to him, Neku at his flank. "Wait a sec, and _definitely _don't go charging at it. We can take the big ugly freak."

"Which one?" Roxas muttered bitterly. He glanced quickly at the giant dusk. "Be careful of the lances."

"Good luck," said Joshua pleasantly.

"And you."

Roxas busied himself by retreating back into the crowd, which now included U.S. Soldiers, so as to not make himself too visually noticeable. The couple, on the other hand, were making themselves as loud and noticeable as possible, trying to lure the dusk away from Xemnas. Roxas couldn't see his face, not when it was covered so, but the psyche signature he carried was unmistakable. Why did he not do anything? With all the power of the cosmos on his side, surely he could make _him_self a little more useful to his army, rather than just hanging back and being protected like a king on his throne? Roxas observed him with a constant vigilance, not allowing escape from his vision even for a second.

His eyes darted away only for a second, seeking out Joshua and Neku. The dusk was a good distance away now, thoroughly distracted by the decoys. If Roxas was ever going to strike, the time to do it had come.

Steathily, he wove between the soldiers until he was back with the dusks. The army was doing a pretty good job of backing him up, and Roxas could weave through them and the enemies alike easily enough. -Xemnas was almost within reach now. With a well-aimed jump and a blinding enough light, Roxas just might be able to land an incapacitating hit.

Focusing all his psychic energy only on his light, Roxas' forehead exploded with white heat. He saw nothing but bright light, but he sprang anyway, using Xemnas' signature aura as a guide. He put both of his Keyblades together and clasped them with two hands, his arms raised high and ready to strike with as much force as was capable of him.

But them his powers were cut off completely. He was out, literally like a light, and it was no longer his own will that held him in place, it was Xemnas.' A ball of energy, fledged from Roxas' original ball of light, began to swell, forming a constantly moving, celestial, incandescent vortex of omnipotence.

~o~

A young woman of twenty-two—whom had not set foot outside Hollow Bastion General since the eve of the mine explosions—rose from her bed to see what the bright light outside was. She was very fortunate; her bed was provided for her at no charge, given her current medical condition. Luckier still, she had already been an admitted patient when the demand for care suddenly rose. If she hadn't been, there would have been nothing the hospital could have done for her.

The light which drew her from her bed in the first place was growing brighter. It was so bright, in fact, that even from a great distance it illuminated her green eyes to their brightest natural color.

Trying to keep her heart rate down, the young woman cradled her rounded midsection tenderly, instinctively creating an illusion of safety for both herself and her unborn child.

~o~

A few miles away, another young woman was hustling about a large warehouse, serving meager food to the needy unfortunate, when too small children came sprinting directly for her. When they reached her, the eldest one stayed arm's reach away, but the toddler clung fearfully to her legs, quivering and out of breath.

Even though they were only children, their behavior alarmed her immediately. Handing off the soup pot to somebody else, she swept her long bangs out of her face, kneeled, and gave the girls her undivided attention. She had enough tact and experience to treat the situation with the delicacy it deserved. The children had probably seen a dead body. Somebody frozen to death, or starved. This was almost typical nowadays.

"Sister Aerith!" the older cried, her chest heaving, "Just came… from the west end. You need to come… with us… right away!"

"Why? What's happening?" Aerith demanded, though gently. With any other children, she might have been a bit skeptical, but she knew this girl and what she'd been through. There was more wisdom in those little brown eyes than that which most women twice her age possessed.

The girl paused, filling her lungs with gulps of air. "They told me… the army… marching. We need to go to… to the mansion in the woods. Please! It's gotta be now! There's gonna be another invasion! I came over here to get you… because I don't want you to get hurt… and we're going to need a mother when the city's gone…"

She started crying, though she didn't cry like a child. She didn't wail or sob or pound her little fists on the floor. She cried like an adult, with quiet, broken tears of fear. Her cheeks and her eyes were red, and she swallowed often enough. She and her sister both began to pull the woman towards the exit, but Aerith held back. "But wait, now. If what you're saying is true, than we need to get everyone out of here. We can all walk across the city together."

"It's too late! Please, _please _Aerith! For once, forget everyone else and save yourself! You've done all you can but the city is as good as gone!" the child thundered. "It's already started!"

Shocked into silence by the girl's persistence, Aerith allowed herself to be dragged outside, where she saw the light for herself. Her eyes widened to dinner plates and her pupils shrunk to poppy seeds, because this could only be the work of the devil.

"I'm scared…" said the smaller girl, burying her head into Aerith's legs.

Aerith secretly agreed with the girl, so she lifted her up. Aerith needed to hide with the children just as much as the children needed to hide with Aerith. In a moment they'd be running, but at the time, she could hardly do any more than grasp each of them and say a silent prayer.

~o~

Marluxia was a considerably busy guy. His wardrobe had been seriously downsized as of late, he was always fixing clothes for _other _people, he'd finally broken into the piles and piles of spare fabric in his storage bins, _and, _all of his services were pretty much _free. _It wasn't an ideal situation for him, but as long as the food suppliers were still willing to trade with him and he was allowed to keep his penthouse, he considered himself very lucky.

Well, at the moment, he'd just about had enough for the day. He'd sewn four shirts from scratch, mended six winter jackets, and peddled his favorite H&M scarf for a chicken. His fingers were sore and he absolutely _had _to fix the faulty button on his business jacket _pronto. _

Tossing his perfect pink hair over his shoulders, the man sat down at his desk and readied his sewing machine. Just as he was through winding his bobbin, however, he was startled out of his seat by a loud noise and a blinding flash of white light. Hoping to whoever that nobody had heard him squeal, he jumped from the floor to observe and possibly film the first winter thunderstorm he'd ever seen.

Unfortunately for him, reality had no plans of meeting his expectations today. What he saw instead was not a storm at all, but what he could only describe as a supernova growing from the center of the great maw. He was stunted. There was no police force left to call, the government was basically shattered, and everyone that Marluxia had once known were either gone or unreachable.

So, frightened and alone, he sank down beneath the window onto his plush rug, hugging himself and thinking that whatever happened now, that the pain of death wouldn't last too long.

~o~

There was nothing Roxas could do. He was held in place, powerless to stop the vortex from enveloping himself and everything around him. The light obscured his vision completely; he was cut off from the world, limited, to himself and Xemnas. Xemnas looked like he wasn't even breaking a sweat. He just stood there, arm outstretched. The wind blew his hood down, and Roxas, after all this time, could finally see the bone chilling truth of what he'd been hiding underneath.

Xemnas resembled Terra greatly, _was _Terra, for all intents and purposes. His facial bone structure was almost exactly the same, bearing only a few features from who Roxas assumed was the real Xehanort. He had that same strong chin, the same angled nose. The only difference was the eyes. They were not Terra's, gentle and good. No, they were evil. The color had changed to a fiery orange hue, framed by untamed, overgrown white hair. The eyes, they began to draw him in, the pupils getting larger and larger until Roxas fell into them completely.

And then he remembered _everything._

He remembered the dreams, and all the memories he had seen, and all the emotions that came with them. Then, more things came to him. Things he hadn't witnessed before. All of Ven's memories were filling his skull, from the first to the last breath, and all the things in between. He remembered Ventus' childhood, growing up and being trained. He remembered the bittersweet twinge of happiness Ven experienced when he found out that Aqua was with child, and _especially _the ecstasy he had when he found out Vanille was with child. And he could also remember a month prior to that, when no such happy things existed. He remembered the terrible, sinking feeling of marching out to battle so soon after his honeymoon, the guilt of mutiny; betraying the evil man he knew only to be his master.

He saw Aqua's face, lined with horror and misery as they did the unthinkable. Joining their Keyblades together, the two were forced to seal the temple underground, with Xehanort—and Terra—trapped inside. He felt Ven's pain and despair, the crushing sensation of losing his best friend, forever.

"Ventus!"

Ven opened his eyes. There was no Roxas, Roxas wasn't there anymore. Perhaps he'd been lingering still, somewhere deep inside, but when Terra called, it was Ven who responded. Even his Keyblade was different. One of Roxas' lie on the ground forgotten, and the other had transformed into the custom backhand blade that carried Ventus through all those years.

He looked around fearfully, but there was nothing to see. No bright light, no gale force winds, no supernova, nothing but the stained glass room with the door. Xemnas was kneeled on the ground, panting. When he lifted his head and opened his eyes, orange they were not. They were Terra's, a warm shade of chocolate brown* with golden flecks. But the reunion was not a peaceful one. A second later, blades clashed and they were fighting again. Old memories of those stolen moments in the woods came to Ventus' mind. It felt just like he was sparring again, but something in him knew there'd be more than his pride hurt if he lost this battle.

"Terra…" he said, confused and hurt, "What's going on!?"

He got a hit on Terra, causing him to stagger back. "I don't want to hurt you. I'm not… exactly in control of my body. I lost, Ven. I've been in here the whole time, sleeping for almost as long as I can remember. Master Xehanort… he beat me, but he couldn't get rid of me." Ventus parried his attack and followed up with a series of offensive blows, trying only to disarm him. Terra must have freed himself completely from Xehanort's hold now, because he allowed the blade to be forced from his grip, and he didn't pick it back up. "I was gone for so long… even when the light found me, by then, I couldn't even find myself. And then I heard your voice. You came for me. You came to wake me up. It was you, Ven."

"Not Ven," said the blonde, shaking his head. "It's Roxas now. He's here somewhere. It's him that'll be doing the rescuing. Not me."

Terra's features melted into a fond smile. "Roxas, then… how's the world? What's it like? How long has it been, really?"

He started to walk, gesturing for Ventus to do the same. They walked arm in arm like old friends. Ventus wasn't sure how long the cathedral-like area went on for, but it didn't matter. It had been so long since he'd seen Terra, there had been so many tears. "I'm not really sure," Ven admitted. "Like I said, this is Roxas' mind now. I've only caught little snippets. They've got this great, iron boxes with wheels on them that they use for transportation, and powderless bombs. And polyester! You really should see it."

Terra smiled sadly at him. He knew as well as Ventus that he would never be able to see those things. "Tell me more," he said quietly.

"Hmm… I don't even know where to start. Everything is so different. It's like taking a creature from the sea and asking him to talk about life on land. Roxas is especially fond of these doohickeys that they have… I think it's called a camera. With the push of a knob, it can make _exact _drawings of anything you point it at! Anything at all! And in perfect color too. The colors are really limitless, you know, they have dyes for everything you can imagine, even purple!"

It was like they'd never been separated at all. Ventus chatted gaily about the things he'd seen for several minutes, Terra nodding and smiling and listening intently. But it wasn't to last. Terra kept glancing toward the door, as if he were afraid that at any moment, Xehanort would stop through and destroy them.

"I wish we had more time," he said finally, effectively cutting off Ventus' happy rambling. "But we don't. The world needs you back, and you need to hurry. I can hold him off, but only for a little while. When I have him paralyzed, you cannot hesitate. You _must _kill him. Because if he breaks from my hold, I won't be able to stop him again. Nobody will."

_So it wasn't Roxas after all… _Ventus mused. _After all this time, it's been Terra who would be the fall of Xehanort. Because Roxas was there to wake him up._

"But if I kill him…" fat tears welled up shamelessly in Ventus' eyes, spilling over onto his cheeks. "No! I can't do it! You'll be killed too! We have to get you out first! There _has _to be another way!"

He threw his Keyblade angrily on the floor and dropped with it, angry tears running free. He kneeled onto the ground and put his arms around Ventus. Warmth. Real, living, human warmth. Terra was still here.

"But there isn't," he responded. "Xehanort's original body is long gone. Buried, or burned I'd imagine. There's no host body he could go into without taking it over, becoming a parasite. Like he did mine." He said this a little bitterly. "This is the way it has to be. He'll take everything. He'll start putting mother's cells in the people again. He'll destroy everything. You, your Vanille… everyone…"

"I can't, I can't kill you," the blonde wailed miserably.

"You can, and you will," said Terra. "I don't belong here anymore, you know that. I'm behind an _entire _cycle. A thousand years out of my time. I'd never make it. Xehanort is a part of me now. We aren't Terra and Xehanort anymore. We are Xemnas. The last living place of evil. And Xemnas… it must be allowed to die."

He stood up, extending his hand for Ventus to take. With reluctance, Ventus accepted the help and stood back up. A moment passed in which the two simply looked at each other, knowing it would be the last time. Terra looked away first, turning away to face the door and stretch out his hand. The door opened, and light poured out, flooding the scene with that same bright light. The world, calling Ventus back to it.

"It's time to go, Ven. If you stay any longer he'll notice I'm here. I know that you'll do the right thing…"

White flooded Ven's vision, and soon he could no longer see Terra. Roxas, overwhelmed by memories, experiences, and the parting words of Terra to Ventus, was disoriented, to say the least, when he was tossed back into the world. The world where all of his friends were still in danger, where Axel was still fighting, where everything would incontrovertibly be lost if he didn't do as Terra said.

He hit the ground hard, but, heeding Terra's instruction, was back on his feet in a second. It pained him greatly to look at Xemnas, now that he had seen Terra with his own eyes. The gentle, loving face that Ven was familiar with was simply _not meant to be _contorted the way it was. The malice etched into his features, the darkness behind his eyes, the curve of his lips as the corner raised into a frustrated sneer, they didn't belong there. His hair whipped incessantly in the wind created by the supernova, yet it never touched his face or got in the way. In fact, he appeared to have not changed at all in the time that Terra had drawn Roxas in. It had seemed like several minutes, maybe hours even that they'd talked, but could it really have been only a fraction of a second?

For the first time, Xemnas made full eye contact with Roxas and, as though just noticing his presence, opened his mouth to shout in an alarmingly amplified volume: "Behold, feeble mortal, the power of Jenova!" Clearly he was confident in his victory. Had it not been for Terra's promise, Roxas might have been too. "Your little tricks and elements, they are _nothing _to me. I could kill you with a thought!"

"Then—why haven't you?" Roxas coughed. His physical condition was reaching critical again, something that he'd temporarily forgotten. The pain wasn't too bad, he just couldn't seem to get a good breath in.

His taunt did what it was meant to. The anger broke Xemnas' concentration, and Roxas was at last free from his hold. But that didn't make approaching him easy. He wasn't more than fifteen feet away, but running to him was like running against a heavy wind. _Very _heavy winds. As if for every pace Roxas took, an invisible hand pushed him back, like the tide pushing back the shore.

Infuriated, Xemnas lifted Roxas into the air and chucked him effortlessly into the cliff wall. The material was very hard, made up of a similar stone to that of the Rising Falls. Roxas' skull cracked hard against it, forcing his vision to spin uncontrollably. He collapsed in a heap, but, knowing that even though it _really _fucking hurt, and even though it looked like he was seeing through a kaleidoscope, he couldn't give up yet. He had to keep trying, until Terra could come and help. Terra promised.

"Why won't you quit?!" Roxas yelled. He threw his Keyblade with as much force as he could muster, but the level of disorientation he'd been caused rendered his aim useless. He missed, by a lot. At this point, he knew that he was only baiting himself to buy time. But there was only so much he could do. If he didn't attack soon, Xemnas would tire of games and flat out kill him. And then all of his friends would die, and Axel would die.

All of Roxas' telepathic shields went up, blocking Xemnas' next mental strike and also concealing his thoughts of Axel from the enemy. The last thing he needed were illusions. His prime objective for now was to get as close to the godlike being as possible without dying.

"Wh-what's happening? What is this black magic!?"

Xemnas' powers were slowing down; is limbs were curling in on themselves. "_EoЖ lif dominaχict Terra!" _he began screaming. Roxas, though having never learned Pre Colonial Bastonian himself, understood him through Ventus' knowledge. He was suspicious of Terra, but he did not yet know how to reassert his dominance over his sentient possessor. Roxas would have to move fast.

Roxas didn't have time to strike physically; he was too far away. So instead, he resorted to the taboo. The one thing he vowed, the second he found out about his cells, that he would never do to another person: leech to kill. Xemnas' shields were down, courtesy of Terra, so it was exceedingly simple to tap into his lifestream. In fact it was almost as though his aura was calling out to Roxas. The connection overwhelmed him with pain. The power was more than his mind could bear.

He felt all the evil, the energy, the goddess Jenova herself. But beyond all that, he felt Terra there, in all of his warmth and goodness, holding the darkness back. Taking a deep breath to slow the quakes of his failing body, Roxas absorbed all the power. The energy filled him utterly, every single artery from his heart to his little toe. The heat spread so thoroughly, and he was shocked and sickened to feel no longer pain, but euphoria. The _power, _the _ecstasy, _it was all his!

Roxas rose high into the air, taking Xemnas with him. Jubilant laughter coursed through him, the vibrations buzzing through even the innermost places that Roxas had either never felt before or had been feeling for so long he didn't realize he could feel them. Tingling sensations pricked the core of his stomach, his kidneys, his lungs, even. All flooded with the most pleasurable toxins. He laughed maniacally, uncontrollably. His voice boomed, in the same, unnaturally inhuman way that Xemnas' had.

But the power was too much. The pressure in his body had reached breaking point. If he did not give it an outlet, and soon, he would be torn apart from the inside. Already he could feel it working on the weakened parts of himself, particularly the head. The lofty, dreamlike state was ebbing away, and Roxas came back to himself. He focused on channeling it through to his forehead, like he had done a hundred times before. It took everything he had not to release it all indiscriminately, to remember his task. He had his target fixed—Xemnas' heart—and all of the pieces were in place. It was only after blue eyes met orange one last time, after Roxas uttered a last, tearful goodbye to Terra, that he released.

There was a blast of heat and light, a shockwave that traveled all the way across the maw, through the city, and even out to the countryside beyond. Every man woman, and dusk alike stopped in their embattlements to watch the spiraling wave of galvanism elevate Xemnas higher up as Roxas sank lower down, and destroy him. Nothing of him remained, no sparkling dust from which his powers could be taken and harnessed. No body to bury, no ashes to spread, not even a follicle of hair. He was _gone. _Vanished—into the world, maybe. Or perhaps finally, after many a lifetime of waiting, Jenova had returned to take back what was hers.

Silence tolled heavily through the maw. The dusks fell to the ground, lifeless and useless, empty puppets. They'd given back the magic stolen and used to animate them. The winds stopped, the fogs dropped, and the fires began to kindle. All signs of the darkness were gone, but the same could be said for the light. As for Roxas, he felt nothing. No more nagging presence probing within his mind, no burning powers beating through his heart. His Keyblades fell to the floor and vanished, for the last time.

For several long moments, Roxas sat, his back leaned up against the wall. He was torn. On one hand, he needed to find Axel, make sure he was okay. He had to find the others too, get home, find the kids in the woods and tell them things were okay.

On the other hand… his head really fucking hurt. He was almost certain that his skull was cracked. The skin was indisputably broken, at any rate. He still couldn't breathe right from Vanitas' blow and he couldn't fell past the elbow of his left arm.

Roxas crawled forward a little, but the effort caused shooting pain wherever he moved; the effort was simply too great. With a resigned sigh of "fuck it," Roxas decided that, given the circumstances, he deserved at least a little stupid break. So he keeled over and waited to be found. He knew that it wouldn't take too long, everyone in the _city _knew where he was. He could hear the approaching footsteps even then.

He watched, almost contentedly, as the purplish clouds rolled across the sky, parting in some places to reveal patches of an irreplicable blue. Somewhere nearby, a mourning dove had just returned to its nest, seated in one of the many niches in the cliff side. It called out to the valley, in hopes of someday soon, hearing a reply.

* * *

><p><strong>There will be an epilogue. <strong>


	26. Epilogue

**I… I really don't know what to say to you guys. Umm… **

**Thank you…**

* * *

><p>~<em>Epilogue~<em>

"So it's really gone? Completely?" Axel questioned, hobbling alongside Roxas with one crutch under his arm. "You don't feel anything anymore? Not even a tiny bit?"

"No, no, no, _no, _for the thousandth time, _no._" Roxas huffed, a smile pulling through despite his mild irritation. "You can't do it, Zexion can't do it, Cloud can't do it, _nobody _else can do it anymore. What makes you think I can?"

Axel chuckled shortly, turning his head back out towards the golden sky. "I dunno. I thought if anyone still had it, you would. The sun's getting lower. Where's that beautiful, heart-stopping, Hollywood train station sunset you've been promising me?"

At Roxas' request, he and Axel had been transported to Twilight Town on an emergency military aircraft just as soon as they were able-bodied. The prior events were a blur to Roxas. Somebody had found him, obviously, lying face up in the maw on the brink of consciousness. They'd brought him back to the hospital unit to discover that there was absolutely nothing wrong with him. Aside from a nasty friction burn on the back of his head, and very minor chest trauma, Roxas had gotten off fairly easy that time. No organ failure, anyway. Just a hell of a massive migraine.

Zack was gone, which just about killed Roxas inside. Tidus was gone too, as was announced by a very loud and very distraught Sora. So was DiZ. Shortly after making it back to _Poir, _Kefka died from his wounds, but nobody seemed too keen on mourning him. Other than those four, eighteen other nameless U.S. soldiers died too. In honor of them, the remaining troops and the rest of the King's Men held a memorial service in the city.

It seemed that the Jenova cells were no more. As far as anyone could tell, those who had possessed the gifts had them no longer. Neither Sora nor Roxas could summon their Keyblades again. Although a bit shocking, this sudden lack of power didn't alarm anyone too much. There wasn't any need for ancient hocus pocus anymore. Xehanort was gone.

Roxas' dreams stopped as well. He had the entirety of Ven's life to reflect upon, if he so chose. And oftentimes he did. He could spend hours at a time watching Ventus' life like a movie, skipping the boring bits and the sad bit as he pleased. Granted, sometimes he had dreams of _being _Ventus, or of general hanging out in Ventus' life, but those weren't like the memories.

Reno was just fine, as Axel was delighted to find out, and he'd departed for Midgar with Rude at the same time as Axel and Roxas went for Twilight Town. Their parting was on _much _better terms than it had been the last time, however, and Roxas got the feeling there would be many visits in the future.

"I don't think your leg can handle the trip to the clock tower just yet," Roxas laughed. "For now, we can go to sunset hill. That's pretty much the next best thing."

"Lead the way," said Axel agreeably.

Roxas felt a rush of affection for his hometown as they walked along the winding cobblestone roads. Twilight Town was _hilly,_ and it was full of color and life, whereas Hollow Bastion, even before recent events, was colorless and flat, with perhaps the exception of the rising falls. But Twilight Town was warm, and beautiful. Rich with tomes of orange and yellow and green, it was no wonder most of the natives didn't want to leave.

Sunset hill had the second best view in Twilight Town. It looked down on the rest of the town, and the neighboring woods. The view stretched on as far as the eye could see, following the snaking railroad track until it disappeared into the distance. No buildings, trees, or otherwise obstructions blocked the view of the sky, and that made it a very popular destination for young couples such as themselves, though Roxas didn't believe that there was another pair out there quite like them.

They sat down side by side, holding hands and staring out to the horizon.

"What now?" said Axel after perhaps a moment of silence. "What do we do?"

"I don't know," said Roxas pensively. "Whatever we want, I guess. You could model again if you wanted. I could finish school, get my degree, take pictures again. Or we could start all over. We could get involved with the restoration program, or go traveling. For now though, I really like just being home."

In a month's time, they would go back to Hollow Bastion and found the _Hollow Bastion Restoration Committee _with Leon and the others. The Castle That Never Was was left to fall to ruin, all of its artifacts removed and donated to the City of Hollow Bastion. _Poir _was restored and used as the foundation for the Committee. In a year's time they would all attend Demyx and Zexion's wedding in Atlantica, where the pair had decided to fully settle down and work in marine biology with Demyx's parents.

The fall of the nobodies was disguised as a meteor, though the majority of the city knew better than to believe it. Since there was no acting police force at the time, nobody had the resources to investigate the crater. People who proclaimed the truth were written off as conspiracy theorists and over time, the story was accepted and eventually the truth was forgotten.

Introducing Axel to his parents was probably the hardest thing Roxas ever had to do. Go to war, slay a couple hundred dusks, kill a god? No problem. But to bring home a tall, intimidation looking man to his sort-of Christian parents only a few months after Naminé's passing? It was nothing short of torturous. Thankfully, Roxas' parents were very gracious and understanding about it, and even despite not knowing the whole truth about the relationship, they blessed it right away. Axel was accepted into the home with open arms.

The sun sank lower, transforming the sky around it from that soft, celadon blue to a fiery array of reds and pinks, which faded into a royal violet the farther away one looked from the sun. Axel and Roxas just talked, about everything and nothing, until one rough, adamant, all-too-familiar voice interrupted the conversation.

"Roxas!?"

Nice, Hayner. Very original.

The blonde spun around, his heart swelling to twice its normal size as he indeed saw Hayner, along with Pence and Olette, approaching the pair on the top of the hill. Olette's eyes were swimming; Pence positively beamed.

Hayner was looking a little aggressive, though. He swaggered over to Roxas, hands on his hips. "So, why didn't you tell us you were coming?" he got all up in Roxas' face; Roxas was unsure whether to laugh or run away. "You make us _worry _sick about you, and then you come home and don't even _call? _What, got no time for your friends now that you're running around at that place saving Hollow Bastion?"

Roxas and Axel caught eyes briefly and shared a secret laugh. "Oh Hayner, you don't know the half of it."

Hayner started to steam, but Olette stepped in to rescue them. "I'm sure they were going to drop in!" she scolded. Which was the honest truth. It was only their second day in Twilight Town, and the first didn't include much aside from settling in and eating enough for twenty. "Can't you see they're hurt? You didn't get caught in the meteor incident, did you? _Tell _me you weren't stupid enough?"

Roxas was tired of hearing the cover story. He was tired of lying to his friends, his family, and to the world. After maybe a split second's hesitation, he quietly muttered, "It wasn't a meteor…"

"Roxas," Axel warned.

"Shut up," Roxas replied, though not so harsh as to hurt Axel's feelings, but with enough conviction to carry the point across. "I won't lie to them. Naminé was their friend, and so was Xion. And most importantly, they are _my _friends. They have the right to know what really happened."

Axel didn't say anything, though the grimace on his face spoke his disapproval loudly enough. His eyes shifted skeptically from the three of them, then back over to Roxas. After that, he carefully, did a 360 of the area to make sure nobody was within sight or earshot. Finally, he let out an exhausted sigh. "I'll help fill in the parts you were out for."

Beginning his story at the "photo" incident, Roxas explained everything in the most extreme detail that he could recall. He stepped back and let Axel explain his perspective of the city blowing up and his adventures with Leon. Olette cried when Roxas discusses the scene of Naminé's death—even though he skipped out of the majority of the details on that one—and she sighed dreamily when Axel and Roxas explained together the conditions of the Pull. Pence was attentive and asked lots of questions about the Jenova cells and the lifestream.

It was well past nightfall by the time Roxas had even gotten to the part about Xion's betrayal. It was a hard, intense moment for all of them. Roxas had the idea that Pence was getting ready to ask if maybe there'd been a mistake or a misunderstanding, but something in Roxas' tone of voice must have silenced him. Olette looked horrified and stricken, but she did not cry again.

Hayner, to the shock of everyone, all but exploded. Red faced and furious, he wove a tapestry of obscenities that as far as they knew was still hanging in space over Lake Michigan.

It took close to ten minutes to calm him down, and even then, although he had stopped shouting and cussing, his hands were balled into founds wound so tight his knuckles paled. Then Roxas saw something he hadn't seen since Kindergarten: fat, angry tears trailing glistening tracks down Hayner's reddened cheeks. Xion found Hayner first, but until then, Hayner always assumed that it was he who found her. In coaxing him into her friendship, she had the rest of the group between her little fingers. Once Hayner approved of somebody, they were in. That's just how it worked.

Knowing this, Roxas could easily deduce the amount of self-blame that the knowledge of her betrayal had implicated. He'd felt it too. "It wasn't your fault," he said, mirroring Axel's words to him, "She had us all fooled."

"It's so hard to think about her the way you describe," Olette said, "She always seemed so happy, and nice, and innocent… all that time, she wanted us dead. Through all those summer vacations, all the trips to the beach, all the nights at the clock tower, she _knew _she'd be leading Roxas to his death."

Roxas had known all this and accepted it, and yet hearing one of his best friends saying it so clean cut like that, it murdered him all over again.

"So, thankfully, after that Cloud came round and thumped her on the head," Axel said quickly, in a clear attempt to diffuse the tension. "We never saw her again after that."

"I hope she's dead," Hayner said bitterly. "I hope they found her in that dungeon and turned her into a dusk for what she did."

Olette put her arm tentatively around his shoulders. "You don't mean that, Hayner," she said gently, "You loved her. We all did. She doesn't deserve to die. I think… she deserves to live more than any of us. Don't you think? I'm sure that's what she really wanted. The only time she ever got the chance to be normal was with us."

"I don't want to talk about her anymore," said Roxas. "I've already had to tell you, Axel, the rest of the resistance, and, to a certain extent, my parents."

Olette shuddered. "Okay, but it's getting cold out. Why don't you finish telling us what happened at the usual spot? We have all night."

"Right," Roxas agreed, standing up and helping Olette to do the same. "So, after Cloud came for me, he busted the door open with his cells, and we starting _sprinting _through this labyrinth of cages filled with dusks, just trying to find the way out…"

Roxas continued his story as the five of them all walked together, hand in hand, down the dirt path off the moonlit hill. Fireflies rose from the foliage where they stepped, joining in the celestial cluster of stars adorning the deep purple twilight. Home, to Roxas, is where the heart is, and after what seemed a lifetime of searching, he could at last say he knew he was where he belonged.

~_Fin_~


End file.
